01x23 - Matriarchy

[bunniefuu]

Previously on
Brothers and Sisters:

- Your girl's healthy, she's doing well.
- Just the girl?

We've been having
some grown-up problems.

Did Daddy do something bad?

You're a soldier
and you have a job to do.

Your unit needs a good medic.

When you're over there,
they are your brothers and sisters.

Something bad happen to you
in Chicago?

Robert McCallister and his ilk are
kind of what's wrong with this country.

She fixed you up with my brother,
unbeknownst to both of us,

and apparently it did not go well.

William's spiked a fever.
He's gone into septic shock.

His organs are failing.
He doesn't have much time.

Oh, God!

I can't accept your proposal
until you accept mine.

Yes.

Hey.

What about that one?

Nah.

What about... this right here?
It's good.

- Hey.
- Hello.

Bro, I'm a recovering addict
who's going to Iraq in ten days.

That's my point exactly.
A m*llitary man, going off to w*r...

you could get some serious
sympathy action.

The last time I went surfing,
Dad was alive and Kitty was in New York.

Yeah. It's been
a long, complicated year.

You know, but we've had
some good times.

It's been a barrel of laughs.

How's Julia?

She's fine.

Tired, but she's fine.

Well...

...here we are again, little brother.

The waves are breakin'.

It's like what they say, life is
what happens in between big sets.

- Who says that?
- I have no idea.

- It sounded pretty poetic in my head.
- You are such a tool. Let's go.

b*at you, asshat.

Wow, that's a rock.

Sorry, I don't mean to stare.
It's... It's beautiful.

Everybody's staring.

This is the "meet the ring" dinner.

It was my grandmother's.
She left it to me.

So when's the engagement party.

- Yes!
- When is the engagement party?

Well, you know,
it's a really busy time, so I...

- She decided she didn't want one.
- I didn't decide I didn't.

I'm just not comfortable with...
I don't know.

Kitty, if you're holding back
on account of Julia and me, don't.

- Honestly, 'cause we're fine.
- I know, I know, and thanks.

You guys are being really great.
But I really, really don't want one.

You have to stop taking responsibility
for everyone else's feelings.

We're perfectly capable of taking care
of ourselves and we want a party.

- I don't want a party without Justin.
- He doesn't leave for ten days.

I could throw a wedding in that time.
We could have it next weekend.

- No!
- Yes.

- Wait, wait, you hear that?
- What?

- No.
- Party.

- No, I'm serious...
- Party, party!

- No, stop!
- Party, party, party, party!

Hi, honey.

Oh, sorry, I...

I didn't know you were asleep.

I didn't mean to be.

It's : ?

So... how'd it go tonight?

I didn't get very far on the nursery,
if that's what you mean.

Why don't we call my mom and ask her
to help with the nursery, all right?

I mean, she would be
more than happy to do that.

- You think so?
- You kidding me?

She lives for that kind of stuff.

I'm sorry, Tommy.
I'm trying, I'm really trying.

Don't apologize.

Just save your energy
for when the baby gets home, OK?

I just want her room to be pretty.

It will be.

I promise.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

The mattress is so squishy that
all the blood is rushing to my head.

That's funny 'cause
I'm not having that problem.

You know, when you move in,

you can bring any mattress you want.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God,
Robert, I'm moving in.

You didn't think I was gonna move in
with you and Nora, did you?

No. No, but I just didn't do the math.

Oh, God. Oh, my God,

how am I gonna tell my mother
that I'm moving out?

- Hello?
- Justin Walker?

Who's this?

This is Sgt. Horell from the Department
of Combat Medic Training.

I'm calling to confirm your arrival here
at Ft. Jackson on Sunday, May .

Sunday, this Sunday? I'm not
supposed to be there until the nd.

According to our files
you are to report for duty...

...on the th at .

There's got to be some sort of mistake.
I don't report to camp until Tuesday.

I have the orders right in front of me.

I can't be there on Sunday.

I have an important
family event to go to...

- Corporal Walker.
- You don't know my mother.

She'll k*ll me, you and the whole army.

You are legally bound
to appear on the th.

Look, please one more day.
They're throwing a party because of me.

I am sorry, son.

The party's over.

- Good morning.
- Have you seen this list?

Your darling fiancé has decided to
invite the entire state of California.

I really don't think he should be using
his engagement party to get votes.

Mom, he's only inviting his family.

Were the McCallisters part
of a breeding experiment?

Listen to this:

Major Wiener.

- Is that a joke?
- Don't laugh.

It's Robert's favorite uncle
and it's pronounced "whiner. "

Major Whiner?
I don't know which one's worse.

You and I really need to discuss
what's gonna happen next

- with you and me.
- Yes, yes, yes,

and I really want to do that.
But I think right now, honey,

we have to focus on the task at hand.

We'll gonna have to call these people.
No time to send out invitations.

I'll need numbers from the Senator...

You can call him Robert now, not
Senator, because we're getting married.

We're merging our lives.

Hi, Kitty. Hey, Nora.

Sorry. I'll be out of your way.
I'm just getting something to drink.

Actually I wanted to talk to you.

I want you to invite your mother
to Kitty's engagement party.

Oh. I don't know if that's a good idea.

I don't know if she'd want to go.

I don't think you heard me.
You're part of this family,

she's your mother, she's in business
with my son. Invite her.

- Will do.
- OK, good. Thanks.

Mom, do you remember the vineyard?
I don't want another pastry smackdown.

Oh, that tension is all settled now.

For the record I really want
this marriage to happen.

Kitty, you're getting married. Oh!

You know how long
I've been dreaming of this?

Mother and daughter,
under the same roof,

- planning for the most...
- About that one roof.

Roof.

We have to find a venue.

Sweet Mother of God,
how could I have forgotten?

I just couldn't tell her.

She's just got so much
to deal with right now.

Justin's going to Iraq.

I wouldn't worry about it.
The right moment will present itself.

Ten-hut!

Sorry, I forgot that
I'm no longer in the m*llitary.

I was just calming your fiancée down.

I know. I couldn't tell her.
She's overwhelmed.

Hey, Jas, why don't you help
Nora out with the party?

And the connection would be
gay person, brilliant party planner?

- Tell me I'm wrong.
- No. I'm glad to be of service.

Wow. How come I didn't get
a nice brother like that?

How come I got Larry, Moe and Curly?

- He's already met Moe.
- Yeah, sorry.

I don't know what I was thinking,
fixing you two up.

Sure. I just caught Kevin on a bad day.

No, he's always like that.

At least I'm marrying into
a nice, normal family, right?

I knew it! You're bogged down in
a quagmire of Nora overcommitment.

You know what?
"I told you so" is so ungracious.

And yes, I am feeling a bit overwhelmed.
Please just go look at the venue.

It's downtown, it's colorful,
it's Renaissancy.

Renaissancy?

Don't forget, be at my house by : .

Saul is leading a cold call session
to all the guests.

I can't come tonight.
I'm gonna see Wicked with Justin.

You're gonna see Wicked
for the fifth time? With Justin?

Sixth time. I know he hates musicals,

but after Wicked,
everything will change.

I didn't have to ask him,
he asked me. How about that?

Huh. Very interesting.

So I asked him to see Wicked, big deal.
He's gone on about this forever

like it's the Second Coming
or something.

But you hate musicals. You walked out
of Sound of Music when you were five.

I've talked to the others. You took
Tommy surfing the other day,

Sarah and the kids to the zoo.

You've asked me to go
to the museum tomorrow.

Are you gonna take Kitty
to the Reagan Library?

Why are you busting my chops, Mom?

Because I know what you're doing.

I'm not doing anything. I'm saying
goodbye to my family because I'm...

What? Finish the sentence.

Because I'm going to Iraq, Mom.

That's not what you're thinking.

You don't know what I'm thinking
or what I'm feeling, OK?

You know what? I'm not gonna go
to the museum with you tomorrow.

We'll go when you get back.

You wanted to go see
the Hockney exhibit. It won't be there.

Life's not permanent.
You of all people should know this.

Please don't be telling me
I can't say goodbye to my family.

That's not what you mean
when you say it,

and I won't stand for it.

Mom, I'm going to a place where people
are blown up on a daily basis.

There's a very real possibility
that I'm not gonna come back...

Stop! Stop it.

If you go there believing
something's going to happen to you

then something's going to happen.

What do you want me to do,
pretend I'm invincible?

I want you to know,
as deeply and surely as I do,

that you are coming home,

and that is the only thought
you should have in your head.

I don't know that, Mom.

Justin, you told me how you talked
to the soldiers on the b*ttlefield,

that you look in their eyes and promised
them they are going to live.

Why can't you give yourself
the same benefit of the doubt? Why?

Because I was lying, Mom.

Not all of them made it.

So, you can think
whatever you want,

but please do not tell me I can't take
my mother to a museum to say goodbye.

No, I'm not going to go.

I won't say goodbye.

It's OK.

The Bougainvillea Court can hold
up to people comfortably.

Yeah, it's definitely colorful...

Like the bougainvillea.
It's bright and pink.

You know what?
It's just a little antacid pink.

Your mother absolutely fell in love
with it on our virtual tour.

Really? Does the virtual tour
include a picture of the carpet?

Do you have a problem with my room?

It's not necessarily my taste.

Maybe you have bad taste.

If you're gonna insult me I can leave.
It's absolutely no problem for me.

What's the problem this time, Kevin?

He thinks I have bad taste.
What are you doing here?

I was told I'd be meeting your mother,

but looks like both sides
sent the gay scouts instead.

Excuse me, gentlemen,
I hate to interrupt...

Sorry. This is not what I had in mind
for my sister's engagement party.

The Bougainvillea Court is famous
for its character and texture.

If by character and texture you mean
cockroaches and columns

you're on the money. Come on,
you hate this as much as I do.

It's like the first minutes
of Extreme Home Makeover,

- before they tear the house down.
- Consider your contract null and void.

Great, genius. Now what?

Are you still trying to sabotage
this relationship?

No, I just wasn't feeling...

I'm a lawyer,
I'll get your deposit back.

I want you to call the man
and beg him to let us...

- No. Mom!
- It's perfect.

I'm not calling that person.
Wait a minute...

OK, we found the perfect place

and it's free, it's available
and it's very homey.

Oh, no, no... We are not doing it here.

Why not? We've had such
amazing times here.

Look, it'll be meaningful, intimate...

Intimate? We have a hundred guests.

. I just got the senator's
updated list.

Which is why we rented a tent.

Know what a tent
will do to my grass?

We'll have to rent tables, chairs,
plates... You're not using my dishes.

We've taken care of everything.
We hired a valet, confirmed a caterer.

Who is this "we"?

Jason McCallister and I, my future...

...whatever-in-law.
- The senator's brother.

- He hates you.
- He doesn't hate me.

- Oh, no, he hates you.
- He does not hate me.

It's a secret crush turned inside-out.

Anyway, we both share
the gay party-planning gene

so all you have to do is relax.

All right.
Saul, I forgot to tell you,

Milo Peterman's coming.

- He is?
- He called me the other day.

He asked about you, about the kids.

I told him
I didn't have time to explain

and why not come
and find out for himself?

- He does not belong at this party.
- Who's Milo Peterman?

An old friend of Saul's. Why?
What's one more at this point?

Two more if he brings
that bitch wife Elaine.

He's not bringing Elaine.
They got a divorce.

- They did?
- Yes.

- Hi.
- Hey.

Hi.

Mom, I've decided that I don't think
I should be the primary toaster.

No, come on, I'm always the one talking
and quite frankly I'm sick of me.

- Let's give someone else a chance.
- There's a new one.

Shut up, dirtbag!

You speak beautifully.

But, Mom, it's a little weird, isn't it?

Me giving a toast about marriage,
given my current situation.

I just... It feels like bad luck.

- Hey, guys.
- Pizza!

Mom, Julia's not coming to the party.

All right! I want you all to leave

until you have something
positive to tell me.

- We're going to see Wicked.
- Yay!

- It's not enough you're going to Iraq?
- You're next, Tommy.

- No.
- Bye, all.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Tommy, can't you
convince Julia to come?

You could encourage her.
I think it would be good for her

- to get out, be with family.
- Mom...

- All right, OK, I'm packing.
- Hey. So my mom's a yes.

- Holly's coming?
- Sarah, get over it.

- We've all moved on.
- Easy for you to say.

I haven't had the chance to hurl food
at her. No offense, Rebecca.

None taken. Hey, Saul.

I just don't see why I should have to
see her at my sister's engagement party.

If it means that much to you, Sarah,
you'd make the speech.

All right, hey, I'm here,
ready to start rolling some calls.

OK, here goes. Everybody
gets a list of people to call.

As soon as you get a response
you let me know

and then I record it
on the big board over here.

And it's not downtown, by the way.
We're having the party here.

- What?
- It's here?

- Mom?
- It actually makes it convenient

because this way we can tell them
to send the presents here.

Oh. Oh, you know, have them
send the presents to Robert's address

since I'm gonna be moving out soon.

You're moving out?

Yeah.

Oh, Mom, come on,
what did you think?

Did you think Robert
was gonna move in here?

Frankly, I hadn't
thought about it at all.

I've been so preoccupied

with the , things I've been
doing for your engagement party.

Right. The party I didn't even want.

Sweetie, you didn't talk to me
for three months

because I didn't throw you
the sweet party

you insisted on not having.

Mom, that's different. I was .

Everybody wants a sweet party.

Well, if you feel you're ready
to move out then...

Ready? Why wouldn't I be ready?

Of course you're ready and I will
miss your company terribly,

but you're a little old
to be living with your mother.

Why do you have to insult me?

Why don't you just tell me
you're gonna miss me?

Why can't you say
you're scared to move out?

Why make me into this clingy, neurotic
mother trying to force you to stay?

It's like the Passive-Aggressive
Olympics.

- Shut up, Sarah!
- All of you, stop this!

Just stop it, it's not fair.
I don't care if she moves out.

I just resent the way she comes in here
and blithely announces it.

I have been trying to tell you
for three days.

But you don't want to think about it,
just like thinking about Justin leaving.

Don't you dare
bring your brother into this!

I didn't want a party!

We should be spending this time
with Justin,

not spending our time
calling , people.

- Then fine, don't help. Just go.
- Fine, I will.

- I'm gonna start packing.
- Good!

- I'm not kidding.
- Neither am I.

Thank God! Thank God
I'm getting out of this prison!

Don't let the door hit you
on your way out, sweetie.

Wow.

That was amazing.

No! They're all symmetrical.

- Leave them for the guests.
- I'm not a guest, Mom?

You live here, don't you?

Let the man eat quiche.
He's leaving Tuesday.

- It's Tuesday, right?
- Yeah, Tuesday. Mom.

- That happened.
- You!

Jason, what you and Kevin
pulled off is amazing.

An absolute triumph. Almost worth
the sacrifice of my lawn.

Oh, Mother, enough about the grass.

Know what I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna get you a truckload of sod
as a moving-out present.

What she is trying to say is thank you
for opening up your house.

Oh, well, you're welcome.

- Just hope it's gonna be OK.
- Well, why wouldn't it be?

Look, I don't want to make this
into something it's not,

but it's about my family.

They are...

They're just... You know, they're...

Hello.

Nora Walker. Hey-hut!

You must be Major Wiener.

You were gonna say wiener.
Everybody says wiener. It's OK.

- Give us a hug.
- Hey!

- OK, there. Uncle Jack.
- Hey, Bobby, Bobby!

My favorite nephew. Look at this guy.

Can you believe that this little bastard
could be president?

He used to follow me around
all the time.

I used to bite his butt
when he was little.

- We used to call him Little Wiener...
- So you've met Nora.

- And this is Kitty, my fiancée.
- Kitty.

Hi, Major Wiener.

Call me Jack. Kitty.

You ready, you ready?
Don't move, don't move.

- Guess what I got in here?
- I don't want to guess.

- Look! There it is.
- A button.

I don't think we needed to do
the button thing.

Don't be modest. I brought a whole bag.

- The party's out back.
- Oh, no, it's not.

The party's right here, Nora. Come on.
We're gonna have a drink.

Tell the family to meet me
at the bar.

- Good.
- You're still gonna marry me?

Yeah, yeah, I mean, come on,
so you have a crazy uncle.

Hey, Robbie!

Cousin Margaret! How you doing?

You missed a great pub crawl.
Hey, where's the can?

The can? Oh, the bathroom.

The bathroom
is right down that hallway.

- Thanks.
- Hey!

Good to see you, man. How are you?

Whoa, hey! OK, OK now.

- I'll see you back in the tent.
- See you out there.

You can take the food...
Food goes back into the kitchen.

- Hi. Hi, Robbie.
- Hi.

Taste this. It's delicious.
Make sure I get that glass back.

I'm sorry, excuse me, not upstairs.

Saul.

- Saul!
- Milo?

- Hey. How are you?
- How are you?

Good, good. Yeah.

You seem shocked.
Didn't Nora tell you I was coming?

Of course she told me.
Come on, Milo, it's been years.

- Nearly .
- You look great.

I feel great. I still feel sometimes,
then I look in the mirror.

No, no, you can't do that.
I haven't done that for years.

I'm sorry that we lost touch.

I still think about our trip
to the Keys.

Someone told me that your daughter
became a pediatrician.

Yep. The other one's an architect.

Wow, an architect. That's amazing.
Boy, they grow fast.

What about Elaine? How is she?

We divorced about a year ago.

- I'm sorry.
- No, no, don't be.

It's the right thing to do.
How about you? Still a bachelor?

Oh, yeah. Some things never change.

Anyway,
I was on my way to the kitchen

to get the caterer to bring out
more of those mushroom quiches...

Saul, don't you want to know
why I left Elaine?

Well, I...

I'm not pretending anymore. I'm gay.

A little late to be coming out
of the closet, I know.

Pointless, some would say,

but I've always been a late bloomer.

It's wonderful for you.

It's very brave, what you've done.

I'm gonna go to the kitchen
and get those mushroom things.

- Catch up with you later.
- Yep.

- Cooper, I've been looking ev...
- Shh!

Gotcha!

I'm gonna get you!

Come on, Cooper, I'm sure Mrs. Harper
has more important things to do

than lurk behind stuff.
Coop, come on.

There's chocolate brownies
in the kitchen.

You might want to hurry
or they're all gone.

I'm sorry, I hope you didn't
feel obligated to...

No, no, it was fun.

Holly, can I ask you something?

How do actors memorize their lines
so quickly?

I have to do a speech
for the happy couple.

Oh, yeah. That's always fun.

Yeah. I haven't written it yet.

I always dreaded weddings.

You can imagine sitting
at the singles table,

and as far as anyone else was concerned
that's what I was, single.

- Why keep putting yourself through it?
- I don't know.

There's always something
so magical about weddings.

These two people
willing to take a chance

in front of everyone that they know.

It's incredibly naive...

...but at the same time
incredibly hopeful.

Maybe you should do the speech.

No, you'll be fine.

So why are you being so nice?

Well, I feel that we have more in common
than we're willing to acknowledge.

And I'm tired of hating you
and of you hating me.

What are you doing?

Looking for a Band-Aid.
One of my cousins cut himself.

That doesn't surprise me. I'm shocked
half of them made it to adulthood.

You think we're so beneath you,
don't you?

I think you're all insane,
yeah, and drunk.

Yeah? What's that,
like, your fourth margarita?

Why don't you just
carry around a pitcher?

Well, at least I'm not stealing
the flower arrangements.

OK, for the record,

you're allowed to take the flower
arrangements home at a party.

Mmm. Usually when the party's over.

One of your cousin's minivans
looks like a florist's truck.

Your Uncle Saul practically tackled
my Aunt Phyllis.

He was trying to stop her
from replacing the shellfish tower

- with an artichoke mold.
- It's an artichoke ambrosia.

Ohh.

- Why are you so unpleasant?
- What do you care?

- I don't.
- You weren't looking for a Band-Aid.

You came in here looking for me.

Maybe.

Tommy, you don't know how
to make a Screaming Orgasm?

Nope. I have a feeling you're gonna
teach me, Cousin Catherine.

Sorry about my family.

You never have to apologize for family.

Besides, it's refreshing to be
the tame ones for a change.

You're still mad at Kitty, aren't you?

I'm mad at everybody and everybody's
mad at me too, I guess.

It's one of the first things
they tell you in politics.

You can't please everybody.

I'll talk to Kitty. There's no reason
you should be fighting today.

Oh, it's not Kitty.

I'm glad she's moving out,
moving in with you.

- Wait a minute, you're glad?
- Mm-hmm.

OK, it's official.
All Walker women are confusing.

I'm just taking it out on her.
I do that sometimes.

I know Kitty's gonna be nearby,
but Justin isn't.

He wants to spend the day with me
to say goodbye, and I'm not gonna do it.

It's hard to be the one leaving, too.

I was serving in the first Gulf w*r
when my father d*ed.

It was just bad luck,
the way it happened.

My point is that I didn't get
to say goodbye.

Things happen in w*r, Nora.

If your son wants to say goodbye
I think you should let him.

- Family, fall in! It's the party train!
- Whoo!

Uncle Jack!

- Nora, baby!
- No, no, no, no.

Climb aboard the love train! Go!

You know... Keep your hands
off the caboose.

- Oh, my God in Heaven.
- A Walker engine!

Choo-choo-choo!

Do you still think I'm electable?

Probably not.

Lead the love train! Pick it up.

I don't remember this song
being this long.

Oh, my God, is that man vomiting?

Cousin Larry, weak stomach.

Oh, my God!

Perfect.

Hey. What are you doing here?

Oh, sorry, just taking
a little breather.

What's the matter?
The tent hit you in the head?

No. Just don't feel very
comfortable being here today.

Tell me this doesn't have to do
with the Joe and Sarah thing.

I practically broke up their marriage.

Now I'm at your other sister's
engagement party. It's bizarre.

First, Joe and Sarah were heading down
that road before you showed up.

Secondly, how many times
do we have to tell you, Rebecca?

You're part of the family now.

If you knew everything
about me, Justin...

What does that mean?

Joe wasn't the only older man.

OK.

There was somebody else.

He was a teacher.

He had a family.

So how old were you?

Sixteen.

Yeah.

Eventually his wife found out,

and everyone told my mom
to press charges

but I begged her not to,
so she didn't.

And Evan, the guy,
moved his family up to Chicago.

I thought I could let it go.

I did, but then he called to apologize

and... hopped on a bus.

I went up there.

I never went to school there, Justin.

He put me up in a hotel
so we could, you know...

And then a month later
his wife found out again.

And...

...he k*lled himself.

Wow.

I'm sorry, Rebecca.

Yeah.

So, why don't you just ask me?

Ask you what?

If I had something to do with that kiss.

Did you?

Yeah. I don't know what I was thinking.

I certainly don't know what Joe
was thinking in that moment...

You need to tell Sarah, OK?

Not just for her but for you, too.

Will you come with me?

I can't.

I'm leaving tonight.

That's why I came up here,
to get my uniform and...

No one knows downstairs.

You weren't gonna say goodbye?

I don't want to ruin anything
this time.

- Did you think you could just leave?
- It'll be easier on everyone, OK?

I'm gonna miss you, Justin.

I'm gonna miss you too.

Hey, everyone. Hey.

I'm Sarah, Kitty's sister.

I think that tent coming down was
a sign you can't control everything,

which is kind of apropos
an engagement party.

Talk about stepping
into the great unknown.

Two people who happen
to love each other

are suddenly gonna transform themselves
into something totally different:

A family.

A family, God.

It's the best and the worst thing
that can ever happen to us.

A lot of the times
we want to k*ll each other.

OK, most of the time.

But the truth is
that without each other,

we would be truly lost.

So I would like to propose a toast
to families,

to what an amazing and rare thing it is

to be part of one
so large and wonderful.

To my sister...

...who I love completely and totally.

And to Robert, and everyone
that you bring to the table.

So to our new family,

that is bigger and better and greater

- than the sum of its parts.
- Hear hear.

Salut!

Sarah, thank you.
That was just beautiful.

I thought I'd spare you all
hearing another speech from me.

So I've asked my brother Jason
to lead us in a blessing.

Absolutely.

If you would all
bow your heads with me.

Lord, behold our family
here assembled.

For the peace
accorded to us this day...

Kevin!

Of all the situations
you've ever put me in...

- He's a minister?
- Yes, he's a minister.

- Have you never met a minister before?
- I've never sucked face with one.

- You did not. You did not!
- Yeah.

You sucked face with him?
Kevin, that's great.

Kitty, how could you not
have told me about this?

Because I didn't know, Kevin.
I didn't, I swear to God.

You know what? You're the worst
"communications director" ever.

If he wins the election you're gonna be
the first First Lady to be impeached.

And we thank you for this
beautiful place in which we dwell,

for the love that unites us,

for our friends
in all parts of the earth.

Amen.

Mom, what are you doing in here?

Resting.

I'm trying to not think
about that tent collapsing

as a metaphor for my life.

You know, Mom,

sometimes a tent... is just a tent.

Look, I'm...

I'm sorry I'm moving out

and I'm so sorry
for the way I told you.

No, there's no reason to apologize,
none whatsoever.

It's my job. It's what mothers do.

All the people I love come here

on their way to and from
the big moments of their lives.

It's like, uh...

I don't know, what do they call
a safe place where you go to rest

and recover and get stronger?

- A spa?
- No.

No, a sanctuary.

Yeah, they call it a sanctuary.

Well, with the year we've had,

you can understand how I was just
trying to hold onto it a little longer.

And now you're both
moving out at once.

And it's a hard one.

Oh, Mom.

Thank you for letting me stay.

It's... It's been an awful year

but it's been the best
awful year of my life.

Oh... I'm sorry,
I don't mean to interrupt.

- Is something wrong?
- I promised I wouldn't say anything,

but...

...the Army pushed Justin's
report date up.

- He has to go back early.
- What?

He didn't want to spoil your party...

- Where he is now?
- He's at the airport.

Oh, my God, Kitty,
we have to go find him.

- We will.
- We have to find him now.

- Excuse us, excuse us.
- Excuse me, excuse us.

Excuse us, pardon me. Pardon me.

- Excuse us...
- I need to see your ticket and ID.

We don't have a ticket.
We're here to say goodbye to someone.

You can't pass through
without a ticket.

- OK, let's go buy a ticket.
- We don't have time.

Please, please, ma'am,
it's my son Justin.

- He's being shipped off to Iraq...
- I'm sorry, I wish I could help you.

Government rules.
I need to see your ticket, please,

and identification.

Yes. We have a line here, ladies.
Thank you.

I tried his cell phone again
and it's his voicemail.

Justin, this is your mother.

I'm so angry at you.

How could you go off
without saying goodbye?

I'm sorry I didn't go
to the museum with you.

It was so sweet of you to think
of something I wanted to do,

and it's just like you
thinking of everybody else.

You have to stop that, you hear me?
I want you to stop that right now.

You guys are unbelievable.

Come here.

Justin.

Good thing I was in the bathroom
changing into this.

Kitty, I'm sorry,
I didn't want to ruin your party.

Justin, you are such an idiot!

I mean, here we go again, right?

You know, I don't... I don't know
what I believe in anymore...

...but I know that I believe in you.

And I love you so much.

I love you too.

- Take care of yourself.
- I will. OK.

Come here, Mom. Come here.

I'm going to be OK.

Yeah.

Justin, you don't have to say anything
or do anything for me.

I came to say goodbye.

I love you, Mom.

I love you too.

And I'm going to be just as brave
as you are. I promise.

I'm gonna miss my flight.

I love you. Love you, love you.

All right, ticketed passengers,

we've got a soldier here going off to
fight for his country. Make some room.

Right this way, sir.

Hey. Look, you weren't kidding
back there, were you?

It wasn't some kind of party trick,
was it?

No. I'm a Methodist minister.

We were raised Catholic

but I needed a friendlier audience,

- let's put it that way.
- Right.

Kevin, I wasn't hiding anything.
It just never came up.

Sure. So...

So do you have a congregation?

Yeah. Downtown.

Great. But you're not Republican,
though, are you?

No, no, but I'd vote for my brother.

That's nothing.
My sister's about to marry him.

I think our families
deserve each other.

You know, I... My offices are downtown.

Maybe... We should have
lunch sometime.

Look, Kevin,

I'm a very traditional person.

Jumping your bones
was extremely atypical for me.

I could use some tradition in my life.

Saul, I'm gonna be going.

It's wonderful seeing you again.

You too, Milo.

I bought a little house
in Nichols Canyon.

I'd love it if you'd come up
for lunch, dinner.

The truth is, Milo, I'm pretty busy
these days and I...

Sauly, we're too old for excuses.

I've missed you.

Call me.

Whoo!

Tequila!

Bombs away!

Wait. Be careful.

Dear God in Heaven.

Mom, what happened?

What happened here? I thought
you were manning the house.

We tried, but there's too many of them.

I stopped two guys
peeing in your pansies.

- Did you catch him?
- Yes, just barely.

- Mom, are you OK?
- Yeah.

- Nora, how's Justin?
- Fine.

- Oh, Mom...
- No, don't start, don't start.

I had the whole waterworks in the car.
I can't cry anymore.

I've got the whole cast of
Animal House here to distract me.

- Good luck with the new family.
- Come on, like we're not a little nuts.

But they took it to a whole new level.

Nora, I'm gonna give you a check
today for all this damage.

Don't worry about it. What with
everything we've been through

what's a little property damage?

At least your family knows
how to have a good time.

Look at us, sitting around here
like a bunch of party poopers.

How could we possibly compete
with the McCrazies?

Walkers, have a sh*t! Come on!

You guys don't want to be wallflowers.

Oh, Jack!

Last one in the pool is a...

...major weenie!

- Come on, Mom.
- She's not serious?

- She's serious.
- Mom!

Oh, she is!

- What's going on?
- Pool party.

I'm just gonna
take my jacket off first.

- You up for it, Mom?
- Why the hell not?

Are you coming or are the Walkers
just a little too much for you?

No, Kitty, I'm a United States
Senator, please.

# O-o-h child
things are gonna get easier

# O-o-h child
things'll get brighter

# Someday we'll get it together
and we'll get it undone

# Someday when the world
is much brighter

# Someday we'll walk together
in a beautiful sun