05x16 - Fred's Flying Lesson

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Flintstones". Aired: September 30, 1960 – April 1, 1966.*
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Living in Bedrock, Fred Flintstone works an unsatisfying job, but returns home to his wife Wilma and eventually daughter Pebbles.
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05x16 - Fred's Flying Lesson

Post by bunniefuu »

And now, fellow members

Of the loyal order
of water buffaloes,

The moment we've all
been waiting for.

[Cheering]

As your exalted
Grand Poobah,

It is my privilege
to draw the winning names

In our magnificent
fund-Raising contest.

Hooray!

Here we go, Fred.

This may be
our lucky day.

I hope so, Barney.

A couple more
of these raffle tickets,

And I'll be able
to wallpaper the house.

Yeah, that makes
two of us.

Heh heh heh heh.

[Toot]

Yabba-Dabba-Doo!

Flintstones,
meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Let's ride with the family
down the street

Through the courtesy
of Fred's two feet

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba-Dabba-Doo
time

A dabba-Doo time

We'll have
a gay old time

Alright, oscar,
roll 'em.

The only reason
I got this job

Is I happen to have
big feet.

And now the first
grand prize--

An all-Expense-Paid
vacation for two

To Hollowstone
National Park--

Goes to
Charlie Marblehead.

Yay!

Uh, pardon me.

I won! I won!

Uh, pardon me,
pardon me.

Nuts.

Wouldn't you know it?
The richest guy in town.

Second prize--

A complete hi-Fidelity,
studiophonic sound system,

From rock-A-Rolla,
the greatest name in noise.

And the winner is
Irving Pinecone.

Yay!

Ah ha ha ha!

I won! I won!

Ha ha ha ha!

I don't know, Fred.

Guess this isn't
our lucky day after all.

Can you imagine pinecone
winning a stereo?

What does he know
about good music?

And now, fellow members,
third prize--

This might be it,
Fred.

A lovely 17-Rock

Shockproof, waterproof,
sundial wristwatch--

Guaranteed to work
underwater,

And the lucky winner
is Harley Rockbottom.

Hooray!

Well, that's the old
ballgame, Fred.

It's a frame-Up.

And now last
but not least,

Our special added
bonus prize--

One free flying lesson,

Courtesy of the Bedrock
Flying School--

And the winner is

Our one and only
Fred Flintstone.

[Cheering]

Fred Flintstone. Ha!

H-Hey, that's me!

Hey, did you hear that,
Barney? Ha ha ha!

Yabba-Dabba-Doo!
I won!

I won! Ha!
Yabba-Dabba-Doo-Doo-Doo!

I finally won something,
barn.

Yabba-Dabba-Doo!

Nice going, Fred.

Gee, I never expected
anything.

Yeah, I know.

Hey, wait a minute.
One free lesson?

That's
a terrible prize.

Well, that's better
than nothing, Fred.

Are you kidding?
What am I going to do

With one flying lesson?

Hey, maybe they'll
let you cash it in.

I think you've got
something there, barn.

Sure. If it's worth
10 bucks,

I can buy
a new bowling ball.

Why don't we stop at
the Idlerock Airport tomorrow

After work
and cash it in?

Barney, old pal,
you are a genius.

It's coming in
for a landing.

Some crate,
huh, Fred?

I'll say.
You wouldn't catch me

Flying one
of those things.

My name is
Fred Flintstone,

And I'm looking
for the owner

Of this flying school.

I'm Kitty Rockhawk.
I run the flying school.

You see, I'm a--Tootle,
uh, biddle--

[Speaking gibberish]

Watch out, Fred.
You're losing altitude.

Mr. Flintstone,
you have the look

of an eagle
in your eyes.

Uh, e-Eagle?

You have the spirit
of a hawk in your heart.

Uh, yeah.

Rrawk! Rrawk!
Rrawk! Rrawk!

Hey, Fred,
you better tell her

Why you're here
before you take off.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

To tell the truth,
miss Rockhawk--

Yes?

I, uh, just won
a free flying lesson

Down at
the lodge, and...

you can't wait
to get into the air.

I can't wait to get
into the air.

In fact,
you want to sign up

For my special
five-Lesson plan, don't you?

I want to sign up for your
five-Lesson special plan.

Oh, come on, Fred,
snap out of it.

You're supposed to be
cashing in your prize.

Remember?

Uh, you're absolutely
right, Barney.

I'm here to get
the money.

Miss rockhawk--

You were saying...
wings?

Duh...

duh, where can I
sign up

For those flying lessons?

Right this way, wings.

Then saturday morning,
it's you and me...

up there.

Boy, what a birdbrain.

Look at it this way,
Barney,

Becoming a pilot
is an investment.

I don't get it, Fred.

Don't you see, barn? Once
I get my pilot's license,

I'll go to work for
prehistoric airlines.

You--An airline pilot?

I can see it now, Barn.

This is your pilot,
captain Fred Flintstone.

Welcome aboard
flight 32.

We'll be traveling at
an altitude of 520 feet

At a speed of about
45 miles an hour,

Which should get us
into Idlerock field

At 6:15
central cave time.

Uh, excuse me, captain,

But what's Wilma going
to say about all this?

[Foot brakes squeal]

Wilma?
I almost forgot.

Ooh, she'll clobber me
if she finds out

I'm taking
flying lessons.

And I hate to think
what she'll do to you

when she sees
your flying teacher.

Well, barn, I'll just
have to risk it.

After all, I'm doing it
for Wilma and Pebbles.

And, uh, how are you
going to work it, Fred?

It's a cinch.

Instead of going
to bowling practice,

I'll take
the flying lessons.

And you're going
to help me.

Oh, I knew
there was a catch to it.

Pilot to Pebbles.
Pilot to Pebbles.

The field has just
been cleared.

A-Okay for landing.

[Imitates
airplane motor]

Ooh!

Rrrroooooommm!

Ha ha!

Whee!

Zoo!

How do you like that,
pebbly-Poo?

A perfect
3-Point landing.

A-Ba-Ba!

Ha ha ha!
Goodnight, sweetheart.

Now, maybe tomorrow night,
we'll fly to the moon.

Ohh! Ha ha!

Ha ha ha!

[Humming]

Oh, dear.
There goes the light.

Fred, can you change
the light for me?

Right-O, honey.

I'll have it changed

In two shakes
of a dinosaur's tail.

My goodness, but you're
full of pep tonight.

I just hope
you save some energy

For our picnic
with the rubbles tomorrow.

Picnic?

Yes.
Don't you remember?

You promised us
last week.

Oh, that picnic.

Well, gee, Wilma,
I hate to tell you this,

But I don't think
I can make it tomorrow.

Ah-Ah-Choo!

I'm sorry, Wilma,

But if I miss my bowling
practice tomorrow,

I am off the team.

But you promised.

The kids have been gurgling
about it all week long.

Ah-Choo!

Could I help it
if I got a cold?

I'm sorry, Wilma. I'm going
to bowling practice,

And that is final.

I'm putting my foot down
on any further discussion.

I'll say this much
for you, Fred.

When you put your foot down,
you put your foot down.

[Clanging]

[Rrawk]

Just a minute, Betty.
The kettle's boiling.

Oh, Fred!
Before you go,

Can you fix
the baby's bottle?

I'm on the phone.

Sure thing, Wilma.

Come fly with me
in my flying machine

And up we go

Up we go

It's about time.

30 seconds more,

And I'd have been
a cooked goose.

Anyway, Betty, Fred can't
make the picnic today.

Seems his bowling
is more important.

Oh, Barney, too, huh?

It figures.

Bottle's all set, honey.

I'm leaving now,
sweetheart.

Well, talk to you
later, Betty.

Thanks, Fred.
Have a nice game.

I will. I will.

Heh heh heh heh.

Well, this is it, wings.

In another hour,
you'll be flying high.

Yeah, but what about
tomorrow's lesson?

The girls
won't stand for us

Canceling out
the picnic again.

Gee. Too bad you can't
take all the lessons

In one day.

Ah, not a bad idea,
Barney-Boy.

That way I can
start flying

For the airline
on monday.

Ha ha ha ha!

All five flying lessons
in one day?

That's right.
I'm in a big hurry

To get my pilot's
license by monday.

Okay, wings,
anything you say.

Yabba-Dabba-Doo!

Let's get this show
in the air.

Now, the first thing we do
is check you out

On the latest
in safety devices.

It's called
an ejection seat.

Check.

If the plane's in trouble,
all you have to do

Is pull that little lever
by your, uh, left knee.

Gotcha.

Just pull this little
lever...like this.

Well, so much
for lesson one.

Idlerock control tower

To bedrock flying school
flight number one,

You're cleared for takeoff
on runway 3.

All set, wings?

Are you kidding? I'm
already on cloud nine.

Ha ha!

Okay. Contact.

[Engine starts]

Hang on tight.

Oh, boy, look at those
people down there.

They look like ants.

Those are ants.

We're not even
off the ground yet.

Whoops.
Sorry. Ha ha!

Now for lesson
number three--

It's called stalling.

Hey!

Ooh! Hey!

What do you think
of that, wings?

I think we'd better cancel
the rest of the lessons.

But what about
your new career?

Monday, remember?

Well, okay, as long
as I've gotten this far.

Brace yourself
for lesson number four.

Yeow!

Ooh!

This is called
the acrobatic flying roll.

Yeah, it figures,

Only which way
is up?

Ha ha ha ha!

Attaboy, Fred.

Wilma's in for a surprise,
alright.

Yoo-Hoo! Barney!
Oh, Barney rubble!

Uh-Oh.
Hilda Rockmouth,

The biggest gossip
in town.

Oh, hi, there, Hilda.

What in the world

Are you doing out here
at the airport?

Oh, nothing much. Just
watching all the planes go by.

That's funny.

Betty told me you and Fred
were at bowling practice.

Uh, Fred?
Who's Fred?

Hey, Barney!
Yabba-Dabba-Doo!

Look, barn!
No hands!

Ho ho ho ho!

Oh, Mr. Flintstone,
you're so daring!

Well!

Oh, boy, there goes
big mouth rockmouth.

Uh-Oh,
look who's coming.

Big mouth rockmouth.

Yeah, we better scram
out of here.

Remember what happened
to us last time?

[Yakking]

Both: ow!

I told ya,
I told ya.

[Yakking]

Fred Flintstone?
Are you sure?

A beautiful blonde, eh?

Well, thanks, Betty.

Hang up. I got
to make a call. Bye.

Oh, wait till I tell
mabel marblehead

About Fred flintsto--

Hey, wait a minute.

Fred Flintstone?
That's my husband!

How do you like
my teaching so far, tiger?

Rowrr!

Bring on
the fifth lesson.

All we have to do now
is bring the plane in

For a perfect
three-Point landing.

Think can you do it?

Are you kidding?

The future captain
of prehistoric airlines?

Why, it'll be a breeze.
Here we go.

Careful, Fred!

I told you it'd be
a breeze, huh, kitty?

Fred!
Fred, look out!

There we are.
Smooth as silk.

Right, kitty?

Kitty!

I guess they don't
make silk

As smooth
as they used to.

Fred, Fred, the brake!
Use the brake!

Oh, yeah, yeah,
the brake.

[Struggling]

Nice going, Fred.

When you finish something,
you sure finish with a bang.

Well, look who's
here--A land person.

How do you do,
Fred?

Don't look now, Barney,

But you are looking
at a genuine

Full-Blooded
licensed pilot.

Sorry to put you
into a tailspin, wings,

But you've got
to solo first.

What?

You've got to solo,

Then you'll get
your pilot's license.

Oh.

See you bright and early
tomorrow morning.

Toodle-Oo, wings!

Barney, that
solo flight tomorrow
sure messes things up.

Well, I got to shake you
up some more, Fred.

Hilda Rockmouth saw you
flying with Kitty Rockhawk.

Hilda Rockmouth!

And you know what
a big mouth she has.

I know, I know.
Hey! Hold that ferry!

Hey, that reminds me,
Barney.

You got any change?

Uh, yeah, yeah.
Sure, Fred.

Thanks, Barney.

I wish he'd use
his credit card.

It would make
my job a lot easier.

I guess
you better call kitty

And cancel
that solo flight.

Yeah, yeah.
Hey, wait a minute.

If I pass the test
tomorrow,

I'll be
a full-Fledged pilot.

Oh, sure, but
if Wilma finds out,

You'll be doing a solo
without a plane.

Not if I show up monday
in the blue and gold

Captain's uniform
of prehistoric airlines.

I don't know, Fred.

What are we going to tell
Wilma and Betty

About being out
at the airport today?

Just leave that to me,
Barney-Boy.

That's exactly
what I'm afraid of.

Here they are now,
Wilma.

Ah, let's see them talk
their way out of this one.

Yeah, let's.

Hiya, girls.
What's new?

I don't know, Fred.
You tell us.

Barney: uh-Oh.
I knew it, I knew it.

How was bowling
today?

Yeah. How?

To tell you the truth,

We didn't go bowling
today.

I was out at the airport
taking a flying lesson.

Right, Barney?

Well, yeah,
that's right, I think.

What?

I might as well
level with you, Wilma.

I won a free flying lesson
at our last lodge meeting.

But--


I couldn't help
myself, Wilma.

You know how I hate
to waste anything.

But--

Boy, you should've
seen my teacher--

A beautiful blonde
who could fly the toupee

Off a bald eagle.

But--

If you don't believe me,

Just ask hilda rockmouth.

She was there.

Now, how about dinner?
I am starved.

Oh, yes, Fred.

Oh, anything you say,
dear.

Ho ho ho ho!

Heh heh heh heh.

You see how easy
it is, barn?

Just tell them the truth.
It never fails.

Yeah.
Oh, Betty?

Yes, Barney. One dinner
coming right up.

Fred, I always said
you were a genius.

Well, see you
at the picnic tomorrow.

What a day
for a picnic!

Well, you don't have
to shout about it.

Oh, sorry, Fred.

Fred, I still don't
understand

How could you pick the airport
for a place to picnic.

Wouldn't
a nice quiet place

Beside a babbling brook
be better?

Oh, don't be silly.

The kids love airplanes.
Look!

[Babbling]

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

[Arr arr arr]

[Harr harr harr]

Heh heh. Not a bad day
for soloing either, eh, Barney?

Yeah, Fred. Looks like your
genius is showing again.

Ha ha ha ha!

See that, Pebbles?
That's a fantail jet.

[Babbling]

Sure is
a beautiful sight.

Goo goo goo!

Isn't that cute,
Barney?

Pebbles wants
to play with Bamm-Bamm.

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Okay, sweetheart, you can
play with bamm-Bamm.

Just stay close
to mommy.

Keep an eye on them,
Wilma.

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Look at that, Fred.
A perfect gentleman.

Ha ha ha ha!

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Okay, Barney,
the kids are occupied.

Wilma and Betty are busy
cooking. Now is the time.

I'm with you, Fred.

Let's see, now.
The flying school

Is on the other side
of the airport.

Figure two minutes
to get there,

Ten minutes to solo,

One minute to get
my license validated,

And two minutes
to get back.

Fifteen minutes
on the nose.

Yeah, the girls
will never miss us.

Let's go.

All set, wings?

Check. I'm going
to solo this crate

Like it's never
been soloed before.

Remember
your instructions.

Circle the field twice,
then bring it in.

And don't forget,

Stay away
from the army base.

It's a restricted area.

Roger.

Solo flight number one
cleared for takeoff

On runways
2, 3, 4, 5, and 6.

Ha ha ha ha!

Solo flight number one
to control tower,

Very funny.

Very funny.

Well, here goes.

Contact.

I made it, I made it!

So far so good, Fred.

Barney, what are you
doing here?

Helping you solo.
What else?

Aw, gee, thanks, barn.

How do you like it,
Barney-Boy?

Beautiful,
just beautiful.

Uh-Oh.
Enemy at 12:00.

What enemy?

That's a dodo bird,
you knucklehead.

Boy, I'm pooped.

Hey, cut that out!

Get off of my wing!

Shoo! Scat! Scram!

Hey, Fred, remember
lesson number four,

The acrobatic
flying roll?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Gee, thanks, Barney.

Oh, don't mention it,
Fred.

[Radar beeps]

Unidentified
flying object

Approaching
from the west, sir.

Probably one of
those student pilots

From the flying school.

Should I make
radio contact, sir?

I'll do that,
corporal.

I've got to break them of
this habit once and for all.

This is general
wuntious stonewall

Calling unidentified
aircraft.

Please identify.
Over.

Don't look now, Fred, but
that enemy dodo bird is back.

I repeat--
Ufo, please identify. Over.

Oh, boy,
that dumb bird

Made us fly over
the restricted area.

Get him off of here,
quick!

We're
way off course.

Right-O, Fred.

I'll scare him
with this big rock.

Bombs away.

Oops!
I dropped it!

Did I hear him say
bombs away, sir?

Don't be silly,
corporal,

This is peacetime.

Sound the alarm!

This means w*r!

[Aaaaaaaahhhh]

I wonder what
the commotion is about?

I don't know,

But have you seen
Fred and Barney lately?

Come to think of it, no.

Maybe we should
go and look for them.

I think
you're right, Betty.

Let's get the children.

Commence f*ring!

Hey, Barney, where'd
you get all those rocks?

It's not me, Fred.
It must be somebody else.

Gee, all this fuss

Over a little
one-Minute rest stop.

I'm getting out
of here.

Fire the xtw15!

5...4...3...2...

1...0!

No! No!

Step on it, Fred.

Faster, Fred!

Not bad for a beginner,
huh, Barney?

Yeah, Fred. You sure
gave him the slip.

Barney!

Huh?
You called, Fred?

Barney, you get in here
before you get hurt.

Coming right up, Fred.

We'd better get out of
this restricted area fast.

Hang on, Barney,
I'll put her in a dive!

Uh-Oh.

Yeow!

Ooh, he pulled
the ejector stick.

Hey, Fred, Fred,
come back!

How do you fly
this thing?

Look, Wilma, somebody's
coming down by parachute.

That's
no somebody.

That's Fred.

What's he doing
up there?

Heh heh heh heh.
Hiya, girls.

Just thought
I'd drop in on you.

Very funny.

And where, pray tell,
is Barney?

[Muffled]
I left him up there.

You left him up there
by himself?

Look!

Hey, Fred, how do you
work this thing? Hey!

Don't worry,
Barney, old boy!

I'll talk you in!

Excuse me, pal,
but this is an emergency.

Control tower
calling Barney.

This is Fred.
Can you hear me, Barney?

Barney:
harry--Uh, frank,

Uh, joe--
Uh, pete.

Barney, the word
is roger.

Oh. Roger.

Now listen to me.
Keep your nose up.

Check, Fred.

Not your nose,
you knucklehead!

The plane's nose!

Oh. Sorry, Fred.

Now pull the stick
back easy.

Get that nose up
and cut your motor.

Gotcha.

You're almost
on the runway.

Hold it steady.

Attaboy!

Barney, be careful.

Easy does it, Barney.

Ooh, I can't look.

[Crash]

He made it!
Yahoo!

He made it!

He made it!

Yeah.

Oh, Fred's wonderful.

Oh, I didn't think
Barney could do it.

You alright,
Barney?

A-Okay, Fred.

Hey, what do you know?
I soloed.

Yeah, and I'm without
a pilot's license.

Don't fret over it,
wings.

You were brilliant

The way you talked
your friend in.

Well...

and that was
some job of flying,

You little rascal,
you.

Will somebody tell me
what this is all about?

I'd like to know,
too.

Well, uh...

you see...
you tell them, Barney.

Well, uh...

you'd better
tell them, Fred.

What they're trying
to say is that wings here--

I mean mr. Flintstone--

Was trying to build
a new career.

What?

That's right.

He wanted to become
an airline pilot,

So you and
your baby daughter

Would be proud of him.

Fred, I'm proud of you
just the way you are.

Well, I'm glad you feel
that way, Wilma,

Because from now on,

I am keeping
my feet on the ground.

And so is Barney.

You can say that again.

I don't know if you can say
as much for your children.

Hey, look at Bamm-Bamm.
He's flying.

Brr!

[Pebbles giggles]

Flintstones,
meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Someday, maybe Fred
will win the fight

Then that cat will
stay out for the night

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba-Dabba-Doo time

A dabba-Doo time

We'll have a gay old time

We'll have a gay old time

Wilma!
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