17x05 - All Thumbs/Kidonia

[bunniefuu]

♪ Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪

(laughing)

♪ And I say hey ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful
kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ You've got to listen to your
heart, listen to the b*at ♪

♪ Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪

♪ Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪

♪ Get together
and make things better ♪

♪ By working together ♪

♪ It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Believe in yourself,
for that's the place to start ♪

♪ And I say hey ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful
kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful
kind of day ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful
kind of day ♪

Hey!

Hey, D.W.!

Hey!

Whoa...

ARTHUR:
Have you ever thought about

how different something
might have been

if you had done it
just one minute earlier,

or even later?

(doorbell rings)

How much better everything
would have been?

(watch beeps)

Hi, Arthur.

Well, how about that?

You're right on time!

Buster's still
in his room.

Why don't you tell him
if he doesn't hurry up

you'll miss your movie.

Hey, Buster, come on!

The movie starts
in minutes.

Okay, let's go.

ARTHUR:
That's what would've happened
if I'd been one minute later.

But instead...

(rewinding noises)

(doorbell rings)

Hi, Arthur.

Well, how about that?

You're one minute early!

Why don't you run on up
and tell him

if he doesn't hurry,
you boys will miss your movie.

Hey, Buster, come on!

The movie starts in...

(gasps)

Arthur!

Arthur...

Uh, I'll be right back.

Okay, you can come back in now!

(worried sigh)

Arthur?

(door slams)

You better get going if...

Where's Arthur?

He had to go.

But I thought you two
were going to the movies.

He had to go home.

(gasps)

Mom! Dad! D.W.!

Come quickly!

I just found out something
about Buster!

What? What?

(whispering)

(gasping)

I knew it!

He was always
too goofy.

And immature.

Exactly!

I don't want you hanging out
with him anymore.

My son hobnobbing
with babies.

Don't worry, I won't.

Luckily, there's
a PTA meeting tonight

so we can warn
the other parents.

Why wait?

Let's get on the phone now.

(dialing)

(phone ringing)

(groans)

ARTHUR:
Hello, Buster?

(dial tone)

Email.

Email is better.

BUSTER:
"Hi, Arthur.

"It's me,

"your buddy, Buster!

"I know what you just saw
looked kind of weird,

"but it's not that
big a deal, right?

I mean..."

D.W.:
Now, Suzy,
what did I tell you

about sucking your thumb?

That's only for babies
like Kate.

BUSTER:
"I mean, we're still
best friends, right?

"Your best friend, Buster.

P.S.: Please don't tell
anybody."

"Hi, Buster.

Yeah, we're still..."

Not that big a deal?

I'm glad we're still
best friends, Arthur.

Of course!

Why wouldn't we be?

And don't worry,
I won't tell anybody.

Actually,
I thought about that.

Now that I know
you're okay with it,

I don't care
if the whole world knows.

What's wrong?

It's no big deal, right?

Just like you said.

(groans)

(gasping)

We're best friends!

(loud sucking noise)

(gasps)

Hi!

Did you get my...

Hi, Buster!

Gotta run!

Don't want to be late!

Hey, guys.

Oh, hey.

Arthur's over there.

I know.

I want to hang out
with you guys today.

How 'bout them Grebes, right?

Weird.

Why didn't Buster
come sit with us?

What?

Oh, I don't know.

Maybe he just feels like
a change of pace.

Don't you care?

No.

Why would I care?

He can sit where he wants.

Mmm, these beans
are delicious!

What's up?

Nothing.

Yeah, right.

And then I forgot to write
my lemur report,

so I had to...

ARTHUR:
He can sit where he wants!

FRANCINE:
Why didn't Buster
come sit with you?

Buster?

(laughs sheepishly)

I know!

You had a fight.

No!

You did something to him.

He did something to you.

He caught you at something.

You caught him at something.

(coughs)

A-ha!

What is it?

What did Buster do?

C'mon, you know you want
to tell me!

(faint conversation)

Whoa!

I'm okay!

(laughs nervously)

Just had a wobbly seat.

I, uh, better get someone
to fix it.

Yeah...

Okay, you have got to tell us
what's going on.

Gotta run!

The lemur has a striped tail.

The lemur is small.

The lemur is a primate.

The lemur eats plants.

The lemur has a long snout.

The lemur has a wet nose.

The lemur has a good sense
of smell.

(whispering)

Not so fast, Arthur!

I told you already!

I can't say anything!

At least give me a hint.

You can run,
but you can't hide!

He's told everyone!

I just know it!

What am I gonna do?

Hello, is this where you go
to find a grown-up job?

I know I look young,
but I have three...

well, two-and-a-half years
of elementary school,

plus kindergarten.

(phone rings)

(fast voice on the phone)

Thank you for telling us,
Mr. Read.

(gasps)

(bell ringing)

Okay, enough already.

Ah!

Arthur!

What's the big idea,
telling everybody?

I asked you not to.

I didn't.

Don't say that.

I know you did.

You were talking about me
in the cafeteria.

Because you fell
out of your seat.

And then in class,
you were passing notes.

No, Francine was
passing notes to me

and I was telling her
to stop it.

BUSTER:
Oh, right.

It's true!

This coming from the kid
who ran away from my house

and then wouldn't even reply
to my email!

Well, I...

I...

Who sucks their thumb anyway?

Shh!

You're eight years old,
Buster.

I try to stop,
but it's hard.

And I only do it sometimes,
not when anyone can see.

So?

It's my own problem.

It doesn't hurt anybody.

Not like ratting
on your friend.

I didn't rat on you.

MUFFY:
What'd I miss?

Shh!

Oops.

Sorry.

Was it good?

No.

No, it wasn't.

A-ha!

I knew it!

Okay, so now you know.

Satisfied?

Will someone please tell me
what's going on?

FRANCINE:
Wait, Buster!

Wait, wait, wait!

I just...
I have something that...

Here.

What is it?

A potion that makes you
invisible?

You mean you actually
do have a potion

that makes you invisible?

No.

It's stuff you put
on your thumb or fingers

to make them taste bad
so you don't suck them.

Oh.

Why do you have that?

Why do you think?

You, too?

I hardly do it anymore.

Don't tell anybody?

Don't worry.

I know how to keep a secret.

And I should probably tell you
one more thing...

(doorbell rings)

Oh, hello, Buster.

(gasps)

Hi, Arthur.

No, I didn't tell them,
I swear!

I know.

Francine told me.

I just wanted to say
I'm sorry I said you did.

Actually, I'm the one
who should be sorry.

It was really mean of me
to run away the other day.

Really?

You mean it?

I shouldn't have gotten
so freaked out.

Yeah, but you're right.

I am in third grade,
and I shouldn't do it.

It makes my thumb all wrinkly,
like this.

Like what?

Wait.

You know what?

I haven't sucked my thumb at all
since you saw me!

Wow!

Maybe you were so worried
about me telling on you that...

No, don't jinx it!

Best friends again?

Best friends.

And now...

Today, friends, we're going
to talk about habits.

What is a habit?

GIRL:
When you do something
over and over again.

You can't control
what you're doing.

Arthur saw Buster
sucking his thumb.

BOY:
And Francine gave Buster advice,

and that's what we're doing.

We're trying to help each other.

You're going to think
about some habits

that you would like to break,

and then you're also going
to think about some advice

that you can give
to your partner.

Partner A would share
their habit

and then Partner B
would give them suggestions.

My habit is that I lie
to my mom and dad.

KIDS:
Wow!

And I think I have
that habit, too.

One suggestion I can give you
is that you can be more honest

to your mom and dad.

Okay, I'll try to do that.

My habit is biting my hair.

Can you show us how you bite
your hair?

It's kind of disgusting
and weird.

One way you can fix
your habit

is to put your hair
in a ponytail.

I think some habits
are embarrassing.

Like burping, for instance.

Every time after I eat, I burp.

There's nothing wrong
with you burping

as long as you say "pardon me"
or "excuse me."

KIDS:
Yeah!

The habit I want to break is
sleeping with a stuffed animal.

KIDS:
That's not a bad habit!

It's not such a bad habit.

The bad habit's
not really bad.

If it makes you feel comfortable
when you're sleeping,

you should do that.

I bite my nails.

I bite my fingernails.

Biting my nails.

We seem to have
a lot of people

that bite their nails.

I think you should put
lemon juice on your nails,

and when she goes to bite her
nails, it won't taste good,

and if she does that
a few times,

she'll probably
break her habit.

I think if you want to break
a habit, you can do it.

And now...

("Pomp and Circumstance"
playing)

Wouldn't it be great to have
your own country?

You could eat
whatever you wanted.

You could play whenever
you felt like it.

(gasps)

(crashing)

You could even do
all those things

your parents tell you
not to do.

(laughing happily)

The citizenry await
your greatness,

Mr. President.

(sighs)

Okay...

CROWD:
Arthur! Arthur! Arthur!

But would it really be
a country...

Arthur! Arthur!

...if you were
the only citizen?

KIDS:
All hail Kidonia!

Hey Dad, going to the park
with some friends,

be back by lunch,
and then I'm...

Whoa, slow down.

You were going to help me
with the yard work, remember?

(groans)

Okay, shrubs all watered,
I'll be back in...

Arthur, did you
clean your room?

(groans)

Um, it's clean.

Kind of.

(groans)

(sighs)

Finally.

Arthur, you said
you'd help me build

the Fairy Mary Moo Cow
Cookie Castle, remember?

Oh yeah, sorry,
I don't have time.

Maybe tomorrow?

Mom, Arthur's breaking
his promise!

(groans)

It was pieces,

not including the Fairy Mary
Moo Cow Cookie Carriage!

At least you didn't have
to empty the cat box.

Twice!

Never feed your cat
leftover Chinese food.

I spent my morning defragging
my parents' hard drive.

I don't know what that is,
but it sounds terrible.

Why do parents make us
do all these chores?

It's like they don't want us
to have fun.

If I had my own country,

it'd be against the law
to give kids chores.

Too bad you can't have
your own country.

Why can't we?

Uh, because you can't just
declare your independence

and call yourself a country?

Actually, you can.

There are a lot of tiny
countries in the world.

There's even one called Sealand

that's just a platform
in the Atlantic Ocean.

Friends, young people,
classmates,

by the power invested in...

...this baseball,

I declare us all citizens
of Kid...

...onia!

All hail Kidonia!

♪ Oh, dear Kidonia,
I pledge my loyalty ♪

♪ Where kids have broke
the chains ♪

♪ Of parental tyranny ♪

♪ Where chores are no more
and fun is guaranteed ♪

♪ All hail Kidonia,
land where kids are free! ♪

Okay, we have a flag,
a Latin slogan,

a national anthem
and traditional Kidonian hats.

What now?

We should have a constitution

so people know
what we stand for.

Good idea.

Here's something...

"No Rules, No Laws, No Chores."

All in favour?

Aye!

Any other ideas
for the constitution?

That one covers all the ones
I can think of.

It's brilliantly concise.

I think I'll put my socks
on my ears.

Why?

Because I can!

I love this country!

Arthur, will you
help me clear?

Sorry, Dad.

I'm a citizen of Kidonia now,

and we don't do chores
or follow any rules.

It's in our constitution.

Kidonia?

What's that?

A new country I made

with Buster, Brain
and Francine.

Here's my passport.

I see.

Well, we have a tradition
in this country:

if you don't help clear,
you don't get dessert.

It goes against everything
I believe in.

Huh?

(groans)

But I'll do it
just this once.

I have my own country, too!

D.W.-Land.

We're not allowed
to eat broccoli.

Nice try, D.W.

It didn't work
for me either.

I told my mom that
it was against my principles,

but she still made me empty out
my food cabinet.

All I have left now is Yamlet,
Prince of Tubers.

Life is so much better
back home in Kidonia.

Hey, why don't we spend
the night there on Saturday?

That's a great idea!

I'll bring snacks,
Brain can bring ice cream.

It'll be a national holiday!

(yawns)

Well, good night,
Citizen Read.

Good night,
Citizen Baxter.

It's Kidonian money.

My friend Brain made it.

See, it works like a coupon!

Each bill is worth one favor.

In this case, you get

minutes of free advice.

Ask away, my friend!

(gasps)

I never said you could use
Kiddies outside of Kidonia!

Then what good are they?

There's nothing to buy
in Kidonia!

I'll sell you something!

I was going to give them to you
tonight at the sleepover,

but you can have them now.

Air fresheners?

What am I supposed to do
with these?

Hang one on each ear.

Your socks don't bother me
when they're on your feet,

but when they're on your head,
they stink up the country.

Tough!

Read the constitution.

I can do whatever I want
in Kidonia.

But those socks really smell!

Well, we'll just see

what the High Court says
about this tonight!

There is no High Court!

There is now!

I just made it!

Good day to you both.

We hope to see you again,
Mr. Read.

Safe travels.

Thank you.

You have a beautiful country.

You better send me
a postcard.

♪ All hail Kidonia,
land where kids are free! ♪

Hey, let's stay up all night!!

You know why?

Because we can!

(cheering)

Long live Kidonia!

Huh?

Where are you going?

Home!

I mean my real home.

I'm not living in a country

where a quarter
of the population

behaves like pigs!

You're just jealous because
my ears are nice and warm.

I formally renounce
my citizenship.

Good luck.

You're going
to need it.

I would've brought more food

if a certain someone
hadn't given me phony money.

It's not phony!

Kiddies are worth something

as long as you spend them
in Kidonia.

Here, I'll pay you
for my share of the pretzel.

For a free word problem?

Forget it!

That's a bargain.

You know how hard it is
to make one of those up?

Why don't we just split
the pretzel evenly three ways?

Um, that wasn't supposed
to happen.

Who gets that piece?

We'll settle it
the Kidonian way:

through mind reading.

Okay, who can guess what
I'm thinking right now?

Mind reading is impossible.

It goes against
the laws of physics.

Maybe.

But there are no laws here.

And that wasn't
what I was thinking.

Well?

I have no idea!

Aliens?

Pizza?

Aliens eating pizza?

(gasps)

(sighs)

Well played, my friend.

Well played.

Our population is dwindling.

I'm hungry.

And chilly.

Maybe having our own country
wasn't such a good idea.

What do you mean?

It's a great idea!

Where else can you spill
a whole bottle of apple juice

and not get scolded
by anyone?

Is that why there are
so many ants in here?

Could be.

Well, why didn't you
clean it up?

Because I didn't have to.

Read the Consti...

I don't have to read
the Constitution!

I wrote the Constitution!

And now I'm adding
something to it!

"He who spills something
cleans it up!"

You know, Kidonia
used to be a place

where a kid could do
whatever he wanted.

Now it's just like
everywhere else.

Good bye, Citizen Read.

I'm moving to Baxtervania.

(groans)

Hi, honey.

How are things back
in Kidonia?

Okay, I guess.

Actually, there is
no Kidonia anymore.

Everyone left.

Would it be okay
if I stayed here?

Of course.

You can stay as long
as you like.

Or at least
until you turn .

But you'll have to follow
some rules and do some chores.

Deal.

Oh, and since D.W. couldn't have
her own country,

I allowed her to be
head of security for this one.

(gasps)

I'm going to have to see
everything in these bags, sir.

Passport, please.

If everything checks out,
you'll be X-rayed,

then Y-rayed,
and finally Q-rayed.

Right this way, please.

(groans)

Is this going to take long?

Very.