05x20 - Young & Yacht'in

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Young & Hungry". Aired June 2014 - July 2018.*
Watch/Buy Amazon


"Young & Hungry" follows wealthy young tech entrepreneur Josh, who hires a feisty young food blogger named Gabi to be his new personal chef. Desperate to keep her new job, Gabi must prove her skills to Josh and his personal aide Elliot, who would prefer a celebrity chef for the job instead. The series is loosely based upon the life of San Francisco food blogger Gabi Moskowitz.
Post Reply

05x20 - Young & Yacht'in

Post by bunniefuu »

I can't believe my boyfriend just
went out and bought a yacht.

Ha! I can't believe I'm best friends
with someone who's boyfriend

just went out
and bought a yacht.

Welcome, everybody! Oh, I'm
so glad you guys are here.

This is gonna be
an amazing trip.

So, I just want you guys to, uh,
relax, enjoy the open seas,

and all the luxuries
on the S.S. Dock Com.

Get it? It's a...
It's a play on words.

It's a play on "dot com", but
it's a boat, so it's "dock com."

Ooh, what about Yacht Com?

(OTHERS APPROVING)

It's... Uh... The boat's
already painted, Yolanda!

I never told you this, Alan. But
boats make me feel very sexual.

Let's look around for places where
we can get naughty on the yachty.

And while we're looking,
we can make note

of where they keep
all the life jackets.

Uh-huh.

- Could this get any better?
- I know, right?

I mean, you're on vacation
with your boyfriend,

I'm on vacation
with my boyfriend.

It's a work call, babe.

He's defending a huge drug
lord, how hot is that?

(GLASSES CLINKING)

Hey, uh, Nick. Don't forget, we gotta
finish talking about those papers

- I was tellin' you about.
- What papers?

Ha! That's a lawyer for you.
Just keepin' it confidential.

Ladies, I'll tell you what,
why don't you enjoy your drinks,

and Nick and I will finish
talkin' about the legal stuff.

Here's a dollar. You're officially my lawyer.

Now you have to keep my secret.

Uh-oh, what'd you do?

Hi, there!

I'm Yolanda.

Is the captain allowed to join
me for a glass of champagne?

I wish, but I have your life
in my hands.

Oooh, I like a man
who's good with his hands.

A wedding band.

Is what I play in
on the weekends.

Gotta go rehearse! Bye!

(SINGING TO HERSELF)

Okay.
I'm gonna say it.

Nick... inside this box...

is an engagement ring.

Josh, we barely
know each other.

(LAUGHS) See, that would be
funny if I wasn't freaking out,

but I am freaking out, because...
I'm proposing to Gabi tonight.

Congratulations, man!
I'm... I'm happy for you.

- Thanks!
- She's a great girl.

She is a great girl.
Do you think she'll say yes?

I think she'll say yes.
Do you think she'll say yes?

I would.

Thanks, man. Now, the reason I made
you my lawyer is 'cause I need you

to hide this ring.
I trust no one on this boat!

Got it.

I need you to put it
somewhere Gabi won't find it.

I'll pick it up from you before
dinner, and I'll pop the question

beneath a sky
full of beautiful fireworks.

Josh, as your friend,
I'm so happy for you.

As your lawyer, have you
considered a prenup?

It's a big boat.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

♪ She in the spotlight ♪

♪ And she turn my head ♪

♪ She run a red light ♪

♪ 'Cause she bad like that ♪

♪ I like that ooh, baby,
ooh, baby ♪


♪ Baby, I like that
ooh, baby, ooh, baby ♪


Two Mai Tais?

And Mai Tai say, it's nice
to have some other boys

in the boat like me.

Do you have a Mai Tai
for me, too?

No.

I like him.
And he winked at me.

I beg to differ.
He winked at me.

Wait a second.
You don't think he might want...

Both of us?

You mean for like, a...
(SUCKING ON STRAW)

Yes. Exactly for like a...
(SUCKING ON STRAW)

It's too bad we'd never
do anything like that.

Or would we?

Of course we wouldn't.

That's not the kind of people
we are.

Or are we?

Hey! There's my girl!

Hey! Where've you been hiding?

I haven't been hiding anything!

It's just so beautiful out here,

I really wanna enjoy Yacht Com
with you.

You know, when you say anything,

it's really cute,
but it's... it's Dock Com!

Dock!

Gabi, it's not
just the champagne.

All the drinks are free!

Ooh.

Okay, are you ready
for the next surprise?

There's more surprises?

All right.
Close your eyes.

Just Gabi, Sofia.

Okay. Open 'em.

(GASPS)

Hi, Gabi!

Oh my god!

You're Iron Chef
Alex Guarnaschelli,

who b*at Judy Joo
with the secret ingredient,

mortadella, and you're
the executive chef

at Butter restaurant
in New York!

Alex Guarnaschelli, I love you,
Alex Guarnaschelli!

You can call me Alex.

Alex Guarnaschelli!

Oh! Ooh!

(GASP)

Uh-oh. You made Iron Chef
Alex Guarnaschelli bleed.

(SUCKING ON STRAW)

(PHONE RINGS)

Hey, Santiago.

You're not going to jail.

They can't connect you
to the missing drug shipments.

Trust me.
I'll take care of it.

I'm so sorry I took your
chopping hand out of commission.

Well, luckily, my wine glass
holding hand is just fine.

(LAUGHS)

All right, so give me the rundown.
Where are we?

Okay, the soupe de
poisson is simmering,

the buckwheat galette
batter is resting,

and the salmon is poaching.

And I hope you don't mind, when
you went to get some more wine,

I made a basil garlic rouille
to give the soup some kick.

No no, my soupe de poisson
is a gentle dish.

An overgarlic-y rouille
could decimate it.

You know what?
This is delicious.

Balanced, great flavor.

Inspired.

Thank you, Chef.

Gabi, to me there are
two kinds of chefs:

There are the kind of chefs
that follow orders

and view cooking
as a science.

And then there are the ones who are
intuitive and cook like it's an art.

I've been working with you all day,

and you're definitely the second one.

And, uh, which one do you like?

The second one,
they're much harder to find.

Oh. Well, ya found me.

And I'm not gonna lose you.
I wanna mentor you,

and I want you
to be the sous-chef

in my new restaurant
in Pioneer Square.

Oh my god, are you serious?
Wait... Uh, you're not just

saying that because you paired
the Pinot with the pain meds?

I wanna mentor you,
and I wanna work with you.

Oh my god, I...
I'm so excited,

I can't even remember where in
San Francisco Pioneer Square is.

It's in Seattle.
Is that a problem?

Seattle!
Which is in Washington,

which is a different state than
the one that San Francisco is in.

No, that's not a problem
at all.

- Gabi!
- Sofia!

- Gabi!
- Sofia!

BOTH:
Did you get my text?

I have a huge problem.

Mine's huge-r.

All right,
let's go alphabetically.

What?
You... You always say that.

Well, "G" comes before "S".
I didn't write the alphabet.

Well, I didn't ask for a
boyfriend who's a drug smuggler.

What?

I was walking by the porthole
of our room, and I saw Nick,

hiding a package in the air vent,
and it's gotta be dr*gs, Gabi,

because it was wrapped
in brown paper, and

nothing good is ever
wrapped in brown paper.

Except fresh fish, which is what I

would be unwrapping, if I took the job

that Alex Guarnaschelli just offered

me in her new restaurant in Seattle!

- What?
- I mean, what am I gonna do?

I have
an unbelievable boyfriend,

but this is an
unbelievable opportunity.

Well, I can't be a criminal's
girlfriend, I mean... You know,

every little girl
dreams about it, but...

Do you know what percentage
of couples survive

in a long-distance
relationship?

No.

Yeah, I was really hopin'
you did, but I'm guessin'

it's pretty low.

Why don't you look it up while
we break into the air vent?

Okay. Wait a minute. Hey, why are
we fixing your problem first?

It's alphabetical. "Breaking into"
comes before "moving out of."

Dammit!

That sunset is breathtaking.

As Joseph Conrad said, "There
is nothing more mysterious

than the sea itself. She is the
mistress of my existence."

(CHUCKLING) Well, doesn't
your wife get upset

that you have a mistress?

You mean my late wife.

Yolanda, this is Marilou.

Gone five years today.

I... I'm so sorry.

I'm scattering her ashes on
this voyage, along with this.

Time to close that chapter.

Hm, hell yeah, it is.

I mean, how sad it is.

It is, but, uh, I have to say it's a

little less sad with you here, Yolanda.

Now if you excuse me, I have to check
the PH balance on the Jacuzzi.

A captain's work
is never done.

Hey, Marilou.

You cool with me sharin' the
motion of the ocean with your man?

(AS MARILOU) I'm cool!

Oh!

Oh my damn! Oh my damn! Oh, Marilou.

Oh... Oh, I need some ashes.

I know. Time to replace
Marilou with Mary Jane.

Maybe that's why
they call it the high seas.

Alan! I spoke to Amador,
and we were right.

He wants us both
and it is on.

Oh god.
Now I'm nervous.

Have you had a three-way before?

Tons of times!

Couple of times.

Once.
In college.

In camp.

No.

Elliot, to be honest, I'm not
even sure how a threesome works.

Well, how complicated
can it be?

You have your usual top, and bottom...
and really, you're just adding a middle.

Like a bagel!

- Yeah.
- Top, bottom, and a schmear.

Who's the schmear?

Why are we having
sex and a snack?

Hey, guys.

How about a quick nosh?

Make sure we have enough
energy for later.

Captain? How's it goin'?

Mr. Kaminski,
I know why you're here.

The PH balance in the Jacuzzi
has been restored.

You're a married man, right?

I was.
Twenty-five years.

- Happiest time of my life.
- That's good to hear.

Okay, so you know the girl
I'm with? Gabi?

The one who cut the chef?

Yeah.
That's the one.

Well, we've been together
for three years, and I love her.

And tonight, I'm gonna ask her
to marry me.

That sounds beautiful.

It is! It will be. I hope... so.

I guess I'm just nervous
about asking her.

Is that how you felt
when you were gonna propose?

You mean, was I nervous?
Freaked out?

Totally and completely in love with
a woman I knew I didn't deserve,

but prayed would have me anyway?

Thanks, Captain.

Oh my god, if there are
dr*gs in this box,

it could ruin
everything with Nick.

I can't open it, you do it.

Okay.

Oh my god, is it heroin?

Smack? Crank? cr*ck?
Crystal? Grams? Jacks? Pops?

Sofia, some of those
are cereals.

Okay, it's not cr*ck
but it is a rock.

Oh my god.
That's an engagement ring.

Wait... Nick's gonna ask me
to marry him?

That was so fast,
it's only been like five weeks!

Six.

So, what are you saying,
are you gonna say yes?

I mean, this could change
my entire life.

Ah... I know. I mean, if I was
to take that job in Seattle,

it could change my whole life, not to

mention my whole
relationship with Josh.

- I'm gonna say yes.
- Really?

Yeah! I mean, I can go back and
forth forever, but the truth is...

I love him.

And... at a certain point, you
just have to take a leap of faith.


How do you know? I mean, how do
you know it's not gonna go bad?

Well, that's the faith part.

Gotta hope you're doing
the right thing.

Oh my god, Sofia,
you're getting married!

(SCREAMING)
I'm getting married!

Oh my god, the ring!

- (WATER SPLASHING)
- Oh my god!

Sofia!

Gabi, you saved my life, I mean,
you didn't even think to yourself,

Like, what if something bad
happened, you just went for it.

What was there to think about?
You're my best friend.

I... I took a leap of faith.

- Listen, Gabi...
- Josh...

No, I almost lost you, and I'm
not waiting another second.

Alex Guarnaschelli asked me to be a
sous-chef at her new restaurant.

And she wants to be my mentor,

- but...
- But... what?

But it's in Seattle.

And...

How can you say no?

It's your dream.

(FIREWORKS GOING OFF)

(MURMURING)

Wow, Nick.
You really went all out.

What?

Um... I found the ring,

in the air vent, and then,
again in the ocean,

and um...
the answer is yes.

I will marry you.

Oh, uh, actually...

Actually, congratulations, man.

Oh... So romantic.

Yeah.

- Yolanda!
- Uh... What's happenin', Captain?

We're headed to San Francisco.

Mr. Kaminski made me
turn the boat around.

Which means I'll have
to scatter Marilou's

ashes a little earlier than planned.

No! No. I mean, I'm... I'm
feelin' so, uh, empty.

And it's makin' me woozy.
Oh... Hold me!

Ah... Oh, yeah. It's just...

I was overcome with emotion.

Ahh... But I'm good now.

Ah... You can go ahead
and dump her.

Aah! I got bars!
I got bars!

Okay, we gotta call my mom
and tell her the news.

-Um...
-Hey, um, have you guys
seen Josh?

I mean the Yacht Com
isn't that big.

Hi, Mom, it's Sofia.

- Okay, um, Nick and I are getting...
- Ahp...

You hung up.
Why'd you hang up?

I'm sorry, I can't take it anymore.
I have to tell you something.

Sofia, that ring wasn't meant
for you.

What? What do you mean? Like...

Like this is a temporary
one, and the real one's

being sized or something?

I wasn't gonna propose.
That was Josh's ring for Gabi.

What?

Yeah.
I hid it for Josh
in the air vent.

So... this ring
wasn't meant for me?

It was meant for you!

It wasn't meant for you,
it was meant for me?

Oh my god! Josh was gonna
ask me to marry him...

What are you talking about?

Josh had the whole thing planned, the...
the dinner, the fireworks.

Oh my god... Oh my god! Where is he?
Where is he? Where is he?

- Hey, have you seen Josh?
- He left right when we docked.

Oh my god.

(SIGH)

Sofia, I... I... I feel horrible,
I... I'm mortified.

No, I'm mortified
that I said yes.

I mean, (LAUGHS) we've only been
dating for like five weeks.

Six.

It's the best six weeks of my life.

Mine too.

So, um... you wanna go
have "I can't believe

you didn't ask me to marry you" sex?

I do.

Did you really have
to use those two words?

You were gonna propose?

- Gabi...
- How could you not tell me?

How could you not tell me
that those fireworks for me,

that this ring was for me?

How could I tell you?

You told me you were moving
to Seattle.

But I... I... I didn't know
you were gonna propose.

Well, I'm glad you didn't know, because
you gave me an honest reaction.

When I saw them pullin' you
out of the water,

the only thing I could think was,
please God, just let her be okay.

- Josh...
- And then you opened your eyes,

and I knew in that very moment I
would never ask for anything again,

because the girl who means
everything to me... she was okay.

And now that I had her,
I was never gonna let her go.

Then I said I was going away.

Which k*lled me the most,
because Gabi, when you told me

you were leaving to become
a chef, your face lit up.

It lit up the exact same way it did the

first day you came to work for me.

Do you remember that?

W- We were having dinner,

and you told me about Julia Child...
and your mom,

and your hopes
and... and your dreams.

Yeah, of course I remember.

Well, Gabi, now that you have a sh*t
at making those dreams happen...

I'm not gonna be the one
to stand in your way.

Well, then, I'm gonna
stand in my way.

Because you're forgetting
what else happened that night.

That was the night
that we fell for each other.

So that means that my dream
includes you and Julia Child.

So you know what? I...
I'm not gonna take

this job in Seattle, I'm not gonna go,

- I'm gonna stay here with you.
- No, G... No! No! No!

What do you mean,
no, no, no?

Gabi, I'm not proposing.

You can't not propose, you were gonna
propose, you can't un-propose!

But I haven't proposed
in the first place,

so there can't be
an un-proposal!

Josh...

Gabi, if the girl I met
that night stays here

and doesn't chase her dream...

she's gonna regret it
for the rest of her life.

Well, that girl's dream
has changed.

No, it hasn't.

Don't tell me what
that girl's dream is.

I know that girl.

And yeah, her dream
is to be a chef, but

part of that dream is to be with you.

Josh, these last three years have
been the best years of my life.

And I'm not gonna
let that go.

When Sofia and I were on that
yacht, we started talking about

taking a leap of faith, and I think
I'm gonna do that right now.

Gabi, what are you doing?

Josh?

I love you. And I have to
take this job for myself,

but I don't wanna do it
without you.

Will you marry me
and come with me to Seattle?

Damn, look at all these stars.

I could stare at them all night.

I could stare at you all night.

Why don't I grab us a
bottle of champagne

and I'll meet you in my quarters?

Coming from the bow, second
on the left, starboard side.

Second door from the left bow,
on the Star Trek side. (LAUGHS)

Ooh, I'm finally gonna
get to see the captain's dinghy.

Okay, Amador will be here
any second.

We are not getting off this boat
without having a threesome.

I'm so nervous.

Maybe I should
turn off the lights.

Good idea. Let the
moonlight set the mood.

ALAN:
Here comes the schmear.

ELLIOT: (QUIETLY) He's so
much bigger than I remember.

ALAN: (QUIETLY)
Ooh, so musky.

ELLIOT: (QUIETLY)
Like a wildebeest.

ALL:
Mmmm...

ELLIOT:
That's it, yeah.

YOLANDA: Yeah!

(ALL SCREAMING)

Okay. I can do a four-gy.

(ALL SCREAMING)
Post Reply