06x09 - Buried

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Workin' Moms". Aired: January 2017 to present.*
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"Workin' Moms" revolves around a group of friends dealing with the challenges of being working mothers.
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06x09 - Buried

Post by bunniefuu »

NATHAN: Previously, on "Workin' Moms:"

She wants custody of Nathan Jr..

- You're kidding, right?
- I hope you don't mind

that I picked Nathan Jr.
up from school today.

I convinced the board to reissue

- "The Raccoon and the Rock."
- What?

I wanna get this right, Jenny.

- Your pregnancy is high-risk.
- No, it's not.

Jesus, Lionel,

- what is going on with us?
- (SIGHS)

Wait, are you hiding something?

- What are you doing here?
- Is Annie here?

- No! No thank you!
- (DOOR SLAMS)

- You released some chapters.
- The cat's out of the bag.

Big mistake. Huge.

Now, with pinworm season on the horizon,

I thought it only appropriate
we talk about our fears.

- JOSEPH AND JACOB: Mom? Mom? Oh!
- Oh God.

Joseph, Jacob? What are you...

We know we're supposed
to register and sh*t,

but can Crystal join your little group?

- Who is she?
- Oh, just our girlfriend!

- "Our?"
- Yeah! Full of our seed.

- Mm-hmm.
- What?

Val, I think they're trying to tell you

- that you're gonna be a grandma.
- Oh wait,

- which one of you is the father?
- Oh, we don't know.

- What?!
- Hang on a second.

How does this work, exactly?

Is this like a threesome situation?

He's my brother! Gross!

Maya, don't pull back the veil on this.

So...

she can join?

(INHALES DEEPLY)

Of course, the more the merrier.

- CRYSTAL, JACOB: Exactly! Nice!
- VAL: Unbelievable.

My dudes, please treat Crystal here like

- you would your own mother.
- CRYSTAL: Come on!

- Okay, bye! Mm! Have fun!
- Okay! Thank you.

Thank you, dudes. Peace!

All right! I'm on fire!

So, what are you guys talking about?

Oh, um... uh, Val?

Oh, just my biggest fear.

Which is certainly not
my two monstrous children

making me a grandma before my time

by sharing the vag*na of a woman

who doesn't even care
what semen she's cooking.

(LAUGHS) It's not that.

It's uh...

- It's really not.
- (CHILDREN SHOUT PLAYFULLY)

So what is it?

(HORRIFIED EXHALE)

Why do we come to this thing?

I don't know. I don't know.

♪♪♪

- Let's run.
- Mm-hmm.

CHARLIE: I know!

I told her, too,
but she wouldn't listen.

- What the hell?
- (DOOR CREAKS OPEN)

Hey buddy, who you talkin' to?

Just talkin' to the wall?
That's kinda fun.

But, you know, it's late.

No, I'm talking to her.

Who's uh, who's her?
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

The lady.

Uh huh.

She's watching you.

Okay, I don't like that.

I'm telling you,
he was just standing there.


Like, clearly responding to someone.

- Mm-hmm.
- Pausing to let them speak,

nobody there. Ugh!

Okay, well... (SIGHS)

it's one of two things:

Either Charlie has an imaginary friend

or, and this is a big or,

- Charlie has contacted a spirit.
- What?

Kids see ghosts!

My aunt Mona saw ghosts all
the time when she was a kid,

and she was the life of the party.

- Was?
- Well, no one's seen her

in years.

- (SNAPS FINGERS) Great news!
- It was benign?

- Two for two!
- (RELIEVED SIGH)

I am unkillable! (LAUGHS)

But that's not the news,
Chapter-gate worked.

What do you mean, how do you know?

We've been getting
nothing but press requests

for Rebecca Anderson
since those leaked pages.

Yes, yes, yes! We are winning!

We are k*lling!

We are poppin' off! (CHUCKLES)

Did I not use that correctly
or what? What...

- No, you did.
- I mean, it was like,

- perfect, actually.
- Hmm!

- Check me out.
- (KATE LAUGHS)

Oh, uh, you have that pitch
session with the cereal

- company this afternoon, right?
- Holey Loops.

Let's keep up the momentum, huh?

(CHUCKLES) You still think
you can talk 'em out

of that dreadful slogan?

I think I can convince
them to listen to reason.

(SNAPS HIS FINGERS) Keep on poppin' off!

- (GASPS)
- (LAUGHS)

Nailed it again there, eh?

- (KATE AND ROSIE LAUGH)
- Yes! Okay!

Okay, okay, okay, okay!

Can't stop, I'm afraid.
She's at the wheel.

She's at the wheel...

I should work on the cereal thing,
though.

So was everyone excited to
find out you were pregnant?

Oh, my reveal was... usurped.

No! By who?

Nina Harris.

An emotionally charged
brown-noser at Wynston.

Oh, and she got
"The Raccoon and the Rock" re-issued.

- But I thought you were...
- Yeah, me too.

But I guess the new girl
gets whatever she asks for.

Oh, and by the way,

I am also going to be her mentor,

- at her request.
- That's actually

a huge compliment.

Oh, I'm telling you,
I don't trust this bitch.

I have worked too hard and
too long to be replaced.

So if Wynston thinks that
I am just gonna step aside

for some... What are you lookin' at?!

Whoa! Sorry.

Namaste.

You know, it sounds like you and Nina

- are just very different people.
- Clearly.

But you know what?

Everybody in this park is different.

And you see that thing up there?

It still shines down on all of us.

Because there's always
enough sunshine to go around.

Gross.

It was in my horoscope this morning.

But, you gotta admit,
there's something to that.

(EXHALES, CHUCKLES)

You know,
I don't usually date guys like you.

Adorably prophetic? Charming?

Corny? White?

- Five figure salary?
- Dealer's choice.

Well, I'm gonna go with charming, then.

(LAUGHS)

♪♪♪

- (FOOTSTEP THUD)
- (WORRIED EXHALES)

(GROANS)

(SIGHS) Just answer!

No, no! We're closed, Abby.

We're closed!

(EXHALES HEAVILY)

(PANICKED BREATHING)

Hi, Dr. Vance?

Yeah, it's Jenny Matthews,

your high-risk, cute patient.

Um, so I'm spotting and cramping.

Yeah, but I've spotted before.

That doesn't necessarily mean
I'm gonna miscarry, right?

Well, how do I... how do I make it stop?

Okay. This timing, it's like,

it's like, not great.

And there's something
that I really need to do

before it happens...

Well, sh*t, how long do I have?

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

- There you are!
- There you are, I was actually

- looking for you.
- Why? N-Never mind,

I don't care. Good news,
we're getting married today.

What are you talking about?

I called City Hall and
there was a cancellation,

so we can get married
in like, minutes.

I thought you said we're "too hot"

- for a city hall wedding.
- We are, but...

to be honest, it-it's a lot.

Planning a wedding,

and, and there's just too
much on my plate right now,

so, let's go, exit's this way.

Yeah, I just
gotta check in with Gena first.

- Come on this way.
- Bitch better be ready!

- Surprise!
- (ALL CHEER AND APPLAUD)

(SCREAMS)

(SCREAM FADES, BECOMES HOARSE)

(EMPLOYEES WHISPER)

It's a waby shower!

It's a wedding and baby shower.
You get it?

You're not the only one
full of surprises today.

(SIGHS)

TOMÉ: Thanks for letting me in, Annie.

It's so nice to see you again. (SIGHS)

So, when did you get into town?

- Yesterday!
- How would I possibly know?

(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)

And why are you here, exactly?

Well, the thing that I'm doing now, um,

and think of it like a
really intense workout

on a stairmaster, but with like...

steps. (SMALL LAUGH)

So you're getting clean?

Yes! (LAUGHS)

But only from my sex addiction.

And I'm going around to everyone

that I've ever harmed to make amends.

Oh. Tomé,
you did not need to get on a plane

and come all this way
just to tell me that...

(EXHALES) I kissed your husband,
and it wasn't right!

But, to be fair,
I was in a benzo-vision,

and we... we had heat.

- Is this true?
- Um...

Uh, well, I mean, like...

Uh, the-like, there's a...

Uh, like, in a way,

there's a part of it that like,
could be a lit...

- like, a little bit true.
- Which part?

Technically, the...

- you know, the kiss part.
- The kiss part, Lionel?!

- That's the worst part!
- It was a graze!

- It was a graze!
- What the f*ck

- is wrong with you?
- Oh, honey, let me explain...

- Don't touch me!
- Oh, no, no, Annie, it was my fault.

- Yes, it was her fault!
- Yeah, it will never happen again!

It barely even happened
in the first place!

Shut up!

You have been giving me nothing but sh*t

about that whole getting kicked
out of the courtroom thing,

and this whole time,
behind my back, you kissed this?!

Do you want me to k*ll you?!

- No, not my face!
- LIONEL: Anne!

- (GLASS SHATTERS)
- Oh!

Oh my God, Annie!

Hey, you're bleeding.

- Hey, Anne, you're bleeding.
- I'm fine.

Do not follow me!

Come on, let me take care of you.

- No.
- Um, Annie,

I don't think I can actually leave

until I get that forgiveness.

Tomé, get the f*ck out of my house.

Oh.

(TRAFFIC RUMBLES)

Thanks again for taking me to lunch.

Yeah.

You know, I, I kinda thought

that maybe you didn't like me.

I was a bit worried I
had stepped on your toes

with the whole
"Raccoon and the Rock" thing.

Well...

there's enough sunshine
for everybody, right?

I just really wanted to impress you,

it's not very often
you get to sit across

from someone of your credentials.

Anyone can get the credits
if they work hard enough.

Yeah, but that's not
all there is to it, right?

What about the stuff
they don't teach you,

like, reading people.

Sure, I mean, yeah,

being intuitive is important, mm-hmm.

And your drive, I mean,
it's not every woman

who puts her career
above starting a family.

Well, I hate to break it to you,
but, uh...

Wait, what?

- (LAUGHS)
- You are not pregnant!

You're braver than I thought.

Thank you.

Yeah, I've-I've barely
told anyone, and um...

it feels really good to.

Oh! Are you crying?

No! You're gonna make me cry!

- (BOTH LAUGH)
- You started it.

- (LAUGHS) Not now!
- Go away!

(BOTH LAUGH)

I gotta tell you, we are such big fans

of Holey Loops cereal around here.

We love all the flavors.

The variety is second to none.

Now, I'd love to talk to you
about the slogan.

No, we don't touch the slogan.

Oh, uh...

"A hole for every taste."

Came up with it myself.

- Pretty proud of it, actually.
- Uh huh. I just um,

I don't think it speaks to the product.

- How do you mean?
- Well, do you worry, you know,

that it could be misconstrued?

All the "hole" talk,
a little bit confusing.

Uh, I don't think it's confusing at all.

It's hole-shaped cereal,

that comes in many flavors.
So it satisfies every taste.

It's quite simple, actually.

Even a complete idiot could
understand it. (CHUCKLES)

Uh huh.

Thank you for coming in today.

I know this focus
group was short notice,

but we wanted to get your
thoughts and reactions

on a particular slogan.

What kind of product do you
think this is a slogan for?

It's for flavored dental dams, duh!

Interesting, sure.

Any other guesses?

- Forrest?
- What are dental dams?

They're condoms,

- but for muff-diving.
- What?!

I've been putting myself at
risk for all these years?

I'm so sorry.

I'll show you how they
work if you wanna suit up.

For real?

Okay, so, it's uh,
it's not a dental dam.

How could it be a slogan for
anything but a dental dam?

(ALL ARGUING AT ONCE)

I can't believe you pulled
this off so quickly.

Are you kidding?
These people have nowhere else to be.

They're definitely proving your point.

JUNIPER: Maybe it's just me,
but when it comes

to dental dams,
I actually prefer the rubber flavor.

Like, what kinda rubber, though?
Tire? Rain boot?

Yeah, this is insane,
how are they supposed

to understand this without context?

Fair, totally fair.

So, what if I told you that
"a hole for every taste"

was a cereal slogan?

ALL: Ohhhh!

- JUNIPER: Nice!
- See? They get it.

Because like,
the whole world gets to taste it.

Wrong spelling of "hole,"
but very close.

Ah, we're gettin' close,
we're gettin' close.

- JOSEPH: Yeah.
- Because it's in a hole.

And they're hole-they're...

- I guess they're confused.
- Hmm!

What, is it like, whole milk, maybe?

JUNIPER:
Which hole do you put the cereal in?

- Is it dealer's choice?
- No, no, no, no!


It tastes like different holes!

Nope, wrong again, whew!

Oh my God, guys!

It's hole-shaped cereal
that comes in many flavors!

- Why didn't you just say that?
- I did!

Holes are all kinds of shapes, man.

- So stupid.
- I think I used to work here.

(SIGHS) Okay,

you've made your point.

I'll talk to my partners,
and we'll set up a follow-up.

I think that's really smart, yeah.

PROTESTERS: (CHANTING) We're clean,
you're dirty!


What's that chanting?

Ugh! So many protests in
the neighbourhood, very hip.

(CHUCKLES) So maybe we
could sit down next week?

Uh, Kate? A word?

Just uh, one sec. And then we...

Urgent! Sorry, uh, it's urgent.

- It's urgent, so just...
- Mm-hmm.

- (PROTESTERS CHANT)
- What?

Looks like Goldie's got an
army outside the building.

We're clean, you're dirty!

Sorry, are they protesting you?

I don't...

I think we're gonna hold off
on that follow-up meeting.

(GROANS)

PROTESTERS: (CHANTING) We're clean,
you're dirty!

We're clean, you're dirty!
We're clean, you're dirty!

We're clean, you're dirty!

We're clean, you're dirty!

- Okay.
- We're clean, you're dirty!

Okay, let's just calm down.

What's your plan, exactly, Kate?

- Because that's an angry mob.
- He's right.

- Things could get ugly, fast!
- Would you two stop?

I'm sure these people
will listen to some good,

old-fashioned communication.

- (SPLATS) Ugh!
- ROSIE: (GASPS)

- We're clean, you're dirty!
- Oh! Ah! Ohh!

Okay! Okay.

Okay, someone brought eggs.

Guys, listen to me, all right,

I empathize with your situation.

- Hey... oh! Oh!
- RICHARD: Oh! Oh.

- KATE: Okay!
- ROSIE: Oh no!

Well, it looks like people
don't want you to sabotage

their livelihood, Kate!

(THROWING GRUNTS)

- KATE: Oh! Okay! All right!
- GOLDIE: Oh... oh, no.

Okay! It hurts!

Oh dear, do you need
some Goldie's Goodness

to clean that up with?

(PROTESTERS LAUGH)

Ah?

Good job, ladies.

(PROTESTERS CHEER AND APPLAUD)

(PANICKED BREATHING)

This one is from me, it's um...

A three pack of soothers,
yeah, thanks, Gare.

Next.

Hey, Jenny, just slow down.

You look very sweaty.

Well, maybe if it wasn't
so g*dd*mn hot in here!

Okay, uh, these people
put a lot of time and energy

- into this, honey, okay?
- Yeah, but, City Hall...

We can go later.

A few weeks isn't going to k*ll anybody.

(SIGHS)

GENA: All right, next is Louise.

I know I gave you a hard time,
but I do wish the best

for both of you, and I can't wait
to meet that little one!

(PARTYGOERS CHUCKLE)

- (WRAPPING PAPER RUSTLES)
- (GASPS)

(PANICKED BREATHING)

_

I thought it was funny,
'cause, you know,

we all work together.

(GASPS SHARPLY) It's very clever.

(SHOCKED MURMURS)

(SHAKY EXHALE)

- (QUIET SOBS)
- (DOOR THUDS OPEN)

GENA: Hey, Jenny, you okay in there?

- Uh huh.
- Come on, you gotta admit,

that onesie's pretty damn cute.

- Uh huh.
- Well,

the cake is almost gone,
so you better hurry up.

I'll see you out there?

- Uh huh.
- Okay.

(FOOTSTEPS RECEDE)

(DOOR CREAKS)

JONATHAN: Okay,
moving on to "The Raccoon and the Rock."

Where we at here, guys?

Sloane, you connect with the author?

Actually,
I was hoping that I could do that.

Well, uh, I've already
cultivated a relationship

with the author,
so I think it's probably best

if I handle that invitation.

Mm, it's just,
I'd kinda like to take a cr*ck

at spearheading this whole account.

- (LAUGHS) Excuse me?
- Well,

I think it makes sense that
I run point on this one.

I mean, I am the one that got
you guys to pull the trigger.

And don't you want someone
capable running the account

once Sloane's not around?

Wait, you going somewhere?

Well, I-I assume you'll go on mat leave.

Wait, are you pregnant?

Congratulations, Sloane!

Oh my God, how far along, wow!

Oh my God,
we should- we should do something!

♪♪♪

- (KNOCKING)
- (SEETHING EXHALE)

LIONEL: Anne?

If you think I would betray
you by making out with Tomé,


we have bigger problems.

ANNE: Just shut the f*ck up and go away!

Why are you so mad?

Because something happened,
and you didn't tell me!

Because I didn't want
to go through this!


This is why you belong in
Anger Management, Anne.

Because I think that you are addicted

to being angry.

And sometimes I think that you

enjoy being like this.

Nobody likes being angry.

That's ridiculous.

Is it? Because you don't even
try to control it anymore.


You just let 'er rip,

and frankly, I am sick of it.

I mean, it used to be charming,

you just saying whatever
you thought all the time,

but now...

(WORRIED EXHALE)

Now I am honestly afraid of you.

Do you get that I walk
on eggshells around you,


just trying to tiptoe
through your emotions?


(SIGHS)

And the saddest part of it is that um...

when I was in Cochrane without you,

was the happiest I've been in a uh...

really, really long time.

(SIGHS)

♪♪♪

(CAR RUMBLES)

(DOOR SLAMS, FOOTSTEPS THUD)

(CHILD SHOUTS DISTANTLY)

No! Uh-uh. What are you doin' here?

- I'm here to see my nephew.
- No, you can't.

Okay, I have every right to
see my own flesh and blood

- whenever I want.
- No.

No more pop-ins, okay?

If you want to see Nathan Jr.,

you need to let me know
hours in advance.

Okay, that's ridiculous.

Well, he's with us,
as per his mother's wishes,

so from now on, I expect...

hours notice before you show up here.

Excuse me.

Well, I like to be a lot
more spontaneous than that.

Because I like to live in the moment.

I don't care what your crystals

and your numerology charts tell you.

When it comes to that boy,
I want it in writing.

One week... two weeks in advance.

Is that egg in your hair?

No.

♪♪♪

(PHONE VIBRATES)

Come on!

Hi!

HEADMASTER: Hi, Ms. Foster,
this is Headmaster Brown.

I'm calling about Charlie.

I-I think you should know
that he was acting a little...

strangely today.

He said he was... talking to a ghost,

something about a dead woman?

Oh God, yeah, this whole thing.

I'm sorry,
I don't know where it's coming from.

Well, he mentioned something
about his new brother,

I wonder if that might
have something to do

with his situation?

Oh... right.

So did you tell Charlie about death?

I'm-I didn't mean to.

I-he was asking so many questions,

and then he asked me where my mom was,

and I didn't know what to say.
I'm-I'm sorry.

No, of course, hey.
I'm not-I'm not angry.

I can only imagine what that must've...

Hey, where... Sorry, where is Charlie?

I don't know.

Uh... oh my God!

Hey, what are you doin'?

Charlie...

What do you got there?

I'm gonna go see her.

♪♪♪
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