02x10 - Shadow

Episode transcripts for the TV show "PEN15". Aired: February 8, 2019 –; December 3, 2021*
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Comedy series that depicts middle school as it really is.
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02x10 - Shadow

Post by bunniefuu »

MAYA: Taking a nap!

No one bother me!

Boobs.

[EERIE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- [SCREAMS]
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[FOLDER CLOSES]

Hi, Ume.

SINGER: ♪ I ♪

♪ I am hiding ♪

♪ The you I show to you ♪

♪ Is just a lie ♪

♪ You take what you want ♪

♪ You get what you take ♪

- ♪ Lie ♪
- SINGER: ♪ So high, high, high ♪

YUKI: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

I didn't do that.
What'd sh... what'd she say?

She said she wants to give you this pin.

It's from the plane.

- The pin?
- YUKI: Mm-hmm.

- Oh, yeah, I get it.
- [SPEAKS JAPANESE]

Thought she was saying something else.

Um, Shuji, can you ask her
if she wants to play with me?

Why don't you ask her?

[SIGHS]

Ume... [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

SHUJI: [LAUGHS]

- SHUJI: [LAUGHING]
- What?

- What was that?
- YUKI: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]
- [CHUCKLES]

Did you just say she's
coming to school with me?

- [CHUCKLING]
- I'm with you, Maya.

I... most of this is
goin' right over my head.

I'm following most
of everything they're saying.

I do know, Ume, that you look...

about the same as you were
when you were this big.

YUKI: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

YUKI: You're so cute.

Me too, right, Dad?

I look the same
as that picture?

SHUJI: Yeah, you look the same.

Except you're, like, way bigger

- and you have a mustache now.
- Shut up!

Maya, you are a beautiful woman.

Dad, don't call me that.

- FRED: Well, you are.
- I'm not a woman, I'm a girl.

Like, I'm a kid. I'm
one year older than her.

Well, you're a little more mature.

That's so gross and weird
for you to say, like,

I'm a little kid.

- f*ck!
- Dad.

- What?
- So good.

The TV! Come on...

Okay, well, let me try.

Give me...
that's not the right one.

Did you try pressing the...

I bet the one that
your mother kept is working.

Just sayin'.

Okay, well, we don't need
to watch something,

like, we can just... chat.

- Right? Really.
- Yeah, yeah.

Um... oh, my God, congratulations

on your new place.

- Mm.
- Cheers.

- It's okay.
- It's really good.

Yeah, I don't know how long
it's gonna take me to unpack.

Well, I'll help you.

I'll help you make it feel
like your home.

Does that mean that...

you know, you're gonna
pick my place full-time?

'Cause that would be really fun.

- I'm thinking about it.
- CURTIS: Yeah.

Yeah, I think it would be really fun.

- Oh, great.
- ANNA: I really miss you.

- [PHONE RINGING]
- Oh.

- CURTIS: I hoped that you would.
- You stay there.

I'll get it.

- Hello?
- MAYA: Hey, Na, it's Mai.

- [WHISPERING] It's Maya.
- MAYA: Na!

- Hi.
- MAYA: Hi.

Are you at your dad's place?

- Yeah. It's great.
- MAYA: Oh, my God. Amazing.

No, I love it here. It's so beautiful.

MAYA: So you're never gonna believe it,

but Ume is here from Japan.

- Are you serious?
- MAYA: Yeah.

- "Oomi" ... Ume?
- MAYA: Anna, it's Ume.

No, that's what I meant.
Yeah, I can't wait to meet her.

MAYA: Well, can you meet her now?

I would love to, let me ask.

MAYA: 'Cause it's awkward
just the two of us.

Hey, Dad.

Um, do you mind if I go to Maya's?

Uh, it's a school night.

No, I know, but it's a special occasion

'cause her friend's here from Japan.

Oh.

Please?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

No, go ahead and go.

Hi, he said I can go and to have fun.

MAYA: What? Okay, come right now!

- ANNA: Okay, I'll see you soon.
- MAYA: Bye.

[INSECTS CHIRPING]

[CHUCKLES]

[SUPPRESSED LAUGHTER]

[LAUGHS]

I've heard so much about you from Maya,

and I'm glad that you're here.

She doesn't speak English.

Like, she can't understand that.

Sayonara.

- [LAUGHING]
- Na, that means bye.

Oh, sorry.

- MAYA: No.
- Okay... oh, okay, okay.

- I'm gonna translate for you.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

I always forget, like,
my best friend's fluent.

Like, pretty fluent.

It's just 'cause my mom's Japanese,

but, like, not fully.

Don't downplay yourself.

Isn't she, like, so cute?

I feel like we could
pass as twins, look.

- [GASPS SOFTLY]
- Oh, yeah.

Or she's, like, your baby sister.

Mm.

ANNA: Just 'cause her skin's
paler and she looks more, like,

innocent and, like, she's
shorter and, like...

like, that stuff.

Like me, like my... my skin and stuff.

Yeah, but hers is more porcelain-y.

Okay, thanks.

No, not in a bad way. Not in a bad way.

You both are beautiful.

[LAUGHS SOFTLY]

[WHISPERING] She keeps staring at you.

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[SNORTS]

- What?
- Nothing.

That's so mean, Ume.
That's not true, like...

she said your nose is big.

- [LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]
- Oh, that's okay.

I'm sorry. That... Ume...
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

I feel like ours are
the same size though.

Do you wanna just tell her
that really quick?

- Uh... yeah! Yeah!
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- It's the same, like... she gets it.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- Yeah, we don't...
- ANNA: Sh...

Play... it's a card
game we used to play.

- We don't wanna do that.
- ANNA: Speedo?

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

You know, so I think...
What does "baba" mean?

No to the cards.

Let's just, like, play
pretend or something.

ANNA: Mm, got to get my mash not lumpy,

'cause my angel doesn't
like lumpy mash.

I know my angel, and
she likes a lumpy mash.

Yum, yum, yum! It's a lumpy mash.

Okay, well, Steve
likes a not lumpy mash,

just so you know.

Oh, my God, Na. You just said Steve.

- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!

- Wait.
- No, I didn't mean to do that.

I didn't even mean to say Steve.

[CHUCKLES]
Like, that's my husband.

- MAYA: Has he called you yet?
- Maybe, I don't know.

I gave him my mom's number,
and I'm at my dad's, so...

Well, wouldn't your mom tell
you if he called or something?

- ANNA: Probably, yeah.
- Mama.

Okay, not now, Ume, like...
[DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Um, you guys have made out so
much, like, he's gonna call.

- Hope so.
- [MUSIC GETS LOUDER]

[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

♪ ♪

- [MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY]
- What's the guy

that likes me again, what's his name?

The high schooler?
ANNA: Derek.

- [HEAVILY ACCENTED]
- School.

Squirrel?

- No.
- Okay, squirrel.

She's trying to... No, Anna,

she's trying to say school.

Like, sometimes words
come out differently

when you're not from here.

- Right.
- But she was just saying

"sker."

[LAUGHING] Anna, don't laugh!

That's mean! That's, like,

how it's gonna come out tomorrow.

She's gonna be like "sker."

ANNA: They're gonna destroy her.

MAYA: Oh, my God.

BOTH: Oh, my God.

They're gonna be, like, so mean to her.

I mean, think about how people
barely like that I'm Asian.

She's full. She's gonna
get, like, roasted.

Oh, my God.

MAYA: Ume, at "sker"...
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[WITH ACCENT]
I know.

I protect you. You...
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- ANNA: Can you just translate this?
- MAYA: Okay.

- We got your back.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

She get... she gets it now.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MR. O: Uh, okay, class.

Maya's cousin is with us today.

No, we're not related.

Okay, friend then, whatever.

Uh, she wanted to see what
an American school was like,

so let's all be very welcoming to her.

Why don't you come up front

so we can introduce you to everyone.

Oh... [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Do you want us to go with you?

We should just go with...

I'm just gonna come up
with her, is that...

No, you're fine where you are.

Ume means plum, right?

Everyone, this is Ume.

Let's give her a big
Trailview welcome, hm?

Yeah.

- [HEAVILY ACCENTED]
- Thank you, school.

- [LAUGHS]
- Oh, my God.

She's so cute. I love her!

[OVERLAPPING GIGGLING AND FAWNING]

What?

She actually loves
doing the peace sign so much.

She thinks it's so, like, funny.

She'll put it in a photo.

Mr. O, can she please shadow me?

- Oh, she's shadowing us, so...
MAYA: Yeah, she...

I'm the only one who speaks Japanese,

so she can't understand without me.

- Not the only one.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- UME: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]
- What's he saying?

Shh, I'm trying to follow.

I'll explain later.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]

[DRAMATIC CLASSICAL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- [MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY]
- Have to be careful with Ume,

Maya needs to translate, you guys.

You guys, stop!

Ah, you're touching her a lot.

- Oh, my God!
- That's so cool-looking!

You guys, you're gonna k*ll it.

She loves that thing.
I'll take care of it.

[OVERLAPPING CHATTER]

- They really love Ume.
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- We were so worried.

Unexpected, but wonderful.

- Hi, Ume.
- Uh, my favorite fruit is plum.

Don't look at us.

That's my ex. He's,
like, still not over me.

He loves her. Ex-eh.

Ai-ai-ai. Get it?

Hey, "Oomi." Your hair's so pretty.

So black.

My hair's always been black.

Wait, Maya, do you speak Japanese?

- Yeah.
- BECCA: Ooh.

Can you ask "Oomi"
where she got her socks from?

- Yeah.
- I'm, like, totally obsessed.

Yeah, I, like, have the same socks.

They're just from Japan.

- What's up?
- MAYA: What's up?

Hector wanted me to tell you
that he thinks "Oomi" 's cute.

HECTOR'S FRIEND: Ume! Come on, bro, go.

Ume!

- Oh, my God.
- They're so dumb.

Hector... the stripes,
thinks you're cute.

Just like the high schooler,
Steve, thinks I'm cute...

and wants to be with me.

I don't care.

Anna, she doesn't understand
English or gestures like...

That's why you're here to translate.

Okay, I know. I just said it.

ANNA: Okay.

Yeah, Hector wants to play
Crashed Bandicoot: Warped

with her and hang out.

- Go tell her.
- Um...

I just told her. What?

Well, you guys, maybe
everyone should just

hang out at Maya's.

- Oh, yeah.
- If you want,

because that's where Ume's staying.

- Yeah.
- She, um, she has DDR and stuff.

It's this, like, cool,
like, Japanese dance game.

Um... [GIRLS GIGGLING]

If you guys want, like...

Yeah, she'd love that.
So if you guys wanna just...

you can invite Hector or whatever,

and you all can come too.

- Yeah.
- What's DDR?

- Yeah, cool.
- It's the dance...

I'll go tell him right now.

- Cool, if I can.
- Yeah.

- Ume!
- Ume.

Hey, uh, "Hector."

BOTH: Hector!

What, are you bored of me already?

[CHUCKLING] Just like your mom?

Just kidding. But you
know, the more time

you spend with Maya, you know,
cuts into my time with ya.

No, I know, but she just
needs my help, like,

with the party, you know?

Okay, well, when you get home,

I have a surprise for you.

- Oh, that's so nice.
- Okay, cool.

Love you, Dad! Thank you so much!

I love you too.

- [VIDEO GAME STARTUP SOUND]
- Okay, so you have to press it

- on the arrows...
- I know.

- So where's Ume?
- MAYA: No, you don't know

how to play.

- [VIDEO GAME SOUNDS]
- No... Anna.

- Please don't touch it.
- ANNA: Sorry.

MAYA: Just give me a second.

ANNOUNCER: Dance Dance Revolution.

[VIDEO GAME NOISES]

Okay, it's set up. Ready?

So you're gonna do these two,
and I'm gonna do these two.

- ANNA: Okay.
- Okay, ready?

[MUTTERING]

[STOMPING]

Anna, Anna, Anna. Right, right... no.

- Oh, my God, Anna!
- It's not sensing me.

MAYA: Okay, we failed.

That's 'cause Anna was hitting it wrong.

I don't think you guys need
to stomp so hard.

It only takes a light touch.

MAYA: Anna was stomping really hard.

- Maya, I was doing the guy.
- MAYA: You were supposed to...

- Okay, head count on hot dogs.
- MAYA: Dad, get out, please.

- I'll make the full pack.
- MAYA: Go!

CONNIE: That's your dad?

He's not Japanese though.

- Yeah, he's white.
- CONNIE: Weird.

You look full.

- No, I don't.
- [SCOFFS]

Um, Hector, when will the
rest of your friends be here?

Uh, they never said anything.

Also, my dad dropped me off.

Sick.

[GIRLS GASPING, FAWNING]

- Hi!
- Come here, come sit.

My bro!

- What up?
- SHUJI: Get off!

Ow, don't move my arm
like that, you psycho.

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Whoa. "Sooji," your
Japanese is really good.

"Sooji," you and "Oomi" actually

look more related than you and Maya.

Yeah, that's because me
and Maya are half-siblings.

Unfortunately, she got the bad half.


- Oh, really?
- Yeah.

- Is white the bad half?
- Yeah!

You wish you had more white in you.

You'd look way better, bitch.

I actually think, Shuji,

that you're very, very
attractive the way you are.

Ew, Anna.

Wait, hold on, so the hot dog
guy isn't your dad?

- [LAUGHING]
- No, uh, my birth dad

lives in Japan.

Yeah, but that's still our dad.

- That's like...
- SHUJI: Yeah.

- He's your dad.
- SHUJI: I know.

That's why you and Ume have
such exotic names.

I've always wanted my
name to be Yolanda.

SHUJI: Yeah, and that's why
I can speak Japanese fluently,

and Maya can barely say a sentence.

That's... you're lying.
I speak full Japanese.

- [VIDEO GAME SOUNDS]
- Tell them.

ANNOUNCER: Perfect,
perfect, p... perfect.

Are you guys seeing this?

ANNOUNCER: Perfect, perfect, perfect.

CONNIE: Holy sh*t.
"Oomi," can I play with you?

BECCA: You're, like, perfect.

[DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- All right, that's enough.
- [MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY]

My turn. [STOMPING]

Maya. Don't move her arm like that.

I didn't move her arm li...
I, like, touched her

- like you touched my arm.
- SHUJI: Now she's crying.

Great job, idiot.

Sorry!

ANNA: She's crying 'cause
everybody loves her?

- Okay, weird.
- Guess she's not into you.

- [WHISPERING]
- I mean, honestly, like,

I love her, but she's kind of a problem.

No, and I hope that she's
okay, and I felt super bad,

but I'm also like, everybody's
complimenting you up the ass.

We're sleeping on the floor for you.

Like, can you stop being
such a crazy bitch?

- Yeah.
- Like, honestly.

No, like, seriously.

And I love her, but, like...

I love her, but she
is an attention whore.

- Truly, truly, truly.
- ANNA: Because she's just like,

oh... you know?

Like...

and then, like...
[FAKE CRIES]

Like, bitch.

- Hey.
- Hey, Ume.

[TENSE MUSIC]
MAYA: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- [WHISPERING]
- I just...

Anna, I just asked if you're okay,

and she didn't answer.

Oh.

- [LAUGHS]
- Guess it's time for bed.

[DOOR OPENS]

- Get out!
- Get out...

[MUTTERING INCOHERENTLY]

[OMINOUS MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[METAL SCRAPING]

- [WHISPERING]
- What?

[INAUDIBLE]

[LAUGHS POLITELY]

[WHISPERING] Pig Latin.

- Smart.
- [SPEAKING PIG LATIN]

Hm?

[SPEAKING PIG LATIN]

[SPEAKING PIG LATIN]

Like, she's kind of a liar.

Like, she'll say
she saw people doing things

that they weren't doing,
like, it's really weird.

[INTENSE MUSIC] Get out!

I mean, I haven't
personally seen her do that,

but I also don't speak Japanese,

so I could be wrong, like, I trust you.

I trust you that you're right.

- Oh, my God.
- What?

- Ume, what?
- [SPEAKS JAPANESE]

Did you just see her glare at me?

- Like, that's crazy.
- Mm.

I'm just feeling really
stressed out, like...

She needs to go.

- Okay, get up.
- We're gonna fix this.

Let's go.

- Um, sorry.
- [SIGHS]

[SPEAKS PIG LATIN]

Mrs. Ishii-Peters, we'll be back.

- Okay.
- Got to fix this.

Maya, go.

Okay, you guys...

just hug.

Hug.

See, she doesn't even want to touch me.

She, like, thinks I'm disgusting.

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Hug her.

Like, if you think I'm disgusting

and you don't like me, you can leave.

Like, honestly... [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- What?
- UME: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]
MAYA: You're yelling at me. Like, s...

Anna, she's yelling at me!

You're yelling at me!
Like, stop, you're yelling!

Did you just call me stupid?

She just called me stupid.
You think I'm stupid?

f*ck you.

Sorry, like, f*ck you, honestly!

Everyone thinks she's perfect.

You're so much better than me, okay?

- You win.
- Maya,

she's a year younger
than us, like, chill.

Why is everyone on Ume's side?

Why is being Japanese special
on her and bad on me?

[CRYING] Why?

Oh, my God, I'm getting your mom.

I'm getting your mom, Maya.

[SNIFFLING]

I hate you.

I really hate you.

Ume.

- UME: [CRYING]
- Oh, my God, I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry. I'm
sorry, I don't mean it.

- Okay? I'm sorry.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

I love you.

- What's going on?
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[SNIFFLES]

I think they're okay.

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Hey, Dad!

Dad?

[KEYS CLATTERING]

[SIGHS]

[TENDER MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- Hey.
- Hey, Dad.

- Hey.
- [CHUCKLES]

You know, there's nowhere
to lock up my bike

outside of this frickin' place.

- Oh, that sucks.
- CURTIS: Yeah.

- Hey, did anyone call for me?
- Uh...

no.

Um, not that I know of.

[CHUCKLES]
Oops.

Sorry.

Wow.

What have you been doing in here?

I just kind of unpacked
your kitchen stuff, so...

CURTIS: Yeah, the kitchen looks great.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Spending some time
at your dad's house, huh?

- [LAUGHS SOFTLY]
- So does this mean

that you're gonna make it full-time?

Um, maybe.

CURTIS: I got a surprise for ya.

You know, I think it's gonna
really move that meter

to, uh, I love my dad the most.

Nah, I'm just kidding.

The cheese and corn's not melted,

but I think it'll be fine.

Um...

CURTIS: Smells good.

- Ow.
- Dad...

CURTIS: Ta-da! [LAUGHING]

Da-da-da.

What the f*ck, Anna?

I know, I just... I thought...

- This is my new oven!
- I know, I'm sorry.

- I thought it was glass...
- You know, you don't

put plastic in an oven.

What are you doing?

- I thought it was glass...
- God!

- Ugh.
- I'm sorry...

That's why you don't do this
when I'm not here, okay?

- Okay.
- Here, come on, move.

- Move, move, move.
- Okay.

- You're only...
- Okay!

- [SCOFFS]
- You're only .

I thought it was glass.

[WHISPERING] I was just trying to help.

CURTIS: Ugh.

[CLATTERING IN BACKGROUND]

ANNA: A hamster?

I... I wanted to get
you something so that

when you go back
to your mom's this week

and I'm not with you, you...

you have someone to keep you company.

[PHONE RINGING]

- Anna, the phone.
- Okay, okay!

Got it.

Hi, you've reached the Kones.

This is Anna speaking.
How can I help you?

STEVE: Yo, how can I help you?

- Yo?
- Oh, Steve?

[LAUGHING] Yo.

STEVE: Things may come
to those who wait,

but only the things left
by those who hustle.

- How you been?
- Busy.

[SOFT ROCK MUSIC]

MAYA:
Ah!

Nah! [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Fell.

[SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Mm... I don't know...

I don't know what that means.

No... clothes.

- Um... hot.
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

- Yeah.
- MAYA: [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Mm, me too.

- [LAUGHS]
- [SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Mm...
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