03x05 - Meet the McKrupnicks

[bunniefuu]

I can't believe I'm spending
my vacation at the Animal Park

sitting behind an elephant waiting for
him to pass the Zoo Director's cellphone.

Ugh!

It could be worse.

Oh, it is. I have to
call him when I find it.

Milton's so lucky. He gets to
go to Scotland with his parents.

Oh, no, he's not going anymore.
His dad had some work thing come up.

[Bagpipes playing]

What is that awful sound?

Sounds like a dying donkey.

Takes people years to learn
how to play one of these things.

[Music stops]

Suckers!

- What's with the vacuum cleaner?
- They're bagpipes.

[Scottish accent] The traditional
instrument of my mother country Scotland.

I thought you weren't going?

I wasn't but the first class
tickets were non-refundable.

So I convinced my parents
to let me turn them into...

Five coach tickets.

Which means we're all going to Scotland!

All: We're going to Scotland!

Oh, I've always wanted to
learn how to play the bagpipes.

We're staying with my
grandfather at our family Castle.

And we can even wear kilts!

- What's a kilt?
- It's like a skirt for men.

I'm in.

[Blows]

Hey, Jack, I think you're
blowing too much air into that.

No, I'm trying to build up
the pressure. It's all clogged.

[Inhales, blows]

[Plays note] [Pops loudly]

Sorry.

[Rock music playing]

- ♪ Don't...
- ♪Don't...

- ♪You...
- ♪You...

♪Get all tough with me!

♪I'm saying...

- ♪Won't...
- ♪Won't...

- ♪You...
- ♪You...

♪Come kick it with me?

♪And we could have a
ball, run up the wall!

♪That's just how we do.

♪And no matter how much I chop and punch
it's not as cool as kickin' it with you.

♪Here we go, let's start the party!

♪Chop it up like it's karate.

♪Everybody!

- ♪Don't...
- ♪ Don't...

- ♪You...
- ♪You...

♪Get all tough with me!

♪I'm saying...

- ♪ Won't...
- ♪Won't...

- ♪You...
- ♪You...

♪Come kick it with me?

♪And we could have a
ball, run up the wall!

♪That's just how we do.

♪And no matter how much I chop and punch
it's not as cool as kickin' it with you.

Thank you for picking us up from
the airport, grandpa McKrupnick.

We could have taken a cab.

No! Then we would have missed the
eight-hour ride in the manure wagon.

You're here at an exciting time.

Tonight we have the banquet.

And tomorrow...

We start the great games!

[Laughs]

- What's that smell?
- [Gasps]

Grandma's made her famous snouts.

[Gasps]

Ooh!

Mmm. I'll say it. This is
the best snout I've ever had.

- So what are the great games?
- Well...

They're a friendly competition between
the McKrupnicks and the McCrarys...

They only other clan in the valley.

It's to commemorate the end of
the feud between our two families.

- Why were you feuding?
- Ooh, never ask that question!

We swore to never ever speak
about the incident again!

- I'm sorry. I won't ever...
- 'Twas a foggy night...

Many generations ago...

When the Devil's own Fergus
McCrary came on our land!

And he stole our only donkey!

[Gasps]

But years ago,
we finally made peace.

Mm-hmm.

Guys, I still can't believe
we're at a real Castle.

The McKrupnicks have lived
here for over years.

And that handmade
stained glass window...

Tells the entire history
of the McKrupnick clan.

It's easily our most
valuable piece of...

- [Glass shatters]
- [Screams]

I told you kids not
to play ball out there!

Yo, grandpa McMuffler...

Where's the Loch Ness place
where the monster lives?

Jerry, I've told you it was just a story
that was made up to bring in tourists.

Oh, no no! I've seen
Nessy with my own eyes.

It was on a night just like this.

In the lake...

- Behind our Castle.
- Wha...?

Rudy, do you realize how much money
we can make if we get a picture of her?

Oh, please. You don't really believe
in that thing, do you? [Chuckles]

Get your camera. Meet me
in the boat in five minutes.

Okay.

Why did you make up that story?
Everyone knows Nessy isn't real.

Well, I had to get rid of them.

That Rudy's a wrecking ball!

And the other one, he's gonna
be tootin' snouts all night.

Dude! Dude dude dude.

Ah, I see Nessy.

Oh, beady eyes, scaly skin.

Man, she is ugly!

You're looking at me.

Give me those!

We've been looking for Nessy for hours.

Let's try a different part of the lake.

[Sighs]

Stupid motor won't turn over.

Give me that hammer.
I'll get it started.

Okay, here.

[Motor turns over, squeaks]

[Water splashes]

Told you I'd get it started.

Look under the bench and see
if you can find some paddles.

[Groans]

Hmm, let's see.

Food.

Water.

Flares.

Ah, spare engine.

Ah!

Uh, no paddles.

That's it!

[Screams]

Rudy Rudy! Chill.

You're gonna tip the boat over!

You're right.

[Clinks loudly]

On the eve of the great games, I'd
like to welcome everyone to this feast.

Celebrating the peace
between the two families.

- The McKrupnicks...
- [Cheers]

- And the McCrarys.
- [Loud cheers]

Hey, who's this big guy over here?

Oh, that's Angus McCrary, the
strongest McCrary of them all.

Yeah, he looks pretty big, but
sometimes size has nothing to do with...

Oh, yeah, no, he's ridiculously strong.

Guys, we're in Scotland, okay?

Let's get out there and have
some fun. [Bagpipes playing]

Dance.

Oh, uh, I'm good, thanks.
I'm not much of a...

- Wasn't a question.
- Whoa!

Rudy, you think we'll
ever get to see Nessy?

If we see her, I am
eating her. I am starving!

I don't think there's
any fish down there.

Yo, Rudy!

Rudy, check it out. Look.

There's a fish out there.

What's in your mouth?

Nothing.

You've been eating cookies.

You disgust me!

Rudy, I'm sorry.

I don't want something as stupid
as a cookie to come between us.

No!

That's it!

[Bagpipes playing]

[Music stops] I'd like to
thank the McCrarys for coming.

[Loud cheers]

And I'd also like to
acknowledge my grandson.

And his friends who
came all the way here...

If I could just say a few words here.

What a special evening.

Two families coming together
and forgetting their differences.

[All cheer]

And to think, it all
started over a donkey.

[All laugh]

A donkey that was stolen
from us by a McCrary.

[McCrarys gasp]

How dare you!

We did not steal your donkey.

It belonged to us.

Uh, I think what's important here is...

How can it be your
donkey if we owned it?

- Uh, you know, since...
- You cannot own a stolen donkey!

That is a very sound legal position...

The feud is back on.

No no no no no. Not the feud.

We can't have another
hundred years of fighting.

The boy's right.

- Indeed he is.
- Of course I am.

So whichever family loses the games
shall be banished from the valley forever!

What?! Who banishes
anymore? That's so s...

I will see you on the field of battle!

- Aye!
- Aye!

I really gotta learn to shut my yapper.

Guys, this is all my
fault. What am I gonna do?

There's nothing you can do. Your
family's giving up and running away.

Krupnicks aren't really
built for running.

What we do is more of a brisk mosey.

I've gotta try something.

[Sighs deeply]

McKrupnicks, listen up.

Oh!

Blabby McBlab-blab
has something to say!

I'm not giving up our
Castle without a fight.

I'll go face the McCrarys
alone if I have to.

- Even Angus.
- [Scoffs]

He won't be alone.

I'll be with him.

And I'll be with him too.

Why would you fight for our family?

Because Milton's more than our friend.

He's our family.

You know, like that weird cousin
who you know will never get married.

Thanks for that, Kim.

You three have the hearts of Lions.

And I'm proud to consider you my family.

McKrupnicks...

Raise your swords.

To honor.

To courage.

To victory!

[Fabric rips]

I ripped my little skirt off, didn't I?

The McCrarys are here for battle.

[Loud cheers]

The McKrupnicks are here for battle.

[Loud cheers]

[Stake thuds]

I seem to have found a hard patch here.

[Milton straining]

Here for battle!

[Cheers]

- [Stake thuds]
- [Groans]

Here for battle!

[Weak cheers]

Got it!

Oh.

Thanks.

[Horn blows loudly]

All right, Kim. This is your event.

The Castle door flip.
It's a test of strength.

That Castle door weighs over pounds.

Lift it and flip it
over. Just watch Megan.

Just so you know, Jack, I have
full intentions of hugging you.

Ha. Well, thanks, but
I'm not much of a huger.

Oh, don't worry.

I'll do all the work.

[Cheers]

You know, uh, that
door looks kinda heavy.

- You really think I can do this?
- Sure you can.

You have a lower center of gravity.

It's all mind over matter.
Come on, you're a black belt.

You know what?

You're right.

[Exhales] Okay.

All right, Kim. Come
on, Kim. You can do this.

Lift with your legs, come on.

[Straining]

- Come on.
- Here we go, here we go.

You're doing well, you're doing well.

Lift lift lift lift!

[Groaning]

Yes yes!

- She's getting it!
- [Cheers]

- Yes!
- [Loud thud]

Kim: Did I win?

- You all right there, Kim?
- Yeah, I think so, why?

Oh, I don't know.

You're looking a little pancake-ish.

You've been staring at
me like that all night.

What are you thinking about?

Oh.

Nothing.

I don't like the way
you're looking at me.

What are you thinking about?

Nothing.

I can't take it anymore.
You look delicious!

[Yelping]

Huh! Look at that.

We did have a paddle.

This is the chop and climb.

Using nothing but two climbing
axes, you race to the top.

First one to ring the bell wins.

This is all upper body strength,
Jack. You should be good at this.

I got this.

Hey, uh, I hear you're pretty good.

[Scoffs]

Check this out.

Yeah, not very impressive.

[Blows lightly]

Ah, see, now that is impressive.

[All cheering]

[Horn blows]

[McKrupnicks gasp]

[Body thuds]

[Cheers]

Yes!

Come on down, Jack.

I got a victory prize for you.

Uh, I'm good, Megan. I'm just gonna
stay up here and enjoy the view.

[Chuckles nervously]

All right, I'll just
wait down here for you.

Quiet as a wee church mouse.

Whoa!

Ah, look who came down to see me.

Uh... no.

♪ Kickin' it with you!

Hey, Jerry.

You know how the Wasabi code
tells us to never say "die".

Yeah. I love that message.

[Weakly] It's time to say die.

Oh, Jerry, I'm gonna miss you.

[Voice breaking] Me too.

[Both sobbing]

Quit your blubbering!

You're scaring me clams.

Rudy!

Rudy, we're in like three feet of water.

It's not deep at all.

- We're gonna live?
- Yeah.

We're gonna live!

- We're gonna live!
- [Laughing]

Let's never fall for
something like that again.

Absolutely!

[Scoffs]

Loch Ness Monster. [Chuckles]

Did you two hear?

They spotted the Scottish
Sasquatch in the piney forest.

Right over there.

[Chuckles] Yeah, like
we're gonna fall for that.

Scottish Sasquatch.

[High-pitched] Okay.

Well, I can finally get
back to me clamming in peace.

All right, it's all tied up. It's up
to Milton, how does this event work?

Milton just has to get that -pound
boulder across the line faster than Angus!

I'm gonna go finish packing.

Look, Milton, we gave it our best sh*t.

- Hang on.
- Let it go, buddy. It's over.

Hang on, hang on.

No, it's not. I can do
this. I can b*at Angus.

The rules don't say I
have to carry the boulder.

I just have to get it
across the finish line.

And that helps because...

Because of physics.

There's a six-degree
slope to the field,

so if I can get the
boulder off the pedestal,

inertia will carry it
across the finish line.

You know what the number
one law in physics is.

You know I don't.

An object in motion
tends to stay in motion.

- Both: Oh.
- Yeah! So you understand?

- No.
- Not even a little.

Boys, take your positions.

[Mouthing]

Good luck, little man.

Oh. Good luck to you too, Angus.

[Horn blows]

[All cheering]

Kim: Let's go, Milton.

It's too heavy. He can't move it.

Wait. I think he's
doing it. It's moving!

Yeah!

[Cheers]

[Angus groans]

- Go go!
- Go!

Come on, Angus!

Get up! Get up, you big ox! Get up!

Push it! Push it, you beanpole!

Jack: He can't get up.
The boulder's on his leg.

Megan: Come on, Angus!

Get up! Get up!

- Grandpa: Push it!
- Jack: Push! It's right there, push!

- Come on!
- Push!

- Come on, Milton, go!
- Push it, Milton!

- Push! Push!
- You're almost there!

- What's he doing?
- I don't know.

[Both straining]

Come, McKrupnick. We'll
cross the line together.

But there can only be one winner.

We cross together or
I don't cross at all.

The McKrupnicks have
to leave the valley!

No! They're not going anywhere!

I couldn't have done
it without a McKrupnick.

Milton and I both won.

That's the way it should be.

Our two families are stronger
together than we are apart.

The boys are right.

Any bad blood between us
should be buried forever.

Let's start right now.

Would you like come with
me to a show tomorrow night?

I have tickets for Lady Gaga!

[Screaming]

- The Gaga!
- Yeah!

I love The Gaga!

All right, Megan.

Bring it in.

You had your chance, pretty boy.

I found someone else I like better.

♪ Kickin' it with you!

How'd you get those snouts past customs?

Oh, I hid them in my
shorts. You want one?

Wow, Rudy.

You really like wearing
that skirt, don't you?

For the thousandth
time, it's not a skirt.

This kilt is like the
manliest thing you can wear.

It's been worn by
Kings, Knights, Warriors.

I'm gonna go eat my pizza out
in the courtyard and show it off.

Wow, look at the way
he's strutting around.

[Leaf blower whirring]

Do you think he sees the
guy with the leaf blower?

[Crowd screaming]

Nope! Didn't see him.