07x07 - The Color of Monkey

[bunniefuu]

Ben: Mmm, Mmm,

Rook: I am surprised to see this establishment thriving,

The possession and consumption of Tiffin is banned in systems,

Ben: Mm, Relax, Rook,

It's Tiffin [gulps] flavored,

Rook: But are not Tiffins the offspring of the Lewodan?

How could you eat something like that?

Ben: Mmm, I said it's Tiffin-flavored, as in "artificial,"

It's not actually Lewodan babies, Mmm,

Rook: Oh, Well, that is different,

Mmm,

Mmm,

And delicious!

Have you seen our baby?

[grumbles]

H-have you seen our baby?

[chuckles]

[squawks] Nobody gets any funny ideas and nobody gets hurt!

But this really hurts!

No, it doesn't,

[squawks] Crikey! It's Tennyson!

Ben: Wait a minute,

They forgot my chocolate,,, sauce, Liam?!

Rook: Suemungousaur, put the citizen down and put your hands over your head,

You got it, Whoa!

Rook: What? [grunts]

Ben: All right, suemungousaur, meet,,,

Buzzshock: Buzzshock!

[giggling]

Shoo, fly,

Buzzshock: [giggling]

Take this, Redspot!

[squawks] Huh?

Stand down, criminals,

Very nice, Very, very nice, boys,

Ben: We're not your boys, Argit,

It ain't always about you, Benjamin,

This establishment is under the protection of Argistix Security Incorporated,

I'd suggest you surrender,

♪ Ben ♪

♪ He's a kid, and he wants to have fun ♪

♪ But when you need a superhero, he gets the job done ♪

♪ Ben ♪ ♪ With a device that he wears on his arm ♪

♪ He can change his shape and save the world from harm ♪

♪ When trouble's taking place ♪

♪ he gets right in its face ♪ ♪ Ben ♪

♪ When lives are on the line ♪ ♪ it's hero time ♪

♪ Ben ♪

Do you have items of the greatest value that need to be

transported from here,,, to here?

Are you in need of protective services for your establishments?

Well, look no further than,,,

Argistix Security,

With Argistix, "x" marks the spot against crime, thievery, and,,,

[woman screams]

,,,pilfering,

♪ Just call Argistix Security ♪

♪ We keep nogoodniks and jerks at bay! ♪

[tink!]

Thank you,

Ben: [laughing]

One more time!

Max: Ben, you've watched it times,

Ben: But, Grandpa, it's priceless,

And I don't mean the $ , two-for-one deal, Rook,

I mean, he's trying to sell himself as a security expert,

Who's he trying to fool?

Max: I don't know, Ben,

but you're right to be suspicious,

Based off his previous track record and my gut, Argit is up to no good,

I wouldn't trust him with my mother's dentures,

Rook: I cannot imagine why anyone would trust him with their dentures,

[elevator beeps]

Delivery intermediation -- Argistix Securities,

Query for misters Blukic and Driba,

Blukic: Ooh! Driba: That's us!

Only one valid digit print is required,

Driba: Well, you signed last time,

Blukic: No, you signed last time,

Driba: Excuse me, but,,,

What? We've been using Argistix for weeks,

Blukic: And we've never had better service,

Driba: [grunts]

Max: Yeah, I don't like this,

Ben: Neither do I,

Let's go fishing,

I mean let's go check out Argistix,

Rook: [laughing] oh, good,

I did not see how a fishing expedition

would help us discover Argit's ulterior motives,

What exactly are we looking for?

Ben: I don't know,

Anything,,,unusual,

Rook: Does Simian qualify as unusual?

Ben: Highly,

What are you doing here, Simian?

Ben Tennyson!

Welcome to Argistix Security, [hooting]

Is there something of great importance that you need transported?

Ben: You mean you work here?

I do, In fact, you are looking at the head [hoots] of security,

Ben: Argit running a security company?

Simian working for him?

It's like a Russian nesting doll of shams,

Rook: I do not know what that means, but it does not sound good,

Look, I know you're skeptical, but I'm on the up-and-up, I swear,

[hooting]

It's true, Benny boy,

Ben: Oh, come on, Argit,

who do you think you're talking to?

I am doing my level best to keep up my good image,

Thusly, I am running a legit business,

Rook: Then you need legitimate employees,

In my experience, Simian is anything but,

Hey, I'm an equal-opportunity employer,

And while, yes, we were both

former con men looking out only for our best interests,

who doesn't love a story of redemption?

Not to mention, he was the only one who answered the want ad,

Ben: Fine, Let's just see how long you can keep up this "legitimate business,"

Speaking of, I must get to work,

These trucks don't run themselves,

Techadons [hoots] load up!

[vehicle departs]

Just watching that fella making good warms my cockles,

How about yours?

Ben: Nope,

What the --

Whoa!

Rojo: Next time, keep your grubby mitts off my hot wings,

[communicator beeps]

Rojo here, Yeah? Where?

How much?

[chuckles]

Unh-unh,

%?

Did you call to hire me or insult me?

[both gasp] [chatters]

Ben: That came from the black hole,

Hey, o-one of my trucks is headed right into that area!

Number two, alley-oop!

Um [hoots] yes -- yes, sir, Mr, Argit,

Rook: I suppose we should follow them,

Ben: Let's go,

Rojo: Hello?

Are you even there?

Look, it's % or nothing,

Better decide now,

[vehicle approaching]

[tires squeal]

Forget it, It's here, We'll haggle later,

[g*n cocks]

[tires screech]

Ben: Rojo, Been a while,

Rook: I do not know you, but can I assume you are up to no good?

Ben: Hey! I said, "hold it!"

Rook: No, you did not,

What are you waitin' for?

Go help your partner save my truck!

Ben: Don't rush me, Argit,

[beep] I'm doing you a favor, here,

Frankenstrike: [grunts] Just don't ask me why,

[grunting]

We don't need his help, boss,

Our security bots can handle this,

Yeah, Well, we'll see about that,

Rook: Madam, I do not wish to harm you,

Rojo: Don't you worry about me,

And don't call me "madam,"

[engine revs]

[grunts]

Rook: Please, pull over,,, or down,

Rojo: How about you get off?!

Stand down, criminal,

Frankenstrike: Hey, I'm on your side!

Fine, if you won't listen,,,

strike one,

Strike two,

[grunts]

Strike three!

[beeping]

Ben: I'm out,

Ben: Wait, wait, wait! Same team! Good guys!

T-don, stand down!

Friend, n-not foe!

Compliance,

Ben: Whoa, Thanks, Argit,

Hold it,

Benny, my truck!

Ben: Yeah, I'm on it,

Let's see, Diamondhead, four arms,

I can't watch, I just hope Benny's able to protect our considerable

investments from that hoodlum,

Oh, yes, sir, Me too,

[beep]

Ben: Humungousaur! [omnitrix powers down]

Aah!

Rojo: It's been real fun, but I got a job to finish,

Ben: Oh, no, you don't,

Aw, come on!

Rojo: What?

[growls]

[hooting] What did I do?

Rojo: [snarls]

[chatters]

Rook: [grunts]

Ben: [sighs] Sorry, Argit, I thought we had her,

Rook: Yes, but it looks as if she is leaving empty-handed,

Thanks to you guys,

Hey, Benny, I owe you one,

Yes, yes,

We can't thank you enough,

Next delivery is on the house,

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

Let's not get crazy,

Half off,

Ben: Yeah, I'll pass,

Mm, mmm,

Seriously, this is amazing,

Mmm, Mr, Smoothy's should make a Tiffin-flavored smoothie!

Rook: Mm, mm, mmm,

I cannot believe it is not Tiffin,

Ben: Mmm,

Rook: It is curious that there was nothing in the security truck,

Ben: Mm,

Rook: After all, Argit was making a large deal about keeping it safe,

Ben: He really did make a big deal about it,

He must have left it empty for a reason,

Rook: I feel that we are "being played," as you say,

Ben: We just need to get one step ahead,

We need to outthink him,

[groans]

Rook: Do not hurt yourself,

Ben: [straining] No! Brain freeze!

Simian, my friend,,,

you seem, uh, a little antsy,

Antsy? You know, freakin', buggin', weirded out,

No, no, no, Oh, no,

I-I'm just, u-uh, perplexed,

We are transporters of important items, are we not?

We are,

So, in that truck, there should have been an item of importance,

Hmm, Yeah, that is,,,perplexing,

As president of Argistix, I must keep my hands very clean,

and this item here is less than squeaky,

I also don't recall asking you to transport it anywhere,

[hooting]

Well, as your number two, I thought you might appreciate my taking some initiative,

After all, you did hire me to deliver Argistix's more prohibitive items,

[hooting]

I did, but when your initiative trips up my plans,

there's gonna be trouble in paradise,

[hooting] I-I-I didn't mean any trouble,

But with artificial Tiffin all

the rage in bellwood right now

[hooting] that thing's price has tripled,

While this is true, you are to deliver said items when and

where I direct you to deliver them!

[hooting] Of course,

Not on your own initiative!

Noted, [hoots softly]

Good, I am now entrusting you to

deliver this prohibitive item

exactly where it's supposed to go,

No mistakes, No mishaps,

No monkeying around,

Understood?

"No monkeying around,"

[hooting] Ugh, condescending little rodent,

Oh, I'll get this item exactly where it's supposed to go,

Rojo: So, you got it this time, chimp?

The package is inside the Techadon,

You'll need to break through his armor to get it,

Rojo: It's not gonna att*ck me or anything, is it?

Hey, tin can, stand still for her [hoots] huh?

Compliance,

One more thing, In order to make this look like

an actual mugging, you'll also need to rough me up a bit,

Just not in the -- ooh!

,,,face,

[grunts]

Con men are so untrustworthy,

[speed-dialing, ringing]

Plumber hotline,

Yeah, I'd like to make one of them anonymous tips about an

illegal crime being perpetrated,

[whimpering]

Rojo: [grunting]

Quiet, you big baby,

I didn't hit you that hard,

[siren blares]

Ben: Put down the w*apon, Rojo!

Rojo: Why should I? I got what I wanted,

[engine revs]

Rook: The alley is too narrow,

Ben: Unload the tennspeed,

[engine revs, tires squeal]

Never bring a truck to a bike chase,

Rook: I admit, bringing your motorcycle was a wise choice,

Ben: Dang straight, Now let's get that box,

[engine revs]

[engine revs]

Aah!

Rojo: Hands off, blue boy,

So long, losers,

Rook: Perhaps we need the proto-truk after all,

Ben: She's not the only one who can fly,

Come on, stinkfly,

[beeping]

Heck, I'll even take jetray,

Upgrade: Upgrade?

Rook: Cannot fly, and the tennspeed, while

technologically advanced, also does not have the capability of flight,

Upgrade: Yeah, thanks for the update,

Update nothing -- how about an upgrade!

[engine revs]

[engine revs]

[tires squeal]

Rook: I greatly approve of this,

Upgrade: Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Rojo: Come on, caballo,

Your horsepower can outfly these yahoos,

[horn honks]

[horns honking]

Upgrade: Ready? Rook: Yes,

Rojo: [laughs] Nice try, boys!

Rook: Give up, Rojo,

Upgrade: Yeah, you bad guys never win, anyway,

Rojo: Oh, well, see, I'm a bad girl!

[horn honks]

Rook: Ben, ramming speed! Upgrade: Are you crazy?

I am the bike, I'd really prefer not smashing into things,

It actually does hurt!

Rook: Just do it!

Rojo: [laughs] Chicken!

[engine revs]

Upgrade: Rook? Rook: Steady,

[beeping]

Ben: Ah! My leg!

Ow, Ow, ow, Ow,

Benny, you are not easy to catch up to,

Now, if you could just hand over that little --

Rojo: It's mine!

Ben: Oh, I'm sorry, Did you want this?

[groans]

Rojo: Thanks, kid,

Max: Hold it right there, Rojo,

You are under arrest for smuggling, as*ault, and all-around mayhem,

Rojo: Okay, wait, I, uh,,,

Max: Where do you think you're going, Simian?

Back to Argistix Security, of course -- my place of very lawful employment,

Max: Interesting, 'cause according to a very strange anonymous tip,

we know that you're the brains behind a secret smuggling ring

running out of Argistix Security,

[gasps] What?

There was a secret smuggling ring at my place of business?

Simian, how could you?

A-a-and after I gave you a chance at redemption!

But -- but --

Could you give us a minute, fellas?

So, this was all a setup?

I was going to be a patsy for your smuggling ring all along?

Hey, hey, hey, hey, ixnay on the smuggling-ay,

But, yes, I set you up,

I wouldn't have if you had played by my rules,

I hired you because I knew you were no good,

And while I love a good nogoodnik, a con should never try and con another con,

Don't think you're gonna get away with this, Argit,

I'm going to tell them, Ooh!

That's fine, Take a rest,

He's all yours, boys,

Ben: I'll take that,

Property of Argistix Security,

Thanks, Benno,

Ben: The least I could do for a fellow hero,

Though if I was dealing with someone as shady as Simian,

I'd have done something really smooth and mixed up the boxes,

giving him something artificial instead,

Did you knock a few of your marbles loose in that last fight, there, kid?

Maybe you should go get some rest,

Ben: Yeah, maybe you're right,

Rook: Care for an "ar-Tiffin-cially"

Tiffin-flavored Mr, smoothy smoothie?

Ben: Don't mind if I do,

[slurps]

Oh, one last thing, Argit,

What's in the box?

Sorry, Benny, No can tell,

One thing we take very seriously at Argistix Security is client confidentiality,

Ben: Eh, fair enough,

And I got to say, I really respect your ethics, legitimate businessman Argit,

[slurps]

Hand it over,

I got to tell you, with the popularity of this product here

in Bellwood, this item was not easily procured,

I accept all universal forms of payment,

Is this a joke?

I had it, I swear!

I've been set up! I-I-I-I don't understand!

Hmm,

Ben: Though if I was dealing with someone as shady as

Simian, I'd have done something really smooth and mixed up the

boxes, giving him something artificial instead,

Well played, Benny,

Boys!

[roars]

Ben: Here you go, courtesy of Argistix Securities,

Oh! [squeaking]

Oh, my dear child,

Oh, thank you, Ben Tennyson,

Thank you,