♪ Here's the story ♪
♪ Of a lovely lady ♪
♪ Who was bringing up ♪
♪ Three very lovely girls ♪
♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪
♪ Like their mother ♪
♪ The youngest one in curls ♪
♪ It's the story of a
man named Brady ♪
♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
♪ They were four
men living all together ♪
♪ Yet they were all alone ♪
♪ Till the one day when ♪
♪ The lady met this fellow ♪
♪ And they knew that it was ♪
♪ Much more than a hunch ♪
♪ That this group must ♪
♪ Somehow form a family ♪
♪ That's the way we all ♪
♪ Became the Brady Bunch ♪
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
♪ That's the way we became ♪
♪ The Brady Bunch. ♪
Mom! Mom! Listen! Listen!
My goodness. Okay, okay...
Really great news. Guess what.
What?
We're in the glee club.
That's wonderful!
They had tryouts today,
and we were picked.
JAN: Listen to us.
♪ Oh-oh... ♪
♪ You take the high road ♪
♪ And I'll take the low road ♪
♪ And I'll be in
Scotland afore ye. ♪
Hooray for the Brady singers!
Hi, Bobby.
Hi.
Why the long face?
He didn't get picked
for the glee club.
Billy Mingus said Bobby
couldn't carry a tune
if it had a handle on it.
Oh, yeah?
Sue Barry said he
sounded like a frog.
( imitating frog): Croak, croak.
All right, Jan. That's enough.
Would you like an apple?
No, thanks.
How about some cookies?
Oh, I'll bet you'd
like a great big dish
of your favorite ice cream.
I don't want anything.
Aw, come on, Bobby. Cheer up.
You have a very nice voice.
It probably just
isn't the kind of voice
the glee club needs this year.
You really like my voice?
Listen, you can
sing for me anytime.
Yes, sir. I can?
( off-key): ♪ Oh, you
take the high road ♪
♪ And I'll take the low road ♪
♪ And I'll be in
Scotland before ye. ♪
That's... really not
bad at all, Bobby.
I sound awful.
Aw, come on, honey.
Look on the bright side.
You know, when boys grow
older, their voices change.
And I'll bet, when
yours changes,
you'll have a brand-new voice.
Yeah, and it might
even be worse.
Honey, Daddy's home.
Hello, son.
Hi, Dad.
I'm sorry about your
not getting in the glee club.
That's okay.
They didn't need
a rotten singer.
( chuckling)
I'm sure you're not that bad.
Ask Mom.
Of course he isn't that bad.
Yes, I am.
I may not sing
good, but I hear good.
Just because you
aren't a great singer
doesn't mean you aren't musical.
Maybe you should
play an instrument.
That's right. How
about trying one?
Like what?
Well, any instrument you want.
There must be one you like.
Maybe there is.
Why don't you ask
your music teacher
about it tomorrow?
That's what I'll do.
I'll pick an
instrument tomorrow.
Good. Now go wash up for dinner.
Have you heard him sing?
Yes.
And?
That was a very
good idea you had
about the instrument.
He's terrible.
You think you can take
the Blue Devils Saturday?
Take them? We'll
knock their horns off.
Guess who's helping us
at football practice today?
Who?
Deacon Jones.
Oh, don't give me that.
Deacon Jones is all-pro.
He plays with the Rams.
Yeah, but he's a
friend of our coach.
They played high
school football together.
So Deacon is going
to give us a few tips.
Son of a g*n.
Deacon Jones.
Let's go, Peter.
Come on or we'll be late.
Okay, I'm coming.
Don't tell me they're
on the team, too?
Come on.
We have glee
club practice first,
then I go to football
practice. See ya.
Peter!
Yeah?
You forgot something.
Your helmet...
and your left shoe...
and your right shoe.
( horn honking)
Hi.
Hello, Alice.
I picked my instrument, Alice.
I'll go tell everybody.
I never saw him so excited.
It's done wonders
for his morale.
What did he pick?
Behold...
Drums?
Well, I'm not so sure
what that's going
to do for our morale.
Well, his music
teacher encouraged him.
She said that he had
exactly the right qualifications.
Oh, what qualifications
does a kid need to play drums?
A mother with a station wagon.
You're offense, you're defense.
You've got to move quick.
You got to keep moving.
You've got to hit, and drive
through the quarterback,
and then drive
straight ahead. Got it?
Got it, Deacon.
All right. Go!
That's hitting it,
Larry. That's it.
Gee, the Rams
could sure use you.
Hey, Ted, what time is it?
Aw, that's about it, Deacon.
Afraid he's got to go, fellows.
( all moaning)
I'll be back, fellows.
I've got to go practice
with the big guys.
( saying good-byes)
BOY: Coach!
Coach, sorry I'm late.
It's all right, Pete.
I want you to meet Deacon Jones.
Deacon, this is Peter Brady.
Hi, Peter. Hey, you've
got a pretty good grip.
What position do you play?
End. Offensive end.
That's bad news
for fellows like me.
Take it easy.
I will. Good-bye.
You missed it, Pete.
The stuff Deacon
taught us was great!
Where were you?
I was at glee club.
It took longer than I expected.
You're kidding.
Glee club?
What's the matter?
You spent the whole time
sitting around with girls?
What do you mean, girls?
There's guys, too.
But they're songbirds.
Yeah. Canaries.
Sure. Football is for boys.
Hey, guys, did you hear?
We've got a canary on our team!
( derisive laughter)
I think those drums
will take Bobby's mind
off not getting
in the glee club.
Yeah. And, you know,
the kids were really very sweet.
They made a big fuss over them.
I hope he doesn't
get discouraged.
You know, you
can't learn to play
a musical instrument in a day.
It takes a lot of practice.
( banging on drums and cymbals)
( raising voice over
drums): Like you said,
it takes a lot of practice.
( wildly ambitious drumming)
( drumming continues)
♪ By yon bonnie banks ♪
♪ And by yon bonnie brae ♪
♪ Where the sun shines
bright on Loch Lomond... ♪
How are we supposed to practice?
You can hear those drums
all the way to Loch Lomond.
Right now, I wish Bobby
was in the glee club.
I wish he was in Loch Lomond.
Hi, kids.
Hi, Mom.
How's it going?
It isn't, Mom.
We can't hear ourselves sing.
I'll tell Bobby to knock it off.
Uh-uh. That's just
why I came in here.
To tell Bobby to knock it off?
No, sweetheart.
To remind all of you
how important those
drums are to Bobby.
He was very upset when he
didn't get into the glee club.
Now he's so happy to be
doing something musical.
Musical?!
Promise me you'll try
to be patient and
understanding, okay?
Okay.
Okay. I got football
practice anyway.
Cindy?
Okay.
( shouting over drums) It
really means a lot to Bobby!
We're sure not going
to get much homework done, Mom.
Well, I know it's hard,
but let's try not to
hurt his feelings, okay?
( drumming continuing)
Aren't you going
to study anymore?
Yeah, under the hair dryer.
It'll be quieter there.
( shouting over drums):
What's for dinner?
What?
Dinner!
Thanks!
I'm glad somebody
thinks I look thinner!
We have to straighten this out!
Yes, dear, but we started it.
Oh, yeah, we did,
but... ( drumming)
Well, maybe after
a few more lessons.
You honestly think
a few more lessons
will improve him?
Honestly?
Yeah, honestly.
Let's go in and talk to him.
I'm getting good, huh?
Well, actually, Bobby... uh...
I'll get even better
with more practicing.
More practicing?
Some guys practice
eight hours a day.
Listen to this.
( playing pop music)
( turns off stereo)
Whoa!
( sighs)
I sure am glad
you wanted me to
play an instrument.
( chuckling)
We did, didn't we?
That we did.
( drum practice continues)
I got a groovy b*at, huh?
Well, Bobby, you play just fine
for a beginner.
Funny. Just what
I was going to say.
Gee, thanks.
Come on, let's go.
I wouldn't want to hurt
the star on the glee club.
Cut it out, Larry.
I've been taking it from
you guys all afternoon.
Aw, he got his feelings hurt.
Freddy, how about you?
No, I wouldn't want to
ruin your beautiful voice.
Jimmy?
No, you might sprain your ankle.
Then you wouldn't be able
to reach your high notes.
( all laughing)
All right, you guys.
We don't need
canaries on our team.
Maybe he could stand around
and sing songs while we play.
Peter can be a pom-pom girl.
( laughing)
( drumming)
Can we go to
the library tonight?
To do your homework?
Yeah. It's the only
place we can study
and get away from the drums.
You ought to try
it in the closet.
It's not bad at all in there.
All right, kids.
See you later.
Bye.
I don't know how we managed
to collect so much stuff.
These empty boxes
can go out, Alice.
I hate to say it, Mrs. Brady.
The more I hear Bobby play,
the more I'm convinced that
drumsticks are for turkeys.
At least it's better
here than in the kitchen.
Anyplace is better
than the kitchen.
It's directly in
the line of fire.
I'll get rid of these.
Oh, Alice.
Bobby hasn't
improved at all, has he?
Mrs. Brady, every day
he plays just a little worse
than the day before.
And today he's
playing like tomorrow.
Oh, hi, Alice.
Mom, can we go over to Linda's?
To rehearse for the glee club?
The drums.
JAN: Yeah.
Linda's house is
three blocks away...
Out of the noise belt.
Can we go?
Sure, kids. Run along.
Oh, come on, Pete.
We're going over to Linda's.
Not me. I'm not going.
But you have to.
I'm not going.
JAN: Come on.
But, Peter, don't
you have to practice?
Who can think of singing
with all that banging going on?
I might as well
quit the glee club.
Complaints are coming
in from all precincts.
I mean, Peter might
even quit the glee club
because of Bobby's drumming.
I've got a solution
to Peter's problem.
You have?
Did it ever strike you
that a musician should have
his own studio to practice in?
See? you got the whole garage.
Well, out here, you
won't be disturbed
by telephones all the time.
And your brothers and sisters
won't be in your way, either.
Yeah.
It's kind of like the
music room at school.
This is kind of like your
own private studio, huh?
Boy, that's neato.
Have fun.
Well, how about a coffee break?
Hey, good idea.
Careful. It's hot.
Ow.
Well, how's it going with
Bobby out in his studio?
( chuckles)
Good. At last I can concentrate
without that b*at-b*at
of the tom-tom clogging
up my head-head.
Well, I think we've
finally solved the problem.
Oh, Peter.
Hey, come in, son.
You can practice at home now.
Yeah, it's certainly
quiet enough now.
I don't feel very
much like singing.
Huh?
You mean you're still thinking
of quitting the glee club?
Tomorrow, I guess.
Well, I thought you said
it was Bobby's drumming.
I guess it's not really
because of Bobby.
Oh?
It's because of the
guys on my team.
Football team?
They think singing's for girls
and canaries.
Well, what's that supposed
to mean... canary?
I don't know.
I think it's a chicken
that can sing.
( chuckles)
That's why you're
leaving the glee club?
I guess so.
Listen.
Before you decide,
you better give that
some more thought.
Don't you quit for
the wrong reason.
But they keep teasing me.
Well, so what?
I don't think you're a canary
because you sing
in the glee club.
Huh?
You make up your own mind.
Why couldn't you play football
and still be in the glee club?
Yeah, I could do both,
but I think I better quit.
Oh, Mike, he
loves the glee club.
Yeah, I know he does.
( phone rings)
I'll get it.
Hello.
Speaking.
Yes.
Uh... yes, I understand,
but it's still
kind of early yet.
Yeah, of course.
Right.
Good-bye.
That's one of the neighbors
about Bobby's drumming.
Oh, well, there's always one
crank in the neighborhood.
( phone rings)
Hello. Yeah.
Well, so much for
the great outdoors.
( loud drumming)
Carol, we've been patient,
but now we've got
to do something!
Look, Mike, if
he can't practice,
he'll have to give up the drums.
He'll be crushed!
It's not going to crush him.
It may dent him a little bit.
Oh, Mike, couldn't
we wait just a little...?
It's not fair to the eight
other people in this house!
Or the neighbors... or the city.
( chuckles)
Or the state.
I suppose you're right.
Yeah, well, we'll simply
have to tell Bobby.
It's not fair to the
rest of the family.
Okay. We'll tell
him in the morning.
Good night, honey.
Good night, sweetheart.
No, let's tell him
tomorrow after school.
Why ruin his whole day?
Oh, yeah, no need
to ruin his whole day.
Boom-boom-boom.
What?
I said, "Boom-boom-boom."
It's that drumming that
keeps going through my head.
Just, "Boom-boom-boom."
Oh... oh, hey...
Just try as hard as you can.
That's all your coach
and your team can ask of you.
And that's all you
can ask of yourself.
Let's see how our pass defense
is coming along.
Peter, you play offensive end.
You, Larry, you're
defensive end.
Let's go.
Oh, boy, I get the canary.
( snide chuckles)
Cut that out, Larry.
He'll probably
stand up and sing.
( derisive chuckles)
Never underestimate
your opponent.
This guy will be a
cinch... He's a songbird.
Not anymore. I'm going
to quit the glee club.
You think this guy can't play
football because he sings?
Sure. You know, singing's
for canaries... sissy stuff.
I sing. Am I a sissy?
You? Gosh, no, Deacon.
Matter of fact, we've
got a group on our team.
And we perform when
we're not playing football.
I didn't know that.
If singing was sissy stuff,
we'd be missing a lot
of good men in sports.
That's right.
Rosie Grier, he sings.
I don't know anybody brave
enough to call him a sissy.
Not even me.
Then there's Joe Namath,
and another pretty tough
fella named Joe Frazier.
I don't think you
have to quit singing
just because you
think it's sissy.
No, I guess not.
Let's play football.
Let's have a little action here.
Go get him, Tiger.
Hi, honey.
( drumming)
Don't tell me. Let me guess.
Bobby's home.
Straight through the house,
and straight for those drums.
I think it's time
we had our little talk with him.
Oh, I'm with you.
I'll be late for practice.
Looks like you just finished!
( drumming stops) Looks
like you just finished.
I mean glee club.
I thought you quit.
Nope. Did you know
there's a lot of guys who sing
that aren't sissies?
Deacon Jones, Rosie
Grier, Joe Namath.
Would you call them sissies?
No. Not for the life of me.
Guess what.
Now there's a lot of guys
on the team trying out
for the glee club.
I better hurry or I'll be late.
Well, what do you
know about that?
( drumming)
Let's go have our talk.
I'll try and be gentle.
Hi.
Hi, Bobby.
Hello, son.
Your mother and I
would like to talk to you.
Sure. I want to
talk to you, too.
You do?
Well, I wanted to ask you...
well, if... gee, I hope this
doesn't make you mad.
What is it, Bobby?
Well, I know how much
you wanted me to be a drummer...
Would you be too
disappointed if I quit?
Quit the drums?
Uh-huh.
Forever?
Never mind.
I'll stick with them.
I know how much
you wanted me to play.
( drumming...)
If you want to
give up the drums,
that's perfectly
all right with us.
You sure?
Positive! That is,
if that's really what you want.
That's the point, Bobby.
Now, it has to be what you want.
There are certain things
a boy has to do, like
homework or chores...
But you shouldn't
pretend to enjoy things
just to please other people.
Ask Peter. He found
out the same thing.
I guess you're right, and
that really makes it neato.
There's another kid
at school... George...
And he wants to be a drummer.
Oh, well, I'm sure
George will appreciate
your giving up
the drums for him.
Well, that's really
very thoughtful.
Now I can switch with George.
He's going to play the drums,
and I'm going to
play his instrument.
His instrument?
Yeah. He loaned it
to me so I could try it.
The bugle?
Yeah.
Just listen to this.
( unpleasant honking)
I think he's going
to hurt himself.
( Bobby attempting
to play reveille)
Mike?
Is that Bobby?
It's not Gabriel.
I think he's trying
to play reveille.
( groans)
You're not going
to get up, are you?
Just long enough to
tie a knot in his bugle.
Hey, it's me!
Hi, honey.
Hi, sweetheart.
Bobby home?
Yeah.
Bobby!
What's that?
It's for Bobby.
I spent half the day
trying to figure this out.
I finally got it.
You called?
Yes, son. I have
something for you.
For me?
I know how very much
you want to be in the band,
and we tried the drums,
we tried the bugle,
but I honestly think
this is going to be the answer.
The baton?
Bobby, that's the most
important part of the band!
You think you can
learn to use that?
Sure, I can. Watch this.
( humming)
That won't give us any trouble.
( glass breaking)
Gee, I guess it'll
take a little practice.
A great idea.