Look, people are
lining up to get in.
That's right, Father.
Customers are aligning up...
Lining up because
Eric Matthews
called a little lady
named Holly Wood
and arranged for all these
nice people to meet TV's bear.
What show
was he on again?
Oh, I don't know.
Grizzly Adams, Gentle Ben,
National Geographic.
It doesn't really matter.
See, this bear's been on TV.
He's famous.
People love that.
Excuse me, Mr. Matthews.
I'd like to take care of
the business end up-front.
Oh, yeah.
Well, what did my partner
and Miss Holly Wood agree on?
$ , .
That's a lot of money.
Well, it's not just any bear.
It's a TV bear.
Well, I mean, there are
a lot of people outside,
and if everybody leaves
with a pair of socks,
I guess we're okay.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
The plan isn't to have those
people come in here, is it?
Well, yeah, that's the
whole point of the plan
is have all those people
come in here,
meet the TV bear,
and, you know, buy stuff.
Buy lots of stuff.
Well, that's not
going to happen.
You see, this bear
can't be around people.
That's a TV bear.
Isn't it trained?
You can't train a bear.
(SIGHS) Eric, $ , .
Fix this. Now.
Okay.
Okay, I happen to have
seen this very bear
on an episode of
Little House on the Prairie.
Well, sure, he's great
with little children.
Okay, fine, then we can have
the little children come in
and play with the bear.
Oh, I wouldn't do that.
Didn't your partner
fill you in on
any of the particulars?
No. No, he didn't.
Well, first,
we need another $ ,
for the female bear.
Eric, you cost me
five grand.
Yeah, but, Dad,
look, I mean,
we got a bear.
It's a gentle,
meek TV bear.
(ROARING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
Now you've done it.
Ralph, no. No, down.
Eric, get out of here.
Why? I work here.
Not anymore.
Not the shoe!
Heel! Ow!
Alan, this isn't
the first time
Eric has messed up
at the store.
You've given him
enough chances.
You had to let him go.
Well, that's
what I did, Amy.
I let him go.
I don't want you
to let Eric go.
I love Eric.
No, sweetie, he's not
leaving the house.
I just fired him
from work.
Would you ever
fire me, Dad?
Oh, never, princess.
I just hope Eric
understood you.
I mean, he knows
how much you love him.
You would never
do anything to hurt him,
but there is something
called tough love,
and he has to learn
his lesson.
Well, Amy, I was tough.
I made it very clear
to him he was fired.
Come on, Daddy-o,
got to get to work early,
get out that bear stink.
Whoa, whoa.
Eric, are you going to work?
Uh, Mom, yeah.
Put a little food
on the table,
keep you in pretty things.
Let's go, Pops.
Oh, one thing.
One thing, before I forget.
I got to take an early lunch
and then not come back at all,
because I met
a really nice girl
and I'm going to have
a second lunch with her.
(LAUGHS)
Working for your dad
is so great.
Eric, you're fired.
Uh, yeah, came up.
Let's go, Pops.
No, Eric, I'm serious.
You're fired.
You can't fire me.
You're the mama.
I work for the dada.
Ain't that right, Dada?
Daddy?
Da?
You really don't
help yourself, pal.
Here.
What's this?
It's a...
It's a list
of colleges.
Yes, that is where I want
you and Topanga to go.
Even if I'm not
going to school,
the three of us
should still be together.
Okay, "University
of Italy."
Good old
U of It.
Yep. You guys hit the books.
You're studying hard.
Meanwhile,
I'm out in the sun
taking tourists around
in my big canoe.
It's called a gondola.
And that is why
you're going to college.
CORY: Wait, Shawn,
Shawn, Shawn, Shawn.
You've worked too long
to throw it all away
now, okay, buddy?
Why don't you take
the SATs? I bet
you'll do really well.
Fine, fine, I'll take
your little test.
What's minutes
of my life, right?
Ten minutes? Shawn,
they take at least...
(BLABBERING)
Shawn, listen.
You know, I bet
if you take
Feeny's review course,
I bet you could
knock them out
in five, slugger.
No. Too much school,
too much Feeny. Bye-bye.
I am going
canoe shopping.
There are so many times
I should've fired Eric,
but I didn't.
I would have been admitting
that I was a lousy boss.
Or worse, a lousy father.
Oh, Alan, how can you look
at Cory and Morgan
and think you're anything
but the best father?
Well, then why am I
having such a difficult time
with Eric?
It's not like
I did anything
different with him.
We did everything different.
We both did.
I mean,
he's our firstborn child.
We coddled him.
Oh, I didn't
coddle him.
But Eric's very different
than Cory and Morgan.
He needs to be protected.
You really think
that's going to help him?
Yes, I do.
You really think that?
Yes.
Would you be willing
to listen to
someone else's opinion
and not overreact?
Eric is lazy.
George, that's my son
you're talking about.
Mom. Dad.
Feeny, you know
the reason I signed up
for your SAT prep course
is to prep,
possibly even review.
But you've gone
way beyond that,
haven't you?
Too much work for you,
Mr. Matthews?
Oh, I'll do it.
I'm not
afraid of you, Feeny.
You remember that
while I'm in the kitchen
working
and watching you.
Mom, Dad.
We'll talk to him.
He shouldn't
talk to you like that.
No, no, I like
his determination.
Cory works hard
for his grades.
And Eric?
Eric could get
passing grades in his sleep.
In fact, he did.
Which is a shame,
because I'd be hard-pressed
to come up with
a handful of students
who are brighter, wittier
or smarter than Eric.
So you're saying
that Eric is smart?
Mmm-hmm.
Good.
See, Alan? Now we know
we haven't come down
too hard on him,
and he is capable
of reaching
our expectations.
Why are you dressed
in a security guard costume?
It's not a costume.
It's my uniform.
I finally found my calling,
law enforcement.
You proud of me?
You took a job
as a security guard?
Why would you possibly
want to do that?
Oh, only for
about reasons.
One, walkie-talkie,
two, partner, three, dog,
four, partner.
Sometimes
we switch partners.
Five, you want me
to keep going?
Six, I pack heat.
(GASPS)
You carry a g*n?
Nope, a heater.
It gets cold out there
in the shed.
Eric, you could do
anything in your life.
Wait a second.
I don't get this.
Look, you fire me
from one job, I go out,
I get another job.
What do you want?
Dad, get her off my back.
No, your mother is right.
We are tired of you
taking the easy way out.
From now on,
the free ride is over.
Oh. Okay, good,
Mom got to you, too.
That's great,
that's great.
How about you, Mr. Feeny?
What do you think?
Am I taking
the easy way out?
Oh, God,
not another question.
Yes, Eric, I do.
Ah. Great.
That's great.
Well, I'd love to stay here
and, you know,
debate with you guys,
but I'm late for work.
Oh, and another thing.
Don't wait up
for me tonight.
I won't be coming home.
I'm moving out.
Okay, here he comes.
Okay, Cory, give me
another one of those
tough SAT questions.
Okay, here's a doozie.
Kept me up most of the night.
"Which of
these ingredients
"does not help you
make mud?
"Dirt,
"water,
"or turkey?"
Turkey.
Correct.
Wow, Shawn, I didn't
even know that one.
That came from
Feeny's prep course?
Well, it was only
one of the tougher ones.
Let me see that book.
Uh, see, Mr. Feeny?
(STAMMERING)
Right here,
after the question,
"Which is sweeter,
sugar or salt?"
Sugar.
Wow, two in a row.
Where are my glasses?
See, what we're
doing, Mr. Feeny,
is we're just trying
to show Shawn
that through
your review course,
a student builds
a certain level
of confidence
through a series of
not-quite questions.
It's really
this basic?
Shawn, I don't want
anyone misleading you.
My prep course involves
a lot of hard work.
Oh, then I don't
want to do it.
But it's fun.
Tell him, Mr. Feeny.
Tell Shawn about
the carnival-like
atmosphere
of your prep course
so that Shawn will join us.
No.
(SOFTLY)
Come on, Mr. Feeny.
I mean, if Shawn doesn't
get into college,
he starts
washing windows,
playing lotto.
Then he loses his teeth,
becomes a ward
of the state,
and moves in with you.
Well...
If I tell him
about the
cake,
well, then everyone will
want to take the class.
Cake?
Yes, cake.
Delicious cake,
actually,
from the
Westchester Bakery
is where
we get the cakes.
It's
where we get them.
Really? What else?
What, cake's not enough?
Fine, uh...
And then we have a
talent show
some nights.
Oh, this is amazing.
Cory, why didn't you
tell me any of this?
Mr. Hunter,
in between the hoopla,
there will be
learning going on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cake, right?
Yes, cake.
Thanks a lot, Mr. Feeny.
You did the right thing.
(SIGHS) I suppose.
I mean, after all,
what good is it
if you can't get
the butts in the seats?
Hey, Dad.
Hey, Eric.
It's been a while, huh?
About hours.
Yeah, you know,
it seems longer when
you're out on your own.
Oh, Dad, this is
my partner Ronny Patell.
Hi, it's good
to meet you.
Nice to meet you, Ronny.
It's a very nice store
you have here.
I admire anyone
who runs his own business.
One day, I hope
to do the same.
Yeah, Ronny's cool.
He's letting me crash
with him for a while.
We're going
to be roomies.
Eric told me about
your little family crisis.
I'm very sorry
to hear about the mother
going insane
and throwing people
out of the house.
You know, Ronny,
why don't you
look around a little bit?
Ah!
You're mad
at your mother?
Yeah.
But you're not mad at me?
No.
Well, you should be.
Because as much
as you messed up,
I messed up even more.
I should've fired you.
I should've fired you
a million times.
Dad, Dad, ease up.
We're friends.
Eric, you're a goof-off.
Well, I won't be friends
with you anymore.
You want to know when
I started messing up?
The day you were born.
Did you know that I was
in the delivery room?
The only thing
I remember
is that cute nurse
who slapped me
on the tushie.
I remember Dr. Hodges
gave me these
rubber gloves to put on
to keep everything
safe and clean.
So I put them on,
and then you were born,
and you were
moaning and groaning
like you do now.
(SIGHS) And I did what
every father does.
I counted fingers,
I counted toes.
I looked at you,
and you were healthy
and vital.
And I was happy,
and I kissed your mom.
Why are you
telling me this?
Because it's years later,
and I've just
figured something out.
I've never taken off
those gloves.
Hmm?
I have been treating you
with kid gloves
your entire life.
And it's not
your mom's fault.
It's not Feeny's.
It's mine.
All you did
was love me.
Yeah, and I do.
And I love Cory,
and I love Morgan.
But because
you were the firstborn,
I loved you differently.
I let you get away
with stuff. I let you
take advantage of me,
but I did a lousy job
of preparing you
for the world
that is out there.
Now, one day,
I'm not going
to be around anymore,
and you're going to be
on your own.
Then what?
I did not know
the bosses required us
to have a guard dog.
Well, actually,
they don't,
but I just figure
with a b*at
as rough-and-tumble
as John Adams High,
we could use
a little backup.
It does not appear
to be very ferocious.
What? He's
a trained k*ller.
Isn't that right,
Poppy Seed?
You're a trained k*ller,
aren't you?
Yeah. Yes, you are.
All right.
Listen, I know
this is a sensitive
subject, Eric,
but your mother,
is she back
from the insane?
Oh, R.P.,
my mom's not insane.
And, actually,
next time we talk,
do you think you could
kind of keep that between us?
Ah! I understand.
Thanks.
So, Eric, while
we wait for danger,
will you help me
with my studies?
Yeah, sure,
what do you got there?
I'm trying to get
into college,
and this is the book
that helps you prepare
for the entrance exam.
Wait a second.
I thought you said
that back home
you were, like, an engineer
or something.
Back home,
I am an engineer,
but, here,
they don't know that.
I must start over,
and I'm willing to.
Wait a second.
You've already gone
to college, and now
you want to go again?
I know it's
a lot of hard work,
but anything of value
is worth that hard work.
And in this country,
there are so many
opportunities.
Look at you,
fulfilling your dream
of doing this job.
Security guy.
Wait a second.
You think this is my dream?
Well, it must be.
You are doing it.
Yeah, well,
I mean, look at you.
You're doing it, too.
You're a security guy.
Oh, no, no, no.
I am an engineer,
and soon,
they will know it.
(RUSTLING)
Okay, what was that?
Up, Poppy Seed.
Up, Poppy Seed.
Okay, better,
you pretend to be asleep
and then spring into action
to save me at the last second.
Come on, R.P. This is where
your experience is needed.
(WHISPERING) Come on.
I got your back.
Okay.
(SCREAMS)
Oh, hi, Mr. Feeny,
okay. (GASPS)
You scared the hell
out of me.
I scared you?
You snuck up on me.
Oh.
You know him?
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
he's fine.
Then I'll go back
to my studies.
ERIC: Okay.
All right, Mr. Feeny,
I still got to do this
by the book.
So what are you doing
at John Adams High
after school hours?
SAT prep course,
Mr. Matthews.
And judging from
the hotbed
of criminal activity
raging out here,
I think your time
would be better spent
inside with us.
Take the class?
Well...
(LAUGHS) No, I don't think
I'm going to do that.
What are you
afraid of, Eric?
I'm not afraid
of anything.
No.
You're afraid of something,
and it's stopping you.
Stopping me?
From what?
From becoming
what we all know
you're capable of being.
What I'm capable of,
what I'm capable of.
You know something,
Mr. Feeny,
I'm always hearing that.
What I'm capable of.
I took the SATs
last year, remember?
I blew them.
You know, maybe
I'm just not meant
to be in college.
Maybe you're someone
who gives up too easily.
What'll it be,
Mr. Matthews?
Who are you?
(CHATTERING)
What in heaven's name?
Mr. Feeny,
we've got a few issues
to discuss with you.
Yeah!
We just came from
taking our SATs.
Yeah!
How did you do?
Yeah!
That's why
we're here, sir.
I mean, for more years
than I care to remember,
you have drove us nuts
by filling our heads
with dates and ideas
and numbers and concepts.
Yeah, and with
the last three weeks
of that course of yours,
drilling us,
pushing us to the edge.
Yeah! And making me
eat cake.
Five pounds
right here, baby.
And now that
it's all over
and we've taken the test,
we had to come here
and tell you to your face.
Thanks a lot, man.
We finally understood
why you pushed us so hard.
We're really glad
you did.
Hi, Mom.
Hi, Eric.
You fired me.
I did.
Well, then
I guess I deserved
to be fired
because I know
how much you love me,
and I know it must've
been really hard for you
to fire your son.
I'm just sorry
I let you down.
Thank you, Eric.
And you, you said
something wrong to me.
I was the good guy
in all of this,
and you
turned it around,
didn't you?
Good for you.
See,
you said to me that
there would come a time
where you weren't gonna
be around anymore,
and that's not so.
Eric.
No, no, no, Dad.
I remember everything
that you taught me.
And I'm gonna
turn around,
and I'm gonna teach that
to my children.
(SIGHS) So, you see,
Dad, you're always
gonna be around.
Well, thank you, Eric.
And I remember
that one of the things
that you taught me
was that
I could be anything
that I wanted to be.
Yes, I did.
Do you still
believe that?
Yes, I do.
If you don't take
the easy way out
and try as hard as you can.
Well, I hope
you're right.
Because I tried
as hard as I could.
SAT scores?
You took the test?
I did, and I thought
that we should all
you know, open it together.
(CHUCKLES) Okay.
All right,
here we go.
Now, I didn't take
the easy way out.
I tried as hard as I could.
You tried as hard
as you could?
Yeah, I did.
Well, then,
it's a good thing
you're not working
for your father anymore,
or I'd have to fire you.
What?
.
That's points higher
than last time, Eric.
(GASPS)
(CHOKING)
I'm very proud of you.
I'm very, very proud of you.
I knew you could do it!
I knew I could
do it, too.
Yes!
Mr. Feeny!
Mr. Feeny!
(MANIACALLY) Mr. Feeny!
Hi. It's me, Eric.
What are you doing now?
Well, I was sleeping.
It's something
I've gotten accustomed to
in the middle of the night.
That's cool.
Get dressed.
Are you crazy, man?
Yeah. Yeah, I am.
I got this book of colleges,
and I need you to help me
pick out a good one, okay?
So, come on, get dressed.
Let's go.
First thing in the morning
we'll go a-college pickin'.
No, no, no.
You see, Mr. Feeny,
I really need your help now.
Those spaces,
they're filling up fast.
How about Penbrook?
Well, actually,
that's a very good school.
How about Harvard, any good?
All right, put on the coffee.
I'll meet you in the kitchen.
All right.
Hey, Mr. Feeny.
What?
I heard you told my parents
you thought I was smart.
Just knowing
you said that
was worth about
, SAT points.
04x20 - Security Guy
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A coming-of-age comedy follows Cory as he juggles school, friends and romance.
A coming-of-age comedy follows Cory as he juggles school, friends and romance.