04x17 - Suddenly Last Summer

[bunniefuu]

GRACE: Previously on The Secret
Life of the American Teenager...

I miss you. And I miss Lauren.

Yeah, well, you should
have thought about how much

you were going to miss us
before you slept with Jesse.

Who do you hate? Madison.

She...

Stole my idea for a paper that we
had to write for sociology class.

But now I'm forbidden to
see Dylan again, and...

I am going to see Dylan again.

The three of you are going
to end your friendship

because you bought the
same backpack as Lauren?

Well, she wanted to be
the only one that had it.

You wanna have dinner,
just the two of us?

We haven't done that in a long time.

So that leaves the two of us.

And your buddies.

What buddies?

Hi, Amy.

Shut up.

This isn't about a backpack?

It's not about a backpack.

It's not about a stolen
idea for a paper, either.

That wasn't Ben's pot we were smoking.

Then whose pot was it?

Mercedes.

Mom, what is it? Your
dad had a girlfriend.

I want to know my brother and my sister.

I am sure they want to
get to know you as well.

But I want them to have
some time to absorb all this.

Hi, there.

Oh. Hi. How are you?

Fine, thank you. And you?

Well, I'd be better
if we weren't talking

as if we were in some sort
of textbook on manners.

What's up, sister?

Nothing. I'm just here to meet George.

Are Amy and Ricky here yet?

Oh. They're not coming. I said
I'd watch the little fellas.

What?

Well, to be perfectly honest,

I don't know how
comfortable I feel with that.

I mean, Robie doesn't know
you all that well yet, and...

(LAUGHS) I'm goofing on you.

Ricky and Amy are coming to babysit

and that's why I made little
John his favorite meal.

Oh! I didn't know he
had a favorite meal.

But, you know, I don't get to spend
that much time with him anymore.

Well, then you should
come up here more often.

Or Amy and Ricky should
bring him down more often.

Or you should come up here more often.

We'd all like to see you more often.

What does that mean, exactly?

You'd all like to see me more often.

Nothing. Other than that.

I mean, who, specifically, is "all"?

BOTH: I was not looking at you.

You know, George did this.

Yeah, I was perfectly
comfortable with you, and then...

I don't know, you got all comfortable
with him, and then I started thinking

that you two were talking about me

and whether or not I'm
gay, and I'm not gay.

But I don't care about you being gay,

and just for the record,
that is not the issue

that I have with you taking
care of John. It's just that...

That I'm an addict, or an
ex-addict, and I have a record

and, oh, I was a bad mom to boot.

And let's see,

you're okay with my being gay.

And with your not being gay. Got it.

You're not looking at me?

No!

Are you looking at me?

No, I am not looking at you, but...

Not to call you a liar but I
think you are looking at me.

Oh, great.

I think we left some things in the car.

And I think I'll help you find them.

Don't look at me. Oh.

(SIGHS)

I'm not gay.

No one said you were.

What are you talking about?

Your father saw me talking
to Nora a few weeks ago,

just talking. And then he accused me of

looking at her.

That's ridiculous.

He told her, she told Ricky,
and Ricky told you. I knew it.

He skipped her. He told
Ricky and Ricky told me.

But it's still ridiculous.

Yeah, it is. But you know, um,

even if it's not ridiculous,
that would be okay.

What? Amy, I'm not gay.

I didn't say anything.
Not to her, anyway.

Ready to go?

I guess.

Me, too. I'm going out with Lauren.

Ricky will be here.

When were you going to tell us this?

I don't know, why would I tell you this?

Because I thought that you and
Ricky were babysitting together.

You don't trust Ricky
with Robie and John?

Oh. You don't trust Ricky
and Nora with Robie and John.

Fine. There's no reason
not to trust Ricky.

He would never let anything
happen to Robie or John,

but if you don't trust
him, then maybe you should

make Ashley stay home
and babysit for you.

She and Toby went to look
at a community college

that I asked her to look at

before she goes off to Florida again.

So I would really appreciate
it if you would stay here.

But why?

Because I asked you to

and because that's what I
feel most comfortable with

and because you said you would.

So, Amy, do you mind?

I don't care if she minds. Amy.

Your mother really doesn't ask
you to do anything very often.

So, you stay here with
Ricky and babysit the boys

and we're going out like we planned.

This is not the first time
you've asked me to babysit.

Look, I don't mind suffering because
I had a baby when I shouldn't have,

but I do mind suffering because you
two had a baby when you shouldn't have.

It's summer!

I would like to just have
one summer in high school

where I don't have to be responsible
every single minute for someone else.

And whose fault is that? Okay, fine.

Just the three of you go out.

We will be fine without your help, Amy.

We certainly wouldn't want
to add to your suffering.

Good.

You know, everyone
thinks my life is perfect

because I'm engaged and everything,

but it's not. My life is not perfect.

Sometimes it sucks!

♪ Falling in love is
such an easy thing to do

♪ Birds can do it We can do it

♪ Let's stop talking Let's get to it

♪ Let's fall in love

NORA: Good job! Good job!

(NORA BABBLING PLAYFULLY)

No. We're going.

No, we're not. Amy, come on,

let's not get your parents all upset.

Just call Lauren meet
her some other night.

No, I don't want and tell heren

I'll meet he: some other night.

There's no reason tonight
like we had planned.

I don't have any homework tonight

and I wanto go to the
concert in the park.

Oh, come on, it's not
to that stupid concert.

It's nothing. out of the house.

Yes, I do want out of the house.

And I was looking forward
to being out of the house

and if you're not then
too bad for them.obie,

(CHUCKLES) Wow, Miss Cranky-Pants.

You getting your period or something?

Is that any of your business? Is it?

Like you're never in a bad mood.

Maybe you're getting your period.

Can we go now?

I knew this was going to happen.

Amy wants to go out with Lauren tonight.

And she doesn't want to babysit

so I said I would babysit

but I told her and she didn't,

and now and her dad's upset

and she's upset, and...

(SIGHS) Great.

Maybe she's feeling confined.

I mean, I know the feeling.

Of course, I know it
from being confined,

which is why this apart, pretty much.

No one trusts me to babysit.

Yeah, incarceration
doesn't it?sequences,

Oh, "incarceration."

Pulling out I'm impressed.

I don't know if Amy's feeling confined

or it's just but
something's up with her.

You think?

Maybe it has nothing to do with you.

One would hope.

Yeah, one would hope.
if you thinkn idiot

this has nothing whatever it is.

I'm not an idiot. Don't call me names.

Well, you called me an ex-con.

I mean, you used fancy words,
but that's what you said.

But... (CAR HORN HONKS)

I forgot that you didn't have your car,

so get John and I'll
drop the two of you off.

You know what? I'll stay here.

I'll talk to your mom. She'll be
okay with me staying with Robie,

and you just go do whatever you need

to do tonight and pick me up later.

My mother won't be okay
with you and your mother

watching Robie, so let's just leave.

I really prefer to do
what I say I'm going to do.

Oh, don't get all
sanctimonious on me, okay?

All right. Just go on.

Get out for a while.
You need to get out.

What does that mean,
that I need to get out?

That I'm short-tempered
and I'm a bad mother?

I didn't say that.

Fine. I'll get out.

I deserve to get out for just
one lousy night. It's summer.

Bye, John! I'll see you later.

I'll be back, okay?

Yeah. Mommy's funny.

And a little crazy today.

This is what you wanted
to talk to me about?

This harebrained scheme?

It's not a harebrained scheme.

It's a vacation. I need a vacation.

You are not taking my son
to Europe on a vacation.

That's not a vacation,
traveling with Robie by yourself.

I enjoy Robie.

So do I, so leave him with
me and go on a vacation.

No, I want to take him with me.

You'd have to take all
that baby crap with you

and who wants to do
that? I want to do that.

You're not doing that.

You can't take him out of the country.

Why are you so hot to get
out of the country, anyway?

Are you running away from something?

Something that requires
leaving the country?

Yeah. I committed a crime, George.

(CHUCKLES) And I'm on the lam.

That's how I came up with
this harebrained scheme.

Well, don't go on the lam over there
in Europe. They hate us over there.

No, they just don't like
loud, obnoxious Americans

who have no interest
in any other culture.

Like me?

You know, we're not the only
country in the world, George.

That doesn't mean you have to see
the other countries with our son.

I just want to go to Paris,

or maybe Milan or someplace
else. I don't know.

With a baby? Yes, with Robie.

He's the only family member I feel
close enough to talk to right now.

I, uh, let Amy take off
and I don't have a car.

I was going to hang out with John,

but I guess I could
call a taxi or something.

I'll take you home.

Maybe I'll even take you
home and wait for Amy.

I want to have a word with her.

I'm sure you do,

but I think whether Anne
told you she's going to Europe

over dinner or right here,
you'd be just as upset, so...

So, I would rather have
a big fat steak for dinner

with the bad news instead
of a hotdog, all right?

(CHUCKLES) All right.

What is wrong with
her, anyway? With Amy.

I don't know. Maybe it's just hormonal.

All that stuff about periods.

That's just one big old wives'
tale. Don't believe any of it.

It's no excuse for any craziness.

Okay, well,

you mind letting me
handle this with Amy?

I know she's your daughter

and I know you're upset with her,

but she's going to be my wife. I hope.

I don't know if I want
to be a wife and a mother.

I don't know if I'm ready
to be a wife and a mother.

But you're already a mother.
And you're a good mother.

I try, Lauren. I try.

I love John, and I love Ricky
and I want to marry Ricky,

but right now I just
want to have some fun.

I mean, is it a crime to want to
have some fun when it's summer,

the last summer we'll
ever have in high school?

I miss Madison.

What? Nothing.

I mean, it's the summer before
my senior year of high school.

I should be going to
the beach with my friends

and hanging out at the mall and dating,

and just having fun.

(SCOFFS) Like me?

Yes. Like you. And like everyone else.

Are you kidding?

I'm not having any fun this summer,

and I don't know anyone that
is having any fun this summer.

Well, except maybe Ben.

Ben?

Yeah. Ben's obviously in love.

(CHUCKLES) With that
pothead? No, he isn't.

Are you sure you're not just having
second thoughts about getting engaged?

No, I'm not having second
thoughts about getting engaged.

Just second thoughts
about getting married.

And it's not even that, really,

because I want to get married someday.

I just don't want to have to get married

before I'm ready to get married.

You haven't felt like you had to
get married in the past two years.

What makes you feel like
you have to get married now?

Other than you said you would.

Oh, no.

I'm late.

(SIGHS)

+

You thought it was just
gonna be the two of us?

BEN: I didn't really know.

But I'm happy you both would
sit down and talk to me.

I'm really interested in Dylan

and I think I can make a
good case for our going out,

and I'm happy to present
my case to both of you,

although, yes,

I thought you'd be at
work this evening, sir.

That's what Dylan had told me.

I came home from work early.

We like to double-team.

We're a united force.

Do you feel you really
need a united force?

I mean, it's just me.

I'm harmless. I promise.

You're not entirely harmless
unless you've been neutered.

I have not been neutered,

but at this point, I might
be willing. (CHUCKLES)

That doesn't really amuse me, Ben.

In fact, it scares me
that you're that desperate

to go out with my ughter, and
you hardly know my daughter.

And we hardly know you or your family.

That was a poor attempt at a joke.

I sincerely apologize.

And that's why I'm here.

So you can get to know me.

And I'm not really
desperate. I'm just...

I'm smitten.

Really?

Here's the thing.

Even considering the events of my
life over the past couple of years,

or maybe especially considering

the events of my life over
the past couple of years,

I actually think I'm less
of a thr*at to your daughter

than other guys she might
choose to go out with.

Is this another attempt at a joke?

No, not at all.

And you arrived at that conclusion...

I'm just interested.

I've had the opportunity to
learn a lot of life lessons,

the kind of life lessons
that few guys my age

have had the misfortune to learn.

Interesting.

Although you've probably learned
a lot of life lessons about

sex.

And you can't unlearn those lessons.

That's what worries us about you.

Among other things.

I have also learned that
sex has real consequences

and that high school may be too early

to be dealing with those consequences.

And I don't want to be in a sexual
relationship again for a long, long time.

And a long time would
be four or five years?

At which time you might
be ready to get married?

Might. Yes.

I'm curious.

Are your parents divorced?

My mom actually passed
away a long time ago

when I was in elementary school.

Oh, we're so sorry to hear
that. Dylan didn't tell us.

And your dad never remarried?

No. Um...

He actually remarried
a couple of years ago.

So, where's his wife?

Why haven't we met your stepmother?

Uh...

They're actually going through
a divorce. Not his fault.

Betty is a lovely woman,

but my dad waited until years
after my mom d*ed to date again,

and, well, he may not have

chosen the right woman
for a lifetime commitment.

Betty came from a rough background.

She left school at an early
age and got mixed up with some

bad boyfriend, and, well...

When my dad found her she was kind of...

She was just kind of in a bad place.

But once they got married

and she was in a better
place, she just decided

she wanted to be on her own again,

and go back to college
and my dad decided

to help make all her dreams come true.

What bad place was she
in when he found her?

I beg your pardon?

You said she was in a bad
place. Your stepmother.

So, you've been following
me around, taking pictures.

Just thought I'd like
to have some snapshots

of me and my girlfriend?
Something like that?

Yeah. Something like that.

But not that. Not that.

Betty knew I was in love
with Camille when she left me.

She left me. I didn't leave her.

I'm not worried about whether
you left her or she left you.

I'm worried that Betty is not
receiving her fair share of

Boykewich International.

That was determined and agreed
to before we got married.

But tell me.

What do you estimate
her fair share would be?

I don't know.

Without looking at the
books, I'd have to guess.

Take a guess. What do
you think it should be?

Say two or three,

four million dollars. How much?

Why don't we compromise
and make it three?

Three million. Yeah.

And you get what percentage
of that? Percentage?

Well, guys like you generally
work on a percentage, right?

Right. Fifty?

That's between me and my lovely client.

Okay, well, I'll tell you what.

I'm going to make a check
out for three million dollars.

And I'm going to make
the check out to Betty.

And if Betty's the woman I think she is,

that I always thought she was,

she's not going to cash this check

and you're not going to get
a dime for all your troubles.

If she cashes the check,
she cashes the check.

And I'm not the judge of
character that I thought I was

and she's nothing but
a prost*tute after all.

Either way, you don't come
anywhere near me again, or Betty.

I'll have the check
sent to her by messenger.

And after that, I'll be watching you.

If she cashes the check, you get paid.

If not, you don't get paid

and you crawl back into
whatever hole you crawled out of.

Pleasure meeting you.

Wish I could say the same. Good night.

Who was that?

You don't want to know.

No, I do.

Hey, Nate!

Take this over to Betty.

I talked to her earlier.
She's waiting for my call.

But I'm not gonna call
her. Just take that to her.

Right away, sir.

Dad?

All right, all right.
Betty got herself a lawyer.

She's not happy with the settlement?

No, he's not happy with the settlement.

But I don't want to discuss it.

I'm sure it's going to be fine.

Yeah, sure it is.
You being a smart-ass?

Dad, don't forget who Betty is.

Who is she?

Well, for one, she's your ex-wife.

And a perfectly nice woman.

What? Nothing, Dad. You're right.

Betty is a perfectly nice woman.

So, Dylan's parents
didn't let her go out?

No. They didn't.

You seemed pretty certain
you could make your case.

What happened? Oh, I don't know.

My case just suddenly fell apart.

Well, you're a good man for trying,

but, Ben,

sometimes your mistakes have
a way of catching up with you.

And when your friends stick
by you through your mistakes,

you stick by them
through their mistakes.

You're not going to
use this moment in time

as an opportunity to try
to get me to call Henry.

Henry is not my friend. I
thought he was, but he's not.

Look. I don't want to talk about
it. I'll just say good night.

Good night, then.

+

Where is Mom? When's
she going to get here?

She missed her connecting flight

and then the flight she was
connecting on was late taking off,

so I think it's going to be a while.

Okay, well, call me when she gets here.

Wait. Why don't you wait with me?

You don't want to hang out
with your little family, do you?

Aren't you bored of them or
tired of them, or something?

I was, but they're
going to be gone soon.

Really? Really.

I think someone might
be getting married.

Ugh! Rachel's going to marry Milton?

Milton's a great guy.

No, he isn't.

How would you know? You haven't
been out with a great guy since Jack.

See you.

See you.

JACK: Hey, free concert
tonight at the park.

Be there or be square.

If I don't pick up, I can't
hear you over the music.

Hey, I just thought of something.

What if Mom's late

because she's bringing
our brother with her?

No, no, no, no, no. She is not
bringing our so-called brother with her.

She's not. Believe me.

She needs more time
to get used to the idea

of us having a brother, and so do we.

I don't. I don't need any time.

Well, I do.

Not going to change anything. Time.

Time changes everything.

It doesn't change that we have
a brother we never knew about.

You know, I actually thought

that I k*lled Dad by having sex

and then I find out that every year

he's going on these
missions and cheating on Mom!

I mean, it makes me sick!

Our brother can't
help who his father is.

Call me when they get here.

There's no "they." It's just Mom.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Hello? Hey.

I thought you were at
the park, at the concert.

No, I was just letting you
and everyone else think that.

I was trying to sound as if I had
an interesting life or something.

What's up?

You want to have sex?

I'll be right over.

So much for swearing off boys.

Come on, we gotta get up.

Mmm. No, we don't.

No, we do.

I told Daniel we'd
meet them for a movie.

We'd meet him and that girl?

Hey, you didn't say slut this time.

I knew it. You two are
gonna end up being friends.

No, we're not.

Okay, you're not. It doesn't matter.

I told him we'd meet them.

I don't want to meet them. I
didn't tell you we'd meet them.

Yeah, I know. Let's go.

(WHINING) But I thought
we were having a good time.

We were having a good time,

but we can't just stay in bed all night.

Yeah, we can.

Adrian, I love having sex with you,

but there's got to be more to
the relationship than just sex.

Okay, so,

how does going to a movie with a few
friends resolve that issue for you?

It's being with friends, enjoying
something other than sex together.

Well, we can go out and be with friends

and enjoy other things
besides sex together,

but it's really all about the sex.

(CHUCKLES)

Okay, well, if you want a relationship
to last more than a year or two,

you're going to have to get
interested in something other than sex.

Hey, I know what.

Maybe we should go down to the park,

take your mind off things

and maybe then something will happen.

Maybe you are just late.

Maybe you need to get up
and move around or something.

You know? Get your
mind off things, relax.

How can I relax?

I don't know, Amy. How can
you possibly be pregnant again?

I'll tell you how, Lauren.

Once we got engaged, Mr. Ricky
decides that he'll stop using condoms

because, after all, we're engaged,

we're getting marrie and I'm
on birth control pills anyways.

We've always used condoms, except
for that one time at band camp,

so I thought it might be
nice not to use condoms,

so we haven't been using condoms.

Well, that was stupid.

I'm sorry.

We're friends. We're best friends,

so maybe I shouldn't have said that.

But, Amy, you're engaged to Ricky,

and he is going to be
your husband someday.

And he is the father of
your baby, or maybe babies,

so maybe you're talking
to the wrong person.

Maybe you shouldn't be talking to me.

Maybe you should be talking to him.

No, I do not want to talk to him.

No, Amy, this time you can't wait.

This time you're gonna
have to talk to him.

+

Why do you have to give him
a reason for going? Can't you just go?

What, take Rubby out of the
state with his promision?

I don't think so.

Do you have a reason for going?

(SIGHS) Not a good reason, no.

I just want to go.

But of coue, George thinks I'm
running away from something.

Something like...

Probably something like

being gay.

He's going to come home, see us talking

and go right back to that.

And you're not gay.

You know, the more times
you say you're not gay...

I'm not gay! Oh. Okay.

All righty.

Uh, well, I'll just be
getting Ricky and John

and going home. Where are they?

Your dad took them home hours ago.

I think he's still over
there at your apartment.

Yeah, hours ago.

Because, you know, we
didn't end up going out.

We got in a big fight

and I came back here, too. To apologize.

But your father's not
here. He's with Ricky.

Yeah. Um, I'm sorry about
before. I'm just having a bad day.

So everyone else is supposed
to have a bad day, too?

Um, no.

And I don't want to make it any worse,

so I'm just going to go now.

And I'm really sorry about before.

Really, I should have
just stayed and helped out.

Sorry. Good night. Is something wrong?

Something we want to know about?

I want to know. You don't want to know.

Nothing's wrong. Good night.

Why don't I want to know?
Do you know something?

Why do you know everything
and I don't know anything?

(CHUCKLES) That's funny.

George said you're like that,

always thinking you're out of the loop,

but I don't know anything, really.

Ricky thinks Amy's
either feeling confined

or it's something hormonal.

And why don't I know that?

I don't know, Anne.

I talk to my son. He
likes talking to me.

Everyone likes talking to me.

Even you.

Could be some sort of
mid-life crisis, you know,

reevaluating who you are and
what you really want out of life.

What could?

Thinking you might be gay.

I think that I'm a little bit young
to be having a mid-life crisis.

And I am not thinking I'm gay.

Okay.

Sorry, but you are
definitely looking at me.

And so in protecting myself

when I didn't have anyone to protect me,

I think I came to be
slightly confrontational,

and that might be a good
quality for a lawyer.

I mean, I like to argue

and I'm a pretty good liar

and I have no problem making
a case for what I believe in...

I'm still talking.

Keep talking. I love hearing
you talk about yourself.

(SCOFFS)

Well, that's a line
if I've ever heard one.

(CHUCKLES)

All right, Counselor, if
what you want is the truth

and nothing but the truth,

it just turned me on that you
really can have a conversation

about something other than sex.

I like hearing you talk

and I like knowing that
you're serious about school

and about studying.

It just makes you all the sexier.

Really? Really, Adrian.

Okay.

So, anyway, when I met my father

and I realized he was a
prosecutor, I couldn't believe it.

I mean, maybe it's genetic,

maybe it's just in my blood.

Could be. It's something that you

were interested in before
you found out who he is.

So you're talking, too?

'Cause I already find you sexy.

Go ahead.

I haven't talked to a
guy like this since...

Never mind. Where was I?

Hey.

What took you so long?

I had to stop by the drugstore.

You didn't have to stop by the
drugstore. I have protection.

I prefer to use my own
brand and not someone else's.

Are you sure about this?

No. I'm sorry!

I wasn't even really
sure when I called you.

The only thing I'm sure of
now is that we shouldn't do it.

We really shouldn't do it. What?

I know, I was... I was angry.

I started thinking about
it, and I realized that

I was angry the first time we did it.

I was angry at my dad then

and I'm just angry at my dad now

and I think that's the reason why
I wanted to have sex with you again,

and the more I thought about it,

it's just not a good reason at all.

Yeah, I thought you might
be angry with your dad.

We weren't supposed to say anything.

Your mom really shouldn't have told Tom.

Yeah, tell me about it.

I'm sure you must be really upset.

Maybe we should go
upstairs and talk about it.

You're probably exhausted
and it's getting late.

That's completely and totally lame.

I know. I know.

I'm sorry. I should have
just called you back.

No, it's all right. I
can handle disappointment.

I can. If I have to.

You have to. All right.

Do you want me to wait here with you?

I would love it if
you wait here with me.

So, is your brother
coming back with your mom?

She said he wasn't.

Then I'm sure he's not.

I'm not sure. I'm not
sure about anything.

That's good. Confusion is good.

Sometimes. When?

When a guy is trying
to get a girl into bed.

Friends?

We keep saying we'll be friends,

but I don't know if that's possible.

Maybe. Maybe.

Someday.

Yeah, Grace. Someday.

But I'd still always
want to have sex with you.

WENDY: Knock knock.

Hi. I hope you don't mind if we drop by,

King Boykewich.

Feel free to call me Mister.

Mr. Boykewich, we came over

because Dylan can't come over

and she really wanted us to talk to you

and we didn't have a number for you

but, of course, we already
know where you live.

Yes, you do.

What'd she want you to talk to me about?

I said Ben could go out with her.

Her parents won't let
her go out with Ben.

You were, uh,

married to a hooker? I beg your pardon?

Apparently, that's where the
talks fell apart tonight with...

Pudding Pop.

He couldn't believe you
were married to a hooker.

They couldn't. But mostly him.

Pudding Pop?

We sometimes have nicknames
for people we love.

Like you, King! I am the King.

Oh, I knew we could make you say it.

Sorry, but...

Well,

I think everyone knows
that as scary as you are,

you're really nice.
Just like Dylan's dad.

And that's why she's so sure

that you and her parents
can work something out.

Look, I don't know

where Mr. Pudding Pop
heard that I was married

to someone who was like that,

but it's really none of his business.

Um, Ben made it their
business. He told them.

They're very good at interrogation.

That's probably why
Dylan is so good at lying.

That's good to know.

He has a personal
security company, you know.

I'm aware.

Well, thanks for stopping by.

Ben's friends are welcome here any time.

Just about any time. Just not right now.

Thank you for seeing us.

Yeah, thank you. We
really appreciate it.

Before we go, I'd just like to say that

we think Ben is really nice

and Dylan is crazy over him

and she's our really best friend

and we would do anything for her,

including stupid stuff like this.

And stupid stuff like smoking pot.

BOTH: Good night.

(SIGHS)

Is Dylan here?

Did she just leave? Is she
here? Whose car is that?

She's not here. Her friends were here.

You told her parents I was
married to a prost*tute?

I said Betty was forced into a
life of Internet prostitution,

but is a very nice woman,

a woman who wants to go back and
reclaim those years that she lost

when she would have gone to college

by going to college.

Look, people just don't understand, Dad.

We know Betty, but they don't know Betty

and we may not care about
who she is or what she's done

but it just doesn't sound that good.

So, look, I'm sorry.

I meant no disrespect to Betty.

And you know what,

I'm sure Dylan's dad isn't
exactly perfect himself. He's...

He's a... He's a Pudding Pop.

And you know what, if we're
not good enough for them, son,

then they're not good enough for us.

You and I are decent people.

And you know what? So is Betty.

Or at least I hope she is.

I really hope she is.

Did you say Pudding Pop?

(DOOR OPENING)

Mmm.

Sorry I'm late.

Yeah, about time you
got home, young lady.

What time is it, anyway?

Sorry, Dad, for causing problems

at home tonight with you and Mom.

And I would like to offer to babysit
at any other time that you need me.

I guess you two can deal with whatever
it is that we're dealing with here.

You could be right.

Night, Amy. Mom's at home.

She's waiting for you.

She is? Yeah.

Why the hell didn't she call me?

I don't know. She's just
hanging out with Nora.

Aren't you going to
say, "She's not gay"?

Night.

I'm glad you're home. Are you okay?

Yeah. I guess you could say that.

What were you right about?

No, if I say it, you're just
going to get upset with me again.

I know I've been a little moody tonight.

(SIGHS)

I'm just really tirednd...

I've got school tomorrow.

And you're crying about
that? About school?

Geez, Amy, if summer school
is so upsetting to you,

then just drop out.

What is it?

You just don't want to
admit that you were ong

and it wasn't the best idea?

No, no, that's not it.

I just need to get some sleep.

All right. Then get some sleep.

I'm going to go see John
and get ready for bed.

Okay.

(SIGHS)

Amy!

You're not...

I'm late.

+

Where the hell have you been?

You can't talk to me like
that. You're not my wife.

But maybe you could be my wife's wife.

Shut up. I don't want
to be anyone's wife.

Especially your wife's wife.

She's in my room. Ashley's in her room.

You're in your room and
I'm here. Good night.

Come on!

How was your evening? Fine.

My evening was fine.
And how was your evening?

Boring as hell.

Anything happen? Anything
like what, George?

I know what I saw.

Oh, you poor man. You saw
nothing. You know nothing.

So why's Anne running away?

Because she just wants
to go on a vacation.

With a baby. With your baby.

Okay, you need to get some sleep.

And you should encourage Anne

to take a little break, go on a
vacation wherever she wants to go.

She's a nice woman. She's a
tired woman. She deserves a break.

So, you like her.

Get out.

Oh!

No.

No. No, no, no.

Forget what I said. Say
nothing to him. Go back to bed.

You think? I know.

Good night.

And if I don't see you before
you leave, have a great trip.

Thanks, Nora.

Any time.

(CHUCKLING)

Hi, Leo!

Hi, Betty.It's kind o.

Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

Do you have company?

I do not have company, no.
But tomorrow is a workday.

I just wanted to come by and
thank you in person for the check.

Oh. Oh, Leo.

You've made me so happy,
you know, to just do that.

You know, write a check like that,

you know, after all
that you've done for me.

I mean, you completely
turned my life around

and I just want you to know
that I'm spending the summer

getting my place settled

and I'm all registered
for the new fall semester

and I'm going to take a little vacation

down to Daytona Beach with my sisters.

And I just have such a
wonderful life because of you.

Uh-huh. And?

Besides all the material
stuff that you've given me,

you've also given me a reason
to feel really good about myself.

How's that? Oh, Leo, come on.

You know I was just testing you, right?

You know, I just really
wanted to see if you

thought as much of me as you claim to.

What?

I want you to take your check back.

You want to know why?

Why? Because you didn't sign it.

And you knew that I would catch that.

It's because I'm so smart. (CHUCKLING)

I'm just kidding.

That's funny.

You always did have a
great sense of humor.

I always thought
you're a very nice lady.

Aw.

Thank you, Leo.

Good night.

Maybe I'll see you around campus.

Hope so.

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

No caller ID, huh?

This better not be you, Ben Boykewich,
calling at this time of night.

It's not Ben. It's me, Leo Boykewich.

And I got news for you, Mr. Pudding Pop.

My ex-wife is not a prost*tute.

Dad, was that Ben?

Dad, you didn't hang up on him, did you?

How does Mr. Boykewich know
that your little friends

call me Pudding Pop?

I don't know. I guess Ben told them.

Are you sure your
friends didn't tell him?

Well, I can't be completely sure, no.

You can't go out with
this guy, Dylan, you can't!

He got a girl pregnant.
He's getting a divorce.

His dad was married to a woman
who used to be a prost*tute.

Well, it sounds bad when
you put it like that.

But Ben is...

The kind of guy who likes people

and thinks people are
nice and that life is good.

And he's kind and considerate.

And he's cute and he's funny.

And he tries to do the
right thing. He really does.

And so does his dad. Mr.
Boykewich is a nice man.

Can't you see that?

Can't you look past the
facts for once and see that?

Pudding Pop?

I got it.

Where did you go?

You could have gotten that
at the gas station, silly.

Silly? Like I would go
somewhere in the neighborhood

where people might see me
and rumors would start flying

and it would be all over
school by noon tomorrow?

Thank you for caring so
much about me. And us.

Oh, I don't need it.

What? Everything's fine.

You...

(SIGHS) Yeah. I guess I
was just a little late.

And I was probably just a little anxious

since you made that idiotic suggestion

that we could do without the condoms.

Shouldn't we be able to
do without the condoms?

What if my birth control
fails for some reason?

Yeah, what if. You're right.

We should take every
precaution we can take.

Because I do not want any more children

before we get married and
we're ready for more children.

Can I get you some ice cream?

(LAUGHS) Is that your way of saying

you don't want any more children?

I don't know.

One is fine with me.

Me, too.

Love you. I love you, too.

Nice to meet you, Grace.

I'll be at Adrian's.