06x24 - The Generation Zap

[bunniefuu]

Darrin?

I'm on the phone.

Larry, I've gotta go.

And the next time you
have such good news,

can it wait till I get to
the office? Goodbye.

Haven't you got
time for breakfast?

No, I'm late
already. I'd better go.

What'd Larry want?

Oh, some college kid who's
thinking about a career in advertising

is coming to the
office to observe.

As if I don't have
enough of a workload,

guess who Larry's
assigned the kid to.

Why did he have to call
you at home to tell you that?

He figures if I'm gonna get
mad, do it on my own time.

I think it's very
decent of Larry to show

an interest in a
young college person.

Yeah.

Especially one whose father
happens to be an important client.

A-ha!

I'd better get going.

Take good care
of that college girl.

Did I say it was a girl?

No, but you didn't
say it was a he,

so I figured it must be a she.

Oh.

Bye.

Samantha, blind faith
is unbecoming to you.

Mother, eavesdropping
is unbecoming to you.

Don't you care that Dum-Dum
is the prey of some college cutie?

Goodbye, Mother.

Goodbye, sucker.

Now, Mother.

No mortal pulls the wool over
a witch's eyes while I'm around.

Mother, I want you
to promise to butt out.

Very well, very well. I promise.

Witch's honor.

Really, Samantha.
I hardly think...

Mother!

Witch's honor.

Thank you.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna give Adam his bath.

Serena!

Hi, Auntie!

What's going down?

Little cousin got a problem?

Not yet, but I'm working on it.

How are you at love spells?

To be perfectly frank, terrific!

In that case, Serena, how would you
like to have some fun with Dum-Dum?

Oh, Endora, why me?

Because I promised
not to butt in.

You know I hate to be pushy.

So you butt in.

Endora, you're positively evil.

I know. Isn't it divine?

Mr. Stephens, Miss
Harrison is here.

Show her in.

Thank you. How do you
do? I'm Dusty Harrison.

Well, I'm Darrin
Stephens. Nice to meet you.

Please sit down.

Thank you.

Yes, I certainly do
appreciate you taking the time

to orient me to the
world of advertising.

It's my pleasure.

I don't know just how
we're gonna proceed, but...

Well, I think the most practical
method would be for you

to do whatever it is you do
and pay no attention to me.

Yes, well,

I have a storyboard
to check over.

You might like to look at that.

Yes, yes, I think I might.

I'm rather proud of this one.

It's for a TV commercial.

The product is Hilgreen coffee,

and the hero is a
cranky coffeepot.

But this morning, the lady of the
house puts a new coffee in the pot.

Now he begins to smile,
and now he's chuckling,

and then we see
it's Hilgreen coffee.

Well, what do you think of it?

Well...

And now, no sidestepping,
now. I want your honest opinion.

Okay, it's childish.

No, no, be honest.

What do you mean, childish?

It implies that you can get
happiness in a can of coffee

when it doesn't say anything
about the quality of the coffee.

Have you ever
tasted this coffee?

That is not our problem.

Well, maybe that's what's wrong
with the world of advertising.

Miss Harrison, I
hardly think that...

Go ahead. Put the spell on her.

I still don't see why I
have to do your dirty work.

Because when I make a promise
not to interfere, I never interfere.

But that doesn't mean
you can't interfere.

So start interfering.

Let this chick by love be dazed

when on this mortal
she doth gaze.

You're in a
position to criticize.

And, furthermore...

What is it?

Mmm?

Is something wrong?

Oh, no. Far from it.

What are you smiling about?

I don't know.

I guess your
enthusiasm is contagious.

Anything wrong with
being contagious?

Enthusiastic?

Of course not. I
think it's beautiful.

Isn't it funny? When
I first came in here

I thought, "Wow, this
is gonna be a drag."

You did?

But you have such
a wonderful manner.

I do?

I know this is going to be a
marvelous experience, Darrin.

Yes, it is, Dusty.

Let's go.

No!

I wanna stick around
and see how it comes out.

If you don't know that,
you're not much of a witch.

Oh.

Well, I'd better get
on with my work.

Is there anything I can do?

Not really.

Well, I'd love to help.

Well, as a matter of fact,
those pencils need sharpening.

There's a sharpener
on the drafting table.

Yes, sir, Darrin.

I've got another idea.

How would you like to
go on an errand for me?

Oh, I'd love to.

Especially if you come with me.

I think you can
handle this by yourself.

Nice. Nice and sharp.

You were right. This
coffeepot is all wrong.

It doesn't have any character.

It doesn't?

I want you to go shopping

and see if you can find a
coffeepot that knows its own mind.

An aggressive,
clear-thinking coffeepot.

Right. I'll do it as fast as
I can and be right back.

No, no, no. Take your time.

Buy a half a dozen
if you have to.

Comb the city, but take
all the time you need.

I really appreciate
your confidence.

And I won't fail you, Darrin.

Sam?

In here, sweetheart.

Hi. Hi, honey.

How was your day?

Well, it wasn't a bad day.

It wasn't a good day.

As a matter of fact,
it wasn't a bad day.

That bad, huh? What happened?

The client's daughter happened.

Oh? What's she like?

She's just your average
know-it-all college girl.

A little on the plain side.
Studious, dedicated, you know.

Yes.

I'll get it.

Hi. Hi.

You must be Mrs.
Stephens. I'm Dusty.

You don't look it.

Yes, I'm Mrs.
Stephens. Come on in.

I'll get Mr. Stephens.
Thank you.

It's your average
know-it-all college kid.

A little on the plain side.

Dedicated, studious, wearing a
miniskirt and a great big smile.

Hi.

Well, hi.

You've changed.

I usually do when I'm going out.

Your coffeepots.

I brought them by the
office, but you had gone.

And you said it was crucial, so I thought
you should have them as soon as possible.

Well, thanks. You
shouldn't have bothered.

I was glad to do it, Darrin.

Well, can I fix you something?

Coffee? Ginger ale? Root beer?

When you get to martini, stop.

A martini, huh?
Well, come on in.

Make yourself comfortable.

Thank you.

Sam, suppose you could
fix some cheese and crackers

or a snack or
something like that?

How about giving me a
quarter? I'll go to the movies.

You must think it's terrible
of me barging in this way.

Oh.

But it's really been an
inspiration working with Darrin.

You don't mind if I
call him Darrin, do you?

Of course not. He's been
called worse than that.

That's great. A wife
with a sense of humor.

Yes, we laugh a lot around here.

Here you are. Thanks.

You know what I think
is amazing, Darrin?

That you've gotten as far
as you have at your age.

Actually, I'm not that young.

Although I guess most men
in my position are much older.

Nuts?

No, thanks.

I hope one of those
coffeepots will do the trick.

I'm just dying to have
you look at my coffeepots.

I'm sure he's dying to see them.

That's very sweet of you.

Oh, that must be my roast.

I'd better be going now.

Well, I'll see you tomorrow.

Yes, until tomorrow.

It's been wonderful meeting you.

It's been nice meeting you, too.

I just hope I found a clear-thinking,
aggressive coffeepot for you.

Sweetheart, don't you
think it would have been nice

if you'd asked Dusty
to stay for dinner?

I'll admit, she looked hungry.

Come on, Sam. She's
just a very naive kid.

But she certainly
does have enthusiasm.

And it's very well-distributed.

Darrin, how come you
didn't mention the fact

that she obviously has
a violent crush on you?

You really think so?

Yes, I really think so.

Maybe I could talk Larry into
assigning Dusty to someone else.

Don't be ridiculous.

You're right.

Do you think that
silly little girl could

make me forget
you for one moment?

Well, for one moment, maybe.

I'll talk to Larry
in the morning.

Good idea.

Actually, I felt this
would be better coming

from Mr. Tate, but,
well, he didn't agree.

Miss Harrison...

You promised to call me Dusty.

Okay,

Dusty.

Well, here it is in a nutshell.

You're so decisive. You
come right to the point.

Yes?

Well, it's simply this.

I feel it would be better if you were
assigned to one of the other men.

You mean you don't
want me around?

No, no, it's not that. It's just
that I think it would be safer.

I mean, wiser.

Oh, please, no, don't do that.

Now, now, now, look.

This isn't very
mature, you know.

Please try to understand, Dusty.

I'm only doing this
for your own good.

After all, you came here to
learn something, didn't you?

And then Dusty ran
hysterically home

and cried her heart
out to her father,

who obviously
thinks I've led her on.

Now I'm public enemy number
one with Larry and Harrison.

If I didn't know better, I'd
say there was a spell on Dusty.

Gee, thanks a lot.

What do you mean, if
you didn't know better?

Mother gave her witch's
honor she wouldn't interfere.

Her witch's what?

Her witch's honor. And
she wouldn't dare break it.

Of course, there
is the possibility

she got someone
else to cast that spell.

But who?

Who else?

My cousin, the love goddess.

Some love goddess.

You know what I'd better do?

Call Harrison and
straighten things out with him.

I'll get his number
from the office.

Serena. Serena.

Serena, I wanna talk
to you right this second.

Go pollinate something.

"Am on cloud nine. Can't
come right now. Serena."

Oh.

Serena, you're not gonna
get away with it that easily.

Darrin? Yeah?

Do you mind if I go
out for a little while?

Esmeralda's upstairs with
the kids. I won't be long.

Okay.

You see what's
happened to your cousin

as a result of living
in the mortal world?

She's getting to be
almost as dumb as he is.

Now do your thing.

Very good, Samantha.

Thank you, Mums.

Oh.

Darrin?

Yeah?

I thought you left.

I changed my mind.

You know, it just
occurred to me.

Instead of talking to
Harrison on the phone,

why not invite him to drop over?

You mean here?

Well, sure.

That way he can see how much in
love and how happily married we are.

Samantha, that's
a terrific idea.

And the way he's building up a
head of steam, the sooner the better.

I'll ask him to come
over as soon as possible.

Mr. Harrison, I really
appreciate your coming over.

I know it's an imposition,

but I have my reasons for
wanting to talk to you here.

Let's get on with it.

Well, of course. Please come in.

I want you to meet my wife.

This is my wife,
Samantha. Mr. Harrison.

How do you do? How do you do?

Please sit down.

Okay.

You got something
to say, let's hear it.

I've got quite a few
things to say to you.

Okay.

Mr. Harrison, look around
here. What do you see?

A very nice home
and a very lovely wife.

Thank you.

Exactly.

Which should prove to you that I'm a
happily married man and very much in love.

And I swear to you, I have not given
your daughter one bit of encouragement.

I can't swallow that.

Dusty's always been a
very level-headed girl.

And yet you expect me to believe that
she could fall in love with a married man

that she's known for little over a
day without any encouragement.

I suppose that sounds
fishy to you, but...

It sounds a little
fishy to me, too.

What?

I mean, from
Mr. Harrison's point of view.

Oh.

Samantha, would you
just sit there and listen?

Certainly, sweetheart.

Now then...

Would this bother
you, Mrs. Stephens?

Not in the least.

Excuse me. I'll get it.

May I?

I just love the smell
of a good cigar.

Yes, it's a panatela.
Care for one?

Don't pretend he isn't
here because I know he is.

Daddy, I couldn't believe it when
your office told me where you'd gone.

Why are you trying
to humiliate me?

Dusty, just take
it easy and relax.

When are you going to
stop treating me like a child?

When you start
acting like an adult.

I'm trying to act like an
adult, but you won't let me.

I think I'd better
take you home.

No. I wanna have this out.

Stop it, Dusty.

Yeah, will you stop it?

I don't care. I love him.

He's already married,
you silly little nincompoop.

That's right, I'm
married, you nincompoop.

You called me a nincompoop.

Yeah, but so did your father.

Oh, Dusty. You ought to
let me take you home, honey.

If you don't stay out of this,

I'm never going to
speak to you again.

Please stop that, Dusty.

Will you cut that out?

I tell you, Mrs. Stephens, I
don't even know how to apologize.

That's okay. I'm used to it.

You mean...

Why don't you walk me out
on the patio and I'll fill you in?

But we won't be able
to keep an eye on them.

And they won't be able
to keep an eye on us.

Get it?

Now just calm down, Dusty.

Why are you so mean to me?

Dusty, you've got to get
over me. I am not available.

If your wife cares
so much for you,

then why is she out on
the patio with my father?

Well, I don't know.

I still think we ought to go
inside and see what's happening.

Forget about them.
Let's talk about us.

Well, I still think...

It figures. Mother got
you to do her dirty work.

Cool it, Cuz. We
only did it for you.

Mortal men being what they
are, we thought a simple spell,

a certain test of
infidelity was in order.

I don't have to put
Darrin through any test.

And if you don't remove
that spell, Cousin,

you are going to
be an ex-cousin.

I guess you just don't know what
it's like to be in love with somebody

who doesn't even care for you.

That's not true!

Darrin, are you hurt?
Are you all right?

No, I'm fine.

Okay, okay, but you're making
a national case out of nothing.

That's a federal
case and hurry up.

I'm fine. Now just
calm down. I'm fine.

Spoilsport.

Ought to go in.

You animal! What are you doing?

Take your hands
off her, Stephens!

I have had enough
of this whole silly farce!

And I've had enough
of your pawing.

And I've heard enough of
your explanations, you phony.

Well, just what are
you gonna do about it?

I ought to bust you
right in the bazoo.

You and who else?

Well, had enough? Try one here.

What'd you do to
my father, you brute?

Nothing. I...

I have a good mind
to slap your face.

Well, if it'll make you feel
any better, be my guest.

Come along, Father.

Gladly. This place is crazy.

And don't forget, you
owe me for five coffeepots.

Why did you let her hit me?

After all she'd been through, I felt
it was the least I could do for her.

Well?

It still hurts.

Light to heavy snow covered
most of the Eastern Seaboard today.

And storm warnings are up from
Cape Hatteras to the Gulf Coast.

The low for the day was
recorded at Rocky Point, Montana,

with a temperature of
20 degrees below zero.

You didn't even
touch your lamb chops.

It's a little hard to eat when
the roof's about to fall in.

Maybe Harrison will change his
mind about canceling his account.

Do you really believe that?

No.

But I hate to see those
chops go to waste.

I don't know what I'm going to tell
Larry, if he's still speaking to me.

If he isn't, you don't
have to tell him anything.

Sam, listen.

He is 52-year-old John J.
Harrison, head of Harrison Industries,

who was charged with embezzlement
and three counts of fraud.

Is that the same Harrison?

Of course.

Professors is meeting
with presidential advisors

to discuss matters
relating to the academic...

I knew it all the time. I knew he was
in trouble. I had a feeling in my bones.

That's why I drove him to the
point where he pulled his account.

Boy, are we lucky we're not
associated with him anymore.

Darrin...

If I do say so myself,
my timing was beautiful.

Darrin, do you really
believe any of that?

No.

Then why are you saying it?

I'm just rehearsing what
I'm going to tell Larry.

How does it sound?

Ridiculous.

Well, there's no other
earthly explanation, is there?

No, you're right.

There is no other
earthly explanation.

You sly dog.