04x11 - The Missionball Ball - Tell Me What Sphinx

[bunniefuu]

[wails]

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Go, go, Gadget, go ♪

♪ Go, go, Gadget, go ♪

♪ Go, go, Gadget, go ♪

♪ Go, go, get 'em, Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

♪ Go, go, Gadget, go ♪

♪ Go, go, get 'em, Gadget ♪

♪ Inspector Gadget ♪

- [upbeat music plays]
- [Talon chuckles] Whoa!

This sound system is almost
as amped as I am! What's that?

You want some
of my sweet scratchity-scratch action?

Well, if you insist.

- [record scratches]
- [Dr. Claw] Talon, stop touching that

or I'll get MADcat to give you
some sweet scratchity-scratch action.

[snarls]

That's right, put your hands in the air

and wave them like you're really,
really angry about something! [laughs]

Hey, does this button pump up the jams?

- [beeps]
- [Dr. Claw] No!

[Dr.Claw groans]
Talon! I told you not to touch it!

These beats are super freaky. [shrieks]

But not as freaky as that.

[MADcat whimpers]

[music stops]

[MADcat and Dr. Claw groan]

What you just witnessed
was caused by my latest w*apon

of mass obstruction, The Puppet Pulser!

So it's a w*apon
that forces people to dance? Lame!

I want you to infiltrate
HQ's annual Missionball Ball

and use the Puppet Pulser to make the
agents dance until their feet fall off.

So, what I'm hearing is
you want me to be a DJ!

Sweet! [gasps]
What's my perfect DJ name?

DJ Great Hair? DJ Spin Cycle? DJ Hard Abs?

You're DJ T'd-Off, now, get out.

[sighs]

[shrieks]

So, P, wanna spill
why you've been avoiding me

like an awkward friend request?

Don't say it's 'cause you
don't wanna go to the Missionball Ball.

OK, I won't.

Pen! The Missionball Ball
is only the biggest HQ event of the year

and you totes bail every time!
[blows a raspberry]

[sighs]
Look, I'm just not that into dancing, OK?

Oh, you're totally into dancing,
you're just terrible at it.

[audience laugh]
Like cray-cray te-te at it.

But big d, it's not like anyone
will be judging you and your moves.

- [door opens]
- [Gadget] Who's ready for all of HQ

to judge you and your moves?

With cold, judgey eyes, while you compete

for the Missionball Ball's
Golden Shoe Dance Prize?

- I know I am!
- [groans]

- [whimpers]
- [Inspector Gadget] Twitching? Squirming?

- Wriggling?
- [squeals]

Looks like Brain's got fleas again.

[sighs]

- Go, go, Gadget, dog delouser.
- [yaps]

[Chief Quimby giggles]

Uh, thanks for the giggles, Gadget, but...

But you're afraid MAD's next plan
is no laughing matter?

Sorry, K, we've got a real mission ball
to deal with. [chuckles]

- We believe MAD...
- [upbeat music plays]

...fun times are ahead
at the Missionball Ball!

The only mystery is who will win
this year's Golden Shoe Dance Prize.

Your mission: have a ball tonight.

This message will self-destruct
in excitement!

- [beeps]
- [groans]

This is my
most important mission yet, Chief!

Don't worry,
I'll make sure everyone has a ball tonight

- by being on security duty!
- [siren wails]

- [stammers] But.
- And I'll help!

Pen! The mission was to...

La la la, not listening.
Too busy keeping people safe!

Come on, Uncle Gadget.

Save a dance for me, Chief.

Whoa!

- [groans]
- You're on fire! For realsies!

Hashtag rolypolybossfire.

[Chief Quimby groans]

[disco music plays]

Nothing suspicious here.

I'll go check the somewhere else.

Check it out, P,
you're practically dancing already.

You can't go yet.

Junior Agent Not-you is right, Penny,

we can't leave until we've investigated
every non-HQ guest here.

Starting with that guy!

[man gasps, screams]

I'm sorry, my good man but I have to
verify your identity for the record.

- [groans]
- Loud clothes, bad facial hair,

sunglasses inside,
winter hat in the wrong season.

Wowzers, you're obviously...

[gasps]

...a DJ!

Cool bro.

- All clear! Let's check upstairs.
- Yes! Sorry, duty calls.

[howls]

[disc scratches]

- Yeah! [laughs]
- [microphone feedback]

♪ Welcome to the party
It's time to get starty ♪

♪ DJ T'd-Off on the mic
Tell me who is feeling psyched ♪

- [discs scratch]
- [mimics discs scratching]

[gasps]
No way, this is my jam!

[hums]

Bad Brain! Only people cut rugs.

Silly dogs like you just soil them.

[snarls]

[mimics discs scratching]

♪ It's the rhythm of the night
And it's time to rock it right ♪

♪ All the girls and all the boys
Wave your hands and make some noise ♪

[mimics discs scratching]

- [sings in a deep voice]
- [agent] Oh.

That DJ's a bigger thr*at
to good times than MAD.

Maybe he just needs some encouragement?

Play a good one!

We've searched HQ top to bottom
and there's no sign of MAD malfeasance.

But a good inspector knows
when to keep looking

and now is not one of those times.

- Back to the ball!
- What?

So soon? There's gotta be somewhere
we haven't looked.

Nope, we've checked everywhere.
Even the Chief's private septic system.

[shudders]

Besides, we need to get back in time
for the Golden Shoe. [gasps]

Of course!

If I were a fiend bent on sabotage,
that award would be the perfect target.

We have to make sure it's safe.

Go, go, Gadget, golden footwear protector!

[drill whirs]

Brain, you follow Uncle Gadget.

I'll, uh, keep patrolling?

- [Penny sniggers]
- [scoffs]

Yes! Another year, another
successful dodge of the ball. [exhales]

- [discs scratch]
- [mimics discs scratching]

- [beeps]
- [Dr. Claw] Talon!

Why is no one dancing?

Activate the Puppet Pulser

or are you too incompetent
to press a big red button?

[groans]

♪ DJ T'd-Off rock this place
You can't keep up with the pace ♪

♪ Hit the dance floor round the room
Shake your booty 'cause you're doomed ♪

[mimics discs scratching]

[mimics clucking, chortles]

[pulsing]

[yelps, grumbles]

[gasps]
Your beats are still totally basic!

But I can't stop dancing.

♪ DJ T'd-Off energize
You'll dance until your own demise ♪

- [laughs]
- [crash]

- What the...?
- [barks]

- [yelps]
- [Gadget] Good thinking, Brain!

The best way to make sure the Golden Shoe
is safe, is to win it ourselves.

Loosen up.
It's the secret to the perfect dip.

- [spine cracks]
- [whimpers]

[cats meowing]

[sighs]
This is so much better than dancing.

But maybe I should check on the ball.

[beep]

Looks like the best Mission Ball ever.

Wait a sec.

Why does everyone look
as thrilled to be dancing as I'd be?

And why does that DJ look so familiar?

Talon! I should have known.

[gasps]
The music's forcing them to dance!

You mean there was a MAD plot tonight?
[chuckles]

I can't wait to see
the look on Kayla's face when she...

- Oh, right.
- [beeps]

Time to turn the tables
on Talon's turntables.

- [hip-hop music]
- What! What! What!

Wowzers,
these guys are serious competitors.

We'll have to up our game
if we're going to win.

Go, go, Gadget, in it to win it!

[yelps, crashes]

Nice form, Brain, but I think
your landing will cost us points.

[Brain groans]

OK, Talon, let's dance.

[gasps]
Pen, I'm so glad you made it!

Even if your moves are as weak as my legs.

You go, girl! [groans]

Yeesh, Pen,
you're supposed to bust a move,

not move like you're busted!

Sorry, can't hear you,
my fists are too loud!

[gasps] How are you immune
to the Puppet Pulser?

- [screams]
- [disc scratches]

Uh-oh. [whimpers]

I give you ten minutes before you collapse
from those ugmo moves.

[stammers] No! Not like this!
[groans]

[chuckles] It's like watching a car crash,
it makes me laugh.

- [Talon laughs]
- [Penny groans]

Can't stop popping and locking. [whimpers]

- Whoa.
- Nice moves, Penny.

With everyone else keeling over,
blacking out and collapsing around us.

It looks like you're my main competition
for the Golden Shoe Dance Prize.

No, Uncle Gadget, we're running
out of time. We've gotta fight.

Fight? That's it!

- I challenge you to a dance battle.
- I accept!

But I should warn you,
when it comes to these battles,

I'm the w*rlord of the dance!

Go, go, Gadget, dances of the world.

The North Guatamazil Cha-Cha.

[grunts]

The Toronto Two-Step.

[shrieks] No!

And my big finish, The Metro City Mambo!

No, [screams] no!

[groans]

[shrieks]
Looks like it's time for the last dance,

The Running Man!

Congratulations, Gadget.

You cut the rug out from under MAD,
and won the Golden Shoe doing it.

Thanks, Chief.

But I couldn't have done it
without my amazing dance partner.

[gasps]

The music.

[grumbles]

Speaking of music,
you can stop dancing now, P.

- For reals.
- You know, I would.

But there's a dance party alert!

[disco music plays]

[Dr. Claw] You failed me again, Talon!

And I believe the punishment
should fit the crime.

Now, dance!

- [yells]
- Dance, dance, Gadget.

[Dr. Claw] Dance, dance.

[Dr. Claw] Talon! I've discovered
the most evil super w*apon ever!

Is it MADcat when she's got gas?

No! But cat toots aren't a bad idea.

[gasps] The w*apon I'm talking about
is The Great Sphinx of Giza.

The ancient Egyptian monument

is rumored to have the power
to turn people to stone.

Once we figure out how to activate it,
we can...

Turn Penny, uh, I mean,
turn Gadget to stone?

Yes! Go to Egypt and activate the Sphinx!

In the meantime, I'm going to experiment
with this cat gas w*apon.

MADcat,
you've got a lot of bean eating to do.

[meows]

"I'm in a round box with no lid,
inside a golden treasure's hid.

What am I?"

[scoffs] Aside from the easiest riddle
ever? An egg.

Actually, Penny,
the answer's Chief Quimby.

He's round, has no lid
and has a heart of gold.

Don't feel bad.

Not everyone
can be a riddle master like me.

[Chief Quimby]
Psst, Gadget! Can you see me?

Another riddle? I know where the Chief is.

He's hiding in Brain's stomach.

Go, go, doggy surgical kit.

[whirs]

- [screams]
- [Chief] Gadget! Stop!

That's not the Brain you need to search.

[both sigh]

MAD's been spotted in Egypt.

We believe they're trying to harness
the petrifying power of the Sphinx

If they succeed,

MAD will be able to turn everyone
in the entire world to stone.

Your mission: solve the puzzle
of how to stop MAD.

This message will self-destruct.

You picked the perfect agent
for the job, Chief.

Now, why don't you solve
this circular puzzle

while I use circular logic to stop MAD!

- [b*mb ticks]
- [whimpers]

[groans]

Here we are, g*ng, Giza.

The city pointy geometry lovers
can't get enough of.

[Penny] Uncle Gadget, wait!

You're right, Penny, what kind of hero
would I be if I left the dog in the car?

- Come on, Brain!
- [whimpers, yelps]

[grunts]

[crashes]

[Inspector Gadget] No time to play in
the sand, Brain, we have riddles to solve!

- [gasps]
- [car beeps]

OK, Sphinxy, what you got for me?

"To wake me, solve this riddle."

Groan, riddles are for total dweebs!

And speaking of dweebs.

There it is! And look, a riddle!

"To wake me, solve this riddle:
I can't walk but I run.

Where I go, thought follows close behind.
What am I?"

Ha! I knows, it's a nose!
See what I did there?

A nose is too on the nose, Penny.

The answer is clearly
a robot designed to run

while being chased by floating brains.

Riddle solved.

Go, go, Gadget, triumphant fist pump.

Who dares seek my power?

[gasp]

Me! Dibs on ancient evil power!

Talon? You don't need the Sphinx's power,
you're already a rockhead.

Silence!

[squawks]

No mortal can control the awesome power
of the Learned Lord of Limestone,

without proving their worth
in a game of riddles!

Three real answers lie in far-off lands.

If you want my powers in your hands,

these answers you must bring to me.

But if you fail, stone you shall be.

[Talon and Penny scream]

So, you're a master riddler, eh?
You don't seem very riddly to me.

You doubt my power?

[laughs]

Then prepare for a battle of wits.

If you lose, you shall be turned to stone.

Well, I've never met a rock, pebble,
stone or boulder that could outwit me.

You're on, Mr. Sphinx.

- ["Rule, Britannia!" playing]
- [car honks]

[groans]

What would the Sphinx want in London?

- [stone bird tweets]
- [Sphinx] Here is your first riddle.

It wants us to wait for it to tell us
our first riddle. I'm a genius.

I have a ring, but no fingers.
What am I?

So, tell me your lame guess
and I'll tell you how far off you are.

Well, it could be a...
Hey, I'm not gonna fall for that.

Whatevs, I'll just get Uncle Claw...

Hey! Phoning a friend's cheating!

Wait! What has a ring but has no fingers?

- It's a...
- It's a phone!

[both] I said it first!

[groans]

It's not over yet!

I have to confiscate that phone
for official saving the world business.

Thank you. The answer's a phone!

You gonna give that back, love?

I am The Wondrous Whetstone of Wit.

Here's your first puzzle,
can you solve it?

What is black and white and read all over?

[whimpers]

What's black and white?

An old TV! What else?

Zebras. Zebras have four legs.

What would you see on TV
that has a bunch of legs?

A soccer game.

Where the ball is also black and white.

Aha! The answer is a soccer ball

- smothered in strawberry jam.
- [groans]

Seriously? It's a newspaper!

And evidently, a soccer ball
smothered in strawberry jam too.

[groans] Fine.

Next riddle!

[screams]

[Sphinx] Without fingers, I point,

without arms, I strike,
without feet, I run.

What am I?

[groans]
This is so lame. Later, loser!

Hey, where are you going? [groans]

At least MAD
won't get the Sphinx's power now.

Talon is too dense to figure it out.

Dense?
Then how do I already know the answer?

Sneak up on Penny and steal her answer!

Genius.

Without fingers, I point, without arms,
I strike, without feet, I run.

[whimpers]
I need more time.

Time! Of course! It's a clock!

[chuckles]

Quit stealing my answers.

Quit talking to yourself so loud.

Another clock! [chuckles]
Two for one! [screams]

[groans]
Your answers aren't right,

they're just not technically wrong!

But I have one more riddle
that's sure to be your last.

[chuckles]

What goes around the world
and stays in a corner?

What travels around the world?

The International Space Station.

And what's always in a corner at the ISS?

Oh! It's that decorative fern.

- Wrong! [laughs manically]
- [whimpers]

Wrong?
Then I'll just have to prove it to you.

Brain, stay with Mr. Sphinx.

[groans]

[stone bird tweets]

[Sphinx] Your final riddle.

A poor man has me, a rich man needs me,
you'll expire if you eat me.

What am I?

Whatever it is,
I'm keeping it to myself this time.

Come on, Pen.

- [groans]
- Sharing is caring.

Don't sh**t!

The answer's a handful of moist,
stinky garbage.

Thanks, Pen, handfuls of moist,
stinky garbage coming up.

Ew, gross! But, ha, worth it.

Having the power to turn you to stone
is gonna rock. Ha!

Get it?

I see you have finally returned.

Tell me, what answers have you learned?

Please, I could've figured out
these riddles in my sleep.

A phone, a clock and a handful of garbage.

True, true and false.

What? But Penny said... [screams]

[chuckles]

And you, girl? Tell me.

Are you ready to challenge
The Riddle King?

What clever answers do you bring?

Um, a phone, a clock,
but for that last one?

I've got nothing.

Correct!

A poor man has me, a rich man needs me,
you'll expire if you eat me...

The answer is "nothing"!

It is? I mean, of course it is!

But you were totally guessing.

Humanity is no smarter than stone.

I will turn them all to pebble and...

- [Inspector Gadget] Wowzers!
- [screams] No!

Not him again!

See? It's that decorative fern!

[eagle squawks]

Now, here's a riddle for you.

An animal crawls on four legs, has teeth
in its nose, and makes cheese soup.

Also, it's afraid of cucumbers,
and can count to eight, but not seven.

Five of it's three feet are sausages.

What am I?

[whimpers, chuckles]
I don't know!

It's easy! The answer is,
the imaginary animal in this riddle.

What? I've never heard
such a terrible riddle in my life.

Oh, [stammers]
I can't go on like this! [screams]

The only part of me that's still rock hard
are my abs.

Later, Pen!

Congratulations, Gadget.

You've solved the riddle of the Sphinx
and this case.

It was a snap, Chief.

- [rock crumbles]
- [scream]

[groans]

[Dr. Claw] Here's a riddle.
What did the failure nephew say

to the chamber
full of cat flatulence, hmm?

I dunno, what?

- [fart noise]
- [yells] My nostrils are burning!

[Talon groans]

[Dr. Claw coughs] MADcat, wow.