03x15 - Black Vortex, Part 2

[bunniefuu]

[Quill]
Okay. The good news is, we saved
the shrunken Kree home world,

which is expanding back
to its normal size.

The bad news--

[computer]
Self-destruct in two minutes.

...is fairly self-explanatory.

[alarm blaring]

This is it, everyone.

[clicks]

Peter, wait.
Did you see that mirror

in the weapons vault?

You mind, Gamora?

I'm trying to spend
my final moments
in this galaxy

with some mid-'70s
one-hit wonders.

They may not have to be
your final moments.

That mirror
is called
the Black Vortex.

Thanos said it was an
indestructible prison.

Drax approves
of indestructible.

Yeah, well, Rocket
don't approve of no prison.

I am Groot.

Good point, bud.

Ain't a prison in the galaxy
I can't escape.

The thing is, this prison
isn't exactly in the galaxy.

[alarm continues blaring]

[Quill]
I don't know, Gamora.

This thing looks,
like, super evil.

Self-destruct in 15 seconds.

Who am I to judge?

Everyone hold hands
so we don't get separated.

I am Groot!

[yelling]

[yelling]

[groaning]

Aah! What the flarg?
How did I get here?

Hey! This ain't my usual tail.

This ain't my usual look.

Where is everybody?

Groot? Ya in here, bud?
Or the rest of you, anyway.

[automated voice] Welcome
to the Timely Corporation
Distribution Warehouse.

When it absolutely, positively
has to get across the galaxy

before the next
planetary rotation.

For your own safety,
please stay off
the conveyor belts.

Come on. You guys gotta be
around here somewhere.

[Gamora on comm link]
Rocket. Rocket!

Gamora? That you?
Where are you?

Scratch that.
Where am I?

The place you're at isn't real.
You've got to get out of there.

And just how the flarg
am I supposed to find an exit?

Huh? Huh!

Huh. That's encouraging.

That-- not so much.

Huh?

That don't make any sense.

Groot, you're small again!

[automated voice]
All packing materials
must comply

with the Timely Corporation's
routine durability inspection
prior to shipping.

Good luck.

And you're about
to become kindling!

Groot. Groot!

[automated voice]
Please remove all plants
and animals from packages

prior to inspection
to prevent vaporization.

I ain't going nowhere
without my best bud,

even if he is
travel-sized again.

Hang on, Groot!
I'll get you outta this!

[grunts]

Whew!

Huh?

Hey! Claws off
the merchandise!

[grunting]

Huh?

Krutack!
[grunting]

[yells]

[yelling]

[grunting]

For your safety,
please stay off
the conveyor belt.

The Timely Corporation
is not responsible
for any bruising, impalement,

incineration, encasing,
folding, repackaging,
dissection,

laceration, electrocution,
sudden loss of balance,

loss of life, loss of limb,
loss of fur, loss of tail,
or itching.

[yelling, blowing]

[panting]

Prepare package
for Bubble Wrap.

Eh?

[muffled yelling]

There you are!
Sit tight! I gotcha!

Huh?

Groot!

Yah!

[grunts]

[babbles]
Wha--

Hey, nobody puts my bud
in the wood chipper!

[grunting]

Huh! That all you got?
[yelling]

Yah!

[grunting]

Better appreciate
what I'm doing for you, bud.

[grunts]

No-good,
double-crossing duct tape!

You're supposed to get me
out of sticky situations,
not into them!

Hang on, Groot!

[whirring]

Huh?

Warning. Screwdriver in use.

This whole place
has a screw loose!

[yells]

Nooooo!
[grunts]

Huh?
[grunts]

We are also not responsible
for dizziness, loss of lunch,

fatigue, or general
bad temperament.

[grunts]

I'll show ya bad temperament!

Warning. Pneumatic tubes
are for packages only.

No running, climbing, jumping,
crawling, scampering,

sliding, slipping, falling,
or even peeking
inside the tubes.

[grunts]

Welcome to
the Shipping Department.

All packages must be
clearly marked with the proper
Galactic Sector Code.

The timely corporation
is not responsible
for lost or damaged packages,

even if we lost
or damaged them.

[grunting]

This is more frustrating
than trying to explain
a joke to Drax!

Preparing package for shipment
to the Waytheflargoutus System,

edge of the Galactic Frontier.

"Edge of
the Galactic Frontier"?!

Not on my watch,
bolts-for-brains!
[grunts]

Grooooot!

[yells]

Packages ready for shipment.

Preparing package
for shipment to
the Krutackinfarawayus System,

opposite edge
of the Galactic Frontier.

Hey! Hey!

[angry grunt]
Let me out!

Sheesh!
What are they packing
in this place, anyway?

Oh. Yeah.

[maniacal laughter]

Not so fast, fly-boy.
That's my bud in there!

Now quit struggling,
and let me reel him in!

Delivery obstacle detected.

All available units,
eliminate obstacle.

Flarg.

[yells]

[chuckles]
Buy one, get the rest for free.

This may be a nightmare,
but the toys are
an absolute dream!

Krutack!
I hope that crate's
tougher than it looks.

Uhh! Speak to me, bud.
Say something.

Any three words
starting with "I,"

and "am,"
and ending with "Groot"!

[grunts]

Obstacle acquired.
Elimination in progress.

Those ain't the words
I was looking for.

Activating Timely Corporation
Security Drone.

Prepare to be eliminated.

I save you from getting chopped
into wood chips,
and this is the thanks I get?

[groans]

[grunts]

[Gamora on comm link]
Rocket!

Huh? Oh, heya, Gammy.

You need to get
out of there, now!

Is Groot with you?

No, I'm alone. Now go!
You're out of time!

Well, I ain't leaving
without at least
part of the real Groot!

[yells]

Whoa!

No.
[grunts]

No.

Definitely not!

Ha! Yes!
Gotcha, bud!

Almost there.
Almost there.

Wait a minute.
[grunts]

Seriously?!

Fine.

If you can't find an exit,
make an exit!

[grunts]
I declare a warehouse fire sale!

[automated voice]
Warning. The Timely Corporation
does not approve

of this unauthorized use
of security personnel.

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Eh!
[babbles]

[clangs]

Nothing personal, spark plug,

but I prefer a Groot
who don't run on batteries.

[clangs]

[clattering]

Now to find the real Groot,
and the other losers,

and get the flarg
outta this nightmare!

[Groot groaning]

I am Groot.

[sighs]
And I am suddenly alone.

But... how did I get here?

I am J'Que.

I am Groot.

But we know
each other, J'Que.

Tell me, friend,
have you seen
the other Guardians?

I am J'Que!

I am aware of that.

Why do you not
understand me?

I am J'Que!

[sighs]
I am sure there is no need
to get upset.

Just please
answer my question.

Are my friends here?

[crackling]

I am concerned.

What is that?

[door opens]

No, wait!

[cries out]

J'Que!

J'Que, are you hurt?

I am J'Que!

[gasps]

I am J'Que!

[both grunting]

I am Groot, not your enemy!

[grunts, groans]

[panting]

[panting continues]

Huh?

Cosmo!
We are in danger.

There is a strange infection
spreading throughout Knowhere.

I am Cosmo.

[gasps]

I am Groot.
But you are not yourself.

[grunts]

I am Cosmo.

I am Cosmo!
I am Cosmo!

I am dreaming.
This cannot be real!

[grunts]

I... am... Cosmo.

[grunting]

I am sorry for this.
[grunts]

Cosmo, fetch!

[sniffing]

I am Cosmo.

[pants, grunts]

Impossible.
Our ship was destroyed!

Wasn't it?

[crackling]

The infection approaches.

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunting]
My friend!

I am finally free
of this nightmare.

I am Groot.

But are you yourself?

I am Rocket.

Not you too.

[gasps]

I am Rocket.

[grunting]

I am Groot!

I will not fight you,
Rocket.

And if there is anything
of my true friend inside you,

you will not
fight me either!

I... am...

Rocket!
[snarls]

[grunting]

[g*nf*re continues]

No, you're not!

[screaming]

♪♪ [women vocalizing]

[groans]

♪♪ [vocalizing continues]

[wind howling softly]

[groaning]

Wha-- I am home?

[birds twittering]

But... how?

My world was destroyed.

[Grootlings]
We are Groot!

We are Groot!

I am Groot.

But are you?

Are you really the Grootlings
I seeded?

Are my people truly reborn?

We are Groot! We are Groot!

[chuckles]

We are Groot.

And we will never again
be alone in this universe.

[Grootlings]
Huh?

No. Not here.

Not now!

[straining]

[yells]

[Grootlings crying out]

[growling]

[roaring]

[roaring]

[roaring]

[thudding footfalls]

[grunting]

I am Groot.

[grunts]
I am Groot!

[roars]

[grunts]

[panting]

I... am... Groot.

[grunting]

I am Groot!

[Black Vortex growling]

Yes, you are Groot,

and I am the Black Vortex.

I have been trapped
inside this prison
for an eternity.

Now I can finally escape.

Prepare to become one
with the Black Vortex.

[grunting]

[straining]

Your body will be our vessel,

and your sacrifice
will bring forth a new galaxy.

A galaxy ruled by darkness!

[Gamora on comm link]
Groot, come in!

Why won't you answer
your comm? Groot!

[wind howling softly]

[gasping]

I am Groot.

Groot, I hear you.
Where are you?

[gasps]

I am Groot!

I will not allow this!

No one escapes
the Black Vortex!

[crying out]

[chuckling]

[laughing]

[gasps]

I am...

[gasps]

Groot!

Okay, Groot.
I understand.

Lead the way.