01x09 - Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

[bunniefuu]

(Bill Haley and the Comets) ♪ One,
two, three o'clock, four o'clock rock

♪ Five, six, seven
o'clock, eight o'clock rock

♪ Nine, ten, eleven
o'clock, twelve o'clock rock

♪ We're gonna rock
around the clock tonight

♪ Put your glad
rags on, join me, hon

♪ We'll have some fun
when the clock strikes one

♪ We're gonna rock
around the clock tonight

♪ We're gonna rock,
rock, rock till broad daylight

♪ We're gonna rock, gonna
rock around the clock tonight

♪ When the clock
strikes two, three, and four

♪ If the band slows
down, we'll yell for more

♪ We're gonna rock
around the clock tonight

♪ We're gonna rock,
rock, rock till broad daylight

♪ We're gonna rock, gonna
rock around the clock tonight

(guitar solo)

♪ When the chimes
ring five, six, and seven

♪ We'll be right
in seventh heaven

♪ We're gonna rock
around the clock tonight

♪ We're gonna rock,
rock, rock till broad daylight

♪ We're gonna rock, gonna
rock around the clock tonight

♪ When the clock strikes
twelve, we'll cool off then

♪ Start a-rockin'
'round the clock again

♪ We're gonna rock
around the clock tonight

♪ We're gonna rock,
rock, rock till broad daylight

♪ We're gonna rock, gonna
rock around the clock tonight ♪

I am not! You are so!

How can I be late when I
was supposed to meet you

after the prom
committee meeting?

Yeah! Yeah!

The meeting was canceled!

Yeah! Yeah!

How was I supposed to know that?

Bulletin board!

Yeah, the bulletin board!

Trudy, this is a private fight.

Yeah! Yeah!

Listen, she was
nominated for prom queen.

You can't talk to her like that!

Yeah! Yeah!

You're botherin' my best friend!

Yeah! Yeah!

Well, you're botheri"
my best friend!

Yeah! Yeah!

Well, my friend's
more important!

Potsie!

You're right,
Rich. You're right.

These two want a little privacy,

so why don't you find
somethin' else to do, huh?

Yeah, take a break. Come on.

(Ralph) All right, all right.

There ya go, Rich.

There ya go, Arlene.

OK! I'm goin'!

OK! I'm goin', too!

You see, Arlene,

we've only been going
together for two weeks.

It's not like we're married.

Richie, one week is a crush.

Two weeks is a commitment.

It's not my fault.

I don't read the
bulletin board every day.

If you loved me, you would!

I don't have to read the
bulletin board for anybody.

I may never read
another bulletin board.

Oh, so you want to break up?

One minute, we're talking
about bulletin boards,

and the next, we're
talking about breaking up?!

So you do want to break up!

Maybe I do.

Well, maybe I do, too.

I, uh... guess you'll
want your ring back.

I guess so, as long
as we're breaking up.

What about the ID
bracelet I gave you?

Oh, it's-it's at home.

I was soaking it, trying
to get all the tarnish off.

I liked it, even though
it was tarnished.

(sighs)

Bye, Richie.

It was a nice two weeks.

I think this is your tape.

(sighs)

It won't hurt you to wear
a tuxedo for one night.

Besides, you look so handsome

when you're all dressed up.

I don't like tuxedos.

A lot of distinguished
men wear tuxedos -

President
Eisenhower, Bert Parks,

Bennett Cerf...
Charlie McCarthy!

Why do you always get
us hooked into these things?

Chaperoning Richie's
prom is an honor.

Mr. Faraday, the principal,
asked us personally.

Yeah, that's
because all the people

whose names begin
with "A" and "B"

were smart enough to say
they were busy that night.

Listen, if you're interested,

I can give you a map of all
the make-out places at school.

Where on earth would
you get something like that?

From Punky McDonald.

He's got maps of every
make-out place in town.

He's only .

Where would he
get anything like that?

By following his sister,
Hot Lips McDonald.

A map, huh?

You better be on
your toes, Richard.

Richie's not goin'. He
broke up with Arlene.

Oh! You can't miss
your junior prom!

Your first one!

I know. I hope the
second one's better.

Well, if you really
want to go to the prom,

there's only one thing to
do, and that's to take Arlene.

How can I take Arlene
when we just broke up?

Richard... there is one thing

that women like men to do.

It's what they call a
"romantic gesture."

We men call it "eating crow."

Howard.

Dracula!

I beg your pardon, Joanie?

Even Dracula wears a tuxedo.

♪ Splish-splash,
I was takin' a bath

♪ Long about a Saturday night ♪

I don't know, Kincaid.

What happened to that
air scoop I just put in?

Somebody stole it.

I keep tellin' ya, as long as
you've got this stock engine,

you ain't gonna catch
any souped-up jobs.

(tires squeal)

Hey, relax.

You'll chase him later.

I got a great idea.

Why don't you go get
yourself a cup of coffee?

I'll see what I can do.

Hey, Fonzie, could I
talk to you for a minute?

Sure. What about? Arlene?

Yeah. How'd you know?

Hey, you been moping
around here for two days.

I didn't figure it's 'cause
you lost your skate key.

I was sort of thinking

about trying to get back
together with her for the prom.

My dad says that... Forget it.

I didn't even tell
you what he said yet.

Hey, it doesn't matter.

If fathers knew
anything about chicks,

they'd be single
and still operating.

Well, what would you
do if you were me?

Brando.

Brando? Yeah.

Like in A Streetcar
Named Desire.

His wife walks out on him.

He stands under the window...

"Stella!"

Thanks, Fonzie.

Sure.

Oh, hey, it ain't ready yet.

Hi.

Hi.

Any new songs?

Yeah, this one
by, uh, Pat Boone.

Oh, good, good.

We needed another slow one.

Richie... is
something the matter?

No, no, I'm fine.

You look like Marlon
Brando without sound.

I did?

Richie, do you want to
talk to me about something?

Arlene... I understand you
don't have a date to the prom.

No, but I'm going
anyway... alone.

You got a date yet?

No.

See, everybody's all dated up.

But I-I was thinking that
I might drop by anyway.

Maybe I'll see you there.

Maybe I could give you a lift.

It's not at all out of my way.

I guess so.

All right.

It's not like it was
a date or anything.

Oh, no, no, I'll just
be giving you a lift.

OK.

All right, then, well, uh,

I guess I'll pick you up
around, uh, around eight.

Fine.

OK.

OK.

See ya.

Oh, Joanie, are you
still in there? Yes.

Well, my collar
stays are in there.

What's a collar stay?

Dad, my collar stays
are in the bathroom,

and Joanie won't let
me in there to get 'em.

I just took a bath,
and I'm drying off.

You see, Dad?

I hate cummerbunds
and I hate tuxedos,

and now I know why
Dracula was so irritable.

Joanie, hand out Richie's
collar stays, please.

What's a collar
stay? I'll get them.

Joanie, unlock the
door so I can get in.

Thanks, Marion.

Would you lend me a hand, Rich?

Oh, sure, Dad. Did the
corsages get here yet?

Not yet. I thought you
weren't going to this dance.

We're not, but I thought I'd
give her the corsage anyway.

Oh, well, that's nice.

Here they are. Oh, thanks, Mom.

No, let me help you, darling.

(doorbell rings)

I'll get it.

Maybe it's somebody who knows

whether the pleats of a
cummerbund go up or down.

That's good, Mom. I can get...

No, I want to. Let me help you.

Oh, good evening, Mrs. McCarthy.

I thought Mrs. Gavin
was going to sit for us.

Well, she had a
gallbladder att*ck.

I'm filling in for her.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

So was she.

Be sure you take your key

because I'm not opening
that door for anyone.

Yes, I remember.

You just make yourself at home

and excuse me
while I finish dressing.

Let me see. I've got all
the emergency numbers...

Police... fire... hospital...

You got Mrs.
McCarthy to baby-sit?

Yuck!

She's a nice lady.

She's always pinching my cheeks.

I get a bruised face!

(doorbell rings)

Maybe that's the florist.

(Mrs. McCarthy)
Who-Who-Who is it?

All right.

Oh! Don't you all look lovely!

Just something
we knock around in.

Ohh... there's my Joanie!

Uh, good night, Mrs. McCarthy.

Wait a minute! We
have to take pictures!

Pictures? Marion,
we're late already.

Oh, please, Howard.
This is a big event.

Stand next to Richard
by the fireplace.

Come on.

Everything to you
is such a big event.

We got a whole page
in the family album

dedicated to Richard's
first bowl of oatmeal.

Everyone's not in the picture.

Oh.

Flash.

Now I'm gonna see
spots all night long.

Mom, we really
have to get going.

Here, start the car.
We'll be right out.

Oh, let me help you
with that, Marion.

There it goes!

Oh, don't touch that,
Howard. That's hot.

(Ralph) Welcome
to Jefferson High's

"Teen Angel" prom.

For your dancing pleasure,

music by Billy
Comstock and the Courts.

All nominees for prom queen

should check in with Miss Folsen

under the chinning
bar before : .

Oh, Howard, that
was sweet of you

to let Richie take the
car to pick up Arlene.

Is something wrong
with the punch?

They always try
and spike it, Marion.

You have to stay one
jump ahead of them.

Well? Is it spiked?

No, but even if it was,
there wouldn't be a problem.

This punch is awful, Marion.

Hi.

Howard, put on your halo.

Marion, I'm not
going to put on a halo

and walk around looking
like the Good Fairy.

Well, here we are.

Yeah, we're here
all right... the prom.

Oh, there's Richard.

Boy, I'm having fun already.

Me, too.

Well, hi, kids.

Oh, you look so
nice tonight, Arlene.

Thank you, Mrs. Cunningham.

Doesn't she look
pretty, Richard?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, she does.

Aren't you two gonna dance?

Well, uh... maybe
after I get some punch.

I think I'll have
some punch, too.

You think they're going
to have any fun tonight?

Not unless the punch
gets spiked, Marion.

Hey, Rich. Hey, Arlene.

Why are you looking
at us that way?

True love wins out, huh?

Arlene.

Potsie, we're not here as dates.

We're here as friends.

I just gave her
a lift, all right?

Gotcha.

Hey, Arlene, since you don't
have a date, wanna dance?

All right.

Watch the punch bowl, huh, Rich?

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪ Sha-la-la-la

♪ Sha-la-la-la ♪

Hey, there's Doris.

I'm gonna go over and see her.

Hey, I'll tell you
when you can go.

You can go.

All right, Fonz!

You came to the prom!

Hey, don't rub it in.

Hey, Fonz. Boy!

Say, boy, you really... boy!

What time you due back
on the wedding cake?

You don't like my threads?

Oh, no, I didn't say that, Fonz.

No, I think they're cool.

Hey!

Super cool, Fonz.

I know.

Well, um, we're gonna go
over and get some punch.

Would you like some, Fonzie?

When you're over there,
why don't you bring me

a side order of lollipops, too?

What's that, dear?

Joanie's make-out map.

That Hot Lips McDonald
sure gets around.

Everything's checked
here but the football field.

Oh, yes, dear,

there's a little star
in the end zone.

(Howard) That's strange.

There's no seats
in the end zone.

(Marion) Howard,
where is that girl going?

Let's see, uh,

we're standing...
right there, huh?

So this must be
the broom closet.

Cheers, Potsie.

Thanks for the dance.

You haven't touched your punch

in the last seven dances.

Thanks. All that
dancing made me thirsty.

I wouldn't know. I
haven't danced yet.

Hi, Rich.

Hey, Arlene, Potsie
said you came here stag.

How 'bout a dance?

All right.

You look just beautiful tonight.

Have some punch.

(♪ "Tequila")

Is it spiked yet?

Not yet.

Oh, Howard, why don't you
ask Mrs. Frawley to dance?

Oh, Marion, chaperons
aren't supposed to dance.

Go on, Howard.
It'll make her happy.

She hasn't danced all night.

She's years old.

She probably hasn't
danced since V-J Day.

All right, I'll go.

Hey, Mrs. C.

Oh. Hello, Fonzie.

I see, uh, Mr. C. is danci"
with Grandma Frawley, huh?

Where's your date?

Oh, she's in the, uh...

Oh. I know what you mean.

Hey, uh, since we're
just, uh, standin' here,

you want to, uh, do somethin'?

What did you have in mind?

Dance?

Oh.

Well, I would love to.

Hey, yeah.

Whoa! That's the dip!

I know. That's nice!

Hello, Howard.

Oh, Mrs. Frawley,

you look like a young
girl dancing like that.

She's asleep, Marion.

(♪ slow music)

What, what, what?!

Heh-heh-heh.

Would you like to
dance? Let's dance.

We're gonna dance.

(applause)

Thanks, Bill.

I've never danced so
much in my whole life.

You've danced with everybody
except the janitor and me.

The janitor was busy sweeping,

and you haven't asked me.

I don't like standing in line.

You act like you're jealous.

Why should I be jealous?

You're the one who broke up.

You're the one who broke up.

You took your ring back.

What about your ID bracelet?

It's still soaking.

I was gonna give it back

as soon as I get
the tarnish off.

I think I'm gonna go
ask the janitor to dance!

Good! I'm sure the janitor
will love to dance with...

Arlene!

OK, everybody,
let's settle down here.

A little quiet, please.

It's time to announce
Miss Teen Angel.

Yay! Yay!

The winner and her escort
will rule over Teen Heaven

for the rest of the entire prom.

Yay! Yay!

But before I bring
up Miss Teen Angel,

the principal asked me
to tell you something...

You're all expelled.

(silence)

Yeah, well...
moving right along,

I'd like to introduce

Miss Teen Angel's
heavenly attendants.

The second runner-up...
Second runner-up

is... "Miss Carol Risco"!

(whistling and applause)

(young man) Carol! Yay!

Very nice. Very nice.

Now I'll bring on Teen
Angel's first runner-up.

And she is... "Arlene Holder"!

I wonder where she is.

I've heard of sore losers,
but this is ridiculous.

(silence)

And now, without
much further ado,

the event you've
all been waiting for...

The crowning of Miss Teen Angel!

A drumroll, please.

(drumroll)

This year's Miss
Teen Angel is...

Sandy Hauser!

Aah! I won! I'm Miss Teen Angel!

I'm not happy about this, Sandy.

I crown thee Miss Teen Angel.

Now for her escort.

Hey, Ralph, I wouldn't do that,

if you know what I mean.

I know what you mean, Fonz.

OK, everybody,

now the heavenly royalty
will get in their cloud

and circle Teen Heaven.

Everybody got their angel dust?

(cheering and applause)

Mr. Escort, let's get inside.

And Miss Teen Angel.

Isn't this fun?
Isn't this great?

First she drags me here.
Now she's Teen Angel.

I can't win!

Ha-ha! He's always kidding!

Toss that dust! Toss
it! Come on, everybody!

Let's hear it for them!

Throw that dust over there!

Keep it going, keep it going!

Yay! Yay!

Oh, I wonder where
Richie and Arlene are.

Well, look, you just keep
throwing your angel dust

and pretend to be Tinker Bell,

and I'll see if I can find them.

OK, that's enough.
You gotta dance.

Step right off.

Yay! Yay!

And now Miss Teen
Angel and her runner-up

will share a solo
dance with their escorts.

(♪ slow music)

Dad... Well, congratulations!

I see you two are
going steady again.

Oh, by the way, Arlene,
double congratulations.

You just won Miss Runner-Up.

I think they expect
you two kids to dance.

OK.

Oh, Dad... Don't worry, Richard,

I'll hold the room for you.

After all, I'm a chaperon.

That's why I didn't
wear my halo.

Oh, I-I'm sorry, but
this spot is taken.

Why don't you, uh...

try the Home Ec
room. It's got four stars.

(♪ slow music)

I'm going to take
this home for Joanie.

Mmm.

What's the matter, Howard?

It's spiked!

I wonder when they did that.

Well, anyway, it tastes better.

(sighs) Ohh.

I think the prom
was a great success.

They would have made more money

if they'd charged admission
to the broom closet.

You know, Howard,

you haven't asked me
to dance once tonight.

Marion, we're chaperons.

Chaperons aren't supposed
to dance when they're on duty.

You're not on duty now.

May I have this dance,
Mrs. Cunningham?

My pleasure, Mr. Cunningham.

You remember our prom?

Mm-hmm.

You took me for a walk,

and you chased me
around the oak tree.

There's an oak tree outside.

Oh?

You want to chase
me around a while?

Oh, Marion, I'm too old
to run around oak trees.

Hey, how about the broom closet?

The oak tree.

Let's see... where
is that oak tree?

Ha-ha!

What time do you have
to be home, Marion?

♪ Hello, sunshine goodbye, rain

♪ She's wearin' my
school ring on her chain

♪ She's my steady, I'm her man

♪ I'm gonna love her all I can

♪ This day is ours
♪ Won't you be mine?

♪ These happy days
♪ This day is ours

♪ Oh, please be
mine ♪ Oh, happy days

♪ Happy days ♪