-♪ What would you do
if I sang out of tune? ♪
♪ Would you stand up
and walk out on me? ♪
♪ Lend me your ears,
and I'll sing you a song ♪
♪ I will try not to
sing out of key, yeah ♪
♪ Oh, baby, I get by ♪
- ♪ by with a little help
from my friends ♪
-♪ All I need is my buddies ♪
-♪ High with a little
help from my friends ♪
-♪ I'm sayin' I'm gonna get higher ♪ - ♪
try with a little help from my friends ♪
-♪ Whoa-oa-oa-oa ♪
-♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
-♪ Somebody who
knows quite sure ♪
♪ Baby ♪
-♪ By with a little
help from my friends ♪
-♪ Said I'm gonna make
it with my friends ♪
-♪ Try with a little
help from my friends ♪
-♪ Oh, I'm gonna
keep on trying ♪
-♪ High with a little
help from my friends ♪
-♪ I'm gonna keep on
trying now, baby ♪
-♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
-[Cheering]
-There's one in every
high school in america...
The trophy case,
Filled with winged statues
and silver-plated victory cups,
All monuments to
the winning spirit,
To team play, to
greatness on the field.
[Whistle blows]
Not just anyone could
get inside that case.
[Whistle blows]
You had to be a winner.
-[Growls]
You had to have determination.
-Set! 15! 22! 35!
- You had to have...
- [Growls]
- Guts.
-[Grunts]
[Whistle blows]
- and most importantly...
-Arnold, over here.
- You had to make the cut.
-Yeah, coach?
-You gave it everything
you got today, son.
-Thanks! Does that
mean I make the team?
-You got to be joking.
Hit the showers.
-Hut! Hut!
-That fall of my sophomore
year, one thing was clear.
No matter how hard I tried,
The wide world of sports
wasn't wide enough to include me.
Face it. I was 5'4"
and 110 pounds.
What team could I play on?
And that's when it hit me.
-Sorry. Slipped away from me.
-That's okay. What's this?
-It's a soccer ball. Why?
-Well, nothing. I just
haven't seen many around.
-Keep in mind this was 1971.
Soccer hadn't yet become
the national pastime it is today.
-So, do you play?
-Oh, sure. I kick
it around a little.
-[Chuckles] great.
-Actually, I'm on the team.
-Call it a revelation.
- The team?
- The soccer team.
We started practice yesterday.
-Wait a minute. Our
school has a soccer team?
-New this year.
Pretty cool, huh?
-Consider, if you
will, the thoughts
That ran through my head.
"A," mckinley high had a
team no one knew about,
And, "b"...
This doofus was on it.
- Ow.
-Which led to "c."
-Where do you guys practice?
-Third auxiliary football field
Down by the brook,
through the woods.
Why, you interested?
- "D." It was worth a look.
But what I saw when I got there
Was the biggest
collection of dorks
Since my 4th-grade
cotillion class
Playing on a moth-eaten field
That was halfway
to grandma's house.
This was definitely not for me.
-Hey, you!
Glad you showed up.
We're pioneering the
uncharted universe here.
- Great.
- Uh-huh.
-But, uh...
I don't think I
really... Fit in.
-Why? I think you'd be great.
And, besides, we're
one guy short.
-Yeah, well...
Thanks for telling
me about it, anyway.
-Hey, being on a
team was one thing.
But playing with these jokers?
-Hey, a little help?
Kick it back!
-Wow.
Where did you learn
how to do that?
-What?
-Kick like that.
-I don't know. Lucky, I guess.
-Yeah, well, good sh*t...
Superstar.
-The amazing thing was,
these guys were serious.
-So, you gonna join us?
-And that's when I realized...
In the land of the blind,
the one-eyed man is king.
-Well...
Maybe I'll go talk to the coach.
-Great!
He... He's over
there. Pops mcintyre.
Go ahead.
-[Sighs]
-It was kind of a big moment...
The future superstar
stepping up to the man
Who would shape
his athletic career.
-Coach mcintyre?
-The man with all the answers.
The man...
-You bring my juice?
- Who wanted juice.
-Uh... No.
-Hot as hell out here, isn't it?
-Yeah. It is.
-So, what can I do for you?
-Well, actually, I came
to sign up for the team.
-Why's that?
-Obviously, the
coach didn't realize
He was in the presence
of such raw talent.
-Well, maybe you saw the way
I just kicked the
ball over there?
-Yeah, I saw it.
-On the other hand,
This guy didn't just
want another hotdogger.
He wanted sincerity.
-Listen, I don't know
that much about soccer,
But I'd be willing to
learn and give it my best.
I just want to be
part of the team.
-Is that so?
-And with that, our
bond was forged...
The bond of trust,
admiration, respect.
-So, I guess we'll be
working together.
-Suit yourself.
Where's my juice?!
-No question about it. It
was the dawn of a new era.
-Soccer?
Isn't that where
they use the brooms
To sweep in front
of a little thingy?
-That's curling, mom.
Soccer's where little
boys chase the ball around
In shorts and knee socks.
-Shut up, butthead!
-Well, I'm very
proud of you, honey.
-Thanks, mom.
-Who's coaching?
-Nobody.
-Nobody?
-Well, just some old
guy named mcintyre.
-Mclntyre. Pops mcintyre?
-You know him?
-[Chuckles]
He was only the
greatest football coach
The school ever had.
-Really?
-Sure. Guy was a legend.
Yeah, that guy was
one hell of a coach.
They called him "the bear."
-Hmm.
Hard to believe the man
my father was talking about
Was the same pops mcintyre.
-The bear... Always
pacing, always growling.
He never sat down.
[Bear growls]
-Well, think of it this way.
Maybe the bear was hibernating.
-Pops?
[Clears throat] pops?
Kick it back?
Pops?
Anybody got another ball?
- It just didn't add up.
What was with this guy?
-So, how we doing?
-Fine, fine.
-Well, what do you think
about our prospects
For this season?
-Terrific. Where's my cushion?
I know I left it somewhere.
-At least one
thing seemed clear.
When it came to coaching,
this coach couldn't care less.
Of course, maybe there
was a reason for that.
Take nick bott, for example...
The most uncoordinated
kid I ever met.
Not to mention the
biggest "star trek" fan.
And andy collin. I
never saw a lazier kid.
And who could forget
chuck coleman, "mr. Fidget"?
The kid meant well enough,
But he elevated
annoying to an art form.
-[Grunts]
-And leigh fitzpatrick.
Sweet guy but a
bundle of nerves.
All in all, we were a team
That could most
charitably be described as...
-What the hell was that?
-Do you need some help there?
-Nope. Everything's
under control.
[Sighs]
-Guys, I think we are really
getting good out there!
-Yeah, we only kicked
the ball over the fence
Three times today.
-Dorks, goof balls, a
coach who wouldn't coach.
Somehow, this whole thing
Wasn't working out
the way I'd planned.
-What do you think, kev?
-About what?
-Well, about how
things are going.
-Well...
I don't know, guys.
I mean, I'm new here, but...
Doesn't it seem like
something's missing?
-Missing? Well, like what?
-Well, I mean, we are
playing soccer, right?
So, maybe we should
start learning some plays.
-Of course, it was
only a suggestion.
Still...
-Plays.
Great idea!
-It was like watching
edison invent the light bulb.
-What can I do for you?
-Well... We... We wanted to
talk about learning some plays.
-Plays?
-Look, it's not that
we don't appreciate
What you've done for us so far.
It's just that...
-Plays?
-Well, look. What
about this playbook?
-Well, those are plays.
-Well, can we at
least work from it?
-I don't think that book's
gonna do you a lot of good.
-Still, even pops couldn't
quell the tide of youth...
Enthusiasm...
Dorkdom.
-But...
If you want to learn plays...
Suit yourself.
- Terrific!
- Great!
-Great! Thanks!
-And there you had it.
-Guys, we got plays!
-Sure, it wasn't much,
but it was a start.
And who knew?
Maybe with the right combination
Of coaching and raw talent,
We'd actually make
something of ourselves.
-Okay, 17!
34! Set back!
Okay, 24! Red right!
And... Hike!
-[Screaming]
-Or maybe, just maybe...
It was gonna be the longest
season in recorded history.
After the great
football-playbook fiasco,
Lesser men might
have hung it up.
But for some reason, my
teammates hung in there.
Maybe we were really
trying to get good.
Maybe we were just
trying to get pops
To pay attention to us.
In any event, it wasn't working.
-[Snoring]
[Metal clanging]
-Pretty soon, morale
began to plummet.
Team spirit hit an all-time low.
As for me,
My dreams of glory on the
playing field were fading...
Fast.
[Bell rings]
There was only one thing to do.
-Pops, can I talk to you?
-About what?
-Well, about the team.
The soccer team.
- Oh, that.
-You see...
Our first game's
coming up in a few days.
And...
-How to put this tactfully.
-It's not gonna be pretty.
-[Sighs] yeah.
-It's gonna be a m*ssacre.
-Mm-hmm.
But we still have
time, don't we?
I mean...
With a little practice,
we could at least be...
Respectable.
Don't you think?
-Figured the least he could
do here was throw me a bone.
-I wouldn't count on it.
-Not exactly your basic
ringing endorsement.
-Wait a minute. I don't get it.
My dad told me you used
to be this great coach.
"The bear," they called you.
You won six conference
titles in a row.
-He told you that?
-Yeah.
-Did he tell you
about that '57 team?
[Chuckles] great bunch of boys.
["Notre dame
victory march" plays]
-And for just a second,
I actually saw a spark of
real enthusiasm in the guy.
-Ah, but that was then. My
coaching days are over now.
-W-why?
-They didn't want me.
Got a younger man.
Put me out to pasture
until, uh... Until this.
-I did my best not to
take it personally.
-Yeah, but...
Pops, we're a team,
and we need a coach.
-There... A cry from the heart,
Something even
pops couldn't deny.
-One year away from my pension,
And they saddle me with this.
Soccer.
-Game day.
The good news was
we had new uniforms.
The bad news was...
-Hey. Is it okay if we trade?
8 Is my lucky number.
- Sure.
- We were the same
team inside them.
Still, for some reason...
-Call me crazy, call me naive,
But I think we really
have a chance today.
Come on! Let's go!
- These jokers just
weren't giving up.
-[Chanting "knights"]
-Maybe it was a tribute
to the human spirit,
The power of positive thinking,
The triumph of
will over adversity.
-[Chanting stops]
- Or...
- Oh, my god.
- Maybe it was plain stupidity.
-Are those guys for real?
-Our opponents could have passed
For the italian
national all-stars,
Leaving us only one
small glimmer of hope.
-Maybe it'll rain.
-♪ Ow! ♪
[Whistle blows]
♪ Oh, whoo ♪
♪ Say it, now ♪
-[Whistles]
-♪ Ooh, I'm back ♪
♪ I'm back ♪
♪ I'm back ♪
♪ I'm back ♪
♪ I'm back ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And dance till
you feel better ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
-That afternoon,
we gave it all we had.
-♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And dance till
you feel better ♪
-We threw ourselves into it.
-♪ And try to release
that pressure ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
-We did our dead-level best.
Unfortunately...
-♪ Say it, now ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And shake till
you feel better ♪
- Our dead-level best stunk.
-♪ And try to release
that pressure ♪
♪ Get up off ♪
-Pretty soon, our
problem was clear.
-[Grunting]
-♪ So good ♪
-It was our goalie's fault.
-♪ Whoo! Yeah! ♪
♪ Follow me! ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And shake till
you feel better ♪
-But by halftime...
-♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And shake till, say it now ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ And shake till
you feel better ♪
- We'd run out of scapegoats.
-♪ And try to release
that pressure ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ Twist till you feel better ♪
♪ Get up off of that thing ♪
♪ Unh! ♪
-11-Zip, I can't believe it.
-I hate this stupid game.
-It was horrible.
We were getting
our noses rubbed it in.
Clearly what was
needed here was a pickup,
A pep talk, a little knute
rockne-ian guidance.
-[Sighs]
-I don't want to
go back out there.
-And suddenly, I was seeing red.
-Guys, I got something to say.
-If pops wouldn't
step forward, I would.
-Look, we might not be the best
soccer team that ever played.
In fact, we may not
even be very good,
Or any good... At all.
-Hmm. Possibly I was
on a bad tack here.
-So I say let's forget about
what's happened so far,
And let's start thinking
about what might happen.
Okay?
Let's go!
-And as I ran out of
that locker room,
I had just one thought.
I only hoped someone
was following me.
[Door closes]
[Whistle blows]
When I got back on
that field, I was mad.
-[Sighs]
-I'd take these guys
on myself, if I had to.
-Hey! Wait for us!
[Rossini's "william
tell overture" plays]
-And when that whistle blew...
[Whistle blows]
We actually got
possession of the ball.
-Over here!
-And what's more amazing...
We actually completed a pass.
-Back to me! Back to me!
Go, leigh! Come on!
-[Cheering]
[Whistle blows]
-It was our finest hour.
Unfortunately...
[Squeaking]
We'd kicked the ball
into the wrong net.
-I don't believe it!
You scored on our goal, bozo.
-Don't call me
bozo, spock brain!
-Hey!
-Listen, would you
jerks just break it up?!
- Who you calling a jerk?!
- This is ridiculous!
-Who needs this?!
I don't need this!
-Look, you guys, just calm down!
[Indistinct shouting]
-We completely fell apart.
It was like "lord of the flies."
[Shouting continues]
And that's when it happened.
-Look!
-Pops was heading towards
us to say it was over...
That we had no hope of winning,
That it was time to hang it up.
-[Sighs]
Kick it that way.
-I don't know what it
was that touched him.
Maybe it was the way
we stuck together.
Maybe it was the way
we were tearing apart.
In that brief instant,
Pops mcintyre
became a coach again.
[Thunder crashes]
And we were finally a team.
-Come on, guys. Let's
lose one for pops.
[Thunder crashes]
-Sure, we lost that day,
but it was a glorious defeat.
After all, all over america,
there were teams like ours,
Teams that marched
bravely into slaughter,
Teams that went 0-15
and kept on losing
And kept on trying...
Not for the league titles
Or the silver-plated
victory cups
But just for the
joy of playing...
Together.
[Whistle blows]
The thing is...
I'll never forget those guys...
Even if they were dorks.