♪
Tea?
Trendy coats,
bedrolls, saddlebags?
Ooooh! A surprise vacation
just for the two of us?
How thoughtful!
I hear Puerto Caballo is
lovely this time of year.
Sand like powdered sugar.
Um, Princess
Celestia is taking us
on an overnight goodwill
tour of Yakyakistan.
I just found out.
[gasp] So what you're saying is
no tea? Oh well, that's fine.
I wasn't thirsty anyway.
If you're looking
for something to do,
you could spend the evening
with Spike and Big Mac.
[laughter] Ha.
You aren't kidding.
They're very nice. They have
a "Top Secret" thing they do
whenever we leave
Ponyville,
although everypony
knows about it,
so it's not a
very good secret.
I think you'd
have fun with them.
"Fun?" With sidekicks?
Oh, you must think that
we're in a dimension
where everything
is opposite.
[poof!]
Da dee la! I'm Opposite Discord
and I want to hang out
with Spike and Big Mac!
I'm sure I'd have fun.
WELL GUESS WHAT, SASSAFRAS!
I'M OPPOSITE FLUTTERSHY
AND I'M SICK OF BEING NICE
AND QUIET ALL THE TIME!
[poof!]
Let me explain it to
you as simply as I can.
Me? Amazing. Them? Well,
I've already forgotten
who we're talking
about. You see?
All I'm saying is
it's an opportunity
to expand your
circle of friends.
Unless you're afraid
they won't like you.
Oh please, don't stoop to
tedious reverse psychology.
You're better than that.
It never hurts to
make new friends.
Hmph. Consider
it considered.
[poof!]
[gasp]
Couldn't I just come
with you instead?
♪ My little pony,
my little pony ♪
♪ Aaaahhh
♪ My little Pony
♪ I used to wonder what
friendship could be. ♪
♪ My Little Pony
♪ Until you all shared
its magic with me. ♪
♪ Big adventure!
♪ Tons of fun
♪ A beautiful heart! ♪
Faithful and strong! ♪
♪ Sharing kindness
♪ it's an easy feat
♪ And magic makes it
all complete! ♪
♪ To have my little pony
♪ Do you know you're all
my very best friends? ♪
♪
♪
I suppose this is
goodbye, then.
Have an absolutely
fabulous voyage.
[finger snap]
[whoosh]
Discord.
Well, it's not my fault
the new train route
leads into an active volcano.
Guess you'll have to stay.
Oh, you're no fun.
[finger snap]
[poof]
I got my bedroll, parka,
unattractive but
functional hikin' boots.
Uh, anything I
forgot, Pinkie Pie?
You're our resident
Yakyakistan expert.
Nope! I brought
Yeti food.
Did I forget to mention
there's a pony-eating Yeti
on Frostfield Glacier? We're
gonna have so much fun!
Ha. If he messes with us, I'll
turn that Yeti into confetti.
[train whistle and chugging]
Somepony's in an awful quick
hurry to get us outta here.
Don't y'all have too
much fun without us.
I bet you boys have big
plans. Right, Spike?
I'm sure I don't know what
you're talking about.
Although if I did, I
certainly wouldn't be
allowed to discuss
it with you girls.
Bye-bye!
[train whistle]
Bye y'all!
[train tracks rattling]
[train whistle]
[whispering]
Fascinating article, yes?
[whispering] Don't let them
come over, please don't
let them come over,
please, please, please!
Oh! Salutations, my friends!
Wish I could stay and chat,
but... I don't want to.
Wait! Um, we were wondering...
what are you up to tonight?
Here we go.
Do you want to, I
don't know... hang out?
Is that like
something you do?
Oh, Twilight's friend
and Applejack's
monosyllabic brother!
If only I weren't super
busy this evening.
I guess Guys' Night
will just be you and me.
A Guys' Night?
You mean a rowdy evening
of reckless revelry?
Zoot suits, fedoras,
swing dancing?
Eh, something like that.
You should totally come!
Three of us would be
way better than two.
That does sound
fun, actually.
Too bad you're busy.
Well, I suppose I
could squeeze you in
if I moved a few very
important ponies around.
June, honey? Be a dear,
reschedule Luna and Cay-Cay?
That's what I call Princess
Celestia. What a hoot.
In fact, clear
the whole evening.
Tonight is Guys' Night.
These fellas invited
me to spice things up
and bring a little class
to the whole affair.
[poof!]
Tonight will be the best
night of your lives.
And not just because you
get to bask in my greatness.
I do love basking in
things. See you tonight!
Twilight's castle. The fun
starts promptly at sundown.
Technically the fun
starts when I arrive,
but I'll make sure it's
around sunset. Adieu, fellas.
And... we have sundown.
Repeat: we have sundown.
I declare tonight's
GUYS' NIGHT ceremonies
officially... OPEN!
EYUP!
It's Guys' Night aw yeah
havin' fun now, aw yeah.
Eyup, eyup, eyup,
eyup, oh yeah.
♪ [trumpet fanfare]
What the hay?
[quick pitter patter]
Announcing the
much-anticipated arrival
of the Spirit of
Chaos and Disharmony,
the Purveyor of Pandemoneum,
Lord of Lawlessness,
Earl of Turmoil,
Bringer of Bedlam...
Du-du-dun-dun-dunana DISCORD!
[cheering & fast techno music]
So shall we hop to it?
I've made a list of the
rowdiest establishments
in Ponyville. It's
rather short.
Actually we're staying here.
I hope you like
AWESOME GAMES!
Games! I love games.
I'm great at games.
[poof!]
Famous Ponies Charades?
Oh this is an easy
one. Who am I?
Huh? Huh?
OH, COME ON!
Uh, I'm talking
about a real game.
Oh, you mean like trapping
best friend ponies
in hedge mazes and turning
them against each other.
Those were the days.
[meow]
Not exactly. Wait here.
Whatever it is,
it can only get better
by adding me to the mix.
Spike: OK!
In a world where
evil reigns supreme,
a small band of
warriors stands tall
against the darkness. This
is... Ogres & Oubliettes.
[gasp]
Oh this looks like--
--the best game
ever? You're right!
Yes.
Ogres & Obliettes is a fantasy
role-playing adventure game.
Our goal? Defeat the
evil Squid Wizard,
or as we call him [little
snort laugh] "The Squizard."
[fake laugh]
[laughter]
The Squizard has laid
siege to the last free city
in Spiketopia; that's
the name of the land.
He's kidnapped a beautiful
unicorn princess
named Shmarity.
Uh, which is like a
normal name in Spiketopia,
so, you know, don't
think about it too much.
Fear not. Your romantic
delusions are safe with me.
First things first: you've got
to create a character. Name?
How 'bout... "Discord."
The whole point of the
game is you get to use
your imagination and
be someone you're not.
I'm Garbunkle, a
famous magician.
Everyone treats me with
the utmost respect.
Just like in real life.
Now, don't get jealous, but
I'm a level enchanter with
major skill points assigned
to intellect and perception.
Go on. I'm listening.
Big Mac's character is
Sir McBiggun, a level
black knight unicorn
from Castle Chadwick.
I'm listening.
When his king aligned
himself with the Squizard,
Sir McBiggun would not
besmirch his honor.
Enope.
I'm listening.
And so it came to pass, the
magician and black knight
vowed to rid Spiketopia
of the evil Squizard.
So, your character's name...
I already have the best
name in the universe.
Why would I change it for
something like Captain Wuzz?
Captain Wuzz it is!
[groan]
What class are
you, Captain Wuzz?
There's archers,
mages, rogues...
Can I suggest we take a
break and, I don't know,
go out and have some fun?
Ponyville's not going
to paint itself red.
You'll love it once we get
started. How about an archer?
Sounds just as miserable as
the other options, so fine.
"Sir McBiggun," are you
prepared to enter the world
of Ogres & Oubliettes?
Eyup.
Discord, or should I say,
"Captain Wuzz," are you--
Oh, get on with it.
[die clatters]
We find ourselves
trapped in the dungeon
of the evil Squizard. The
bars are locked tight.
The bars exist...
...in our imagination.
Really, you describe things
and then we pretend it's real.
It is real...in
our imagination.
It's your turn first.
What do you want to do?
Curse myself for attending
this infernal evening?
Oh ha ha, oh you
mean in the game.
Well, you can do
whatever you want.
Then I roll this -sided die
to see if you're successful.
I stick my head through
the bars and demand
for the immediate release
of the Lord of Chaos.
That's a big risk.
You have to roll a seventeen
or higher to succeed.
Oh. Bad idea. The
guard gets mad.
This spell here. I transform
him into a parsnip.
You need eleven intelligent
points to cast a
"Transform into Root
Vegetable" spell.
I'm not intelligent?!
I cast it anyway because
this game is stupid.
The spell backfires...
...so your claws grow leaves
and transform into parsnips.
He heh. Parsnips.
[snarl]
The guard laughs.
He calls his friends
over and they laugh too.
[laughing]
Don't you laugh at
ME, Big Mac!
Does it really say
that? Let me see!
As you get angrier,
everypony laughs harder.
[guffaws]
I seal Sir McBiggun
in a magic bubble
until he stops laughing.
I told you, you
can't do magic.
[whoosh]
Enope! Enope! Enope!
Not intelligent
enough, please...
Cut it out, Discord!
Oh, this game is
insufferable!
Let me show you a
real Guys' Night.
♪ [big band swing]
Ahhhhh, this is the
life. Jazz, dancing,
the best table magic can buy.
This is what Guys' Night is
all about. Am I right, fellas?
Eyup!
I know you probably
didn't do this on purpose,
but this table's the
perfect size and shape!
I don't think so.
Let's have a drink.
Chocolate milkshakes?
No, we want to go
back to Ogres and-
Oh, how about a
different game?
[poof!]
Those are
very bad cards.
Stop messing with
us, we want--!
A dance contest?
♪ [very fast swing jazz]
Surprise! We won.
DISCORD!
Yes...?
Look, we don't want
to do these things.
We want to play our game.
If you don't want to
play with us, you can...
I don't know, sit and watch.
Sit and watch?
Fine! We'll play your game.
ARE YOU READY TO ENTER THE
WORLD OF OGRES & OBLIETTES?
[zap]
Sir McBiggun?
EYUP!
And... I'm Garbunkle?
That means...
Sweetness! We're in the
game! Check it out! Ka-ZAM!
[zaps]
♪ [imperious theme]
It's Guys' Night oh yeah!
In the game now oh yeah!
Discord! Where are you?!
This is great! You
made the game real!
[evil laugh] Aren't
games fun?!
Should we be worried he's
using his scary voice?
Behold. I AM THE SQUIZARD!
[frightened whimpers]
Oh, you're welcome.
att*ck!
[w*r cries]
RUN!
Discord: You find
yourself on a b*ttlefield.
A barrage of arrows
rains down on you.
If you roll a fifteen
or higher,
the shield protects you.
Fourteen or lower, and,
well, HA HA you get the idea.
[thud]
Seventeen! Lucky you!
Boo!
[screams] Discord!
[poof!]
Sir McBiggun, I'd cover the
entrance if I were you.
This isn't funny.
Isn't this what
every gamer wants?
To live the game. Like this!
[zaps]
Agh!
[w*r cries]
This kinda hurts.
Like, real pain!
Oh, how kind of
you to notice.
It's the little details
that really bring
alternate dimensions to
life, wouldn't you say?
Discord, this is awful!
Of course it is!
Spiketopia will be mine!
And Rarity shall be my bride!
I mean "Schmarity."
[zaps]
Agh!
Why are you doing
this? You're the worst!
If I'm the worst, then
why did you invite me?
Because we felt
bad for you!
Because you-- WHAT!?
[finger snap]
We're OK. We're OK! No
thanks to you, Discord!
YOU felt sorry for ME?
Who wouldn't? Fluttershy
told us you practically
begged her to stay, and
then at the train station,
you were just standing
there, all alone.
This can't be. I'm supposed
to feel sorry for you.
Because I'm me,
and you're you.
We only invited you
to be nice.
I mean, you're
kind of a weirdo.
Eeyup.
I ruined your night, and you
don't even think I'm cool?
Oh, how embarrassing.
I should go. I have
a lot of...
OTHER friends I
need to see tonight.
Good.
Yes, so many other friends.
Farewell, Garbunkle
the Magician
and Brave Sir McBiggun.
May providence smile
upon thee and thy quest
to rid Spiketopia of
the dreaded Squizard.
When I say it that way, the
game doesn't sound half-bad.
Oh well.
[sigh] It's better
this way, right?
Eyup.
Because now he can't bother
us cause he's off somewhere
by himself... all
alone. With no friends.
Eyup.
[sigh]
Ahem.
We find ourselves in the
dungeon of the evil Squizard.
The bars are locked,
and oh who am I kidding?
We should give him
another chance.
[Ahem] Captain Wuzz?
Can you hear me?!
Oh, you realized
how amazing I am
and that I make you cooler
just by being around me?
Uh no, no, actually that's
not what I meant to say.
[mumble mumble]
What...?
I'm... [mumble....mumble].
We can't hear you.
Enope.
I'm trying to say
I'm sorry, all right?
I'm sorry for
ruining your game,
and I'm sorry that I thought
I was better than you.
Now let's play before this
evening gets any sappier,
shall we?
Eyup. [Whisper]
Huh? Yeah, yeah OK!
What if we forgot the board
and the pieces for a minute?
I mean, the whole
"game coming to life"
was completely terrifying,
but also kinda the
best thing ever.
So, uh Big Mac and
I were wondering...
what if you toned it
down just a teensy bit?
[chattering]
Huh?
[w*r cries]
I've got your
back, Captain Wuzz!
[clashing metal]
[panting]
[evil laughter]
Garbunkle, follow my lead!
Bullseye!
Nice one!
It's Guys' Night / aww yeah
/ havin' fun now / aww yeah.
We should just close the
door and let them finish...
whatever this is.
No way! Did you see Big Mac's
sword! I totally want in!
Yeah, I don't know
what it is,
but it looks like
super-duper fun!
GUYS' NIGHT!
♪ My Little Pony
♪ My Little Pony
♪ My Little Pony
♪ friends