02x08 - Phase Two Sucks

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Imposters". Aired February 2017 - June 2018.*
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"Imposters" revolves around a con artist who gets men and women to fall in love with her and take advantage of them. Three of her former victims team up to track her down.
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02x08 - Phase Two Sucks

Post by bunniefuu »

- Previously on "Imposters"...
- Where did you hide the ring?

Um, you're not gonna like it.

So this ring, how much is it worth?

At least $ million.

- Okay, I'll help you.
- Yeah?

But when you get it back,
I get % of the ring.

Okay.

Tell me more about Sofia.

I know a lot about punishment...

the punisher, the punished,

the one who says, "That's enough."

Off you go.

[yelling]

Calm down!

Look, we had a problem here.

I'm very sorry.

It wasn't supposed to go down this way.

Here it is, Ezra.

You and Julia and Richard...

until further notice, you work for me.

This is Charlotte Grovesnor.

Miss Grovesnor lives in Burlington,
Vermont,

and is one of the foremost
collectors of Toby jugs.

Just get the saffron diamond ring,

deliver it to the Doctor,

and then you can go your
bumbling little way.

Time to make our move.

The Doctor,
we're gonna s*ab him in the back, Maxie,

and then in the front

and then maybe on both sides.

We all want out from under his thumb.

We're gonna put together
everything we've ever learned...

every trick,
every sleight of hand, every scam.

We're gonna hunt him down,

and before we deliver him to the FBI,

we'll take him for everything he's got.

Systematic release of metals
with carcinogenic potential.

Which is why, despite the conspicuous
apathy displayed by my colleagues,

there can be no doubt that leaving
orthopedic fixation devices in situ

- should be considered nothing short of malpractice.
- Doctor. Doctor.

I'm sorry;
do you have a question for the panel?

I'm coming to that.

Because we have colleagues
who do have questions.

Then I'll continue.

If you'll try to follow my thinking,

the only reason to not remove an implant

would be the incompetency
of the surgeon.

We followed just fine, Jeffrey.

But if we're talking
about implant removal,

maybe... you know, just maybe...

someone should finally remove
that stick from your ass.

[scattered laughter]

And that's all the time
we have for questions,

so I guess I'll see
you all at happy hour.

♪ Those tender kisses ♪

♪ That we first shared ♪

♪ Under the moonlight ♪

♪ When I first dared ♪

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[glass shatters]

[music intensifies]

[laid-back music]

♪ ♪

It's a nice place, Vermont...

the hills, the trees,
the quaint little farms.


And the cows.

So many cows.

And the cows. Here we go.

What's this?

You're working for the Doctor now.

- He covers expenses.
- Damn.

Got to spend money to make money.

It's not a perk, Richard.
You know, the Doctor is...

- We know.
- Good.

While you get the ring,
we'll do some digging.

If we're going to take the Doctor down,
we need to find out who he really is.

Okay, let's go.

No, you're staying here.

You want me to babysit?

Supervise.

Uh, we don't need babysitting.

This is the plan.

Is that understood?

[sighs]

Then let's begin.

Your mark is Charlotte Grovesnor.

She's , divorced, no kids.

Modest, independent means.

Every Thursday,
Charlotte goes to the antique mall.


She goes there for one
thing and one thing only.


Hello, there.

Can I interest you in an Amish quilt?

Or perhaps a Jan McLean doll?

Or maybe a Toby jug.

Got a lot of interest
for this one, today.

No, thank you. Not for me.

Ah, here we are.

$ , was it?

it is for the very rare Toby jug.

- Glad it's still here.
- I'll box that up for you.

You're charging this man
for a Royal Doulton d*ck Turpin.

No, it's a very rare
Royal Worchester.

You expect anyone to believe that?

Sorry, what seems to be the trouble?

Nothing. This lady's just confused.

Excuse me. I happen to be an expert.

And that thing is not
worth more than $ .

- Oh, my.
- Hey.

If you mess with my livelihood,

I will knock you on your ass.

Knock me?

Surely there's no cause
to thr*aten the lady.

This right here is no lady.

I'm canceling my sale.

Hey, Downton Abbey, read the sign.

All sales are final. We're closed.

Excuse me.

Hey! Uh-uh.

It's my money.

This is outrageous.

Instead of us, why don't you throw out
that absolute fraud in there?

That was very kind of you.

Oh, I should be thanking you.

I'd never have known
I was being taken for such a fool.

Yeah, that kind of dishonesty
is just disgusting.

Oh, how rude of me. I'm Clive.

I'm Clive Rhumegai.

Charlotte. Uh, Grovesnor.

Nice to meet you, Clive.

[both chuckle]

Good luck to you.

And to you.

After working for someone
for over ten years,

you'd think you'd know a hell
of a lot more about them.

Well, let's assume Cy's right.

The Doctor is a real doctor,
lives in Buffalo.

That's still quite the haystack.

Where in Buffalo? What kind of doctor?

Where does he like to go to dinner?

Holy sh*t, I bet you everything I own
that he's an orthopedic surgeon.

Max, you own nothing.

Yes, well, call it a hunch then, okay?

Ah, this is the pen he used
when I went to see him.

I pocketed it.

It's a flag pen.

They hand them out at special events...

like medical conferences.

Well, well, a good place to start.

There's no record of him on
the guest list, no pictures.

sh*t.

Well, there are probably
more pictures, right?

He'd probably try not
to get photographed.

What is that?

Official conference photographer,
Allen Klugemar.

Well, he should be easy to get to.

[music playing in the distance]

What?

You're enjoying this.

No, I'm not.

I'm owning it.

There's a difference.

I've learned not to
punish myself anymore,

that the choices I've made,
the things that I've done,

there's the punished, the punisher...

And the one that says,
"That's enough. Off you go."

Yeah, I heard that little
Lenny Cohen speech before.

I'd take it with a grain of salt, Jules.

Lenny's insane.

Showtime.

Can I get a latte, please?

You can go easy on the foam.

Thank you.

I told him I don't do Vermont.
I do Manhattan.

Brooklyn, if I'm feeling adventurous.

But trust me; the bigger deals,
they pay for the smaller ones.

- Here is your latte.
- Thank you.

Yeah, I know.

All right, got to go. Arigato.

- And he just sent you their counteroffer.
- Uh-huh.

Well, this is predictably terrible.

Where is Clive?

Oh, he just texted. Running behind.

Peeping in every antique shop
window, no doubt.

He's obsessed.

They call this a latte?
We need a do-over.

Off you go.

Okay. Uh, here we are.

- So sorry.
- There's my favorite client.

Mwah, mwah.

Why, hello.

Hello again.

Um, excuse me, ladies. This is, um...

- Charlotte.
- Charlotte.

Yes, she and I met in rather sort of

an unexpected fashion
at the antique mall.

Mm, adorable.

Could you just give me a second?

- I was just leaving.
- No, I'm so sorry. I'm...

I was so flustered yesterday that I...

well, I completely forgot to ask.

You're an expert in Toby jugs,

and the thing is,
I'm on a bit of a mission

to find just the right sort,
and I was wondering

if I could take you to lunch tomorrow.

- Lunch?
- Yeah.

Just to pick your brain, as it were.

I mean, if that wouldn't be
too much of a chore.

Lunch...

would be nice, sure.

- Wonderful.
- Yeah.

Oh, um, sorry.

- [laughs]
- Got it, right.

That's my card.

Text me the time and place, and I'll...

I'll see you there.

Very much looking forward to it,
Charlotte.

Yeah.

Well, look at you.

You're a natural.

[clicks tongue]

Ugh, so much food.

So much free food.

Working for the Doctor does have perks.

Maddie's just bitter.

What am I bitter about?

Oh, hey!

All that matters is
Charlotte took the bait.

Lunch is a go.

A long-form distraction con only works

if you know your contingencies,
if you've done your homework,

and I'm not seeing much studying.

She keeps a house key in a fake rock.

All we have to do is sneak in,
find the jug, get the ring.

Mic drop!

[folder thuds]

What if the ring isn't in the jug?

Then that's on the Doctor.
It's his intel.

[sighs] And you really think
he's gonna see it that way?

We know what we're doing.

You do?

Well, maybe you don't need me, then.

Maybe we don't.

Good luck.

- Okay, what's wrong?
- I'm fine.


You're not fine. I can tell.

I'm intuitive.

Did you sign up for Word of the Day?

I need your head in the game.

It is.

Maddie said something.

It got under my skin.

Well, that's what she does.

I know; I just thought
I had a breakthrough,

and now I don't know.

Well, you know what's
better than a breakthrough?

A break-in.

Let's just get the stupid ring.

[car engine turns over]

So what part of England are you from?

I'm not sure I can place your accent.

Oh. [laughs]

Well, I'm... I'm from Notting Hill.

Mostly from...
my accent's from "Notting Hill."

Well, this looks lovely.

Certainly better than what
you must be used to back home.

Uh, the food in Britain...

Oh.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have said
that about the food.

I've never actually been to England.

I'd like to go... maybe.

- I don't... I don't know, someday.
- Well, you should.

I don't like to travel.

In general, I find
dealing with people, strangers

problematic.

I see.

Mm.

So when did you start collecting Tobies?

Oh, when I was .

Yeah, I saw a whitewashed Phillips
at a fair, and it charmed me.

And I bought it on a lark,

and then I was off to the races.

[chuckles]

What about you?

Uh, well, I'm... I'm new to it, really.

Yes.

My father, uh, he... [clears throat]

He, uh... he loved them,

had some in the pub he ran.

So when I decided to open
a hotel and pub here,

well, any pub of mine will have
its fair share of Toby jugs.

Hooray!

I'm not off to the best start, really,
collecting-wise.

Thank goodness you stepped in.

The antique business is
just filled with hucksters.

I supposed I could use a good tutor.

Any Toby jugs?

A few in the bedroom.

I checked them all, though. No ring.

[sighs]

sh*t.

And this one...
Okay, see this right here?

- Yeah, I see.
- It folds down.

That's a mistake.

Yeah, which makes this one very,
very rare and valuable.

I see. [laughs]

- Splendid.
- Yeah.

Oh, my apologies.

Work is a little, um...

_

So sorry.

- Valuable...
- Mm-hmm.

- You were saying.
- Yes.

Well, that must be...

You must take great
care to keep them safe.

Oh, I do.

I have built a climate-controlled room.

It's sort of elaborate, I guess, but...

Your jugs are worth it.

- Oh, God.
- [laughs]

Sorry. Silly me.

Well, you're not
the first one to notice.

[laughs] Oh.

Anyway, this climate-controlled room?

Oh, I certainly hope
you're not just interested in my jugs.

No, no, just the room.

Just the room. In the attic, was it?

No, it's a cellar.

But not just anyone gets
to play around with...

Yes, yes, of course.

Sorry, I just need to...
Just excuse me one second.

I just need the loo.

[laughter]

- Hello?
- Okay, listen.

It's in the cellar, okay?

You got to get down there.
It's in a whole room.

She's got a whole room of these things.

He says there's a cellar?

Yeah, off the pantry.

What do you mean, off the pantry?

My mom never would have
kept a Toby jug in a cellar.

Jesus Christ, Richard.

Yeah, down we go, Ez.

Cellar.

Ah, yes.

- No.
- [handle rattling]

- Oh, come on!
- sh*t.

[grunting]

Oh, are we done already?

I'm sorry. I really have to go.

So soon?

But we were having such a lovely time.

I shouldn't have had
that second glass of wine.

It's inappropriate.

No, not at all. It was...

I saw that look of disgust on your face.

I know that look.

No, no, please. It was...

At least let me walk you to your car.

No, thank you. Good-bye.

I'm going home.

[device chimes]

And sh*t, their lunch is over.

- sh*t!
- Ezra thinks she might be headed back.

What? Phase two sucks.

Totally.

- What happened there, man?
- I don't know.


Everything was going great.
We were having fun.

We're drinking wine, and...

and she starts getting,
like, flirty, you know?

Like, really flirty.

And she sort of freaked out and
got embarrassed or something.

- Flirty?
- Yeah.

That's good. What's the problem?

What's the problem?

It sounds like "semi-shy lady
who wants to love again" sh*t.

You got to lean into that.

You want me to seduce her?

[chuckles] No, no,
that was not the play here.

Okay, no, not seduce

but like what he said,
"lean in" to her...

romantic desire for you.

We're all aware of
the insane irony here.

Of course we are.

We're not heartless.

No, you just need me to be.

Unbelievable.

Where are you going?

[door shuts]

The only way we're
getting in that basement

is if Charlotte lets me in.

And the only way she lets me in...

Is if you give her what she wants.

You mean deceive her

into thinking I'm in love with her.

Look, you want my advice?

Find another way to get that ring.

Sledgehammer, maybe.

The next part's not for you.

What does that mean? What part?

The next part, the hard part.

It's not for people like you.

People like you are better than me.

Aren't you better than me?

Tell me the hard part, Maddie.

You want to know how I got
you to fall in love with me?

It's not a con.

You have to show that person
a part of your true self.

Then you need to find
something in that person

that you can really,
truly fall in love with.

That's how you do what I do.

You should be very careful, Ezra.

Some people are really hard to get over.

What kind of lens is this?

I'm sorry, Detective.

Can you please put that down?

Mr. Klugemar, this doesn't have
to be so complicated.

I can't just give my work over
to the police, not without...

I'm really getting into Instagram.

- You know Instagram?
- Sir, please.

- It's very expensive equipment.
- No sh*t. How much?

- My livelihood.
- Whoa, whoa.

Excuse me.

All right,
let's come back with a warrant.

When we come back,
we just need the photographs, right?

I mean, we don't need
to take all his equipment.

We get a warrant, we can take
whatever we goddam please.

Oof. It's his livelihood.

[sighs]

Thumb drive okay?

- Hello?
- Hi, Charlotte.

It's Clive.

Hello.

I just wanted to call.

I couldn't bear the thought
that I'd offended you somehow.

I'm afraid I...

I haven't quite been myself

these last few days.

I've been keeping my head up, but...

the loss is... is taking a toll.

Your... your father?

Yes, my father.

I'm sorry.

Th...

Hello?

Clive?

Yeah, I'm here. Um...

Sorry if I was off at lunch.

The truth is...

The truth is,
I feel connected to you, Charlotte.

I... I don't know
quite how to explain it,


but I feel it very strongly.

And unless I'm crazy,

which is entirely possible,

I think you feel it too.

Do you think Lenny Cohen's insane?

I mean, I'm not
a mental health professional,

but, like, yeah.

Do you think insane people
can still be right sometimes?

Well, the world is insane,

so they probably have some insight.

[door opens]

You're back in.

Give him a minute.

[lively music]

♪ ♪

Anything?

No.

♪ ♪

- Hello.
- What?

Look at this.

That's him. Holy sh*t.

- Yep.
- There he is.

Guess it's time we pay a visit
to Drs. Grady and Spinnelli.

Dr. Grady?

Can I help you?

Carl Mathers,
American Medical Association.

Can I have just a moment of your time?

Can you confirm the name
of this gentleman for me?

- You mean Jeffrey?
- Jeffrey.

Yeah, Jeffrey Hull.

_

Hey, sweetheart.

Candy Bishop.

I called earlier for Dr. Spinnelli.

I don't like the P so much.

I find the grip a little sticky.

Uh-huh.

You know who said the
same thing the other day?

Dr. Jeffrey Hull? Do you know him?

Just kind of a prick.

Knows everything about everything.

- He thinks he's a theorist.
- [chortles]

Treats the rest of us

like we're just
mechanics doing tune-ups.

But I never worked with him.

He travels all over.

As far as I know,
he doesn't have a physical practice.

Oh, I got to go.

You know who's got a
crazy story about Jeffrey?

You know who you should talk to?

Both: We need to see Dr. Henry Price.

[chuckles] Henry Price it is.

You... you have a beautiful home.

Thank you.

I have trouble keeping it tidy,

maybe because I live by myself;
I don't know.

Anyway, I've hired one of those
professional organizer people.

She's coming back tomorrow.
Declutters for you.

Yes! I've heard of that, yes.

Gosh, I suppose I've been
a bit cluttered lately.

I think I could use a declutterer.

Grief can be very destabilizing.

Was it sudden?

His passing?

It was, yeah.

Yeah.

I can't help but think

that if I'd just been
there at that moment,

that I could have done
something to stop it,

you know?

Anyway, opening this pub
is my attempt to honor him, in a way.

And as silly as it sounds,
the Toby jugs are part of that...

getting it right.

I don't think that's silly at all.

Maybe that's how you show your love.

Would you like to see my collection?


Very much.

[both laugh]

- They're kind of steep.
- Yes.

[buttons beeping]

- Come in.
- My pleasure.

[both laugh]

Holy... sugar lumps!

I bet you'll never guess
which one was my first.

No, I don't think I will.

Hey, can you stop?

[sighs] Sorry.

I'm concerned about our friend, man.

You think he's gonna screw it up?

It's not that.

Ezra's a good dude, you know?

We used to have a code,

and now we're seducing
lonely Vermont chicks.

How did we get here?

I'm not worried about him messing it up.

I'm worried about what happens
to him if he does it right.

You know?

It's incredible.

You've taken such care.

You've... you've obviously
put such love into this.

Shall we have some more wine?

Wonderful.

You stopped.

Yes, I was...

Ooh.

You okay?

Whoa!

[laughter]

It's a very slippery floor. I just...

- Here we go.
- Wine.

- Yes.
- Wine.

I will grab some.

You make yourself comfortable.

- I'll bring it in.
- Right.

[phone buzzes]

- Hello?
- It's me.

Did you get it?

No, there is a bajillion.

I need a picture of the
one I'm looking for.

And hurry; it's about to get weird.

[footsteps approaching]

What do you say we head upstairs?

There's a bajillion different Toby jugs.

He needs a picture.

What?

The sh*t's not gonna be on Google.

It was sort of a one-of-a-kind deal.

I'll draw it.

Describe it to me.

What are you talking about?

Like a police sketch. Describe it!

I... what? I... how?

Ta-da!

Oh, how lovely.

Lie down.

Here? On... on the...

Yup.

Right here on the bed.

[laughs]

Ooh, look at how fine this mattress is.

Is... is it one
of those new kinds with...

Shh!

No more talking.

[laughing hysterically]

Whoa.

Oh, dear!

What? What's wrong?

The Toby jugs.

All the little faces, you know,

looking at us like little
spies or something.

Oh, God!

Is that odd of me to say?

Oh, yikes.

I'll fix it in a jiffy.

Bye-bye.

_

_

- Better?
- Yeah, much.

That fixes everything.

So...

Got any more jokes about jugs?

N-n-n-nothing at the moment, no.

Holds water, handle.

Uh, a dude. You have to get a hat on.

You have to be specific.

I am!

He had a hat with stripes on it,
like, right here.

And a bird, like an eagle,
on his shoulder.

Like an eagle or a falcon?

That's what I mean by specific.

[sighs] I don't know.

It was a bird, okay?

It was a... actually,
it might have been a fish.

Seriously?

Okay, what about his expression?

The fish's?

The dude's.

This face has been part of your life
since you were a little kid.

Okay! Stop attacking me!

It was...

stern, I guess.

But kind of also, in the eyes, gentle,

like you wanted him to be proud of you.

But he's not gonna say much,

'cause he's a man of few words,
obviously.

But, like, say you had a great day

or a really great game,

like a game where you
broke the district record

for most yards carried.

Then when you got home,
he was staring right at you.

And he wouldn't smile

but just nod at you,
and he'd say, "Well done, Evans.

Well done."

That's definitely...

specific.

Yeah.

Oh, you feel so good.

What a kind, lovely man you are.

[moans]

- Um...
- A little too much?

- It's...
- No, I...

No, please don't misunderstand.

I get ahead of myself. That was stupid.

No, it's...

Oh!

Hey. Hey, come on.

- I'm sorry.
- Listen.

I just don't want to rush things.

I... I adore you, Charlotte.

Truly.

Let's take our time,

give ourselves a chance, huh?

How about breakfast?

I'll come back and make you breakfast.

I... look, I get your trepidation,

but British cooking might
actually surprise you.

[chuckles]

Breakfast sounds lovely.

[knock at door]

Come in.

So Charlotte's got feelings.

Sounds like you're
doing everything right.

What about your feelings?

Not so easy, is it?

No, it's not.

Yeah.

[chuckles]

You...

You never said you were sorry.

Why not?

You wouldn't have believed me.

They're just words.

Yeah, I know.

I want them anyway.

What does it matter if
you won't believe me?

I don't know. Try me.

You want the words?

Yeah, I want the words.

I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry, Ezra.

I'm so sorry.

Two sugars, Sally Sal.

Aw, Max.

That's him.

Dr. Price.

Sorry to bother you after your shift.

Jay Borkowski.
My associate, Greta Finnley.

Only malpractice
lawyers have associates.

[both laugh]

Can't argue with that, right?

You got a problem,
take it up with my lawyer.

Our problem's not with you.
We're here about Dr. Jeffrey Hull.

Can we buy you breakfast?

You used to work in orthopedics.
Is that right?

Orthopedic surgery.

Now I supervise the graveyard shift.

Think human beings are innately good?

Work a night in the ER.

What happened to your hand?

I got att*cked with a
broken highball glass.

Severed two tendons.

I might never operate again.

Police found nothing,
but I think it was him.

You think Jeffrey Hull is
the one who att*cked you?

I didn't see his face.

But yes.

Why would he do that?

We were at a conference
earlier this year.

I made a remark just off the cuff,

but I embarrassed him,
and so he hurt me.

Badly.

I should have just given him a spot.

I knew he was arrogant.

I just didn't know he was
a complete psychopath.

What do you mean, a spot?

He applies every six months
to present a paper at the conference.

Wants to lecture us,

prove he's the smartest guy in the room,

which he very may well be,

but it's like he just wants
to rub our faces in it.

A guy that smart,
and he only wants people

to kiss his ass.

Just please tell me

that you're suing him
for something juicy.

Sort of strange, isn't it,

to realize the Doctor's human,

find his Achilles heel?

Everybody's got one.

You did some great work, Sal.

Right? Just like the old days.

Hand in glove.

Hey, you know, it's still pretty early.

Why don't we treat ourselves?
We earned it.

It's : a.m.

Mimosas, then.

Oh.

There's no friends in the game, Max,

only cons and suckers.

I think you taught me that.

I used to be able to reach you.

Well, I used to have nothing to hide.

I think we need some light in here.

Tell me about this girl in Mexico.

Remember,
I told you you'd find love again.

Is she the one?

Can we... can we not...

I'm just wondering why
you left her behind.

You have no idea what
you're talking about, okay?

Or maybe you just did
what you had to do.

Don't do that.

Don't do what?

Commiserate with me,

act like we're the same.

I think we're more alike
than you want to admit.

Who came to whose room last night?

Well, you know what?
That was clearly a mistake.

And yet you knocked on my door.

What was that for?

Hmm?

To get your apology?

Or maybe you had something
else you wanted to say to me.

Maybe to thank me?

You think I'm gonna thank you?

Go on. I'm ready.

I want the words.

You're insane.

And you're full of sh*t.

You always cry about how you
wanted a life of adventure.

Well, guess who gave it to you

'cause you didn't have the balls

to go out there and get it yourself.

I didn't ruin your life, Ezra.

I saved it.

So go ahead;

say the words.

Go f... yourself.

[soft music]

♪ ♪

♪ It's not what you thought ♪

♪ What are the reasons for believing? ♪

Sorry it took so long.

♪ A body heads south ♪

♪ 'Cause your mouth ♪

Are you okay?

What happened last night?

I'm going back this morning.

I'll text you when I have the ring.

Be ready to go.

♪ The faces ♪

♪ I never thought I'd be ♪

♪ The places ♪

♪ I never thought I'd go ♪

[doorbell rings]

♪ It goes to show ♪

- Morning.
- Good morning.

Hope you're hungry.

Come on in.

♪ ♪

Do you need anything?

No, no, I think I've got ev...

Oh, rats.

What's wrong?

I forgot the tarragon.

It's sort of my secret w*apon.

Well, aren't you in luck?

I've got quite the green thumb.

You have a garden.

Flowers, vegetables, and herbs.

I will fetch us some.

You really are amazing, Charlotte.

[doorbell rings]

Oh, that is my organizer.

I will get the herbs.
You want to just let her in?

She knows where to start.

My pleasure.

[knocking at door]

- Hi.
- Hi...

[whispering] Sofia.

- What the f*ck are you doing here?
- What the hell are you doing here?

Did you get my note?
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