01x01 - The Thing in the Hole

[bunniefuu]

[FOREBODING MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- [SNARLING]

Luke! Hey, Luke, wake up! Come on!

Luke, wake up!

Did we get 'em? Is he dead?

Yes.

... and no.

[SNARLING]

We gotta go. Can you move?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Run!

Come on, come on!

[GROWLING AND SNARLING]

[THUD]

[GROWLING AND SNARLING]

[SCREAMING]

Woah!

Jesus Christ!

They're everywhere!

Did you know we had this many
dead people in town?

I never thought about that until today.

I think there's a fire escape
off that alley.

If we can make it there

we can take the roof tops
back towards the store.

Okay. Alright, let's do this.
Go, go, go.

[EATING SOUNDS]

Oh, sh*t!

Woah, woah, woah!

Where's the fire escape?

You said there was a fire escape!

I said I think there's a fire escape.

Oh, sh*t!

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

Uh, listen. Cam?

Hey, it's okay. We're good.

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[THUD]

Mom?!

Get in the car, boys.

[g*nsh*t]

[g*nsh*t]

[g*nsh*t]

You like that?

How's the second amendment
taste, m*therf*ckers?!

[g*nsh*t]

Mayor Bowman, we gotta go!

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

Wait, Lauren, stop the car!

Why are we stopped? Just go!

That's my dad.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

[LOUD RUMBLING]

What the hell was that?

Someone's gonna have to go down there.

Where's the new guy?

Blackwood!

What the hell? Why me?

'Cause you're the new guy.

[SIGHS] sh*t.

♪ ♪

Dammit.

Oh, come on.

[SCREAMS] Ahhhhhh!!!!!

♪ ♪

[RUMBLING]

What the hell?

[ALARM BEEPING]

♪ ♪

- ♪ ♪
- _

Hey Dad, I'm leaving.

For work.

Whatever, assh*le.

[PHONE RINGING]

McDermott.

Sorry to wake you.

No, no, I was up.

Cam and I got into it last night.

CAPTAIN PIKE: College thing again?

Yeah, same sh*t. So what's up?

Got a call from the Cleargenix
drill site.

Said they found a body.
I need you to go take a look.

Twenty bucks says it's one of
their dipshit frackers

that came to work drunk
and took a header into a well.

Don't get into the politics,

just see what the hell
they're talking about, okay?

Oh, and uh, just tell Cam
you're an assh*le

and that you're sorry.

CAPTAIN PIKE: He's your son, McDermott.

He's all you got left. Don't f*ck it up.

_

♪ ♪

_

♪ ♪

No, I know you can't control
the weather, Mom.

It's just, maybe if you would
have flown in

a little earlier.

No, no. Please don't make
this about Amy's parents

and their money.

Mom! Mom!

No, she did not put them on
Instagram to t*rture you,

it was her wedding shower!

[EXHALES]

Mom.

I am getting married today
and it would mean an awful lot

if you and dad could be there
so just let me know

the minute your plane
can take off, okay?

Yeah, I love you, too.

[SIGHS]

RECORDING: I am in control of my life.

I am in control of my life.

RECORDING: By the choices I make.

By the choices I make.

RECORDING: I am a powerful presence.

I am a powerful presence!

Jesus Christ!

RECORDING: I am calm and relaxed.

I am calm and relaxed.

_

Sweetheart?

Today is a very big day,

not just for me but
for our entire family.

I'm in a very tight race
and it would be unfortunate

if the mayor's son got caught
drinking underage

with his dickhead friends.

[SIGHS]

Do we have an understanding?

Yes, ma'am.

Oh, m'gosh, I sure do appreciate it.

[UNDER HIS BREATH] Great.

Oh, and Luke, honey, you're now.

Don't forget to vote.

Who should I vote for?

♪ ♪

Are you in charge of this site?

No.

Then why the hell do you think
it was your job

to call the cops?

We found a body.

That's what you're supposed to do.

Oh really, Blackwood?

You find a lot of dead bodies
in your life?

No.

Then how do you know
what you're supposed to do?

Half the town doesn't want us
here as it is.

They think we're contaminating
their water,

causing earthquakes or some bullshit,

and the last thing we need to do

is give them a reason to shut us down.

You weren't there! You didn't see it!

That's a person and somebody did
some messed up sh*t to him!

We're on a time table.

We go off schedule, it's my ass!

I'm sorry but I can't
un-call the police!

They're on their way.

[SIGHS]

You're right.

Um... I'm under a lot of pressure

and you did the right thing, okay?

Why don't you take the rest
of the day off?

Rhodes, I'm fine. I can work.

Well, we don't even know

when we're gonna be up
and running again,

and besides, after what
you've been through

you deserve a break, hmm?

See you tomorrow?

Hmm?

Hey.

I'll deal with the police.

I want the men back to work
and making holes by lunch!

_

Hey Lauren,

smoking that cigarette
makes you look real cool.

Thanks, Cam.

I've always wanted cool tips
from a guy wearing cargo shorts.

Why aren't you at school?

Senior skip day.

And you're here mowing the lawn?

Mmm-hmm.

Don't you have any friends?

I'm trying to make as much money
as I can

before the end of summer.

I barely have enough to pay
for first semester as it is.

Dad's still not down with
the whole Hawaii thing, huh?

That depends.

Ripping my acceptance letter
in half and throwing it

in the garbage in front of
my face sound down to you?

It does not.

Great.

Wasted my whole smoke break
talking to you.

Ahhh, so I'm saving you
from lung cancer.

Would you call me your hero?

No, I'd call you the assh*le
who made me miss my smoke break.

This uh, this thing we do,

it's gonna be one of the things
I miss most

when I get out of this sh*t-hole town.

Don't kid yourself.

You're never getting out
of this sh*t-hole town.

Is there a body under there?

No, it's a six-foot party
sub named... Jerry.

[EXHALES]

I do not know how you work
with dead bodies.

I'll take the dead
over the living any day.

♪ ♪

♪ I thought it was easy ♪

♪ I never thought I would find you ♪

♪ In my t-shirt, in my jacket ♪

♪ Standing in your shoes ♪

♪ Half baked, coming of age ♪

♪ Falling over the truth ♪

♪ On my shoulders, in a moment ♪

♪ If only you knew ♪

♪ Here's something really could happen ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Show me a little bit of
sunshine coming in my life ♪

♪ When we're older and it's over... ♪

♪ ♪

- [GASPS]
- Jesus!

Lauren, take it easy.

Why are you creeping up on me?

I'm not creeping up on you,
I'm checking up on you, hmm?

See how everything's going.

Look at this piece of crap.

Think of the poor wife, hmm?

Could you imagine doing it
with this guy?

I'd rather not.

Oh, hey, I gotta run out
a little bit later.

Do you think you can take care

of this bastard's services on your own?

My first solo funeral? Are you serious?

Yeah, you're ready.

Lazlo, this is awesome. Thank you.

Hey, maybe we can go out
for drinks tonight.

We can celebrate.

Lazlo, I'm days sober.

Congratulations, there's another
reason to celebrate.

Look.

[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY]

Bro.

Um, it's not you,

I just have this strict
no boning my boss policy.

Huh.

Also, it's a little bit you.

[CHUCKLES]

Well hey, that's cool.
I just thought it'd be nice.

Oh, uh, I can't believe I forgot
to tell you this.

I got a message from
your parole officer,

he wants me to call him back.

Probably just wants to check up on

how everything's going at work.

Make sure I'm... satisfied
with your performance.

I better go call him.

Lazlo!

One drink, and I'm getting a Diet Coke.

It's a date.

[RAP MUSIC]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Yo, I can't believe you got busted.

I told everybody we're
pulling up with brews.

Please don't call them brews, okay man?

You sound like my dad.

Do you know what the difference
is between me and your dad?

He's got a fridge full of brews.

And... he gets to plug your mom.

Damn, she is fine for an old lady.

Yeah, well, she'd probably
blow you for your vote.

What, are you serious?

Oh, damn.

I wish I was old enough to vote.

Man, she's so up my ass

about not embarrassing
the family, you know?

She thinks she's like
a Bush or something.

Okay, well now I can't stop
thinking about her...

Dude, if you say "bush" I swear to god

- I will kick you out of this car right now, man.
- [LAUGHING]

Look man, relax, okay?

I got a cousin who works
at a liquor store.

I can ask him to hook us up
with a keg or something.

Why didn't you say
that in the first place?

'Cause he's an assh*le, that's why.

Yeah, he's not the only
one in your family.

♪ ♪

Got a call about a body?

Oh. [CHUCKLES]

That, yeah.

Sorry to drag you all the way out here.

Just a dead deer.

Female crew, she saw it, freaked out.

I don't know how many times
I told corporate

a drill site ain't no place for a lady.

[LAUGHS]

I'm here, might as well check it out.

Hey, look man.

This misunderstanding, it's
really put us behind schedule,

so can you just work with me here?

I ain't leaving until I see
that thing with my own eyes.

You wanna get back on schedule,
I suggest you get out of my way.

Have at it.

Oh, but you're gonna need this.

A drill site's a dangerous place.

Hate to see anything happen to you.

Appreciate it.

sh*t, I'm gonna have to go down there.

You fellas got a rope or something?

Okay.

[PHONE RINGING]

Yeah?

CAPTAIN PIKE: Turns out
it was a false alarm.

Why don't you head back to the station?

But I haven't seen it yet.
It'll take me minutes.

CAPTAIN PIKE: I just got a call
from the mayor's office.

It's been strongly suggested
that we back off

so that's what we're doing.

I thought you said to leave
the politics out of this.

CAPTAIN PIKE: Just let it go.

Thank you for coming out, Officer.

The people of Mawinhaken sure are lucky

to have you on the force.

It's Detective.

Have yourself a good day... Detective.

Excuse me.

Are you the one who called it in?

A lot of good it did.

Looks like we're both getting sent home.

That depends.

Can you get me down in that hole?

_

_

[CLEARS THROAT]

Why aren't you wearing your g*n?

'Cause I'm going to vote.

Jesus Christ, Trey.

One of the cornerstones of
my campaign is open carry.

You need to be carrying.

In the open.

Between you and Luke it's like
neither of you give a sh*t

about the political future
of this family.

Babe, calm down.

You got nothing to worry about.

You're gonna win.

Nicole says it's close.

The whole town is divided
over this fracking thing.

It was supposed to be a landslide.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Even if you don't win,
I won't love you any less.

Why do you say sh*t like that?

Is that supposed to make me feel better?

Christ.

Mayor.

- Trey.
- Hey, Nicole.

Oh, tell me something good.

The press is here ready to go live.

Let's do this.

I love Mawinhaken.

I was born here.

Raised here.

And god willing, I will die here.

But hopefully not any time soon.

[LAUGHS]

Now I know some of you folks
have some concerns

about Cleargenix coming to town,
but fracking creates jobs.

Jobs this town sorely needs.

And without the money
that drilling brings in

Mawinhaken would be a ghost town.

It's as simple as that.

But the work here isn't done.

I have been proud to serve as your mayor

for the last four years

and I would be honored
to serve you for four more.

Now, if you all will excuse me,
I'm gonna go vote.

[REPORTERS CLAMORING]

Hello, hello.

[TAPS MIC]

Looking good, Jerry.

[EXHALES]

[DOOR SLAMS SHUT]

Somebody there?

[DRIPPING]

If we have rats again...

[DOOR SLAMS]

Son of a bitch!

[STRUGGLING GRUNTS]

[SCREAMS]

_

Um... [CLEARS THROAT]

Uh, these roses are white.

Uh, my-my fiancé, she
specifically asked for...

for cream roses.

I... I know most people
can't tell the difference

but Amy... Amy can tell the difference.

She's very particular.

Um, so I mean, if it's...
if it's not too late

maybe we could just...

Give me a hand?

There's six more of these
in the back of my truck.

S-Shawn, are-are those cream roses?

Yeah, yeah.

I had to drive to Philly
at the cr*ck of dawn.

I was dropping off chairs last night

and I saw all these white roses

and I was like Amy is gonna
flip out so I took care of it.

Wow. Wow, thanks, man.
That's, um, that's huge.

I'm the man of honor.

Somebody's gotta keep our girl
happy, right, buddy?

♪ ♪

_

_

Hey, check it out.

There's Cam.

God. Man, I hate that kid.

Always acting like he's better
than the rest of us.

Bitching about how he can't wait
to get out of this town.

Such a prick.

Man, screw that guy. Forget him.

Check this out.

Hey man, what're you doing?

What're you doing? Luke, what are you...

Luke!

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[LAUGHING]

What the hell, Luke?

Did I scare ya, lawn boy?

I think he crapped his cargo shorts.

[LAUGHING]

See you around, dickhead.

Bye, loser!

[LAUGHING]

[GLASS SHATTERS]

Oh, sh*t!

What're we doing, bro?

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

There he is!

[ALARM WAILS]

Goddammit! Shut it down!

[GROANS] God.

sh*t.

What the hell?

Hey, can we go now?

He's gotta be around here somewhere.

Luke.

Look, forget the window.

Just tell your mom that a rock
hit it or something.

Man, I don't care about the window.

Okay, then why are we here?

Oh, sh*t!

[LAUGHS]

[LAUGHS]

[CLAPS] Nice.

You're joking.

Look at my jacket.

It's good. You look good.

Oh, thanks, d*ck.

Oh my...

Hi. You must be Bobby.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm Lauren.

I'll be taking care of your
grandfather's service today.

Where's Lazlo?

We made all the arrangements
through him.

He had to step out

but I assure you I have
everything under control.

Huh.

I'd like to see my Peepaw
before everyone arrives.

Yeah, of course.

- Just give me a moment.
- Uh-huh.

Lazlo, you assh*le.

Hurry up!

Hey! Hey!

Wha-what're you doing?

They're coming. Just chill.

I sent you home.

♪ ♪

- It's okay. You got this.
- Thanks, honey.

Hi.

Okay. Let's do this.

[CHUCKLES]

Nicole.

What're you doing?

Are you trying to get us busted?

You gotta admit, it's pretty hot.

Your wife is right in the next booth.

If we make too much noise
she'll catch us.

You crazy girl.

Dammit, Lazlo!

This isn't funny!

Come on, come on.

[RINGING]

[PHONE VIBRATING]

[RINGING]

[PHONE VIBRATING]

[RINGING]

Lazlo?

[KNOCKING]

Lazlo?

[GASPS]

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god!!

BOBBY: Uh, lady, people are
starting to show up here.

Okay, I'll be up in a minute.

Damn basement.

Christ.

[MACHINE WHIRRING]

Stop! Hey! I'm still here!

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

Thank you.

Is my husband still in there?

You'd think with his wife on the ballot

it wouldn't be such a tough decision.

[LAUGHS]

Trey?

Christ, Paula, you can't just
open the curtain like that!

It's a violation of my civil rights.

Mayor, we should probably get going.

Let's do it.

♪ ♪

[ENGINE DIES]

Come on.

What the hell is that?

Oh, my god, that's a bone.

f*ck.

[RAGGED BREATHING]

[SCRATCHING SOUNDS]

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMING]

Help!

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[PANICKED BREATHING]

[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ ♪

[SCREAMING]

Uh, ma'am?

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[ENGINE TURNS OVER]

[SPLATTER]

Woo-hoo!

♪ ♪

Woo!

♪ ♪

Oh sh*t, oh sh*t!

[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]

[DISTANT SNARLING]

Uh, hey, yo! You good?

BOBBY: Is something going on down there?

No!

No, you don't.

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[DISTANT SCREAMS] Stop! Stop! No!

What the hell is happening?!

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[VICIOUS SNARLING]

[SNARLING AND GROWLING]

[THUD]

[STRUGGLING GRUNTS]

[SCREAMING]

Die!

You piece!

Of!

sh*t!

[PANTING]

Hey, everyone.

What in the hell did you do
to my Peepaw?

I'm gonna call your boss
and get you fired.

Lauren, you're not gonna believe this.

- The dead...
- Not dead anymore?

[POUNDING]

It's them.

Okay, everybody, follow me.

Come on! Come on!

Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!

Get in the basement!

What is going on?

f*cking zombies!

Zombies?

Just calm down, alright?

We're safe down here.

There's bars on the windows,
the door is bolted,

nothing can get in here.

[DOORS RATTLING]

Unless they're already here.