11x02 - The Walker Zombley

[bunniefuu]

(Springs creaking)

Ricky: Oh, yeah, baby, that's the stuff.

Oh, that's a nice rhythm, just like that.

Yeah, just keep going like that.

Ohhh...

Trinity: Oh, my God, Jacob!

Dad, help!

Ricky: What the f*ck's going on, Trin, you okay?

Trinity: It's Jacob, he won't wake up!

I can't tell if he's breathing.

Woman: Jacob, Jacob, wake up!

Ricky: Okay, just a minute.

I'll be right in, Trin.

Trinity: Oh, my God!

He's breathing.

He's not okay.

I don't know what's wrong.

Ricky: Come on, we don't have a lot of time, gotta make this quick.

Just ignore the voices!

We can do this.

Come on!

Jesus Christ!

Sarah: Holy sh*t!

What the f*ck are you doing, Sarah?

What am I doing?

What the f*ck are you doing?

f*ck off with the camera!

Who the f*ck were you talking to?

My hand.

What?

Sarah, I'm sorry, this is all I got right now.

I find if I talk with my hand, it works a bit better, okay?

Ricky, you are so f*cked!

What the f*ck's going on with Jacob?

He's f*cked up.

Come in.

(Shallow breathing)

Ricky: Holy f*ck!

Holy f*ck!

Okay, Trin, stay calm.

Grab a f*cking Kn*fe or something sharp.

You gotta shove it right through his eye socket and make sure it comes out the other side.

Dad, what the f*ck are you talking about?

He's turned, Trin, he's turned.

It's too late for him now, okay?

Have you ever seen "The Walking Of The Dead"?

It's okay, dude.

Stay calm, everyone.

Stay calm.

Okay, get away from him!

I'm gonna sh**t him through the f*cking head!

That's what you've gotta do!

I gotta sh**t through the f*cking head.

Bubbles: Ricky!

What are you doing?

Stay back!

Stay back!

He'll try to bite you!

Dad, stop!

You can't sh**t your son-in-law in the head!

He's not my f*cking son-of-law anymore.

He's a walker zombley!

He's not gonna eat my f*cking family!

(Theme music)

(Mixed yelling)

If he bites us, we're all going to be f*cking zomblies.

Get out of the way!

(Yells)

(Mixed yelling)

If we don't sh**t him, we're all gonna f*cking die here.

Ricky, give me the f*cking g*n!

What are you doing?

Give it to me.

(Yells)

He's a zomblie.

Would everybody calm down, please.

Ricky.

What?

There's no such thing as zombies, okay?

What the f*ck is that, right there?

Rick!

We've got a lot of work to do.

Stop f*cking around.

Dad, you have to take him to the hospital.

We've got a bit of running around to do.

I'll take him right after that.

No, Dad, now.

Look at him.

He needs to go to the hospital.

I'm sorry, Julian.

I know we got a lot of stuff to do but family comes first.

I love my f*cking family.

Family?

Who?

That?

The guy you were gonna sh**t in the head two seconds ago?

Hi, Julian!

Two seconds ago that wasn't Jacob in my mind.

We've got to take him.

I don't want to catch this sh*t and the rest of my family catching it!

Julian, it could be a f*cking crazy squirrel disease.

I bet that's what it is.

f*ck's sakes.

All right.

Cory, get him out of those sex underwear and strap him on the roof with some straps and top up my brake fluid.

My brakes have been f*cking me around lately, all right?

'kay, dude.

Dad, you're not strapping him to the roof of the car!

He can ride in the car.

I'm not catching that sh*t.

Put him in the trunk, then.

He's probably gonna f*cking die anyway.

What?

You think I might die?

Have you looked at yourself?

Yes, you could f*cking die!

You look f*cked!

All right, Cory, you're gonna go with them to the hospital.

Bubs, let's go to the nutrients store.

Don't worry.

We'll take care of him.

All right, sweetie?

Good to see you guys.

Ricky, stop f*cking around.

Promise?

Bubbles: He promises, Julian.

I'm f*cking sorry, I thought you were a f*cking zombley.

But why would you go and do this?

Like, you completely f*cked this day up!

I'm really sorry, Ricky.

I'm not jealous, Randy.

I just care about you, that's all.

And I don't want to see you get hurt.

And I'm sorry if I care about you.

Randy, come on and get your breakfast.

Double sugar bacon!

Randy: I'm not eating that, sir.

I'm off the bacon.

Oh, you're off the bacon?

Since when?

You had two whole packages on Tuesday.

Randy: Well, no anymore.

I'm in training.

Where did you get the shirt?

Ted gave it to me.

He's gonna help train me and he's going to pull some strings to get me into the police college.

Oh, I see.

Is that all he's gonna be pulling, Randy?

I don't like this, Randy.

I don't f*cking like this one bit!

Well, I'm doing it, sir.

And, if you care about me as much as you say you do, you'll be supportive and proud of me.

(Car honk beeping)

If anything crazy goes down here today, call me on my cell for back-up.

For f*ck's sakes!

(Dishes clatter)

Ricky: Is he dead yet?

Cory: Okay, we made it, dude.

You're gonna be all right.

How do you feel?

Oh, I felt better before we left but I feel worse now.

(Coughs)

I think it's the exhaust fumes.

Cory: Oh, man, I'm gonna get a wheelchair.

It could be the exhaust fumes or it could be more Symp-sons coming on.

If it is the exhaust fumes, here smoke this.

It'll cancel them out.

Listen, Jacob.

There's something I want you to know, bud.

I know that you probably think that I think, you know, you're...

a f*cking idiot, you're like some weird insect-y man.

You know, my daughter married a loser with no f*cking money and no chance of keeping a good job because you're too dumb.

But you know what?

It doesn't even matter if I did think all that.

I actually think...

(Coughs)

that you're a pretty good guy.

I actually like you.

Thanks, man.

I think I've may even been...

starting to love you a little bit.

Anyway I just wanted you to know all that 'cause you're probably not gonna make it.

What?

You think I'm not gonna make it?

Look at your f*cking hair.

It's just coming right out, buddy.

You're f*cked.

(Panting, wheezing)

Don't worry, though, buddy.

Come on, we'll get you inside.

Me and Cory we're gonna be with you till the end.

The end?

What do you mean, the end?

What do you mean, the end?

(Clanking)

Jesus Christ, Cory!

Why is all this sh*t so expensive, man?

Look, that's 80 bucks.

Oh, I know.

I've been buying it.

I know how expensive it is.

Bubs, stop grabbing at yourself.

I'm not grabbing at myself.

I get nervous and my bird starts doing that.

If it's not at the right angle, I get a kink into it.

Why are you nervous?

We're not doing anything illegal.

Oh, no...

Nothing illegal about growing 400 f*cking dope plants in record time!

Nothing illegal there.

We're buying fertilizer, man.

Yeah!

f*ck, just relax.

Alrighty, fellas, I've done some digging here.

I can do pretty much everything on the old list here, buddy.

Perfect.

Except for the...

Nuclear Bloom, she's on back order.

What?

Isn't that the most important sh*t?

How in the f*ck is it on back order?

Last week you had almost a full barrel.

Yeah, but it's Sonny Ding, the potato farmer.

Come in and bought it all.

Sonny Ding from Eastern Shore?

Yeah...

Yeah, he's only got one upper lip.

No, that's not Sonny.

(Chuckles)

Everybody's only got one upper lip.

I'm just f*cking with you!

You got me.

So when are you getting more in?

Oh, you're looking at two weeks.

Yeah...

Slow boat from China sh*t.

f*ck's sakes.

f*cking China!

And their slow boats!

I know.

A bit of a wake-up call, huh?

The police force is not for everybody.

This is ridiculous.

There's lots of cops fatter than I am around.

Actually, no there's not.

You're gonna have to lose at least 50 pounds if I have any hope in hell of getting you into the college.

Frig this.

(Panting)

I'm not losing any frigging weight.

You gotta figure out a way to get me into the frigging college or George is gonna see this.

(Video recording on phone)

Ted: Harder.

Randy: Why isn't it working?

Ted: Oh yeah.

Randy: How's that, Ted?

Ted: Try harder, Randy, try harder.

Ooohh yeah.

Now take me through the drive thru at the King.

And you're frigging paying!

Big f*ck-up, Cory.

(Chuckles)

(Indistinct call on P.A.)

Bye-bye.

Err, dude, I think the horse moves in...

the shape of an R or letter M or something.

What kind of a f*cking hornse would move in the shape of letters?

It's a hornse.

It goes wherever the f*ck it wants.

Unless it tied up but, see any ropes here?

It's not tied up.

f*ck, you're dumb sometimes, Cory.

I'm sorry, dude.

Man, I'm just so freaked out about Jacob, man.

I don't know what to do.

I know.

f*ck, he's so young.

What a shame.

I know it must be hard on you.

I mean, you already lost one idiot best friend and now you're going to lose another one.

It's not fair.

Well, I don't he's gonna die or anything, dude.

I think...

Oh, f*ck, I knew it!

He didn't make it.

What?

Are you serious?

f*ck!

Jacob's dead?

No!

No, no...

Cory, come here, bud.

We're gonna get through this, man.

How the f*ck am I going to tell Trin?

(Sobbing)

f*ck's sakes!

Guys, guys, Jacob's not dead.

He just had an allergic reaction to dog hair.

But a violent one.

That's it?

He's allergic to dogs?

Oh, my f*ck.

Jacob, you f*cking idiot!

I'm really sorry, Ricky.

It's, uh, it's not Jacob's fault.

He has a very strange element in his blood.

I've not been able to identify it but I'm guessing it's related to his reaction to the dog.

Now, uh, make sure you keep this bracelet on.

It's got all your information on it.

If the condition worsens, I want you to come back here immediately.

Okay, thanks, Doctor.

(Phone rings)

Hey, Julian.

Still dealing with Fuckbrains here.

He's allergic to dogs apparently.

Ooh, I'm going to make everyone think I'm f*cking dying!

Yeah.

Yeah, it's right here.

f*ck off!

I'm on the phone.

I forgot where I was, okay?

Yeah.

I know exactly where that is, man.

I'll be there in 15 minutes.

Okay.

Hey, Ricky, can we stop and get this prescription filled on the way back to the park?

Yeah, we can.

On the way back to the park but right now we're not going back to the f*cking park.

Get the f*ck out to the car!

You've wasted enough of today already!

f*cking dog allergy!

What are you going to say you're dying from next?

Getting stanged by a f*cking bee?

I hope not.

How long are you going to be this f*cking colour?

You look ridiculous.

I'm really sorry, Ricky.

I don't know what's going on.

What are you doing going through the f*cking door first?

Jesus Christ!

Sorry!

Thanks, dude.

I can't believe he didn't have a f*cking drop left!

Not a f*cking drop, Ricky.

She's all in there somewhere.

Well, just FIY, there's no f*cking way we'll grow enough weed in 43 days without that sh*t.

We're f*cked!

Way to go, Jacob!

Sorry, dude.

Jacob, all you have is a f*cking allergy?

Yeah.

Well, kinda.

Doctor said I had some sort of unidentified element in my blood.

Unidentified element?

Okay, boys, there's nobody around.

It looks like the barrels are up in that first outbuilding up there, okay?

Cory, Jacob, I want you to grab the truck, go up and grab the f*cking barrel.

You got it.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Hang on!

Grab what truck?

My truck?

Yeah.

No, no, no.

I worked way too f*cking hard for that truck to let f*cking Red ET and Drewberry Dumb f*cking use the thing.

That's not happening.

Bubs, do you have insurance?

Yes, I have insurance.

I'm a legit businessman.

Well, circumstances like this is...

that's why you f*cking have insurance.

Oh, yeah, no, I remember reading that actually in the insurance policy.

Paragraph 1: "If you use your truck to steal something and it gets f*cked over while the crime is in progress, you are covered 100% with zero deductible." Bubs, if something get f*cked over, which is not gonna happen, we'll just f*cking burn the thing and report it stolen.

You can say there was tons of sh*t in the front, tons of sh*t in the back.

It's a win-win situation here, man.

And then you can buy a real f*cking truck.

A real t...

That is a f*cking real truck!

You know who uses great big trucks, Julian?

Who drives around in those?

Guys with little, tiny wieners.

That's who drives those.

Oh, wait a second, don't you have a ridiculously large jacked-up f*cking G.I.

Joemobile?

Real funny.

Real f*cking...

Go f*ck yourself!

Look, are we just gonna say to f*ck with everything?

You know, 'cause I'm quite happy to go out in the ocean and f*cking fish lobsters, man.

All right?

It's up to you.

Then maybe we can hook up at Christmas time or something.

'Cause I don't give a f*ck!

I know what you're doing, Julian.

Yeah?

Is it working?

(Sighing)

f*ck off.

All right, give him those keys.

Let's go, boys.

(Sighs)

Here, boys.

Do not f*ck this truck up!

Right on, boys.

(Keys clicking)

Cory, Cory!

That...

Come here.

Click that again.

(Clicking)

See the fire coming out of there?

It's a lighter.

(Soft grunt)

Don't be f*cking with it.

(Clicking continues)

(Long sigh)

If my truck gets f*cked up...

It's not going to get f*cked up.

No, let me finish.

If my truck gets f*cked up, I'm getting your truck.

I'm taking it and I'm selling it.

To somebody else with a tiny wiener.

(g*nshots)

Ted: Gentle now, Randy.

Gentle...

Just like that.

(g*nshots)

Ah!

Ah!

Jesus!

f*cking Christ!

What the hell are doing?

Well, I've never frigging fired one of these things before!

Come on, let's just go.

No, I've got to learn this, Ted.

I suggest you friggin wrap your friggin arms around me and show me how to hold this.

Unless you want the guys downtown to know some of the weird stuff that you like done to you.

(g*nshots continue)

Come on.

Yeah, yeah, okay, okay.

Widen your stance.

Straighten your arms.

Also stick your bum out a little.

Okay...

sh**t.

(g*nsh*t)

Ahh!

(Grunts of effort)

(Straining)

Jeez, man!

This is crazy!

It's like, I'm pushing, I'm pulling, it's not even locked.

Nothing!

(Grunting)

There we go.

Hey, I knew that.

All right.

No.

(Dull thuds)

No.

No.

Hey, Cory, this one sounds different.

Listen: it sounds full...

(Dull thuds)

(Hollow thuds)

...the rest sound empty.

You sure?

Yeah, listen.

(Tapping)

Hear the difference?

Well, what if this one...

(Hollow thuds)

is full and that's empty?

(Dull thud)

(Clattering)

See?

Full.

Right on, dude, let's do it.

Ho...ly sh*t.

(Grunt)

On three.

One...

One, two, three.

(Straining)

Sorry, I didn't really help.

One, two, three.

Cool.

(Grunt)

Hey, careful.

Okay.

Right.

That's easy, dude.

All right, just don't drop it.

I'm not saying there's no such thing as aliens.

All I'm saying is Jacob is not a f*cking alien.

Ricky, Ricky, did the doctor say that Jacob had an "unidentified element" in his blood?

That's what he said.

Yeah, because he's a f*cking alien, Julian.

He's a new species.

He's a Tall Red, descended from the Tall Whites, I guarantee you.

This mean my f*cking grampson's an alien?

Well, he's half.

Mo's not a f*cking alien!

Jacob's not a f*cking alien!

Yeah?

Yeah!

Who have you ever seen with four-foot-long arms, Julian, that turns red for no reason?

(Cellphone ringing)

Bubs, he looks like a f*cking alien, all right?

Ricky's NHL ball hockey camp.

How may I help you?

There's no date on the poster yet 'cause I haven't f*cking picked one.

'Cause I'm waiting to see if there's any interest first.

It says possible because I can't see in the future, okay?

They all say they want to come, what happens maybe they're on their way here and a f*cking earthquake derupts, it f*cking opens up, swallows the f*cking car, and they're never seen or heard from again?

It could happen, right?

Then I'd be a f*cking liar.

I'm not a liar.

My poster's not a f*cking liar.

Look, if you're interested, call me back in a few days.

If you're not, it doesn't really matter to me, I don't give a f*ck.

f*ck, people are stupid.

Ricky, that had to be the dumbest conversation I've ever heard in my life.

But no, you should've heard what she was saying!

He's a f*cking alien, Julian.

All right, boys...

I'm telling you.

What are you doing, man?

Hang on, boys!

Why do you always...

Whoo-oo!

Ricky!

Slow the f*ck down!

(Cackling)

Ricky, slow the f*ck down!

Aww, f*ck!

The brakes ain't working!

(Crash, clattering)

Man: What the f*ck!

Ricky: Jesus Christ!

f*cking Cory!

Julian: Back it up, Ricky!

Bubbles: Oh, f*cking nice one, Ricky.

Man: Holy sh*t!

What the f*ck, man!

A nice one.

f*ck's sakes.

Crashed into that guy's nice truck.

I hope my car's all right.

What the f*ck did you do to the truck?

It's just a little scratch.

f*ck!

I got the worst of it, you f*cking dummy.

What?

You heard me.

Take your tiny cock, get in your truck and f*ck off.

Huh!

You got the worst of it?

(Mirthless chuckle)

Julian: g*n!

Bubbles: Jesus Christ!

(g*nshots)

f*ck!

Boys, have I got to die in Reggie's junk yard because of a f*cking power slide gone wrong?

Can we all put down our g*ns and talk like normal f*cking human beings?

(g*nshots)

Oh, sh*t, dude, man, you're totally like my superhero, man.

Like, a real live superhero, man, you're my hero!

All red and sh*t, lifting the barrel over your head, man.

You totally did most of the work.

You know that, right?

I don't remember, man.

(Awkward chuckle)

I feel like I'm dying, dude.

Well, that's just it, man.

It's like, whatever we put our minds to, we can do together.

Do you know what I mean?

Even when we're dying, we get sh*t done, man.

Thanks, man.

You know what?

You complete me, man.

Thanks, man.

Hand me off.

Dunk.

Oh, sh...

Careful, man.

Sorry, dude.

Let me get...

Oh, sh*t, man.

Uh...

I think the barrel's gone.

What, you think it's gone or it's gone?

Dude, I think the barrel's gone.

We had a barrel in the back and the sh*t is gone.

Look.

Dude, I can't see.

We've got to go back and get it.

We've got to go back and get it.

Go, go, go, go...!

(g*nshots, dog barking)

Man: You got insurance?

Do I look f*cking dumb enough to buy insurance, you little sh*t vacuum?

(g*nshots)

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

What the f*ck is going on, you pigeon poking fucks?

You're scaring the sh*t out of my cust...

Put the f*cking weapons away!

Hey, Reg.

Reggie: Moose f*ckers!

I f*cking slid into this come gargler's dicktruck here and he f*cking lost it on me.

Look at the little tiny scratch.

Ah, Ricky...

Reggie: So, Dougie.

Nice.

Here's how this is going to go down.

You two guys are going to take your short, stumpy, hobbitty asses, get in this gigantic truck thing and get the f*ck off my yard.

Who the f*ck are you calling short, stubby, and hobbitty, you long-legged... arctic-blonde prick?

Go f*ck yourself, huh?

No, no, no, I think it's "go f*ck yourself", you know, 'cause the universe is not responsible for you two dipshits growing up to be mouse-diddlers, are they?

So lose the f*cking attitude and can we all just stop sh**ting at each other?

Now, you two, f*ck off!

(Quietly)

You f*ck off.

Bubbles: Short guys in big trucks.

There's nothing f*cking worse.

(Engine ignition)

Now what, pray tell, can I do for you turtle jerkers?

Can I just ask what the f*ck is up with you and all the animal sex f*cking references you use?

Well, it's kind of my thing, dude.

It's cool, man.

Julian : We need clones.

Lots of them.

Now you have my attention.

How much is a lot?

300 or 400?

(Laughing)

Yeah, that's good, Cheech and Chong.

What am I, f*cking Up In f*cking Smoke here?

Oh, f*ck's sakes, you can't do it?

Well, now, I didn't say that, you porpoise-raping piece of sh*t.

I'm Reggie!

Of course I can do it!

Right on!

He's the Reg, boys!

I told ya.

Bubbles: Yeah, but see, "porpoise-raping".

Why do you need to call him that?

It's kind of funny.

I mean, something in the ocean probably does r*pe them.

Octopusses, f*cking...

Octopusses don't r*pe porpoises!

starfish...

How the f*ck could a starfish r*pe a porpoise?

Salamanders probably do.

They don't live in the ocean, but...

Okay, dude, minor setback.

Not a big deal, man.

We just get it up there.

I've seen worse.

It's spilled a little, but...

Oh, f*ck, it's all over me.

Well, we'll just put it back in, dude.

Look.

It's a good thing you found it, man.

Hey, I don't remember it being so white and sticky and sh*t.

Let's get it back on the truck and get it back to the park.

(Straining)

Yeah, hoist it up, dude.

(Straining)

All right.

Ahh, f*ck...

okay.

You raise your end.

You go first.

Okay, argh...

Yeah, well, put it...

Oh, wait, no...

Okay...

sh*t.

(Indistinct muttering, grunting)

Ugh!

Oh, jeez, f*ck's sakes!

Okay, that's all right, dude.

Here, do it again.

Okay, up.

(Straining)

Yeah, I got it.

Let's go.

(Both panting)

Oh, perfect, dude.

Okay.

Yeah, man.

Make sure you strap it down good this time, eh?

Great idea.

All right.

Bubbles: There, Dougie, you take that.

Just feed them water for now, guys.

We're going to be over, we'll teach you exactly the formulas to use, all right?

She's got two.

There you go.

And remember, the bigger the plants, the more money you're going to make.

That's the last of 'em.

Right on.

This tomato plant don't look right.

That's 'cause it's a special, uh, tomato plant from Italy.

They grow a lot bigger there.

Oh, yeah.

It's a special tomato plant from Jamaica.

Huh?

It's still f*cked.

You're f*cked.

(Horn honking)

Speaking of f*cked.

Cory: What's up, dudes?

Ricky: It's about f*cking time!

Yo!

Boom!

Look at that.

Your f*cking brain's about the size of f*cking tiny little birds, you know that?

Yo, check it though.

Look.

What the f*ck does that say?

"Power braking fluid".

Power steering fluid!

It eats through brake lines.

You almost had us f*cking k*lled, you idiot!

Ricky.

What?

The nutrient company change the formula?

When did it start looking like vanilla pudding?

What the f*ck?

Why is it that colour?

What the f*ck is that?

Bubbles: Well, Ricky, don't...

That's not it!

What the f*ck is that?

Who the f*ck is this?

(Door opening, closing)

f*ck!

Who the f*ck...?

Man: Which one of you cocksuckers is Jacob?

(r*fle clicking)

There's no f*cking Jacob here there, flamingo tits!

I found this on the ground at my farm and I'm missing a very valuable barrel.

Julian: Whoopdee sh*t, you found something on the ground.

What the f*ck is it?

Hey, dude, that's your hospital bracelet, Jacob.

You are the son of a bitch that robbed me?

We're not f*cking around here, bud!

Where is it, boy?

Look, none of us robbed from you, okay?

So get in your truck and get the f*ck out of our park!

Oh, really, huh?

There it is, Harold.

Load it on the truck.

No, no, no.

You're not f*cking taking that.

We f*cking need it.

Oh, we are taking it!

And I'll sh**t every f*cking one of you if I have to!

We'll f*cking sh**t you too!

I f*cking love sh**ting people!

Bubbles: Ricky!

Ricky, just wait!

Come on!

Hang the f*ck on!

What if we just pay you for it, okay?

And we'll forget this ever happened.

Oh no, French guys, but you don't like the kind of people that got 50 grand lying around.

50 grand?

For what?

For that sh*t?

Well, that's its value when it's acquired by hand.

It's $280 at the f*cking hydroponics store, you criminal.

Wait a second.

Hand-acquired?

What the f*ck is this stuff?

Bull semen!

What the f*ck did you think it was?

Bull semen!

(Retching)

Man: Yeah, it's not just any ordinary bull semen.

This is grade A, 100% organic, hand-tossed liquid f*cking gold!

Okay.

(Violent retching)

Look, there's been a huge mix-up here.

I sent these two idiots out to pick up a f*cking barrel of fertilizer in a barn.

They obviously went to the wrong one 'cause they're dumb.

Ricky: We had no idea, man.

Just take it and get it the f*ck out of here, please!

Oh, we're going to take it out of here, all right.

Then we're going to come back with the cops and sort this out.

You don't need to call the cops!

We're giving it to you back, man.

It's down a couple of gallons and these tired old hands ain't going to be able to top it up.

Blisters healed just a few days ago.

Ricky: Stop f*cking talking about it!

What if I give you these guys to jack off your bulls?

They'll top it up, we'll be cool.

Uhh, I don't know.

It's, uh...

(Retching continues)

...it's pretty hard work, you know.

No, no, they can do it.

They can do it, believe me.

They've had lots of experience in that field.

I'll through a few crates of lobsters in there too.

Lobsters, huh?

Crates?

Uh...

Come on, man.

Yeah, well...

yeah, okay.

Oh, yes, I...

Yeah, yeah, okay.

Yeah, we got a deal, We got a deal.

All right.

Harold, load the load of load.

Cory, Jacob, help him with the load.

What?

Help him out with the f*cking load.

Ricky, are you all right?

Ricky!

Ricky!

Do not wipe your lips on me.

How big of a dollop did you put on your tongue?

(Groaning)

Oh, my f*ck.

Not f*cking right now.

What's the commotion here?

None of your f*cking business, Randy.

Julian, what the frig are you doing here?

You know the rules.

I want you to leave the park immediately.

Relax, Randy, I'm just visiting.

Right, Julian.

Just visiting.

Well, you better be.

I'm not afraid of you anymore, tough guy!

What the f*ck, Randy?

You've got one hour, Julian!

Ooooh!

When the f*ck did he start acting so hard wearing a shirt?

Bubbles: The same day he started wearing blue bags.

f*cking cop wannabe.

Barb & Lahey: (Imitating ducks quacking, laughing)

Hey, guys!

There's my little man.

Barb: Hi!

Thank you so much for looking after him.

Oh!

He's really growing attached to you guys.

Oh, my gosh, it's no problem.

We're growing attached to him.

He's so gorgeous!

(Chuckling)

I'm going to miss you so much next week when I'm away, but I will bring you back a lovely treat, okay?

Don't worry, little Mo.

Uncle Jimmy will still be around to play with you.

Yes, I will!

Mm!

Okay, Mo, wave bye.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

I'm coming with you.

Come on.

I'm going to get my little fix of Mo before I go.

Come on, let's go.

(Chuckling)

See you, Mo.

Say bye.

Say, "Bye, Uncle Jimmy!" Randy: Hey, guys.

Hey, Randy.

Hey, Mo, how's it going, buddy?

Say hi.

Randy: Good to see ya.

We've got to take Julian and Ricky down, sir.

Julian?

Yeah, he was just here.

What?

There were two farmers with g*ns, a barrel of something big and expensive.

Something big is going down.

You could talk to Barb, convince her to let Julian move back to the park and then we could take them all down at once.

It's not going to happen, Randy.

Oh, you get to decide just like that, do you?

Yeah...

Well, maybe...

maybe I'll decide then this isn't going to happen either.

Randy, Randy, Randy, Randy, come on now.

Just relax, bud.

Okay, we'll talk.

Okay?

Okay.

You go in and start supper.

I'll clean up.

Thanks for listening, sir.

(Sigh)

My sexy Julian back in the park, huh?

This is pretty much it, Julian.

Everything comes in there, you know.

Sliced and diced; puréed and crushed; over to the spiceland for my proprietary blend.

She gets cooked off in the boiler, goes in there, pumped up into the saucinator, out into the bottle and the capping department.

It's a pretty f*cking streamlined operation.

No, man, it's pretty f*cking impressive.

No, I know.

So, what's the profit margin on each f*cking jar?

(Sigh)

You see, profit margin...

You've got to know that, man.

I know.

And you know all that stuff and that's why you should be living here at the park with me.

(Sigh)

Just knowing words like that, I'd probably make more money.

I know, but I can't, okay?

I've got a good thing going on at the container, man.

It's peaceful out there.

There's no stress on the ocean, man, it's beautiful.

(Door opening)

Ricky: Hey, boys.

Hey, Ricky.

Bubs, I need a little favour.

Coolnow obviously can't be around Jacob any more and...

Stop right there, Ricky.

Don't say another word.

You tell Jacob to put him on a spaceship and they can fly up to Jacob's house at the North Star.

He's not staying here.

Trin and Mo can't move 'cause of a f*cking puppy dog, and we can't get rid of him, Mo loves the little bastard.

Well, I'm putting my foot down, Ricky, 100%.

There's two things that dogs don't mix with: kitties and Bubbles.

Oh, like the...

the ones you blow with bubble gum?

No!

Me, Bubbles.

Me.

Why didn't you say "me"?

Because I sometimes refer to myself in the third person.

It's a thing I do.

That's confusing.

Anyway, it's only for a little while.

It's nothing big deal, right?

One day or so.

He's not staying, Ricky...

I know.

I've got to say good night to Mo, hold him for a minute.

Ricky!

Thanks, buddy.

Love ya.

You're a good friend.

(Heavy sigh)

This is unbelievable.

Look at this now: bull semen, f*cking dope clones, sh**t-outs, and now this, me looking after a f*cking wrangley old mutt.

It looks a hotdog with hair on it.

Bubs, things got a little fucky today, but you've got to be positive.

How good is it to have all of us back together again, huh?

Huh?

I don't know.

Oh, come on, man.

Scale of one to ten, how good does it feel?

Come on, tiddle-iddle-iddle- iddle-iddle!

Mmm.

Come on.

Mm...

a million billion.

That's how I feel.

Hey, little buddy.

He's f*cking cute, man.

He's not cute.

He's got a big, long nose.

Nobody likes that.

(Lips smacking)

Nobody likes those cute little ears and little tongue.

He's f*cking cute, man.

I don't care what you say.

(Theme music)

(Seabirds squawking)

Fish: f*ck!

f*ck!

f*ck off!

f*ck!... f*ck off!

Jesus Christ!

(Whisper)

f*ck.

(Light clicks off)

f*ck off.