04x10 - Moving On

Episode transcripts for the 2016 TV show "Baskets". Aired January 2016 - August 2019.*
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"Baskets" follows Chip Baskets, who full of hopes and dreams, sets out to become a professional clown. After failing to get a degree at a prestigious clowning school in Paris, he is stuck with a job at a local rodeo.
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04x10 - Moving On

Post by bunniefuu »

You have reached
the voice-mail box of...

- Chip from Baskets.
- At the tone,

please record your voice message.

Hey, Chip. It's Martha.

Um, I've called a few times and,
uh, didn't leave a message.

Um, are you mad at me?

I'm not sure
what happened, but, um...

but I apologize
if I did anything.

Um, I heard that
the rodeo's shutting down,

and so maybe
you just need some space,

um, or maybe you need
to talk to somebody,

and if that's, uh, the case,
uh, just give me a jangle.

Um...

Oh.

Did I tell you
the cats really missed you?

'Cause Ronald Reagan,

I found him sleeping
in your undies drawer.

Oh.

Ah, I'm just glad that
the carpet emergency is over.

I am, too, honey,
and you did really good.

I'm really proud of you,
but I really missed you.

Thanks.

- We sure about this move, baby?
- Oh, honey, yeah.

You know,
I never really liked this place.

Well, I will call the broker
and see if I can list it.

Oh, please do, and find out
what kind of b*at we're gonna take

on that damn equity thing.

Who wants what? Oh, God.

Hey, Martha.

Hey, Mrs. Baskets.
Have you heard from Chip?

No. You know, honey,
he's a brooder.

You got to give him time.
He'll come around.

Are you sure he's not upset
about losing the rodeo?

We're all upset, honey.

It worked out the way it did,
and you have to live with it.

He'll come around.

But I've got some exciting news:
Ken and I are moving to Denver.

Wow. This is a lot
of info to process.

Well, you're telling me.
I'm a California girl

going to a cold climate and
I don't even have a winter coat.

Oh. Hi, Susan.

Susan's here. You know,
that catreminds me of you, Martha.

Hey, Martha,
where could I get a good coat?

Um, I think
Burlington Coat Factory

is known for their coats.

Oh, that's so perfect.

Martha, I'm gonna miss you
and all the kids.

But I guess you have
your own lives now,

but I hope we stay in touch.

Well, do you want to, like,
exchange addresses

and be pen pals or something?

No, honey,
there's no writing letters.

Take a flight.

Get one of those
cheapie airline flights

like on Southwest or Spirit.

- Um, yeah, I don't really like South...
- I love you, Martha.

Hang in there.
Chip will come around.

Bye, honey.

Uhp, she hung up.

Hi.

Chip, I heard about the rodeo
and your mom moving away.

It sounds like a lot.

I think maybe you're annoyed
with me 'cause I asked

if you were mad at me,
but I brought you something.

It's kind of an olive branch.

Hello. Can I help you?

Hang on, Chip.
I've got a situation.

Hi.

Were you here
to see the place, or...?

Kind of.

Wow, he decorated.

Oh, the-the apartment's forsale,
so the furniture is fake.

- But...
- Well, it looks real.

- Wait, he moved out?
- Yeah, I know, right?

He's never gonna walk
to the b*llet train station.

Well, did he leave aforwarding
address or anything?

I believe he did.
I can look it up.

Okay.

Um, do you want a hat rack?

That's okay.

I'll look the address up.

There's nothing like
it, is there?

I mean, it's so peaceful.

And we're growing everything
for ourselves.

Oh, and look, that's a loquat.

Looks like a large kumquat.

Yeah, but it's a loquat.

What do they taste like?

Like, um, a kiwi.

Or kind of like kumquat.

Sorry to bother you.

Oh, it's no bother at all.

I was just out backpicking
these fabulous tomatoes.

You really ought to try one.
They are incredible.

No, thanks, Tammy.

Um, I'm looking for Chip.

Really?

And why is that?

Um, a lot of reasons.

I don't know exactly, um...

I think I do.

You're worried about him
and you care about him.

Is he here?

I'm not at liberty to say.

But I can tell you
that he's finally serious

about working on himself.

Well, I really want
to speak to him.

Did he contact you?

No.

Martha, have you considered
that you might be

over identified with Chip

and that you're
sublimating your own issues

by coming out here to save him?

He really needs
to go through this on his own,

and it's best
that you leave him alone.

Dear...

go home.

Dale? Dale?

Dale, is that you...

Sorry.

Excuse me, sir.

Sir, do you know Dale?

You IRS?

No, sir, I'm just looking
for Dale Baskets.

I thought I smelled
a nice perfume

wafting through the RV park.

What is that, Lady Old Spice?

Dale, something serious
is going on.

Martha, is this
a ploy of some sort?

Do you still have
feelings for me?

Not now.

- Can we talk?
- Okay.

Well, it sounds like
she's brainwashing him.

Well, not exactly.

I mean,
it's supposed to help him.

She's helped a lot of people.

You just give her
a few thousand dollars

and move into her compound,
and then...

Uh, you give her
a few thousand dollars

and move into her compound?

- Just a few, huh?
- He's in a cult, Martha.

He's in a cult.

He may be one of 100 husbands
to this woman right now.

That's right. Or even
if he's the fifth husband,

- I have a problem with that.
- Oh, my God.

This is crazy.
What are we gonna do about Chip?

- We can lure him out.
- Wait, how will we do that?

Sugar cubes.

For Chip?

Sugar activates theopiate
receptors in your brain.

People can't resist it.

That's why women eat so much
chocolate on their periods.

Anything he likes, what do you
know that he is very fond of?

Okay. I think I know
what he likes.

♪ You know me ♪

♪ Oh, you know me ♪

♪ You know me ♪

♪ Too well ♪

♪ But if all those petty fears ♪

♪ Make every woman blind ♪

♪ Every woman ♪

♪ Blind. ♪

Hey, Penelope. Sounds good.

Martha.

- I love your style.
- Oh, thanks, Penelope.

- You don't want any tea?
- Oh, no, thanks.

I stopped at Starbucks four
times on the way down here,

so I'm kind of jacked.

Okay.

Um, I can't believe
Chip is in a cult.

- Yeah.
- It doesn't sound like him at all.

And I wonder if it's not just
a performance or something,

like, a clowning, you know?

Um, I don't know.

Uh, the last I heard,
he gave up "clooning."

Oh.

Well, so, what can I do?

Chip.

Penelope,
what are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

How are you?
I tried calling.

Oh, I threw out my cell phone.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

Nice. Are you a farmer now?

I mean, what are you doing?

Well, I'm just, you know,
I'm just trying to...

refocus my brain, in a way.

Um, I... I'm medit... I know it
sounds ridiculous coming from me.

- No, no.
- But I'm med... I'm meditating,

and, yeah, it's silly,
but it seems to... I like it.

I do.

What happened to your clowning?

You always said I was
a bad clown. Is that a bee?

No.

- Did I miss it?
- Look.

You're funny. You're a clown,
whatever you do.

Penelope.

Penelope, Chip is healing here.

I think it's time for you to go.

Oh, really?

Um, yes, I just wanted
to show him something

that I bought for him.

Okay.

You want to... I'll show you.

Okay, sure, sure, yeah.

It's a beautiful place here.

- Yeah, she's had it for a, for a while.
- Oh.

- I'm sorry, Chip.
- What is this?

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

What's going on?!
Let go of me!

- I'm so sorry, so sorry.
- Penelope, what's going on?!

Martha, is that you?!
Martha!

- Dale, I can smell your cologne!
- Shut up, sissy!

Oh, stray b*llet!

- Martha!
- In the van! Get in the van!

- M-Martha's on the ground!
- She's fine.

- Go, guys!
- Martha. -

Go, go, go!

Oh. Are you okay?

Martha.

- What happened?
- Hi, Mrs. Baskets.

I brought you some flowers.
They say it cheers people up.

I don't like 'em myself, but...

Well, thanks.

Hey, um, I'm really sorry
about Chip.

What about Chip?

Well, all the stuff with Tammy.

Tammy? W-What?

Um, I introduced Chip
to my life coach.

You know, like, haven't you
noticed a difference in me?

Well, I thought
it would help Chip, too.

I introduced them, and then
he just took it a lot farther

than I thought he would
and moved up there

and paid her a bunch of money
to pick vegetables

and he sold his condo.

Oh.

I got to sit down.

Oh.

Sold the condo?

That kid.

- Hey, mama.
- Hey, honey.

- How is he?
- Well, I had to lock his ass up.

He's a danger to himself
and society.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Chip?

Chip?

Oh, Lord, Lord, Lord.

Mom, finally you're here.

Listen, I-I'm not in a cult.

I-I-I don't need this. Okay?

And-and how's Martha,
by the way?

It's worse than I thought.

What is?

- Honey, are you even in there?
- What?

What did they give you?
Cough syrup?

Some sort of s-special syrup?

Some sort of breakfast
with stuff in it?

Are you done with
your line of questioning?

Well, honey, I'm just trying
to get to the bottom

of what happened
to my son Chip.

He's right here,
but I happen to be

in a freaking goat prison!

Honey, is this all
because of Sacramento?

- Are you mad about that?
- No, I'm just...

I'm trying to do something
different, Mom, okay?

And I'm just, you know, trying
to find out who I really am.

You're Chip Baskets.

Chip Baskets.

Now stop being so ridiculous.

My...

Mom, my-my feelings
are not ridiculous.

When you went to sell the
rodeo without even consulting me,

I felt erased.
I'm not an extension of you.

Is this you talking or
is this that Tiffany talking?

Her name is Tammy.

Is this Tammy talking
or you talking?

It's me talking, Mom.

Where is she, Chip?
I need an address.

I don't...

Mom, do not talk to her.

Mom, please.

Where is she?

- Do not talk to her.
- I'll find her.

- I will.
- Mom.

I'm gonna find her.
I-I will...

Chip. Chip.

It's a good thing
you are locked up.

Grabbing your mother!

Okay, this is
the hole in one, girls.

Don't you doubt me.

What's that?

Can you please get off
the center of the fairway?

Ladies, can we get
this show on the road?

Well, I would love to,
but there seems to be

some kind of commotion
on the green.

- See?
- Move!

What have you done to my son?

Oh, no.

You're stopping up
the whole golf course.

Well, it's her fault!

She brainwashed my son,

and I'm not leaving here
till I get some answers.

It's okay, everybody.
I've got this under control.

Know what?
We're just gonna go on ahead.

Excuse me.

Enjoy your soap opera.

You must be Christine Baskets.

You're exactly the way
Chip described you.

Well, I'm really sorry,
but I have no idea where Chip is.

He walked away from my house
andhe hasn't contacted me since.

Well, you're responsible
for whatever happens to Chip.

Chip is his own person.

He's making his own choices,

and frankly they're
very good ones right now.

So if you hear from him
or you see him,

just tell him that
I'd love for him to come back.

The door is open.
For you, too, by the way.


Ha! Good one.

Is that how she got you ladies?

Are you part of the cult?

Are you in a trance right now?

Mm.

They look really out of it.

Christine...

do you really want Chip
living at home with you

for the rest of his life?

He wants to improve himself
if you'll let him.

I did let him improve himself.

I gave him the money for
the down payment on the condo.

Where do you think he got
the money that he gave you?

It was from me.

And that wasn't his money
to give to some charlatan.

He likes what I have to offer.
A lot of people do.

He likes shiny things.

Well, he signed a contract
with us.

- Do you want to be his mommy?
- No.

No. I'm his mommy.
He's already got one.

And you're gonna do him
more damage

day after day after day.

- Mm-hmm.
- I can see it in your eyes.

Oh.

What's going on?

- Get over here.
- What?

- I want to spank you!
- Mom!

What are you doing? Ow!

- I am so mad at you!
- Ow! -

- Mom, what are you... Stop!
- Why would you give

that woman all that money?!

It's my money.
I can do what I want, Mom.

My buttocks is k*lling me.

For God's sakes, this woman
doesn't care about you.

She's taking advantage
of a vulnerable person.

You know, sometimes
I think you just want to fail at life.

Oh, really? Like I, like
I f-failed at-at clown college

and I fail at the rodeo?

Oh, God.

Well, you got to go
to clown college.

You got a rodeo.

Or-or-or maybe
my-my-my marriage failed

because of me?

Another woman who was trying
to take advantage of you.

Do you think
she loved you?

I mean, she was a lovely person
and very beautiful,

talented and all the rest,
but...

I don't think
she cared about you.

Mom...

you need to accept the fact
that you...

you don't always know
what's best for me.

Ever since Dad d*ed,
you've been trying to fix me.

You know who
you should've fixed? Dad.

But I mean fixed down here.

- You know what I mean?
- Oh...

'Cause that way,
you-you guys

would've never had me
and what's-his-face.

Dale.

I'm sorry, Chip.

I'm sorry, 'cause
when your dad d*ed,

I was just trying to protect you
from all the pain.

Maybe I was trying to fix you.
I don't know.

Or maybe I was just trying
to feel better myself.

I know this:

that those people
don't care about you.

They're not your family.

Wonder where that goat went.

Oh, there's that old goat.

He's up to mischief.

Ah, they say they'll eat
anything, won't they?

Yeah, they'll eat anything.

You know, Dale,
that's pretty nice,

the way you went so far out
for your brother.

Sometimes you go
a little too far,

- but it's really nice.
- Well...

You're a really good brother,
you know that?

Well, don't try to butter me uptoo
much, Ken.

- You ever had goat's milk?
- On my cereal.

Oh.

I once drank it
straight from the teat

at my Aunt Helen's house
when I was a kid.

I love you, Chip.

And I have spent the majority
of my life trying to help you.

You're my precious boy.

Yeah, well, that's just it, Mom.
I'm not, I'm not a boy.

I'm a grown-up.

And I'm a clown, you know?

And when I clown, sometimes
I fall and slip on a banana.

And I get back up, and,
you know, I step on a rake,

and it hits me in the face.

But I get up again,
just like I do as a grown-up.

I just want you to treat me...

like an adult.

And I'll do the same for you.

Well, you can't
give that woman that money.

I know.

Sorry about grabbing
your... your outfit earlier.

Well, it's pretty strong.

And I'm sorry about
spanking you.

I'm sure I'm gonna have welts
in my left buttocks cheek.

Well, you're all
grown up now, so...

take care of those welts.

Hey, I'm looking
for Martha Brooks.

Oh, hey, Chip.

Got you these.
Where would you like them?

Oh, wow.
Um, well, actually...

I'll put...
you want me to put them over here?

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

How's your arm?

It still works.

You know, that cast
saved your arm's life.

Yeah, I guess
carpal tunnel has its perks.

Um... I'm really sorry about
all that stuff with Tammy

and Dale and...
all the roughhousing.

Just got out of hand.

I, uh... uh, maybe I got
out of hand, too, you know?

There's just...

just a lot of changes.

Mom's moving to Denver.

You're not moving to Denver,
are you?

Mm-mm. No.
I have no reason to.

Okay, well,
thanks for coming, Chip,

but I was watching
Judge Joe Brown

before you got here,
and I think

they're about to announce
the verdict, so maybe...

That's it for the visit?

I-I've been here
for two minutes.

Scoot over.

- What do you mean?
- Scooch.

What's this case about?

- Uh...
- Sorry..

Well, um, it's this guy says
that the lady took his money,

but she says that
he was her boyfriend

- and he loaned it to her.
- Hmm.

You think the nurse will
bring in some popcorn?

No.

♪ I know you ♪

♪ I know you... ♪

Dale.
Would you help your mother?

- Yeah, I'll give you a shove.
- Oh, thank you, honey.

- I love this shawl that you wear.
- Ready?

- Isn't it something?
- Here, Mom. It's beautiful.

Oh. It's part tiger,
part rainbow.

Ooh.

Well, best of luck to you.

I'll be back before you know it.

Well, take your time.

You're always funny.

Could someone give me a hand
with these last few suitcases?

- Well, I'm already in.
- Yeah, I'll be right there.

Well, Mom, all the squeaky
toys are accounted for.

Oh, the kitties will be happy
about that.

What are you gonna do, honey?

You know, I don't know,
and I feel pretty good about it.

That's a good attitude.

- I like that.
- I'll give you...

What are you coming in to... Oh,
you're gonna give me a hug.

You're so sweet.

Bye, Mom.

- I love you.
- I love you, Chip.

- Bye, Dad.
- Bye, son.

- Take care.
- Take care of Mom.

I will.

♪ You know me... ♪

- You ready, baby?
- Ready, baby.

Let's do it.

Let's hit the road, Jack.

I mean Ken.

Well, we finally chased her
out of town, didn't we?

Peace out.

♪ Too well ♪

♪ But if all those ♪

♪ Petty fears ♪

♪ Make every woman ♪

♪ Blind ♪

♪ Every woman ♪

♪ Blind ♪

♪ Then you read ev... ♪

♪ You read ev... ♪

♪ ...very woman's mind ♪

♪ Ev... ♪

♪ ...very woman's ♪

♪ Mind. ♪
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