05x21 - White Trash, Holy Rollers and Punching People

Episode Transcripts for the TV show "Young Sheldon." Aired September 2017 - current.*
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It's 1989, Sheldon Cooper is nine years old, living in East Texas and going to high school after skipping 4 grade levels. Spin-off prequel to The Big Bang Theory
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05x21 - White Trash, Holy Rollers and Punching People

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on Young Sheldon...

Your brother's gonna have a baby.

Are they getting married?

It would be better for them

and better for the baby.

And better for you
so your church friends

don't get bent out of shape.

If you ever need anything, call me.

I've already been through
this with my daughter, so...

I know how to do it wrong.

[short chuckle] Thanks.

I'm worried that if he
doesn't marry this girl,

the congregation's gonna turn on me.

Hey, Joan.

I just wanted to make sure that

you knew Bible study was today.

Susan, just making
sure everything's okay,

since you're not at Bible study.

Of course. No problem.

I understand.

Hey, it's Mary.

Do you have time to talk?

For you, always.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Thank you for meeting with me.
- No problem. I got you

coffee. You seemed
upset, so, donut holes.

Which I love if you don't want them.

- I'm good with coffee.
- Okay.

So, what's going on?

Well...

...all the things that I was afraid of

are happening.

Ever since word got out about Georgie,

everyone at my Bible study canceled.

Well, first of all,
that sucks and I'm sorry.

I also can't say I'm
surprised. This is the part

of religion I don't like.

I know Georgie made a mistake,

but I thought, as Christians,
we're supposed to forgive.

Well, I'm gonna ask
you a tricky question.

If this were happening

to someone else in the congregation,

how would you respond?

[sighs]

Good choice.

That'll help.

Mm.

[indistinct chatter]

[shushing, chatter quiets down]

What's going on?

What's going on is people
are talking about my brother

behind my back instead
of saying it to my face.

She's talking about Georgie, not me.

People talk about me behind my back,

but it's about how smart I am.

I'll say it to your face.

Your brother's going to hell.

No, he's not.

Primarily because hell isn't real.

My mom said they should

kick your whole family
out of the church.

How about I kick your ass.

I'd like to see you try.

How about I help her?

How about I go get Pastor Rob?

Say one more thing about my
family and see what happens.

Y'all are white trash.

Whoa, what's going on here?

♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪

♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

Pastor Rob should be here any minute.

Maybe if he was in the classroom
when he was supposed to be,

none of this would've happened.

You can't blame him for
Missy punching someone.

If he was there to shut that kid
up, Missy wouldn't have had to.

Sunday school is no place for v*olence.

The boy's parents are very upset.

Yeah, well so am I.

Sorry I'm late.

Hi.

I'm Rob. Nice to meet you.

Wish it were under better circumstances.

Oh, that's right, you haven't met.

No. But I've seen you around.

So, shall we get to
the business at hand?

Obviously, we're...

mortified by Missy's behavior.

Even though it sounds like
that punk had it coming.

While his words were out of line,

it brings us to the bigger issue,

which is...

people are talking about Georgie.

Bunch of holy rollers with no lives.

Well, we are a tight-knit community,

and sometimes that means
what happens to one of us

affects all of us.

Whether it's their business or not.

A-As Pastor Rob helped me realize,

if I were in their shoes, I would have

been judgmental myself.

Well, it's a mess, and
something needs to be done.

I'm glad to hear you say that, because

I was thinking that maybe
you could give a sermon

reminding the congregation
what Jesus said about,

um, judgment and forgiveness.

Make it a teaching moment. I like it.

That's a way to go.

But I was thinking,

you've got a lot going on right now.

Maybe take some time off,
focus on things at home.

Hold on. Are you f*ring her?

No, no, just a little leave of absence

till things settle down.

- Is that really necessary?
- I believe it is.

As leaders of this church,

we are held to a higher standard.

Are you asking us to leave the church?

Of course not.

Y'all talk a big game
about community, and then

you just turn your back when
things get a little messy.

Okay, let's just take a breath.

You do that. We're
leaving. Come on, Mary.

George, let's talk this through.

I've heard enough.

I'll be in the truck.

There must be another way.

It's all right. I'll, um...

...clean out my office.

[TV playing indistinctly]

Movies lie. Punching people hurts.

Try being the punchee.

[door opens, closes]

What happened to you?

Nothing.

She punched a boy in the
face at Sunday school.

Why?

He was saying crap about our family.

Is this about me and Mandy?

Yeah.

You can't go around hitting people.

I had to do something.

Me too. What did you do?

I ran and told the nearest adult.

I don't want you getting
in trouble for me.

But Danny says you're going to hell.

I'm there now.

Promise me.

Fine.

And I know you ain't hitting nobody.

You are correct, sir.

[doorbell rings]

Can we talk?

Of course. Come in.

So, I told my folks about the baby.

And?

They told me I'm on my own.

They want nothing to do with me.

Sorry.

Give it a minute, they
still might come around.

I didn't even get to the part
where the father's years old.

Something fun for next time.

[TV playing indistinctly]

Just join a new church, Mary.

We're not joining another church.

Seriously? After what
we just went through,

you want to go back there?

I don't know.

If we're switching religions,
may I recommend Judaism.

Why?

Both William Shatner and
Leonard Nimoy are Jewish.

So?

Isn't that enough?

When Mary told me she was pregnant,

I reacted pretty much the
same way that your folks did.

Not my finest moment.

Let me guess, they got married

- and suddenly you were okay with it.
- Hell no.

I didn't want my daughter to marry

that fat dumbass.

I shouldn't have said that.

- He got fat later.
- I'd laugh,

but my mom gained pounds

- when she had my little brother.
- [chortles]

But I'll tell you something.

Georgie's gonna be there for you,

whether you like it or not.

You may not know, but your
feet are gonna swell up.

And your boobs. I'll rub
whatever you need rubbed.

I'm getting that impression.

[TV playing indistinctly]

What are you doing?

- Go to your room.
- She's fine, Mary.

She needs to be punished.

For what... sticking up for us?

She punched a boy in church.

I'll just go to my room.

Hey, don't you move.
What are you watching?

- MTV.
- Watch MTV.

- George.
- I'm not punishing

her for doing the right thing.

v*olence is never the right thing.

I'm sorry, are we in California?

Ugh!

Turn that off.

So, you really think
my folks'll come around?

I don't know 'em,

but babies have a
magical power over people,

especially grandparents.

Is that how you felt
when Georgie was born?

Oh, it was love at first sight.

And then years later
he got me pregnant.

You're not gonna let that go, are you?

- Nope.
- Hmm.

Should you really be
reading in the car, baby?

- I'll be fine.
- You sure?

You're not the one who'll have to

clean up the oatmeal back there.

I said I'll be fine.

And it's the blueberries
you should be worried about.

Well, you're in a mood.

Maybe because there was so
much bickering going on at home

that I couldn't study.

Oh, I'm sorry if our family problems

are getting in the
way of your schoolwork.

I accept your apology.

- [retches]
- Oh...

SHELDON: Yep, blueberries.

Where you going?

I got stuff to do.

Like what?

Just stuff.

Well, can you stop and
get me something to eat?

- No.
- Why not?

'Cause I got stuff to do.

Which you won't tell me.

'Cause it's none of your damn business.

Is it illegal?

I'm not gonna play this
game with you, Georgie.

Just give me the first letter.

Goodbye.

[door opens]

Please, leave.



These people are so lost.

[doorbell rings]

Just a minute!

Oh! [coughs]

Uh, Pastor Rob.

[short chuckle] You okay?

Um... swallowed a Tic Tac.

- [coughs]
- Well, I can

barely smell the smoke at all.

- [chuckles softly]
- What are you doing here?

I just didn't like the way
things went down the other day,

and I came to check on you.

Aren't you kind.

Can I come in?

Oh, yeah, of course.

[coughs]

[indistinct conversations]

Okay...

marital status.

Single.

Mind your own business.

Name of father.

I can't write "Georgie,"
it sounds like he's .

George Marshall Cooper.

Marshall? I didn't know that.

Isn't it nice he can still surprise you?

[chuckles]

Payment method.

Don't see an option for "bad check."

You don't have health insurance?

I don't even have car insurance.

How do you drive without car insurance?

Slowly.

Don't worry about the money. I got you.

I can't ask you to do that.

You're not asking, I'm offering.

Thank you.

I knew it.

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

I asked her to be here.

So, her and not me?

Yeah.

Don't make me come over there.

How did you follow me?

Wasn't hard. You can see that

yellow Toyota from outer space.

It is a Mazda.

This is my baby, too.

I think I should be a part of this.

You did your part, now git.

Mandy, please. I want to help.


He can stay.

Thanks.

What can I do?

Nothing.

I can do that.

ADULT SHELDON: I was struggling
to focus and needed help.

Luckily, there was someone on campus

I could always count on
to lend a friendly ear.

A second mom, if you will.

What now?

You said if I ever had a problem,

I could come to you and you'd fix it.

When did I say that?

September th, .

You had just eaten a poppyseed bagel

and had one stuck in your teeth.

I'll take your word for it.

It was right here. How did it not

make you crazy? It made me crazy.

What do you want?

My family's falling apart.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Uh...

what do you want me to do?

Fix it.

I just can't believe the
church turned its back on us.

The church may have, but God didn't.

I don't feel His presence right now.

Well, let's invite Him to join us.

Oh, ok-okay.

Heavenly Father, we
ask for Your guidance

in these troubled times. Please,

watch over Mary Cooper

and her family,

let her know that though
this unborn child is

out of wedlock, he or she is a miracle

in Your creation and should
be celebrated as such.

Amen.

Amen.

- What's going on here?
- Uh, uh, praying,

- we're praying.
- Just praying.

- [door closes]
- Why aren't you in school?

You told me not to punch
anyone else, so I left.

Well...

go to your room.

I should probably go.

Uh, of course. Um...

thank you for stopping by.

Of course. Thank you
for the tea and, uh...

- MARY: Bye.
- [door closes]

Mm-hmm.

[door opens]

Mandy, the doctor'll see you now.

Where do you think you're going?

Going to see the doctor.

Not you.

- Why not me? I'm the dad.
- Georgie,

please don't cause a scene.

All right.

I'll wait here for you.

I'm the dad.

PETERSON: I know I'm opening myself up

for cheap sh*ts, but

I'm thinking about getting a rug.

Oh, they're called hair systems now.

My brother just got one.

He went from bald to
Rick James like that.

I'm just trying to get back out there

with the ladies. Wouldn't
hurt having something up here,

- you know, for them to hold on to.
- Good for you.

Although the right gal wouldn't care.

Says the man who doesn't have
to put sunblock on his head.

Hey, you heard from George today?

George. Cooper? No.

- You?
- No.

Hoping that he would join us.

Well, he's going through
a tough time at home,

you got to cut him a little slack.

Are you done?

I don't know. What do you think?

- I can keep going.
- Me too.

You ever wonder how that Sheldon
kid wound up being so smart?

Oh, you mean like was there
a genius pizza delivery guy

or mailman in the mix?

- Exactly.
- All right, that's enough.

And for the record, my
grandfather was a brilliant man.

Co-invented the traffic cone.

Used to be wood, he made it rubber.

That's right.

- Where you going?
- Home.

This was fun, let's
do it again sometime.

Kiss my ass.

Think we cheered him up?

Oh, yeah.

I'm hoping for a boy, but
as long as it's healthy,

that's all that matters.

What are y'all having?

[sighs]

Hey.

Hey.

- [door closes]
- How was your day?

Swell. You?

Oh, you know,

a little boring not
having work to go to.

[short chuckle] Yeah, well, I'll trade you.

Oh, Pastor Rob dropped by.

Why?

Just seeing how we were doing.

You mean to see how you were doing.

[sighs]

- What's that supposed to mean?
- Come on, Mary, you...

you're not fooling anybody.

We were just praying.

GEORGE SR.: Is that
what we're calling it?

MARY: Yes, because that's what it was.

GEORGE SR.: All right.

I've had enough of this.

- Where are you going? I'm making dinner.
- [phone ringing]

Yeah, well, maybe Pastor Rob'll eat it.

George!

Hello?

Mrs. Cooper, it's Linda Hagemeyer.

Is everything okay?

Well, I was hoping

that you could tell me. [chuckles]

Uh, Sheldon was in my office earlier

and was pretty upset about
the situation at home.

What did he tell you?

Nothing much, really, just

that his parents are
fighting all the time,

his older brother got a girl pregnant

and his sister punched a little boy

in Sunday school.

Oh. Well...

...it's been a busy couple of days.

Just, you know, life...
One thing after another.

Oh, ain't that the truth.

Anyway, I'm sure

that you know this university
has invested quite a bit

in Sheldon's progress, and, uh, well,

not to be critical, but...

he didn't come to you
complaining about me.

What are you saying?

Are you saying that I'm not

doing a good job as his mother?

Because I am

doing the best that I can
to hold this family together,

and I am tired of everyone blaming me.

I have half a mind to get
in my car and drive until

I run out of road and then
start my life over again

with a different name.

Okay. Sure.

So, uh...

sounds like you've got a handle on this.

So good to talk to you.
Um, have a lovely evening.

You too!

[crying]

Oh...

[sniffles]

It's okay.

Where's Dad?

Well...

He had to work late.

Georgie, how was your day?

Pretty good, actually.

Me and Mandy went to the baby doctor.

She actually wanted you there?

Not at first, but I wore her down.

Let's say grace.

Hang on, safety first.

When are you gonna get over that?

I would think recent events
would make you value protection.

Enough.

Bless us, Lord, for the food we are

about to receive and bless
the hands that prepared it.

And bless Mom.

Thank you. Amen.

- Amen.
- GEORGE JR.: Amen.

She's the hands that prepared it.

Your blessing is redundant.

Let's eat.
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