02x14 - Lucy Has Labor Pains

[bunniefuu]

Hi, Fred.

Listen, did you call Jim and Morey?

Well, as soon as they get there,
bring them up, huh?

Yeah, I'll have the television
getting warm

and the beer getting cold.

Yeah, we'll watch the game from up
here.

What do you mean we'll upset Lucy?

Of course not.

Listen, Fred, there is nothing wrong
with Lucy.

She's just having a baby.

Why does everybody treat her

like she's falling apart or
something?

Okay, I'll see you

in a few minutes. Bye.

Honey!

Why did you take that chair away?

Oh, I'm sorry, honey.

I didn't know that was your chair.

What's the big idea?
I want to watch the ball game.

Oh, honey, you can't watch television
up here today.

What do you mean I can't?

Fred is coming up with a couple of
the guys.

Well, I'm sorry.
The girls are coming over.

They're giving me a baby shower.

Oh, now, honey.

Now, dear, think of the baby.

Think of all the nice things she'll
get.

Well, think of me.

I finally get an afternoon off,

and I can't even sit in my own home

and watch my own television set.

Now, I am thinking of you.

If it wasn't for the baby shower,

you'd have to pay for all that loot
I'm going to get.

Well, it might be worth it.

Ricky Ricardo, you're jealous of the
baby.

Oh, now, honey, don't be silly.

Well, then you go to Fred's and look
at the game.

Isn't it nice the girls are giving me
a surprise shower?

Well, if it's a surprise, how do you
know about it?

Well, how do you think?

Every girl in the club called up and
told me.

Every girl in the club called up and
told you

it was going to be a surprise?

Yeah, yeah.

They knew I'd hate it if they came
over here to surprise me

and the house was a mess, and I had
my hair up in curlers.

I want them to surprise me

but I don't want them to surprise me.

Yeah, uh-huh.

What are you doing?

Oh...

Trying to pick up this dead petunia
and I got stuck.

Help me, will you?

Oh, honey, come on.

Up you go.

My center of gravity has shifted a
little.

Well, honey, after six months, you
should've learned

there are a few things that you can't
do.

Yeah, that's right.

Here, I'll take them out for you,
honey.

Oh, thank you.

You sit down and rest; go on.

No, honey, I'm all right.

Come on, I want you to sit down and
rest; sit down.

Uh, well, all right, but in that
chair, dear.

Well, honey, that's the most
comfortable chair

in the whole house.

Yeah, I know it's comfortable,

but once I get into it, I can't get
out of it.

Well, honey, I'm here to help you.

Sit down, be comfortable.

Well...

Go ahead. Come on.

All right.

There you are.

Oh, honey, would you take out

that wastepaper basket too?

Sure.

Whew...

There's a few bottles under the sink

that ought to go out, too, dear.

Hello?

No, no, thank you.

We already subscribe to all the
magazines we can use.

Thank you.

Hey, what are you doing up?

I thought you couldn't get up out of
that chair.

Oh, well, I was wrong, dear.

It was a cinch.

You better run along now.

The girls will be here any minute.

Okay.

Say, uh, what am I supposed to do for
lunch?

Oh, honey,

I just haven't got time to fix lunch
for you.

Gee, I forgot all about you.

Yeah, that's been happening a lot
lately.

Aw, gosh, honey, I'm s...

Oh, that's all right, that's all
right.

I guess I can get Fred to rustle up
something.

Well, that would be a lot...

That must be the girls.
Honey, go out the back way.

Go on, go out that way.

Uh... come on in, the door is open.

Surprise! Surprise!

Surprise!
Surprise!

Oh!

Oh, my gosh!

Oh, I never thought...

A surprise for me?

Oh, that's wonderful!

Did you ever see

anything like that in your life?

Oh, I love 'em!
Aren't they adorable?

They're so little!

Look at this that goes with it.

Isn't that cute!

Did you notice these little shirts,
Lucy?

Weren't the girls generous, Ethel?

Oh, I'll say they were.

Oh, hi, Ricky.

Look at all the wonderful things the
baby and I got.

Oh, gee, that's swell.

Aren't they adorable?

Oh, yeah...

Listen, honey, is dinner ready?

Oh, honey, I've been so busy.

I forgot.

Well, honey, you know what time I
have to get to work.

Oh, yeah, well, I'll fix something
right away.

Look at this.
Isn't that cute?

That's cute.

Look at this, honey.
Can't you just...?

Ooh, isn't that darling?

I'll be right back.

Hey, Rick, did you see today's paper?

No.

You made Winchell's column.

I did?
Yeah!

Ricky, Winchell!
How wonderful!

No kidding!

Yeah, there's a whole item here about
you.

Oh, imagine me in Winchell's column.

Yeah.
There it is.

"Carrot-topped Lucy Ricardo, formerly
Lucy McGillicuddy

"and currently one of show business's
most beautiful wives

is 'infanticipating.'"

Oh! Isn't that wonderful?

How about that?

It's a nice article about me, yeah.

You're in there.

You haven't finished it.
Here, read that.

Oh. Oh.

Her husband is the bandleader.

Oh, that's wonderful, dear.

Let me see.
Look, Ethel.

Uh... "Lucy Ricardo...

"beautiful..."

"infanticipating."

Aw! We'll have to cut that out and
save it.

It's the first time

the baby's been mentioned in print.

Hey, you ought to start a scrapbook.

How 'bout dinner, eh?

That's a wonderful idea!
A baby scrapbook.

How 'bout dinner?

I would love that.

I love keeping scrapbooks.

It'll have to be a great big one

"Would you like dinner, Ricky?

...if it's already made Winchell's
column.

"Yeah, I'd love some dinner."

"What would you like?"

"I would like a nice, big, thick
steak; juicy."

"Would you like some potatoes with
it?"

"Yes, please, and put plenty of
butter in the potato."

"How about some onions, Ricky?"

"Oh! I would like to have some
onions."

All right, all right, all right, I'll
fix you something to eat.

Would a nice piece of rare roast beef
make you feel better?

And how.

Okay, coming right up.

Okay.

Aw, gee, it was a wonderful shower.

Too bad you fellows couldn't be here.

Well, Ethel, I'd have come,

but I didn't have a thing to wear.

Oh, you, come on downstairs and I'll
fix your supper.

Bye, Ricky.

Good-bye.

Would this be rare enough?

Oh, Lucy.

Well, I bought it.

I just forgot to cook it, that's all.

Don't you have anything else?

Uh, yeah, how would you like a nice,
thick,

juicy, delicious...
fried egg sandwich.

No?

Well, the surprise shower threw me
off schedule.

I had a lot of things to do today,
Ricky.

You should see the list of things I
had.

Here, look, look at this.

"Buy roast beef."

Well, congratulations.

Thank you.

"Pick up Ricky's laundry."

Ew...

Now, you're not going to tell me

that I don't have any clean shirts.

I'm not?

Well, couldn't you stop by the
laundry

on your way to the club?

"Pick up Ricky's tux at cleaners."

Well, it's only a couple more blocks

to the cleaners.

I better get going.

I got a lot of things to do.

Uh, you don't mind if I borrow your
list, do you?

No.

Thanks.

Well, honey, you have to eat.

Let me fix you something.

Oh, don't worry about me.
I'll get by.

I'll-I'll-I'll eat.

I'll get something, somehow,
somewhere.

It's the doctor, dear.

Good morning, Ricky.

Hiya, Doc.

Now, what seems to be the trouble?

You just tell me all about it.

Uh, well, he was very nauseated this
morning.

Oh?
And, uh...

Nauseated?
Yes, and he has dizzy spells

and he has pains in his stomach.

Pains in his stomach.

Uh-huh.
Hmm.

Every few minutes.

It must be something I ate last
night.

I see.

Yeah, well, I suppose it's my fault.

I should've gotten you dinner, dear,

instead of having that silly shower.

Hmm...
Yeah.

Hmm, no temperature.

Mrs. Ricardo, do you mind

if I talk to your husband alone for a
moment?

Oh, not at all.

Is it, is it serious, Doctor?

Is it fatal?

Come on, tell me.

I can take it.
Go ahead.

Tell me, Ricky, have you been feeling
neglected lately,

since your wife is going to have a
baby?

Neglected?!

No. Why?

Well...

Think of all your symptoms.

You say you have morning sickness,
right?

Yeah.

Pains in the stomach?

Yeah.
Dizziness?

Yeah.

Don't you see, Ricky?

They're exactly like the symptoms

your wife has been having lately.

Oh, now, come on, what are you going
to tell me,

that I'm going to have a baby?

No, I can definitely assure you

you are not going to have a baby.

No kidding.

Now, for this I got to pay you for a
house call?

Now, come on, stop joking, will you?

I'm not neglected, I'm sick.

I'm surprised you don't feel
neglected.

Why, your wife even said

she couldn't fix dinner for you last
night

because of the baby shower.

So? That didn't bother me.

Listen, if I wanted to get upset,

I got a hundred things to get upset
about.

She didn't pick up my laundry.

My suits weren't cleaned.

I come home on an afternoon off,

I can't even sit and watch the ball
game.

Now, what are you trying to say,

that I'm sick because I'm feeling
sorry for myself?

Well, not...

Aw, come on, will you?

That's the craziest thing

I ever heard of in my whole life.

I'm sick because I ate something.

It didn't land in the right place.

It gave me a pain.
It made me dizzy.

That's what made me sick.

That's the craziest double-talk I
ever heard in my life.

Well, on second thought,

maybe I better have another look at
you.

Oh...

Ah...

Yes, you definitely have ptomaine.

Well, that's more like it.

Hi, Lucy.

Oh, hi.

Did you find out

what's the matter with Ricky yet?

No, the doctor's still in there.

Oh, Doctor, what's the matter with
him?

Oh, it's nothing serious.

You know, Mrs. Ricardo,

sometimes, when a wife is expecting,

the, uh, husband develops the same
symptoms.

Really?
Well, that seems strange.

Oh, no, no.

It's not unusual.

At a time like this, when everybody's
interest

centers around the expected child,

the husband feels left out,
neglected.

Oh, I don't think Ricky feels
neglected.

Still, there was that baby shower
yesterday.

Yeah, and you forgot to fix dinner
for him.

Yeah, and I forgot to pick up his
cleaning and his laundry

and he did act kind of funny about
that, didn't he?

Exactly as I thought.
You know,

if there was some way that you could
figure out

to make your husband the center of
attention,

I'm sure your troubles would be over.

Oh.
Well, I'll call you later on

to see how you're getting on.

Well, thank you, Dr. Rabwin.

Not at all.

Good day, ladies.
Bye.

Oh, my bag.

Now, how am I going to make Ricky

the center of attention?

I don't know.

Why don't you give him a baby shower.

Don't try to be funny.
Try to help me.

Hey, you know, that's not such a bad
idea, at that:

A daddy shower.

Yeah! We can have the men come

and give Ricky presents for the baby.

Who could give it for him?

Fred, who else?

Do you think he would?

He'd love it.

Come on, let's go tell him.

Okay.

What happened?

What'd he say?
Did he like the idea?

He's crazy about it.

You should have seen him perk up when
I told him.

He's practically well already.

Oh, that's wonderful.

Here's the list of fellas he wants me
to invite.

Oh, Fred, I love you.

Mm! Thank you!

Wow!

I love you too, Fred.

Well...

I hate to leave this little love nest

but I'll see you later.

Okay. Where are you going?

Down to the recreation club.

I've got to make arrangements for our
stag party.

Oh.
G'bye.

So long.
Bye.
Okay. Bye-bye.

Oh, gee, won't they have fun?

Yeah.

Stag party?

What happened to the baby shower?

Oh, I guess Fred would feel kind of
funny

asking men to a baby shower,

so he's going to call it a stag
party.

Oh.

Stag party, huh?

Well, it's still a baby shower.

It is?

Oh, now, Lucy, don't be silly.

You want Ricky to get well, don't
you?

Sure I want him to get well.

But I'd like to know what kind of
medicine he's using.

When they call a party "stag,"

it means only men are allowed.

It does?

Yeah.

Doesn't it?

Well, there's one good way to find
out.

How?

What if a couple of uninvited stags
showed up?

Uninvited sta...?

You mean...?

Yeah.

Oh, Lucy!

We could disguise ourselves.

What are you going to go as, an
expectant father?

Even if we could disguise ourselves,

they know everybody who's going to be
there.

Well, now, just leave it to me.

I'll think of something.

Sure. Yes, sir.

Well, we'll be happy to have you.

Yeah, well, come right over.

Okay, thank you. Bye.

Hey, Fred?

Yeah?

This is getting to be quite an
affair.

Why?

Well, you know who that was on the
phone?

No.
It's a reporter.

Yeah. He wants to bring a
photographer over

and they want to cover the first
daddy shower.

Well, that sounds interesting.

What paper was it?

He didn't say.

Wouldn't it be wonderful

if we made the society page?

Oh, boy.

I can see it now.

"Fred Mertz poured last night

"for Ricky Ricardo

and some of his most intimate slobs."

Well, here's the g*ng.

Hi! Congratulations.

Break it up, now, boys.
Break it up.

Now, remember, this is a shower,

and let's do it right.

Now, first, everybody put their
presents

on that table.

All right...

right over here.

Oh, fellas!
Oh, gee whiz.

Oh, isn't that...?

Look-- "From Jerry."

Oh, yeah.

Oh, Jerry, you didn't have to do it.

Oh, well, it was nothing, Rick.

Just what I always wanted.

Oh, just a little something I thought
you could use.

Oh, that's nice.

Well, let's start opening the
presents, huh?

Yes?

Is this the Ricardo party?

Yes, I'm Ricky Ricardo.

How do you do?

I'm from the paper.
Press.

Uh, press.
Yeah, press.

I see, yeah, well, what paper are you
from?

The New York Times.
The Herald Tribune.

The Herald Tribune.
The New York Times.

Well, actually, it isn't generally
known,

but, uh, it's the New York Herald
Times Tribune.

Isn't that right, Sam?

Yeah, that's right, Pete.

Uh, uh...

uh, listen, uh, you-you make yourself
at home.

Will you, uh, will you pardon me for
a minute?

Sure, go ahead, take your shower.

I mean, have your shower.

What are you saving kings for, fella?

Listen, I want you to meet a couple
of great guys here.

Jerry, this is Pete.

How are you, Pete?

Sam, this is Fred.
Fred Mertz.

Pete, how are you?

Fred Mertz?
Glad to know you, Fred Mertz.

Uh, this, uh,

the boys are from the newspapers.

They're coming over to write about
our daddy shower.

Isn't that nice?

Oh, is that right?
Yeah.

Well, uh, what do you like to know?

Well, now, whose idea was this here
shower?

Uh, that was mine.

Oh, is that so, Mr. Mertz?

Yes. I said to my old battle a*, I
said...

"Why should the mother...

"why should the mothers get all the
breaks?

Why don't we do something about the
fathers?"

Oh, you said that, huh?

That's what I said, yeah.

You're looking for a story, are you?

I sure am.

Well, I've got a great story for you,
Pete.

Oh, well, go ahead.

Yeah! Of course, you'd never be able

to print this in a newspaper, you
know.

Tell it, Jerry. Go on!

All right. All right.

Well, you see, there was this fella--

he was a bachelor, a sort of a man
about town,

and he goes into this nightclub in
Paris.

Ah...!

You say this whole thing was your
idea, huh, Mr. Mertz?

Just a minute, Pete.

Just a minute, will you?

Just let the young man tell his...

Yeah, let him tell the story, will
you?

Come back here, please?
Let the fella tell it.

Now, one night, he goes into this
nightclub, see?

Uh-huh, yeah.

And this beautiful girl, a cancan
dancer,

Yeah, yeah?

she's doing her act.
Uh-huh.

She's dancing, see?

And this fella walks right up on the
stage.

Uh-huh!
She what I mean?

She's dancing, and he's right there

in the middle of the stage.

Now, do you get the picture?

Uh, picture.
Yeah, yeah.

Oh... Oh...!

Where'd he go?

Where'd everybody go?

Hey, hey, this way, this way, Pete.

That you, Sam?

Yeah, that's me.

Come on, right this way.

I'm sorry we have to break this up,
fellas,

but I guess we'll have to go now.

Well, so long, fellas.

Yeah, well, good-bye, Sam.

Good-bye.
Good-bye, Pete.

So long.

Bye-bye.

Good-bye, Lucy.

Good-bye, Ethel.

Ricky Ricardo!

I'm over here, honey.
Over here, over here, over here.

Oh.

How did you know?

Well, for one thing,

you're wearing my best tie

and for another thing,

you're the only man that I know

that keep his mustache on with Scotch
tape.

Fred, how did you see through my
disguise?

What disguise?

Well, we just wanted to see what went
on at a stag party.

Are you mad?

No, sweetheart, I'm not mad.

Oh, that tickles.

Ooh, it's cold outside.

Hi. Did you get everything?

Yeah, I got everything.

But if you don't stop having these
silly cravings

at : in the morning, I'm gonna
freeze to death.

Here.

Is this pistachio?

Yeah, that's pistachio.

Here's your spoon.

Which is that?

Hot fudge.

Pour it on top.

That's right.

Ooh. Now, pour that right on top of
this.

But, honey, these are sardines.

I know.

Right on top.

Oh, boy.

Honey, how can you possibly eat that?

Wonderful. Mmm!

You know, I'm surprised

that you didn't get any cravings.

Me? When?

When you were sick the other day

'cause you weren't getting enough
attention.

I was sick because I ate something

that made me sick.

Yes, dear.

Well, I was!

Yeah. All right.

You were.

Funny how you snapped out of it,
though,

after the doctor told us what we
should do.

What do you mean?

Uh... nothing, dear.

Did the doctor tell you

to give me that daddy shower

just so I get some attention?

No.

No, he just said that if we, you
know, kind of

made you feel that, well...

What's the matter?

I don't know.

I feel kind of funny.

Again?!

Hey, that looks pretty good.

Give me some, will you?

Are you crazy?
No, I'm not crazy.

Now don't be silly.

That looks good.
I got to have some.

Now, come on, give me some of that.

Ricky! Ricky, now stop!