03x09 - Lip Synching In The Rain

[bunniefuu]

I'm going to be home
late today, mom.

Why? Is it
the chemistry club's
clean your beaker day?

No. It happens
to be buff your
bunsen burner day.

But I'm going to be late
because I'm going out
for the school play.

Oh, that's great,
honey, but, um,

You don't "go out"
for the theater.

You audition.

Go out, audition,
what difference
does it make?

No one ever
picks him anyways.

I think he's got
a great sh*t.

Acting runs
in the family.

I mean, did I ever
tell you that one time
I got curtain calls?

Yeah, yeah.
times.

Ooh. You're doing a play
in school? Which one?

Well, I hope agamemnon
by aeschylus.

You know, I've prepared
an audition monologue
in the original greek.

You mean
the original geek?

Is it the scene where
aegisthus and clytemnestra

Plot against agamemnon
as he returns from troy?

Duh! That's, like,
the best scene.

The best scene!

Guys, guess what?

I just found out
what our school play
is going to be.

High school musical!

Well, it's no agamemnon,
but it's bouncy.

♪here I am in your life ♪

♪here you are in mine ♪

♪yes, we have
a suite life ♪

♪most of the time ♪

♪you and me,
we got the world to see ♪

♪so come on down ♪

♪just me and you
know what to do ♪

♪so come on down ♪

♪it's you and me ♪

♪and me and you ♪

♪we got the whole place
to ourselves ♪

♪you and me,
we got it all for free ♪

♪so come on down ♪

♪this is the suite life ♪

♪we've got a suite life ♪

What role are you
hoping to get?

Sharpay. You know,
a lot of people tell me

I look just like
the girl who plays her.

Really?

Uh-huh.

I don't see it.

Well, she has people
who help her look better.

So...Who are you
auditioning for?

Troy, which in
agamemnon is the city
ruled by king priam,

Besieged for years
by the greeks.

But in this play,
he's a cool dude
with great hair.

I never got a lead role
when I went to our lady
of perpetual sorrow.

Every single christmas,
I was the wise man
who brought myrrh.

What is myrrh, anyway?

I don't even know, ok?

The point is,
I want to get get a part

Where I don't have to
wear a beard.

Zach, what are you
doing here?

I thought you didn't
like theater.

Well, you see,

I bet bob my golf ball
could break
a blackboard.

And?
I won!

So for my detention...

I either had to
work backstage
or clean toilets.

I flipped a coin.

So, maddie, what part
are you trying out for?

Hello? Sharpay!

People say I look
just like her.

Really?
I don't see it.

I'm here.
Hold the applause.

Hi, tony.

It's antonio.

I changed it after
my triumphant turn

As king lear
at peter's puppeteria.

Bet you had to
pull some strings
to get that part.

Funny, right?

Next!

That's me.

Break a leg.
Thanks.

Literally.

I thought for my audition,

I'd do a song by
gilbert and sullivan.

You know any songs
from this century?

Or the previous one?

No.

Then sing.

[clears throat]

♪when I was a lad ♪

♪I served a term as office
boy to an attorney's firm ♪

♪I cleaned the windows,
and I swept the floor ♪

♪and I polished up
the handle of
the big front door ♪

That was very
interesting.

♪I... ♪

♪polished that handle
so carefully ♪

♪that now I am the ruler
of the queen's navy ♪

[latin dance music playing]

♪yeah, we're gonna
bop, bop, bop ♪

♪bop to the top ♪

♪wipe away
your inhibitions ♪

♪stomp, stomp, stomp
to the romp ♪

♪and strut your stuff ♪

That--that's good.
I've heard enough.

[music ends]

That was
really great.

And everyone says
I look exactly like sharpay.

Really?
Yeah.

I don't see it.

I'm here!
Prepare to be dazzled.

Excuse me,
but I work alone.

[folk music playing]

♪london tipton's
really great ♪

♪really great,
really great ♪

♪london tipton's
really great ♪

♪and deserves
a bit of cake ♪

Flit and flounce!

Wow, um, thanks.

Ooh! You want more?
There are more verses.

Are they different?

Ooh! In verse ,

There's an extra
"really" in it.

Well, that's
really, really great.

Next!
Ooh! That's me.

Hit it, louie.

[show music playing]

♪I've got beef
between my teeth ♪

♪it would be boss ♪

♪if I had floss ♪

This is from
my unproduced musical,
floss.

Is it? I found it
on the internet
and thought it was genius.

Finally someone sees it.
Well, sing, boy, sing!

♪the stick is stuck ♪

♪I'm out of luck ♪

♪I'm at a loss ♪

♪without my floss ♪

♪I can't eat a lentil ♪

♪without dental floss ♪

That was beautiful.

The audition results
are on the school web site.

I can't look.
Cody, you do it.

Yes! Fantastic.

I'm sharpay?

No, I got the part
of troy.

Who cares?

Yes! I'm sharpay's
understudy.

Understudy?!

I can't believe it.

I wanted this part
more than anything.
How could I not get it?

Hey, guys. Great news.

I'm playing shar-pee.

Sharpay!

She got my part,
and she can't even
pronounce the name.

Who cares
what her name is?

I'm just happy to be in
musical high school.

Aargh!

I can't believe
I'm an understudy.
It's insulting.

I might as well be
a lousy stagehand.

Heh heh.

No offense.

None taken.

I think
this whole thing is lame!

I just just don't
understand why
london got my part.

I can sing,
I can dance, I can act--

Can you work
a power painter?

Mr. Blaine?
Yeah.

Sorry to bother you,
but I was just wondering

Why I didn't get
the part of sharpay.

Um, look, maddie.

You're
a great singer, but...

You're just too nice
to play the role of sharpay.

I mean, she has got to be
really mean.

I can be mean.

Sometimes, when I give
sandwiches to the poor...

[whispers]
I don't cut off the crusts.

Oh.

Ooh. You are
motorcycle-g*ng
material.

Oh, yeah. Grr!

Ok. London, antonio,

Let's take it
from the top, please.

Top of what?

That means
the beginning.

Of the song.

Oh. Heh heh.
Amateur.

[gasps]
mr. Blaine,

Antonio called me
a bad word.

I'm sure he did, sweetheart.
And music!

[latin dance music playing]

♪I believe in dreaming ♪

♪sh**ting for the stars ♪

♪baby,
to be number one ♪

♪you've got to
raise the bar ♪

♪kicking and scratching ♪

♪grinding out my best ♪

♪anything it takes
to climb ♪

Both: ?the ladder of success ?

Mr. Blaine:
Ok, ok, ok, let's
stop, please!

Stop.
[music ends]

Good. I need
a spring water.

Aw, come on.
Spray, you stupid sprayer!

Maddie, can you hold this?

I'm going to find
the instructions.

Great, great job,
london.

Uh, but to be
even greater,

You may want to consider
singing lessons.

Well, if you think
they'd help--

And dancing lessons.

How could she have
gotten this part over me?

Don't you read
teen theater magazine?

London's father
is financing a broadway run

Of mr. Blaine's play
floss.

This is so unfair.

I can't believe that
london gets everything
just because she's rich.

Oh, mr. Blaine...

My dressing-room
mirror's broken.

It doesn't tell me
how beautiful I am

Like the one
I have at home does.

Uh, carl?

Go stand in
london's dressing room

And tell her
how beautiful she is.

That's it!
Ok, no more miss nice gal.

I'm gonna
tell london the truth

No matter
how much it hurts her.

[sighs]
I love the theater
when it gets catty.

Ohh, maddie!
Did you see?

I'm great!
Ha! Great?

The only reason
why you got that part

Was because
your daddy bought it for you.

I can't believe it.

Yeah, well,
it's the truth.

That is so sweet of him.
I have to go thank him.

Unh!

Oh!

Oh. Can you show me
how to do that?

Guys, I've told you

No playing
basketball inside.

I'm not. I'm rehearsing.

Ok. No rehearsing
basketball inside.

Mom, I'm a method actor.

And since I'm playing a jock,
I've decided to
live the role / .

And even that
isn't gonna be enough time.

Not true.

I think I'm getting
athlete's foot.

Well, so far,
that's the only athletic
thing about you.

I've been practicing,

And I'm starting to
look like a real b-baller.

♪ice cream, ice cream
cherries on top ♪

♪how many girlfriends
do I got♪ ♪

Well, if you
keep that up...None.

My ball! My ball!

I--I mean...Ahem.
Give me back the rock.

That was
very believable, honey.

Carey,

My drama teacher
thinks I could use

A teensy-weensy
bit of help with
my singing.

Oh, I'd be happy to help.
Thanks.

Do you know
any good singers?

London, I happen to be
a professional singer.

I sing in the lounge
every night.

I thought that was karaoke
and you hogged the mic.

Now, learning how to
sing a song is easy

If you can handle
a scale.

No problem.

You just step on it,
then subtract pounds.

Sweetie, no,
not that kind of scale--

A musical scale. Here.

Sing this.
[plays pitch pipe]

♪do, re, mi, fa,
so, la, ti, do ♪

How am I supposed to
remember all that?

Well, uh,
you could, um,

You could try thinking of
things that remind you
of each note.

Uh...
[plays pitch pipe]

?do ?
oh, that's easy.

"dough" means money!

Ok. Well,
let's keep going.

♪re, mi ♪

Yay, me!

♪fa, so ♪

If something's far,
I say, "so?"

Because I have
a private jet.

♪la ♪

"law" is something
you get to break
if you're rich.

♪ti ♪

My favorite vowel!

♪do ♪

Yay! More money!

Ok. Now let's try
putting it all together.

Do, yay, me! Far, so?
La, ti, do!

[shatters]

Oh, mazel tov!

What was
that terrible noise?

I was singing.

Not that noise.

The--the other noise
that someone else was making

That drowned out
your wonderful singing.

Nice save.

London, shall we get
this dance lesson started?

I want you to get
your money's worth.

How much
is she paying you?

diamonds an hour.

I'm only getting .
I got robbed.

Hey, are we gonna dance
or what?

Yes, yes. Now, london,
a good dancer...

Dances from his soul.

See? Like this.

Step, step, kick.

And shimmy, shimmy,
shimmy, shimmy.

, , boogie.

And shorty george,

Shorty george.

Fishtail, fishtail.

And crazy legs,

Crazy legs.

Jazz square,
jazz square.

And big finish!

I can do that.

Shimmy, shimmy,
kick, kick,

Crazy--
[crash]

You're a natural.

Your dancing shoe?

Ok, people,
it's opening night.

We have to practice
all of our numbers.

Ooh! Let's start with
number .

It looks hard,
but you just draw a snowman.

See?

I meant
musical numbers.

Places!

Lower the gym set.

Got it.
[squeaking]

That's a pirate ship.

Argh! Heh.

While we wait for
captain schnook,

Let's do
bop to the top.

And music.

[latin dance music playing]

Mucho gusto.

Ay, que fabulosa.

Ow! Stop!

[music ends]
that is it.

I'm taking .

Ooh! Me, too.
How much time do we have?

Antonio, antonio,

Come here--
please, please, please.

Just relax and breathe, ok?
[breathes deeply]

I will not risk
my professional
reputation

Performing with
that amateur.

I have talent scouts
coming to see me,

And london is bopping me
right to the bottom.

Wait, wait, wait.

You have talent scouts
coming?
Yes.

Ok. I think
antonio's right.

As captain of this team,

I think we should
bench london.

Students:
Yeah. Definitely.

So, we all agree
that london stinks

Like a dead fish
on a city bus.

[students chuckle]

London: Is that
what you think of me?

That I stink?
[gasps]

And take the bus?

You know,

Why don't you just
give maddie the role?
She deserves it.

No, no, no,
absolutely not.

There is no way that
I am taking london
out of this production.

Not if I want to
see floss on broadway.

But, if I'm as rotten
as everyone says--

Oh, you are. What you do
should be classified

As a capital crime
in all states

And puerto rico.

I don't want to embarrass
myself in front of daddy.

Um, daddy?

Yeah. He's coming
to the show tonight.

D-daddy's coming?

T-to see you be good?
Yeah.

[all gasp]

Anyone have
any smelling salts?

Well, I got
an old gym sock
in my locker.

I'm ok. I'm ok.

So, what are we
gonna do?

That's--that's
a good question. Um...

I got it.

We'll do
singing in the rain.

We have to learn
a whole new musical?
I barely know this one.

We'll do what they did
in the movie
singing in the rain.

You'll lip-sync...
While maddie

Is behind the curtain
doing the actual singing.

That's
a brilliant idea.

What's so brilliant
about it?

I do all the work,
and you get all the credit?

Yeah, that's
the brilliant part.

Look, I'm sick of
being nice.

Look where it's gotten me.
I won't do it.

Students:
Come on, maddie. Do it.

Maddie, please?

Look, I know
you really deserve this part.

But daddy has never been
to a single one of
my school performances.

In kindergarten,
when I played a raindrop
in the itsy bitsy spider,

I looked down
into the audience

Where all the other raindrops'
daddies were.

And he wasn't there.
He sent the butler instead,

And not even the good one.

You had a bad butler?

Everyone does.
Ask around.

What?
What?

Come on, maddie.
Pretty please

With caviar on top?

Students: Please? Come on.

Ok, ok, fine.

But I'm not just
doing it for you.

I'm doing it for
all my fellow actors
who never caught a break

In this topsy-turvy
world we call show--

Save your voice.
I want to sound good.

It's going just like
I wrote it. Perfect.

Hey! Good job, cody.

You know, you even kinda
look like zac efron.

And I don't look
like ashley tisdale?

You people are
all crazy!

What key?

We had our rehearsal pianist
do an arrangement.

Pblffft. Pblffft.
Pblffft.

Mr. Tipton.
Yes, moseby?

When you see
london's dancing,

It may look a bit
rough and unrehearsed.

Well, that's just
the style these days.

Bad singing--
that's also the style.

Or really great singing.

I taught her everything
she knows, sir.

I taught her
crazy legs, sir.

I am so proud of you.

Now tell me. Does your
father look happy?

Yep. I got a thumbs-up from
daddy and his bodyguards.

Oh, joy. It's working.

You know, maddie
is doing all the work.

Nuh-uh. Moving
your lips is work.

No, maddie
should probably--

Zip it, mister.
Not another word,

Or I'm putting you
on that pirate ship.

Ok, maddie.
Are we ready to bop
to the top?

'cause remember,
we're all in this
together.

Ok, you're pushing
it to the limit.

Sorry.

[latin dance music playing]

Mucho gusto.

Ay, que fabulosa.

[trills]
ay, ay, ay.

Arrrrrriba.

Quieres bailar?

Quiero puke.

♪I believe in dreamin' ♪

♪sh**ting for the stars ♪

♪baby to be number one ♪

♪you've got to
raise the bar ♪

Cody, help me show everyone
it's maddie singing.

♪grindin' out my best ♪

♪anything it takes
to find ♪

Don't pull
that one! Oh!

♪work our tails off
every day ♪

Get up!
The show must go on.

Not with me.

But we can't do
this number without you.

Yes, we can.

Caliente!

♪yeah, we're gonna
bop, bop, bop,
bop to the top ♪

♪slip and slide
and ride that rhythm ♪

♪jump and pop,
hop till we drop ♪

?and start again ?
sing!

♪zip zap zop,
flop like a mop ♪

I don't want to
embarrass myself
in front of daddy.

Sing!

♪move it to the groove
till the music stops ♪

♪do the bop, bop, bop ♪

They're very good.
They--they love it!

They're supposed
to love me.

♪bop to the top ♪

♪gimmie, gimmie,
shimmy, shimmy ♪

♪shake some booty
and turn around ♪

♪flash a smile
in their direction ♪

♪show some muscle ♪

♪do the hustle ♪

♪yeah, we're gonna
bop, bop, bop ♪

♪bop to the top ♪

♪wipe away your inhibitions ♪

♪stomp, stomp, stomp,
do the romp ♪

♪and strut your stuff ♪

♪bop, bop, bop,
straight to the top ♪

♪going for the glory ♪

♪we'll keep stepping up,
and we just won't stop ♪

♪till we reach the top ♪

♪bop to the top ♪

[cheers and applause]

See? Your dad
is proud of you.

I told you
you can do it.

Wow, maddie,
you really are nice.

No wonder you didn't
get the role of sharpay.

Way to go, maddie.

, , , ...

[show music playing]

♪I've got beef
between my teeth ♪

♪it would be boss ♪

♪if I had floss ♪

That's what I like
to see.

Let's try it again, ok?
Ready?

, , , ...

♪the stick is stuck,
I'm out of luck ♪

♪I'm at a loss ♪

♪without my floss ♪

Now we're gettin' it.

One more time.
Here we go.

, --ah, forget it.