07x33 - Lexi Gets Stiffed

[bunniefuu]

TERRY: Ah, start it!
Sarah, right here, right here.

- Okay!
- Woo-hoo!

Whoa. Oh. You okay?

(whoops)

- (laughing)
- All right?

Man, that thing
hit you in the eye?

Oh...

The hell. Unnecessary roughness.

Actually, that's
a football term.

In basketball, it's
called charging.

Okay, you charged me.

Maybe we should just play horse.

Okay. If Megan's
not up to a real game.

Okay.

Uh...

It's your-your ball.

It's your ball.

No, look, I think
it's his ball, okay?

Look, I'm not very good at
playing these games, and, uh...

I have a feeling I'm just
getting in the way here.

So I'll see you at home, okay?

- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine. You go get 'em.

- Megan, why are you so upset?
- No. I'm fine.

Just leave me alone, okay?

(grunts, laughing)

Well.

She can't take the heat.

If we're gonna play, let's play.

You said you only had an hour.

- All right, me against you guys.
- Okay!

Go get him, Sarah!

Go get him!

(whoops)

Good!

- (door opens)
- EVE: Peter?

Peter?

What are you doing?

This marriage is over.

I talked to an attorney;
he's drawing the papers up.

I don't understand.
W-What happened?

The last time we talked,
we were gonna have dinner.

- We worked everything out.
- Well, we didn't.

You couldn't wait to
get me out of the way

so you could sleep with Tony.

Well, you got your wish, honey,

- I'm out of the way for good.
- You got it all wrong.

It was Amanda.

Amanda wanted
you out of the way.

She was... she was so desperate
to land Tony's damn account,

give him whatever he wanted.

He wanted you!

But I didn't want him!

That wasn't even
an issue for Amanda.

She set you up.

She made sure that you
missed the launch back to the ship

so Tony could be alone with me.

She pimped me, Peter.

She wanted me to
sleep with that bastard.

Like I would ever
be unfaithful to you.

I love you.

You're the most important
thing in the world to me.

You've got to
believe that, Peter.

- Eve...
- Please, Peter...

Let me show you
how much I love you.

Hey.

Ooh. Are you sure you don't
want a doctor to look at your eye?

No, there's no time.

The film for the cruise line
commercial that Amanda sh*t

just arrived by
phantom messenger.

She's waiting for us
in the screening room.

- You're late. Sit down.
- Welcome back.

AMANDA: Start the dailies.

What the hell am I looking at?

RYAN: Maybe there was
a problem with the transfer.

PROJECTIONIST: Looks to
me like the film was exposed

- to an airport X-Ray machine.
- All of it?

PROJECTIONIST: The lab
should've said something.

Yeah, it's ruined.

Well, this is your fault.

Look, Amanda, I'm
sorry about the film,

but I was only responsible
for picking it up at the airport.

If the film was damaged
in an X-Ray machine,

it must have happened in
Mexico, it wasn't Megan's fault.

You're still working
for Lexi, aren't you?

You're out of line, Amanda.
You owe Megan an apology.

Like hell I do!
Don't you get it?

I sunk $ million
into that commercial.

The agency's future, my future,

and I don't have a
damn thing to show for it.

It's over. I'm ruined.

(sighs)

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪ I feel very good today ♪

♪ Inside your lovin' ♪

♪ I feel something that I know ♪

♪ I can't deny ♪

♪ I feel ready now ♪

♪ I'm through with
all the wonderin' ♪

♪ I see the promise of
forever in your eyes ♪

♪ Here's the moment ♪

♪ Here's the chance ♪

♪ Fools rush out ♪

♪ Where wise men dance ♪

♪ Now I know the life we
lead adds up to something ♪

♪ Bigger 'cause the two of us ♪

♪ Are stronger than the tide ♪

♪ Now I know the life we
lead adds up to something ♪

♪ Finally I know we'll be ♪

♪ We'll be all right ♪

♪ We'll be all right ♪

♪ I've got nothing on my mind ♪

♪ But your lovin' ♪

♪ I've got nothing
left to hide ♪

♪ From my heart ♪

♪ I've got music now to sing ♪

♪ That I believe in ♪

♪ And there's nowhere... ♪

(tires squeal)

What the hell are you doing?

You tricked me into
having sex with you.

You manipulated me

and Eve so you could
land some stupid account.

You know, this has
been a lousy day,

and I'm in no mood
for this conversation.

Besides, it wasn't
that black and white.

My feelings for you are sincere.

Oh, that's the biggest
line of crap I've ever heard.

You care about one person,
Amanda, and that's you.

No wonder Kyle left you.

I'm sorry I ever met you.

I'm even sorrier
I ever loved you.

Hey, I didn't know
you were back in town.

Well, I am, and I'm very busy.

Can you send a bottle of
Chardonnay over to my table?

Yeah, sure, whatever
the customer wants.

Hi.

Before you say anything, I
know you're upset with Eve.

I don't want to talk about Eve.

Right. Then we'll talk
about the commercial.

I hate to admit it, but I
really misjudged Eve's talent.

She's no actress.

I-I saw the dailies,
and she's God-awful.

So I-I had the film destroyed.

But I'm still high
on the concept,

and I believe with
the right talent...

Let me guess where
you're going with this.

You want me to
finance a reshoot.

- Well, I was hoping...
- The answer's no.

Well, you can't
expect me to shell out

another million of my own money.

You don't have another million.
You just blew your whole wad.

And I'd like you to move out
of my townhouse by tonight.

I'm through with
you and your agency.

LEXI: Hello, Amanda.

Hi, Tony.

Hi.

I didn't know you
two knew each other.

Well, how well do you
have to know someone

to have lunch with them?

And I believe you're
sitting in my seat.

This is a joke, right?

LEXI: Amanda, don't you
have some packing to do?

And don't think
about moving back in,

because I don't rent to losers.

Tony, maybe we should
go someplace else.

- Great idea.
- Yeah.

Have a nice day, Amanda.

So.

You still want me
to open the bottle?

Good morning, Mrs. Burns.

What the hell are
you doing here?

Selling Christmas trees in May?

My husband knows all about
me now, all about my past,

- the time I did.
- Whoa, whoa, lady.

I-I'm not here 'cause of you.

I'm here to start
my life over again.

I mean, I got me a steady
job with the L.A. Patrol, it's...

Sure you did.

Bet you that uniform's a fake.

(laughs) Wrong game.

You know, my experience as
a prison guard finally paid off.

My supervisor likes
it that I know how to...

use a g*n.

Well, then, congratulations.

Oh, i-if you see me,
um, or a little light

shining through your bedroom
window tonight, that'd be me.

Keeping an eye on you.

A-And that doctor
husband of yours.

I'm warning you.

Keep your distance.

Or you'll be sorry.

(wheezing laughter)

I'm not dumb! You don't
have to tell me twice.

I-I don't want that
Mr. Macho friend of yours

coming after me again.

Missed you at dinner tonight.

How's the eye?

It's a little, uh...

- black and blue.
- Oh.

I thought I'd play it safe and
let the family alone tonight.

Besides, I, uh, wanted to finish
writing my resignation letter.

What, you're quitting?

Yeah, why not?

(sniffs)

Amanda's going to fire
me in the morning anyway.

You don't make a mistake
around here and get off scot free.

RYAN: Uh, well...

let me talk to her.

(sniffs)

You know what?

I wish you were as eager
to stand up for me with Terry.

Come on. Terry was just
showing off today, okay?

Miss Super Jock.

She didn't mean anything by it.

What, do you
always play basketball

with your eyes closed?

The woman likes you. A lot.

Terry has always hated me, okay?

Besides, I love you.

And more than anything,
I want you in my life.

You, me, and Sarah.

I thought that's
what you wanted, too.

It doesn't matter what I want.

What matters is what Terry
wants, and she wants you.

You know, I can't believe
after all we've been through

you're going to doubt
my feelings for you.

You know what I think
this is? This is your problem.

And you're using this whole
Terry thing as an excuse

to run away from
our relationship.

I'm not only quitting
this job, okay?

I am moving out of the building.

Oh, great, just walk away.

That's real mature.

You know what? At
least I'm not a fool.

At least I can see
through Miss Super Jock.

AMANDA: Peter...

I said what I had to say.

And-and almost everything
that you said was true.

I did set up Eve,

and I even arranged for
you to miss the launch.

What I didn't manipulate

was the time that we
spent on that island.

I swear, I never meant
to sleep with you.

One thing led to another.

The sex was for real.

You know, you could push me away

you can pretend
it didn't happen,

but you know what we
shared, and you know that

we have never felt
this way with anyone.

I have never stopped loving you.

I still love you.

I love you.

I've always, always loved you.

Always.

I love you.

(water running)

- Oh! Ryan.
- Oh. Uh...

Oh.

I-I had no idea
you were in here.

I'm-I'm sorry.

Oh, well, I was just
returning your robe.

Yeah.

Well, if you're done
with the bathroom,

then I'll go get dressed.

Yeah. Yeah, it's all yours.

♪ Champagne me ♪

♪ Show me you love me ♪

♪ Kid glove me ♪

♪ Best way to cheer me ♪

♪ Pop me a cork ♪

♪ French me a fry... ♪

Room for two in there?

Get out.

- Hey!
- I'm rehearsing.

- What are you rehearsing?
- A pitch meeting.

What are you pitching?

Myself.

To Tony Marlin.

I'm gonna land his
cruise line account.

Well, I'm glad
you're singing to him

and you're not
sleeping with him.

Oh, no, I plan on
sleeping with him.

The pitch is tomorrow
night at his place.

I'm gonna put on a little show.

How come I don't get a show?

Because you're not a billionaire

and I don't want
anything from you.

W-Wait a second. You
know, this is a first for me,

taking a backseat
in a relationship.

I mean, shouldn't we
be concentrating on me?

Shouldn't we be talking
about our feelings?

- Hmm?
- Mm. The answer is still no.

This account is too important.

Go take a shower
in your own place.

You know what?

I don't even like your
shower. It has mildew.

♪ Send out for scotch ♪

♪ Boil me a crab... ♪

Hey. You wanted to see me?

Yeah, I was wondering
how much money is left

in the agency's cash account.

Um, ballpark, $ , .

Should be enough to cover
payroll for the next two weeks,

and I've talked to everyone.

We're gonna all start hustling
up some more business.

That won't be necessary.

I want you to take that $ ,

and divide it equally
among the staff.

What are you saying?

I'm closing the agency.

Amanda, I know losing the
Marlin account was a big blow,

but you can rebuild.

I mean, you got a lot of loyal
people out in that bullpen.

No, I'm not interested.

I want out.

You sure about this?

I have never been
more sure in my life.

And I don't think anyone will
have a problem finding a job.

They can just call Lexi.

She'll probably
throw in a raise,

just to twist the
Kn*fe a little deeper.

I'll talk to Accounting and have
them start allocating the cash.

AMANDA: Ryan...

(sighs)

You've been a great right hand.

Better than great.

Ah, I could get used to this.

- Staying in bed all morning...
- Mm-hmm.

Spending the
afternoons with you.

Unfortunately, reality
has to set in sometime.

Mm, no.

Hey.

- Hey there, bro.
- Hi, Ryan.

Hey, sorry to interrupt
your, uh, meal.

I went by the construction site.

The guy said you'd
be out here working.

Well, I would
hardly call this work.

(laughs): I'll second that.

I'll just leave you
two lovebirds alone.

You should go talk to him.

Hey, Ryan.

Wait up.

You came all the way out
here. There must be a reason.

I just thought
you'd want to know

Amanda's closing the agency.

She lost the cruise
line account...

Hell, she lost everything.

Well, that's too bad, but
that's Amanda's problem.

There's nothing
I can do about it.

Right. Well, I just thought
maybe she could use a friend.

She's got a lot of friends,
and don't worry about Amanda.

She'll bounce back.

She always has, she always will.

You're probably right.

You okay?

Yeah, I'll be fine.

We still on for dinner?

- Yeah.
- Cool.

See you later.

TERRY: And I can't believe

how much I love L.A.

I mean, I always
thought of myself

as an East Coast girl, you know?

But now, after a week
in sunny California...

I mean, I can really see
myself making a life out here.

At least you won't have to
shovel the driveway anymore.

Dad, the priests
always shovel the snow.

Well, then, she won't have
to buy any more winter coats.

She could sure
use a robe, though.

So, is the warm weather the
only thing keeping you here?

Uh, no, actually, you know,

the one thing I
really like about

being here in L.A. is
spending time with Ryan.

And you, too, of course, Kyle.

- (laughs)
- Yeah, yeah.

It's nice being a family
again, isn't it, Sarah?

Yep.

Especially since Uncle
Kyle lives at the beach.

He's gonna teach me how to surf.

Well, we still have
to talk about that.

I have to use the restroom.

TERRY: Okay, I'll go with you.

Excuse us.

KYLE: Um...

Is, uh, is Terry hitting on me?

Mm, let me think,

she's a beautiful woman
with a kid, your kid.

She wants to move out here,

and every time she looks
at you, I get the feeling

that she wants to
jump your bones.

So... yeah, I'd say
she's hot for you.

Great.

Um, I will be right back.

Your wife's on her
way down, Dr. Burns.

Oh, thank you.

- Meeting Eve?
- Yeah.

Yeah, we're gonna
have a little dinner tonight.

You don't sound
too happy about it.

Really?

Well, it's been a tough
week at the hospital.

Yeah, it's been a rough
week for everybody.

I guess you heard
Amanda's closing her agency?

No.

No, I didn't.

When did that happen?

This morning, according to Ryan.

Look, I-I don't have anything
that I can offer Amanda,

but you guys were friends,

you're still close,
you got money.

I thought maybe
you could bail her out.

Yeah, I'll do what I can, sure.

- Hi.
- Hi, honey.

- Hey.
- Hope you weren't waiting long.

Uh, no, we're just talking.

Yeah, I got to get
back to my table, okay?

Enjoy your dinner.

- Listen, I...
- I was thinking that

we could make a night
out of this, you know?

Um... Go dancing afterwards?

I just got a page
from the hospital.

It might be an emergency.

My cell phone's in the car.

I'm gonna call them from
the payphone, all right?

- Okay.
- All right.

Some wine, please.

- Sure.
- Thanks.

(phone rings)

Hello?

Hey, it's Peter.

AMANDA: I can't talk
right now. I'm, um...

I'm at a business wake.

Why didn't you tell
me about your agency?

AMANDA: Because you're
already burdened with enough guilt

and I figured, why
burden you more?

Anyway, it's my problem.

I want to get together,
all right? We need to talk.

AMANDA: No can do, Petey.

My lease runs out at midnight

and I intend to stay
here until : .

- Hey, our table's ready.
- I'll be right there.

Oh, do you have to
go back to the hospital?

I'm-I'm sorry. It's
an emergency.

I'm sorry.

Don't wait up tonight, okay?

They already turned
off the electricity, huh?

Mm.

It's funny. After
all these years,

I think I like the bullpen
better in the dark.

Pull up a floor.

You're drunk.

Oh. I'm just numb.

You know, I got a lot of money.

You just say the word
and I'll write you a check out

for whatever you
need to save this place.

Trust me, it is
not worth saving.

Well, maybe not, but you are.

My life is falling apart.

I don't have my agency,
I don't have my building.

I don't even have
a place to live.

- You got me.
- Mm.

If Eve comes with the
package, I'm not interested.

It's not a package deal.

Do you love me?

Is that a trick question?

Answer me.

Yes.

I love you.

Well, I hope so.

I decided I'm
gonna split with Eve.

You're serious?

Yeah.

It's gonna be messy.

Every time I leave a
woman, she tries to k*ll me.

Oh, maybe she'll
push me off a bleacher.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.

I shouldn't, she's not a
cold-blooded m*rder*r.

Me, I'm just a...
hot-blooded drunk.

Okay.

Now that I've worn my
heart on my sleeve, um...

do you love me?

I'll take that as a yes.

You want some company for the
next two hours and minutes?

(gasps)

What are you doing?

Oh, your blanket
was on the floor.

I thought you might be cold.

Look, um, maybe,
uh, this is my fault.

Maybe I gave you
the wrong impression,

but, um, I don't
have feelings for you.

I-I like you, but...

There's Megan.

Yeah.

And, right, and I'm
totally in love with her.

(laughing): Ryan, I mean, all
I did was pick up your blanket.

If that's crossing the
line, then call me guilty.

I just want to be clear on this.

I'm perfectly clear.

It's Megan who seems
to have a problem.

I mean, I've been
trying to get to know her,

but she doesn't seem
interested in getting to know me.

Or Sarah, for that matter.

Now that's not true.

Look, it's only my opinion.

Megan may want you,
but she doesn't seem

to want what comes
along with you.

No, you don't know Megan, okay?

She's giving you and
me and Sarah space

- to get to know each other better.
- (sighs)

If I were Megan,
I'd make it a priority

to get to know my
boyfriend's family.

But that's just me.

You didn't have to take me
out to breakfast this morning.

Poor thing, you were at
the hospital until dawn.

You must be exhausted.

I've been doing
a lot of thinking,

and I think you should know...

that I care about you a lot.

Well, I hope so,
since we're married.

Actually, that's what I've been
thinking about, our marriage.

So have I.

You know, we really should
take that second honeymoon

we've been talking about.

The sooner the better, you know?

Uh, Hawaii or even Tahiti.

Maybe even a long
weekend in Carmel.

That would be
great, wouldn't it?

I'm not in love
with you anymore.

What?

You can have half of everything.

The money,
whatever you want. I...

I just don't want to be
in this marriage anymore.

- It's Amanda, isn't it?
- No.

No, this has nothing
to do with her.

This is about me, my feelings.

I don't know when it
happened, I just know that...

I just know that I'm
not in love with you.

And the longer I
stay in the marriage,

the more that I'll
wind up hurting you.

You just hurt me more
than anyone ever could.

I hate you and I hate Amanda!

No, I've been trying

to reach Amanda on
her cell phone all morning.

No, I can't. She must
have it turned off.

Did she get the money
to save her agency?

Oh, that's too bad.

No, I just, I'm
worried about her.

Look, Ryan, I'll call you later.

You've been trying to
get in touch with Amanda?

Yeah, I'm just trying
to find out if she's okay.

Mm. I should've known.

Every guy in Amanda's
life hangs on to her forever.

So, what are you gonna do
when you get ahold of her?

Offer her money? A-A warm
bed? A shoulder to cry on?

I'm just trying to
help out a friend.

I was married to her, still am.

Thanks for pointing that out.

Wait, Jane, I can't turn
my back on Amanda.

Just like you can't turn
your back on Michael.

No, I have turned my back.

I have only one rule for
a relationship these days

and it includes only two people.

No exes, no ex-lovers,
no ex-spouses, no excuses.

Well, I'm sorry, but I
can't give that to you.

We both have past
lives, we have past loves.

That's something
we're gonna have

to deal with realistically.

I thought this time with
you would be different,

but I guess it was
too good to last.

(door shuts)

♪ She's waiting
beside her window ♪

♪ He looks... ♪

I didn't see it coming.
I was blindsided.

I was rear-ended.
All of the above.

I mean, Lexi just blew in and
swept me off my feet, you know?

And I hadn't felt that in
a couple of marriages,

no offense to Jane.

Or Sydney, Kimberly, or Megan,

or Jane, again.

Look, I know.

The ones you don't
know, they're dead.

I didn't k*ll them. Not
the way Lexi's k*lling me.

I've never been
so head over heels!

You've got my condolences, pal.

You're only gonna
get your heart broken.

Oh, it's already breaking.

How would you feel if the woman
you were being intimate with

wanted to be intimate
with somebody else?

I can tell you
exactly how I'd feel.

I'd want to know, because
then I could hate him.

- You mean her.
- I mean him and her.

Oh.

Well, I can't hate Lexi.

I just think she's in
denial of her feelings.

Get past it, pal. Forget
her. Make her pay.

It's the only satisfaction
you're gonna get.

Oh, you know what I'm
talking about, don't you?

You've been there, right?

I'm there right now.

You seem very bitter.

See, I don't do bitter well.

Hey.

Maybe I could stop her?

(scoffs) You are
the eternal optimist.

What are you gonna do?

You gonna stop her every
day for the rest of her life?

Sure, if I have to.

Yeah.

(sighs)

MEGAN: Ryan?

- Yeah, hey.
- Are you up there?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Close
your eyes, close your eyes.

- Come on.
- Why do I have to close my eyes?

- Just, just come on.
- I'm on a ladder.

I know, I got you. Come on up.

- What are you doing?
- Come on...

(stammers anxiously)

You're okay. Oh!

What is going
on? I got your note.

- Why did you want me to meet you...?
- Okay.

You're wearing... Why
are you wearing a tux?

Have a seat.

What is going on?

Okay. You can
open your eyes now.

Oh. (laughs)

Look at this. Champagne,
flowers, candlelight.

Is that Michael Feinstein?

I was his stockbroker
in New York.

- Oh, my God.
- Ryan made me a bundle.

So, if I were you, I'd listen
to what the man has to say.

Megan, I'm sorry
I've been ignoring you.

I didn't mean to.

It's, well, my feelings
for you haven't changed.

Neither have mine.

Good, because having Sarah in
my life means nothing without you.

My life starts with you and
I want it to end with you.

(Feinstein singing indistinctly)

Megan, would you marry me?

You are the most
thoughtful, wonderful,

beautiful man I've
ever met in my life.

Is that a yes?

Yes.

Best part.

Oh, my...

(chuckles)

Oh, my God.

I love you so much.

Oh, I love you.

Did I mention how
beautiful you look?

Did I mention how nervous I am?

I've never actually given
a pitch without my staff,

my office, storyboards
and other visual aids.

Well, I like what
I've seen so far.

But what, uh, do you have
planned for me, exactly?

Uh, thank you.

I was gonna show
you just how sexy

I think your
commercial could be.

But you have to
use your imagination.

You have to envision someone
like me, almost as sexy,

like a younger Kathie
Lee, belting out a song.

Although, not the song
I'm gonna sing for you now,

but, uh, a theme song
for your cruise line.

I'm confusing
you here, aren't I?

No, I'm the audience
and you're the show.

I think I get it.

And the way you're dressed?

I'm already inclined to
love your performance.

God, I just love a man
who appreciates the arts.

My philosophy of
advertising is simple.

You just have to give the
audience what they want.

(soft, jazzy music plays)

And then some.

♪ Peel me a grape ♪

♪ Crush me some ice ♪

♪ Skin me a peach ♪

♪ Save the fuzz for my pillow ♪

♪ Talk to me nice,
talk to me nice ♪

♪ You've got to wine me ♪

♪ And dine me ♪

♪ Don't try to fool me ♪

♪ Bejewel me ♪

♪ Either amuse me ♪

♪ Or lose me ♪

♪ I'm getting hungry ♪

♪ Peel me a grape... ♪

(mouthing)

(honks horn)

This is usually a
quiet neighborhood.

Yeah, well, my lips
will help you forget.

(honking continues)

(door opens)

Oh, my God, it's my wife.

Say no more.

Go out that way.

Angela, what a surprise.

I didn't see your
car. You need a ride?

Come on.

Know what? You're
lucky I'm a jealous guy.

I wouldn't have been
here to save you.

I save myself.
Shut up and drive.

(tires squeal)

Coming.

(Kyle groans)

God, Kyle.

I was kind of expecting
room service here. Sorry.

Breakfast for two?

AMANDA: Kyle.

What a surprise.

Yeah, uh, I-I heard that
your agency shut down.

I was worried about you, but
I should have known better.

Wherever you are,
Burns is never far behind.

Sorry to interrupt.

I'll be right back. Kyle, wait.

I don't want you
to go away angry.

I-I appreciate your
concern, I really do.

I'm not angry, I am embarrassed.

I'm embarrassed that I
came here in the first place.

I hope you'll be happy.

♪ You give yourself
to me completely ♪

♪ Without a single
thing to hide ♪

♪ I've been searching
far and wide ♪

♪ To find one so true ♪

♪ I wish I'd fall
in love with you ♪

Hey.

You look beautiful.

Well, I was hoping
to pick up a great guy.

What's that take?

An apology, for the
way I behaved yesterday.

It was all my fault.

Well, that's funny.

Once I cooled off, I
realized it was my fault.

You're right, I got to make
a clean break from Amanda.

- I got to put her in the past.
- You saw her, didn't you?

Yeah. I went to her
hotel just to make sure

she was okay. Guess
who she was rooming with?

Burns. They even
had matching robes.

I'm sorry.

I'm not.

I'm glad she has
somebody to lean on.

Want to dance?

I'd love to.

♪ And so I have
this little secret ♪

♪ One that I can't
bear to convey ♪

♪ Maybe I'll wake up someday ♪

♪ And out of the blue ♪

♪ I will fall in love... ♪

You know, not that
I'm complaining,

but I meant it last night

when I said that I was
jealous, you know?

I don't want to share you with
a cheeseball like Tony Marlin.

Aw, honey, you won't have to.

From now on, it's
just me and my fish.

Oh, wow.

There are the contracts
I almost had Tony sign.

But, unlike some
people, like Amanda,

I'm willing to
admit when I failed.

There's no account that is worth
what I went through last night.

That was absolutely
the last straw.

So, you're throwing
in the towel?

I mean, cross your heart?

I cross my little heart
that beats only for you.

I've been humiliated
long enough, Michael.

All for what, huh?
Money, success?

No. I'm making a U-turn.

You know what? If I can't
have everything good in life,

well, at least I can have you.

- Sure you don't want to rephrase that?
- Mmm.

(knocking)

Mm, I better go get
rid of whoever that is.

(Michael groans, Lexi chuckles)

I'm here to apologize
for last night,

for putting you through that.

Oh, well, that is so sweet.

So I thought we'd pick
up where we left off.

- Oh...
- (Michael clears throat)

Oh, wow, where are my manners?

Tony Marlin, this is one
of my tenants, Dr. Mancini.

Nice to meet you, Doctor.

Now, we were just in
the middle of something.

Yes, we were just discussing
how Dr. Mancini doesn't like

to share things like
the laundry room, huh?

And, well, that's just too bad.

Listen, why don't you
make yourself at home?

I'll be right back.

I can't believe this. A
minute ago, you were ready

to spend the rest
of your life with me.

Yes, but when it comes
to getting something

that Amanda wants, I'm like
a pit bull in heat. Good night!

(clears throat)

Dinner? Were you
expecting company?

No, I just had a feeling
that you might stop by.

Sort of a psychic thing.

I mean, don't you feel it?

The connection between us?

I'd be able to
feel it more in bed.

Well, I'd love to give you
a grand tour of my place.

I need a minute. I'll
meet you in the bedroom.

All right.

♪♪

Sign on the dotted
line and I promise

to show you the
time of your life.

Careful, it's a rollerball.

(laughs)

Ooh.

That's nice.

When did you start drinking?

I'm not drinking,
I'm celebrating.

Oh.

To the end of my marriage.

Didn't you hear?

- Peter dumped me...
- (sighs)

over breakfast.

Over easy.

(laughs)

You want to know why?

Amanda.

It's always Peter and Amanda.

Okay, Eve, I'm
gonna take you home.

No. No, no, it's the
last place I want to go!

Okay.

For all I know, for all I know,

they've been together
since, since I hit town.

Since they were swearing
that they weren't together

and you were throwing
Amanda out of windows. (laughs)

Okay, listen, if
there is anybody

that knows how
you feel, it's me.

You just, you got to let it go.

It's gone, I'm over it.

Besides, I already
have a date for tonight.

Mm! Did I ever tell you?

When I was in high
school, I was a cheerleader.

And I dated the captain
of the football team.

And then I k*lled him.

(laughs)

There's still some men in
L.A. who want to sleep with me.

Oh, yeah, if it
isn't the town bully.

I thought I told you
to stay away from...

No, Kyle, hey, hold on a second.

Leave him alone. He's my date.

What?

Don't mess with me, all right?
'Cause I will press charges

next time you let your
fists do the walking.

He's practically
a cop. L.A. Patrol.

Yeah, that's right.
Got the law on my side.

Let's go, darling.

(Lexi moaning)

You know, Tony, I'm
doing all the work here.

A little reciprocation
would be nice. (chuckles)

Tony?

Tony...

(phone rings)

Yeah?

Michael, you've got to help me!

Oh, forget it, Lexi. I'm
watching pay-per-view.

Michael, get your
butt up here right now!

Tony's not breathing.
I think I k*lled him!

(pounding on door)

What took you so long?!

- Bedroom?
- Yeah, yeah.

Oh, boy.

Yeah, good diagnosis.

He's dead.

Oh, my God.

Eve?

Eve?

(couple laughing)

Wow, what's going on?

What does it look like?

You're the Christmas
tree guy, huh?

The prison guard
she's so afraid of.

Yeah, well, she's not
afraid of me anymore.

(Eve laughs) It's the
best sex I ever had.

Ten times the man you are.

Don't do this to yourself.

Why don't you get
the hell out of here?

Go on.

Get out. Take
your junk with you.

Where were we?

(both laugh)

You, you were incredible.

You fulfilled all my fantasies.

Would you like to fulfill
one of my fantasies?

Anything you want,
darling. You just name it.

I want you to make my husband...

Correction, my ex-husband...

And his blonde slut
pay for hurting me.

I want you to make them bleed.

(laughs)

Maybe, maybe you could ask
me something else, all right?

Um, I'm trying to, you know,
turn over a new leaf here.

I got a future. I don't
want to screw that up.

Get out. Get out!

Get the hell out of here!

I don't need you here! Get out!

Lady, you're a real looker,
but you're off your rocker.

(grunts) Get out
before I make you bleed!

- I don't need you!
- (door shuts)

I don't need anybody!

I'm a cheerleader. (chuckles)

Two, four...

six, eight...

who can I annihilate?