07x23 - You Don't Know Sponge/Tunnel of Glove

[bunniefuu]

- Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

- I can't hear you.

Aye, aye, Captain!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants! - Ready?

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

Spongebob Squarepants!

- Spongebob

Squarepants!

- Can you two be quiet?

Didn't think so.

What are you barnacle-heads doing, anyway?

- Patrick and I are practicing our favorite noises.

Mine is a dolphin, laughing.

- And my favorite

is the plaintive song of the blue whale.

Did you hear that?

- What's wrong, frank?

- That song, it sounds just like Martha.

- Frank, how many times do I have to tell you?

Martha's no good for you.

She's just no good!

- Why would you want to practice such horrible sounds?

- It's one of the activities in our favorite magazine,

a ton of simple things to do.

- Must be very mentally challenging for you.

- Oh, it is.

- Yeah, it made me look more smartlike.

What does the magazine say we should do next?

- Well, let's take a look.

I think we've done everything in this issue.

Except for this one!

The best friend quiz.

Do you really know your best friend?

Oh, this should be easy?

Patrick and I know everything about each other.

- Well, you two have fun

with your mutual ignoramus society.

- Bye! - Bye, Squidward.

- Morons.

Bye again!

- You go first, Patrick.

- Oh, no. After you, old buddy.

- Au contraire.

After you, mon ami.

- Please, after you, pal.

- No, no, no, no, no.

After you, bestest--

clang!

- Just pick one!

And there's another three where that came from!

- I'll go first.

What is your best friend's favorite color?

Hmm, i'm thinking...

Aquamarine.

- I hate to burst your bubble,

but my favorite color is...

It is aquamarine.

Sorry I doubted you.

- No problem.

Is your best friend right- or left-handed?

The answer is... right-handed.

- How did you know?

- Simple, Patrick.

It's because you're my best friend.

- Awww.

- Is your best friend's bellybutton

and inny or an outy?

No peeking!

- Haha, no need to peek, Patrick.

I can do this with my eyes closed.

You have...

What will his answer be?

- The suspense is k*lling me.

- An inny.

- Well, let's just check that theory.

An inny!

Wow!

How does he do it?

- Magic.

- Oh, my turn!

But give me some hard questions,

not like those softballs you answered.

Okay, first question:

What is your best friend's favorite color?

- Aw, man!

Pulling out the big g*ns.

Oh, color...Color...

No hints!

Blue!

No!

Clear!

No!

Oh, that's not it!

Hold on. Hold on.

!

- The answer is...

Beige.

- Oh, barnacles!

Oh, I was so close.

Is your best friend left-handed or right-handed?

- Oh, tricky, tricky.

Hmm, right...Or...Left.

Right-handed!

- Sorry, Patrick.

I'm ambidextrous!

- Oh, fish paste!

Does your best friend

have an inny or an outy bellybutton?

- Bellybutton, huh?

An inny!

- Sorry, Patrick.

I have an outy.

- Tarter sauce!

- Well, i'm sure you'll get the next one right.

What is your best friend's favorite food?

- Uhhhh.

I remember!

Heh, your favorite food is a chum burger!

- Eh, no.

- I thought for sure I had that one.

- Okay, let's try an easy one.

Is your best friend a boy or a girl?

- Ooh.

That's a toughy.

Rugged biceps.

Yet, delicate eyelashes.

Pass.

- Ahem, last question.

- Oh-ho-ho. This is for the win!

- What shape is your best friend?

I got this one!

Um...uh...

Can you repeat the question?

- What shape is your best friend

Spongebob Squarepants?

- Round. Flat.

Uh, hexagon.

- Squarepants.

It's right on the tip of my tongue.

- Five seconds.

- Dah! Um, um...

Oh, jeez. Trapezoid.

Uh, Pentagon. Amorphous.

- Time's up! - Triangle!

- I... no.

- Idiots wrecking my boat.

So... who won your stupid quiz?

- It was a tie.

- Well, it wasn't a tie,

but we had lots of fun.

- Let me see that.

A triangle?

Ha ha!

Patrick didn't know anything about you.

And he's supposed to be your best friend?

- I know.

It's like we're not friends at all.

- Now, now, Patrick may not have passed the quiz,

but like a true best friend,

he's always right here for me, right, Patrick?

Patrick?

- Ice cream!

- Looks like your best friend

isn't a friend at all.

- Hey, Spongebob!

I got you an ice cream!

- Thank you, best friend Patrick.

- It's your favorite,

dill pickle swirl with mustard and extra bacon bits.

- Patrick, this is your favorite ice cream.

My favorite is plain vanilla.

Right.

Well, more ice cream for me.

Oh, ooh, can I borrow five bucks?

- Here!

Take your dirty, rotten money!

I Don't even know you anymore!

- Eh, what's with him?

- I guess he didn't want any ice cream.

- It just isn't fair.

Who needs Patrick, anyways?

Rest of my life, here I come.

- Oh, hey, there, Spongebob!

- Be strong, be strong, be strong, be strong.

Good afternoon, Mr. Star.

Hmph.

- See ya later.

Oh, Sandy!

It was awful!

Truly awful!

We were like complete strangers.

- You Don't need to know everything

about your best friend.

That's what keeps the friendship interesting.

- Really?

- Maybe you and Patrick

just need some time apart.

- Yeah.

I'll have lots of fun without Patrick.

- What a crybaby.

- I Don't need Patrick.

I can have a good time all by myself.

Ooh! I could go jellyfishing.

Patrick and I used to go jellyfishing.

I could play leap frog!

I could blow bubbles!

Uh, maybe not.

- Oh, that's Patrick!

- I can't let him see me.

- Well, he doesn't seem to be missing me at all.

- Nice that he's gotten over our friendship so quickly.

- Patrick works out at the gym?

And he's hanging out with Larry the lobster?

Maybe I Don't know much about Patrick either.

- Patrick shopping for cookery?

Very suspicious.

He's coming back.

Hold it right there, Patrick.

- Hi, Spongebob.

- We were just coming to see you.

- Oh, i'll be you were...

To tell me about your new best friend Larry, I suppose?

- Whoa, settle down, little dude.

I Don't to get in the middle of whatever....This is.

- While Larry is a great guy

with loads of talent and good looks...

- I know. He is pretty amazing.

- He's not my best friend.

He was just helping me buy a present?

- Who for? Sandy?

- No, for my real best friend Spongebob Squarepants.

- Really? For me?

What is it?

I love it.

You do know me, best friend.

- I got a pair for me too!

- Oh, you're the bestest best friend, Patrick!

How do I look?

How should I know, mysterious stranger?

Aahhhh!

- Why me?

- Pearl, come on!

The line for tunnel of glove is filling up.

This is gonna be so totally, like, fun!

- Hey, Pearl.

- Barnacles.

Spongebob, why are you talking to me?

- Is that your boyfriend?

- Well, I am a boy.

And I am her friend.

- Spongebob, stand here for a second.

- Just thought we should keep this moment for posterity.

Pearl's got a boyfriend!

Pearl's got a boyfriend!

- I didn't know you had a girlfriend.

- Quiet! He is not my boyfriend!

- Well, that was fast.

Don't worry, buddy.

There's plenty of fish in the streetcar.

- Anyway, let's go to the ride.

- Bye, Pearl.

Tell Mister Krabs I said, "hi!"

Let's bounce, Patrick.

Patrick?

- Busy. I'll catch up with you later.

- Please remain seated till the boat comes to--

- next.

- Come on, Pearl.

- Sorry.

Only two per car.

You'll have to wait for the next car.

Any single riders, come to the front.

I'm a single rider!

Excuse me. Pardon me. Excuse me. Pardon me.

Excuse me. Pardon me.

After you, fellow single rider Pearl.

- Please keep your arms and legs inside at all times,

and do not leave the boat until the ride is over.

Thank you.

- Um, Pearl? Your arm.

It's outside the boat.

- Ugh, I will put my arm in the boat.

But Don't touch me.

Don't talk to me.

Don't even look at me!

Boring!

- Will my arrow find her heart?

This ride is lame!

Hey, you're allowed to speak now.

I bet Mister Krabs would get a kick out of this ride.

Don't you think?

I mean, he's so tough on the outside,

but he's got a soft side too.

You know, this one time I was upset

because my snail Gary, he was sick,

and he let me leave five minutes early.

Isn't that he sweetest thing you've ever heard?

Bla-blah-bla-bla-blah! Bla-bla-blah bla-blah!

- And then there was that time that Mister Krabs yelled at me

for getting to work before he did,

and he didn't even dock my pay.

What a sweet man.

- Dah!

You are making this ride even more boring,

if such a thing is possible.

- You're supposed to remain seated

until the ride comes to a complee-ee-eet!

Stop.

- What was that?

- Attention sweethearts.

We are experiencing technical difficulties.

Please remain seated.

- Oh, great. Just great.

- Breaking news.

The tunnel of glove

has turned into a tunnel of terror.

Just hours ago,

the mechanism that controls the boats

mysteriously stopped,

trapping the doomed couple inside.

We have the youths' friend here,

who escaped the tunnel

before tragedy befell the two sweethearts.

- It's true!

We barely escaped with our lives!

It was horrible!

- And what was the name of your friend?

- Pearl... and her boyfriend Spongebob.

- So there you have it.

As time quickly runs out,

still no word from the imperiled whale girl

and Spongebob.

- Oh, no!

I'm out of coral on a stick!

Time to chomp through the fried barnacles.

- At this time, survival looks bleak

for the little yellow sponge.

- No!

This is my worst nightmare!

I Don't have a drink!

- Hey! Doofus!

- Your best buddy is trapped in the tunnel of glove

and he may never escape.

- You mean Spongebob?

I'm coming, Spongebob!

- Hold it. No one beyond this point.

- My best buddy is trapped in there.

You got to let me through.

- No can do, big guy.

Too dangerous.

- Fine.

Well, Mr. Police guy won't let me in the front, huh?

Well, i'll just have to find my own way in.

Let's see.

Where could Spongebob be?

Aha!

"Congratulations.

"You have fou...Found...

Your friend"!

Spongebob is right behind this door!

I'm coming to get you, buddy!

Spongebob? Where--

well, there you are.

Hang in there.

I'll free you from your shackles.

You're okay now, buddy.

Go to your happy place.

- Bah! - Ah!

- Don't worry, little girl.

We're working as fast as we can.

- That wasn't me.

That was Spongebob.

- Thank you, little boy.

- Don't fret, Pearl.

It's just the dark.

Nothing scary about the dark.

It's what's in the dark you got to watch out for.

Monsters, creeps, ghouls,

clowns,

witches, werewolves,

clowns,

crawly things, crawly clowns.

Those are the worst!

The crawly clowns!

- Well, whatever, Spongebob.

I'm gonna find my way out.

- Pearl, I wouldn't do that.

You're not keeping your arms and legs inside the boat!

Pearl, wait.

I should probably accompany you,

you know, in case...

There's anything in the darkness, lurking.

- Fine.

After you.

- Okay, i'll just fearlessly lead the way.

Snakes!

- Those are streamers, fool!

- Bah! Ah.

Maybe i'll just stay up here,

keep an eye out for any other creepies.

- Oh, grow up, Spongebob.

There aren't any creepies.

There aren't any crawlies.

There aren't any snakes.

So stop whining so we can look for a way out of here!

- Okay, Pearl, you've made you point.

I'll stop talking about ogres and vampire bat fish...

And sharks and...

- Spongebob!

- And I won't talk about... zombies!

Ayegh!

- Spongebob!

- Or ghostly pirates!

Or laboratory creatures.

- Spongebob!

- Or green beings from another planet.

- Okay, Spongebob! Okay!

- Or bus drivers.

- Agh! That's enough!

- Shh! Did you hear that?

- Now i'm scared, Spongebob.

- It sounded like a crawly wereclown.

- But there's no such thing!

- Oh, he's here.

Ooh!

Ahh!

- Ha ha. Neegh.

- Not another skunk.

How did you b*at me again?

Hey, you, you find it funny to lock up my friend?

Hey, I am talking towards you!

- Did you see the dimwit who ripped this apart?

- I unfortunately have no idea who that dullard is.

I do know that you kidnapped Spongebob.

- Yeah, I Don't know about your friend.

I'm just the electrician.

- Whoa.

I see you area magician.

But that voodoo does not erase what you've done.

- You need to relax.

Have a seat and cool off.

- Jeez, some people are so pushy.

- Just Don't sit on... the lever!

Now the ride is stuck

in dangerous super fast mode.

- You told me to sit on it.

- What's that sound? - I Don't know.

Hold me, Spongebob!

Hey! The hall of great romance.

- Okay, okay, I think I heard you.

I will not sit on anything else.

I'll just gingerly lean on this wall.

- Noooooo!

- Wow, how romantical.

- P'shh! I imagined it bigger.

- Look, Pearl!

A sweet, adorable cherub.

Pearl, I Don't think this is the tunnel of glove.

It's the tunnel of evil!

- Jeez, Pearl.

- Gosh, stupid kid.

- Hey-ya!

Nice facilities.

Great water pressure.

- Neptune's mother!

- What's that noise?

- Rargh!

- She's gonna blow!

Nooo!

- Ha...

I guess that turned out to be...

Kind of fun.

- Hehe, yeah.

- Spongebob isyour boyfriend.

- Ew!

How many times do I have to say it?

Ewww!

Gross.

- Oh, Don't deny it.

You were totally hugging him.

And everyone knows that totally means

he's totally your boyfriend!

Howdy, kids!

Crawly clown!

Crawly clown!

You understand, girls.

For posterity.

- You gonna finish that?