02x17 - Prom-a-Rooney

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Liv and Maddie". Aired: July 2013 to June 2016.*
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Follows Identical twins as they navigate life which includes dealing with their parents that work at their high school.
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02x17 - Prom-a-Rooney

Post by bunniefuu »

Um ahem!

Hey, Willow.

You, uh, catching butterflies?

Nope.

Catching Joeys.

And when I nab him, I'm asking him to prom.

Okay, but if you catch him in a net, isn't that really, like, not asking him?

We have a complicated relationship.

So, uh, who are you going with?

My microphone.

I'm performing a song at prom, so No way!

That's so cool!

Thank you.

Yeah.

I'm still writing it, though, so I just feel like having a date would be a distraction.

I got you, Joey!

Sorry, Jeffrey.

Move along.

Move along.

Okay, Willow Willow.

Will You can't just throw a net around and expect to catch a guy you like.

Nice welcome for the new kid.

Holden!

Holden Dippledorf is my super-cute neighbor who goes to a different school.

Because if I didn't, you should know that he's super cute.

I'm sorry.

Um, Willow, this is my neighbor Holden.

He is super cu cool.

Nice to meet you, super cu ool Holden.

Um, so, what are you doing at Ridgewood?

Oh, well, my boarding school was built over an old copper mine, which is now a new sinkhole.

With a boarding school in it.

Ah, you're going to you're going to Ridgewood now!

Ha ha!

You're gonna be with me every you're gonna be with us every day.

Well Yeah, so, um I have to check in at the office, which is - Oh, it's that way.

- This way.

- This way - That way.

- It's this way.

- Okay.

Bye!

What?

You like him!

No, I don't.

Whoa, is that Joey?

He's mine!

Hey, Joey, I have an idea I think you gonna like.

It's about our swan boat.

I have no interest in that worthless piece of whimsical pine.

Last new year's, Parker and I got our very own swan boat.

But it was winter, so instead of this We got this.

Lost a toe that night.

Down to ten, just like everybody else.

No, hear me out.

We soup-up Swanny with tires and an engine, and we'll have an amphibious swan boat for all seasons.

Honk if you love swan boats.

Honk!

Honk!

Did you just leave me hanging with a solo honk?

I'm sorry, Parker.

I just can't look at the swan boat anymore.

The day the pedals broke off and we had to use my underpants as a sail, the dream d*ed.

I'm just not a honk man anymore, Bud.

Mark my words, you will honk again!

Mom, Joey won't honk with me!

I am helping Maddie pick out her prom dress.

Mom, I'm not going to prom.

I mean, you can't go without a date, and it's not like I'm gonna go with anyone else at our school.

Well Momma found a way for you to go.

I get it.

Time to lint-roll my tux.

Actually, I invited cousin Craig to be your date.

You did what?

Okay, no.

Mom, there is no way that I'm going to the prom with crusty Craig.

Why do you call him crusty Craig?

Do you think there's a good reason to be called crusty?

That I am letting my daughter miss her prom.

Crusty Craig is coming all the way from Muncie, Indiana.

I am your mother, you are going, and that is that!

Now, let's talk about these dresses.

Well, the blue works with her skin tone, but I'd wear a wrap with it.

Something understated.

I live with too many girls.

Hey, Liv.

Thanks for showing me around yesterday.

Oh.

Yeah.

I mean, once you know which water fountains spray up your nose, Ridgewood's pretty much a cakewalk.

A friendly face doesn't hurt, either.

Art sculpture coming through!

Hey!

Andie, this is Holden.

He is super cu he's new.

He's super new here.

Your art project reminds me of a Sebastian Oliver sculpture.

Thanks!

Oliver's my favorite.

Seriously?

Mine, too.

Hey, you should help us out on the prom decorating committee.

Come on, Holden.

Get involved with your new school.

Come on, Holden.

Get involved with me.

I don't know.

Uh, let me check my schedule.

Yep, that's what I thought.

Completely empty, since I know absolutely nobody else.

Cool.

Lonely boy is in.

Great.

Well, we meet after school tomorrow.

And, hey, if you don't show up, I know where you live.

Ha ha.

Move it or lose it, people!

Joey!

So, Craig should be here any minute.

I made some "momma's sorry" cookies to apologize.

Um, by "made" did you mean "opened the bag?" You know, aunt Melanie said that Craig sort of reinvented himself this summer.

- Oh.

- Oh.

Yeah.

You're probably right.

I mean, how bad could Craig possibly be?

Behold my arrival!

Craig.

I haven't been Craig since I went to magic camp.

Now I am known as krahgg the insidious.

With my trusty companion Manolo the crow.

Illusion!

Where's my crow?

Manolo!

This is a strange neighborhood!

And it just got stranger.

Well, this is awkward.

Or is it Amazing?

Nope, it's awkward.

Krahgg the insidious will break free and blow your minds!

In just one more minute.

Craig, it's been, like, 15 minutes.

It's krahgg.

All right, I've had just about enough of this.

Illusion!

Hey, what are the rules?

Can you punch a cousin or is it just brothers and evil clowns?

I have your "baaahg," krahgg.

Do not peek!

It holds the tools of my trade.

The dark art of magic!

Ha ha ha ha!

I am levitating as we speak!

It's just you're not, though.

Really?

What if I'm levitating the house and all it contains with me so you just can't tell?

With crazy Craig by Maddie's side at the prom, no other boy's gonna want to get near her.

Craig's my boy.

It's pronounced Kra Sorry, it's just too much smoke.

It's krahgg The insidious.

Greetings, cousins!

Which one of you has the courage to step into my box and disappear Into the great beyond?

Sounds dumb.

I just came to get grapes.

Joey!

There you are!

Krahgg, make me disappear!

Aw, come on!

Joey, quit goofing around.

Illusion!

Illusion!

Joey!

Uh, hey, Willow.

What's happening?

Um, I was wondering if you'd accompany me to the prom?

I got the tickets, the dress and enough love in my heart for us both.

Uh Uh This tension is insidious.

Like I, krahgg oh, stuff it, creep boy!

I'm waiting, Joey.

Sorry, Willow, Joey's already got plans.

- Aw, he does?

- I does?

- You doos.

- I doos.

He promised he'd help me soup up our swan boat, and the only night we can do it is prom night.

Darn our busy social schedules.

Wait, you're fixing up a swan boat?

Yeah, yeah.

That's what we're doing.

'Cause we love swan boats so much, right, bro?

- Honk!

Honk!

Honk!

- Honk!

Honk!

Honk!

Called it.

Once a honker, always a honker.

Hmm!

Hey!

Thank you so much for helping out.

They say you don't really, like, know someone until you've decorated a magical kingdom together.

My pleasure.

Hey, I hear you're singing a song at prom.

Yeah.

Yes, I am.

Um, I'm actually still in the process of writing it, but I think I know what I want it to be about.

It's not about a new guy at school you can't stop thinking about, is it?

No!

Yes.

Yo, tape me.

Whoa!

Nice catch.

When you have five brothers who throw things at you, it's not really a catch as much as a defense mechanism.

What?

Why are there chandeliers where my basketball hoop used to be?

I need to sh**t this ball!

Maddie, are you okay?

Yeah.

No, I'm sorry.

I'm just trying to blow off some "Diggie's in the arctic circle, so I have to go to the prom with my cousin and the crow who lives in his coat" steam.

Hey, Maddie excuse me for a minute.

Liv, we have to trim the curtain by the entrance.

- Scissor me?

- Oh.

Yeah.

Yes.

Here you go.

Okay, bye!

Livy's got a boyfriend!

And laugh like I just said something really funny.

Do you think he likes me?

I think you like him or else I wouldn't have said "Livy's got a boyfriend!" Stop it!

Okay, so what's the plan?

Are you gonna, like, ask him to prom and junk?

What?

No.

Maddie, that's a terrible plan.

No, my plan is already set in motion.

I've introduced him to Andie.

Next, I will ask her to fish around and see if he digs me, and if he does, she will tell him that the digging is mutual, and then boom, prom!

It's really quite simple.

Okay.


Or, you know, you could just seize the moment and go ask him yourself.

I mean, isn't that always what you tell me to do?

Well, yeah, I know, but this is different.

I mean, these are my feelings.

It's, like, way scarier.

Okay, Liv, there is nothing to be scared of.

Believe me it's quite obvious that he's really into you.

Just go tell him you want to go to prom.

Okay, yeah, I know, you're right.

I don't know why I'm being so silly.

I'm just gonna go ask him.

I'm going to the prom with Holden!

What was that?

I'm trying to do the "excited girl" squeal, but I've never done it before.

Sorry.

Wow.

Wow.

Andie.

Oh, this is so big.

You're going to the prom with Holden.

Wow.

How did that how did that happen?

I just asked him, you know?

I like him, so I seized the moment.

Just like you always say.

Yes!

That's me!

I'm a moment seizer!

Thank you for introducing me, Liv.

I'm going to the prom with Holden!

Andie's got a boyfriend!

Ha ha.

Andie's got a boyfriend!

There's my beautiful girl.

Oh!

We can't wait to see you perform at the prom tonight.

Are you excited?

Liv, help!

My brother styled me for the prom.

Wow.

You look so, um What did he do to your hair?

We didn't have a flat iron, so they used a waffle iron.

Uh, yes.

Yeah, there's a Little piece of waffle right there.

Honest answer.

Do you think Holden's gonna hate this?

Well Stop looking at me like that!

Of course I'm gonna fix her.

Don't worry.

You are in the hands of a master.

You know, I actually fixed my mom, and she used to match her lipstick to her purse.

The purse was blue.

It was a bad time.

Aw, there's my beaut - stop.

- Uh-huh.

Come on, krahgg!

Press "play!" Feast your eyes upon my dark essence!

Wow.

Craig, that's oh, no, it's krahgg now.

Yeah, I know.

I'm not doing it.

That's a really unique look for, uh, for the prom.

Looks like, ooh, something out of a nightmare.

As a practitioner of the fantastical, I take that as high praise.

All right.

Uh, come on.

Let's go get you fixed up for prom.

What really?

I think she looks great.

Liv, fix me!

Now, let's be off!

Shall we go by car Or by illusion?

Watch as I disappear!

Krahgg, honey, we can still see you.

You see nothing!

Next we welcome Holden and Andie!

Holden's the new kid, and Andie's a world-class spot welder.

Wow!

Andie, you look great!

Thanks.

It was Liv's idea to fix the dress and get the waffle gunk out of my hair.

She has great fashion sense.

And now let's welcome Maddie and krahgg the insidious!

She's my daughter.

He's Related only by marriage.

All right, so we are here now.

Let's just try and keep a low profile.

Attention, Ridgewood!

I am going to levitate my body in the air by mystical means!

What?

Okay, no!

Okay, krahgg, please do not do this.

You really don't want everyone making fun of you.

The doubters always doubt.

Okay.

Illusion!

Ha ha ha ha!

Oh, you're doing it!

You did it!

That's my cousin!

Bam!

What the what?

Remember my name!

I am krahgg ow!

Avert your eyes or feel my wrath!

Hey!

Hey!

Come on!

Stop recording!

That guy's recording!

That's not cool, guy.

You know, I know I only said I would do this to get out of going to prom with Willow, but I'm actually having fun.

There's my little man!

Willow, what are you doing here?

I figured if we can't go to the prom together, we could "not" go together.

So I'm here to help fix Swanny.

Well, you good with a wrench?

Nothing fits better in my hand Except Joey's hand.

Oh, no.

Have fun, kids!

Willow, don't keep him out too late.

Once upon a time, our daughter Liv wrote a song called "true love.

" Thank you.

Whoo!

Thank you, Liv.

And a special thank you to the Ridgewood ballroom dancing club for making the rest of us look bad.

I packed you some snacks and crow food for the bus.

Krahgg the insidious would like to thank you for a magical three days.

Yeah.

No problem.

It was definitely An interesting experience for us as well.

And auntie Karen says you're super excited to escort me to my prom in two weeks.

You to your prom?

Mom?

Uh Well Mom?

You see Illusion!

Wha Now that's insidious.

Honk!

Honk!
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