03x17 - Chapter Sixty-One

[bunniefuu]

Okay, people,
you recall we last left our Jane

crushing on Fabian, and, guess what,

the feeling was mutual.

Yeah, quite a kiss.

The kind of kiss you can't wait

to tell your best friend about.

In Jane's case, that would be Lina,

although we haven't
seen her lately. Hmm.

Anyway, also feeling lovey-dovey...
Ro and Xo,

because they recently got back together.

And they weren't the only ones.

Remember Rafael and
Petra's night of passion?

Well, after,

Rafael started having feelings for her.

Unfortunately,
Petra was dating Chuck Chesser,

the owner of the hotel next door.

And trust me,
there was a lot of drama there,

because a body was found right
between their properties.

Yep, it was Scott.

You remember Scott, right?

- Sort of annoying, kept a burn book,

- always blackmailing people.

- _
- Married to Petra's twin sister, Anezka.


Anyway, fast-forward three years.

He's dead,
and Anezka was arrested for his m*rder.

And Petra was freaking out because...

You better fix this,

or I will tell them all that I know,

and then you, sister,
will be in orange jumpsuit with me.

I know, straight out of

a Telenovela, right?

Which this is, after all.

When Jane Gloriana Villanueva

was years old,

she went on her very first date.

Well, double date.


Kiss him.

I don't think he likes me.

See?

People can surprise you.

I never said it was going
to be a good surprise.

Nope.

No way this was going to
be Jane's first kiss...

The one she dreamed about forever.

- _ It's gonna be my first fling.

Fabian is perfect fling material.


I'm definitely not into dating him,

but, oh,
he is the hottest guy I have ever seen.

Yeah, it's kind of hard
to say no to that body.

Are they sh**ting the
tighty-whities scene?

How did you know that?

I saw it on Dad's script

and made a mental note in my sex brain.

Wow, you are really ready for this.

Totally ready. He's perfect.

- Cut!
- Okay, I got to go.

Your dad and I are gonna grab lunch.

Wait. I miss you.

Maybe we can have dinner tonight.

But tonight is Fabian fling night.

Exactly.

I'm meeting him at :

to Netflix and chill,

- so that means...
- Sex.

I know. I'm not your Abuela.

I'll come over for dinner.

See you tonight.

Lina?

Jane!

Uh... I didn't know you were in town.

Yeah, it was a last-minute trip.

Two days to do some wedding stuff.

Right. Yeah.

I was literally about to text you.

- Oh.
- Ju... Yeah.

Well, here I am.

Surprise!

- So let's see the ring.
- Yeah.

I should explain.

These two haven't seen each
other in quite a while.

Almost two years, to be exact.

And in that time,
a lot has changed for Lina.

Yeah, that's been their
main source of communication

ever since Lina moved away.

Oh, wow,

- it's even better in person.
- Thank you.

I was literally about to text you.

Yeah, you said that already.

So sad, right?

These two were like sisters.

No, sister, I didn't k*ll Scott!

Like regular sisters, I meant,

not like these two.

I loved him. You know that.

So you better fix this,
or I will tell everyone

that you were in his
apartment that night,

and you stole his burn book.

I was only in his apartment
to get your clothes,

because you asked me to.

I didn't know he was dead.

Maybe you did this.

Maybe you k*lled him.

You always hated him.

That's ridiculous. Stop it.

Did you do it?

Of course not. I-I loved him.

Then why did you thr*aten him?

The police say they have a video.

Apparently a guest sent it to them.

What?

Yeah, I've seen the video.

It's pretty bad.

No. I hate you!

I wish you were dead.
Never come near me again!

Did you k*ll him?

No!

No, I couldn't have...

I don't think.

Okay, we have to go over everything

that happened that day...
Everything you can remember.

You guys were in a fight?

Yes, yes, he was
flirting with a waitress.

I got very jealous. Scott was mad.

He hated when I would get jealous,

but I can't help it.

In the orphanage, you always have to

look out for your bread
and your boyfriend.

That night, Anezka...

Yes, I... I got a text.

He was breaking up with me.

I texted him back...

But he said no.

And that's when you found me.

Oh, no,

you poor thing.

Let me help you.

I could get you out on
the first flight tomorrow.

I'll pack up your things.

That way you don't have
to see Scott again.

- No...
- No, no, really, it's...

it's not a problem.

You should just go.

And then we be going
back to your penthouse,

and I be drinking my sorrows away.

And that's all I remember.

I fall asleep on couch.

Well, you're on a video,

so you must have gone back out

after I went back to work.

I was so drunk, I can't remember.

But no, I couldn't have k*lled him.

No, I loved him.

Oh, you know how much I loved him.

Please, beautiful sister,
you have to fix this.

I want to fix it, of course,

but I just can't believe
Lina came back to Miami

and didn't call me.

Yeah, Oprah and Gayle went
through something like this.

A few years ago, Oprah was super busy

launching the Oxygen network, and Gayle

was really feeling it, so I suggested

they spend some quality time together

at Colonial House.

One night was all they needed

to get their friendship back on track.

Would you and Lina be open
to something like that?

Thanks, Dad,
but I think I'll just talk to her.

Can somebody wipe me?

Pass.

Fine.

I'm sorry, I know it was just
supposed to be the two of us.

Oh, no need to apologize.

I'm just glad you two are so happy.

We are.

But do you think we're moving too fast?

Do you?

I-I don't know. Maybe.

So talk to Dad about it.

I want to, but every time I try,

we just end up having sex.

Yeah... oh, didn't need to know that.

And just try again.

I mean, you can wait five minutes.

Ha. Speaking of sex,

I have to go get dressed.

So she can get undressed.

That's right,
it's almost time to Netflix and chill.

You know that this was
based on a true story.

There really was a Queen Elizabeth.

Is. There still is one.

Hmm?

Doesn't matter.

You know, I actually was hoping that

maybe tonight we could do
a little less Netflixing

and a little more chilling.

Mm, stop. We should stop.

Why?

Well, I'm, um, sort of saving myself.

Surprise.

You're a virgin?

No, no. I've had sex.

Oh. Lots of sex. All kinds of sex.

Monogamous sex, freaky sex,

kinky sex, hate sex,

love/hate sex, ex sex, fan sex,

cougar sex, Halloween sex...

Okay, I get it.

But after a while,
it just became meaningless.

So I decided no more.

I'm gonna wait.

Mm... until it's...?

A meaningful commitment.

Maybe even marriage.

Got it. That's so cool.

Brr. Is it me, or did it get

pretty Netflix and chilly in here?

Seriously, how did I find
the one Telenovela sex symbol

that doesn't want a fling?

It's not funny, Mom.

Good morning.

Mom, I got to go.

Abuela, you know the rules.

Only minutes of newspapers a day,

and never alone in your room.

Yes, things are bad, I know.

You should march with me.

Oh, I know something
that'll cheer you up.

Fabian won't have sex with me

because he's re-virginized himself.

I-I don't know, we didn't get that far.

I was so surprised.

Anyway, I'm gonna end it.

What?

No.

It's because we have nothing in common.

And where did you learn that term?

Me?

We just want different things.

Aw, just look at him, Jane.

If you don't give him a chance, I will.

Hey.

Oh, hey. Mateo was just teaching me

the proper way to ride an ant.

You have to hold on to his antenna.

- Like this.
- Ah.

Oh, well, I hate to break up the party,

but it's time to go home.

So go say bye to Papa.

Mwah.

Don't worry, I introduced myself
as Rogelio's friend, not yours.

I know how important it is
to have boundaries with kids.

I have a little niece,

and she's my very best friend.

See?

Geez, Jane, puppies.

What else does the guy need to do?

He's perfect.

So when are we getting together again?

I'm-I'm glad you asked.

Uh, sometimes when women hear
that I don't want to have sex,

they don't want to see me again.

You're kidding. Ugh,
people are the worst.

Fabian, we're ready for
you in the dining room set.

Okay. Well, I'll text
you after I'm finished

climbing the giant candelabra.

Okay.

Eyes up, Jane.

I know that look.

And I know that look, too.

It's piney Rafael.

I haven't seen him in years.

I'll see you soon.

- Take care.
- Bye.

Who was that?

Mm, the lawyer I hired
to represent Anezka.

You're helping your sister?

The same woman who paralyzed you

and tried to steal your life?

Okay, yes, Anezka did
some horrible things,

but she's no m*rder*r.

Oof, that's a pretty low bar there.

Besides, she would have
never k*lled Scott.

She loved him for...

whatever reason.

That might be true.

But that's not why you're helping her.

Fine.

Also...

it might be me in that video

threatening to k*ll Scott.

Some of you might find this surprising.

I knew it as soon as I saw it.

I have a lot of experience with twins.

Petra and Anezka look
nothing alike to me.

I just wanted them to end
their ridiculous relationship

and get Anezka to leave.

Tell me what happened.

Everything.

I'd had enough, so I fired him.

Effective immediately.

Are you forgetting I have Emilio's will?

Rafael told his sister,
you idiot, it's meaningless.

Now hand over your work
phone and get out of here.

Then I texted Anezka from his phone

and ended their relationship.

Later that night,
I slipped a little something

in Anezka's drink just
to help her sleep.

Also known as drugging her.

And then I made it clear to Scott

that Anezka didn't want
to be with him anymore.

No! I hate you!

I wish you were dead!
Never come near me again!

My plan would've worked perfectly.

Except then Scott had to
go die and ruin everything.

May he rest in peace.

So you've been lying to
the police this whole time?

I mean... high-level, yes,

but it only became relevant
when they ruled it a m*rder.

Look, I kept the truth from you

because I didn't want to
ask you to lie for me,

not when you're on probation.

Okay,

wipe that dopey look off your face.

She said she doesn't want
you to go back to jail,

not have another baby with you.

I just need them to stop
focusing on my sister.

She couldn't have k*lled him,
she was drugged in my penthouse.

It must've been someone else.

I have a P.I. I'll put him on it.

Hey, babe.

Ready for lunch?

Yes, great.

I'm telling you,

that pretty boy wants
to get in them shorts.

Oh, stop. You're being ridiculous.

He's not. I know the look.

Yup. There it is again.

Come on, Jane, you can do this.

- Remember, sex is off the table.
- All righty, mateys!

Something to nibble
as your night begins.

That pirate reminds me of the time

that my sister convinced me...

Oh, come on, Jane,

that's so not sexy.

And I love nachos.

Well, you're a mom, what do you think?

Hmm? What? Yeah.

Um... I completely agree.

You agree that I'm going
to Mexico next month?

Maybe.

Come, Jane. What's on your mind?

_

Think of something, quick, Jane!

Lina. My best friend Lina is in town...

and things are awkward.

Okay, this is just ridiculous.

Wiping your nose is never cute.

Oh.

Perhaps I spoke too soon.

Oh, right on time.

And I pushed back our dinner
so we can make love first.

Well, can we actually just...

talk?

And I love you and want to be with you,

but I just don't want to
make the same mistakes again.

I don't either, trust me.

And we've always moved so fast.

I mean,
we said I love you on Beach Day

in high school after dating for a week.

And it was true, I did love you.

And I love you now.

And I've spent

the last three years
adjusting to life without you.

And it wasn't as good.

So we can slow down

if that's what you want.

But for my part,

we're not moving fast enough.

- Is that all?
- Mm-hmm.

This is America.

You should learn how to speak English.

Ay.

We all are, Alba.

We all are.

We, the people of the United States,

in order to form a more perfect union,

establish justice,

insure domestic tranquility.

Dang, Alba's getting all P.C. on us.

Probably none.

Ay.

You should do something.

You clearly want to.

You should march.

Why not?

It won't.

Ay.

That must be Lina.

- Hola.
- Ah!

You can look at my
reflection in the ring,

so you don't have to pick.

So... where's Danny?

- Oh, he couldn't come.
- That's too bad.

Hmm. If this is like riding a bike,

the bike is missing its handlebars.

And both wheels.

Hi, Mr. Sweetface! Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay.

Hi, Mateo! Oh, my gosh,

you are so grown up.

Look, I brought you a present.

Oh.

I don't know you,

and Mommy says not to
take gifts from strangers.

Hey, Lina's not a stranger,
she's your godmother.

Then why don't I know her?

Awkward.

Let's get out of here, Jane.

- Okay! Why are we still standing here?
- Yeah.

Let's... come on in.

Have you set a date yet?

- No, not yet.
- Oh.

- But definitely in the fall.
- Mm.

I'm not doing bridesmaids
or anything like that.

No, I mean... I wasn't...

But, yeah. Fall is fun.

So tell me all about Danny.

You met online?

An app actually.

- Bumble.
- Hmm.

Oh, it's pretty cool.

The girls contact the guys,

so it weeds out any
weirdos stalking you.

You should try it.

When you're ready to date.

Oh. I am, actually. Dating.

Oh, wow.

- Yay!
- I mean...

But, I mean, no one seriously.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

Well, here, l-let me show you.

I-I still have it on my phone.

I just pooped

and you don't even
have to check my wipe.

Oh! Yes, I do.

Timmy says checking is just for babies.

Well, Timmy is...

A d*ck.

Wrong.

So let's go.

Wait, Jane.

Danny just texted. It's terrible timing,

but this date just opened
up at this wedding venue

that was supposedly booked,

and his mom just got us a
last-minute appointment.

- You're leaving?
- I don't want to.

I'd beg them to move it,
but there's just no other time,

and we have a cake tasting

at : , and I leave
tomorrow morning, so...

No, of course, I get it. Go.

I have a tush to wipe anyway.

Okay. I'm so, so sorry.

I'll text you.

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Whatever, I'm not waiting by the phone.

It's Fabian.

So, how's that, how's that going?

Honestly,
I'm like this weird horndog around him.

It's all I think about.

Yeah.

It's hard dating someone
who doesn't put out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, how'd you do it?

Well, I gave myself carpal tunnel,
for one thing.

Oh, my God. I can give you a
list of the Web sites I used.

Be serious! I am being serious.

But I loved you, right?

So, I always knew you
were worth waiting for.

Aw.

Well, I don't love Fabian.

Raf?

- Hmm?
- Huh?

Oh, sor... yeah, so just, uh,

find a way to take Fabian's
looks off the table.

What's with the piney look?

You were just staring at
Petra with this piney look.

Hate to say I told you so.

What's going on?

And I just had this moment,
when I was looking at her,

and I don't know.

It was like, everything changed.

And, suddenly, I thought,
maybe what I've been looking for

has been right in front
of me this whole time.

I mean, maybe we just went
on this whole crazy journey

just to find our way back to each other.

Sorry, I'm, I'm... I'm just...

Shocked?

Jealous?

A little of both?

Surprised, that's all.

I know.

I was surprised, too.

But I think I really
want to be with her.

What is it?

Nothing.

Just say it.

Drop some judgment on me.

Come on, I'm asking for it.

You think you want to be with her,
or you know?

Because it took her a
long time to get over you.

And as someone who cares about Petra...

But do not tell her that
unless it's Saturday brunch...

I don't want to see
her get hurt... again.

So just be sure.

Before you open everything up again.

That's all.

I know it's just something
you say when you're a kid,

but I honestly thought Lina and
I would be best friends forever.

Hmm?

Okay. How do I look?

That was a trick question.

It doesn't matter.

Good point? Where are they going?

This is fun, right?

Uh, yeah, yeah, definitely.

Is it weird?

Very weird.

Where are we?

No, it's great.

I've always wanted to try this.

Try what?

Seriously? What's going on?

- Ow.
- Are you okay?

I just banged my tooth with my spoon.

Oh, I know.

They are...

Yup. It's the perfect place

for Jane to get to know the real Fabian.

So, have you read anything good lately?

Oh, yeah. I love magazines.

Plus, my scripts.

Hey, I bet you're a real reader.

You like books and stuff, right?

Yeah. I like... books and stuff.

Ow. I poked myself with my fork.

All right, I've had enough of this.

We need to see.

Uh, so are you reading anything now?

Uh, well, because of everything
that's going on, Orwell.

The popcorn guy?

It's okay, Jane.

You can roll your eyes.

He can't see.

Hey! Turn that off.

No phones in here.

Hey, I couldn't help but notice your,
your face

in your phone glow.

You seem sad. What's wrong?

It's my friend Lina.

I just have to accept that
things have changed for us.

It's like my Abuela says,

in times of crisis,

you... learn who your real friends are.

No! A real friendship
is worth fighting for.

Look, I haven't known you for that long,

but you talk about Lina a lot.

You should talk to her.

She's leaving tomorrow.

That means you still
got tonight. Go to her!

Don't let her leave
town without telling her

how you really feel.

Spoken like a true Telenovela star.

And speaking of Telenovela stars...

Okay, I hope you're excited,

because I can't wait
to show you this house.

It's perfect.

I'm sorry, but I have to cancel.

I've come down with something

and I'm home in bed, sick.

Oh. So, you are home,
in bed, sick right now?

Yep. I'm just lying under the covers,
feeling terrible.

Oh, well, I'll just,
uh, call the Realtor

and ask if we can reschedule.

Feel better.

Wait, what?

I said, I reviewed all their evidence,

and I also analyzed the graphic residue

on the missing page of the
burn book through a light box.

Got it.

Sorry, I'm just so used to seeing you

as an incompetent maintenance man,

this whole P.I. thing
is just a little much

to wrap my mind around.

Just tell her what you told me.

There was some writing in
the corner that Scott erased.

Wait, J.P.?

As in the elusive mystery person

the cops have been looking for?

- Shake him down?
- Yeah.

Definitely doesn't sound good.

Bar's in Pensacola.

I'll head over this
weekend to check it out.

We identify J.P.,
then we drop an anonymous tip

to the cops, let them do the rest.

Perfect. Thank you.

This is good. Right?

A way to get your sister
off and not implicate you.

This J.P. could be our answer.

What?

And in that moment, friends,

she was reminded of what Chuck said.

I'm telling you, that pretty
boy wants to get in them shorts.

Uh, I'm sure this is a stupid question,

but... do you have feelings for me?

Like...

romantic feelings.

And in that moment, friends,

he was reminded of what Jane said.

Just be sure.

What? No.

- Of course not.
- Oh, oh. Phew. Okay, good.

Good.

Mmm. That's so good.

I'm sorry, we're closed
for a private event.

Oh, she just wants to speak
to her very best friend Lina.

Jane?

Surprise.

What are you doing here?

- Uh...
- Well,

this really hot Telenovela
star said to run to you.

Well, I knew you were
leaving town tomorrow,

and I just wanted to meet
Danny before you left.

Hi, Danny, I'm Jane.

- Hi. I've heard so much about you.
- Oh.

Would you like to stay?

- Yes!
- Oh, no, no, no.

This is your cake testing.
Yes, we'd love to, I love cake.

We shouldn't have come. No, no, no.

- No, we should go.
- Ay, don't be ridiculous.

There's no way they
could eat this much cake.

No, stay, for sure.

Danny, let's let

- the ladies catch up.
- Where are you from?

Who are your enemies?

Uh, no one?

And I'm from New York.

I'm sorry for all of this.

I... I just felt like it
was really weird earlier.

I know, it was.

I had a great meeting
with our Miami office

when Lina and I were in town last June.

Wait.

Wait, you were here in June?

Just for a couple days.

You didn't call me then, either?

W-Well, at least she called you

Th-this time, right? Right?

Oh, I feel like such an idiot.

No, no. I've been chasing after you,

and you obviously don't
want to be friends.

Of course I do.

- You disappeared.
- That's not fair, I moved.

That's not what I'm talking
about and you know it.

Yes. Now we're getting somewhere.

Who is this guy?

Oh, uh, Fabian. And we're dating.

No, we are just getting
to know each other.

Can we talk about this in the bathroom?

Fine.

Okay, so where were we?

I did not abandon you.
I saw you every week that first year.

The second year was even harder.

You could've tried to stay in touch.

- I did try.
- No, you didn't.

After you met Danny,
you stopped calling.

That's not what happened.

Okay, so?

I called you at first.

And then Danny and I
had our first fight,

about a month in,
about something stupid.

He, he was in touch
with his ex-girlfriend,

and I remember, I called you then, too.

And you said...

It's all insignificant
in the big picture.

I mean, I'd give anything

to have one more fight with Michael.

Yeah.

That, that's a good point.

Oh, my God.

I didn't really say that.

I mean, I get it. In
the scheme of things...

No, no. You were, you
were falling in love,

you were living.

I just, I really didn't know

how to be upset around
you in a regular way.

Or happy around you.

And I really wanted to be happy.

I'd waited so long for my
life to click together,

and finally it was.

No.

I get it.

I'm sorry.

No, you shouldn't be sorry.

I'm just so glad you're happy,

and I want to share that with you.

Aw.

How sweet.

Sisterhood.

Shut your mouth, beautiful sister.

They want information,

I'm giving them you in his apartment.

Stop, just calm down, okay?

I've hired a P.I.,
he's following a lead,

- I-I just need some time.
- Sister!

I have hearing Monday on plea deal.

I need to get out of here.

And you will. I-I just,
I need until tiln.

Okay? I'll call you
tomorrow with an update.

Oh, I have to call Rafael,

get the P.I. to head out now.

Ah, screw Rafael.

Let's not wait on him.

Let's you and me drive

to Pensacola, find this
J.P. guy ourselves.

But why? Rafael has a professional.

Oh, Solano,
don't make me spell it out for you.

You never need help, woman.

And now you do.

And I want to be the guy that helps you.

Uh, l-let's do it.

I can't believe that
was your first kiss.

I know.

Okay.

Can we talk about Fabian now?

Oh, my God, so not a match.

I'm gonna need you to
show me Bumble again.

Find some real options.

Wait, why isn't he a real option?

He's waiting to have sex
and I just want a fling.

Okay. I find both shocking.

Waiting how long?

Oh, until things are
serious, and trust me,

it's not going to get serious.

How do you know?

He's too...

Hot? Sweet? Happy?

No, we're just really different.

He doesn't read.

Neither do I.

I mean, I'm just saying,

on paper,
you and I don't have much in common.

So don't write him off just
because you two are different.

People surprise you.

And I like happy for you.

I'm just... That's all I'm saying.

I like it for you, too.

Okay, why do we always end
up on the bathroom floor?

- Oh, I don't know.
- I don't...

But I'm glad that we always do.

I don't want to say it to you.

Okay.

It's hard sometimes.

This is America.

You should learn how to speak English.

ÿSí?

So, Daddy called because he said
you're upset about something.

Yeah.

Why do some people not
want Bisa in this country?

Well, that's actually
a really good question

and a really hard question

because this country
was founded by people

who came from all over,
like your great-grandma,

because they dreamed of a better
life with more opportunity.

But some people, well,
they can't see that,

and that's just a stinky, old fact.

That is stinky.

But no one is taking Bisa away,

so you don't have to worry
about that at all, okay?

Okay. Come on, Mr. Sweetface,

let's go change you before bed.

Kiss.


Chuck and I? Ouch.


Hmm?


Rogelio.


I'm sorry for canceling
on you and lying to you.

I just realized

that I wanted to do things
differently this time.

Oh, my God, oh, my God,
I'm going to faint.

Who knew when we first said
I love you on Beach Day...

I love you, Xiomara.

I love you, too, Rogelio.

That we'd end up here.

We've been through so much together

and so much without each other.

And life is beautiful and hard,

and the only thing I know for sure

is that I want to go
through it all with you.

I had Botox this morning,

so the tears are struggling to fall,

but I feel them.

It belonged to my father.

Rogelio de la Vega,

will you marry me?

Yes, yes, of course I will.

Aw, what can I say?

Every single time these two get engaged,
it gets me.

All right,
let's keep this romance train rolling.

Jane.

I'm so happy you're here.

Come on, give him a try, Jane.

Try to get to know him.

Well, our date was interrupted, so...

I'm just really glad that you
made up with your friend Lina.

Friendship is everything to me.

That's a really great quality.

I thought you said you never read .

I hadn't,
but after our conversation I bought it.

I'm almost finished.

Like I said, people can surprise you.

How do you not have a corkscrew?

Well, I had it.

I just lost it when I was drunk.

Your album?

You can't just throw that out there.

You sing? Are you good?

No, I'm terrible,

but that doesn't matter
when you're famous.

It's all sound engineers, I swear.

Sing this next verse.

♪ Mi corazón en fuego ♪

♪ Tus labios deseo. ♪

Yes!

- Victory.
- Wow.

You really are amazing at checkers.

So, yeah, I waited until marriage

and I'm glad that I did, but now...

Things are different.

I understand.

Is it just me,

or does this sort of feel
like one of those nights?

So, have you ever been in love?

Once...

but then I got famous

and people became different.

That's why I decided to put sex
on the back burner for a while

to prioritize what I
really want... love.

Plus, I wanted to get in
better with the big guy.

Jesus.

I love your laugh.

You know, the kind that goes on forever.

Well, who knows?

But it certainly was a
night of possibilities...

for some people.

Hi, you've reached Petra Solano.
Please leave a message.

Hey, um...

look, I know when you asked me before,
I denied it,

but the truth is...

I do have feelings for you.

And I know you are with Chuck...

but I don't know, I guess I'm calling

because I wanted to say,
before it's too late,

that you shouldn't be.

You should be with me.

I loved Scott.

Like I be telling you,
I wouldn't k*ll him.

I would want to k*ll whoever k*lled him.

Rip them to pieces.

Ooh, that's enough.

So, there's nothing
you're not telling us?

Scott's burn book mentioned
someone named J.P.

Do those initials mean anything to you?

Oh, you mean Jerky Pants?

What?

J.P. is short for Jerky Pants.

It's what we used to
call the horrible man

who wanted to buy hotel next door

because he was always
eating jerky of the gators.

Wait.

Chuck Chesser is J.P.?

Oh, no, but Chuck is with...

Like I said, people can surprise you.