03x07 - Revenge Fantasy

[bunniefuu]

Ian: Previously on "Working Moms"...

- He has like rage issues.
- How am I supposed to relax

if you're talking sh*t behind my back.

- (Big splash)
- (Horrified gasp)

Jenny you are a hero.

- (Zoe coughs)
- I am.

As parents, we wanna try
to avoid passing down

some of our less desirable
attributes, you know.

- (Pained grunts)
- Hey! Did you touch her?!

I'm not sure I follow.

Our clinic is closing down soon.

What happened, you saved all the women?

A developer bought the land.

Become this developer's worst nightmare.

These guys are clearly
willing to play dirty.

- Hi.
- Mike: Are you?

(Waking moan)

Ugh.

♪

♪ Stay as you've always been ♪

♪ Stay as you've always been ♪

♪ Save a seat ♪

Hmm.

♪ Stay as you've always been ♪

♪ The world using you ♪

♪ Needs you to dry the tears ♪

♪ Needs you to dry the tears ♪

(Products clatter into bag)

Nathan: Yeah. What does the cow say?

- What does the cow say?
- Moo, moo, moo.

- Moo, moo.
- Moo.

- Moo.
- Moo.

Moo.

Oh hey.

We're not back together.

What? I wasn't thinking that.

Okay, it's just the bathroom up there,

you kept all my toiletries,
my toothbrush.

Okay look, I had zero expectations,

you're the one that showed up here.

Yeah, and that was a mistake
and I'm going to leave.

Jesus, did you take all the toiletries?

Do you know how expensive eye cream is?

(Doorbell rings)

- Narla.
- Oh. Are you two still?

Yeah just shh.

Okay I'm late,
I gotta go home and then to the clinic,

but my mom will be by later.

Oh, uh, I was gonna work from home today

so Narla could do her thing

and then I'll drop the
kids by your place later?

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

Thanks.

Holy sh*t, oh.

(Groans)

(Door opens and shuts)

♪

Well, if he'd just give me
back the nudes that he took

I wouldn't be angry.

Honestly, I just wanna
break into his stupid house.

Okay, let's explore that fantasy.

What do you mean?

If you could do anything,
what would you do?

Uh, I'd break his computer.

And?

And I would smash his camera
and his precious fancy photography gear.

And how does that make you feel?

Does, does that make you feel powerful?

- Hell yeah.
- Great, keep going.

Oh man, okay.

I would take a hammer
and I would punch a hole

in everything that he owns.

(Knock on door)

Oh.

- What happened?
- Well...

How did we miss registration day?

You know those city-run programs

just fill up super fast.

I was, I was pressing
refresh like a mad woman and,

and still no dice.

Okay, I took a small pee break.

You don't pee on registration day.

Rhoda needs to be somewhere

because I have a conference
so you need to enroll her

into a private camp
and get her to school.

Oh.

- Umm...
- Bye Frank.

- Okay, come on, girl.
- Val: Brenda, Brenda,

your noodle necklace. Brenda!

Brenda, your child's new
creations are precious, here.

Charlatan.

Ah, hey Val,

are you still running that, um,
kids camp over March break?

I am and registration is full up.

Goddammit,

I really need something
for Rhodes this spring.

Hmm, perhaps a favor for a favor?

I'm listening.

Someone just lost their daughter's spot,

and by someone I mean that bitch
who doesn't appreciate noodle art.

Look at this, I mean...

- I'm keeping it.
- Yeah, okay.

So I saw her running towards the pool
and I didn't even think, I just jumped.

Wow.

Yeah and when,
when we came out of the water

she was like coughing and crying.

I mean I had to give her mouth to mouth.

It was traumatizing.

So you performed CPR
on a breathing child?

(Food crunches)

Okay, what's your point?

Jenny, can I talk to you?

Yeah, it happened, Gary.

I need your help with something.

Oh,

staff evaluations because
I have some opinions.

Sort of, um...
I need you to take over for Laura,

she has to run away
for a family emergency.

- Is it more money?
- No.

- Can I decorate her office?
- No.

- Can I tell people what to do?
- Yes.

When do I start?

- Oh.
- Now.

What's this?

It's the quarterly review,
it's due this week.

Just assess who's doing well,
who isn't, and let me know.

You sure it's not more money?

♪

So I've put together
a marketing campaign.

Look, I know you think
you're about to get shut down

but I can help you,
we can stop Elevation Realty.

That's impressive but
we can't afford it.

Oh, even though
I'm offering you my services

at 100% discount?

I mean, surely you have some capital.

- I have $200.
- I'm sorry?

Kate, I, I don't know what kind of money

your regular clients are
used to working with,

but last year our budget
produced one flyer

for drug resistant gonorrhea.

It can resist dr*gs?

Uh, here's the deal.

Now all our money has to go
towards our programs;

assistance for new mothers,
free HIV testing,

subsidized birth control, free tampons.

Oh free tampons, that's nice.

No offense but I,
I think you're the kind of woman

who's never had to
think twice about that,

but many of our mothers
have to make a choice

whether they buy tampons for themselves

or diapers for their children.

That's awful.

Yeah um...

uh, but look if you wanna
keep providing your services

you gotta stop Elevation, right?

Uh.

Would you consider
redistributing your funds

to maybe securing your future?

We can't do that,
we won't have our clients free bleeding

in the streets.

(Exasperated sigh)

(Door slams)

(Phone chimes, vibrates)

_

- (Phone chimes, vibrates)
- Oh.

(Engine turns)

(Bell rings, low hum of chatter)

Oh, I hate her.

I know, I even tried to skip
school today to miss her class.

Yeah. I would too.

- I am starving, want some?
- Yeah.

Uh... here.

Thanks.

(Clears throat) Once again, Miss Carson,

breaking the rules,

no eating in the hallway.

Brenna, donne moi, hmm.

Enleve le chapeau.

The hat Brenna, take off the hat.

(Sighs)

- (Food crunches)
- (Locker slams)

- God, I wish we could just...
- Get her back?

We could you know.

Val: Let me just...

I'm not sure, the whole level is.

- Where I put it.
- We don't actually.

If you tighten it now though.

- Okay, there you go.
- There you go

and then you know cause
the bubble tells you.

Thanks a lot, Frank,
really appreciate the help.

Yeah, no problem at all.

Uh. Oh, Frank we have company.

(Boys arguing)

These are my boys.

Jacob, Joseph,
what are you doing home from school?

I'm hungry.

And I have second period spare,
a double lunch,

so what the f*ck else
am I supposed to do?

Your hair's gross, lady.

Jo Jo, that's no way to speak
to your mother's friend.

Yeah? Well maybe I'd be a
little more well-behaved

if I wasn't eating frozen
lasagna all the time.

Oh, frozen dinners are the
only things I can buy in bulk.

- Is that the last piece?
- No.

- Dude!
- It's mine!

- Give it to me.
- It's mine.

Dude! I already bit it.

You want it, eat it.

(Frightened gasp)

Do not make me call the police again.

Stop talking, mom! I'm so horny!

(Door slams)

(Camera clicks)

Is he okay?

They haven't been the same
since the mountie left.

- You okay?
- Oh yeah, yeah,

motherhood is a miracle.

Cool, can I grab those camp forms?

Yes.

Okay, do you wanna add it first?

Let's see what it looks like, cool.

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

Here we go.

And then she basically throws me out.

(Chuckles)

I mean, I thought I did my
research but Hannah's right,

I don't know enough about the cause.

Okay. well, let's talk about it,
what do they do?

Well, it's a hassle-free clinic

so they subsidize a lot for
underprivileged patients.

That's good.

You know, birth control, tampons,

I mean, I'm buying tampons
left and right,

I don't even think about
how much they cost.

Uh-huh.

- Holy sh*t.
- Here we go.

- That's it, isn't it?
- Mmm-hmm.

We gotta show people what
happens if this clinic closes.

What would happen?

Well, for starters, women would be
free bleeding in the streets.

That would definitely get my attention.

Yeah, you and the media.
I'm gonna call Hannah.

See, you're amazing.

Well, you sort of got me there.

Oh, I take great pride
in getting women there.

Nobody says that.

Kate, remember you got your...
Oh my God is that your dad?

What? No. Forrest, my father's dead,

this is Mike Bolinski,

and what have I said about
walking into my office

- during a meeting?
- Uh, nothing.

Well, it should be assumed
that you don't.

All right. Look, I gotta get going,

but good luck with the clinic

and uh, we'll do dinner soon, huh?

You don't have to go.

Ah, looks like you got your hands full.

Teach him how to ride a bike too?

- I know how to ride a bike.
- Uh, sure you do, buddy.

Forrest, just, uh...

(Sighs)

Hi Hannah, it's Kate Foster,
I got an idea.

(Low hum of chatter)

Madam Pellerin,

I'm sorry about earlier,
I made these for you.

Oh that's so sweet, merci Alice.

Mmm, they're delicious,

but I can't possibly eat them all.

Who wants a cookie?

♪

No?

♪

(Phone rings)

Kate Foster PR,

destroyer of hearts and
all around bitch face.

Oh my God,

you can't answer the phone
like that this is a business.

Oh, okay, but it's okay
for you to humiliate me.

Forrest, I have every right to tell you

- not to interrupt a meeting.
- I'm talking about Mike.

Okay, he's a colleague
and even if he wasn't,

you have no right.

- To be upset at my future wife?
- I am not your future wife.

Oh, so you f*ck everyone you work with.

- What? Nope. No.
- Oh yeah. That makes sense.

What are you doing?

You wanna trash my heart,
I'm gonna trash your desk.

(Objects thud lightly)

- This is your desk.
- Whatever.

Forrest, come on, come clean this up.

You know what, I quit.

- (Ringing tone)
- (Keys clack)

Yeah, nope, wrong.

(Exhale) sh*t, pick up.

Hi, I've been meaning to call you.

Yeah hi, I just got a promotion at work,

and I need you to pick up Zoe at school,

- can you do that?
- Yeah sure.

- Thanks, I gotta go.
- Wait.

- What?
- Have you been telling people

that I'm mean to you
because Gina said that you said

that I have rage issues?

- Does that even sound like me?
- Um... yeah.

- Does that sound like you?
- Well, I mean I,

I guess I lost my temper
a couple times but...

Then I think we know the truth.

- And what's that?
- I gotta go.

So any progress?

Well, these numbers are pitiful,

I swear to God,
Gary's doing better than half the people

in the office and that's like so boring.

Ah, well is anyone dipping
really below average?

- Gina.
- Oh.

She's really dragging ass.

Well, do something about it.

♪

Okay, Mom, can you just
put him on the phone?

Well, I know that he can't talk,

I just wanna hear his breath,
uh, I gotta go.

Kiss Luca for me, okay?

So I'm going to be tracking
your sales while Laura's gone.

I'm sorry, I, (Crying)

I had no idea how hard
coming back would be.

Like I'm feeling really,
really guilty here.

Oh my God, I'm leaking.

Yeah, you should pump more.

(Crying)

- I should.
- Stop...

just stop.

You need to do better around here.

What?

I just got out of mat leave
like a minute ago, Jenny.

Well, that's not an excuse,
pull yourself together,

this is a place of work so do it

or find another job.

Uh, bitch.

♪

(Stomach rumbling)

- Can I go to the bathroom?
- Can't leave during a test.

(Stomach rumbling)

(Stomachs rumbling)

- I need to go!
- Please wait for the bell.

I can't, I'm gonna friggen' poo.

Hey wait, stop!

It's a test.

♪

♪

♪

(Slow Opera music)

(Pained grunts)

(Garbage lid thuds)

(Slow motion) Don't look at me.

Don't look at me.

Don't look at me! Look away. (Crying)

Look away.

♪

(Phone rings)

Dr. Carlson.

Hello, this is Principal Baker
with Eastern Elementary,

we have a situation with Alice.

Did she forget her gym clothes again
because I swear to God.

Well, I'll have you know
I keep my laxatives

on a very high shelf.

I don't know how this
could have happened,

Brenna's not even
allowed to use the oven.

Yeah, Alice isn't either
unless she's supervised.

So 20 kids sh*t themselves?

- And their teacher.
- Is she okay?

I'm afraid we had to
call poison control,

she's at the hospital.

Alice, did you do this?

Brenna, I want you to tell the truth.

- This is my fault.
- Oh my God, Brenna.

I told Alice we should make them
at Alice's house with her dad's meds.

Okay, Brenna and Alex will
both write 1000 words essays

on the dangers of deliberately
contaminating food

and spend three days in detention.

That's it Alice,
we're taking your phone away.

Well, you're grounded
and you're not gonna see Alice anymore.

- And you're not seeing Brenna.
- Mom, please!

- Stop it.
- If I may,

I don't think it's wise
to separate the girls.

In my experience,
four parents with total transparency

about behavior might be
better than two sets

who don't communicate at all.

Yeah. We can do that.

Total transparency, deal?

Deal.

I'm sorry I'm sweating so much,

I, I also had a cookie, so.

(Phone vibrates)

Hey, Nathan.

Are you ready for the best news ever?

Ugh, please, I'm having a day,
what's up?

I just got out of a meeting
with the Headmaster

and Narla is officially gone,

- Charlie can go back to school.
- Yes!

Well, technically he's on probation.

We got a follow-up in a few weeks, so.

Still, yes. Thank God
our creepy shadow is gone.

- Right? We did good.
- We did, didn't we?

Yeah. In fact, I was thinking
maybe we could um, get together

and I don't know...

Hey, you know what, Nathan,
can I actually call you back,

I'm just walking into something?

- Oh sure.
- Great, bye.

- You ready to do this?
- Oh yeah.

- All right.
- Let's do it.

Come on out ladies,
take away our clinic,

you take away our tampons.

Take away our tampons
and get used to this.

Woo!

Take it in, fellas,

that's menstrual blood and
we're not going anywhere,

get used to it.

Put 'em up, guys!

All right, guys, let's do this.

- Who needs blood?
- Such a brilliant idea.

Oh hey, look alive!

Hi. Priya Rajvath, Source Toronto News.

Wow, this is intense,

can you tell us what's happening here?

Well, we have one week before
Elevation Realty shuts down

our women's clinic.

One week? And what happens then?

Then we have no home,

and a lot of women
are gonna really suffer.

- (Chanting and cheering)
- Save our clinic!

Let's go see, mommy! Come on.

Here we go, bud.

(Knocks on door)

Kate: She literally like
covered every tile in blood.

- Yeah.
- It was gore, I'm telling you.

Oh, Kate did you order
a pizza and two kids?

Hey. Nathan.

Hi.

Um, am I supposed to have the kids?

No, I just thought
maybe we could celebrate,

you know, cause uh... Narla.

Yeah, uh, sorry Nathan this is uh Mike,

- Mike this is Nathan.
- Hey, hi, how you doing?

- We work together.
- Good to meet you.

Uh, I just stopped by
to congratulate Kate

on the free bleed,
it was trending today.

Isn't that amazing?

Mike actually helped me
come up with the idea.

- Yeah.
- That's great,

- congrats to you both.
- Thank you.

I'll uh, call you tomorrow.

Oh no, no, no, you stay, I gotta run.

Really?

Yeah, I got a client waiting for me,

and I just wanted to
stop by and say good job.

- Okay.
- And, uh,

that's it, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.
- Yeah, you too.

- Yeah, take care.
- Yeah, you guys have fun,

uh, I'll just scoot by.

Come on, through.

- Sorry, I didn't know you had company.
- No, it's fine, come in. Hi guys.

Oh, my goodness.

- Pizza, lucky me.
- Pizza.