♪ Come and listen to my
story 'bout a man named Jed
♪ A poor mountaineer
barely kept his family fed
♪ And then one day he
was sh**ting at some food
♪ And up through the
ground come a-bubbling crude
♪ Oil, that is ♪
Black gold Texas tea
♪ Well, the first thing you
know old Jed's a millionaire
♪ The kinfolk said "Jed,
move away from there"
♪ Said "California's
the place you oughta be"
♪ So they loaded up the
truck and they moved to Beverly
♪ Hills, that is
♪ Swimming pools Movie stars ♪
The Beverly Hillbillies.
By doggies, ain't nothing grins
back at you like a baked possum.
Unless it's two of 'em.
There is a brace of 'em.
And each one of 'em with
a persimmon in his mouth.
Granny, you're
really putting it on.
Well, it ain't every day that
Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs
puts their feet
under your table.
They been eating in
them big city hotels.
I bet you there ain't
a hotel in the country
serves possum with a
persimmon in his mouth.
Just one.
- The Ritz.
- Are you sure?
That's where I got the idea.
The Ritz Hotel in Bug Tussle.
Morning, Paw. Morning, Granny.
- Morning, daughter.
- Morning, Elly.
What happened to her skirt?
Either it shrank or she's
commencing to grow again.
Elly May, you wearing boots?
Oh, yes, sir, Paw.
You fixing to go wading?
No, sir, Paw.
Well, your skirt is
short enough for it.
That's a fact. You're showing
more meat than a butcher's window.
Oh.
This here's what
you call a mini skirt.
- Minnie who?
- Sure can't be Minnie Pearl.
Hiya, doll. How's
it going, baby?
What did he call me?
Sounded like "baby."
- Jethro.
- Be right with you, sweetie.
He's talking crazier
than he looks.
And that's purty crazy.
- Hi, cuz.
- Hi, cuz.
All right, now, what's
on your mind, baby?
You, you and your cuz here
both appear to be a couple
of kernels shy of a cob.
Yeah. Where'd you
get them clothes?
Well, Jethro said this here's
the new Hollywood look.
Yeah, you two can
wear them square threads
and act like a couple
of rubes if you want to,
but Hollywood's done
rubbed off on Elly and me.
Get with it, baby.
You do that one more time
and I'm gonna change your
Hollywood look to a hickory-wood look.
Now you're talking.
Now, go and put some decent clothes
on before Lester and Earl gets here.
But, Paw, that's why we
got on these here fancy duds.
- Threads.
- Yeah.
'Cause Lester Flatt and
Earl Scruggs is a-coming out.
- Winging west.
- Yeah, to make a movie.
- To lens a flick.
- Yeah.
Jethro says I can act in
it and he's gonna direct it.
I am gonna meg it and we is gonna
preem it at the Grauman's Chinaman.
Yeah.
That's where they preem
all the big flicks, baby.
Don't call me that.
All right, sweetie.
I'm gonna cut a hickory switch.
I'm going with you. I
can use the fresh air.
You reckon them two brush
apes ever gonna get any class?
- I don't know, Jethro.
- Don't call me Jethro.
When you talk Hollywood,
you got to add things
like chickie or
baby or sweetie or...
That must be Mr. Flatt
and Mr. Scruggs.
Not Mr. Flatt and Mr. Scruggs.
Oh, never mind. Just
stand back and listen to me.
Earl, I don't know about you,
but I just can't wait to sit down to
some of Granny's back-home cooking.
Hope she ain't forgot how after
all these years in the big city.
Oh, you don't have
to worry about that.
The Clampetts is one
family that just don't change.
Howdy, baby. Hiya, sweetie.
- Was that Jethro?
- I think so.
But who's baby and sweetie?
Lester, baby. Earl, sweetie.
It's us.
Elly May, are you
expecting rain?
No. Why?
You sure are
dressed for high water.
Oh, this here's what
you call a mini skirt.
- Minnie who?
- Sure can't be Minnie Pearl.
I stashed your leather
in the spare room.
Well, how about it, dolls?
You gonna ink us to a deal?
- Do what?
- Sign us to your movie.
Me acting and Jethro directing.
- What movie?
- The one I read about in the trades.
That's what us movie
people call them little papers,
like the Hollywood Supporter.
What did it say in the
Hollywood Supporter?
It said "Flatt and Scruggs
winging west for film sesh."
Oh, they must have meant the
commercials we're out here to film.
Commercials?
Yeah, we're gonna do some television
spots for Foggy Mountain Soap.
What do you think,
Jethro... baby?
We better huddle
with our ten percenter.
What does that mean?
I don't know, but all the big
stars and directors does it.
We'll get back to you, sweeties.
Don't call us. We'll call you.
If Jed and Granny's changed like them,
we can forget the back-home cooking.
Lester and Earl!
- Well, howdy, Granny.
- Howdy, fellas. How are you?
- Hello, Jed. Good to see you.
- Jed, how are you?
Why, just as fine as
snuff and half as dusty.
- How long you been here?
- Just a minute.
Been talking to Elly and Jethro.
Say, is Jethro really
a movie director now?
You betcha.
Well, Granny and me wouldn't
think of stepping in front of a camera
without that boy
doing the directing.
Come on out to the kitchen.
Granny's got a treat for you.
Not now, Jed. Just a minute.
This treating business
is a two-way street.
We know what you're hinting
at, Granny, and it's our pleasure.
That's a fact. This is one place we
don't mind singing for our victuals.
I just hope our music is as
good as Granny's cooking.
It won't be, but I don't
expect the impossible.
Here's a good one for Granny,
Mama, You've Been On My Mind.
♪ Even though my mind is hazy
and my thoughts they might be narrow
♪ Where you been don't bother me
♪ Or bring me down in sorrow
♪ It don't even matter who
you're waking with tomorrow
♪ Mama, you're just on my mind
♪ Mama, you're just on my mind
♪ When you wake up in the
morning, baby, look inside your mirror
♪ I won't be next to you
♪ You know I won't be near
♪ I'd just be curious to know
if your reflection is as clear
♪ As the one that
I've got on my mind
♪ As someone who
has had you on his mind
♪ Just breathing to myself
Pretending not that I don't know
♪ Mama, you've been on my mind
♪ Uh-huh ♪ Mama,
you've been on my mind ♪
I hate to do this to you, Earl,
but the Commodore is
here to take us to the studio.
- Who?
- Mr. Ratterman.
He's the head of the
advertising agency.
He owns a boat and likes
to be called the Commodore.
Fetch him in. I'll dish
him up some possum.
Oh, he's already had his lunch, Granny,
but I would like you folks to meet him.
- Come on in, Commodore.
- Well, well, well. Ahoy.
You've heard Earl and me speak
about our friends, the Clampetts.
Well, here they are. Granny, Jed,
Commodore Stewart Ratterman.
- Howdy, Commodore.
- How do you do?
- Mighty pleased to meet you.
- The pleasure is mine, sir.
Oh, boys, boys, these are the
two people I've been looking for.
Why? What did we do?
Oh, no, no, I don't mean that.
What I mean is you are the
perfect types for my commercials.
Well, how about it? Would
you like to be on television?
Oh, we ain't actors, Mr. Commodore.
We couldn't be nothing but ourselves.
- Jed...
- That is exactly why I want you.
That honesty and believability
will come across on the camera.
It'll sell the product.
- We couldn't sell nothing.
- Jed...
We's just a couple of
plain old ridge runners.
Jed...
Folks wouldn't care
shucks about seeing us.
Jed!
- I wanna be on the television.
- Why?
'Cause them soup commercials
I made was never showed
after I told the folks
back home to watch 'em.
Well, this'll be
shown, I guarantee it.
Please, Jed. I want the folks back
home to see us on the television.
- How about just using Granny?
- Oh, no. I'd like to have both of you.
Please, Jed.
- Well, all right.
- Yeah!
Come on, we'll go get
dressed up in our Sunday best.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I want you
in your old, everyday work clothes.
Well, if that's what he wants,
let's go get on some old clothes.
Commodore, we think maybe
you just took on a boat full of trouble.
Oh, now, what are you
talking about? They are great.
They'll sell soap by
the carload, believe me.
I know my commercials.
- But you don't know the Clampetts.
- What do you mean?
You're gonna find them
just a little bit hard to handle.
Yeah. They ain't gonna say
something just because you tell 'em to.
If they say it, they
gotta believe it.
Marvelous. We'll have
honesty. We'll have integrity.
But you'll also have Jethro.
- Who's he?
- Mr. Clampett's nephew.
He's a director.
And they won't step in
front of a camera without him.
Well, that's perfect. You say
they're hard to handle. He can do it.
Listen to that.
The minute I walked through the
door, they commenced clapping.
Boy, they know a big
director when they see one.
They ain't clapping for you.
That's for Flatt and Scruggs.
Listen, Elly, if you're
gonna be my yes girl,
you got to say yes
to everything I say.
All right.
- Yes, J.B.
- Yes, J.B.
- Where you been?
- Visiting all the stages.
Man, I got that
director's lingo down pat.
Listen to this.
Clear the set! Hit the arcs!
Action! Roll 'em! Take five!
- Who's that idiot?
- I think that's your director.
- Yeah, that's him.
- You've got to be kidding.
- Hey, Jethro.
- Howdy, sweeties.
Be with you in a minute. Sorry,
sailor, no visitors on the set.
Cut! Print!
- Did I tell him no visitors?
- Yes, J.B.
Jethro, this gentleman
is the head of the agency
that's making these commercials,
Commodore Stewart Ratterman.
Oh, yeah. Glad to
meet you, Stew, baby.
Don't call me Stew, baby.
My name is Ratterman.
All right, Rat, sweetie.
How about calling me Commodore?
You're on, Commie.
Hit the grips! Strike the
booms! Let's see some dollies!
- Who are you, his nurse?
- No, sir. I'm Jethro's yes girl.
No matter what he
says, I got to say yes to it.
Maybe the kid isn't
as dumb as he acts.
Oh, no, Commodore.
She's Jethro's cousin.
- Mr. Clampett's daughter.
- Oh.
All right, who's the litterbug?
Somebody left this
junk all over the set.
Was it you, Commie?
- Could we go back to Stew, baby?
- All right, Stew, baby.
But you gotta get rid of this
stuff, especially that big 'un there.
When I go to sh**ting Flatt and
Scruggs, it's gonna show up in the picture.
That is the whole idea.
This is the sponsor's product.
It's what we're selling
in these commercials.
Huh?
I'll tell you what, let's start
off by filming Lester and Earl
doing the Foggy
Mountain Soap theme.
Then you can sort
of get your bearings.
Oh, you're a
sweetheart, sweetheart.
All right, that's a
wrap! Pull the plug!
All right, who's the clown
that turned out the lights?
Hit the lights, boys. All right, come
on, let's get set up for a take here.
Wardrobe. Makeup. On
the double, everybody.
- Places. Let's go.
- Just a minute, just a minute!
I do the hollering around
here. Who are you?
- I'm your assistant.
- Oh.
All right, you
can holler a little.
Commodore, you'll be doing the
off-camera announcement as usual?
Oh, yes, yes, I wouldn't trust
anyone else with those beautiful words.
Fine. All right, quiet on
the set, boys. This is a take.
- Me, me, me, me.
- All right, roll 'em.
Foggy Mountain Soap commercial,
Flatt and Scruggs. Take one.
Action.
Foggy Mountain Soap,
now with new patented Super Sat
to super saturate your wash
with super saturated suds,
presents Lester Flatt
and Earl Scruggs.
♪ Oh, the best durn soap
is Foggy Mountain Soap
♪ It gets your
clothes much whiter...
- Hold it, hold it, hold it! Cut!
- What is the matter?
The light bulb's b*rned out.
That is a microphone!
Hey, watch that. I do
the hollering around here.
Me and Harry!
All right, fellas, you've recorded
my announcement. Let's just...
Why don't we just... just go...
just go ahead and do the music?
We're rolling, Lester and
Earl. Pick it up with the vocal.
♪ Oh, the best durn soap
is Foggy Mountain Soap
♪ It gets your
clothes much whiter
♪ You can bet your hat
it'll make dirt scat and make...
Hold it, hold it. Hold
it, hold it, hold it.
Before I can direct this scene,
there's something I gotta know.
What's the motervation?
- What's the what?
- The motervation.
I was over on the Marlon Brando
set and they's wallering in it. Elly!
Yes, J.B.?
Light me up. Gotta figure out
how to motervate this scene.
- Yes, J.B.
- Excuse me.
Are you gonna restage this?
- Am I gonna restage this?
- Yes, J.B.
Are you out of your mind?
- Am I out of my mind?
- Yes, J.B.
What's the matter, J.B.?
Elly, I think I done
overmotervated.
Gotta go, Stew, baby. You
can pick up my Oscar for me.
Oh, good. Harry
found the Clampetts.
Now we can set sail.
After that cruise with Jethro, you sure
you wanna head for deep water again?
Relax. The old skipper
is at the helm again.
- Welcome aboard.
- Sorry about the delay, Commodore.
Mr. Clampett had a
little trouble in makeup.
Yeah, a fella tried to put
lipstick and rouge on Jed.
He was real set on it. I had
to be a mite short with him.
Oh, I see.
Sorry, but like I said, we
can't be nothing but ourselves.
That is exactly the quality I want in
these commercials, complete honesty.
Well, good, good.
Well, now, if you will just...
just sit down right here.
There we are.
Now, Mr. Hogan and I
will demonstrate to you
exactly what it is
we want you to do.
Oh, now, of course, I want you
to put this in your own words.
But this will just give you
the sort of... the general idea.
Now, here, Mr. Hogan,
come right over here, now.
Now, Mr. Hogan will be
Jed and I'll be Granny.
All right, now, the camera's
rolling. Camera's rolling.
Now... here we go.
- Howdy, folks.
- Howdy.
This fella here does a lot o'
huntin' and fishin' and chores,
and he gets his
clothes mighty dirty.
But that don't worry me none
because right here in my kitchen,
I wash his clothes with
the best soap made.
Now, at this point, we're
going to come in close.
Close-up of the soap.
So we'll just take it up
to there to start, OK?
- Fine and dandy.
- Good, good.
Now, if you'd
just... Right up here.
- Shall we have a rehearsal, Commodore?
- Oh, no, no, no.
I want this to be
completely spontaneous.
We'll just roll film
on the first take.
Right.
You're at it again and
I done told you once.
- You want a shiny nose?
- You want a shiny eye?
- Roll the tape.
- Roll 'em.
Foggy Mountain Soap commercial,
Jed and Granny. Take one.
They get your nose
one way or another.
When I say "action,"
you start talking.
All righty. Action!
- Are we on the television now?
- That's right, the film is rolling.
Will the folks back
home be able to see us?
- You bet they will.
- Hello, Pearl.
Howdy, Pearl. Howdy, Jethrine.
Hello, Luke Short and everybody
down at the general store.
Say, Luke, next time
you butcher a hog,
be sure and send us
some fresh crackling.
Yeah, the last ones
turned rancid on us.
- Howdy, everybody...
- Keep rolling.
- And Dora Gavett.
- And Fanny Bearwhistle.
Excuse me, Granny. Could you
just talk about the washing now?
- Oh, all right.
- Thank you.
Say, you know this fella does a heap
of hunting and fishing and chores and all,
and he gets his
clothes powerful dirty.
But that don't fret me one bit
'cause here in
my kitchen I use...
Wait a minute.
This ain't my kitchen.
Cut!
Granny, couldn't we... couldn't
we just pretend this is your kitchen?
Well, that would be telling
a fib, wouldn't it, fellas?
- That's right, Granny.
- And the Commodore wouldn't like that.
Oh, he's a regular hog
about honesty and integrity.
Thanks, fellas.
Granny, I tell you what, I am
going to give you this kitchen.
- I don't want it.
- Why not?
'Cause it's three miles
from my cupboards.
It's only got two
walls and no ceiling.
And, besides, even Jed
couldn't afford the light bill.
Keep one fella busy
just changing bulbs.
Uh... I tell...
Suppose... we just don't
mention the kitchen at all.
You just say that... that you keep his
clothes clean with the best soap made.
That's honest. I'll do it.
Good, good. OK.
All right, boys, from the top.
All right, let's have
it quiet for a take.
And roll 'em.
Foggy Mountain Soap commercial,
Jed and Granny. Take two.
Action!
Are we starting all over again?
- Yeah, that's right.
- Hello, Pearl.
Howdy, Pearl. Howdy, Jethrine.
Hello, Luke Short and everybody
down at the general store.
Says, Luke, next
time you butcher a hog,
be sure and send us
some fresh crackling.
Yeah, the last ones
turned rancid on us.
- Howdy, everybody up on Possum Ridge.
- And hi to Elverna Bradshaw.
And Emma Lu.
All right, hold it, hold it, hold
it. All right, hold it just a minute.
Did we miss somebody?
I... I... I meant start over again at
the beginning of the commercial
where you talk
about the washing.
Oh. All right.
Thank you.
This fella does a heap of hunting
and fishing and chores and all,
and he gets his
clothes powerful dirty.
But that don't fret me one bit
'cause I get 'em cleaner than a
hound's tooth, and you know why?
I wash 'em with the best doggone
soap that's made in this world!
- Let her roll. She is dynamite.
- There ain't no soap better.
What soap am I
talking about, friends?
I'll tell you!
I'm talking about
the one, the only one,
Granny's homemade lye soap.
And I can tell every one
of you how to make it.
Don't waste your money
on store-bought'n soap
when I can tell you how
to make it better at home!
Now, friends, it ain't me you
got to thank for this good advice.
It's a nice fella by the name
of Commodore Ratterman.
It was him asked
me to get up here
and tell everybody
how I wash Jed's clothes
with the best soap made.
Hey, sweeties, I'm
as good as new now.
Guess I had just a little
bit too much motervation.
What's the matter with him?
Just a little too much
honesty and integrity.
♪ Oh, the best durn
soap is Granny's lye soap
♪ It gets your
clothes much whiter
♪ You can bet your
hat it'll make dirt scat
♪ And make your
whole day brighter ♪
♪ Well, now it's time to say
goodbye to Jed and all his kin
♪ They would like to thank
you folks for kindly dropping in
♪ You're all invited back
next week to this locality
♪ To have a heaping
helping of their hospitality
♪ Hillbilly, that is
♪ Set a spell Take
your shoes off ♪
Y'all come back now, you hear?
This has been a
Filmways presentation.