05x03 - Naming Names

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Party of Five". Aired: September 12, 1994 – May 3, 2000.*
Watch/Buy Amazon


After their parents die in a car accident, the five Salinger siblings are forced to live on their own, with oldest son Charlie appointed the guardian.
Post Reply

05x03 - Naming Names

Post by bunniefuu »

Coming...

Hi.

Oh. Uh...

I didn't--

I should have
called you.

N-no. It's all right.

I had another appointment
in the neighborhood.

Um, listen, I have your
complaint right here,

And I'd like to file it
with the court as
soon as possible,

and then we need to
get started on that
proof of paternity, so--

Yeah. Listen, um...
Good news.

Daphne came back.
She came home.

-Really?
-Yeah.

Yesterday. And, um...

We're doin' it right.

You know, Lamaze class,
checkups, the works,
so, um...

Right. I'll, um...

I'll just hang onto it
for a while.

Uh, one more thing.

Tell me that's
not your bill.

No, no.

We do a routine
investigation of
the other party

in conjunction with
any custody case.

This belongs to you.

Right.

There's...

There's some
pretty interesting
stuff in there.

Good luck, Charlie. Who was that?

No one.

It was nothing.
Not important.

[theme song playing]

♪ Everybody wants to live ♪

♪ Like they wanna live ♪

♪ And everybody wants to love ♪

♪ Like they wanna love ♪

♪ And everybody wants to be ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

[indistinct chatter]

So you're a fellow
junkie, huh?

What?

Ha.

Oh, yeah.
Definitely.

You caught me.
The grosser, the better.

Hey, you see
the third one?

Twice.

I still can't figure out
who did it.

Yeah. It's kind of
inexplicable,

but who cares?
Not the point.

A sophisticated
point of view.

-Thank you.
-[chuckles]

Where's Maggie?

Are you kidding?

She thinks these
movies are--
I wanna get this right--

An exploitation
of women... A celebration
of v*olence,

and the ultimate proof
that at our lowest
common denominator,

nothing gets
our juices flowing
like pain and cruelty.

Well, if she's gonna be
that way about it...

Hey.

You mind? I gotta
set this stuff down.

Oh. Sorry.

This a date?

Mm-hmm.

Cool. I'll get out
of your way.

Uh, she scares
kind of easy.

You might want
to hold on tight.

Jerk.

I wanna k*ll him,
the way he treated you.

What?

Oh, yeah.
Definitely.

Okay, so that's
everything, isn't it?

Well, we kinda covered
algebra, biology--

Mr. Alston-jones
was sick,

so no
English lit.

And French, by mutual agreement,
is every girl for herself.

Homework's done.

Homework's done.

All right.

This is too easy,
this study group thing.

Salinger,
you're a whiz.

Well, what can I say?

Except, what are we
going to do tonight?

Thursday night...

Well, some club
in town's got to have
some music

or something,
don't they?

Oh, right. A lot of hot
bands really start cookin'

before our
nine o'clock curfew.

We could sneak.

No. No, we couldn't.

Really? You think
six teenage girls

marching through
the main gate,

you think someone
would notice?

Unless you snuck
between bunker hall

and the Keyser
athletic building,

which sort of lets you out
at the bus stop on Dilby street.

So if you went
through the window
in the bathroom,

you'd only have a
one-story drop to the
roof of the common room,

and then you could
cross behind the quad,

which has, like,
no lights to speak of.

Or not.

Don't I have
a say in this?

Sweetheart, it's part
of the settlement.

We don't have a choice.

Neither your father or I

can afford to buy
each other out,

and the truth is,

neither one of us needs
a place this big anyway.

Honey, we have to
be practical.

Right. Practical.

All you need to tell us

is what you want us to
do with your stuff.

Do you want your father and I
to divide it between us,

or if you like,

I can move it all
exactly as it is here

to wherever I go.

That's not the same.

It's just
glorified storage.

Sarah, honey...

What do you
want me to do?

[sighs] Well...

I was kind of going for
a sleek, contemporary
vibe in here,

But if you were thinking
more along the lines of
romper room...

Oh... I couldn't just
stick it in the guest room

in my mom's new apartment
or my dad's new place

and then pretend
I grew up there.

It's like, wherever
they end up, it's not
gonna be my home, right?

Hey...

Hey, it's okay.

There's plenty of room
for everything here.

You know what?

I really see this working
in the bathroom.

It's never
going to be
like it was, is it?

No.

It's like dominoes. Parents split,

apartment gets sold,
family disappears.

Click, click, click.

I just keep thinking
about my mom.

Yeah.

It's gonna be
a big change for her.

How old was she when
she married your dad?

No. My mom.
My real mom.
My birth mother.

Robin?

Yeah.

Yeah. You know, when I
met her a couple years ago,

she was
just this person,

this really cool person
who was kind of living
her own life

and walking around
with the same DNA as me.

But I didn't need her
to be more than that,

'cause, you know,
I had a family.

But now...

Come on, now. Everyone's
got to share here.

Derek.

The thing
I didn't expect, huh?

Okay. Honestly,
I didn't expect

to find Cheryl so sexy
in her third trimester.

Well, it's true.

We are kinda having sex
all the time.

I didn't expect that.

I see Jill and Henry
nodding back there.

Anyone else?

[sobbing]

I didn't expect to
love the baby so much.

I mean, he's
not even here yet,

but I can't even
explain it in words.

I just love him
so much.

It's overwhelming,
isn't it?

Ladies, don't let
anyone tell you that's
just hormones talking.

There's a very real
bond developing between
you and your child.

He feels your laughter,
he knows your
movements...

Okay, who does that leave?

Let's-- Daphne, Charlie,
what would you say

has been
the biggest surprise?

[both] Uh...

Well, I--
let's see. Um...

I guess
I'd have to say...

the gas.

Yeah. Yeah,
I'd have to go
with the gas.

Tell you what--
next time I pick the movie,
you pick the restaurant.

What, you didn't
like the movie?

No. I loved it.

I can't remember
the last time I had so much fun

watching teenagers
get bludgeoned.

You just shouldn't order
pasta with red sauce

after seeing
all those blood
and guts, you wimp.

Hey, at least
one of us had
a human reaction.

I mean, you
didn't even flinch.

Well, come on,
it's just ketchup
and sugar syrup.

None of that's real.

Wait. So that scene with
the hacksaw,

the girl wearing
her intestines
as a muffler?

Hate to break it
to you, pal.

Not even the kiss
in the cemetery.

Now, that was real.

You can't fake
a kiss like that.

I mean, not with
the camera that close.

I mean, I saw tongues.
I saw tonsils.

You just
think you did.

It was probably
just a lot of...

Like that.

Can I see that
again, please?

Right. And you
think it's real,
because you kind of--

You kind of what?

You know...
Project yourself

into the moment.

Is that what
I was doing?

Mm-hmm.

You're just
gonna shatter

every single
illusion for me,
aren't you?

It's okay. I mean,

I'm gonna have to
grow up sooner
or later.

You know what?
It's a long drive
back to campus,

and I have
an early class.

Right.

[giggling]

Shh! Shh!

He wasn't even
that cute.

What can I say.
Bass players...

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Shh.

Hey, you guys,
does tomato juice stain?

Hello? Who orders
a bloody Mary?

It's so, like, brunch.

Wait.

Did you hear something?

Oh, my God--

Oh, Ms. Shachter.

What's going on
here, girls?

-Uh...
-We, uh...

Hallie's in
bad, bad shape.

Yeah. I'm in
really bad shape.

I-I've got, um...

She's got a...

A nosebleed.

Oh, I think
it's starting again.

It's really bad.

I almost fainted.

She almost fainted.

We were just about to take her
to the infirmary.

Wearing all that
eye makeup?

We heard David Calvert
came down with mono.

Oh... Just go.

[laughing]

So how are childbirth
classes going?

Fine.
They're going fine.

And you folks are
beginning to give
some thought

to a birthing plan,
right?

All I know is that
I want dr*gs.

I want lots and
lots of dr*gs.

Unless--
that's okay, right?

I mean, can they have
any adverse effects
on the baby?

Oh, you don't want me
to have an epidural? Fine.
Then you have the baby.

Uh-huh...

The moment of truth.

Want to know what
color to paint
the nursery?

You mean...

I've got a clear
sh*t up the middle.

Would you like to know
what you're having?

-Yes.
-No.

-Yes.
-No.

You don't
want to know?

No!

I mean,
it's not like
we're not gonna

find out
eventually anyway.

I just don't want
to know right now.

What do you do
if one of us
wants to know

and the other one
doesn't?

Daphne, would you
like to get dressed

while Charlie and I
step outside
for a second?

Whatever.

I don't
want to know, okay?

I mean it.

Nothing.

Nothing. He said he moved
into the apartment
two months ago,

and he knows nothing
of a previous tenant.

What about
the landlord?

Some new
management company.
They don't know her.

There was no
forwarding address,

no recorded message
on her old number.

I don't know
where else to look.

It seems
kind of weird.

I mean,
I don't mean to--

Weren't you guys close?

Sort of.

Not really,
but I mean,
meeting her

for the first time
was a big deal.

It was like, hey,

this is the woman that
I've been dreaming of
all these years, you know, and she's cool.
She's an actress.

Pretty much
looks like me...

I mean, we wrote a lot,
but it's not like we
shared all that much,

so after a while,
it was just sort of,

"Hey, guess what
I did this month?
I started college."

Or you know,
"Guess what I did?

I'm gonna be
in a new play."

I got busy,
she was on tour...

I know it's stupid.

I pretty much take
everything for granted,
don't I?

Sarah...

No. Just say it.
I deserve it. Say it.

Why don't you
contact her
theater company?

Maybe they know
where she is.

You know, you didn't
have to do this.

No... I know.
I know.

It's just,
they're forwarding
all my mail to school,

and some of it's yours,
so I thought

if I forward it again,
you know, it might never
get here.

Anyways, what's with
all the boxes?

You moving out
or something?

Oh, I was gonna-

I'm not really
getting that many
hours at the shop,

and the rent's
kind of tough...

Anyway, Charlie
said that--

This is only if
you're okay with this.

But he said
that it'd be okay

if I sort of crashed
in the shed for
a little while

until things
ease up.

Sure.

Sure. Why not?

Hey, that way
I can see him,
I can see you,

and take one trip,
right? Right.

Well,
so how's school? How's that great
writing professor?

It's really good.

He thinks
I'm talented.

Well, duh.

So you seeing
anyone?

Oh...

I don't know.
It's hard.

I guess I have really
high standards.

Not that there's
any rush or anything.

I mean, if it
doesn't feel right,
what's the point?

Right? It's not like
I have to have

a boyfriend
at all times.

Don't you find it
really hard?

Uh...

I'm, uh, I'm seeing
somebody, actually.

Oh.

Just somebody
at the shop
set us up, so...

Oh... Uh-huh.

Well, that's...

Wow. That's nice, eh?

You having fun?
You like her?

She's okay.

I'm just getting
used to it.

Right.

You should try it. 'Cause it gets easier.

Paul, take the spot
up to the balcony

then mount the cloud go-bos
and the big likos...

His assistant said
that he'd be breaking
in a few minutes.

Quit thinking about
your golf game and lower that third...

Did you see the picture
of her in the lobby,

the one from
Fool for Love

back when she had
long hair?

You could definitely
see a resemblance.

Who was it who wanted
a word with me?

Oh, um... Hi.

Um, my name's
Sarah Reeves.

How do you do?

I was just wondering
if I could have
a moment of your time.

I'm looking for a woman
by the name of
Robin Merrin...

Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, my God.

I know.

Oh, my god.
Really? For sure?

Well, it's
95% for sure, so...

Aah!

Oh, that's so--
just, oh...

That is so...
I mean,

Charlie,
you're gonna have--

Shh.

Shh?

Daphne.

Daphne...

She doesn't know.

What? How could
she not know?

I mean,
wasn't she there?

She didn't
want to know.

Oh.

Oh! So she wants
to be surprised.

You know what?

My sister
was exactly the same way.

She wanted to wait
for that drum-roll moment

in the delivery room, which drove
my mom crazy,
of course.

Kirsten, it's not
like that for Daphne.

Trust me, if Daphne
knows what she's having,

it's harder to act like
it's just a basketball
she's been carrying around.

'Cause... I mean,
when you know,

it's weird.

You connect
in a whole new way.

I mean, suddenly the baby
isn't this abstract thing.

It's a little person...

with a-- a sex
and a face and a...

A life.

It's little league games
and easy-bake ovens and...

It's real...

and it's happening...

and it's happening
to her.

As long as she can
pretend like it isn't,

it's fine with her.

She was doing a play

that a friend of hers
wrote for a summer
festival or something.

I think the guy said
it was in Wyoming.

She took a little plane...

and there was a storm...

Anyway, um, I guess
she didn't have a will,
you know,

or they would have
called me...

unless I wasn't
in the will.

Hey.

Look... At least
you got to meet her.

Right?

I mean, if you had waited
just a few years longer,

then you wouldn't--

At least you got
the chance.

Yeah. I know that.

I know that.
I don't--

I don't even know
why I'm crying,
you know?

It's not like I even
knew her that well.

But she was my mother.

That's so weird.
She was my mother.

And I feel really sad
for her that she d*ed.

And I feel sad for me
because I feel alone,

and I am so angry
at myself for never knowing
what I have.

Yeah. Well...

Nobody ever does.

It's like she had me,
and she let me go.

And then I had her,
and I let her go.

Trouble.
You gotta move back.

I am now very late
for school.

Nuh-uh. You cheated.

No, I did not.

Kirsten, sorry about this.

I'm really-- I'm not
feeling very well.

It's not a problem.

Move it back.

If he had school,
we'd be fine,

but they have these
teacher conferences.

Don't worry
about it.

Maybe you ate
something.

I don't think so.

I'm having lots of
little contractions.

Braxton-hicks
or something.

Well, maybe you should
see the doctor.

Don't move that one.
Move that one.

I don't need
to see the doctor.
I'm pregnant.

I'm not supposed
to feel well.

I don't want to
move that one.

[both] Do whatever
you want.

I just need to relax.

Okay...

I'll be home by 3:30.

It's amazing what
moms go through, huh?

Heh. No kidding.

Well, I guess
the good news is,

one day she'll take
care of both of you.

What?

She'll take care of--

Trouble!

Kirsten, look.
Trouble.

Oh...

Oh, God...

The guy at the theater
gave me their address.

I'm gonna go see 'em.

Uh-huh.

Why?

Why are you
gonna do that?

What an idiotic
question.

They're my grandparents,
you know?

They know something
about my mom and
what happened to her.

They may even
know something
about my father.

Sarah...

Your mom wouldn't
even tell you
about your father.

What makes you think
she'd tell them?

I think you should
just leave it alone.

Are you kidding me?

No. No, I'm not.

Why do you want
to make me feel
stupid for wanting this?

Sarah, you
don't want to just
meet these people.

You want them...
to love you.

You want them
to open their arms
to you and-- and...

I don't know,
tell you that you
belong or something,

but they never
looked for you,

and they're not
looking for you now,

even after
their daughter d*ed.

Right?

I would never
do this to you.

Never.

When you were dealing
with your grandfather,

God, Bailey,
I was always...

You know what?
Maybe it's because
you have nobody,

and I have
the possibility
of somebody.

-Sarah--
-No. That's fine.

It's fine.

From now on, I will do it
without you.

You've made yourself
really clear.

Hey. One sec.

Oh, Elinor just found out
that Edward is going to
marry Lucy.

Sense and Sensibility.

Oh. I thought we were
just going to watch

the Emma Thompson movie
before the test.

Yeah, but it turns out
the book is-- is pretty good.

Yeah, yeah.
Well, guess what?

Hallie heard there's
this Leo look-alike contest

at the galleria
in town.

Is that like
the tackiest thing

you've ever heard of
or what?

Totally.

So we thought we'd
go laugh our asses off,

get something to eat,
maybe catch a flick.

I don't know.
I don't think so.

Why not? I mean,
yeah, it's goofy,

but it'll be
a blast.

I just kinda
want to find out
what happens next.

Look, Hallie already
rented the movie.

You can just
fast-forward
through it.

That's the thing,
Parker...

I don't want to
fast-forward through it.

Fine.

Whatever.

Robin?

No.
Robin isn't here.

No. I know.

If you're from one of
those organizations
she was part of--

Mr. Merrin,

I know
that Robin d*ed.

That's why I'm here.

I'm her daughter.

No, no, no.

She gave her baby up.
She walked away.

Yeah, well,

we kind of found each other, she
and I, about two years ago.

I don't believe you.

Mr. Merrin,

how else would I know
that she had a child?

No, no, no, no.
This is, uh,
this is, uh...

I don't want
any part of this.

I didn't approve
of any of it,

and I, uh...
I want you to leave.

No. Can you just
give me a chance?

Please?

Didn't she tell you about
me? Think about it.

My name's Sarah.
Sarah Reeves.

No. I don't know
anything about you.

Really?

She didn't ever
talk to you about
finding her daughter?

We didn't talk, period.

Okay, then you know what?
Maybe your wife.

No. She's been dead
for three years.

Please,
leave me alone.

Mr. Merrin, I am
your grandchild.

I don't know you.

Who are you?

I don't know if your
story is true or not, but--

I'm 73 years old.

I-- I don't want
any of this.

Could you just
at least talk
to me about her,

you know,
what happened to her,

what it was like
when she had me?

I don't even know
who my father is.

Yeah, well...

I can't. No.

That's it?

That's it? Come on.
You can't just...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

It's just, you are
the only person...

Could you...

I don't have anything
of my mom's.

Can you just
give me something
of hers to keep?

It could be
something very small.

I kinda like it,
actually.

I got 'em making
curio shelves
this week.

Although, God knows

what a bunch of tenth
graders need with curio shelves.

A place to store
their pot.

Heh-heh...
Exactly.

I plan on shaking up
the lesson plan.

Next week,
we're gonna build
a condominium.

Kinda deja vu, huh?

You packing up
your things to
make room in here.

Well, deja vu
minus Julia,
I guess.

Yeah. Listen, um...
About that--
Julia--

You know, she said
she was okay with this.

I know. I was
just thinking

it might be
a little weird if
she ran into you

when you had,
you know, company over.

Uh... It's not gonna
happen, Charlie.

Well, it could,
and I just wanna
make everything

as easy as possible
on Julia,

so maybe if you and I
had an understanding
up front...

I'm not gonna have
girls over here,
okay, Charlie?

Okay. That's all
I'm asking.

I can't even think
of any other girls
right now, you know?

It's, like, even
buying a cup of
coffee for a girl

is, like... so far
down the line.

Uh, look,
all I'm saying is

there's no danger
of that happening,
all right?

None at all.


They're beautiful.

Really.

I don't remember the last time
someone bought me flowers.

In fact, I don't think
anyone ever has,

which is weird, huh?

I mean, 18, no limp,
no disfiguring scars,
no hump.

You'd think once,
at least, someone would
stop at a flower stand.

It's not like they
don't have one on
every freaking corner.

I don't have
a vase, okay?

Hey.

Hey.

Mmm...

Okay...

What is my problem?

I'm sorry, Josh.
I'm sorry.

It's just, uh--

Me. It's
obviously me.

It's something
I'm doing, or--
or not doing,

or it's my overbite,
or my deodorant.

Whatever it is,
it's okay.

I mean, sometimes,
these things are
just chemical.

Josh, it is so not you.

It's not?

It's him.

Him. Him?

He met someone else.

Well, it--

I mean, we've been
together all this time,

and he just moved on.

It's like, in light
of everything, in light
of our history,

I should've been allowed
to move on first.

Doesn't that make sense,
as, like, a professional
courtesy?

Yeah, but...
Why are you upset
about this now?

I mean, you've known
for a while.

What are you
talking about?

Julia, I told you,
he's sleeping with
your roommate.

Oh.

Oh.

Listen, he isn't sleeping
with my roommate.

I mean, he is--
Ned is--
but he isn't Ned.

I mean, Ned isn't him.
I made all that up.

God, I'm a mess.

Josh, I'm a total mess,
and I'm a liar,
and if you knew,

you wouldn't want
to kiss me.

You wouldn't want
to be involved with me.
Trust me on this.

You're not a man,
are you?

What?

It's just I'm sensing
a revelation coming down
the pike here,

and I kinda wanna
cut to the chase.

I am not a man.

Sit down. It's worse.

Look, I don't know
what you want me to say.

I didn't want you
to say anything.
That was the point.

If I wanted to know,
I would've found out
in the doctor's office.

I certainly didn't need
your ex-girlfriend
blabbing it.

Kirsten feels awful.
She feels terrible.

You-- you gotta
rinse those.

You just had to
go and tell her,
didn't you?

Yeah, I did.
I had to tell someone.

I'm having a little girl,
and I wanted to tell someone

who was gonna respond
like it was good news.

Look, I know you
didn't want to know,

but now you do,
so let's deal with it.

Let's talk about it.
Let's talk about her.

I was thinking...
Maybe we could
name her Diana.

As in princess?

As in my mother.

Oh... Wow.

Well, that's gonna
kinda be a problem
for me, Charlie,

because my next door
neighbor growing up,

her name was Diana--
Diana De Dario--

And we'd call her
"the Italian sub."

And every time I hear
the name Diana,

I think of this
extremely fat girl
who shaved my dog

because I wouldn't
give her my Twinkie.

Well, gee, Daphne,
maybe you could
get over that.

Well, gee, Charlie,
maybe you could pick
another name.

Because of some
next door neighbor
you had 20 years ago?

You don't think that's
a little ridiculous?

What? I don't want
my kid named after
some bully.

Daphne, it's
my mother's name.

My mother...
Who I loved, who d*ed,

and who this child
is never gonna get
to see or know.

I want her to have
something of her
grandmother's,

and you can't
just veto this on
the grounds that--

What, I don't
get a vote?

Only if it really
matters to you.

Because you know what?
It really matters
to me, a lot.

Now, I think
the person who cares
the most should win.

It's-- Fine.
It's your call.

That's... Wow.

I know. So-- so, let's see,
what does that--

That means, uh...
Barbie dolls...
and my little pony,

and ballet lessons
and "Why can't I get
my ears pierced

when everyone else
in nursery school has
their ears pierced?"

Whole ball of wax.

You are in serious
trouble, man.

Why? How do
you figure?

Well, there's
gonna come a day

when she walks
through the door

four hours after her
curfew, and she's
got a hickey

on her neck the
size of a baseball,

and she declares
her undying love

for a guy who's
got a tattoo
on his bicep

that reads
"born dead."

A guy named "Meat,"

and that's not even
his nickname.

Man, I should just
start saving for
your bail right now.

Probably.

They say little girls
really love their fathers.

Or do you think
that's just something
people say?

No. That sounds
right to me.

I'm gonna name
her Diana.

After mom.

Wow.

That's...

That's just...
I'm sorry.

No, that's okay.

I've been kinda welling up
about it, too.

There'll be another
Diana Salinger
in the world.

Yeah.

Hey. I'm sorry
I'm late.

Charlie showed up
at the restaurant,

and there was
horrible traffic.

You were right.

Okay? You were right.

I'm sorry?

You were right,
and I was wrong.
Just say it.

Say it and
get it over with

because you obviously
understand human nature,
and I do not.

You went to see
your grandparents.

I went to see
a 70-something-
year-old man

who's pretty much
out of it since
his daughter d*ed,

and didn't take too well
to a strange teenager

showing up and announcing
that she's his long-lost
family.

He... He didn't tell
you anything?

Nothing.

I got nothing from him.

Nothing about her,
nothing about my father,

not a picture or a scarf
or even a pair of shoes
to remember her by.

I'm sorry.

I don't have anything
of hers to hold onto.

She left me
without anything.

That's not true.

Hey, what's up?

Algebra.

Yeah,
algebra hell.

Sounds ugly.

You guys planning on
working straight through?

I mean, do you have
any plans for tonight?

Yeah, but we
wouldn't want

to burden you
or anything.

Right.

Listen, I kind of
wanna talk to you
about what happened.

Forget it.

You're smart.

You want the grades.
No biggie. Give me a break.

It's just that
sneaking out at night

is not, like,
some big thrill for me.

Uh-huh.

Look, all I'm saying
is, for you guys,
it's, like,

"Oh, my God.
I'm away from my
parents. I'm free.

I'm free to just
go wherever I want,
do whatever I want,

and break all the rules
that I can break."
I mean, right?

Well, I didn't have
any rules, okay?

And for the last four years,
I could stay out as late
as I wanted,

and no one asked me
where I was going,

and no one asked me
where I was when
I came back.

I don't really have anything
to rebel against.

I didn't come here
to escape from anyone or cut the strings
with my parents.

Right.

I-- I can
see that.

I'm just saying
I came here 'cause
this is a good school,

and I don't have to study
if there's something else
great to do...

But just to sneak out...

It's kinda like...
Been there. Done that.

Thought you might be
a little thirsty.

No. Maybe later.
Thanks.

We have, uh...
Lamaze class
tonight at 6:00--

I know that.

No. I was
just saying--

I mean, I was
just thinking
that maybe after,

we could, uh,
go out to dinner.

There's this new
Greek place on Geary
I heard about.

It's supposed
to be pretty good.

One of those
plate-smashing
restaurants?

Sounds perfect for us.

Daphne...

I'm sorry. Look,
you're obviously
trying to be nice.

Hey, I am nice.

Well, I am nice, too.

I am not a bad person,
Charlie.

I know you think I am-

No, I don't.
I don't.

I think that you're
having a hard time
with all this stuff,

and you know what?
Same here. Me, too.

But, Daphne,
this baby's coming...

No matter what is
going on between
the two of us,

she's on her way.

I know that.

And the way
I see it,
you and me,

we have nine weeks
to get our act
together,

to find a way to
be okay together, and...

I'm not sure exactly
how to do that or how
to get there, but...

Maybe it starts with
a little souvlaki.

Oh, I hate souvlaki.

Do you think
maybe they have those
grape-leaf thingies?

And... sign there.

About how long should it
take to become official?

Couple of weeks...
And a check.

Right.

So, uh... all-new
stationary, huh?

Yeah, I suppose so.

Let me get you a receipt.

Hey... I don't believe
we've met.

I'm Bailey Salinger.

Sarah Reeves...
Merrin.

It's nice to meet you.

Hey.

Hey.

Chocolate
chocolate chip.

It kinda melted.
I had to stuff it
under my shirt

going over
the east wall.

There's hot fudge
sauce, too,

but it may have,
like, congealed.

Thanks.

I think.

Hey, you tell her about
that cute B.U. guy
we met on the "T"?

I didn't wanna,
like, interrupt your
reading or anything.

It's okay. I'm just,
like, drooling over
chapter 18.

You're kidding.
It gets kinda sexy?

No. I meant,
literally... drooling.

-Oh, that's gross.
-Eww.

So, you guys met
a college guy?

Yeah, but our
first mistake

was saying we were
college students.

Lisa's all, "we're,
like, freshmen
at Harvard."

Yeah, and he
was, like,

"No kidding.
So's my sister.

Where do
you guys live
in the yard?"

-Uh-oh.
-Yeah!

[Ned] It's completely
understandable.

[Julia] No, it isn't.
I'm a nut case.

So you overreacted
a little.

A little?

You wouldn't
say that if you'd been there.

God, poor Josh.

Poor, miserable,
in-way-over-his-head, and
doesn't-know-what-hit-him Josh.

Julia...

Don't try and
make me feel better.

Just go back to whatever
you were doing in your
research or... whatever.

Political structure
of the early
Ottoman empire.

Mm. I'm so sorry
you had to run into
the lunatic girl

who's hiding down
in the stacks because
she utterly incapable

of ordinary
human interaction.

You know what
your problem is?

Yes. I'm a lunatic girl
who's utterly incapable

of ordinary
human interaction.

You've got that
first-hump problem.

Hump? I have
a hump now?

Obstacle.

You've got this
really old failed
relationship,

like, since
high school,

and it's over,
and you know
it's over,

but still, you're
kind of afraid
of anything

that acknowledges
the overness of it.

"The overness of it."

I'm lost.

It's the
first big step

that's screwing
you up here.

Like,
the first kiss.

Mm-hmm.

You just gotta
do it.

You gotta kiss
someone other than
that Griffin.

All right. So,
I kiss Josh, and
everything's fine?

No. I don't think so.
I think I'd feel worse.

No, no. 'Cause
it's, like...

"Wow.
Lightning didn't
strike me dead.

The world
isn't over.

I haven't done
a terrible thing,

and there's life
after Griffin,

and there's
someone else out
there for me."

I don't think so.

You gotta try.

I can't.

Sure, you can.

Oh, my God.

Now it all
gets easier.

Vary the pattern, Bob.

First four fingers,
then one finger,
then three fingers.

Keep her guessing.
Keep her focused
right on you.

Okay? Good work.
Good.

Remember,
short breaths of air.

Hee! Hee! Hee!
Hooo...

Hee! Hee! Hee!
Hooo...

Hey, fellas,
let's not forget,

a little encouragement
goes a long way.

-Hee! Hooo...
-There you go,
Laurine.

Hee-- huh?

And...
20 more seconds.

Ow.

Not to be a stickler
here, Daph, but it's
"Hee! Hee--"

Ca-an't.

Sure, you can.

No. Ha-ving-a-
con-trac-tion.

Okay, get ready...

What?
You're what?

-Here comes
another one.
-Are you sure?

Get somebody...
Fa-ast...

Over here!

Good job,
but, honey,

when the real
thing happens,

try not to clench
quite so much.

No, you don't...
Won't... Stop...

This is
the real thing.

She's having
contractions.

-Make it stop.
-Look, do something.

Uh, but... this
isn't supposed
to happen--

Do something!

Call an ambulance.

Charlie...

Daphne, look at me,
look at me.

You're gonna be okay.
You're gonna be
all right.

Daphne, look at me,
look at me.
Post Reply