01x10 - 7 Swans A Singin'

[bunniefuu]

So do we know what's wrong?

No. Seems above our pay grade.

Does David seem distracted to you?

- What?
- Kristen, okay, what is going on?

Both of you seem someplace else.

No, I just...

Sometimes I wonder why I'm doing this.

Well, what would you do instead?

I don't know.

My husband suggested
I go climbing again.

Seriously? That I do not get.

At least here, you're
keeping David sane.

Their parents have been called.

I just want to get some sense
of the school's liability.

So, what is it?

How long have they been doing it?

- Two hours.
- Uninterrupted?

They stop when I tell them,
but then they start up again.

What's going on?

These are the two who work with David.

I thought it best they talk to them.

In here.

Emma, Olivia,

that's enough now, ladies.

Stop.

These folks are from the rectory

and they have some questions for you.

Hey. Hi.

What's that song you're singing?

- Ladies.
- I don't know.

Ladies, we need you to stop.

That's enough!

You don't know the words?

No.

- And why don't you stop?
- We do stop.

But then you just start back up again?

Why?

It feels good.

Can you stop right now?

Are you hearing the song in your heads?

- I do.
- Yeah.

Okay, can you do this for me?

Do you know the words to "Jingle Bells"?

Great.

Can you sing it for me?

♪ Jingle, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride. ♪

Okay, sorry, that's not it.

Um, it-it's like this.

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride ♪

♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪

♪ Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

- ♪ Jingle all the way. ♪
- Great.

Now, stop for a second.

Can you hear it in your head?

Perfect.

Sing it again.

Go ahead, sing it.

♪ Jingle, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way ♪

♪ What fun it is to ride ♪

♪ In a one-horse open sleigh. ♪

It's stuck song syndrome.

An auditory form of OCD.

- These girls have OCD?
- Not necessarily.

I mean, you should
talk to their parents.

Basically, the song is just stuck

like an earworm in their head.

What is the cure?

Well, the simplest
treatment is distraction.

I gave them gum.

Gum? Why gum?

Well, sometimes the
distraction of gum chewing

can keep the mind from
obsessing on the song.

And if it fails?

There's ERP... exposure
and response prevention".

It's about changing the response

when the song pops in their head.

But that is beyond what I can offer.

Kristen, was it?

It was.

Thank you.

It's good to have you involved in this.

Okay, there's a possession
we need to discuss.

We've been having some difficulties...

Teacher's pet.

Hey, hey, slamming? Really?

Hi.

Ha ha. Lexis?

Lexis?

What's going on? What's the problem?

Nothing.

Well, you're crying, so... something.

What?

A girl in school. She lives next door.

Who?

Sami.

She pushed me down
and she did this to me.

Oh...

Oh, baby.

Can I give you some
grandmotherly advice?

Uh-huh.

You take a brick and
you hit her in the face.

What?

This is where it hurts
the most, right here.

You take something heavy,
and you smack her.

Right there. She bigger than you?

Yeah. That's good. She won't expect it.

Okay, here.

Wrap your hand around this.

She'll think you're just
hitting her with your fist,

but you'll really have
the thrust of a rock.

What's her name again?

- Sami.
- Sami.

Sami's gonna bleed just a little bit,

but she'll think it's
just from your fist.

Then you just drop your arm
down by your side like this,

and let it slip out.

And people will never know
you had a rock in there at all.

I can't.

Oh, sure you can, sweetheart.

I thought I couldn't either.

You know what I found out?

You either make 'em your
bitch or they make you theirs.

In the name of the Father,

the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

It's been two weeks
since my last confession.

These are my sins.

I slept with a woman.

Someone I know from my past.

She's the sister of my fiancée.

Have you told your fiancée?

No.

She d*ed.

Some years ago.

Do you think a relationship
might be developing

with this other woman?

I...

She-she and I have talked about it.

But there are just too many...

complications.

We've agreed not to
see each other again.

Is there something else?

Yes. I...

I'm in my third year at...

Your third year at...

Nothing.

Okay.

Then I ask you to reflect
on the act of contrition.

Can I help you with something?

Hello?

♪ Hark, the herald angels sing ♪

♪ Glory to the new-born king. ♪

♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪

♪ Jingle all the way. ♪

What is that?

- What?
- That song.

- I don't know. It's stuck in my head.
- Yeah.

It's familiar.

I know, it's something
that these schoolgirls

kept singing today. They
said they couldn't stop.

It's "Pudsy's Christmas".

- What?
- It's "Pudsy's Christmas".

What?

What's "Putty Christmas"?

A cartoon online.

- How do you know it?
- I don't. I just know the song.

- Oh.
- How do I find it?

There's this thing
called the Internet, Mom.

_

♪ Santa got high,
now everything is funny ♪

♪ Someone had a gummy ♪

♪ He thought he might try ♪

♪ His mouth is so dry ♪

♪ His teeth are kind of itchy ♪

♪ How'd he ever get so high? ♪

♪ Ho, ho, ho, just a taste
of a yummy gummy ♪

♪ Ho, ho, ho ♪

♪ Yummy, yum in my rummy tummy ♪

♪ Oh, ho, ho ♪

♪ Gum, gum, tummy, funny gummy ♪

♪ Oh, God, everybody knows ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la. ♪

It's from an Internet video called

"Pudsy's Christmas".
It's an edgier version

of Charlie Brown's Christmas.

It's just a meme.
It'll be gone in a week.

And you think it's harmless?

I do.

- ♪ All is calm ♪
- Then explain this.

- ♪ All is bright ♪
- ♪ La, la, la, la ♪

- ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪
- ♪ Round yon... ♪

- ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪
- Quiet. Stop!

- Shh!
- ♪ La, la, la, la ♪

- ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪
- Stop.

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la. ♪

How is this possible?
It starts with four girls,

then it spreads to 50? Is it contagious?

I don't know. I mean, it
could be a psychogenic illness.

- What's that?
- Mass hysteria.

Illness-like behavior
that quickly spreads

- to a whole group.
- Even behavior like singing?

Uh, in 1962, there was a
laughter epidemic in Tanzania.

Three students at a boarding school

started laughing uncontrollably,

and then 159 others seemed to catch it.

And the school couldn't
control it. In fact,

the more that they
tried, the worse it got.

It spread to three villages in the area.

Why?

There were a lot of theories.

Emotions are contagious,

so many believe it to be an
extreme emotional contagion.

What stops it?

Nothing.

I mean, nothing in Western medicine.

It usually just dies out on
its own after a few months.

And it's harmless?

Well, there was a
dancing plague in 1518.

400 people in France
could not stop dancing.

In fact, many of them d*ed of
starvation and heart att*cks

because they couldn't stop.

Sorry, just...

Half of the things you
talk about sound made up.

Are we thinking there could be

- a supernatural dimension to this?
- Maybe,

but first, we should
consider the psychological.

- And the physical.
- What's the physical here?

- Well, it could be asbestos.
- I doubt that.

- Why?
- Because the school's been checked.

Never hurts to check again.

Listen, I've worked in a
lot of these older buildings,

and I'll tell you, there
is always some asbestos

- hiding in the soundproofing.
- _

I'd rather focus on the psychological.

No computer, no TV.

For a month?

Okay. I guess.

I mean, yeah.

God, I hate this.

I know.

What?

Parenting.

- I'll go get her.
- Yeah.

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la... ♪

What?

That song.

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la... ♪

Why are you singing that?

What?

"Pudsy's Christmas".
Why are you singing it?

- Lynn taught it to us. It's fun.
- Yeah.

- Don't you like it?
- Okay.

- I need you guys to stop singing it.
- Why?

It's a Christmas song.

I don't like it. Okay?
Just sing something else.

Here. Uh...

♪ Away in a manger, no crib for a bed ♪

♪ The little Lord Jesus ♪

♪ Lay down his sweet head... ♪

That's beautiful, Mom.

Lexis,

can we see you for a sec?

Good luck.

Okay. Why did you hit her?

She was bullying me. She pushed me down.

But you don't hit, Lexis.

You never do.

That's not what Grandma said.

What?

Grandma said the only way
for her to stop bullying me

is if I hit her back.

Grandma said that?

And it worked.

Sami said sorry and the other girls

wanted to be my friend again.

Yeah, but we don't hit.

Okay? Kristen?

Mom, you can't do that.

Hmm? I'm sorry, what?

Sami almost went to the hospital.

Okay, I-I'm confused. Who's Sami?

The girl Lexis hit.

The girl you told Lexis to hit.

Kristen, I'm sorry,

But I have no idea
what you're talking about.

You didn't tell Lexis to hit Sami?

No!

Of course not.

Oh, my God.

Look, I-I don't want
to get Lexis in trouble,

but I didn't tell her to hit anyone.

Are you telling me Lexis is lying?

No. No, I'm not. I just...
I didn't say anything.

So...

Ben,

go ahead and check for asbestos.

Hey, let me call you back.

Let's talk.

So I thought we were trying
to stay away from each other.

I thought so, too.

So didn't you call me?

What is this?

Note you left on my pillow.

What?

Like a high school crush?

No. No, I did not leave
this on your pillow.

It's not even my handwriting.

I know.

So why call me?

Because you know whose
handwriting it is.

Julia's.

Oh, my God.

You think I would save
one of Julia's notes

to put on your pillow?

- How else would it get there?
- Okay.

You know why I really think you called?

Because you're not over this.

Because you said we should stay apart,

but you're the one who called me.

- Renee.
- What is the other option here?

You thought I was teasing you
with my sister's handwriting?

How does that even make sense?

Okay. I should just go.

David.

David, some people are not
meant for the priesthood.

Take care.

What is this?

The food served here.

Okay, you were right.
There's no asbestos issue.

But the vendor who supplies
your vegetables, DFC Veggies,

they have some pesticide issues.

They are fighting off lawsuits.

And I found traces of

anhydrous ammonia on the produce.

It's a pesticide.

It's one of the reasons that
their produce is so cheap.

You think the girls were
affected by the pesticides?

Yes.

What do you need?

Well, we need to question the
girls who were affected again.

Okay. Give me a minute.

My girls aren't at this school,

yet they're humming the song, too.

- Why is that?
- I don't know.

Why do people sing "It's a Small World"

months after they've
gone through the ride?

It's simple, it's repetitive.

Stop! Stop!

Stop! Stop!

- Stop! Stop!
- Stop!

Stop it!

You told me to hit Sami.

- Prove it.
- What?

Prove that I told you to do that.

But you did.

Mm, I think you're mistaking
me with someone else.

Why are you doing this? You're lying.

Lexi. Lexi, sweetheart.

Listen to me.

There's snitching and there's lying.

And snitching is far worse.

Okay, I'm gonna tell you something

that you're gonna find
out when you're an adult.

And it's probably the
best Christmas present

I could ever give you.

You ready?

Everybody lies.

Yeah, I lie.

But so does your mom and your
dad and all your teachers.

So next time,

tell them whatever it takes to
keep you and me out of trouble.

And here's the most important thing:

you never, ever, ever snitch.

You got it?

I love you.

Oh, I love you so much.

Ooh. I got to get this.

Hi. What's going on?

Just finishing up with a patient here.

I wanted to know whether
I could see you tonight.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm just finishing up
with my babysitting duties.

An hour?

Sounds good.

Oh, how did the talk
with the granddaughter go?

Good. Good. Thanks for the advice.

No problem. Just giving back. Love you.

Love you, too.

Hi.

Can you hear me, Emma?

Yeah.

Why did you put scissors in your ear?

The noise.

It just kept getting worse.

Have you ever heard of anything
called "Pudsy's Christmas"?

No.

The school's given us
permission to check

your browser history.
Are you okay with that?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, it's in my bag.

What about school lunches?

Have you been eating
a lot of the salads?

No.

No?

What do you eat at the cafeteria?

French fries.

That's all you eat, French fries?

- Yeah.
- Everything else is gross.

Okay.

We really need your help

getting to the bottom of this.

Emma, what is Malindaz?

"Malindaz"?

Influencer, talks about
clothes and makeup and stuff.

Is that where you heard the music?

I don't know.

I don't know.

Hey, guys! Today's video
is especially for you.

Hey, guys! Today's video
is especially for you.

I'm calling it "Malindaz Challenge".

- This can't be the reason, can it?
- Hmm.

It's an amazing 95 minutes long.

And anybody who watches the whole thing

and says "Malindaz Challenge"
three times at the end

will go crazy!

No joke, girl, completely insane.

So don't do it!

Only three people have ever done it,

and they ended up in Bellevue.

So stop at the two mark...

♪ And don't you dare say ♪

♪ "Malindaz Challenge" ♪

... three times.

You have been warned.

She's trying to make
the site sound dangerous.

The less their parents would approve,

the more kids will want to watch it.

Listen. Background music.

- The shade that might be best for you...
- There it is.

That's it.

That's where they heard it.

If you've got, like, freckles,

you want to kind of use it sparingly.

Okay, all right.

I will make the sacrifice
and watch the whole thing.

Well, this is no time for bravery.

- I'm gonna let you.
- Thank you.

Come look for me in Bellevue.

But, first...

Oh, what is this?

... presents!

Are we supposed to open them right now?

You can open them after I leave.

Merry Christmas, both of you.

Merry Christmas.

We should've gotten her something.

Okay, let's do this!

So first, foundation.

Ooh, this is a shade

that might be best for you.

It's a bit glowy, so if
you've got, like, freckles,

you want to kind of use it sparingly.

'Cause you know what I always say!

Use what you naturally have.

Whatever distinguishes you.

And maybe for you, that's freckles,

so make sure we can see them.

I'm not in love with the texture
of this brand as it goes on,

but I am all about some of their colors,

especially when I use it
with my usual foundation.

And that's liquid foundation, right?

Never Stick... check it out.

You know me; I can sometimes be

all about my neutral look.

_

And you can go for something
more dramatic, of course,

but remember...

♪ You'll stand out! ♪

Heavier coverage concealer can
be your best of best friends

when you've been out till dawn.

I know you know what I'm talking about.

Don't overdo it.

One dot is all it takes.

A good concealer can
literally cover all your sins.

♪ Good King Wenceslas looked down ♪

♪ On the feast of Stephen ♪

♪ I don't know the rest of the words ♪

- Yes, you do.
- ♪ La, la, la, la... ♪

- Lynn. Lynn.
- Yeah, Mom?

Do you ever visit makeup
sites? Makeup and clothes?

- You said I was too young.
- I know, I know.

But have you ever heard
of the site called, um...

Called what?

Nothing, sweetheart.

Never mind.

- Okay.
- Good night.

Good night.

... a little too much.

No, actually...

I kind of like it. What do you think?

What are we hiding?

Nothing, just something from work.

p*rn?

Oh, seriously?

Yeah.

If you listen to it
all the way to the end,

it's supposed to make you crazy.

Yeah, I can believe that.

Then you're supposed to say

"Malindaz Challenge" three times.

I actually think it really works...

Your work is insane.

My favorite new late-night
club in Williamsburg.

Have you checked it out yet, seriously?

Anything dangerous?

Okay.

- Don't overdo it.
- No, nothing I can hear.

Hmm, that's weird.

What is that?

What?

Do you hear that?

Yeah.

A good concealer can
literally cover all your sins.

It's a man.

I don't like it. It's scary.

That's not Daddy's voice. Who is it?

That's the challenge!

You made it all the
way to the end with me.

You're definitely one
of the special ones.

Only one more step.

Are you sure you want to do it?

You know what to say, right?

Three times?

Okay, but remember...

You have been warned.

Malindaz Challenge.

Malindaz Challenge.

Malindaz Challenge.

This is insane.

Malindaz Challenge.

Malindaz Challenge. Malindaz Challenge.

But remember...

You have been warned.

Malindaz Challenge. Malindaz Challenge.

Malindaz... Challenge.

Yes, I am an idiot.

_

_

_

_

What the hell are you doing, David?

What?

These pictures of you and me.

You're Wi-Poking them?

What, are you following me?

It's not me.

You're not doing this?

No!

David...

what's happening?

I don't know.

We need to talk.

I agree.

Mom!

Mom! Mom!

Stop, Lila, stop! Mom!

- It's in her ear! I don't know what to do!
- Oh, my God!

- What happened? What's going on?!
- Oh, my God!

- I don't know.
- The voice is in my head!

- Oh, Mommy!
- It's okay. It's okay.

I'm sorry.

Is she all right?

Kristen?

Lila, um...

Yeah, she's-she's all right.

Doctor thinks her eardrum will recover.

What I don't understand
is how this happened.

Did your daughters hear anything

- in that Malindaz Challenge video?
- Yes.

They said they heard a voice

coming from my room while
I was watching the video.

I listened to all 95 minutes
of that stupid video,

and there was no voice.

Yes, there was.

Listen to this.

You guys hear anything?

- No.
- Good.

Because that is at 17,000 hertz range,

which is the range that only
people under 16 can hear.

Are you kidding?

Those are sounds that
only teenagers can hear?

Yep. Science is weird.

Now, this is what
they're really hearing.

Across for attention, down for results.

Across for attention, down...

- What the heck?
- That is a voice

that is encouraging kids
on how to commit su1c1de.

Oh, my God.

That is a su1c1de instruction meme

that only teenagers can hear.

Why?

Because some people
like to do bad things.

They're clout chasing.

- Clout?
- Yeah.

Getting attention on the Internet.

Sometimes it comes from
being a good influence,

sometimes it comes from
being a bad influence.

Is Malindaz the one doing this?

No, not necessarily.

Can you find out?

Yeah. Doing my best.

Oh, um, Kristen,

uh, I'm not sure there's
a right time to do this,

but, um, here.

It's from both of us.

Aw. You didn't have to.

I know. We'll take it back.

No!

Uh, look, can you, uh,

open that when we're not here?

Because it's too much mush.

- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.

David, thank you.

Are you okay?

I am.

Ben thought you... seemed a bit sad.

I've got some things to
figure out about my life.

But... I'm okay.

Good.

I'm okay, too.

Good.

- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.

- They merged together.
- The cats were...

- Yes.
- They merged a brother and a sister together?

- No.
- What, like in a test tube?

- No, they...
- This sounds weird to me.

- They were in their mother's stomach.
- Hey.

- Hey.
- Hi.

You okay?

- Better. That was weird.
- Yeah?

- What did you hear?
- Same song, playing over and over.

And there was this voice

asking if I wanted to
be part of the army.

- What army?
- I don't know.

Just someone who's
strong and could fight.

- Fight who?
- Other people.

I don't want to think about that.

Let's see your thumb, please.

One, two, three, four,

I declare a thumb w*r.

- I won.
- No!

And then you strike.

No, you can't bring this in yet.

I can. I'm allowed.

No.

♪ Does she wake up, put on makeup ♪

♪ In the bathroom ♪

♪ And go to work and stay real late ♪

♪ And text you she'll be back soon? ♪

♪ But her boss runs his
fingers round her pretty ♪

♪ Blonde platinum do ♪

♪ I bet you never thought
about that, did you? ♪

♪ And it's none of my business ♪

♪ And I don't wanna get involved ♪

- ♪ If you're thinking that she's good... ♪
- Yeah?

Across for attention, down for results.

Across for attention, down for...

Look, I'm just an influencer.

I didn't produce it. I didn't do that.

Yeah, so who produced it?

Someone who was given to me.

Some guy named... Mike.

You know this is going to ruin you.

You're encouraging
kids to k*ll themselves.

No, I'm just showing them makeup.

Not my daughter.

My daughter almost
destroyed her eardrum.

Yeah, because there's a tone in there,

along with the voice...
it's annoying as hell.

Honestly, if you listen
to that thing long enough,

- you'd want to poke out your own eardrums.
- But that wasn't me.

- Mm. It was Mike.
- I just want girls

to have more power through their looks.

I like your earrings.

Yeah, thank you.

We need you to take down that video.

Because our next stop is to the police.

Girls are hurting themselves.

It's just so horrible.

I don't know what to do,
but they're threatening me.

Did you tell them that a
producer did it and not you?

Yeah. I said Mike did it,

but they're forcing me
to shut down my site.

Even if they could force
you to take it down,

you'd have it back up in two months

under a different name.

But they'll embarrass me.

They'll say that I was
using that track you gave me

to make people crazy.

That track I gave you?

Are you threatening me?

What? No.

Sounded like you were
preparing a defense.

No, I was just saying...

Because when you first came to me,

how many followers did you have?

- I don't know.
- 2,000.

You were a micro-influencer.

And now how many do
you have? Two million.

Let's not lose track of that.

- I won't.
- Good.

Now, here's what you're going to do.

Take down the site and apologize.

What? But that's what they want.

And that's what they'll get.

In 1785, the king of France found

that potatoes were
the most economical way

to feed the peasantry.

The problem was peasants hated potatoes.

So the king has his servants
build a big brick wall,

and behind it he plants
potatoes in his secret garden.

The peasants grow
curious and then upset.

They climb over the wall and steal

all the food planted there.

And that's how potatoes became a staple

of the French peasantry.

What does that mean?

The forbidden is always desirable.

I'm just so sorry, guys.

I want you to know I'm better than this.

One of my producers
uploaded my challenge online

and added something.

Something that can make it dangerous.

I don't want any trouble
with the police or anything,

so I'm gonna take it down
by the end of the day.

But please, please, please
don't share this video.

Oh, come on.

Don't download it. Don't share it.

Oh, this video is gonna be everywhere

- by this time tomorrow.
- Just like she wants.

I will not abandon you ever.

For you.

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

It's been four days
since my last confession.

- Four days?
- Yes.

You know, you don't need
to come every day, son.

I know.

It's been four days
since my last confession,

but I didn't tell you everything.

Okay.

I confessed that I slept with a woman...

but there's something else.

I'm in my third year of seminary.

And I'm training to be a priest.

I don't want to hide anything anymore.

I'm sorry.

Anything else?

No.

Will you avoid any situation

that might lead you to temptation again?

Yes.

Good.

Then you are forgiven.

♪ Hark, the herald angels sing ♪

♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪

♪ Peace on Earth and mercy mild ♪

♪ God and sinner recon... ♪

No.

No, please.