01x04 - The You You Are

[bunniefuu]

"All I can be is sorry,
and that is all I am."

But I'm afraid you still don't mean it.

We'll try again in the morning.

[BEEPS]

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

See you tomorrow, Helly.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[BREATHES SHAKILY]

f*ck me.

I read it times yesterday.

. Again, please. Now.

[MUFFLED SPEAKING]

What the hell is that voice?

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

[BREATHING DEEPLY]

[HELLY] "Forgive me for the harm
I have caused this world.

None may atone for my actions but me."

[CRYING] "And only in me
shall their stain live on."

[MUFFLED SPEAKING CONTINUES]

I really am sorry, okay?

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

I'm sorry.

No paraphrasing. Again.

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic ed.com

[VIBRATING]

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

[SIGHS]

- Mark?
- Yep?

It's past , and Helly's been
in the break room since yesterday.

- Okay?
- I wonder if, as department chief,

you feel you should
check on her progress?

- Well...
- Mark doesn't have that power.

- Well, he can ask.
- He's not going to.

- He might.
- Okay...

Hi.

I'm so sorry to interrupt.

We met the other day.
I'm Burt from Optics and Design.

- Hi, Irving.
- Hi, Burt. What are you doing here?

Exactly how the wet f*ck do you know

- where this office is?
- Dylan!

My... My predecessor, Alice K.,

came here
once when they still did the summits,

- and she'd left directions.
- Give us them reversed.

[MARK] Okay. It's all right.

What can we do for you, Burt?

Thank you. Well...

Irving, I kept thinking
about what you said

about being excited
for the new handbook totes,

and maybe you were kidding and teasing.

No, not at all.

Okay, good. I've been fretting,
though, because you mentioned

the anticipation could distract
from your work,

which was the opposite of my intent.

So I figured, heck,
let's bring them over now.

That way, it won't be on your mind.

You brought pre-release handbook totes
for us?

It seemed like the right thing.
I know your time is valuable.

Okay, well, you can drop 'em on
the desk. Long hike back to O&D.

Right.

I also wanted to extend an invitation.

Again, I know you...
you work hard, so...

if an informal tour of O&D
ever sounds refreshing,

I'd be happy to personally offer that
to Irving and any one of you.

Directions are in the front bag,
reversed.

Hard pass.

[BURT EXHALES SHARPLY] Okay.

[IRVING] Thank you, Burt.

Thank you.

Just seems soon to be
taking him up on his offer.

It's absurd we've never visited them
before now.

Kier's whole original vision saw
us all working together.

That was before O&D started
disemboweling people's bowels.

[IRVING] Nonsense. I'll be back by : .

- He's gonna die.
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

Irv...

How many times?

, .

What about the voice behind the door?

Crying baby, you mean?

No. Like, the angry, mumbly guy.

Guys? We're really not supposed to talk
about the break room.

You know, the important thing is,

you apologized correctly,
and now you're out.

What you gotta do is trick the machine

by thinking about something
you're really sorry about,

so I like to imagine my outie's
love-made with a MILF or two,

which is obviously badass,
but I do pity the husbands.

[MARK] Hey.

Break room sucks.

But that's why we have protocols
and procedures

so we don't end up there.

You'll learn. I promise.

Hello?

Who's that?

Oh, hi.

It's Irving B.
From Macrodata Refinement.

We met in the hall the other day.

Burt's over there by shelf six.

Don't touch anything.

The big envelopes can handle
an appendix reissue.

But, of course,
we ship all the hallway pieces in-frame.

Huh. So much to remember.

Felicia and I make do.

I'm sure it's easier than whatever
you MDR kids get up to all day.

I can only imagine what it's like
when the new art comes in.

I mean, you see it before anyone.

It's so dumb, but I actually cried

when you guys put up
The Youthful Convalescence of Kier.

- No.
- I did.

I never thought I'd see
the handbook passage depicted visually.

It was only up for a month or so,
but, man. What a month.

Come here.

Once the hall art's been cycled
through all the departments,

it ends up back here.

Wow!

Where did Felicia go?

Supply run.

Voilà.

"Let not weakness live in your veins.

Cherished workers, drown it inside you."

"Rise up from your deathbed
and sally forth,

more perfect for the struggle."

Exactly.

I...

I can't believe you...

You have this.

I'm sorry. What time is it?

I have to go.

Hey, Helly.

- I got to %.
- Yes!

Feels good, right?

- I guess.
- Awesome. I'm glad you agree.

Great work.

Hmm.

What's this?

Will you put that away?

- Put what away?
- It's a map of the hallways.

No, it isn't.

Mmm, I thought we weren't
supposed to make maps.

We're not. I didn't.
It's just something I found.

I think Petey made it.

Oh, sh*t. You didn't turn it in?

- [SIGHS]
- You're such a hypocrite,

lecturing me on following the rules.

I wasn't lecturing you.

I'm just trying
to keep you out of the break room.

I can't believe Petey was a mapper.
Let me see it.

He's got wellness, management,
perpetuity... Everywhere we know of.

This must've taken him weeks.

Why aren't we supposed
to map the office?

It's an Eagan rule.
"Render not my creation in miniature."

Why?

What the f*ck is this?

They look like houses, right?
That's how houses look.

Yeah, exactly,
because these are random, bored doodles.

Well, maybe they're on the outside

and Petey found a way to get to them.

So why would they be on a map
of the severed floor?

It could be a thing. You don't know.

It's not a thing.

Clearly he was trying
to tell you something.

Uh, no.

Go lick a boot, Mark.

You're more loyal to this place
than to your friend.

I'm loyal to how it felt around here
before you showed up.

You mean when Petey was here?

Yeah, because there was balance.

We could have fun and work without
the whole g*dd*mn department imploding.

The work is bullshit.

The work is mysterious and important.

And we deal with
the uncertainty it brings us

in the way that Kier would've wanted.

Together, as a family.

I could not, with a razor to my throat,

be less interested in being your family.

Your best friend left this for you,
and you don't give a sh*t.

You're right. I don't give a sh*t.

Mark...

There. It's gone. Thank you, Helly.
Now we can get back to work.

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

Mark!

It's an emergency.

[MARK, SIGHING] Okay. Uh, all right...

I was going to get Mr. Milchick,

but I thought it best
not to break the chain of command.

[CHUCKLES] It's just raining
contraband today.

- What do you mean?
- It doesn't matter.

Has anyone seen
anything like this before?

Passage , page .

"Be content in my words,

and dally not in the scholastic
pursuits of lesser men."

No books except the handbook. I know.

[IRVING] What are you doing?

His ego's pissed 'cause
Helly called him out for boot-licking.

- My ego's fine. I'm just trying to...
- Damn.

[IRVING] Mark, what is this?

Maybe it's another Petey message.
Flip through. See if my name's anywhere.

I bet it's a loyalty test.

Remember the spicy candy?

I'll be turning this in to Milchick.

What? Why? It's booty.
It's booty with your name on it.

Excellent decision, Mark.

This is an idolatrous text that
should be brought to him immediately.

So what's their space like?
Stalactites and sh*t?

No, it's nice. Burt's fostered
a really welcoming environment.

He understands the spirit of Lumon.

Helly?

- [DOOR SLAMS]
- [MR. MILCHICK] Excuse me! Helly!

[MS. COBEL] Jesus, Helly!

I want a camera!

- I am so sorry, Ms. Cobel. I will...
- What is happening here?

What's happening is,
you're going to give me a video camera

so I can tape a resignation to my outie
right f*cking now,

or you're going to have to explain
to her

why she's missing four fingers.

Okay. Let's just... [EXHALES SHARPLY]

[HELLY] It's Cobel, right?

[MS. COBEL] Yes.

Cobel, do I look like
I'm f*cking around right now?

No. No, you do not.

[MARK] Helly!

[MS. COBEL] Hi, Mark.
I'm just catching up with your trainee.

Mr. Milchick,

could you get the video camera, please?

[VIDEO CAMERA BEEPS]

[BEEPS]

Hey.

[BEEPS]

Well, boss. I guess this is the part
where I should tell you to go to hell.

Except you're already here.

I was never sorry.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

[SIGHS]

[HELLY] Helly,

I watched your video
asking that I resign.

I also received and responded
to your previous request.

I assumed that would resolve the issue,

but now Ms. Cobel says
you threatened to cut off your fingers?

I understand that you're unhappy
with the life that you've been given.

But you know what? Eventually,
we all have to accept reality.

So, here it is.

I am a person.

You are not.

I make the decisions.

You do not.

And if you ever do
anything to my fingers,

know that I will keep you alive
long enough to horribly regret that.

Your resignation request is denied.

Turn it off.

[MARK] "Welcome your child
into a world surrounded by nature."

No, thanks. Uh...

"Scroll down to explore
our rustic birthing cabins."

Uh, I don't know. It just, uh...

It looks more like a shitty ski resort

than a birthing center to me, but...

[SIBLING] Okay, sure, fine.

But it's gonna be awesome.
And you're gonna like it.

How much of this was Ricken's idea,
% or %?

[CHUCKLES] Just...

Get all of your snark out now

or you're never gonna
earn your uncle badge.

You know what? I think I might have
some more snark in me.

I'm kinda tired.

- Call you tomorrow?
- Okay, bye.

[CELL PHONE CHIMES]

[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]

Have you heard from the Board yet?

No.

Kilmer wasn't your fault,
and it certainly wasn't mine.

They'll understand.

It wasn't your fault, Harmony.

If you want a hug,
go to hell and find your mother.

[GRANER] Jesus.

Since Petey reintegrated...

The Board's never acknowledged
reintegration.

We have to get his chip.

His corpse is scheduled to be destroyed
by cremation

following his funeral on Sunday.

FYI.

Vision.

Verve.

Wit.

Cheer.

Humility.

Benevolence.

Nimbleness.

Probity.

Wiles.

Wiles.

Mark.

Mrs. Selvig?

- What are you doing here?
- Wh...

I... I'm... You know, the...

the news
report said that he worked at Lumon,

so I thought maybe I... I... I knew him.
What are you doing here?

Oh, he used to come by my shop.
He adored my hibiscus wrap.

Oh, my God. Wow, it's a small world.

Oh, poor, poor man.

Well, on the upside, at least
now we both have a date. [LAUGHS]

Oh, there he is.

If you'd like to go in
and pay your respects,

I'll wait right here for you.

I think I might swing by the bathroom,
but, uh, I'll see you in a sec.

- Service is starting soon.
- [MARK] Yeah.

Uh, whiskey. Rocks.

Ah, it's just wine, sir.

Right. Uh, red, please.

[BREATHES DEEPLY]

Hello. Were you a friend?

He was my dad.

Oh, I'm so deeply sorry.

I suppose you were close
and everything, hmm?

White, please. [SIGHS]

I'm sorry, I don't know you. I'm Nina.

Oh, uh, Mark Scout.

I'm Peter's ex-wife.

Oh, yeah, sure. Sorry. [STAMMERS]

You're from Lumon.

So you didn't even know him at all.

- I just figured I knew him, and...
- [JUNE] Hey, Mom.

They wanna start.

[NINA] Okay, baby.

Hi. You're, uh... Are you June?

Yeah.

It's nice to meet you.

So you knew my dad?

Um, yeah.

At work.

Oh. You're one of those.

Do you ever think that maybe

the best way to deal
with a f*cked-up situation in your life

isn't to just shut your brain off
half the time?

I'm not exactly sure.

- [VIDEO STARTS PLAYING]
- I'm sorry.

[PETEY] We're gonna perform
something for you.

[JUNE CHUCKLES]

[PETEY] I'm glad you're here, babe.

We're gonna play a... We're gon...
We're gonna melt your face off.

- We're gonna rock to it.
- Gonna play some rock and roll.

[PETEY] Rock show time!

[GUITAR PLAYING]

♪ Say your prayers, little one ♪

♪ Don't forget, my son ♪

♪ To include everyone ♪

♪ Tuck you in, warm within ♪

♪ Keep you free from sin ♪

♪ Till the sandman, he comes ♪

♪ Sleep with one eye open ♪

♪ Gripping your pillow tight ♪

♪ Exit light ♪

♪ Enter night ♪

♪ Grain of sand ♪

♪ We're off to never-never land ♪

♪ Something's wrong, shut the light ♪

♪ Heavy thoughts tonight
And they aren't of Snow White ♪

♪ Dreams of w*r, dreams of liars ♪

♪ Dreams of dragon's fire ♪

♪ And of things that will bite ♪

♪ Sleep with one eye open ♪

[JUNE CLEARS THROAT]

♪ Gripping your pillow tight ♪

♪ Exit light ♪

♪ Enter night ♪

♪ Take my hand ♪

♪ We're off to never-never land ♪

♪ I pray the Lord my soul to keep ♪

♪ I pray the Lord my soul to keep ♪

♪ And if I die before I wake ♪

[JUNE] ♪ And if I die before I wake ♪

♪ I pray the Lord my soul to take ♪

[JUNE] ♪ I pray the
Lord my soul to take ♪

♪ Hush, little baby, don't say a word ♪

♪ And never mind that noise you heard ♪

- ♪ It's just the monster under your bed ♪
- [DRILL WHIRRING]

- ♪ In your closet, in your head ♪
- ♪ In your head ♪

♪ Exit light ♪

♪ Enter night ♪

♪ Grain of sand ♪

♪ We're off to never-never land ♪

[JUNE EXCLAIMS]

[PETEY SHOUTS, LAUGHS]

- No!
- [JUNE LAUGHING]

[PETEY, JUNE LAUGH]

No! [LAUGHING]

What... What if you went
so fast that smoke started coming out?

[JUNE] Out of your ears.

[JUNE, PETEY LAUGH]

[PETEY, JUNE CONTINUE, INDISTINCT]

Mark, sweetheart, are you all right?
I'm so sorry.

- Yeah.
- I think I have this cystitis under...

[MARK] This was a mistake. I have to go.

- Okay, well, let me come with you.
- No, that's not necessary.

- No, I've paid my respects. Let's go.
- [PRIEST] Let us pray.

Our Father, who art in heaven...

So, was the funeral just too sad, or...

Uh, something like that, yeah.

If you ever wanna talk...

Oh, no. Thank you. I just... I'm fine.

But thank you for, you know,
being my funeral buddy today.

[CHUCKLES] Good night.

Good night.

[CAR APPROACHES]

[SNIFFLING]

That's Petey?

That's Petey.

How did you...

Would you mind taking that
up to diagnostics for me?

[KNOCKING]

Yes?

[DOOR CLOSES]

You requested me, Ms. Cobel?

Ms. Casey, I'd like you to run
a special wellness session with Mark S.

Mark S.?

What's the problem?

He just needs it. Trust me.

[WATER RUNNING]

"Kier invites you to
drink of his water."

- Irving.
- Felicia said you'd be here.

Mmm.

Is it awful to say
I don't care for that one?

No.

Honestly, it makes me nervous too.
Uh-huh.

Such a lovely vista,
but I keep thinking...

[IRVING] He could slip.

[BURT] Ah. Mmm.

It was a thrill to have someone from MDR
come see us,

to take an interest like you did, so...

if I embarrassed myself...

You didn't.

- Hmm?
- Unless, you did?

Are you embarrassed?

No.

Good.

I have four more stops.

Would MDR consider joining me?

MDR would.

You're crazy.

I wish I could nap.

I think I sleep
hours a night up there.

It's a character flaw.

It just means you're a party guy,
disco king.

I can't be falling asleep, Burt.

- Who cares?
- The handbook cares.

"No workplace
shall be repurposed for slumber."

I know the handbook, old man.
I'm more of a first edition guy.

The original word of Kier:

"And I shall
whisper to ye dutiful through the ages.

In your noblest thoughts and epiphanies
shall be my voice.

You are my mouth,

and through ye, I will whisper on

when I am centuries demised."

I don't understand.

He doesn't just speak to us
through the handbook or the paintings.

He finds other ways.

[MARK] "You think you need your job.

But I've lived abroad as a vagrant,

abstaining from my own money
to rely on the charity of strangers.

Most were beggars themselves,
yet they were happy.

And so, for that summer, was I.

Your job needs you,

not the other way around."

[BURT] Safe travels, MDR.

Thanks, O&D.

[DOOR OPENS]

Mark?

I'm gonna go.

Do it.

I'm working up till the bell.

I think
I may still crush this thing tonight.

I hope you do.

See you soon.

Knew it.

Sometimes I ask people
to sculpt how they feel out of clay.

Would you like to do that?

[MARK] All right.

[SIGHS]

[BEEPS]

"'Destiny'. An acrostic poem experience
by the author, Ricken Hale."

[MACHINERY CLICKING, WHIRRING]

[DYLAN] "D is for dreaming,
the start of it all."

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

"E is for energy...

breaking down walls.

S is for stewardship,

- of home and of earth."
- [CLICKING, WHIRRING CONTINUES]

"T is for terror,
which gives us more worth.

I is for eyes,

which observe us with love.

Until N, meaning newness,

rains down from above.

And Y.

That's a question we needn't now ponder.

For destiny, friends,
shall deliver all yonder."

Hey. How are you?

Good.

Yeah? Seems like
you're getting the hang of stuff here.

Cool.