01x20 - Song-a-Rooney

[bunniefuu]

Ah, Dad, sit down.

They're about to stream my music video worldwide.

Sorry, Liv, just looking for a place to sit.

Ooh, here.

Next month, I start filming the blockbuster movie "Space Werewolves.

" I'm using that buzz to launch my music career, so that means making some really big changes.

I got a new manager and new boots.

The manager's the best part.

But these boots! We met with the music industry's top managers.

We all decided to hire Becky Bicklehoff.

She represents the biggest names in music today.

We've never heard of any of them, but to be fair, the last record we bought was A record.

I so hope you guys like this.

Becky told me to trust her, but I'm a little worried.

I wasn't completely sold on this song.

And what we sh*t was so weird.

Oh, look look.

It's on.

Strawberry or vanilla? Swirl! "'Sup" Brain freeze! Was that as terrible as I think it was? Did you think that was the worst thing ever? - I did.

- Then yes.

Ugh! My stupid video is up to four million hits.

Isn't four million views a good thing? No.

Mom, I want people to take me seriously as a singer.

This walk down wack-a-doodle Lane is gonna turn me into the "froyoyolo" girl.

Oh, honey, no one's gonna call you the froyoyolo girl.

There's the froyoyolo girl.

See?! Liv, I was just down at the froyo shop.

That place is blowing up since you sh*t your video there.

They let me cut the line 'cause I'm the froyoyolo girl's brother.

Oh, finally! My new manager, Becky Bicklehoff, is here to make this horrible nightmare end.

Honey, do you want us to stick around? Hmm no, I think I'm okay, mom.

Bitterness is an ugly flavor on you, Liv.

Becky, hi.

Thank you so much for coming all the way from Hollywood.

Are you kidding me? Your video's my favorite thing on earth right now.

I love it so much it makes me angry.

Okay, so, um, listen.

I love the exposure, but it's just not really the image that I want to put out there.

You know, I want people to take my music seriously.

And I wanted to be Hilary Clinton, but here we are.

So a week from tonight, we're doing a live streaming Internet performance.

Ah! Ooh.

That sounds exciting.

What does that mean? It's an intimate concert digital performance.

Oh! What does that mean? You'll sing "froyoyolo" live from the little yogurt store where it all began.

Millions of people will watch around the world.

Fro-no, she didn't, live.

" Froyo?! No no no! Becky, I have to sing a different song.

You cr*ck me up.

You've got a hit! Oh, on your first hit, you milk it.

When you drop your tenth hit, then you can do whatever you want.

Change your name to a symbol.

Buzz your hair off.

Wear a suit made of lobsters.

- Hey, guys.

- Morning, honey.

Oh, what's this? "If you held up two diamonds in the mirror, you'd be looking at three of most precious things in the world.

Love, Pete.

" You! People, I'm still eating over here.

Pete, it's not even a special occas Wait, is it a special occasion?! No no no, care bear.

I just wanted to show you that I love you every day of the year.

That is so romantic.

Can you believe your father is gonna leave me a love note every day of the year? I'm gonna go call my mom and tell her that she has always been wrong about you.

You really stepped in it, Romeo.

It took me three weeks to come up with that note.

If I don't come up with another one, she's gonna k*ll me, isn't she? If you held up two dead rats in the mirror, you'd be looking at three of the most dead things in the world.

Do you guys have to do that every time someone walks in? Have to or get to, man? It's called peppy rainbow mode.

We're building a magical bridge to your froyo dreams.

So what can I get you, mads? Uh, some of your time, Mr.

newly-promoted-manager-slash-boyfriend.

It's just that you've been working so much and I'm leaving for junior Olympics basketball soon Don't remind me.

I already miss you.

Aww, love.

Blech! Anyway, I wish I could work less, but ever since they sh*t Liv's video here, it's been a little crazy.

Yeah.

And with her concert coming up, we'll barely get to see each other Unless you worked here.

I was gonna suggest that you quit, but I like this so much better.

Could I really get paid to hang out with my boyfriend? Let me just check with the manager.

You're hired.

Guess who got a j-o-b, so she can hang with the d-I-g?! Don't.

I'm in a mood.

Why? What's wrong? Suddenly, I'm a bubble gum pop princess and that's only gonna get worse if I have to sing "froyoyolo" at my Internet concert.

Don't you have to sing that song? I mean, the concert is called "froyoyolo: Fro-no, she didn't, live.

" Right.

I know, which is why I am secretly writing my own song that is going to show everyone the kind of artist that I want to be.

And I'm gonna sing that instead.

That's really brave.

How's that going for you? Well, I've been at it for hours and all I have done is draw this hand-Turkey! Please don't do the dramatic bed flop.

What am I gonna do? Liv, just write what you're feeling.

Okay, no, that is not nearly as easy as you're making it sound.

Have you ever tried writing down your feelings? No.

- Yes.

- What? - What - Spill! So I may or may not have a secret poetry journal.

But you can't tell anyone.

You have a poetry journal? And it's sparkly?! Who are you? Gimme gimme gimme.

No no no no.

No.

You can't look.

It's private.

But, um, if I can do it, you can do it.

And inspiration is everywhere.

Maddie had inspired me inspired me to read her journal.

Guess what I found when I unrolled my yoga mat this morning.

Day two in a year of romance.

"If you were Thursday, I'd want every day to be Thursday.

" Pete, how do you come up with this stuff? How do I not? Thank you, honey.

Thank you, son.

How do you come up with this stuff? Lovey dovey lizard.

I haven't played with her since I was two.

I forgot that she could do this.

If you were Thursday, I'd want every day to be Thursday.

Dad's giving me a dollar for every love note I write.

And this stupid thing says a million stupid things.

I'm gonna be stupid rich.

This is so great.

I love working with you.

Me too times two.

You guys are gross.

- Um, Maddie? - Yeah.

You were supposed to sing.

Oh, sorry, "boss.

" I love being able to do that Call you my "boss.

" Yeah, first of all, I'm not your "boss.

" I'm your boss.

I need you to pep up your rainbow.

Don't get me wrong.

I love that you work here.

I love working here.

I hate working here! But it would break his heart if I told him, so I hate her working here! But it would break her heart if I told her, so So you want to slice mangos with me? I thought you'd never ask.

"If your love were my hair, I'd never cut it.

" You oh, you! If your love were my hair, I'd never cut it.

Ka-Ching.

Our love has no expiration date.

Dollar bill, y'all.

If you're my number one, let me be your number two.

Oh! Yay, you're finally home.

I've been dying to see you.

Ooh, totally get that.

Too much alone time with Joey? Yes, that.

But also, you were right.

I found some inspiration.

It took me a couple days, but I'm really proud of it.

I wrote a song.

Oh, Liv, that's great.

I told you inspiration was everywhere.

What'd you write about? About how much you missed me when I went away to Hollywood.

Uh Why is it about my feelings? Because yours were already written down.

Yay-sies! I found a poem in your journal and I set it to music.

You read my journal?! And that is why I write my journal in elfish.

Okay, Maddie, I'm sorry I read your journal, but before you get all upset no, Liv, there's no before.

I'm upset! Oh, those are my own private thoughts.

Right, they were, but now they're a bouncy memorable chorus with an interesting bridge.

I want to sing it at my concert so that people can know the real me.

Okay, but it's not the real you.

It's the real me! That you stole.

Yeah, Liv.

Who d*ed and made you luthien tinuviel? Famous elf princess.

Oh, come on, don't you people read? Apparently, Liv does.

Other people's journals.

- You can't use that song.

- Wha? Maddie, you can't just put sparkles on something and expect me not to touch it! I'm so glad that I can help you build a magical rainbow to your froyo dream! Have a peppy day! I am the peppiest rainbow! I'm dead inside.

- Uh, Maddie.

- Yeah.

Working with you is Is so great.

So great.

- Yeah, so you're fired.

- Um, I quit.

Yay! Yes! Oh, sure, now you're peppy.

I do wish we could spend more time together before I leave though.

I guess I could quit my ukulele class.

You would do that for me? Of course.

After you leave, I can't imagine myself saying, "I wish I'd spent more time with my ukulele.

" Big mistake, man.

I quit the bagpipes for a guy.

Regret it every day.

"Sunrise, you Sunset the perfect day.

" Oh, Pete, just when I think you can't top yourself, you do.

Well, when you have the most beautiful woman in the world as inspiration, the words just they just Well, you know.

Just so surprising 'cause you never did stuff like this when we were dating or when I was pregnant with the twins or when Parker was two.

And I gave him this! Why are you holding up some stupid lizard? Oh, don't play dumb.

I found your little cupid while I was cleaning.

"Sunrise, you, sunset hee-hee the perfect day.

" I paid you for original material.

You were paying him?! Well, yeah, but I didn't know he was ripping off a lizard.

Pete Rooney, you need to say something romantic to me right now.

Don't look at him.

Um I like your face.

Really? At least you know he wrote it.

This place is electric, man.

All right, Liv.

The live stream starts in 30 seconds.

And there're millions of people waiting to watch.

- Aah.

- It's froyo time.

Becky, this just really doesn't feel right to me.

Of course it doesn't.

Now it's froyo time! Okay.

Maddie said I couldn't sing her song, which meant that I had to sing "froyoyolo," choke back my tears, and then Sing the Spanish version.

No, it's bad in any language.

Um, just one second, ladies and gentlemen.

What are you doing? Yeah, what are you doing? Liv, sing your hit.

No.

Sing the song that you wrote from my poem.

Seriously? Wait, Maddie, I stole that.

But, Liv, I wrote that poem about you, which kind of makes it yours too.

I don't know what to say.

Don't say it.

Sing it.

And when you sing it, ah, kid, you sing it loud.

She caved! Play the other track.

So instead of singing "froyoyolo," I have decided to sing from the heart, the one that I share with my twin sister.

This is gonna be called "count me in.

" I was wrong to judge you, Pete.

Plagiarism can be beautiful.

So, Becky, I know you're upset, but Are you kidding me?! I love "count me in.

" - You do? - Absolutely.

Froyo is out.

Loving your sister is in.

I haven't talked to mine in 20 years and I just texted her.

Oh.

Dang it.

She needs money.

Someday, I'm gonna write a song about you, bro.

Count me out.

Good news, look! "Count me in" is up to 14 million views.

No one's even playing "froyoyolo" anymore.

Yeah, well, that's not exactly true.

Watch.

No!