01x01 - Because I could not stop

[bunniefuu]

[FEMALE NARRATOR] Emily
Dickinson was born in

in Amherst, Massachusetts.

She lived throughout her
life in her father's house.

Near the end of her life,
she rarely left her own room.

Aside from a few mostly anonymous
verses, she remained unpublished.

When she d*ed, her
poems were discovered.

Some of the strangest, most
fascinating poems ever written.

Almost , of them,
hidden in a maid's trunk.

[PROJECTOR SLIDES
CLACKING FASTER, FADING]

[PANTING]

Um...

[PENCIL SCRATCHING]

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

- [WOMAN] Emily!
- [KNOCKS AGAIN]

- Emily, wake up!
- [CONTINUES KNOCKING]

Ugh!

You have to go fetch water.

It is four o'clock in
the morning, Lavinia.

I'm writing.

Mother says you have
to. I did it yesterday.

Why doesn't Austin do it?

Austin is a boy.

This is such bullshit.

Because I could not stop for Death -

Stop...

["OFF THE RADAR" PLAYING]

[HORSE NEIGHS]

[CHATTER]

[SONG CONTINUES]

We needed that water an hour ago.

Where have you been?

Oh, Emily, these buckets are half empty.

You let it all spill out.

You are a useless girl. Useless.

Can't we just get a maid?

Over my dead body.

We own six horses, Mom.
I think we can get a maid.

Here, Vinnie. A flower.

For me?

When your father married me,

I said he was getting the best
housewife in all of Hampshire County.

No, in all of New England.

I'd rather scrape the skin
off my fingers than get a maid.

And I'm bringing you girls
up to be just like me.

But I don't really want...

You're gonna make a good
housewife one day, Emily Dickinson.

Now, you need to go get dressed.

We have another gentleman
coming to see you.

[SCOFFS] A gentleman?

Mom, no!

This man could very
well be your husband.

That's so romantic.

Don't pull any of those stunts
like you did the last time.

I made an offering.

You dropped a dead mouse
in that poor man's lap.

Yes.

Like a cat.

You are not a cat, Emily.

No.

Tragically, I am a woman.

Those scones are for the suitor.

Why don't I get to have any suitors?

Because I'm not trying to marry you off.

You're very good at housework.

So, I have to die an old maid
just because I can fetch water?

Life isn't fair, Lavinia.

[CLOCK TICKING]

[RAGGED BREATHING]

[GASPS, SCREAMS]

Hello.

Emily, don't do that.

Hey, Emily.

Oh, come on.

George.

Hey.

You have already made my
daughter's acquaintance?

Mom, this is George. He's
in the Lit Club with Austin.

We hang out, like, all the time.

- Well, I was just telling George here...
- [TEACUP RATTLING IN HAND]

... what an excellent
wife you're going to be.

How frugal and punctilious
you are in all of your duties.

Oh, yeah. I'm a real catch.

Sit like a lady.

[SIGHS]

George, can I talk to
you for a second outside?

- Totally.
- Great.

Mom, we'll be on the porch.
Try not to spy on us.

Oh. Yeah.

[DOOR CLOSES]

You know I'm not gonna marry you, right?

Never say never, Emily.

Like you wrote in your poem,
"I dwell in Possibility".

Nice.

I love when people quote me.

Why won't you marry me?

You don't understand. I'm
not gonna marry anyone.

That's not what your mother says.

I have one purpose on this Earth,

and that is to become a great writer.

A husband would put a stop to that.

- I wouldn't.
- Mm.

You say that now.

But little by little you would.

I'm madly in love with you.

- Too bad.
- Is there someone else?

Yes, actually.

Who is he? I'll k*ll him.

You can't k*ll him.

He is Death.

What?

I'm in love with Death.

[EMILY] He takes me out for
a carriage ride every night.

He's such a gentleman.

Sexy as hell.

You are such a weirdo.

Why am I so attracted to you?

I'd do anything for you.

Well, there is one thing you could do.

Name it.

You're still editor
of the lit mag, right?

Well, co-editor.

But yes.

I want you to publish this.

Whoa.

Okay. You're finally gonna let
me publish one of your poems?

Well, I'm not sure it's
ready, but yes, I...

This is perfect timing.

We have a little space
in our newest issue.

- Really?
- I can sneak this in.

It goes to print tomorrow.

- Tomorrow? Really?
- Tomorrow.

Everyone will know the
name Emily Dickinson.

Okay, but wait.

What is it?

You can't print my name.

Why not?

Because my father doesn't
approve of women publishing.

Oh, come on.

That's stupid.

You're a genius, Emily.
He has to approve of that.

Couldn't you just put my initials
or "Anonymous" or something?

No. No way.

You deserve credit.

And you should stand up to your father.

You know what?

Just do it. Just do it.

Publish it with my name and everything.

Thank you, George.

Any time, Miss Dickinson.

[COUGHS]

That was a disaster.

Yes, Emily.

You ruined it again.

She didn't ruin it.
They were kissing. I saw.

Kissing?

My God, what is wrong with you?

You're the one that keeps
throwing me at these men.

I'm not throwing you.

Yes, you are. It's humiliating.

You'd pawn me off on a
widower, a cr*pple.

Anyone who would take me.

The whole town of Amherst knows
how bad you wanna get rid of me.

What's all this fuss?

Mother's trying to disown me again.

I was married at , Emily.

It's high time for you to get a husband.

And move out, you mean?

Well, yes. That is what happens
when a girl gets married.

Why doesn't anyone
care if I get a husband?

Emily doesn't have to marry
anyone as far as I'm concerned.

[EMILY SIGHS]

- Thank you, Dad.
- [FATHER] Mm.

Jesus, at least somebody around here

isn't trying to kick
me out of the family.

So, you would just have her stay here

in our house till kingdom come?

- Doing nothing all day?
- I do plenty.

Oh. Like what?

I'm the one that found
all those birds' nests.

[FATHER] All right,
ladies, time to clear out

so I can enjoy my pipe and
newspaper in peace, huh?

Very well.

It's time for us to get
back to the kitchen anyway.

- [EMILY SIGHS]
- Girls, come with me.

[SCOFFS] Do I have to?

You have a bad attitude, young lady.

I just don't wanna do
chores hours a day.

And what would you do instead?

I would just... think.

- [STRIKES MATCH]
- [FATHER] Let her have a break, Mother.

It's all right.

Thanks, Daddy.

You're my hero.

You just love taking
her side, don't you?

You're gonna regret it. She's wild.

She doesn't know how to behave
like a proper young lady,

and she'll be the ruin of this family.

["PRAISE THE LORD (DA SHINE)" PLAYING]

[AUSTIN] What up, Sis?

Nothing, Bro. Just chilling.

Heard you turned down another suitor.

Yeah. Wasn't into it.

Well, on the subject of
marriage, I have some news.

What news?

I proposed to Sue.

And she said yes.

- [FARM ANIMALS CLAMORING]
- [PANTING] Yes!

Yes!

What?

You can't marry Sue!

- Why not?
- Austin, she's my best friend.

Look, Emily, don't get
all crazy right now.

It's not a good time.

Sue's sister, Mary, is dead.

What?

But... she was the healthy one.

I know. But then she got typhus
and d*ed, like all the others.

Jesus. Poor Sue.

Yeah, so just... be respectful
of her situation. Okay?

You don't have to tell me to
be respectful of my best friend.

Be respectful of the woman
who's going to be my wife.

Because I could not stop for Death -

[FATHER] Well, we are
very happy for you.

I mean, we're very sorry
about your sister, Sue.

But we're very happy you two shall wed.

So, Austin, what are your plans?

Oh, yes, dear, tell us.

Well, obviously, nothing
is decided yet, but...

there is a firm in Michigan,

and they have offered me a position.

And Sue has a cousin there, so...

So what?

So we're thinking of moving to Detroit.

I'm pretty psyched about it, actually.

I don't think so.

You shall join my firm
and remain here in Amherst.

Wha...

But, Father, like I just
said, I wanna go out west.

Nonsense, we can't
have you living so far.

This is Amherst. You're a Dickinson.

Your grandfather lived here
and his father before that,

right here in this house.

So what do you expect? Sue and I
will get married and live upstairs?

Of course not. Don't be absurd.

- You shall live next door.
- Next door?

What?

What, in the Irish shanties?

With the stable boys?

Austin, collect yourself.

The lot adjacent has come up
for sale. I mean to purchase it.

We shall build you a house.

The most modern and
most elegant of homes.

You shall oversee the design yourselves.

It shall be built by the fall.

Consider it a wedding gift.

Austin.

Look.

What?

Is this some kind of joke?

You're marrying my
brother. Are you insane?

What else was I supposed to do,
Emily? My entire family is dead.

Yes, I know, and I feel
terrible about that.

But Austin?

You don't even like him!

You told me you don't
respect his intellect.

Besides, I thought we
were never getting married.

I thought that we were gonna grow up

and become great writers together.

That's a stupid promise we
made when we were years old.

And even then I knew it was a
lie. I'm not like you, Emily.

I didn't grow up with money.

I don't have your perfect life.

You think my life is perfect?

Do you even know me?

[SUE] I'm all alone in this world.

I'm destitute.

If I don't marry Austin, I
will literally starve to death.

[SIGHS]

I'm sorry about Mary.

I really liked her.

Yeah, I liked her too.
She was my favorite sister.

Well, I guess, since
you're marrying Austin...

I'll be your sister now.

Promise me something, Sue.

Okay, promise me two things.

One: That you won't
move away to Michigan.

And two:

That you'll always
love me more than him.

As far as the first one goes,

it's really Austin's decision.

But as far as the second...

Yeah?

Well...

I wouldn't worry too
much about that one.

[THUNDER RUMBLES]

["BE MINE" PLAYING]

I love you.

[SONG CONTINUES]

- Sue.
- Sue.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Sue!

Where were you?

[HORSE GRUNTING]

[HORSE SNORTS]

He kindly stopped for me -

Emily, what are you looking at?

Death.

Um...

Never mind, Lavinia.

Okay. Let's go home.

That was a lovely
funeral, don't you think?

Mine'll be better.

You coulda had any girl in
town, and you picked Sue Gilbert?

Why?

I think it's because she's the
only one who didn't want me.

Well, I can relate to that.

- Your sister's still playing hard to get.
- [CHUCKLES]

"Hard to get". That's a
nice way of putting it.

- She's a freak.
- She's a genius.

So sick of people saying that.

Hello, ladies.

What are you doin' here, George?

Sue, come here. I wanna
talk to you about something.

Well, babe, it's done.

Your poem. It's in The Indicator.

Right next to a thing I
wrote about Percy Shelley.

The printers have it.
It'll be out next week.

You're a little bit famous
now, Emily Dickinson.

Emily? What's wrong?

I'm just...

scared.

You?

You're not afraid of anything.

You're absolutely fearless.

I just don't know how
my father will react.

Seriously? Come on.

He has to know how brilliant you are.

And that's not something he'd
wanna stand in the way of.

Is it?

[LAVINIA] Emily!

Emily!

Come make dinner!

I gotta go.

Thanks again, George.

[EXHALES]

[GRUNTS]

[FATHER] A wonderful
chicken, Mrs. Dickinson.

- [MOTHER] Oh.
- Oh, yes, it really is delicious, Mother.

Well, thank your sisters. They helped.

One of us did.

- [MOTHER] Girls.
- Now, now, listen here.

I have a rather exciting announcement.

As you know, in addition to
running my successful law practice,

as well as maintaining my position
as treasurer of Amherst College,

I have served two terms

in the Massachusetts
House of Representatives.

Well, now I have my
eye on something bigger.

I've decided to run for Congress.

- Father, that's marvelous.
- Way to go, Dad.

Thank you. I appreciate your enthusiasm.

Your mother was quite
opposed to the idea.

Well, I just don't want
you away from home so much.

Candidates are always moving about.

Well, we've gotta get out
the vote, now, don't we?

The vote and the message.

Father, are you an abolitionist?

Oh, no, I wouldn't say that.

I don't take any kind
of radical position.

I think sl*very is wrong, of course.

But I also believe in compromise.

I certainly don't think it's something
we ought to go to w*r over.

Very sensible, dear.

Yes.

Sometimes I feel like a sl*ve.

You are a spoiled girl
from Amherst, Emily.

Far from a sl*ve.

[FATHER] It's a messy business,

but we must keep the Union
together at all costs.

- That's my platform.
- [MOTHER] Mm-hmm.

That and let's bring the
railroad to Amherst. That too.

Oh, the railroad? That's fancy.

Yes, Lavinia, if I'm elected,

you will hear a train whistle
outside your bedroom window.

That sounds like a nightmare.

Yes, well, congratulations, Father.

Now, we have an
announcement to make as well.

Sue and I have discussed it

and we've decided we're
not moving to Detroit.

We're staying here in Amherst

- with the family.
- [FATHER] Excellent. Excellent.

This is wonderful news.

- Hooray!
- Excellent.

You can hold the firm together
while I'm off running my campaign.

And we'll have a big, lovely wedding.

We'll invite all the
Dickinson and Norcross cousins.

And, Sue, of course, your
whole family will come.

My whole family is dead.

Well, it'll still be very nice.

Yes, Emily, what is it?

I also have an announcement.

It's not anything crazy.

You know, compared to Congress and

getting married and what have you.

Okay, well, what is it then?

A poem that I wrote...

will be published in
the college magazine.

I don't think I heard you correctly.

Would you say that again?

My... My poem...

will be published.

How dare you.

Have I or have I not
made myself quite clear

that I do not approve of a
woman seeking to build herself

a literary reputation, Emily?

And now you've gone and done it!

[EXHALES]

Is there any way to stop this?

It's already gone to print.

My God. You wicked girl.
Your mother was right.

We have given you too much freedom

and now you have taken
advantage of our kindness.

And this is a bad time, Emily.

This is a very bad time indeed

for you to exhibit such
scandalous behavior!

My God!

You will ruin the
good name of Dickinson.

- Let's go.
- [CAT MEOWS]

The Dickinsons have lived
in Amherst for years.

We've made this town what it is.

Everybody knows that.

But your grandfather...

[SIGHS]

he was a drunk and a debtor.

And he practically squandered everything

that my ancestors
worked so hard to build.

I've spent my life cleaning up his mess!

I've scrimped and I've sacrificed.

And I will not have my efforts
undone by my own daughter, damn it!

This foolishness of yours,
we will have no more of it!

You will tend to your
duties as your mother does.

You have much room
for improvement there.

You see?

You see, this plate is chipped. You see?

You set the table, didn't you?

Do you mean to give the master
of the house a chipped plate?

[SNIFFS]

For your punishment, you
will clean up in here.

And in the kitchen.

Alone.

["BURY A FRIEND" PLAYING]

Nice to see you.

You were late.

Most people would be
glad if I never came.

Not me.

I always wanna see you.

Mm.

So, your poem's gonna get published.

No.

My dad won't allow it.

I thought you said it
was too late to stop it.

My father will burn
every copy if he has to.

Anything to prevent me from
"ruining the good name of Dickinson".

My darling...

you'll be the only Dickinson
they talk about in years.

I promise you that.

Even if my poems are never published?

Publicity is not the
same thing as immortality.

Immortality is nothing.

All it takes is being very good

and well-behaved and
then you go to heaven.

See, that's not the kind I mean.

Your type of immortality won't
come from you following the rules.

It's gonna come from you breaking them.

[LAUGHS]

When will you come for me?

I come for you every night, my darling.

Not just for a ride.

To take me away from this place.

Not for many, many years.

[SONG CONTINUES]

[SIGHS]

Why do you always take so long?

I don't know.

I'm busy.

You're always busy.

And soon I shall be more so.

There's a w*r brewing, you know.

A big one.

One that shall divide this nation.

[SONG CONTINUES]

[SIGHS]

Another fight with Dad, huh?

Don't be too hard on him, Em.

I know he can be tough, but
he only wants to protect us.

Can I tell you a secret?

I'm happy we're not moving to Detroit.

I feel better here, with the family.

[MOTHER] Emily, get to bed.

We need you up bright and early
tomorrow. Another suitor is coming.

Mm. Great.

Who is it this time?

A pig farmer from South Hadley.

Sexy.

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

Who is it?

[FATHER] Emily, are you awake?

Yes, Father.

May I come in?

Yes, you may.

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

You just can't know how I
worry about you children.

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, Father.

Father, what is it? Don't...

Don't cry.

I just don't want to lose you.

Promise me, Emily.

Promise... Promise you what?

Just promise me...

you won't get married and move away.

I won't leave you, Dad.

Keep the family together.
That's what I say.

[MOANS SOFTLY]

- Hey, Dad?
- Hm?

Can you promise me something too?

Oh, yes, what is it, my dear?

Promise me...

that we can get a maid.

[FATHER CHUCKLES]

Oh, Emily. All right.

All right.

[FATHER SNORES]

[EMILY] Because I could
not stop for Death -

He kindly stopped for me -

The Carriage held

but just Ourselves -

And Immortality.

Nailed it.