10x09 - Undercover

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Columbo". Aired: February 20, 1968 – January 30, 2003.*
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Columbo is a homicide detective whose trademarks include his rumpled beige raincoat, unassuming demeanor, cigar, old Peugeot 403 car, and an unseen wife.
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10x09 - Undercover

Post by bunniefuu »

If it's Thursday night, it's a no.
Why can't you make it...

I have to hang up, Thelma.
There's sh**ting upstairs.

They're all yours, JT.

Jeez, what a mess.

Whoever trashed this place
wanted something bad.

That's what's bothering me. What would
anybody want in a place like this?

Lieutenant, this is Mrs. Byrnes,
the manager of the building.

She called to report the sh*ts.

As soon as I heard 'em.

Never could understand people
mistaking 'em for a car backfiring.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Byrnes,
that you gotta see this...

but we do have to have somebody
identify the victims.

The one with the Kn*fe in his throat,
that's Mr. Dillinger... JJ Dillinger.

We found marks in that window
where somebody broke in.

It's probably the guy in the sneakers.
Did you ever see that man before, ma'am?

Can't say I have.

What can you tell us about Mr. Dillinger?

Not much.
Been here five, six months.

Kept to himself, he was quiet.
Paid his rent on time.

And carried a g*n.

If you worked nights,
you'd feel safer with a g*n too.

Would you know where he worked, ma'am?

Silver Lake somewhere.
I can check on my rent application.

I'd appreciate that.
You've been very helpful.

If there's ever anything you need.

Some more patrols would help.
This is the fifth burglary this year.

You'll get written reports in the morning.

- Would you like some educated guesses?
- Why not?

Looks like the first b*llet
hit this one a little low.

It probably deflected off a rib.

Anyway, that didn't stop him right away.
You see the left clenched fist.

Probably threw a punch and still had time
to stick his Kn*fe in the sh**t's throat...

probably just as the g*n went off
for the second time.

Looks like the sh*t
went clean through the heart.

Kn*fe broke off as he fell.

sh**t went down too,
probably d*ed within a few minutes.

OK, Doc. Thanks a lot.

It's an open-and-shut case,
double homicide.

What have you got?

Burglary tools.

Wallet.

Let's see.

"Eugene Edward Ehrbach."

Address over on Rossmoor.
Fancy neighbourhood.

I don't know whether you noticed...

but what's a guy in an expensive Italian
leather jacket doing in a place like this?

Maybe this is what he was looking for.

What is it?

It's a piece of a photograph.

What does it look like to you?

Belly dancer at Harrods.

Lieutenant, you think a guy
would break into this dump for that?

Well, I can't figure him climbing
two storeys of a fire escape...

then through a window...

with a piece of a snapshot in his hand.

Belly dancer, huh?

What do you think this furry stuff is?

Mud? Stucco? Could be anything.

I'm gonna check the records
on Dillinger and Ehrbach.

For what? I mean, two lowlifes k*lled
each other. Case closed. Let's move on.

Well, it's just so strange.

I mean, two guys
k*lled each other over this.

What the hell is it?
It's a piece of a snapshot.

You know, it's not like somebody
just ripped up a photograph.

It's been carefully carved
into this shape.

Excuse me.
I'm looking for Detective Brown.

That's me.

OK to come in?

Come ahead.

- Hi. Irving Krutch. Nice to meet you.
- How do you do?

OK to sit down?

Sure, sit.

Oh.

So...

got yourself a little m*rder, huh?

The two guys over on Culver Avenue.
I read about it in the paper this morning.

What about 'em?

I should tell you I'm an insurance
investigator... Translife Insurance.

Been with 'em years.
Started there right after college, Princeton.

Right.

So, I read about the two corpses,
I figured I'd better get up there right away.

Why?

Lend a hand, or maybe vice versa.

You know something about the killings?

Yes, sir.

What?

The newspaper said you found
a piece of a photograph.

Is that it?

What about it?

I got another one.

If you check Ehrbach's pad,
I'm sure you'll find a third piece.

Mr. Krutch, do you want to tell us,
or do we have to pull teeth?

Will you help me?

To do what?

First, to get the piece
out of Ehrbach's place.

Why do you want it?

Three pieces are better than one.

If you have something to say, would
you say it? Otherwise, have a nice day.

Let me fill you in.

Please do.

Six years ago in this city, in broad
daylight, on a rainy afternoon in August...

four men held up the Culver Avenue
branch of the NSLA.

They got away with $ million.
Do you remember the case?

Yes, I remember it, I worked on it.

Go ahead.

I'm sorry,
I don't think I got your name.

Uh...

Columbo.

Nice to meet you. Are you Italian?

Yes, I am.

The leader of the g*ng was Italian.

Anthony "Tony the Nose" Bonamico.
Record as long as your arm.

Just got out of Castlefield,
where he's serving a five-and-dime.

First thing he does, still on parole,
he holds up a bank.

The two g*ns were both ex-cons.
Leo D'Amore and Mikey Ryan.

A kid named David Stein was the wheel
man. It was his first job and he blew it.

Did I mention it was raining?

Yeah.

Car goes into a skid, hits another vehicle,
causes a traffic tie-up.

Squad car comes, the g*ng starts sh**ting,
all four are dead within minutes.

- Are my facts correct so far?
- They are, yeah.

My facts are always correct.

But the money isn't there. minutes
after the hold-up, not a dime in the car.

Translife gets called in,
Irving Krutch investigating.

Result... two years' intensive search,
nothing, gagoots.

We finally settle the claim in full.
$ million.

Hello! That was bad.
I don't have to tell you how bad that was.

It was especially bad for Irving Krutch...

who's now handling minor claims at less
salary than he was making four years ago.

May I ask, why do you want
these three pieces of the photograph?

Let me ask you, sir,
where did the money go?

Good question.

That was the question.
What happened to the money?

I couldn't sleep. In fact, for four years,
I've been obsessed with this question.

Then I finally got a break
a couple of months ago.

I followed up on this.

How did you follow up?

I got a copy of her will.
She left everything to her sister.

An old Italian lady named Lucia.

Certain mementos, photographs,
a photographic segment...

documents, including...

this list of names.

You should know this is in
Tony Bonamico's handwriting.

- Why is it torn?
- Maybe it was an accident.

But considering the way Bonamico cut the photo,
I figure he ripped it deliberately...

and somebody else
has the other part of this list.

And here, also part of Mary's will,
a photographic segment.

How do we know that...

these two pieces come from
the same photograph?

Oh, it's no accident. Both pieces
are cut up like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.

And no accident both pieces
belong to two names on the list.

Mine came from Mary Bonamico's will
and yours came from Dillinger.

Plus, yours was found in the dead hand
of a third name on the list...

Eugene E Ehrbach.

Who's Mo Weinberg?

A buddy of David Stein, who screwed up
the getaway. Making sense?

Not much.

He's a hood like the other two.

- What other two?
- Ehrbach and Dillinger.

Dillinger got arrested for pushing,
Ehrbach for burglary. Check it out.

What about these other names on the list?
Do they mean anything to you?

I don't know.
I just hope there are only seven.

Seven puzzle pieces are enough,
don't you think?

Mr. Krutch, once you've assembled
this puzzle...

then what?

I will have the exact location of the
$ million stolen some six years ago.

How do you know that?

The Italian lady, Mary's sister, told me.

She remembered the photograph
showed where the treasure was.

In fact, she used the Italian word tesoro.

- You speak Italian?
- Tesoro... treasure.

So now there are two pieces to the puzzle?
What do you want from us?

Help me find the other five.
I can't keep breaking into places.

Where did you break in?

Dillinger's and Ehrbach's a few times.

Plus, I'm pretty sure
that Weinberg knows I'm watching him.

So now you want us
to break into places for you?

We're talking about $ million here.

That would be quite a feather in your cap.
Am I wrong?

No, you're not.

So do it!

Do what?

Go over Ehrbach's with a fine comb.

You can do it legally.
He's a homicide victim.

OK.

- Then you'll have the third piece.
- Then what?

Go after Weinberg.

Ah.

I'm going to leave you the list
and this piece.

You won't need them?

I've got copies.

OK. Here's my card.

Let me know what you decide.

Detective Columbo and Detective Brown.

They don't even look like they fit.
Some guy comes in with this story.

What does he expect us to do?
Drop everything and go on a treasure hunt?

There's a possibility he's right.

Where did he get the story?
An old lady that barely speaks English?

That's right.

He said she told him in Italian...

the picture shows where "tresoro" is buried.

- Tesoro.
- "Tresoro."

- Tesoro.
- Whatever.

OK, you guys got one day.
That's it.

Check out Ehrbach's apartment.
Nothing there, back to the salt mines.

We're looking for a thing
that could be this big...

but it could be smaller.

So it could be anywhere.

Yeah, where?

I don't know. You think he could have
rolled it up and stuck it into a cigar?

- It's possible.
- Did you check the cigar box?

- I checked it, but I didn't split the cigars.
- Try it. We might get lucky.

I've already done that.

I'm getting punchy.

One of those bulbs is out.

Are you doing that with your finger?

I'm gonna get cancer of the...

There she is.

They don't fit.

Weinberg's piece may link 'em.

If he has one.
You see the size of this guy's record?

He's a professional, habitual criminal.

He's dangerous.
He goes around b*ating up people.

He's not going to cooperate
with a police officer.

You don't go to a guy like this
and say, "Excuse me..."

You gotta pass as a pusher or a burglar...

You have to go undercover.
Who'll do it? You?

No. Him.

You?

- Yeah.
- You?

And he doesn't even
have to change clothes.

Move out of your house, get a cheap room.

Never come here.
Set up a drop with Brown.

And you will have to change clothes.

I look forward to it.

And you have to carry a g*n.

I don't need no g*n.

You carry it or you don't go!

OK.

You look like a cop.

So do you.

How do I know you're not?

How do I know you're not?

Why don't you sit down?

Sure.

Let's hear it again.

What? From the top?

From the top. Your name first.

Arty Stokes. Salt Lake City.
You ever been there?

No.

Oh, it's nice. You like to ski?

Supposed to be nice skiing there.

Did you call me down here
to talk about the Olympics?

No, I thought you might be a skier.

I'm still waiting for the story.

I already gave it to you on the phone.

Give it again.

Why?

Say I had a poor connection.

OK.

A couple of weeks ago, I bought a piece
of a picture and a couple of names...

from a guy in Salt Lake City,
cost me two grand.

What was his name?

Bobby Firth.

He just done eight years, armed robbery,
got out in April. He was busted.

So what did he have?

A piece of a snapshot and two names.

You gave him two grand for this?

That's right.

Why?

Because Firth told me
I can make four million...

just by fitting my piece of the snapshot
into the whole picture.

I'm surprised he didn't try to sell you
the Brooklyn Bridge.

This ain't the Brooklyn Bridge,
Weinberg, and you know it.

So now you have a piece of a snapshot?

That's right.

What's the two names?

You're one of them.

Yeah? And the other one?

I'll tell you that when we make the deal.

What's these names supposed to be?

The names of two people
who also got a piece of that photograph.

Two names?

That's right.

Your pal tell you how you can get four
million pasting the pictures together?

He did.

How?

Weinberg, you know and I know...

that the whole picture shows where
Anthony Bonamico dropped the bank loot.

- I don't know what you're talking...
- All right.

You wanna keep on playing cute,
or you wanna make a deal?

Who else knows about this?

Nobody. Who did you tell?

You think I'm crazy?

There's big money involved here.

All of a sudden,
you know big money's involved.

All right, Weinberg, this is the deal.
You take it or leave it.

I put up the name of the piece I got,
you put up the name of the piece you got.

We find the loot, we split it - .
Yes or no?

We've got a deal.

We'll meet later at my place
and we'll put everything on the table then.

Where is it?

South Kirby, apartment .

What time?

Ten OK with you?

I'll be there.

Just a minute.
I'm in the bathroom.

Come in, it's open.

Drop the g*n! Move over there!

Were you gonna hit me on the head
and steal my piece of the photo?

No, I wasn't going to hit you on the head.

No? Not on the head?
Where? The knee?

I wasn't going to hit you anywhere.

Were you gonna sh**t me?

You kidding? No.

Not sh**t me? That's how you greet people
hide behind the door with a g*n.

I thought you were someone else.

You had an accident to your head as a kid
or were you born Ret*rded?

You're insulting me.

You're insulting me with your lying!

Loosen up, pal. What's your problem?

You wanna make two million?

Yeah.

So do I.

Here. Your g*n.

Do we shake hands all over again?

I'd like to.

Let's see your piece of the picture.

Let's see yours.

Oh, the mutual faith and trust aside?

OK, we'll do it together.

Is that Firth's piece?

Yeah, I got it from Firth.

Oh, we're gonna be good partners.
Look at this. They fit.

And now the names.

Eugene Edward Ehrbach.

Geraldine Ferguson.

Ehrbach's dead.

What?

He was k*lled on Wednesday. The cops...

- Dead? Dead?
- Dead.

- Dead? Dead?
- Dead.

What is this? A double-cross?

You're gonna have to calm down.

I'll bust your head,
that's what I'm gonna do!

He had a piece of the photograph.

Who?

- Ehrbach.
- A piece of our picture?

Why didn't you say? Where is it?

The cops got it.

The cops? Damn, Stokes.

Cops can be bought.

Whatever they find on Ehrbach...

I don't like negotiating with the fuzz.

To survive in the city, you got to.

Biggest thieves in the world.

Let me handle it, I got an in there.

Cost you $ tops.
Now, what about this Geraldine?

Ferguson, owns an art gallery.

I've busted into her house six or seven
times already. Couldn't find a picture.

She probably got it you know where.

You got a copy of that?

Naturally. You?

Naturally.

You wanna exchange pieces, is that it?

That's it.

Done.

Excuse me.

I did good.

I got a copy of Weinberg's piece.

Take it down to headquarters
and keep it with the other three pieces.

Captain's worried about how
you've made out with the muscle guy.

Is that right?

Well, you can tell him
that Weinberg and I, we hit it off just fine.

Tell him I'll be in touch, and tell
the captain I'm going after the fifth piece.

The Geraldine on the list is a Geraldine
Ferguson of the Ferguson Gallery.

Hi.

Hi.

A lovely morning, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

So what are you doing inside?

I like art.

Are you here for the Ganzagos?

I don't think so.
What are the Ganzagos?

Luis Ganzagos... he's a painter.

We've got other things. What are you
interested in? Paintings or sculpture?

Is this your gallery?

Yes, it is.

Then you're Miss Ferguson?
I mean, this is the Ferguson Gallery...

so I guess you're Miss Ferguson, right?

Well, Mrs. Ferguson really,
but not really.

I was married to Mr. Ferguson,
Mr. Harold Ferguson.

But Mr. Ferguson and I
no longer share bed and board...

so whereas I'm still Geraldine Ferguson,
I'm no longer Mrs. Ferguson.

I don't even know what my name is.
Call me Gerry.

What's your name?

Arthur Stokes.

Are you a cop, Arthur?

No. What gave you that idea?

You're careful, like a cop.
Also, you carry a g*n.

Do I?

Mm-hm.

Right there.

I didn't think it showed.

My husband was in the diamond business
and he had a carry permit.

So when your husband carries a g*n,
you get used to the way it looks.

Why do you carry a g*n, Arthur?
Are you in the diamond business?

No, I'm in the insurance business.

Oh, do insurance men wear g*ns?
I didn't know that.

Yeah.

If they're insurance investigators.

Don't tell me,
someone had a painting stolen...

and you're here to check on authenticity?

No. Well, not exactly.

I think you're a cop, Arthur.
I really do.

Now, why would a cop be visiting you,
Miss Ferguson?

Gerry.

Maybe because I charge such exorbitant prices.

I don't really.

Yes, I do really.

Would you like to look at some pictures
while you decide if you're a cop?

Over here.

Well, I did have
a specific picture in mind.

Did someone see it here?

I don't think so.

What kind of a painting was it?

It's not a painting. It's a photograph.

Then it could have never been here.
We never had a photographic show.

It's not even a whole photograph.

Yo-ho. What happened to the other guy?

What other guy?

The guy that's been here three or four
thousand times in the past few months.

He's about yay tall,
no neck, lots of muscle.

Looks like the guy that played in Rocky.

He told me his name was Al Randolph
the first time he came in.

Then he forgot what he told me and said
he was Al Reinhart the second time.

Is he a cop too?

Neither of us are cops.

Mr. Stark.

Stokes.

Just checking. Mr. Stokes.

Arthur.

Arthur.

I don't have what you're looking for.

Believe me, if I did, I'd sell it to you,
assuming the price was right.

The price can be made right.

How right is right?

Do you have it?

No. I'm sorry, I don't.

Yes, she does.

Kahn. Bramley Kahn. How do you do?

Bram, you're a pain in the ass.

Arthur Stokes. Pleased to meet you.

Well, if we're going to talk business,
I suggest we go into the office.

Shall we?

How much are you
willing to pay for it, Mr. Stokes?

Oh, that depends.

On what?

On whether or not
it's a piece you already have?

You do have a piece, don't you?
Or several pieces?

Is it for sale or not?

No.

How many pieces do you have,
Mr. Stokes?

Do you know what the picture
is supposed to reveal?

My client...

Your client my ass! You're a cop!
Who are you trying to kid, Arthur?

Are you a policeman, Mr. Stokes?

No.

Miss Ferguson knows about cops.

Keep your mouth shut, Bram.

Miss Ferguson's sister is Ginny D'Amore.

Her husband was a cheap gangster
named Leo D'Amore.

He was k*lled some six years ago
following a bank hold-up.

Well, I don't keep track of such things.

I just bet you don't.

He's a cop, Bram. And you're a fool.

Look, you and your partner
seem to have some differences.

Why don't you ring me
when you get it settled?

Where can you be reached?

I'm at the Vincent Arms.
That's a fleabag over on North Farm.

Are you an out-of-towner, Mr. Stokes?

Room .

You didn't answer my question.

You didn't answer any of mine either.

I hope you reconsider, Miss Ferguson.

Mr. Krutch, Lieutenant Columbo.

Well, this is a pleasant surprise.

We decided to take the investigation.

I thought you would.
You found what you were looking for?

Yes, but even better than that.

What do you mean?

We made contact with Weinberg. He has
another piece and gave me a copy of it.

Fantastic.
When do I get to have a look at it?

Not tonight.
We'll set a time, maybe tomorrow.

Good, fine.
Where can I get a hold of you if I need to?

I'm only three blocks from Weinberg.

I'm staying at the Vincent Arms, room .

Let me jot this down.
Vincent Arms, room .

We're off to a good start.
I can't tell you how much I appreciate this.

We all stand to gain. I gotta
get off the phone, I'm expecting a call.

Oh, you got another lead?

Yes.

The Geraldine on your list,
that's a Geraldine Ferguson.

And her sister was married
to one of the guys in the bank hold-up.

Leo D'Amore.

Ferguson runs an art gallery
over on Jefferson.

Who gave you that?

Weinberg.

Has she got anything?

I think so, that's what I'm waiting to hear.

Well, will you let me know?

As soon as anything gels.

Good. Thanks again for calling.
This is great news. Really.

Right. So long.

Yeah?

Desk clerk, Mr. Stokes.

I'm coming.

What is it?

Lady left a message, said to bring it up.

Lieutenant?

I'm OK.

The hell you are.

No, I'm OK.

I'm gonna get a meat wagon over here.

I hate hospitals.

How do you like comas?

I'm not in a coma.

Look, I just want to get some ice for that lump.
Man, that's some lump.

Jeez, I came... came to.
I got...

I got this towel.
I must have passed out again.

Did I wake you?

What?

Get some ice up here
on the double, room .

Room service is closed.

Well, open it. This is the police.

Did you see who did it?

I saw him, but he had his face covered.

You're lucky he left you alive.

Why wouldn't he? He wasn't after me.
He was after the picture.

Who do you think it was?

My partner, Mo Weinberg.

How do you know it was him?

I don't know for sure,
but I had him on the phone this afternoon.

He knew I was here.

Who else did you talk to?

Irving Krutch.

- Well, it could have been Krutch.
- It could have been Krutch.

But my money is on Mo.

How's your head?

Terrible.

I think I'd better get a meat wagon.

No, you don't.

I gotta go see Mo Weinberg.

Just shut up. I'll go see Mo Weinberg.
You're going to the hospital.

You need something, Lieutenant?

Yes, ma'am.

I need a phone. I have to call
the officer who brought me here.

The doctor's instructions are no phone calls.
I can take a message.

We're in the middle
of a homicide investigation.

And we don't want you to be a victim.

Concussion can lead
to internal haemorrhage.

I don't think you understand, this is very serious.
My partner could be in danger.

I need a phone or I have to leave.

I don't think you understand, Lieutenant.
The doctor left strict orders.

You're to remain here until he can see you
again tomorrow. You need absolute rest.

What I need is to get out of here.

No, you don't, big boy.
Not without these.

What are you doing?

You're not leaving.

Well, then get me a phone.

No calls in or out.

One call?
Even a prisoner gets one phone call!

Who is it there?

A friend of Mo's.

He's asleep,
the same as everybody else around here.

- Hello.
- I can't talk loud, it's not my phone.

Uh-oh. Arty, I gotta be quiet.
You talk.

I'm here with Weinberg.

Oh, yeah? So what did he say?

Nothing, he's dead.

He what?

He's got a big hole in him, he's dead.

Dead? Oh, my God.

Dead?

We gotta get over to Krutch's right away.
I'll need a pair of pants.

I'm sorry, sir.
I'll be done in one moment.

You wanna go to Krutch's?

You get over here.

I want to go over there immediately,
and bring a pair of pants.

I didn't get that last part.

Pants. Pants, pants...
something to wear.

Otherwise I can't get out of here.

Sorry.

Dead? Who's dead?

No one. Everything's fine.
Go back to sleep.

Harry, you all right?

Say something, Harry.

Good night.

Night.

Sergeant Arthur Brown, Mr. Krutch.

Mr. Krutch.

What's the matter?

Just a few questions.

At three in the morning?

We're both awake.

I wasn't a minute ago. Besides...

This won't take long, Mr. Krutch.

Lieutenant Columbo, I didn't see you.
Come on in.

What's up?

You and I spoke on the phone
around four o'clock this afternoon?

Yes, we did. Why?

Where did you go after the conversation?

Nowhere.

You stayed here? Anybody with you?

Yes. A friend of mine.

Male or female?

A girl.

What time did she leave?

We left together, went to dinner.

Where did you go?

The Ram's Head,
the top of Jefferson.

What time did you leave the restaurant?

About : , I guess.

Where did you go after that?

For a walk. We looked through
all the shop windows on Hall Avenue.

What time did you get home?

About midnight.

Alone?

No.

The girl came back with you?

Yes.

So she was with you
between what time and what time?

She got here earlier this afternoon.

I don't know. She was definitely here
when you called. She's still here.

Where?

In bed.

Get her up.

Why?

One man's been assaulted,
another one's been k*lled.

I want her to tell me where you were when
this was happening. Is that OK with you?

Who was k*lled?

You know who was assaulted?

No. No, I don't.

Why did you only ask who was k*lled?

Aren't you interested
in who was beaten up?

Of course. Let me get her.
She'll clear this up in a minute.

I hope so.

This is Detective Brown. He wants to...

I'll ask her.

What's your name, miss?

Suzie.

Suzie what?

Suzie Endicott.

Miss Endicott,
what time did you get here today?

About : , wasn't it?
: , : ?

About then.

What time did you go out to dinner?

About : , : .

Where did you eat?

The Ram's Head.

Where did you go after that?

We...

We walked for a little bit
and then we came back here.

What time was that?

I guess we got back here about .

Have you been here since?

Mm-hm.

Miss Endicott...

did Mr. Krutch leave you any time...

between : and now?

Yeah.

When he went to the men's room
at the restaurant.

Happy now?

Overjoyed.

Mr. Krutch...

are you familiar with timetables?

What do you mean? Train timetables?

No, investigating timetables.

You're an insurance investigator,
I thought you might.

What happened to your head?

I fell off a ladder.

I'm sorry to hear that.

I want you to draw me up a timetable.

I want you to list everything you did...

and the exact time that you did it.

From pm to right this minute.

We'll wait.

Hey!

Hey!

What are you doing?! Come on!

- Come on!
- Read the sign.

I just put it there minutes ago!

Come on!

minutes ago, I just put it there.
Ten minutes ago!

You bloodsucking witch!

Lieutenant.

Did you find anything?

Nothing. Whoever k*lled Weinberg
got his pieces of photograph.

Or Weinberg stashed them
someplace else...

because I've been through everything
and there's nothing here.

So whoever did it got two pieces?

Weinberg's and the copy
of the piece I gave Weinberg.

I got your pants.

If you want 'em, you can keep 'em.

Well, let me think about that for a while.

No.

Hey, Lieutenant.

We got your Mafia costume.
What do we do with it?

Uh, pull over there
and I'll change in the car.

Come on down, we can talk.
I'm gonna change in the car.

That's important. Let me write that down.

Weinberg's time of death
was : pm Saturday afternoon.

And there were two witnesses
and they each heard two sh*ts.

And the medical examiner...

he said the time of death
was also approximately : pm, right?

Right.

OK.

Oh...

McKittrick.

In this jacket, you'll find Krutch's timetable
with his whereabouts yesterday.

Check it out and get back to me.

Where's the pants to this outfit?

They're there.

I don't see 'em.

Maybe they're in the bag.

Stay there. There's a lady coming.

Detective Brown.

Yeah.

Today is Sunday,
so the Ferguson Gallery is closed.

So that's a good day
to go in there and look around.

Can that be arranged?

I think so.

There might be a safe in there.
Be nice to know what's inside.

Anything you can do would be appreciated.

I'll do my best, sir.

And...

what do you plan to do now that
you're wearing that expensive suit?

Today is Sunday...

so I'll go to church.

I would like to offer my belated
condolences on the death of your sister.

You knew my sister Mary?

Not personally, but I knew her husband.

He was a good friend.
We did business together.

Oh, you worked with Anthony? Nice.

What's your name?

Columbo.

La famiglia Columbo?
I'm honoured to meet you.

Can I offer you a ride?

Excuse me. I think you come here for
other reasons than to express sympathy.

I'm curious about a piece of a picture
that your sister left you in the will.

I know very little.

But you know about the full picture.

That's where they hid the treasure.

What treasure?

Maybe I don't understand.

Didn't you tell the insurance man
about a treasure?

No.

When you gave him the piece
of the picture and that list of names.

I gave him a piece of a picture...

and he still has to pay me
the money he promised.

You never gave him a list of names?

No. Never.

Thank you very much.

Did anyone else show an interest
in that picture?

Oh, yes.

That Ferguson woman.

Geraldine.

Geraldine Ferguson.

Through her messenger, Signore Kahn.

I couldn't do business with her.

My poor sister,
she would turn in the grave...

if she knew that I did business
with the innamorata of her husband.

Anthony.

You mean Geraldine Ferguson
and Tony Bonamico together?

Was a shame for the family...

You've been very helpful.

Thank you again.

Maybe you can help me.

Maybe you can, I don't know,
force that man to pay me the money he owes me.

Times are not easy, you know.

I see what I can do.

Oh, hell.

That's right, here come the cops.

He's admitting it. Come in.
I admire an honest man.

Drink? Or is it too early?

It's nearly two o'clock.

Name it.

I'd rather keep a clear head.

OK, keep a clear head.
I'll have one, though, if you don't mind.

I find Sundays very boring.

After I've read Geoffrey Levin and the
comics, there's nothing exciting left.

Who's Geoffrey Levin?

Arthur.

Yes?

- That is what you call yourself, isn't it?
- Uh-huh.

- Why are you wearing those clothes?
- I'm a cop working undercover.

You sure you're not a mental patient?

Pretty sure.

Yesterday you were an insurance investigator.

That was for your benefit. Today I had to
visit the sister-in-law of a dead mob boss.

Tony "the Nose" Bonamico.

Did he have a big nose?

Yes, he did.

He also had a girlfriend
named Gerry Ferguson.

Arthur.

Yes?

That's a nasty-looking bump
on your head.

Yes, it is.

Does it hurt?

A bit.

It's awful-looking. Sit down.

What for?

I'm going to make you feel better.

I don't think you...

That's right, don't think.

Sit there, stretch out your legs,
relax, close your eyes.

Miss Ferguson.

Gerry.

Someone was m*rder*d last night.

Who?

That man that kept visiting your gallery
who said his name was Al Reinhart...

and then he said he was Al Randolph.

What was his real name?

Mo Weinberg. Mean anything to you?

No.

What's your real name?

Lieutenant Columbo.

Your first name.

Lieutenant.

You're putting me on.

On Wednesday...

- How did we get back to Wednesday?
- I took us back there.

On Wednesday night,
two men k*lled each other in a brawl.

Who?

That's not important.

What is important is one of 'em
had a piece of a photograph.

Are we gonna start that again?
I already told you.

We have reason to believe
the fragment in the dead man's hand...

was part of a larger picture
showing the location of $ million...

stolen from the bank six years ago.

We also believe that you have
another piece of that picture.

And we want it.
It's as simple as that.

What smoked you out, Arthur?
What made you drop the phoney cover?

Afraid somebody else might get k*lled?

It's possible.

- Me?
- Possibly.

Whoever has a piece is in danger.
For your own safety...

Bullshit.

I beg your pardon?

The day the cops start worrying
about anybody's safety is the day...

I think we'd better head downtown.
Wanna get dressed?

No, I don't. What'll the charge be?
Drinking in my pyjamas?

Miss Ferguson,
I'm conducting a m*rder investigation.

OK, OK, OK.
Stop spouting legalities.

Sit down. I'd rather talk here
than in some stuffy old squad room.

- Do you have a piece of the photograph?
- Yes.

Where did you get it?

My brother-in-law.

- Leo D'Amore?
- Yes.

When?

Just before the hold-up.

What did he say about it?

That I should hold onto it.

Why you and not your sister?

My sister's a ditz, always was.
Leo knew who the smart one was.

Did he give you the list too?

What list?

The list of names.

I don't know anything about a list.

That's a lie.

I've never seen it.

You're lying. We know your partner has it.
Where did he get it?

I don't know anything about it.
What's it supposed to be?

Forget it. Where's your piece of the sh*t?

In the gallery safe.

Will you turn it over to me?

No.

- I thought you said...
- I said I'd answer your questions.

But the piece of photograph is my private
property and I'll do with it what I wish.

Thank you for your time.

So where are you going?

I'm gonna try and find the person
that m*rder*d Mo Weinberg.

Well, be careful.
Lots of people with g*ns out there.

I'll be seeing you again.

Sunday afternoons.
Any other time, I'm busy.

All right, Ernie. That's it with the limo.
Get it back to the rental.

I got your clothes.
Wanna change now?

No, not this minute.
Where's Brown?

Right there.

We got the blow-ups.

Oh, good. That's good.
Jeff, move out. Let Ernie out.

And bring my clothes.

Hey, Zeke. Good to see you.

I've been waiting here for half an hour.

I know you have.

Give me a minute with the boys
and I'll be right with you.

Have something on me while you wait.

Appreciate that.

Bill, give Mr. Rivers a glass of water.


The water here is outstanding.

I can't thank you enough.

My pleasure.

Lieutenant, this is a blow-up of the torn
list of names we got from Krutch.

This is a blow-up of the list of names
I took from Bramley Kahn's cash box.

And this is a blow-up
of the two pieces of paper put together.

Obviously a perfect fit.

So this is the complete list?

OK, just...

just talking out loud...

the first four names on that list...

Weinberg, Dillinger, Ehrbach
and Mary Bonamico... they're all dead.

And we have copies...

of Weinberg's piece...

of Dillinger's piece,
which we found in Ehrbach's dead hand.

Ehrbach's piece...

which we found in the light bulb socket.

And Mary Bonamico's piece,
which we got from Krutch.

And the fifth name on the list...

Geraldine Ferguson...
just admitted she has another piece.

And her piece
is in her gallery in the safe.

That's the first thing we gotta do Monday...
get a judge, warrant, and look at that safe.

Regarding the sixth
and seventh name on the list.

Dorothea McNally and Derrick Combs.

Now, we have gone over the directories
for the entire Los Angeles area.

There are two Derrick Combs.
One in Riverside and one in Inglewood.

Now, there are McNallys,
none of them named Dorothea.

But there is a listing
for one "D McNally".

On th Street, off Skid Row.
Now, how do you wanna hit them?

If I can make a suggestion.
We have your clothes here.

And I think you'd fit in nicely
with the folks at Skid Row.

Maybe you should take McNally.

Sounds right.

What do you think?

Sounds right.
I'll go after the two Derrick Combs.

Fine. And we'll meet at the squad room at
six o'clock and we'll see where we're at.

Lieutenant, we're almost finished
checking out Krutch's timetable.

So far, it's rock solid.
Everything checks.

Irving Krutch.

Zeke, still here?

Still here.

Mr. Rivers.

What do you know about the parking on
Kirby Street in downtown Los Angeles?

Know more about it than any man alive.

Good.

Let's talk.

What's going on over there?
Will you two shut up?

Yes?

Miss McNally?

I don't take drunks.

I'm a cop.

And I'm Marilyn Monroe.

Seriously. Let me show you my badge.

Well...

I ain't hooking any more.

I know that.
That's why you just told me to go away.

That's right.
That's why I told you that.

That's why you told me that.
Here's the badge.

Your name Dorothea?

Did you know a Detective MacAvenie?

- MacAvenie?
- He was in homicide.

MacAvenie? MacAvenie?
I have this guy...

What was his first name?

Pat.

Did he have a son on the force?

No. A brother.

That's him. I know him.
I know the brother too. Oh, Pat.

Pat was...
He was one hell of a cop.

Did you know him?

Did I know him?

He was a lot of fun, wasn't he?

You'll never know.

So are you gonna leave me in the corridor
or invite me in to have a drink?

Well...

I might consider that.

So when's the last time you saw Pat?

That's a while ago now.
I'm mad at him.

Well, he's been sick.

Good.

Next time you run into him,
tell him to smarten up.

I'll do that.

I notice you got a D in front
of your name by the mailbox.

That's right.
I put D instead of Dorothea...

so that men won't come round
and bother me anymore.

Oh, that's a good idea.
OK, Dorothea.

Dorothea, do you mind if I ask you
about a photograph?

Huh?

A photograph.
Do you mind if I ask you about it?

Oh, man. You guys.

You sure know
how to bring up ancient history.

I must have posed for those pictures
years ago.

I was some little cookie in those days.

I'm not talking about a girly picture.

No? What then?

I'm talking about a picture that may have
come into your possession six years ago.

Jeez, who remembers six years ago?

What do you remember about the National
Savings and Loan hold-up six years ago?

Oh, now...

You're jumping around real fast now.

What do you remember about that hold-up?

Look, I have your word...

you're not gonna make any trouble?

You got it.

My nephew was one of the guys
that pulled that job.

What was his name?

Petey Ryan. He's dead now.

They all got k*lled on that job.

Some bank robbers.

What about the picture?

What picture?

I don't know what you're talking about.

A piece of a snapshot your nephew might
have given you before he pulled the job.

Jeez, it was six years ago.

Try and remember.

I don't even remember where I lived.

You can remember. Think.

I think better when I'm drinking.

Have you got something in the house?

Yeah, but...

that's my insurance, you know.

Here, here's .

Have a drink and later, buy a bottle.

And if I remember about the picture?

What about it?

What's it worth to you?

Two more s.

Look, you're taking up
an awful lot of my time here.

Make it three more s.

You got a deal.

You want some of this piss?
Makes you go blind, I understand.

No, thanks.

Here's looking out for your whole family.

This is...

poison. Absolute poison.

I don't remember any snapshot.

You can remember. Think.

I am thinking. Just shut up.

My nephew...

he was in and out all the time.

Who remembers?

Where do you keep your valuables?

What valuables?

Important papers. Your birth certificate,
your social security card.

Social security card.

I might have that.

Where the hell is that?

My sister dropped something off.

Do you remember a fighter,
Tiger Willis?

Willis? No.

He was a middleweight.

Yeah? What about him?

I used to live with him.

He got k*lled in the ring.

Kid from Buenos Aires k*lled him.
I was ringside.

Bobby.

That was his real name.

Bobby Willis.

That "Tiger" crap,
that was just for the ring.

Bobby always got me ringside.

Here's that thing
my sister dropped off.

There's not much here.

I don't like memories.

That's all there is.

I'm looking for something small.
Do you mind if I dump this out?

Go ahead.

Careful. Careful with that.

Is that what you want?

That's what I want.

Looks like Donald Duck.

What?

Holy jamolies!

What?

"For D McNally.
I'm in a hospital. I'm very sick.

Mikey said to send you this if it ever
looked like I was checking out.

Well, I'm checking out.
Derrick Combs."

Do you remember getting this second piece?

Honey, I don't remember
getting the first one.

That's bucks you owe me, cookie.

Baby, you got it.

All right, fellas. Here's the four pieces
we had at the beginning of the day.

Here's Krutch's piece, that's a corner piece.

Weinberg's piece, another corner piece.

Ehrbach's piece. That's our light bulb
piece which fits into Weinberg's piece.

Dillinger's piece. There's the belly dancer,
which fits into Ehrbach's piece.

And here...

courtesy of Dorothea McNally,
bless her heart...

is what we have at the end of the day.

Keep your fingers crossed.

Donald Duck.

Yes.

Yes, that fits very nicely
between Ehrbach and Krutch.

And Derrick Combs' piece,
it's another corner piece.

That inserts beautifully
between Weinberg's and Ehrbach's.

So now, what do we have?

Nothing.

Nothing.

You can't tell what in the hell it is.

Which is the top and which is the bottom?
There's no sky.

No sky.

Well, fellas, look at it this way.

Mikey Ryan had two pieces.
That's the two I got from Dorothea McNally.

My guess is each bank robber had two.
That's a total of eight.

We got six.

And tomorrow, when we get the warrant
to search Ferguson's safe...

we're gonna have seven.

One more to go?

That's my guess.

And if there's a lord above,
then we'll know where the money is.

Let's get some sleep.

Oh, Lieutenant.

Regarding Krutch's timetable,
everything fits.

Every moment is accounted for.
Mr. Krutch has an airtight alibi.

Mr. Irving Krutch.

Zeke, you still here?

Still here.

Be with you in a minute.

Been here minutes.

Without water.

How you doing?

About % done.

You find anything?

Not a thing.

Both sides of the street?

Both sides.

You'll have to have 'em
all checked out by eight o'clock.

What's the rush?

Once we get that warrant, we're close,
and that's going to be early tomorrow.

You're the boss.

When does the gallery open?

: .

Perfect.

I can't wait to see that seventh piece.

You got the warrant?

Yeah, right here.

Yesterday, she said
the piece was in the safe.

Keep your fingers crossed.

Lieutenant.

Oh, my God.

You all right?

What happened?

I must have fainted.

All right. You'll be OK.

She's dead.

What?

Dead.

What about the list?

What list?

The list of names of the people
who had pieces of the photograph.

I don't know what you're talking about.

You never heard of Derrick Combs?

No.

You never heard of Dorothea McNally?

No.

Open this.

How did you know?

Never mind.

So you were lying.

I offered him money.

Combs?

He was in the hospital. He was very sick.
He had no interest in my offer.

Did you try to get
Dorothea McNally's piece?

I was in her place...

You broke in?

Yes, but I couldn't find anything.

Did you break into Mo Weinberg's place?

I never heard of him.

Don't you read the newspapers?

Oh, you mean about his m*rder?
Yes, of course I read about his m*rder.

I thought you were referring
to my knowing him before that.

Did you k*ll Mo Weinberg?

No, I did not, Mr Brown.

Before the night of his m*rder,
I didn't know he existed.

Even though he was in the gallery several
times to inquire about the photograph?

Yes, but always using an assumed name.

Did you b*at me up?

I should say not!

Where were you at the time?

Home, in bed!

When?

The night you got b*at up.

How did you know it was at night?

Gerry told me.

Who told Gerry?

You, I would guess.

I never told her anything.

Well, then, she must have known
some other way.

Maybe she was involved
and hired someone to go to your hotel.

How do you know where it happened?

She told me.

She said two men att*cked me?

Yes, she told me the next day.

She couldn't have said two men,
because I just made that up.

- Did you go after Weinberg after?
- No!

- You walked three blocks to his room!
- No!

You k*lled him, admit it!

You att*cked me!

Yes! No! Yes!

Yes or no?

Yes or no, Mr. Kahn?

I...

I never intended to hit you.

I simply wanted to force you
to give me the piece that you had.

And then, when you opened the door,
I panicked and I...

in that split second, I...

I struck out at you.

Book him. First-degree as*ault.

Before you do that...

Whoever k*lled Gerry didn't get her piece.

That safe's been opened and it's empty.

It wasn't in the safe.

Look, I don't want to go to jail.

I know where Gerry's piece is.

Can you help me?

We can talk about it when I get the piece.

Excuse me.

Voilà.

This is a key piece.
as*ault three... days.

This is a key piece because of this car.

We know this is a road,
and this furry stuff, that's water.

This photograph was taken from above.
That's why there's no sky.

- We still don't know where the money is.
- Maybe the eighth piece has the X on it.

What's he questioning Krutch about?

My guess... my guess
because he doesn't tell me anything...

my guess is the killings.

But Krutch has airtight alibis.
During every k*lling, he's in bed with Suzie.

Lucia Lombardo,
that nice little Italian lady...

says she knows nothing about a treasure
or about giving you a list of names.

The old bag's lying,
it's as simple as that.

But maybe you are.

Why should I be? For God's sake,
I came to you with all this stuff.

I'm as anxious to locate the money
as you are.

OK, I'll ask you again.

Why would a nice old Italian lady...

who incidentally, is waiting for you
to fork over , bucks...

I'll pay her. Don't worry.
Krutch doesn't welsh.

Why would this nice old Italian lady
deny having told you...

anything about a treasure
or a list of names?

I don't know.
Go ask her, I'm telling you.

She gave me the list, the photograph,
and all the information tying it together.

She says she only gave you
a piece of the picture.

She's a liar. Sicilians are liars.

OK. I only wanna know one more thing.

What's that?

I wanna know where you were Sunday night
when Geraldine Ferguson was k*lled.

Oh, boy.
Now, why would you wanna know that?

Because maybe you decided to take
another look around the gallery...

the way you looked around
a few other people's places.

No.

No, you have got the wrong customer.

OK. So where were you?

I was in bed with Susan Endicott.

Always in bed with Susan Endicott.

Hey, wouldn't you be?

And, of course, she'll verify this?

Go ask her, I've got nothing to hide.

Let's do that.

What? She's here?

Come on.

I'm here, Lieutenant.
Been waiting minutes.

Be with you in a bit.

Is that our man?

Yeah.

What does he mean by that?

I don't know. I just say yes.
I don't wanna get in a conversation.

Hi, honey.

Hi, sweetie.

Look what I got for tonight.

Tammy Wynette. Great.

And they're front row.

Susan.

Would you mind telling me
where you were last night? Sunday night.

At the movies.

Alone?

No...

with Irving.

And where did you go after the movies?

Back to Irv's place.

Do you have your own apartment?

Yes, but on weekends
I usually like to sleep over at Irv's.

What time did you get back?

About : .

And then what did you do?

We watched TV.

And what did you do after you watched TV?

We made love.

And then?

We went to sleep.

And neither of you left the apartment
between : and am?

No. I told you.

First we watched TV and then
we made love and then we went to sleep.

And Mr. Krutch never left the apartment?

No.

If you were asleep, how would you know
if he left the apartment or not?

Well, we didn't actually go to sleep
till maybe about : .

These things take time, you know.

And Mr. Krutch never left the apartment?

No.

Did he leave the bedroom?

No. Oh, well, once.

To get me fresh orange juice.

Officer Brown.

Mr. Rivers, Miss Susan Endicott.

Mr. Rivers, Mr. Irving Krutch.

I'd like to talk to Susan alone,
so if you don't mind...

- I do mind. I don't want...
- That's all right.

Don't worry about me.
Things will be quicker this way.

See you soon.

Yeah.

You got any more of those black Crows?

Help yourself.

Oh, they're not for me.

Mr. Rivers here,
he's partial to black Crows.

I can't thank you enough.

It is my pleasure.

Miss Endicott...

you just told us about Sunday.
Now let's go back to Saturday.

Again?

On Saturday, you said that you arrived
at Mr. Krutch's apartment around one...

and you and he were together
until around seven...

and then you went out to dinner.
Is that accurate?

Yes.

And you said
that during that entire time...

Mr. Krutch never left the apartment.

Is that a fact?

Yes.

This is a parking meter.

Mr. Rivers, would you show
Miss Endicott the photograph?

As you can see, ma'am,
that meter, which is this meter...

is located in front of a rooming house
at South Kirby.

Can you see that, ma'am?

Zeke, would you now show the young
lady what you've got in the bag?

Before I forget, here's a copy of
Mr. Krutch's g*n permit that you asked for.

Yeah, but this g*n
has no bearing on our m*rder?

No. The m*rder w*apon
was a. Smith & Wesson.

Just for your edification,
Miss Endicott...

a man named Mo Weinberg was sh*t
to death at : pm on Saturday.

And this is a photograph of his body.

Why are you showing this to me?
What are you doing?

What does this have to do with me?

It has a lot to do with your future, Susan.

Bear in mind that this m*rder took place
at : pm Saturday.

We have two witnesses who will testify
to hearing two sh*ts at that time.

Miss Endicott,
that meter was emptied of all coins...

on Saturday afternoon at one o'clock.

That's these coins. They don't mean nothing.
Forget about them.

The coins on the table
were inserted into the machine...

sometime between pm and pm
on Saturday.

No coins came in after six,
because after six the parking is free.

All Saturday night and Sunday.

And these coins were taken out
of the machine early Sunday morning.

So we know that the coins
that you're looking at...

were inserted into the machine sometime
between pm and pm on Saturday.

Now, this particular coin,
the one in my hand...

same as all the other coins...

except for one thing.

It has Mr. Krutch's fingerprint on it.

A fingerprint that matches...

Mr. Krutch's fingerprint
on this g*n permit.

So we know that Mr Krutch left
the apartment sometime on Saturday...

because we know
that sometime between and pm...

he put this coin in that machine...

at South Kirby Street.

You wanna think about your story?

Mr. Krutch is gonna be arrested,
suspicion of m*rder.

You stick to your story,
you're gonna be arrested...

accessory to m*rder.

Did Mr. Krutch...

leave his apartment
at any time on Saturday?

Yes...

he left right after
you called at four o'clock.

And what time did he come back?

: .

Did Mr. Krutch leave his apartment
at any time Sunday night?

Yes...

he left at midnight
and didn't come back until three.

Grazie.

That rotten bitch.

That rotten witch.
And I don't mean Susan.

Who?

Mary Bonamico.

This is the eighth piece.

That's right.

The widow Bonamico told me she had
documents and photographic segments...

purporting to show where the money was.
I paid her $ , .

She gave me the piece
I originally gave you.

This piece?

Yes. And half the list of names.

Half the list? This half?

That's right. That half.

But that piece.

The eighth piece.

That she held back. I didn't know
that existed till a couple of months ago.

When she d*ed. I got it from her sister.

And naturally, you didn't give it to us.

Naturally.

It showed the exact location of the money,
do you think I'm an idiot?

Why did you k*ll Weinberg?

Because he had another piece
and I wanted it.

We were running a race. I knew I was
ahead cos I had the piece with the X on it.

But suppose you got cute and you
didn't wanna show me anything else.

Weinberg's piece, that was insurance.

And Gerry Ferguson's?

Same thing. Insurance.

I didn't wanna k*ll her,
but she pulled a g*n on me.

I came so close
to putting this all together.

You guys helped me more than you realise.

I came this close.

Close...

but no cigar.

Right, lift it up.

Take it easy.

Careful.

Hey, easy.

Hey, there she blows!

Do we know if there's anything in it?

We'll know in a minute, Lieutenant.

This is it! This is it!
It is all green!

Four million schmolies!

Lieutenant, you don't wanna see it?

No, I saw enough of this case.

Where are you going?

I'm going to take my dog to the park.

Toodle-oo.

"Toodle-oo"? What?

I don't know.
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