01x02 - Mission 2: Training

[bunniefuu]

-[all chattering] -[Sally] Are we there yet?

Hey, Charlie Brown, how's Snoopy handling his rejection from NASA?

I know how much he wanted to be a famous astronaut.

Actually, he's taking it pretty well.

I think.

[laughing sneakily]

[chattering]

-Hmm. -[stomach grumbling]

My tummy's getting grumbly for astronaut ice cream.

[shouting] Are we there yet?

Almost. I'm so excited, I could scream.

[screams]

You're weird, Marcie.

When we get to the Space Center, I want to find the portrait of Sally Ride, the first American woman in space, and hang my own portrait beside it.

I want to unlock the secrets of the cosmos and answer humankind's greatest questions.

"Why are we here? Are we alone?"

-[monotone] Definitely not. -Aaah!

I want to see the Skylab trainer, and the Apollo 17 command module, and the real Saturn V rocket, and the Apollo 13 lithium hydroxide canister, and...

We're here!

[all] Whoa!

-Yay! -[all] Yay!

Yay--

Snoopy?

[horn honks]

[tires squeal]

Snoopy!

Ha-ha-ha!

-[band playing] -[cheering]

[grunts angrily]

[buzzer sounds]

Aaah!

Ooh!

[grunting]

[person bellows]

-[gasps, sighs] -[Woodstock sighs]

[panting, sighs]

"Johnson Space Center Astronaut Training Facility."

Oh, Snoopy.

I had a feeling you were having trouble taking no for an answer.

[grunting]

[shouting angrily]

I don't think that's gonna work, Snoopy.

This is NASA. They're not gonna let in any people who aren't allowed to be there.

Or any beagles, for that matter.

-Now, how do we get back to the tour? -[buzzer sounds]

Wait for me!

Hey, my dog's in there!

Ow.

-Oh! -Oh!

Ah!

-[alarm ringing] -[gasping]

[gasping]

-[panting] -[Woodstock squeals]

[Woodstock squeaks]

[gasps, whimpers]

Ha-ha!

Hello. I am NASA's Computerized Astronaut Recruitment Adviser, but you may call me CARA.

You must be my latest astronaut trainee, since you made it to this highly secure area.

Huh-huh-huh.

Great, because any unauthorized person caught sneaking into this facility would be in deep trouble.

Like this suspicious character here.

[gulps, whimpers]

Excellent. It's now time to begin your training.

Are you ready to work harder than you've ever worked before?

[gasps, chuckles nervously]

Good! Let's start with some light reading.

Whoa! Real moon rocks!

And moon dust.

[all] Wow!

Can you believe this rock is over 3.8 billion years old?

[gasps, sneezes]

[coughing]

Worth it.

-She sh**t. She scores! -[buzzer sounds]

[whistle blows]

Very unsportsmanlike, sir.

Hey, where's Charlie Brown?

Do you think he's having as much fun as we are?

[thunderclap]

Hello!

As an astronaut, you'll need to solve complex problems at a moment's notice.

Huh, huh, huh.

[beeping]

Time's up.

Ma-ta!

-Hmm. -[chirping]

Working in space can be quite rigorous.

It's time for the endurance portion of your training.

Recruit?

Ahh. [gulps]

Ahh.

That is not what I meant by endurance.

Recruit, recruit, recruit.

I am not impressed by your performance so far.

But there is still time to turn things around and around and around!

Because it's time for your high g-force centrifuge training. [chuckles]

[robotically] This is my favorite part. [laughing]

This machine simulates the extreme pressure you will feel on your body as you launch into space.

This will be incredibly uncomfortable, so try and relax.

[sighs]

-[bell chimes] -[chatters]

No, you cannot have a pillow.

Now, you'll notice the speed increasing as--

[chatters]

No, there is no beverage service.

[bell chimes]

[chatters]

Or hot towels.

[chatters]

Or chocolate chip cookies!

-[bell chimes] -[chatters]

-No! No. -[chatters]

-No. No! -[chatters]

No! Enough!

It appears you do not have what it takes to be an astronaut after all.

Aaah!

I try to be a responsible dog owner, but no one ever tells you what to do when your dog sneaks into a secure government facility so he can try and be an astronaut.

[sighs]

-[whistling] -[groans]

Snoopy! Boy, am I glad to see you.

[crying]

[chomps]

[howls, crying]

Good grief.