01x07 - The Treehouse That Punky Built

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Punky Brewster". Aired: February 2021 to present.*
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The sequel to the original, now a single mother Punky meets a girl who reminds her of her younger self.
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01x07 - The Treehouse That Punky Built

Post by bunniefuu »

Just so you know,
I take no joy in b*ating you.

That's very generous.

That's just how I roll,
you know, I'm a nice guy.

Boom! You're dead!

Whoo! In your face.

♪ Everybody sing you suck ♪

♪ You suck ♪

♪ You suck ♪

Seriously? Nothing?

Man, it's no fun being
a sore winner with you.

Would you excuse me a moment?

[LIGHT MUSIC]

♪♪

Son of a [BLEEP]!

[BLEEP] dumb [BLEEP].

Diego is a big stupid [BLEEP]

with a big stupid butt!

[BLEEP], [BLEEP]!

[SIGHS] Now, where were we?

I see you've renamed my
avatar Loser Numero Uno?

Very original.

Would you excuse me a moment?

♪♪

Why can't you lose like a normal person?

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Hey, hey! ♪

- ♪ Every time I ♪
- ♪ Hey, hey! ♪

♪ Turn around ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey! ♪

- Do you believe in aliens?
- Uh-huh.

What do they do with
all the floor hair at barbershops?

Eh, don't know.

Is cereal a soup?

Izzy, those are really great questions,

but I have so much work to do.

But I'm bored, and I can't go in my room

'cause Hannah's friends are over

and all they ever talk about is "vibes."

So basic.

What about your friend
Maya from upstairs?

Her mom thinks kale is a snack.

Can't you take a break?

I'd love to hang out with you,

but I've got to get
these photos in today.

Diego, why don't you take Izzy
to the tree house to play?

Are you asking me or telling me?

Both.

Well, then, come on, Izzy,
I have no choice in the matter.

I know exactly what we can do...

Tea party!

Oh, boy!

This isn't even tea.

It's not about the tea.

It's about the accents,

the drama, and the hats.

Now, do you wanna be Sir Jingles
or Lady Feather Hat?

Well, Lady Feather Hat,

Sir Nigel told Lady Booty that
you would make a fine king,

which is why I poisoned your tea.

What?

[SIGHS] Part of the drama. Go with it.

Ah, but I switched cups
when you weren't looking.

So it is you who has the poisoned tea.

[GASPS] How dare you?

[DRAMATIC GROANS AND GRUNTS]

[GAGS, COUGHS]

[INHALES, COUGHS]

[BLEEP], [BLEEP],

[BLEEP].

Chicken [BLEEP] butt.

[BLEEP] fat jerk.

[WEAKLY] Hi.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

This is my safe space for cursing.

Let's never speak of this again.

Fancy a nice cuppa?

No, thanks.

Too bad, I'd hate for your mum

to hear about your foul mouthery.

I'd love a spot of tea.

Cheerio!

Let me get you a hat.

What's this?

Our initials.

Mom and aunt Cherie's
are the oldest, then Dad's.

We added ours once we were
allowed to use knives.

Never been anywhere long
enough to vandalize it.

- Aah!
- Holy [BLEEP]!

Help me!

It's not working, I'm stuck.

I'll dash off and get mum!

Why are you pretending
to jump on a horse?

Just go.

Izzy, don't panic.

Diego will catch you
if you fall through.

If I what?

I'm supposed to what?

You've seen him play baseball, right?

It's okay, I've got you. [GRUNTS]

You okay?

Yeah, but this tea party
is way too dramatic.

Looks like some of the wood is rotted.

It's not safe to play up here right now.

I guess I'll have to
find another place to...

Uh, do my Buddhist chants.

This place needs some serious repairs.

Gotta say, she's held up pretty well

for being built by a
bunch of seven-year-olds.

We should get down.

I felt like I was getting judgey vibes

from Mr. Cortez during debate.

Pretty sure it's his adult braces.

Hey, guys. I'm here to pick you up.

Are you ready to vamos?

Thanks, Dad, just a few more minutes?

Yeah, sure. I'll sit...

[GROANS]

At that table right over here.

Honestly, Hannah, your debate was fire.

Oh, did you have a big debate today?

I'm kinda just trying to talk
to Bri and Madison right now.

Sorry. Lame dad right here, shutting up.

Let's take a selfie.

Oh, my God, I have spinach in my teeth!

Why didn't you guys tell me?

We wanted to,
but it was really disgusting,

and didn't wanna make you feel bad.

Wait.

Did I have this in my
teeth during debate?

Maybe...

I would've rather you
guys told me right away,

even if it was embarrassing.

You're right.

Real friends should always
be honest with each other.

[COUGHING] Bad idea!

Let's make an honesty pact.

- Yeah.
- Great idea.

All right, let me just jump in here.

Sometimes total honesty
is not the best idea.

Some things call for
situational honesty.

What's that?

Where you don't tell the whole truth.

- Okay, Boomer.
- Hey, I'm not a Boomer.

Then what are you?

You're way too old to be a millennial.

[HUFFS] Gen X.

The independent ones.

Kind of the lone wolf. We're cool!

Okay, well,
Gen Zers develop emotional maturity

earlier than you guys did,
so I'm pretty sure

we can handle an honesty pact.

- Let's do it.
- Okay.

From this moment on,

we promise to be % honest

with each other, no matter what.

- No matter what.
- No matter what.

Okay, okay, all I'm saying
is the one time I was honest

with not liking Jeff Tweedy's
shirt before a show,

all hell broke loose.

I could have been in Wilco.

What's Wilco?

I'm gonna go wait in the car.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

♪♪

Hey, Hannah. How was school?

How was your day? Mmm, brain freeze.

Oh, this was on the door.

Oh, my God.

The city's tearing down the tree house.

They're saying it's
dangerous and uninhabitable.

What's that?

Mom, Izzy fell through the floor.

And she was having the time
of her life when it happened.

Look, it had a good run,

but maybe it's time to let it go.

Let it go?

The tree house is
basically a family member.

I was Izzy's age when we built it.

She hasn't even had
a chance to enjoy it.

So what are you gonna do?

I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.

First, I'm gonna call Cherie

and then I'm gonna finish this pint.

Hey, Cherie, I have a super
fun idea for a girls' day.

You know what's a fun girls' day?

A booze cruise.

Thanks for doing construction
work with me all day.

I expect to be paid time and a half.

Oh, would gummy bears work?

Ooh-hoo gimme!

I haven't had candy in so long

because Lauren is the sugar police,

and don't try arguing with an attorney,

'cause you won't win.

She's lucky she's cute.

Remember when we first built this?

Everyone was here, Henry,

your grandma, Margo, Allen,

even our teacher Mike.

I remember you
tricking us into building it,

but it was worth it.

Building the tree
house was the first time

I actually felt like I lived here.

- We grew up in it.
- So did my kids.

That's what I want for Izzy.

I remember we were right here

when Mike and I decided to
go looking for our moms.

He found his.

And now you found yours, sort of.

Have you called her back yet?

I keep almost calling her,

but I can't.

It's like I go right
back to being a kid.

What if I let her in and...

she abandons me all over again?

But you've wondered about her
ever since I've known you,

and you don't owe this to her.

You owe it to yourself.

You're not a little girl anymore.

You are so much stronger,

and you'll know when the time is right.

I am so happy that I have you.

Always.

Chew fast. Here she comes.

Great news. Tree house saved.

You're amazing.

It's no biggie.

I just filed an injunction
with City Hall.

You have days to repair it.

Problem solved.

- But also, I'm amazing.
- [LAUGHS]

- My hero.
- Aw.

What's in your mouth?

Nothing.

Honestly, I don't like
the color yellow, like, at all.

Honestly, I never knew that about you.

Oh, this honesty pact is going great.

Hey, girls, check me out.

I am an Instagram baddie now.

I just posted my first makeup tutorial.

It's how to get the perfect brow.

Do you guys think people will like it?

Oh, my, um... great aunt just texted me.

Oh, what was that, Mikey?

Mikey?

Good one! Catch you later.

Guys, be honest.

Is it-is it that bad?

- Yeah.
- No.

You think it's bad?

Um, I think you might

just need to practice a little more

before you post your next video.

I love it. Seriously.

I was just trying to honor our pact.

Well, honestly,
I think you're being mean.

Honestly, I panicked.

Yay, honesty pact.

Too late, Madison!

[DISTANTLY] Testing, testing.

- Son of a biscuit eater...
- Do you hear that?

Hear what?

Is it the sound of me
ruining my friend's life

over and over again in my head?

Because that's all I can hear.

[MUTTERS, BLEEP, DARN, BLEEP]

Don't blame our [BLEEP] tea...

- Dude.
- What are you doing in there?

[SIGHS] I need a new cursing space.

What am I supposed to do?

Swear on the streets like an animal?

All right, party time's over.

Put on your work clothes and
let's go work on the tree house.

- No way.
- Ugh.

But it's the tree house.

You guys used to love playing in there.

And Izzy is prime
tree house playing age.

Sorry, Mom. We grew out of it.

Diego, hand me that box of Kleenex.

You don't have to cry, Mom.

I'm not gonna cry.

I'm gonna throw it at you.

I'll help you with the tree house.

Oh, Izzy, I knew you'd come through.

Go get some tools.

I'm more of an idea person.

I'll go draw up some plans.

Well, at least one of you
guys is excited about it.

You're not gonna guilt us into this.

Dang it!

♪♪

I can't believe the
kids don't want to help

with the tree house,
not even for Izzy's sake.

It's like all they want to do
is be on their phones dancing.

I want to warn you,
you're starting to sound like

a little like an angry
townie from "Footloose."

I thought this was special to them.

It's still special to us.

Hey, where's the plank
with our initials in it?

Oh, don't worry.
That is not going anywhere.

I guess we all have good memories here.

Like the first time you brought me over

to introduce me to Henry,
and then we snuck up there.

Story time's over.

I used to call it the love shack.

Stop!

Okay, okay, look,

it does mean a lot to me.

The first time Hannah was old enough

to realize I was going on tour,
she stole my guitar

and hid up there so I wouldn't leave.

It still breaks my heart.

Aw, that is so sweet.

[SAW WHIRRING]

You know what else is sweet?

The perfect -degree miter cut.

Is it wrong that I find that attractive?

I have the plans for
the tree house remodel.

Oh, are those pandas?

Yes, but not real ones.

Okay. Picture this.


Over here, a karaoke machine,
and right there,

a charging station,
and in this corner right here,

a TikTok dance area. Whoo!

These are really cool ideas,

but the whole point of the
tree house is to be outside,

away from our screens,
using our imaginations.

Don't worry, my friends
and I loved it, and so will you.

Okay. I trust you.

But think about the pandas.

I should have lied.

Bri hasn't spoken to me since.

I was only trying to be a good friend.

I mean, what was I supposed to do?

I don't care.

Can you please stop using me
as your replacement friend?

I'm not.

Then stop calling me Madison.

But she's not talking to me either.

Testing, testing, Flaming hot [BLEEP].

Oh, hello.

I can't believe you're
cursing under there.

I thought you were afraid of spiders.

What?

You see what I have
to deal with, Madison?

Not yet.

Now!

What do you think, Izzy?

It's really... awesome

how you made it exactly the same.

Right?

Yeah. Uh, it's like

a phone update where you
can't tell what changed.

I can't wait to hang out in it later.

Not now?

We're playing a game inside,

and I kinda wanted to finish that.

Thanks, Punky, I really like it.

Is it just me,

or does Izzy not seem
thrilled about this place?

Ugh. I was trying to get
out of the honesty game.

But, um, no, she hates it.

She hates it? But I did it for her.

Are you sure about that?

Okay, look, she didn't tell you because

she didn't want to hurt your feelings.

You're right. Thanks for being honest.

You're not mad at me?

No. I'm a little mad at myself.

This whole time, I convinced myself

that I was rebuilding
the tree house for Izzy

when really, I was doing it for me.

Well, duh.

Okay, you can stop being honest now.

Oh, my God, I get it.

I'm no longer the tree house.

I'm the tree.

I was with you until the tree part.

Henry was the foundation for
me to build my dreams on.

He was my tree.

Now, I get to be the tree for Izzy.

I am the tree!

Mm, somebody's been sniffing
too many paint fumes.

Who wants some fresh-baked cookies?

Where are the cookies?

There are no cookies.

- We're gonna have a family meeting.
- What's going on?

Go back. It's a trap.

We are fixing up the tree house again.

- Ugh.
- We?

The woman is obsessed with tree houses.

It's not for me.

This time, we're doing it the Izzy way.

Okay. I'm in.

Izzy deserves to love
it as much as we did.

And, uh, all my friends hate
me right now, so I'm available.

Yeah, we had some
pretty good times up there.

The tree house is where I
first played truth or dare.

Yeah, I was alone, so it was
kind of boring, but still.

Okay, your dad and Emily took Izzy

on a hot dog tour of Chicago,

so we only have a few hours.

I have seen that girl eat a hot dog.

We have less time than you think.

- Hey.
- Bri?

We'll just see you downstairs.

Hey.

Hey.

I owe you an apology.

No, I-I should apologize to you.

I never should have
said that. Your video...

Got a lot of honest comments,

a lot harsher than yours.

Somebody said that my
eyebrows looked like slugs.

No!

Maybe baby slugs.

Even though it hurt to hear it,

you were my only friend that
was actually honest with me.

I never meant to hurt your feelings.

I was just trying to protect you.

I know, and it's important that
we're open with each other.

So from here on out,
we will stick to the promise...

Let's not do the honesty pact.

Oh, thank God.

If this is another hot dog,

I'm gonna need at least
ten minutes and a bucket.

[SCREAMS] This is for me?

This tree house is all Izzy.

Great job on the re-remodel.

Now I can honestly say that
I fixed it up for Izzy.

I just needed to let go.

It's everything I wanted.

Diego, we're gonna have the
best tea parties up here.

Pshh. What?

And Daniel,
I got you a special cursing pillow,

but it's not a travel pillow,
so curse responsibly.

[MUFFLED] Testing, testing.

It's perfect.

[MUFFLED] Chicken butt!

So I have to confess something.

You were right.

Honesty is not always the best policy.

So the honesty pact didn't go too well?

- Oh, it was a suckfest.
- Ye-ha-ha-ha-es!

Oh, that's just a parenting win.

You realize your parenting win
was telling me not to be honest?

Yes, I do. Father of the Year.

A TikTok dance area,

changing station, Karaoke machine,

no holes?

You even got me a panda.

It's not a real one.

It's a dream come true!

I love it so much.

Thank you for fixing up
the tree house for me.

There's one more thing for you to do.

Some families have family trees.

We have a family tree house.

Would you like to add your name?

You want me to?

Now it's your turn to
make new memories here.

I know what I want my first one to be.

- [PHARRELL WILLIAMS' "HAPPY"]
- ♪ Because I'm happy ♪

♪ Clap along if you feel
like a room without a roof ♪

- ♪ Because I'm happy ♪
- ♪ Clap along if you feel ♪

♪ Like happiness is the truth ♪

- ♪ Because I'm happy ♪
- ♪ Clap along ♪

♪ If you know what happiness is to you ♪

You're not a little girl anymore.

You're a tree.

You can do this.

You've reached Susan. Leave a message.

Hey, Mom.

I mean, Susan.

I don't know what to call you.

Both feel weird.

I'll go with something neutral,
like Jeff.

I don't know why I said that.

Sorry about that last message.

Let's just go ahead and
pretend it didn't happen.

I'm talking about the message,

not the abandoning me
in a parking lot thing.

Okay, I ruined that one.
So I'm just gonna...

Uh, this isn't going well, uh...

I'm gonna hang up now.
Uh, it's Punky, by the way.

Leave a message.

It's me again. Anyway, Jeff,

I'm not good with this stuff.

I mean, duh.

How many messages have I left you?
Like a million?

I'm just gonna start over again.

[LING RINGING]

This mailbox is full.

Oh, thank God.
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