04x14 - Comfortably Numb

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ ANDY: Is today a glued-to-the-news day off, or a pretend-everything's-fine day off?

SULLIVAN: I haven't decided yet.

Okay, well, how about we start with a bubble bath, then food, then more food?

How about, um, sex?

Mm, that's what I meant by "bubble bath." Oh.

Uh, I'll...

I'll meet you at the car.

You know, you delaying going home is not gonna stop Carina from leaving.

I should be running home, wanting to soak up every last minute with her, but...

It sucks.

I...

[SIGHS]

As someone who recently weathered a separation from the one she loves, I wish I could say it won't suck, but... it will.

Ah, so inspiring.

Thank you.

[CHUCKLES]

I keep thinking maybe I should just propose, and then she won't have to leave.

Well, um, as someone who also r-recently got married super fast, I... i-it's not the solution to your problems.

You two are meant to be.

You've...

You'll get through this.

Now, go home and soak up every minute.

Make sure you soak it up.

I'm serious.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

♪♪ - [CELLPHONE RINGING]

- Mm.

GABRIELLA: Hi, darling.

It's a disaster here.

It's like being in hell.

When are you coming?

Uh, can't wait.

Well, you can whip us into shape with your American learnings.

- When is your flight?

- [SIGHS]

Tonight.

I'm packing now.

[SIGHS]

You haven't started, have you?

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

_ [SIGHS]

[CAPTAIN & TENNILLE'S "LOVE WILL KEEP US TOGETHER" PLAYS]

INARA: [CLEARS THROAT]

♪♪ - Look at you.

- [LAUGHS]

He won't know what hit him.

[LAUGHS]

Oh.

Uh, Marsha, don't.

I-I can do that.

Oh, I'm almost done, and my body needs to move.

- [DOOR CLOSES]

- It needs to move.

Come on, baby.

[LAUGHTER]

Are we having a dance party?

- Yeah!

- Yeah!

Come join us!

[LAUGHTER]

Like this?

- [LAUGHTER]

- Okay!

Hey, uh, go grab your stuff for the park.

Oh, are we going to the park?

Uh, you're not.

I am.

He's got some kind of egg-drop project for school, and I'm...

I'm gonna take him.

[CLEARS THROAT]

- Okay, you...

- Yeah.

- You feel up for that?

- Of course!

My doctor even says I need more Vitamin D.

And you two need some well-earned alone time.

♪ Ain't gonna set you free now ♪

Oh, all right.

Let's hit the road, Jack.

No, no.

[LAUGHING]

I mean, not Jack.

You.

[LAUGHTER]

Ah, here we go.

Okay, be safe.

And take your cellphone.

- Yeah.

- Hey, masks!

Yes, I know.

I learned my lesson.

♪ I'll be thinking of you ♪

- ♪ Look in my heart ♪

- [LAUGHS]

- ♪ And let love keep us together ♪

- Okay.

[DOOR CLOSES]

♪ Whatever ♪

[TRUCK HORN HONKS]

Michelle's going to the protest at Seattle Center.

You want to go?

- Should we?

- Yeah.

- [CELLPHONE RINGS]

- Maybe we could...

Hold on.

Warren.

Aren't you supposed to be in surgery right now?

I-In a couple hours.

Yeah, I'm, uh...

I'm at the hospital now.

You okay?

Yeah, yeah.

I, um...

Yeah, Miranda couldn't make it.

She, uh..

She had a last-minute surgery, and I-I told her I'd be fine.

Okay.

[WHISPERS]

He wants company.

Hey, uh, y-you want me to come to the hospital, Warren?

No, no, man.

[CHUCKLES]

That...

That'd be silly.

Because, look, I-I get it.

I was nervous when, uh, I had my surgery, and they weren't going anywhere near my cojones.

[LAUGHS]

[CLEARS THROAT]

[LAUGHS]

Look, we're supposed to hit this protest, but I can, uh, come through.

No, no, no, no.

Come on, man.

That's more important, right?

I'm good.

[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]

[CELLPHONE CLICKS LIGHTLY]

♪♪ [SIGHS]

♪♪ - [DOOR CLOSES]

- Is it gonna be cold there?

So-so.

Ah, I need to bring jackets for the night.

I guess you don't need a bathing suit?

Unfortunately, it's not a vacation.

I probably won't ever leave the hospital.

[DRAWER CLOSES]

REPORTER: Protesters spill onto the streets of our city tonight.

Authorities are calling...

I keep wondering what my dad is thinking, watching this.

When people were protesting for gay marriage, he said, "People just can't be happy with what they've got." It's probably why I still haven't come out to him.

My mom went back to him.

- When?

- Couple months ago.

COVID hit, and she moved back in.

Why didn't you tell me before?

Because I've been trying really hard not to think about it.

But now that you're about to go into lockdown, I just keep picturing her trapped, tiptoeing around the house, trying to avoid being in the same room with him or closing a door too loudly or putting too much milk in his coffee.

[SIGHS]

[SIGHS]

- [CELLPHONE RINGS]

- Mm.

[CELLPHONE BEEPS]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

_ [GABRIELLA SPEAKING ITALIAN]

BEN: [CHUCKLING]

I know, baby.

It's okay.

No, in and out, just like we said.

Yeah, well, look, I, uh...

Yeah, yeah.

I, uh...

I love you, too.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS IN DISTANCE]

Uh, look, go...

Go save some lives, all right?

[LAUGHS]

I'm good.

[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]

[TELEPHONE RINGS IN DISTANCE]

[SIGHS]

[CELLPHONE CLATTERS]

Okay, I need you to fill out this form.

It's just a standard safety and...

Oh, I know all about the forms.

I'm, uh...

[LAUGHS]

I'm actually a surgeon.

Oh, good.

Surgeons make the best patients.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Do you have someone to come pick you up later today?

[SIGHS]

Uh, yeah, my wife will be here.

She's a...

She's a doctor, too.

You know, she got stuck in surgery.

Oh, wow.

Whole family of doctors.

Yep, and our foster son's gonna be one, too.

Nurse Lea?

Someone's here for Mr. Warren.

Says she's his emergency contact for the day?

Hey.

Mind if I hang out?

BEN: [CHUCKLES]

Hey.

Uh, th...

this is...

This is my friend, Andy.

Hi.

NURSE LEA: Um, okay, Dr.

Warren.

The anesthesiologist will be in shortly to perform your...

Open airway exam and obtain consent for anesthesia.

Yeah.

Let me guess...

you're an anesthesiologist, too?

Actually, yeah.

- [LAUGHTER]

- It's...

I'm sorry.

[LAUGHS]

What are you doing here?

Well, my dad would have wanted me to be here for you.

[CHUCKLES]

Solidarity.

Thanks, Andy.

It's kind of weird, right?

Yeah.

- Wait, what?

- The quiet.

No one's sick.

No one's in crisis.

We're just...

fine.

Yeah.

No, yeah, that's...

That's a first for us.

It's nice.

Yeah.

Should...

Uh, should we watch a...

A movie or something?

We haven't had childcare since we became a couple, so, no.

No, I-I very much would not like to watch a movie.

- Oh.

- [LAUGHS]

Is this okay?

Whoa.

Yeah.

Yeah?

[LAUGHS]

- Is this okay?

- Mm-hmm.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- I mean...

- Oh.

Just, like...

Yeah.

- There.

- Whoa.

Okay.

- Okay?

- Yeah.

- [WOMAN SCREAMS]

- [BODY SLAMS]

- Whoa!

- Oh!

My God!

- A person!

- Okay.

Uh...

[OBJECTS CLATTERING]

Aah!

[SCREAMS]

Oh, G...

Oh, no, no, no!

We have to help her.

Do we?

[GROANING]

- SONIA: Ohh.

Oh, no.

- Miss?!

- No, no.

No, no, no, no, no.

- Hello?

Are you okay?

Who is that?

INARA: Uh, we live in Apartment .

Are you all right?

Uh, I hit my back on the side of the dumpster and fell in.

I can't believe it!

[LAUGHS]

I fell into...

Into a dumpster!

Uh, I'm gonna call...

- Yeah, okay.

- [GROANS]

No, no, no, no, no!

Don't...

Don't move!

Don't...

Hey, hey.

Y-You can't do that, okay?

It's very important that you stay still until I can check on you, okay?

Um, you said you hit your back?

Yeah.

Okay, can you tell me where it hurts?

Well, my back.

Lower.

Uh, I don't know, like everywhere.

Okay.

Uh, it's okay.

Uh, d... did you hit your head?

No, I don't...

I don't...

I don't think so.

Good.

That's good.

Your fingers, your toes, can you... can you wiggle them?

SONIA: Uh, fingers, yes.

Toes, I-I don't know if they're moving.

I can't tell.

My legs are tingling, though.

Is...

Is that bad?

Um...

Thank you.

I can't...

I can't say either way if that's good or bad.

I-I...

But you're talking, and that's always a good sign, right?

Are...

Are...

Are you a doctor?

No, I'm...

I'm a firefighter.

Uh, what's your name?

- Sonia.

- Sonia.

I, uh, thought I was walking out on to the fire escape, but, uh, I guess I wasn't.

[LAUGHS]

Uh, I called .

They'll be here as quickly as possible, okay?

No!

No, no, no!

You said you're a firefighter?

Can't you just get me out of here and...

and take me home?

I swear, I'll go straight home.

No, no.

If...

If I move you, I risk, you know, damaging your spine...

An ambulance will risk damaging my life, okay?

[WHIMPERING]

I need to go.

- No, no, s-stop!

- Ow!

Stop!

You need to stay still.

Ugh, I hate staying still!

Maybe you should get in there with her?

I don't want to risk jostling her by climbing all over the garbage.

Yeah.

Um, why don't you want the ambulance to come?

My husband will see.

Is he...

Is he hurting you, Sonia?

Because if so, we can help you get...

Oh, no.

God, no, no, no.

He's...

He's perfect.

He's...

Yeah, he's perfect.

I'm the trash person.

I'm the trash...

Literally in a dumpster.

[VOICE BREAKING]

I am a dumpspster person.

Sonia, I'm sure that's not true, okay?

Ju...

And plus, you need proper care, okay?

You deserve it.

Do you...

I'm cheating on my husband with my neighbor, okay?

Ever since lockdown happened, I just...

I've been crawling out of my skin.

And then...

And then, the news is just so intense, and...

and I just...

I had...

I had to do something, okay?

That's good.

You should talk to us.

- You know, let it out.

- [SIGHS]

Um, but just try to stay still in the process, okay?

Oh.

It feels good to say it out loud.

[LAUGHS]

[CHUCKLES]

I felt so trapped and... and bored.

And I told my husband I was going for walks, but I would actually go see Matt when his girlfriend was out of town.

She was away for the week, but I guess she came back early.

I-I panicked, and I...

And I ran for the fire escape.

And now I'm here, and if the ambulance comes, and it's gonna be this whole thing, and my husband's gonna find out, and my life...

my life will be over!

No, it's not gonna be...

And I need to get out of...

S-Sonia, you got to stop moving.

Please.

- S-Screw it.

- Aah!

Okay, I'm coming.

Stop.

Ow, my leg is sh**ting pain!

[WHIMPERING]

Ah!

Okay, I got you.

I got you.

I got you.

Oh, God!

Oh!

[PANTING]

Okay, okay.

- Do you feel this?

- Feel what?

- Nothing?

- No.

Okay.

Okay.

Listen, I know what you're feeling.

I've made choices that, uh, I'm not proud of, okay?

[CRYING]

I slept with a married woman.

[SOBBING]

More than once.

[BREATHING SHARPLY]

Her name was Eva.

And, uh...

Yeah, she was bad news.

- [CHUCKLES]

- But each time...

I was looking for something

- nobody could give me, you know?

- [GROANING]

But mistakes...

Well, they come and go.

But paralysis?

That's permanent.

So, maybe listen to me, okay?

No, I can't.

You can't call the ambulance.

Please.

I'm gonna level with you, okay?

You can't feel your toes.

That's not a good sign.

You need to be lifted out of here without a rotation of your spine, okay?

This injury could change your life.

These paramedics can save it.

Sonia?

Matt?

- Damn!

- Uh...

Are you okay?

Uh, I don't know.

Wait, are you Eric?

Uh, no, I'm Jack.

He's a firefighter.

Did your girlfriend see what happened?

Oh, no, it was the dog walker.

They had a key, and... and we were supposed to be out of town, so he just let himself in.

Where's my phone?

Eric is probably looking for me.

Uh, I think it's still upstairs.

- I-I'll just, um...

- [SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]

I'll go get it, okay?

Oh, God.

I'm gonna go check on the ambulance.

Yeah, okay.

- Good idea.

- [GROANING]

This is...

Please.

[GROANS]

Uh, what's going on?

Uh, a woman is injured.

We called an ambulance.

- In the dumpster?

- Yeah.

I'm so stupid.

I could have stayed home and made sourdough bread like everybody else.

But, no, I had to go have an affair.

This is a dumpster fire of a year, and I am at the center of it.

I am literally in a dumpster fire, an...

Sonia?

Eric?

Did you just say you're having an affair?

[WHIMPERING]

[CRYING]

[SIRENS WAILING]

You're bringing your knives with you?

I don't know what the rental is gonna have, and I want to minimize the amount of deliveries we get.

How long are you planning on staying?

I'm not planning on any amount, Maya, because I can't, because I don't know.

I...

[SCOFFS]

[CABINET DOOR OPENS]

Ugh.

[SIGHS]

I'm sorry.

It's fine.

It's a lot.

Okay.

Uh, can you pass me those, please?

Carina, I...

So, you never came out to your parents?

Um.

My mom knows.

Pretty sure my dad does, too, but I never officially told them, no.

Were you afraid to tell your dad?

Yeah, but less because I was scared he'd yell at me.

That was gonna happen no matter what I did.

I guess it just felt private?

- Okay.

- I mean, I'd never been in a relationship with a woman...

- Okay.

- So, I figured if I didn't tell my family about every single guy I slept with, why should I tell them about the women?

Fair enough.

You know, honestly...

...until I met you...

Mm-hmm?

- [DRAWER OPENS]

- ...I think a part of me always assumed I'd end up marrying a man.

- [DRAWER CLOSES]

- Really?

But now, I'm thinking...

I mean, I guess I can see that.

Your dad kind of drilled a sense of "my way is the only way" into you.

That's probably why I never want to get married.

[CHUCKLES]

My parents made it look so unappealing.

You don't want to get married?

Oh, no.

I don't believe in it.

Oh.

♪♪ So...

So, we think we're all slick getting a bathroom pass...

- BEN: Mm-hmm.

- ...sneaking out through the cafeteria side door, and then, there he is.

Papi on Engine with Snuffy and all the other guys.

Oh, no.

[LAUGHS]

And the minute we stepped foot outside the school, we hear...

- [IMITATING SIREN WAILING]

- [LAUGHS]

"Attention, young people.

Please return to your classes.

That is an order from Seattle Fire Department." Dude...

Ryan almost peed his pants.

[LAUGHS]

Yeah!

Oh, b-but how'd he even know that you were gonna cut class?

To this day, I still have no idea.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Oh.

I...

I wish...

I wish I would have asked him.

[CHUCKLES]

God.

Warren, I-I know getting this surgery isn't easy, but I'm really glad you're doing it.

Yeah, well, you know, I figured I owed it to your old man.

Dr.

Warren.

Dr.

Kabir.

You ready?

Uh, yes, sir, I am.

- Uh, hey, uh, will you hold my phone?

- Sure.

And, uh, you know, if Miranda calls, just tell her I'm...

I'm okay.

Hey, Warren, give 'em hell.

Oh.

Yeah.

[SIGHS]

♪♪ Seriously, Sonia?!

The grunge guy?!

We make fun of him!

I'm sorry!

I'm sorry!

I wasn't thinking!

It just...

It just happened!

Sonia, you got to stop moving your neck, okay?

And if you're gonna upset her, you need to stand back.

Upset her?

What about me?

I'm upset!

I-I-I don't know...

I don't know why!

I wish I wasn't like this!

I d...

I don't know why.

[CRYING]

I don't know why.

- [SOBBING]

- Hey, hey.

Can you feel this?

- Mnh-mnh.

- ERIC: You know, it's one thing to just totally rip my heart out, but in the middle of a pandemic?

- [SIREN WAILING]

- [SOBBING, MUMBLING]

I mean, we have been so careful, and...

And you put us at risk because of...

of grunge guy!

I mean, who knows where that dirtbag has been?!

- [WAILING CONTINUES]

- Hey, I've been careful, too, man!

- Oh, you have, huh?!

- Yeah.

Well, that makes me feel way better.

[SCOFFS]

Yeah, you don't even wear a mask!

- Hey, six feet, man!

- Stop!

Six feet!

Why are men like this?

You slept with my wife, which means we are a pod!

[GRUNTING]

[BRAKES SQUEAL]

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Whoa.

Hey.

Aah!

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

Get off, man!

Hey!

Easy!

Keep him away from me!

And call his girlfriend!

What?

Come on.

Hey, Gibson.

- JACK: Oh, Finch.

- In your element.

[CHUCKLES SARCASTICALLY]

Sonia fell from the third floor, hit her lower back.

No head injury or LOC, but she's getting a progressive weakness and tingling in her lower and now upper extremities.

Okay.

Gibson, you can go now.

[SOBBING]

Uh, you know, I think I'll stick around, help out.

I'm so sorry, baby!

I promise, I've never done anything like this!

I swear!

You got to stop yelling, okay?

You always do this.

I've never cheated on you, though!

Spine board!

- [SOBBING]

- We were fine.

We were happy.

We had our groceries delivered every Tuesday.

We had that virtual game night on Fridays.

We were fine and healthy, and when everything is fine, that's when you do this.

[WHIMPERS]

Just create chaos out of nothing.

[CRYING]

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

[SOBBING]

♪♪ [CRYING]

I'm so sorry.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

[CELLPHONE BEEPS]

Wow.

She really has a lot of questions.

Yeah, she gets fixated on one thing and can't move on until she solves the problem.

And I guess I'm really good at helping her solving problems.

Got it.

So, not only are we gonna be apart for

[CHUCKLING]

who knows how long, you're gonna be spending your days and nights with your ex-sex-friend who needs you to solve all of her problems.

Every time you say...

- [SIGHS]

- ...we are going to be apart, you say it like you are mad at me.

- [SCOFFS]

- Like it's my fault.

I'm not mad.

I just...

Didn't you know months ago that your visa was up?

Oh, so, you are mad at me for it.

That is not what I said.

[SIGHS]

Okay, Maya, all I need from you right now is to be supportive in this terrifying time, and...

I am supporting.

And to not make me feel worse about it.

Ah, but all you seem to be able to do is worry about how it will negatively impact you a-and fixate on little details like who I'm gonna be working with.

Okay, do you know any specifics about my visa?

Do you know what it take to get it renewed?

When I tried to tell you about it, you called it my "visa things," a-a-and your eyes glaze over.

Uh...

I've told you three times.

No, I can't get a waiver.

This is not how the U.S. Government works and definitely not how it works in the middle of a pandemic.

I'm sorry.

You don't know what it feels like to be so easily removed from the place you're trying to make your home...

To be kicked out of the country where you're trying to build a life because of bureaucracy.

And...

A-And t-to be terrified that if you don't do everything exactly right a-and dot every "I", cross every "t," y-you risk never being allowed in that country again.

N-N-Never being allowed, Maya.

Do you know what that feels like?

- No, I don't.

- Yeah, you can't.

So, it's my fault that I was born here.

Oh, nobody's talking about fault!

Why does every conversation about us has to be about winners and losers...

Us versus them?

This...

Okay, this is the problem with this country...

Th...

the borders, the division, the walls.

This is the p...

[SIGHS]

Mm.

I'm sorry.

I-I...

Oh, I-I f...

I f...

I feel crazy.

I...

I got from feeling totally empty to feeling everything at once.

- I'm sorry, bambina, I...

- It's fine.

I know that when I am excited, i-it seems like I'm yelling, but I am not yell...

I'm not yelling at you.

But, b-bambina, it's like...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

- It's okay.

- I'm so...

It's fi...

It's fine...

It's fine!

[SIGHS]

- I hate this.

- Mm.

I know.

Everything you said is true.

I was so worried about you leaving that I never actually asked you how you felt.

I just assumed that you were happy to go home for a little bit.

"Home"?

I know.

I know your home-home is in the south.

I just thought that...

[SIGHS]

Italy hasn't felt like home since my mama left when I was years old.

Then it just became the place where I lived.

I didn't find my home until I met you, bambina.

You're my home, and I'm being kicked out of my home in the middle of a pandemic.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

[SIGHS]

It sucks.

And you've been pretending it's no big deal so that I wouldn't lose it.

♪♪ - I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.

- I love you.

I love you.

♪♪ [BOTH LAUGH]

You're in good hands.

No need to worry.

Dr.

Reid here is gonna make sure you have a nice, comfy sleep.

- [MONITOR BEEPING]

- I'm looking forward to it.

And when you're ready, count back from .

...

...

...

.

[STATIC CRACKLES]

... .

[MONITOR BEEPING ECHOES]

Hello?

Hello?

Wh...

Why aren't I out?

Hey, what dose of propofol did you use?

Don't worry.

Whoa, what the...?

I'm an anesthesiologist, too.

[STAMMERS]

What's...

What's going on?

It's all good.

The surgeon will be in in just a moment.

Well, I...

No, no, no.

No, no, no, no, 'cause I-I-I'm not ready for a surgery.

I'm awake.

Eh, he knows what he's doing.

Trust me.

[BEEPING CONTINUES]

Let's get to cuttin'.

Wh...

Oh.

Where's Dr. Kabir, okay?

W-What did you do with him?

Oh.

[MUFFLED]

Let me go!

Let me go!

Man, what...

What are you doing?

[SCOFFS]

W-What am I doing?

Do you know what part of you that fool was gonna cut off?

blade.

W...

Joey?

Okay, w-w-w-what are you gonna cut, then?

Anything.

You know, anything but that.

L-Look, trust me.

I promise you, my friend, your manhood is staying intact.

Okay, w-w-w-w-w-wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

What are you cutting?

You know, I haven't decided yet.

I need both my arms and both my legs for my job.

O-Oh, how about a gallbladder?

JOEY: He can live without that.

What he can't live without is his manhood.

Well, I mean, Joey, I d...

I don't think you're really qualified to advise a surgeon or a patient.

I-I'm saying, it takes a certain kind of man to run into fire for a living, and if you let them cut the wrong part, that could change.

He's not wrong.

Your testosterone is not an insignificant factor in what we think of as courage.

[LAUGHS]

Were you that big of a nerd before I met you?

No, I was a...

Nerd or not, he...

he will always have me as a back-up plan.

You might be content to sit on that little stool and do your crossword puzzle, but I...

I need to feel the heat.

Well, the heat was never your problem.

Lisa?

Ben, you had a girlfriend before Miranda?

Oh, he had lots of 'em.

Remember Jenette?

Oh, wow.

Jenette.

She was my roommate.

He slept with us both.

[LAUGHS]

Thinks we don't know.

Oh, Ben, I didn't think you had it in you.

Well, he won't after this.

Oh, he sure will.

See, I'm gonna cut out his kidney instead and donate it to somebody who needs it.

Oh, he'll like that.

He likes to play the hero.

Benjamin Warren.

Ma?!

I did not raise a fool.

Why are you here?

Because you're scared, and that makes you stupid.

But no matter how scared or stupid you get, you have to listen to your mama.

Mom...

Mom, I'm...

I'm not...

I'm not scared.

Ben, are you gonna die?

Uh, who's this?

This is my son.

- You have a son?

- Adopted.

No, y-you're my son, Joey.

Yes, he is.

So, you know what you have to do?

You have to cut out the cancer.

No, no.

No, no, no.

Okay, do you know where it is?

I couldn't care less where it is as long as you take it out.

Because when you have a child, you fight to live.

You fought.

I fought.

Lost in the end, but damn if I didn't fight to stay with you.

[CHUCKLES]

You have two beautiful boys and a wife who loves you, so now you have to fight.

Okay, Mom, y-you don't understand.

I do understand, Benjamin.

I know your scared face.

[LAUGHS]

First time I saw it, you were years old.

You thought the sandman was in your closet.

Hasn't changed.

He cried for his mama.

♪ Your hands were made for praise ♪

George Floyd.

When...

When they were k*lling him, he cr...

- He cried for his mama.

- ♪ To praise ♪

I heard it.

♪ So give thanks ♪

We all heard it.

He knew he was gonna die.

♪ Your heart ♪ He was scared, and so...

♪ Was made to love him ♪

♪♪ ...he needed his mama.

I've got you, Benjamin.

And your sister.

I'm here.

[BREATHES SHARPLY]

Mama.

Oh, my baby.

[LAUGHS]

Oh, my baby.

I'm here.

[LAUGHS]

[SNIFFLES]

Now, you give that scalpel to someone who is strong enough and brave enough to cut what needs to be cut.

- Mom...

- Benjamin.

♪♪ ♪ She prays ♪

Do you know what you're doing?

Yeah.

I'm gonna be a surgeon.

[CHUCKLES]

When you were little, do you remember what you thought you were gonna be when you grew up?

[LAUGHS]

A football player.

The first Black president.

[LAUGHTER]

I thought you had a chance.

I can't believe I ever wanted to be president.

Aww, you just wanted to fix what others weren't willing to fix.

The world might look a lot different today if you had.

Still can.

If you stay alive.

And...

- ♪ 'Cause you won't make it... ♪

- Done.

♪ ...if you keep sinning ♪

♪♪

That is not what makes you a man, Benjamin.

It's what would have made you a dead man.

♪ Don't you lose faith ♪

[EXTINGUISHER HISSING]

♪ Don't you lose hope ♪

You did it, son.

- ♪ Don't you lose... ♪

- You did it, son.

♪ ...it all ♪

♪ Don't you lose, no ♪

♪ Don't you lose it all ♪

- That was crazy.

- Yeah.

I mean, cheating on her husband in the same building?

That's...

That's bold.

So, you and... Eva?

What's that story?

[CLEARS THROAT]

I did some, uh, dumb things in my past.

But, um, luckily, I found you.

Mm.

Now I'm happy just being boring, you know?

What if I'm not?

[DISHWARE CLATTERS LIGHTLY]

Hmm?

Hey, hey.

Ooh!

Do y...

Do you not like that?

Uh, no, I-I-I do.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

[SIGHS]

I...

[SIGHS LIGHTLY]

Y-You don't need to do all of this.

All what?

[SCOFFS]

No, I...

I, uh...

I-I like you so much, and I care about you, and I...

[CLEARS THROAT]

I love taking care of...

Of you and Marcus.

So, that means I can't be sexy?

Because you like taking care of me and my kid?

No.

No, that...

[SIGHS]

This is not coming out right.

What I'm saying is, you don't need to be something that you're not because I did some crazy things in my past.

You know, I don't need that from you.

I'm not.

Jack, I'm a whole person.

And believe it or not, I like sex, too.

I know you do.

I-I'm saying it doesn't have to be all wild, you know?

Now...

And with your history, you know?

- I just...

- INARA: Oh, I see.

Because you rescued me from an abusive situation, you think I'm made of glass.

That's not wh...

I'm not just some damsel you need to keep rescuing, Jack.

♪ When everything around me ♪

- ♪ Just seems to change ♪

- Oh!

♪ I need to know that it's all gonna be okay ♪

♪ On the other side ♪

♪ Of tears running down your face ♪

♪ Is when we'll make it through to some better days ♪

- ♪ Some better days ♪

- [CHUCKLES]

Jack asked if it was weird having a girlfriend who's up in other ladies' bits all day.

[LAUGHS]

Jack would ask something like that.

I asked him if Inara minded that he plays with hoses all day.

[BOTH LAUGH]

- [CELLPHONE CHIMING]

- Stupido.

- Oh, crap.

- Yeah.

We have to leave in like minutes.

[SIGHS]

You would think that seeing vaginas ripped open by a baby's head would make me less interested in sex with women, but, oddly, it hasn't.

Mm.

I imagine it has made you less interested in giving birth, though.

No, not really.

Wait, what?

I still want to have a baby.

Oh.

Yeah.

Wait, but you...

But you don't want to get married?

[CHUCKLING]

What?

I mean, before, you said you don't want to get married.

But you do want to have kids?

Okay, you know the story of my parents.

And look at your parents, bambina.

The...

The marriage has literally trapped your mom in a house with her abuser.

Why would you want that?

I mean, but we're not my parents.

I know, and I'm trying really hard not to be mine, either.

Where's the...

I-I-I thought we were building a future together.

Um, we are.

We don't need to be married to that.

Yeah, but you're moving back to Italy.

Ah, bambina, what do you want me to do about that?

That wasn't my plan, either.

Do you think I want to move back to a country where...

That reminds me of my dead mother, my dead brother, and my very difficult father?

I'm sorry I have to leave.

If there was any other way, I...

There is.

[GROANS]

We could get married.

I'm not getting married just because of the visa.

"Just because"?

You know what I mean.

I really don't, apparently.

Maya, this is not something you do to solve a problem.

I don't see any other way.

We are doing the other way.

I've already left Grey-Sloan.

I-I got a job in Italy.

I am about to go to the airport.

We can't get married just because you don't want to be apart from me.

That's not why we would be getting married.

That's why we moved in together.

That was just the bureaucracy of it.

And s-so is this marriage idea.

It's bureaucracy.

The only reason it's coming up is because I'm not from this country and I can't stay in yours.

- That's it.

- "That's it"?

That's a pretty good reason.

M-Maya, you didn't even want this until you started getting sad about me leaving.

Started?

I have been devastated.

I am trying to lead my team through one of the worst moments in our history.

I have a firehouse full of grieving firefighters and a girlfriend that's about to leave me to go to Italy!

Oh, I know, Maya!

I know it's been a very hard year!

Not just for you...

Trust me!

[SIGHS]

Carina, I love you.

But?

Maybe you're right.

This is...

This is crazy.

Maybe we moved too fast.

Maybe we didn't think this through.

Maybe we hardly know each other.

Maybe we should just take a break.

I mean, not...

Not for good.

Just...

[STAMMERS]

We don't even know when you're gonna be able to come back.

And s...

And so, what?

You want to see other people?

- No.

- I-In the middle of a pandemic?

No, but the time difference...

And you'll be busy, and I'll be busy.

And the world...

my city...

Is on fire.

Maya, breathe.

And I mean it in the most unimaginable...

Breathe.

Breathe, Maya.

Breathe.

[SIGHS]

Carina, we have learned more about each other in the last two hours than we have in our entire relationship.

I should have known that you don't want to get married and that you do want to have babies.

I knew it.

I knew you would freak out on me eventually.

Carina, everything you said is right.

I've made no effort to learn your culture or your language.

I do not understand what you're going through with all your visa stuff.

I mean, maybe we're just not right for each other.

Ah, okay.

So, you want to break up temporarily?

Or are we breaking up because we're not right for each other?

I didn't say "break up." I said "take a break." Frankly, I don't understand the difference.

W...

Or, do you want to get married?

I married you the day I moved into this apartment, Maya.

I don't believe in ticking a box and calling that a marriage.

I-I believe in building a life together with the person you want to spend it with every single day.

When I moved into this house, for me, that was a marriage.

That is not how it works.

No, marriage... the kind the government says is okay...

Puts an obligation on love.

Marriage ruins family.

Marriage is just a made up...

financial...

Marriage is what can keep us together!

Exactly!

It is crazy that the only recourse that I have to stay in Seattle...

To stay in my life with you...

Is to sign a piece of paper saying that I will never leave you!

A piece of paper that people like us aren't allowed to have in my country.

And if it's j-just so much crap, then why does it matter?!

Why not just do it so that we can stay together?!

So we can be together while the world is burning?!

Everyone is so scared, everyone is lonely, everyone is desperate, and we have each other.

We got so lucky, and you are willing to throw that away on a principle.

No, Maya.

You are throwing it away.

I am just being realistic.

♪♪ Well, you'll still have Gabriella.

Wow.

I mean, maybe she is who you're supposed to be with.

Maya, stop.

Maybe we're just not meant to be together forever.

Stop, Maya.

You've said enough.

♪♪ [THUMPS]

You still want me to take you to the airport?

No.

♪♪ ♪♪

[SIRENS WAILING]

- Is everyone else coming?

- Uh, no.

Uh, Miller, Hughes, and Montgomery went to a protest, but they sent love and some oversized donut holes.

[LAUGHS]

It's the little things.

Don't let Warren hear you say that.

Ah.

Gosh, I can't believe Warren's going through this on top of everything else.

It's...

It's a lot.

It's a lot.

Pulled a woman out of a dumpster today.

Yeah, she, uh, was sneaking out of her neighbor's apartment, fell right in.

I thought she severed her spinal cord.

Turns out, she just bruised it.

Wait, she was sneaking out?

Well, she was...

She was having an affair.

Oh.

Please tell me you're not the neighbor.

Oh, shut up.

- [LAUGHS]

- Wow.

Hey, how's it going with you and Inara?

Yeah, no, um, good.

Yeah, she's, uh...

She's great.

Really sweet.

BEN: Mama?

[CHUCKLES]

Hey.

Hmm?

Oh.

You are not my mom.

[LAUGHS]

No, I'm not.

[SIGHS]

Thanks for coming, though.

Good nap?

Craziest dreams.

How'd we do?

You know, good margins.

Clean field.

Nice and neat.

Looks like the morphine hasn't worn off.

[VELCRO TEARS]

Uh, this is from , by the way.

They figured you could use some new balls.

[LAUGHTER]

This is a real heavy one.

Yeah, that's about the right...

It's about right.

Yeah, it'd probably match you perfectly.

This glows in the dark.

I love this.

We got some nuts.

So, not much has changed since I was out, hmm?

[BOTH LAUGH]

[SIGHS]

GABRIELLA: So, she proposed?

Eh, it was more a, "We could get married, I guess." [STAMMERS]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

_ [SPEAKING ITALIAN]


G-Gabriella, m-my parents nearly k*lled each other.

They...

They...

They...

They separated Andrea and I.

- They...

They...

- Okay, okay.

Listen to me.

Everyone's parents get divorced.

That's not a good excuse not to get married.

Okay, okay.

Marriage is not real.

Hang on a second.

[SIGHS]

What were you saying?

- Marriage is not real.

- [SIGHS]

Then get a divorce in two years.

So what?

What Maya and I have is real, a-and I don't need a piece of paper to tell me that.

And I don't want to run into a situation that we might regret in a couple of years just because of paperwork.

So, you're willing to lose her instead, huh?

[SIGHS]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

_ [SPEAKING ITALIAN]

I've known you for half of my life, and, honestly, I have never seen you as at peace as I did when I saw you with her.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

_ _
♪ I write my story with more than words ♪

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

You should be celebrating the fact that her country even allows you to get married.

♪ For the voice that can't be heard ♪

[SIGHS]

♪ Carve my heart into this dirt ♪

♪♪

- ♪ Someone told me ♪ - So, I...

[SCOFFS]

You just...

You just let her go?

What am I supposed to do?

I was awful.

She was awful.

B-But you guys are gonna get back together, right?

Once her visa gets renewed?

Maya?

♪ The pace waiting for us to turn ♪

Marry me.

♪ For the fire inside that burns ♪

Marry me.

I know I'm a stubborn idiot and I don't want to get married just because the government says we have to, and I still think marriage was invented to keep women as property, but I'd much rather do something that I don't want to than lose you.

Carina, I...

I don't know if I want kids, and the world is a mess right now.

Yes, the world is a mess, and the world is changing.

Right now, as we're standing here, the world is changing, and it's beautiful.

We can worry about kids later.

Now, what I know is that I want to be in this beautiful mess of a changing world with you.

Please.

Please, bambina, marry me.

♪ No limits, no limits ♪

- Yes.

- [LAUGHS]

Yes?

Yes.

[VOCALIZING]

♪♪ ♪♪

What'd I miss?

[VOCALIZING]

We're getting married.

- Whoa!

- What?!

[LAUGHTER]

♪ Oh-whoa-oh ♪

Thank you.

♪ Love has no limits ♪

♪ No limits ♪

♪ No limits ♪