03x23 - George the Philanthropist

Episode transcripts for the TV show "The Jeffersons". Aired: January 18, 1975 – July 2, 1985.*
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Spinoff series from "All in the Family" is about literal upward mobility of couple George and Louise Jefferson who move into a swanky high-rise building.
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03x23 - George the Philanthropist

Post by bunniefuu »

♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ We've finally got
A piece of the pie ♪

♪ Fish don't fry
In the kitchen ♪

♪ Beans don't
burn On the grill ♪

♪ Took a whole lot of tryin' ♪

♪ Just to get up that hill ♪

♪ Now we're up
In the big leagues ♪

♪ Gettin' our turn at bat ♪

♪ As long as we live
It's you and me, baby ♪

♪ There ain't nothin'
Wrong with that ♪

♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ We've finally got
A piece of the pie ♪

Oh, Mrs. Jefferson. You
want to see something?

My cousin just
sent me this picture.

It's me and her when
we was both kids.

Very nice. But which one is you?

Which one is the prettiest?

Well, they're both cute.
But this one is the prettiest.

That's me.

It's a very nice frame too.

Yeah, I took it off one
of your old family pictures

in the closet.

I figured nobody would miss it.

Florence, now,
you shouldn't have...

It was a picture of
your mother-in-law.

You're right. No
one will miss it.

My cousin's having a great
big birthday party this weekend.

It's too bad I can't be there.

Well, why can't you?

Because Mr. Jefferson
won't give me no time off.

Oh, sure he will.

Are we talking about the
same Mr. Jefferson I know?

Skinny little dude,
about 5-foot-7?

Six feet with his mouth open?

Florence!

Well, he do yell
a lot, don't he?

Well, not lately.

Haven't you noticed the
good mood he's been in?

Yeah, that's right.

He's been walking around
humming and smiling.

I thought he was sick.

He's happy because he's sure

he's going to win
an annual award

from the Black
Businessmen's Association.

What for?

For community service.

He's been trying
to win it for years.

But this time he's sure he's
beaten his only competition.

Who's that?

Did you ever hear of
Freddy's Chicken and Waffles?

Where the chicken
sticks to your ribs?

And the syrup sticks
to your chicken.

And when you finish,
you stick to the counter.

Anyway, Freddy just announced

that he's given 10 percent
discount to senior citizens.

So George topped him.

He's going to give them

20 percent off
on their cleaning.

You mean he's losing
money and he's still happy?

That ain't the
Mr. Jefferson I know.

Well, when George feels
good, I don't question it.

I just enjoy it.

Damn, damn, damn.

Now, that's the
Mr. Jefferson I know.

What's the matter?

That old no-good
jive turkey Freddy.

Some people will
stoop to anything.

What's he done now?

You know that old Baptist
church in Lennox Avenue, Harlem?

Yeah.

He's paying to have
the church repainted.

Oh, isn't that awful!

God will surely
punish him for that.

He's even got his
picture in here. Look.

See that ugly face?

Oh!

But why are you
getting so uptight

about Freddy
painting that church?

Uptight? I ain't uptight.

I never heard of anything
so low-down and sneaky

in all my life.

Painting a church isn't sneaky.

Well, he's doing it
behind my back, ain't he?

But he's doing
it to help people.

Wrong! He's doing
it to help himself.

What?

Look, painting that church
ain't nothing but a snow job

for winning that award.

You think he's
just trying to buy it?

Buy it?

Look, that chicken-and-waffle
turkey is stealing it from me!

You know what my problem
is? Well, you could start with...

I'm too nice.

Huh?

I'd never do something like
that just to win some award.

I've got some
kind of... Scruples?

Scruples? No, I ain't had
them since I was a teenager.

But I want that award.

Well, you could still win!

How?

I stand a better chance

of playing center
for the Globetrotters.

Don't worry about the award.

Oh, Weezy.

Just be proud that you've
still got your integrity.

Integrity ain't worth diddly.

That's not true.

[DOORBELL CHIMES]

What did it ever get me?

A clear conscience?

I mean something I can use.

Oh, Mr. Jefferson?

Who wants to know?

The name is Phillips,
Lester Phillips.

I'd like to talk to
him about charities.

Nothing doing.

For the Black
Businessmen's Association.

Oh!

I mean, he ain't doing
nothing that he can't wait on.

Come on in.

Are you the fundraiser?

That's right.

I'm contacting prominent
black businessmen in this area.

Oh, well, you came
to the right place.

I am George Jefferson.

[LAUGHS]

This is my wife, Louise.

A pleasure to meet
you, Mrs. Jefferson.

Can I get you some coffee?

If it's no trouble.

No trouble at all. Go and
make a fresh pot, Weez.

Me and Mr. Phillips got to talk.

Please.

[CHUCKLES]

You're probably
wondering why I called you.

You didn't call me.

Oh, yeah, but I was about to.

Yeah, I heard about this dude

that was paying to have
this church repainted.

You mean Freddy, the
chicken-and-waffle king.

That's him.

Yeah, I was the one who spoke
to him about making a contribution.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, a very
generous human being.

He sure is.

How generous? What?

Well, I mean, I was planning
on making a contribution myself

and I just wanted to get
sort of a ballpark figure.

I mean, how much did
good old Freddy lay down

to have this church repainted?

Seven hundred dollars.

Seven hundred dollars?
That's chump change.

I pledge 710.

And he also gave another 700

to buy wheelchairs
for the handicapped.

That comes to 1400.

Okay, put me down for 1410.

[LAUGHS]

That will be enough to put new
hubcaps on them wheelchairs.

You overwhelm me,
Mr. Jefferson. Thank you.

Oh, you wouldn't have any
books you'd like to give us?

Books? For Freddy's library.

He also gave another
600 for the college library.

Look, how much did this
turkey put down altogether?

Two thousand dollars.

Okay, I'm gonna
put the game on ice.

I pledge 3 grand to
any project you name.

Mr. Jefferson,

you're an exceptionally
generous human being.

It's my only fault.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Now, there is an old
closed-down youth center

on 123rd Street in Harlem.

What would you say

to using your
money to reopen it?

A youth center?

Oh, yeah, kids, eh?
That's a great idea.

Then I can count
on your contribution?

Sure! I'll check
with my accountant.

And you can come back in a
couple of days and pick it up.

Here's the coffee.

Thank you, Mrs. Jefferson.

I guess you find fundraising
a very fulfilling profession,

Mr. Phillips.

That's right, you go
around fulfilling your pockets

with other people's money.

This isn't my profession,
Mrs. Jefferson.

I'm just a businessman
like Mr. Jefferson here

willing to do my part.

You should be complimented.

Not me.

It's men like your husband
who deserve the compliments

for their contributions.

Contributions?

Oh, Weezy, Mr. Phillips has
many more appointments to make.

Well, I do have a couple, but...

We won't keep you any longer.

Yes, well, I hate to
leave in such a rush.

Oh, look, don't apologize.

I know how helping
people can keep you busy.

Bye.

Ah!

Nice guy.

Too bad he couldn't stay longer.

How much did you give, George?

Oh, I just gave
a little something

to help reopen the
youth center up in Harlem.

How much is "a
little something"?

[YAWNING] Oh, $3000.

Three thousand dollars?!

What's wrong with you?

I'd like to know what's behind
this sudden burst of charity.

Nothing. I'm just a soft touch.

And what I'm doing is going
to help some kids, right?

Well, a youth center would help.

I'm sorry I misjudged
you, George.

Your heart's in the right place.

Of course it is.

You can see it, I can see it,

and them judges on that award
committee are gonna see it,

because I am going to win.

Hey, Florence.

I'm taking Weezy out, so
you don't have to cook dinner.

Oh, I didn't bother
to cook dinner.

I'm visiting my cousin tonight.

You ain't going nowhere
till you bring out champagne.

We celebrating. Hey, Weezy!

Oh, we are?

Ain't that nice! A
going-away party for me.

Not me-and-you "we,"
me-and-Weezy "we."

Weezy!

Okay, okay, I'm coming, George.

I've got something to show you.

I know you're going to
find this very interesting.

"Alligators found in
New York sewers"?

Not that, this.

"Jefferson to reopen
youth center in Harlem."

That's nice.

And you know what
the best part is?

They spelled your name right?

No, the timing.

I got my story printed the same
day the awards committee votes.

Wonderful.

Weezy, what is wrong with you?

I thought you'd be
proud of what I'm doing.

George, it's not what you're
doing that's wrong, it's why.

You wouldn't be
helping those kids

if there wasn't
something in it for you.

What difference does it make?

They're getting a youth
center, I'm getting an award.

Everybody gets fat. Come on.

I'm taking you
out to dinner. But...

I got us some of that
bubbly stuff, Mrs. Jefferson.

Oh, I don't feel like
drinking anything, Florence.

I know what you mean, child.

That's why I don't
drink no more.

Of course, I don't
drink no less, neither.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello?

Yes?

I see.

All right, I'll tell him.

Goodbye.

I'll take some of that
champagne now, Florence.

But you just said...

That was someone from
the awards committee.

The voting is over.

Oh, and you'll have
a drink to celebrate.

No, to get up my courage. I
have to tell George he lost.

Hey! You popped the cork on
the champagne, Florence. Good.

That ain't nothing compared
to the cork that's going to pop.

What's she yapping about?

George, we have
to have a little talk.

We'll have a lot
of talk over dinner.

Get dressed. We're
gonna have a good time.

Ha!

Wanna bet?

What is her problem?

George, I have
something to tell you

but I don't quite
know how to do it.

You start by opening your mouth.

But I don't want you to get mad.

Weezy, do I look like I'm mad?

No, but... Well,
then, get to the point.

What have you done that
is going to make me mad?

I... [DOORBELL CHIMES]

I'll get the door.

No. Florence! FLORENCE: Yes?

There's the doorbell, dumbbell.

FLORENCE: Well, then,
some dumbbell better answer it.

You know, it's
terrible when you think

of all the animals that
are becoming extinct

and we still can't
get rid of her.

Oh, Mr. J, I just had
to tell you, I'm moved.

Oh, wow, Bentley. You
leaving the neighborhood?

Oh, no, nothing of the sort.
What I meant was, I'm touched.

Look, nobody's perfect.

You're just a little
weird, that's all.

George, I don't think you
know what Mr. Bentley is saying.

I know what he's saying.

What are you saying, Bentley?

Simply that I was
moved emotionally

after reading the story
about you in the newspaper.

You are a man of
rare compassion.

Yeah, I guess I am, ain't I?

As a matter of fact,
you've inspired me.

I'd like to join
your youth center.

You're too old, Bentley.

I mean, I'd like
to help out there.

Why? You ain't black.

George, you don't
have to be black

to help those kids in Harlem.

I know that, Weezy,

but them kids aren't
gonna understand

a word Bentley's saying.

No offense, Bentley, but you
do speak some funny English.

Couldn't I assist in some way?

That's why I got
the old ball out.

I'd love to teach those lads
the finer points of soccer.

Do you know anything
about soccer, Mr. J.?

Well, there's Florence.
I'd sure like to sock her.

Actually, soccer's becoming
increasingly popular

in the States.

Are you kidding?

Those kids wouldn't play
no sissy game like that.

Sissy?! My word, soccer's
a rough sport, Mr. J.

I know. I've played it.

The players wear no
padding, no helmets.

You get knocked down,
stepped on, kicked in the head...

Oh, so that's what
happened to you.

[LAUGHS]

Actually, I used to be
pretty good at the game.

Hey! Watch it!

Darting down the
wings... Be careful!

And then passing to the center!

Well, the center was
supposed to get that.

BENTLEY: Sorry.

Isn't that supposed
to be played outdoors?

Exactly. It'll be
splendid for the lads.

The fresh air, the green
grass, the running about...

Look, Bentley, them
kids up in Harlem

ain't got no fresh air.

They ain't never
seen no green grass.

Only time they
get a chance to run

is when the cops
is chasing them.

Well, I still think they'd
get a boot out of the game.

Do you get it? Boot?

Also, it would teach
them to use their heads.

How far can you kick this ball?

Oh, a long way, but I
couldn't show you in here.

Could you show me in the hall?

I'd be glad to. Good.

You see, what you do is...

Come on, Weezy. Get
dressed. I'm starving.

George, isn't it wonderful what
happens when you get involved?

Yeah, it sure is,

and right now I'd
love to be involved

with a big, thick, juicy steak.

But even if you didn't win,

you would still want to reopen
that youth center, wouldn't you?

Weezy, Weezy, Weezy.

The youth center and
me winning the award

ain't got nothing to
do with each other.

Oh, I'm sure glad to hear that.

Good, now get dressed.

Because you didn't win.


Say what?

I got a call from Bill Robison,

your friend on the
awards committee.

He said it won't be
announced until tomorrow,

but they've already
voted and... I lost.

George, George, George.

There are no losers
in a thing like this.

Well, did I win the award? No.

Then I lost.

It wasn't a game, George.

How could they do this to me?

They didn't do anything to you.

The committee just
voted for the man

they felt was most deserving.

No, they didn't,
otherwise I'd have won.

I wonder who they gave it to.

He didn't say.

Then it's got to be Freddy.

I just know Freddy catered
that judges' award meeting

with his old greasy chicken
and those soggy waffles.

George, what really counts
is the good deeds you did.

You talking about
the youth center?

[LAUGHS]

Luckily that's one good
deed I ain't done yet,

and that's one deed
that ain't gonna get did.

But you promised!

Look, Weezy, I'll make
you another promise too.

I'm not tossing around no
3000 dead presidents for nothing.

So the youth
center's nothing, huh?

Well, it ain't no
award, that's for sure.

Forget that award!

Forget about it? Weezy, look,
Freddy bought that award, Weezy.

I think that is disgusting.

Well, goodbye, y'all.

Where are you going?

Is he my daddy?

No.

Then where I'm going
ain't none of his business.

Where is she going?

Well, you told her she could
take a couple of days off.

I changed my mind. Get
back and start cooking dinner.

But you said we were
going out to dinner.

I changed my
mind about that too.

Well, I ain't changed my
mind. I'm going to catch my bus.

You are staying here!
This is your boss talking.

Like hell I am.

And that's the
champagne talking,

because Florence don't cuss.

I wonder if it's
legal to k*ll a maid.

George, what about
keeping your promise

about reopening
that youth center?

Look, Weezy, if I did that,
I'd be worse than Freddy.

You'll have to
explain that one to me.

Freddy did all those things
just to buy the award, didn't he?

Well, yes, I suppose so.

And winning the award is
a lot better than losing it?

Of course. Okay.

If I did some good things
just to lose the award,

that's worse than
doing them to win it.

You sure cleared that up.

Good.

[DOORBELL CHIMES]

And this subject is
closed, understand?

Yes, George. Just like the
doors of the youth center.

Hey there, Mr. Jefferson.

How do you know my name?

Because the lady I
met in the elevator

told me if a funny-looking dude
came and answered the door,

it's George Jefferson.

I'm going to k*ll that Florence.

She bugs me even
when she ain't here.

But she was wrong.

You ain't really funny-looking.

Good.

I'd say grumpy, maybe.

Or, like, spaced out or...

What's on your mind, kid?

Sitting down.

Can I come in?

No.

George! That's no way to talk.

Hello. I'm Mrs.
Jefferson. Can I help you?

Yeah, I'm Jason
King of the Gypsies.

He's lying, Weezy.

The king of the gypsies is an
old man with rings in his ears.

King is my name, man.

The Gypsies is my
g*ng up in Harlem.

Uh, what do you want, Jason?

I've got something to deliver.

Come in. Weezy!

Come in, Jason.

Say!

Whoo!

[LAUGHS]

This is some crib
you've got here.

Whoo! This is all right.

Look, Jackson.

Jason. Oh!

Jason. What do you want?

We used to live in
Harlem too, you know.

With all your bread?
You've got to be kidding.

We didn't have money then.

Oh? Well, what did you do?

Knock over some bank?

Look, King Gypsy,
whatever you call yourself,

what do you want?

Well... Some ice cream, maybe?

Yeah. Weezy!

Doesn't he remind
you of Lionel, George,

when we used to live in Harlem?

No, because Lionel
had better sense

than to go around
bothering strangers.

I'll get the ice cream.

Uh, hmm... I only eat chocolate.

I think we have a
couple of scoops left.

Hey! I was saving
that for after supper.

Here.

What's that?

It ain't going to
bite you. Read it.

"To George Jefferson from
the 123rd Street Gypsies,

because he cared about us."

This is for me?

See, nobody else cared
about the youth center.

Then we heard about
all the stuff you was doing,

so, well, you okay by us.

Grumpy, but still
okay, you know?

Hey, you all right?

Uh...

you came all the way
down here to bring me this?

Yep. Phew.

Hey, you know, that
Lionel, he sure is lucky

to have an old man like you.

Think so, huh?

Hey, hey, hey. Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm cool.

Uh...

your father's lucky to
have a son like you too.

Oh, my old man
d*ed when I was 10.

Oh, yeah? My father
d*ed when I was a kid.

But I managed to
do all right for myself.

[LAUGHS]

Yeah.

Hey, you know, when I get rich,

I think I'm going to
help people out too.

I mean, that's what having
money's all about, right?

Yeah.

Sure is.

Hey, Weezy,

look what Jason and
the Gypsies gave me

because of that youth center.

It's beautiful.

It really is.

But didn't George tell you?

I'm afraid he's decided...

To put even more
money into the center.

But, George...

And don't try to talk
me out of it, Weezy.

You really gonna do a
number on that center, ain't you?

Look, when George
Jefferson does something,

he does it up right.

All right!

Sooner or later.

Jason, I have a big
bowl of ice cream

in the kitchen for you.

Oh!

Chocolate?

Chocolate.

Well, all right!

[LAUGHING]

Oh, George,

how come you always
manage to surprise me?

I mean, you're
supposed to help people.

That's what having
money's all about.

[DOORBELL CHIMES]

Well, I'm sure glad one of
us thinks that way, George.

Thank you.

Hey! Come on in.

Hello, Mrs. Jefferson.

Well, I guess you
know why I'm here.

That donation we
discussed? $3000 wasn't it?

Wrong, Phillips.

I told you to come here tonight

but it wasn't to
pick up no 3 grand.

I'm upping the ante.

Oh, George!

I've already made
up my mind, Weezy.

[LAUGHS]

By the way, Mr. Jefferson,

since the youth
center is your project,

the people up there felt it
should be named after you.

Isn't that a nice idea?

No, it ain't. It's not?

I want to name it after the
person who's responsible

for me being as
successful as I am today,

somebody who taught me

that winning is a lot
more fun than losing.

Who's that, George?

My dad.

Oh. Well, that's nice too.

Tell them they can call it the
William Jefferson Youth Center.

What a nice memorial.

Three thousand and ten?

You're very generous.

Of course I am.

More generous than that Freddy,
even if he did win the award.

Oh, Freddy didn't win that.

He didn't?

No. The committee went
a different way this year.

Instead of picking
the businessman

who donated the most money,

they looked for the man

who donated most
of his personal time.

Why didn't I think of that?
Giving time is a lot cheaper.

Maybe you'll
think of it next year.

I've got to be going.

Hey, how did the winner do it?

What did he do, spend a
lot of weekends with the kids

teaching them
basketball and stuff?

No, he just went
around talking to people.

You're jiving. Who is this dude?

Me.

And thanks for helping me win.

I couldn't have
done it without you.

Hey, you got any cake
to go with this ice cream?

Forget the cake. You're
going out to dinner with us.

Dinner!

Well, a-a-all right!

[♪♪♪]

ANNOUNCER: The Jeffersons was
videotaped in front of a studio audience.

♪ Movin', movin' on up... ♪
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