03x11 - Florence in Love

[bunniefuu]

♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ We finally got a
piece Of the pie ♪

♪ Fish don't fry
In the kitchen ♪

♪ Beans don't
burn On the grill ♪

♪ Took a whole lot of tryin' ♪

♪ Just to get up that hill ♪

♪ Now we're up
In the big leagues ♪

♪ Gettin' our turn at bat ♪

♪ As long as we live
It's you and me, baby ♪

♪ Ain't nothin'
wrong With that ♪

♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ We finally got A
piece of the pie ♪♪

[HUMMING]

Now, let's see.

I got his coffee, I got his
juice and I got his toast.

That ought to do it.

Come and get it.

You sure it's all right?

Sure, T.J.

Mr. and Mrs.
Jefferson ain't up yet.

[CHUCKLES]

Now, this is what I
call breakfast in style!

You keep treating me like this

and I'll be staying
overnight more often.

[LAUGHS]

Now, you ain't got
time for that, T.J.

Sit down and drink your coffee
and I'll get you some marmalade.

Oh, no, no. Uh-uh.

I'd rather have me
some brown sugar.

That ain't on the menu.

Whoo!

This is some home
the Jeffersons got here.

And that shower! Water coming
at you from every which way.

You know, I'm cleaning
places I ain't never even seen.

You're a mess, T.J.

I'd sure like to be able
to live the way they do.

Well, you will,

but only for the next half-hour.

Hey, they're not
gonna be mad at me

for staying over and having
Sunday breakfast with you,

are they?

No! I told you, T.J.

When I moved in, Mrs. Jefferson
said their house was my house.

Uh-huh. So don't worry about it.

Yeah. But I'm wearing his robe.

Will you relax? They ain't
gonna be up for another hour yet.

You'll be long gone by then.

Yeah. You right.

Is something wrong
with the coffee?

Yeah. The cream.

We ain't got no cream.

That's what's wrong with it.

Maybe I can borrow some
from Mr. Bentley next door.

Hey, don't go to no
trouble on my account.

Oh, I ain't. I'm doing
it on my account.

If there ain't no
cream in this house

when Mr. Jefferson gets up,

child, this will be the
most blasphemous Sunday

you ever heard.

[YAWNS AND SHUDDERS]

Oh, George, I thought you
were still in the bathroom.

Oh, I see you've
made the coffee.

That was so nice of you.

Oh, I really needed this.

I got out of bed
before I realized

I wasn't awake yet.

I noticed you didn't have
any trouble sleeping last night.

You sawed enough wood to
see us through a cold winter.

George?

[CLEARS THROAT]

Talking to you
sometimes seems like

I'm talking to a stranger.

Well, don't just sit there like
a statue. Answer me, George.

George!

Good morning, ma'am.

George!

George!

I'm here. I'm here.

Oh, George!

George!

Have you seen my robe?

George... [STAMMERING]

What?!

[STAMMERING]

Say what?

Big trouble.

Something happen to my robe?

Yes. Uh, no.

There's a man in
there. A burglar.

What? A burglar?
What's he stealing?

Toast and coffee.

Stand back.

Be careful, George.

I'll be careful. I'll let him
have it where it hurts the most.

All right, Weezy, hold the door.

GEORGE: Close your eyes.

I know you can't
stand the sight of blood.

Okay, chump, I'm
coming after you.

Aaagh! Aaagh!

Don't sh**t! Don't sh**t!

You're not?

No, I'm gonna
b*at you with this.

Don't hit him, George. Why not?

He's wearing your robe.

Well, take off my robe!

I can't!

There's a lady present.

Who are you, anyway?

Oh, T.J. Davis.

Hey, man, I'm not trying
to rob you. You see...

Yeah, I see a man
eating up all my breakfast,

scaring my wife half to
death, and wearing my robe!

I can explain that.

Yeah, well, you explain
it to the cops. Come on!

Shut up! Cool it, man.

Listen, I didn't do
nothing. Really, I didn't.

Oh, good morning, Mr. Jefferson.

I see you met T.J.

You know this man?

Of course I know
him, Mrs. Jefferson.

I wouldn't let a stranger
spend the night here.

Spend the what?

Mr. Jefferson,
this is T.J. Davis.

Hi. Spend the what?!

She said "spend the night."

Spend the what?!

I don't think they're too
happy about that, Florence.

You damn right, J.T.

That's T.J.

No. J.T. for "Jive Turkey."

Hold it, George.

Now, you're not
gonna get anywhere

insulting Florence's guest.

That's right.

On the other hand, I think
you owe us an explanation.

Your friend scared
me half to death.

Oh, I'm sorry Miss Jefferson.

You see, we was
out real late last night

and T.J. brought me home.

Just like any gentleman would.

Uh-huh.

And you invited him to spend
the night, like any lady would not.

Uh, let her finish, George.

Well, it was raining
real hard, Mrs. Jefferson.

T.J. lives way up in the Bronx.

Right.

I didn't see any harm
in letting him stay over.

Nothing worse than
being mugged in the rain.

[LAUGHING]

I can understand
that, but... But nothing.

Look, if I wanted bums
spending the night here,

I wouldn't be a cleaner.

I'd be in the Salvation Army.

Who you calling "bum"?

Hey, hey, hey! That's
all right, Florence.

Ahem, I can understand
Mr. Jefferson being upset.

Uh, maybe it'd
be best if I just left.

Yeah, without my robe.

Yeah. I'll get changed.

Mr. Jefferson, you had no
call to talk to my friend like that.

And you have no call to
shout at my husband like that.

That's right. I ain't the one
that did something wrong.

Are you saying I did?

Well, if the suit
fits, step in it.

You better get one
thing straight, honey.

Just because T.J.
spent the night here,

don't mean something happened.

He was in your bedroom.

Well, so was a TV set
and a dressing table,

but they wasn't in
bed with me neither.

Uh, that part's none of our
business anyway, George.

Oh, yes, it is. I don't want any
of that part in this apartment.

It's none of our business.

If I was you, I'd
listen to my wife.

When it comes to brains
in this family, you outvoted.

One to nothing.

When it comes to nerves,

you could carry
the whole country.

Ha-ha-ha!

Uh, George, we are not here
to judge Florence's morals.

What morals?

Look, I'm here to get
me some breakfast,

which her boyfriend
already stole.

He didn't. I gave it to him.

Oh, yeah? Well, it's
coming out of your salary.

Let's see. That's one cup of
coffee and one piece of toast.

Two weeks pay ought to cover it.

Uh, I guess I'll be... going.

Thanks for the
loan of your robe.

You lucky I didn't
loan you my foot.

Which one, the one
you're standing on

or the one in your mouth?

Cool it, Florence.

I'm truly very sorry that I
frightened you, Mrs. Jefferson.

You're a nice lady.

Oh, thank you.

Look, are you gonna leave
after the door is open or before?

I'm going, man. I'm going.

Bye, baby.

T.J.: See you later.

Look, you might as well
unpucker your lips. He's gone.

You scared him, Mr. Jefferson.

You damn right! He's
lucky that's all I did!

I don't ever want to
see his face again.

Why not? It's obvious why not.

Because I said so!

Well, I say different.
Well, you don't count!

George, we can't stop T.J.

from calling on
Florence if he wants to.

That's right. You sure can't.

I think he really loves
me, Miss Jefferson.

That's wonderful!

And there ain't
nothing wrong with him

spending the night
again if he wants to.

Oh, yes, there is.

Why are you taking his side
against me, Mrs. Jefferson?

Because I'm the side
her bread is buttered on.

It's not a question
of sides, Florence.

I just think you was wrong

to bring a man in
here without telling us.

Why didn't you ask?

What would you have
said if I had woke you up

at 2 in the morning
to ask permission?

I would have said no.

That's why I didn't ask.

You shouldn't have brought a
stranger in our house like that.

Wait a minute.

You just told Mr. Jefferson
it was none of your business.

I said it was none of our
business what you did with T.J.

Well?

But it's plenty of our business

where you did it.

This is our home!

Well, it's my home too.

Didn't you tell me your
home was my home?

Yes.

But not for you to have visitors
at night without permission.

Oh, I see.

You can have visitors
without asking my permission

because it's your home.

Exactly.

But I can't have visitors
without asking your permission

because it's my home.

Will you stop twisting
everything around?

You know exactly what I mean!

Look, the point is, we're
the boss and you the maid.

Keep out of this, George!

If we say you can't have
somebody in your bedroom,

we mean it.

Well, for your information,

T.J. slept in the bedroom

and I slept out
here on the sofa.

So when I tell you

you can take your job and
stick it in your ear, I mean it.

I quit!

Oh, George, she quit!

Yeah, Weez! See,
you handled it perfectly.

[LAUGHS]

I almost stopped
her from leaving.

But then Florence said something
and George said something,

and I tried to say something,

but between George's something
and Florence's something,

my something
didn't have a chance.

I know what you mean.

Well, I don't. What
were these somethings?

What did they actually say?

Well, it was sort
of street talk.

Street talk?

Like what I say to you
when I get really mad.

Oh.

Oh, that's terrible!

I'm worried about her.

She hasn't got a place of
her own and no place to go.

Where could she be?

Oh, I'm sure when
she calms down,

she'll think it over
and come back.

I don't think so.

You know, in her own way,

Florence can be as
stubborn as George,

and you know how
stubborn George can be.

No. Tell us about it.

Well, George can
be so stubborn...

[STAMMERS]

Oh!

See you later.

So long, girl.

Bye.

You know, Helen, I
can never understand

why people waste
their energy fighting.

If they'd only take the
time to think things through.

There's always an
answer to every problem.

All right, Solomon.

Suppose we had a maid

who brought a man
home without telling us.

How would you handle it?

Easy. I'd say,
"Helen, take care of it."

[DOORBELL BUZZES]

Let's see if you
can take care of that.

Why, Florence, come in!

Do you mind if I spend
the night, Mr. Willis?

No. Not at all.
Then I'll come in.

Hello, Miss Willis.

Florence, I'm so
glad to see you!

I got a problem.

Yes, I know. Louise
told us all about it.

Here. Let me take your coat.

Sit down, Florence.

Thank you.

Would you like some
coffee? No, thank you.

How about a drop of sherry?

No, thank you. You
look all worn out!

I bet you could use
a little pick-me-up.

I don't wanna put
you to no bother.

It's no trouble at all.

Well, in that case,

I'll have a muscatel
and ginger ale

with some crushed ice,
lemon juice and cherries.

Would you settle
for a dry martini?

If that's all you got.

Coming right up.

Florence, where
have you been all day?

Well, at first I just
walked around.

But it didn't take
me long to figure out

I was long on pride
and short on bread.

So I went over to T.J.'s house
to see if he could put me up.

Hmm! That turned
out to be a big mistake.

Wasn't he happy to see you? No.

And neither was his
wife and four kids.

Oh, Florence, that's terrible!

It sure was.

But it's a lucky thing
I found out in time

because that man
was really after me.

But it's a good
thing I remembered

what my mama told me, too.

She said, "Florence, a man is
always gonna sweet-talk you.

But until he says,
'I do, ' you don't."

Don't worry, Florence.

Someday you'll find a
man who's right for you.

Yes. There are lots
of good men around.

Hmm! The good ones
are either married or dead.

Or both.

You know what makes
me mad, though?

To think I lost the
best job I ever had

on account of that turkey.

And from the way
Mr. Jefferson was talking,

ain't no way for me
to get it back either.

He can change
his mind, can't he?

I mean, any normal human
being can be reasoned with.

That leaves George out.

No, I'm serious, Helen.

I'm firmly convinced that
with the right approach,

even George can be reached.

Oh, Mr. Willis, would
you do that for me?

Oh, thank you! I knew
I could count on you!

Me?

Oh, Tom, I'm so proud of you.

I'll let Louise know
you're coming.

[STAMMERING]

That's it, Tom. Practice what
you're gonna say to George.

[LAUGHS]

[CLEARS THROAT]

She is?

Oh, good!

Uh-huh.

Well, thanks for
telling me, Helen.

Uh, George, can I talk
to you for a second?

Sure. Well, Florence...

That's it. Time's up.

Now, you listen to me!

Florence is upstairs
with the Willises.

That's perfect! A mixed-up
maid for a mixed-up couple.

[LAUGHS]

She's not working for them.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Oh, yeah? Well, she
never worked for us neither.

Oh, come in, Tom.

Thank you.

If you're here to get me to
take Florence back, forget it.

No. She left her Bible here.
She asked me to pick it up for her.

I'll get it.

Thank you.

Oh, oh, oh!

She's gonna need that
Bible where she's going.

Oh, yeah? Where's she
going? To live with her cousin.

Oh! That's nice.

In Mississippi. Where?

Her cousin's got a
sharecropper's shack down there.

One room, but I
guess it'll be big enough

for the seven of them.

Seven?

Here you are.

Oh, thank you, Louise.

GEORGE: Hey, wait a minute.

Why does she have to go there?

Can't she find a job up here?

Oh, I'm afraid
her spirit's broken.

She found out T.J.'s married.

Married?

Yes.

She just wants to get as far
away from here as possible.

Well, this should
give her some comfort

on the bus ride to Mississippi.

Hold it.

BOTH: Yes, George?

I'll take her back.

Hey, that's great! Oh, George!

Only on my terms.

You tell her that from now on

she's gonna have to
start acting like a real maid.

She's gonna do what
I say when I say it,

and no back talk and
funny looks neither.

Now, George, you know
Florence will never go for that.

I'm paying her to be a servant.
Damn it, she gonna act like one.

But... But nothing.

Every time I say something,

y'all have to go "But."

You heard me.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Florence!

Well, ain't you gonna let me in?

You're coming back?

I sure am.

Well, didn't Mr. Willis
tell you the conditions?

He sure did.

And you don't mind?

Why should I mind?

If that's the kind of
maid Mr. Jefferson wants,

that's the kind of
maid he's gonna get.

I don't understand.

Oh, you here, huh?

Oh, hello, Master Jefferson!

I's back.

I's ready to wait on you, sir.

What can I do for you?

Well, you can fix me a drink.

Mm-hm! Right away!

But first, you bring
yourself right over here

and set yourself down!

Because you works
hard and you's tired

and you needs your rest!

Now, ain't that better?
Yeah, I guess so.

Now, let's take your
poor, tired little feet

and put 'em right up here.

Now, ain't that nice?

What y'all want to drink?

Uh, get me a Scotch and soda.

I'm gonna fix this just
like you likes it, boss.

And if you don't like
it, you just tell me,

because I do it
over, I don't mind!

♪ Way down upon
The Swanee River ♪

♪ Far, far away ♪

♪ Oh, darkies How my
heart beats never... ♪♪

Here you are, boss.

I sure hope you likes it.

Is it all right?

It's okay.

I'll freshen it up for you.

Okay, George, is that
good enough for you?

Well, she ain't perfect
yet, but she's getting there.

Oh, yes, Helen. The first
couple of days, George loved it.

He was in his glory.

But now he's ready
to climb the walls.

Because Florence
won't leave him alone.

She waits on him hand and foot.

She's done everything
but dust his eyeballs.

You know what he's been
doing for the last couple of days?

The moment he gets home,
he locks himself in his room.

Anything to get away from her.

No. He can't tell her to stop.

You know George.

That would be
admitting he was wrong.

I gotta hang up now. Here
come Master Jefferson.

Hello, George. Shh!

Where's Florence?

She's in her room. Good!

Good evening,
Master Jefferson, sir.

What are you wearing?

Why, this is my
new maiding uniform.

I's bought it today, sir.

Why? Are we having
pancakes for dinner?

Ooh, that's funny!

You the funniest
man, Mr. Jefferson!

Ain't he funny, Mrs. Jefferson?

If he were any funnier,
they'd put him away.

Oh! Oh! You give me them
shoes, Master Jefferson.

For what? They need shining!

Look, Florence...

Now, just let me
help you take them off.

You don't have to do that.
I don't mind. Lift your foot.

You ain't supposed to
be shining nobody's shoes.

Don't you think I
can do a good job?

Sure you could, but...

Then let me help
you take them off.

Florence, just get off my shoes!

Oh, lawsy me! I
done made you mad!

You's disappointed in me!

No, I ain't. I...

I'm sorry, boss! Stop
it! Hey! Stop it, Florence!

Will you get this woman off me?

Hey!

[DOORBELL RINGS]

I'll get it! I'll get it!

Good afternoon,
Master Bentley, sir.

I say! I bet you'll
win first prize.

Prize?

Why, this ain't no costume.
This is my maiding uniform.

Excuse me, Master
and Mrs. Jefferson,

but it's Master
Bentley from next door

a-come a-calling.

We can see that.

Well, now y'all's done heard
it, y'all want me to let him in?

Just get out of his way!

Yes, sir, Master Jefferson.

Excuse me for
intruding like this,

but by the sheerest coincidence,

today is my day
to run out of cream.

May I borrow some?

Oh, I don't know,
Master Bentley.

I'll have to ask the massa.

The massa?

Massa? Massa?

Can Master Bentley
have some cream, sir?

Yes.

Now, you just wait right
there, Master Bentley.

I'll get it for you, sir.
I'll be right back, sir.

And I won't be long, sir.

Um, don't tell me, now.

Um, Gone With the Wind.

Nope. It's Uncle George's Cabin.

Here's your cream,
Master Bentley.

I's sorry it took
me so long, sir.

I sure hope y'all enjoys it.

Well... Well, thank you,
Florence. I'm sure I will.

Mm-hm!

Yes, it looks like
very good, uh, cream.

Mm-hm!

White and everything.

Mm-hm!

Mm-hm.

Ooh, Master Bentley!

What? What is it? What is
it? Looky there! Looky there!

You's got a button
loose on your jacket.

Oh, yes. I'm sorry. I...
I'll fix it when I get home.

Oh, no, sir. That ain't
gentlemen's work, sir.

That's maiding work.

I'll get a needle and thread
and have it fixed in a jiffy.

Don't you worry about a thing!

Do you get the strange feeling

we're about to be
att*cked by boll weevils?

Here I come, Master Bentley.

Now, y'all just
take off that jacket

and I'll have it fixed
as nice as you please.

No, Florence, really.
Oh, Master Bentley.

Master Jefferson likes
me to do neat work.

Florence, will you
get off the man!

Oh, no, sir, Master Jefferson.

I can't let him leave
here looking like this.

Yes, you can, if you try.

Oh, no, sir. No,
sir, Master Bentley.

That would bring shame
on the house of my master.

Stop it, Florence!

Oh, no, sir, Master Jefferson!

You done showed me
the way. I's done wrong.

I was an untidy maid, but
you done showed me the light.

Will you cut it out,
Florence! Stop it. Stop it!

Say please.

Please.

That's better.

And don't you make me do
nothing like that again, you hear?

Where are you going, Florence?

To take off this dumb dress

so I can stop acting like a
dumb maid for a dumb master.

Well, Weezy, she's back.

[♪♪♪]

ANNOUNCER: The
Jeffersons was recorded on tape

in front of a studio audience.

♪ Movin', movin' on up ♪♪