03x11 - The Gypsy and the Hobo

[bunniefuu]

Sally! Bobby!

They sell it at Woolworths.

There's a section that says
"Halloween costumes. "

You'll wear it once.
Plus, it's made out of plastic and it's crap.

- I'm always gonna love Minnie Mouse.
- I'm gonna be an astronaut.

Didn't you hear me?
The luggage.

- I'll go get it.
- That's not the point. They don't listen.

There's more? It's a week.

We're going for a week?
Are we gonna miss Halloween?

They have Halloween there.
You'll go with your cousins.

Say goodbye to your father,
then get the bags.

They have a Woolworths in Philly, too.

- I only have $40.
- Swing by the bank.

There should be at least $200
in your checking. That's plenty.

You have no more money?

Take care.

Roger, I think you remember...

- Annabelle.
- You look wonderful.

You look exactly the same.

- This is Annabelle... What is it again?
- Mathis.

I can't tell if you two
know each other or not.

- Don Draper.
- Hello.

Please, Mrs. Mathis, sit.

How the hell were you in town
and not look me up?

I wasn't sure about coming back here.
I'm running the company now.

- You divorced what's-his-name?
- No, David d*ed,

and because of my father's will,
the company went back to me.

- I'm sorry.
- Fifty-one years old. Lung cancer.

That's too bad.

- So...
- So, yes, if you're open to it.

Caldecott Farms, I'm sure you've heard,

had a public relations crisis
followed by disastrous sales.

- I hadn't heard.
- The Misfits, the movie. Clark Gable.

It was about horses
being turned into dog food.

- There was an expos?.
- We were singled out. I don't know why.

You don't know why? She owns
a horse farm that makes dog food.

We had a 15% share of the market,

but now Benton & Bowles
has dropped us for Gravy Train.

Well, that was a mistake.

People eat cow but they call it beef.
Chicken is poultry.

- Pig...
- We got it, sweetheart.

Well, there is no other word for horse meat.
I thought maybe you could invent one.

- What do you think, Don?
- I think it's a tall order.

- Do you have to use horse meat?
- All dog food is horse meat.

People eat it all over the world.
I've eaten it. It's delicious.

- It's like venison.
- I've eaten it.

Well, I'll tell you
what I'm telling the Avenue.

- Best idea gets my business.
- How long do we have?

I'm in town until Friday,
but only the big firms are rushing.

Well, I'm not gonna sit here
and brag about how big I am.

Roger.

Bert, I have two simple rules.

I don't want to change the recipe.
It's all meat.

And two,
my father named it Caldecott Farms.

Don't change the name.
Don't change the product.

- Got it.
- Walk me out?

We had their business before,
but her father was a son of a bitch.

You know, people spend more money
on dog food than baby food.

I'll put the fellas on it.

- Is that really necessary?
- You've never walked in high heels.

No, coming in here.
What are you doing here?

I wanted to see you,
and I need something new.

- I'll bet you do.
- For my business.

Besides, you're married, aren't you?

- I am.
- Still or again?

- You know it's again. Don't get cute.
- I heard she's a teenager.

Probably too jealous to let you
have a business dinner with me.

- Gonna need a reason.
- Because I know you're good at this.

Advertising, I mean.

- Tomorrow night. Somewhere French.
- Avec plaisir.

All the lights were on.
I figured you'd be home.

I knew you were coming over.
Thought it might be dark when I got home

and I didn't want the Mckays
to see you turning on the lights.

That's very thoughtful.

I'm making spaghetti with cream
and butter and cheese.

- And hot pepper?
- Yes.

I had it like that in Little Italy.
I love that place.

Believe it or not,
I get treated very well there.

I wish I could take you there.

I know.

Don, I swear I'm not talking
about our future.

- I entered into this with my eyes open.
- I pushed you.

What does it matter?

Here we are, and I look at your life,

and even if I remove myself
from the picture,

I see a man who is not happy.

I'm happy now.

What?

Okay.

Okay.

I'm going to lie down.
Come get me when you want to.

Why did I decide to leave surgery?
These last few months have been difficult,

but I found a reserve of strength in myself
I didn't know I had,

and I realized there are other ways
to heal people besides cutting them open.

What experience
have you had with psychiatry?

- That's kind of personal.
- Greg, remember what Steve said.

This is a field about
the most intimate details in life.

More intimate than their organs?

You know, I'm curious
why you won't answer the question.

What is your experience with psychiatry?

None personally,
but my dad had a nervous breakdown.

- I didn't know that.
- Yeah, no one was buying furniture.

My mom ran away for two weeks
because he wouldn't get a Christmas tree.

A headshrinker got him through,
but we weren't allowed to talk about it.

Greg, that's wonderful.

- It was a lot of things, Joanie.
- No.

Answer like that.
This is a talking profession.

The way you just were with me right now,
so open, he's gonna love you.

The most important thing
about an interview

is to express enthusiasm
in a believable way.

No self-deprecating humor.

You're smart. You're funny.
You're great to be around,

but you haven't decided
if they're the right one.

- This isn't a beauty pageant.
- Well, I've seen executives crash and burn.

I can't believe I never told you that.

I just

wanted more than I thought I would want.

But it'll pass.

Actually, I know for a fact it will.

I don't want it to pass.

One day I dropped the kids off at school
and I saw you in the yard.

I kept wishing you could get in the car
and drive away with me.

Just let it go.

I'll clear my schedule. We can go to Mystic
or something for the rest of the week.

Mystic?

- I can think of someplace if you're serious.
- I am.

Okay.

Damn it.

- Hello?
- Roger, it's Joan.

- Joan Harris.
- Jesus.

You're lucky I answered. Ginger's not in.

I know. She has a hair appointment
the last Tuesday of every month.

- She does?
- And I know that your lunch canceled.

What am I wearing?

So, how are things?

Mr. Hooker has rearranged
the secretaries in the pool

- alphabetically.
- By cup size?

- Well, I know where you'd be sitting.
- You're making me sorry I called you.

I need a favor. I need help finding work.

- Something happen with Dr. Cut-Up?
- Not at all.

He's pursuing his dream
of becoming a psychiatrist,

but that means more training and I just
don't want him moonlighting all the time.

- Why does it matter?
- It doesn't. None of my business.

- Why don't you come back here?
- Roger, I've been replaced,

and a secretary makes less money
than if I was working at a department store.

I'm so glad you called me.

- I'm sorry it had to be for a favor.
- No.

I like that you thought of me.
You know, to ask.

You want to be on some people's minds.
Some people's you don't.

- That's nice.
- So, do you miss it here?

Are you asking if I miss you?

Well, I guess I am,
because everything else is different.

- I should go.
- Well, how do I work this?

If I think of anybody.
Just give them your number?

Look at you,
figuring things out for yourself.

Bye-bye, Joanie.

Look who's here.

I'm sorry I missed the funeral.
My grandson was graduating.

It was beautiful.

Judy fixed lunch.
We don't have to talk right away.

I don't have a lot of time.

Betty wants to know
what the house is worth.

- I'm a lawyer. I'm not a real estate agent.
- Well, the house was left to both of us,

and I don't understand why I shouldn't
be able to buy it away from her

- at double what Dad paid for it.
- They bought it in the late '20s.

Dad always said
it was the top of the market.

Your father intended you
to get as much money for it as you could,

if you were going to sell it.

Otherwise, somebody
has to buy somebody out.

So, basically Dad gave it to Betty
because he knew I didn't have any money.

This is ugly. You know that?

Milton, I need to speak to you
in confidence.

I need your advice.
I need complete confidentiality.

It's my husband.

I just found out some compromising facts.

He's been married before, and he...

Well, it's not even his real name,
and he bought her a house, his ex-wife.

I need to know what to do.

I don't know him, Betsy.
I met him at your wedding.

I know your father didn't want him
in the will.

- So?
- What do you want to do?

You want a divorce? In New York state,
you need to prove adultery. Can you?

- Maybe.
- I mean prove it in a court of law.

That's hard to do. Unless he wants out,
but you're not gonna get anything.

You won't even be able
to buy William out of the house.

You'll have to sell it.

And he can take the children.

That's my legal advice.
You want the rest of it?

- Are you afraid of him?
- No.

Is he a good provider?

He is, but that's not the point.

It's a lie so big, Milton.

I feel like I've been in some dream
since I found out.

Just saying it out loud to you...
This is the first time

I'm realizing it's true.

You have three small children together.

At least go home, give it a try.

That's what I'd tell my own daughter.

Damn it, Betts! This isn't right!

- Look, he waited.
- This is number three.

What do you want?

I'm going to have one of those lovely wines.

Why did you have two? Are you nervous?

- She'll have one of those lovely wines.
- Bordeaux.

Don wants to call in
a focus group right away.

That's enough business.

I want to know everything that's happened
in the last 20 years.

Longer.

It wasn't until years later that I realized

you were the only person
I could remember that time with.

What do you want to remember?

What I was like at that age.
Paris before the w*r.

Eating in cemeteries.

People were jumping out of windows
and we were on vacation.

I don't remember much.

Are you trying to tell me
when you saw Casablanca

- you didn't think about me?
- You mean Peter Lorre?

You seemed so happy to see me,
and now you're just being drunk.

Look, Annabelle.
We were not in Casablanca.

The only similarity
is that you left me for another man.

When she gets on the plane at the end?

That woman got on the plane with a man
who was going to end World w*r II,

not run her father's dog food company.

You were adrift.
You didn't do anything but spend money.

You walked around like you were hoping
to be a character in somebody else's novel.

The boxing.

I'm not gonna sit here
and listen to your reasons.

Believe it or not, I still remember them.

Jesus, where's the wine?
I don't like the way you're looking at me.

- How am I looking at you?
- With pity.

I finally found a beautiful, carefree girl,
unconcerned about the future.

- I was more serious than you.
- Well, I got mine.

I married Mona, joined the firm,

and then I got shipped off
to the Pacific for the duration.

And when I came home, I went to work
while you were watching Casablanca,

and I got blamed when we lost the account.

All I heard was my father said
Bert Cooper had a screw loose.

Look, you're rich.

Let someone else take your horse meat
and slap their label on it.

And do what?

- I don't want a whole bottle.
- I'll help.

And I told him
the closest we ever got to Hemingway

was sitting in a chair he once sat in.
And that was the '20s, not the '30s.

And then he said he remembered me
because I was the one

- who'd introduced him to peanut butter.
- Yeah, I never understood that.

They had peanuts in Europe.
No one ever thought of that?

- Look at us.
- Will you stop?

Roger, do I look like a widow?

You look great.

You still want me.

So what?

I'm married.

Newlywed, honeymooning.

How could I have missed the window
between Mona and her?

There really wasn't much of a window.

- Kind of overlapped.
- I was there first.

We'll just take this and tack it onto that.

I'm gonna get you a cab.

Are you afraid I'll be disappointed?
You were always good drunk.

Annabelle, let me get you a cab.

It's different with this girl.

I'm sorry.

Good night.

How'd it go?

I screwed up all my answers
and I tried to talk about the articles,

but I couldn't remember anything.
I made a fool out of myself.

- I am sure that's not true.
- You weren't there.

Stop acting like you know everything.

- You'll have other interviews.
- I don't want them.

I don't want to be a psychiatrist.
It's not medicine.

I might as well work at a bank.

I don't care what you do,
as long as you do something.

We need money.

I did everything I was supposed to do.
Everything they told me.

College, med school.

I wanted to be a surgeon
since I was that big.

I'm sorry, Greg.

- Maybe it's time to move on.
- You don't know!

You don't know what it's like
to want something your whole life,

and to plan for it,
and to count on it and not get it! Okay?

Holy sh*t!

What the hell?
You're insane, you know that?

Why isn't he wearing a white coat?
He looks like a dog food salesman.

Dogs don't like uniforms.

Well, we're lucky.
Everyone has an appetite today.

They said we should bring them hungry,
but he does seem to like this.

How would you describe
your dog's temperament?

She's picky, and she's nervous sometimes,

- but she's very smart.
- And yours?

He's independent, you know?

He knows what he likes.
He's pretty hard to fool.

- My God, they're describing themselves.
- This your first group?

What if I told you your dogs
were enjoying Caldecott Farms?

- What's it called?
- I wouldn't like it.

- Bingo, stop.
- I've never heard of it.

Well, you should.
They make it out of ponies.

Goodness gracious, that's this one?

This is the first I'm hearing of this.
I wish you would've told me.

- When people are protesting, I'm onboard.
- Well, what brand does your dog prefer?

- Why would you do this to us?
- It's inhumane.

- Bingo looks sick.
- Turn it off.

- Would you prefer beef...
- Could somebody get that?

- I can't turn it off. It's actually happening.
- Turn off the sound.

I already know how people feel.
It's your job to change that.

Any agency that does not change the name
is stealing your money.

The product is good.
It's high quality, dogs love it,

- but the name has been poisoned.
- That name got us where we are.

- Do you think that was just luck?
- I'm not saying a new name is easy to find,

and we will give you a lot of options,
but it's a label on a can.

And it will be true, because it will promise
the quality of the product that's inside.

Well, I'm gonna wait it out,

and not for these morons,
but for another agency

- to solve my problem.
- Jesus, Annabelle, let it go.

The name is done. It's unfair, but it's over.

- Annabelle!
- Are you ready for the next group?

- I don't like the way you're speaking to me.
- Everybody out.

- Is this about last night?
- I don't even remember last night.

Well, you threw yourself at me
and I turned you down.

I'm right. You want to hurt me.

No. No, I don't.

You want to know if it was a great time?
It was.

Do you want to know
if you broke my heart? Obviously.

Well, it was a mistake.

It's nice to hear,
but it doesn't matter anymore.

It does to me.

When I was burying this man,

all I thought was, I'd have rather
had my heart broken every day by you.

You were the one.

You weren't.

Well, you're lucky you found her.

Goodbye, Roger.

I think it's about four hours to Norwich,
but the Norwich Inn might be a little past it,

and we can check in till midnight.
We'll be fine.

I'll be right out.

Daddy?

- I'll be right back, Salamander.
- Daddy!

- I left my hat in the car.
- Get it later.

I need to talk to you.

- Go upstairs.
- We want to say hi to Daddy.

Upstairs.

You're home early.
What did William do now?

Not right now, Don.

Why didn't you just call the office?

I came home to feed the dog
and change shirts.

- I have a client dinner in the city.
- I need to show you something.

- What's going on?
- Open this drawer.

Betts, that's my desk.

Open the drawer or I will.

Fine.

Betty, this is my desk. It's private.

Where did you get these?

You left them in the pocket
of your bathrobe,

but I could have had a locksmith
in here anytime I wanted.

I respected your privacy too long. Open it.

No.

You know I know what's in there.

I can explain.

You didn't have to look at my things.

Which things, Don?

The pictures covered
with other people's names?

Is that you? d*ck? Is that your name?

People change their names, Betts.

- You did.
- I did. I took your name.

And so did this Anna woman,
whoever she is.

- I can explain.
- I know. I know you can.

You're a very, very gifted storyteller.

Betts, I...

I need a drink.

Are you thinking of what to say
or are you just looking at that door?

I'm not going anywhere.

I'll get you a drink. Just sit down.

You bought her a house.

Where do you want me to start?

- What's your name?
- Donald Draper.

- But it used to be d*ck Whitman.
- And who's that woman? Your other wife.

It wasn't romantic.

I ended up married to her
because I ran away to join the army.

There was an accident,

and this guy was k*lled and I was injured.

But they made a mistake.

And all I had to do was be him
and I could leave Korea.

Be who?

- Donald Draper.
- You took his name?

Yes.

Isn't that against the law?

Yes.

I found out it was easier to be him

than to start over.

And it turned out he was married
to that woman, so I took care of her.

And then I divorced her
the minute I met you.

You divorced her on Valentine's Day, 1953,

three months before we got married.
Why didn't you tell me?

- Why couldn't you tell me any of this?
- When? The day we met?

On our first date? On our wedding night?

- Why did you need to know?
- You don't get to ask any questions.

You have a family.

No, I don't.

All this time I thought you were
some football hero who hated his father.

I knew you were poor.
I knew you were ashamed of it.

And I see how you are with money.
You don't understand it.

I was very poor.

Did you see her
when you were in California?

I did.

And she reminded me that I loved you.

What would you do if you were me?

- Would you love you?
- I was surprised that you ever loved me.

Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?

- I don't know.
- You obviously wanted me to know this

or you wouldn't have left your keys, you
wouldn't have kept all of this in my house.

Say something.

I didn't think I had a choice.

And I don't know what the difference is.

This is our house.

- Those are our children.
- Well, there's a big difference.

You lied to me every day.

I can't trust you. I don't know who you are.

Yes, you do.

We're not done.

Betts, I'm in here.

- How is he?
- He kicked his blankets off.

Sit with me.

This was my father, Archibald.

But this...

That's not my mother.

My mother was a 22-year-old prost*tute
who d*ed having me.

This woman,

Abigail, Archie's wife.

She raised me.

When I was 10,

Arch d*ed and we moved.

And Abigail

took up with him.

Mack.

Uncle Mack.

He was nice to me.

What happened to them?

They're all dead.

Even Adam?

The little boy in all the pictures.
I assume he's your brother.

He was my half-brother.

And he d*ed.

He k*lled himself.

He came to me because he wanted help,

and I turned him away.

He didn't even want help, he just...

He just wanted to be a part of my life.

And I couldn't risk all of this.

He hung himself.

I'm sorry. I am.

Bob, how are you?
Listen, I've got a favor to ask you.

I know this girl. Actually, you met her once.

Joan Holloway. Well, Harris. Redhead?

Yes, she's beautiful.

Anyway, she's expensive,
but you're always complaining

about needing someone
to whip your place into shape,

so think about it.

I want to help her out.
She's important to me.

Jane's fine. Thanks for asking.

Don't be a stranger.

I'm sorry, Joanie.

And I'm gonna buy you another vase
to put those in.

- I'm gonna buy you a lot of things.
- It's not about buying things.

I know, I know, but I've been an ass,

feeling sorry for myself
because I couldn't solve this problem.

And it was so easy, Joanie.
The answer was right in front of me.

I joined the army, Joanie.

You're gonna be taken care of.
We're gonna be taken care of.

And the best part is, I get to be a surgeon.
They need them.

- You joined the army?
- I know I should've asked you,

but I'll do six weeks of basic training.
That's it.

I'll do my residency in New York.

- And then what?
- And then I might have to go somewhere.

West Germany, maybe Vietnam,
if that's still going on,

but a lot of docs don't have to go anywhere,
especially if they have families.

And I'll go in as a captain.
You know what that means?

You don't have to work anymore.

- I don't know what to say.
- Joanie, please tell me

this will make you happy,
because it will make me happy

to give you everything you want.

It's wonderful, Greg.

And no more soup.
Get your coat. We're going out.

- We should.
- That's my girl.

Do you want something?

Are you gonna have something?

- Daddy, are you going to trick or treat?
- Yes, of course.

I'll see you tonight.

- I didn't think you were coming in today.
- I canceled my plans.

Do you want me to reschedule your lunch
with Jeff Stansbury at United Fruit?

No, I have plenty to do.

- Hello?
- I stopped by earlier.

- No one answered.
- I was running all morning.

- About last night...
- What happened? Did you get caught?

It's more complicated than that.

So, I suppose I'm not going
to see you anymore?

Not right now. No.

Are you okay?

Only you would ask about me right now.

Do I have to worry about my job?

No.

Okay.

I should go.

Goodbye.

Goodbye, Suzanne.

- He's home! Let's go!
- You'll wake the baby.

- Do I look like a gypsy?
- Yes.

Let's go, let's go!

- Do you want anything?
- No.

Should I take the carriage or just carry him?

It's cold out there.

You can stay here with him or I can.

No.

Good.

What's taking so long?

- Trick or treat!
- Trick or treat!

Well, hello there. Look at this.

We've got a gypsy and a hobo.

And who are you supposed to be?