01x03 - Yard Sale

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

[Bubble Wrap popping]

-I love this so much.
-I feel so alive.

-I'm a bubble-popping machine.

-Guys,
we have a serious problem.

-So satisfying.
-Can't stop, won't stop.

-I said
we have a serious problem.

[Bubble Wrap popping]

-Hey, when did you get here?

-Listen, I just counted
the money we've earned

from our last couple
KidDING jobs.

-And you discovered
we have extra

so we can buy more Bubble Wrap?

-No, I discovered we're short
for the next Tedward payment.

-[scoffs] Why can't your dad
give us a break, Munchy?

We set his boat on fire
one time

and now he's making it
into a thing.

-This is serious.

There are no KidDINGs
coming in.

If we don't pay him,

he'll make us scrape gum off
toilets at school,

or worse, urinals.

-Hey,
why don't you finally tell us

where you keep our money?

-Yeah.
We've asked a million times.

It's almost like
you don't trust me and Munchy.

-Yeah.
-Of course I trust you.

You're my friends--

my friends who would spend all
of our money on Bubble Wrap.

-You're probably right.
-We have a serious problem.

-Okay, let's think.

We need
to make some money fast.

Ugh, I can't focus with
all of this junk everywhere.

-Wait, I got it.

"Junk" rhymes with "trunk."

Elephants have trunks.

Elephants live outside.
[gasps]

We should have a yard sale!

-I love seeing
how your brain works.

-A yard sale is a great idea.

I have a ton of old stuff
we can sell.

-Permission to pop Bubble Wrap
to celebrate my good idea?

-Permission granted.

both: [sighing]
[Bubble Wrap popping]

-It's t*rture
watching you pop bubbles.

Scooch over.

all: [sighing]
Oh, yeah.

♪ ♪

-[gasps] You're selling
your plunger windmill?

-Yeah.

My dream
of bathroom miniature golf

was too beautiful
for this world.

I didn't know
you had a marionette.

-It's not mine.

-A trophy awarded for...

outstanding achievement
in marionetting.

-That's not mine, either.

-Hey,
your old marionette trophy.

-Go away, Fisher.

Munchy, Lex, and I are
setting up for our yard sale.

-I see.

So stuff from Lex's personal
life will be available for sale

to a boy
who might be her soulmate?

-Normally, we would take money
from anyone,

but scram, kid, ya bug me.

-Just so you know,
love always finds a way.

And I'm full of love.

-So how much should we charge
for the marionette?

-Who cares?
-All right, ¢.

- ¢ for Sweet Pea?
Are you crazy?

-Wow, great job finding
all this stuff to sell.

The plunger windmill?
You're giving up your dream?

-Not giving it up,

just passing it on
to a fellow dreamer for $ .

-Here is my yard sale
contribution.

-What is this?
-A three-hole punch.

-What's it do?

-Punches three holes
into paper.

It's actually a lot of fun.

-Munchy and I
got all this stuff

and this is the only thing
you could find?

-I looked around my room

and this is the one thing
I didn't need.

I've gone paperless.

-We're all making sacrifices
here.

Munchy's giving up
his plunger windmill.

-I don't know.
I'm thinking of buying it back.

-Lex, we all know you have a
hard time letting go of things.

-Not true.

-So you're saying if I went
into your room right now,

I couldn't find one thing
to sell?

-Not a one.

-Challenge.
-[gasps]

-Challenge accepted.
-[gasps twice]

-Come to my room
and see for yourself.

-That's exactly what we'll do.

-Per the rules governing
challenges,

whoever is proved wrong
must perform a walrus dance.

together:
We know how challenges work.

-[high-pitched] I like when
you explain the rules, Munchy.

[normally]
Thanks, Sweet Pea.

[high-pitched]
Can you make me fly around?

[normally]
I don't see why not.

[high-pitched] Whee!
I'm flying like a bird!

[giggles]
You're the best, Munchy.

[normally]
I know, buddy.

[kids screaming indistinctly]

-Every time I come over,

there's more kids
in your family.

-Four brothers, four sisters.
Same as always.

-Looks like there's kids
out there.

[door closes and
screaming becomes inaudible]

-Whoa.
What happened?

-She soundproofed her room.
-Mm.

-Yeah.

I love my family, but I love
not hearing them even more.

-Yeah.
One of them tried to eat me.

-That would be Sam or Casey.
They're the biters.

Isn't that right, Reggie?
[dog toy squeaks]

[studio audience awws]
-Hi, Reggie.

-Hi, Reggie.

It's so nice and quiet
with the door shut, isn't it?

-All right, let's get back
to the challenge.

You're saying
there's nothing here

we can sell at our yard sale?

-That's what I'm saying.

-What about...this?

Do you really need
a miniature surfboard?

-That's an ironing board.

-Do you really need
an ironing board?

[intercom chimes]
-Honey, are you there?

[intercom chimes]
-What's up, Mom?

-Casey has something
to say to Munchtopher.

Do it right now, young man.

-I'm sowwy for biting you.

-No worries, Casey.

It's my fault
for being so Munch-alicious.

-Love you, Mom.
-Love you too.

Sam, take that hermit crab
out of your mouth!

-Okay, I found the perfect
thing for the yard sale.

What about this?

-No, no, no, no.

I need that.
-For what?

It's just like the one
Reggie's chewing.

There's no way you need two
of them.

-To me, it's valuable.

-This dog toy?
That goes in the dog's mouth?

To be chewed?
Is valuable?

-That's right.

[mimicking tone]
And don't say it...like that.

-You know what I think?

I think this is the perfect
thing to sell and you know it.

But you have a problem
letting go of things.

-No, I don't.

Give that back.

-I knew it.

And you won't admit I'm right,

because then you'd have
to do a walrus dance.

-Per the rules governing
challenges,

if you lie about a challenge,

the walrus dance time
is doubled.

together:
We know how challenges work.

-Well, who's doing the dance?

-Lex.
-Presley.

-Let's discuss this later.

We have to get back
to the yard sale.

My plunger windmill
is not gonna sell itself.

-Bye, Reggie.
You're the best doggie ever.

Yes, you are!

-Don't look at me like that,
Reggie.

You know Lex has a problem
letting go of things.

Good boy.
Yes, you are!

-♪ I got you, got me,
we got this ♪

♪ I like the odds
when we're side-by-side ♪

♪ I like the sound of that ♪

♪ Oh, we're taking off,
gonna do this right ♪

♪ I like the sound of that ♪

♪ And when things go up
and friends are on it ♪

♪ 'Cause I got you,
got me, we got this ♪

♪ ♪

-Give it a good home.

-With the exception
of that old marionette trophy,

we sold everything.

Check it out.

[whispering]
It's money.

[chuckling]

[normally] This plus
the cash you've hidden

will give us enough
to pay Tedward.

-We're gonna buy
so much Bubble Wrap.

-I'll take that.

-And I'll take
one walrus dance.

-Not gonna happen

since you didn't find anything
in my room to sell.

So you have
to do the walrus dance.

-Oh, I did find something
to sell.

I swiped that dog toy
from your room

and sold it
when you weren't looking,

so I'm not a-dancing.

-Are you a-crazy?

All of our KidDING money
was in there.

-Huh?
-What?

-That toy
has a secret compartment

where I hide all
of our KidDING money.

-Why didn't you tell us?

-I told you it was valuable.

-How am I supposed to know
what you mean by "valuable"?

To you, everything is valuable.

-All right.

I hate it when you two
squabble.

If I did a walrus dance,
would you stop?

together:
No.

-We need to get
that dog toy back.

-You mean my dog toy
that you sold without asking?

-I did ask.

I just ignored you
when you said no.

-Well,
now we don't have enough money.

-Doing it.

[quirky saxophone music]

♪ ♪

-The walrus dance.

-They stopped squabbling.
It's working.

♪ ♪

-I can't look away.
-Time and space have stopped.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Are we sure about using Jaget
to track down the dog toy?

I mean,
your brother is kind of--

-A lunatic?
-Yes, but--

-Weirdly intense?
-For sure. And also--

-Someone who slows down
the Internet

by streaming
too many karate videos?

-I wasn't gonna say that,
but my point is,

is he the person
that we wanna ask for help?

-Trust me,
this is what he lives for.

[heavy footfall]
-Aha!

Didn't expect me, did you?

-We invited you here.

-I assume you have the payment
for my daddy?

-We don't have all the money,
but--

-Oh, boy.
No payment, no mercy.

-Listen, we need your help--

-Oh, you mean like
how my daddy needed a boat

and you kids exploded it?

-Can you just listen for--

-Beast mode activating
in five, four,

three, two--

-Maybe we should find another
bounty hunter.

-Bounty hunter?

-Yeah.

You know, someone who finds
people and then gets a reward.

-I know what it is.

I wrote the book
on bounty hunting.

-So you've done it before?

-No.

But in the book I wrote,

I was a bounty hunter
and I was great.

-Good enough.

We need you to find a kid

who bought a dog toy
at our yard sale.

-What kinda reward do I get
when I bring him in?

-This trophy.

-"Outstanding Achievement
in Bounty Hunting."

Why does the trophy guy holding
a puppet on strings?

-Uh,
because a good bounty hunter...

-Controls bad guys.
-Like puppets.

-I want it.

-You get it
when you bring us the dog toy.

-I have a picture
from the yard sale

with the kid in the background
of it.

I'll send it to you.

-Don't need to.
It's saved to the cloud.

Let me see it one more time.

Yep, in the cloud.

-Well,
good luck bounty hunting.

-Not so fast, little bro.

It's time for you
to learn the family business.

-Bring a principal?
-No.

-Being a crossing guard?
-No, being a bounty hunter.

-No one
in our family does that.

-False.
I do.

And I'm gonna teach you.

-I'm good.

-Oh, you're good?

Okay.
Bounty hunting pop quiz.

You're wrestling with a outlaw
in the middle of the desert.

He pulls a crossbow on you.
What do you do?

-Run away?
-Wrong!

You never go in the middle
of the desert.

Only the edges.

I got a lot to teach you.
Let's go.

-Do you think he's gonna be
okay?

-Get up those stairs, Munchy!

-Is that a fork?
Ow, ow, ow!

-He's gonna be fine.

♪ ♪

Presley, Presley, Presley!

-What, what, what?

-I just saw Tedward pull
into his driveway.

He said he's gonna come over
here for his payment.

Are Munchy and Jaget back
with the dog toy yet?

-I haven't gotten an update
from Munchy since he texted,

"At park.

Jaget teaching me
to interrogate dogs."

-We're gonna have
to stall Tedward.

-Hi, girls.

About to head
to my fist archery class

and I'm trying
to make a good impression.

Which shirt should I wear?

-I'm gonna choose...

just put a shirt on!

[knock at door]
-Come in.

I don't know why I said that.
This is not my house.

-Hey.

-There's my favorite principal
without a boat.

We can joke about that now,
right?

Too soon?
-It will always be too soon.

-Tedward.
[sighs casually]

So glad another cool dad
is here.

What shirt is better
for archery?

This one is wildflowers.

Like, "That guy's wild."

This one is cactuses.

Like, "I bet that guy's
a little dangerous...

like a cactus."

-I'm just here to talk
to the girls, eh?

-Oh.
Yeah, sure, uh, I knew--

-The cactus.
-Yes, I knew it.

Don't move.

I need you
to pick out my pants.

-So...I'll take my payment.

-Um--

-If you don't have it,

I can always get you jobs
at school.

The marching band needs help
cleaning spit out of the tubas.

-No, we have the payment.

But we don't keep
the money in the kitchen.

-Where it could be
accidentally microwaved.

-Which Presley
has done before.

-She's so right,

so I'll leave the kitchen
to go get the payment.

Lex will stay in the kitchen
and make you lunch.

-What?

-I do like to eat,

but I really should collect
the money and go.

-What if I promised you

you won't have to pick out
my dad's pants?

-Let's lunch.

♪ ♪

[dog toys squeak]

-You found the dog toy.
-Better.

We found all the dog toys.

[dog toys squeaking]

-We've actually been having
a great time.

Right, bounty bro?

-You know it, bounty bro.

together: ♪ Everybody knows
we're the bounty bros ♪

♪ Wherever there's trouble,
that's where we goes ♪

♪ Bounty bros, ha!
Bounty bros, ha! ♪

♪ We're tough from our head
down to our toes ♪

Remix!

♪ Bounty bros--♪
-No!

No remix.
There is no time.

And where did
all these dog toys come from?

-We did a sweep of the town.

Confiscated every dog toy
we encountered.

-Yeah, we stole 'em.

We would've been here earlier,

but we had to work
on our dance.

[dog toy squeaks]

♪ ♪

-How much food are you making?

-I've got a family of ,
so we cook in bulk.

Hope you're hungry.

-Can I just get the payment?
We don't have to do lunch now.

-No, we have to do lunch now.

[fake sobbing]
Because...

we feel so bad
about burning your boat.

We're just trying
to make it up to you.

-Fine, fine.
I'll stay.

Just stop crying.

-[casually]
Okay.

-What are you making, anyway?

-Meatloaf.

-Okay, Tedward.
Decision time.

I've narrowed it down to my
favorite seven pairs of pants.

-This lunch better be good.

♪ ♪

[dog toys squeak]
-It's not here.

We just needed one dog toy--
the one we were looking for.

-When hunting bounties,
I cast a wide net.

You would know this if you read
my bounty hunting book.

-It's true.

There's a whole chapter
on how wide his net is.

-You two need to go back out
there and find the right kid

with the right dog toy.

Can I please send you
a picture of the boy?

[dogs barking]

-They found us.

I don't know how,
but they found us.

-Who?

-Who do you think?
The dogs!

They want their toys back!
Run for it, Munchy!

-[yelps]
[dogs barking]

-I'm sending you
the boy's picture.

Your cloud is unreliable.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

-Look, I'm missing "NCIS."

If lunch isn't ready,
I'll take my payment and go.

-Tedward,
you gotta be patient.

It'll all be worth it
when you taste Lex's chili.

-Meatloaf.
-Really?

Tell you what.

How 'bout some more
mountain spring water?

-I do like fancy water.

-Got that water from the sink.
-I know.

We have to stall him until
Jaget and Munchy get back

with the kid who bought
the dog toy.

-I just don't think you should
lie about water sources.

[cell phone chimes]

-Jaget and Munchy are back.
They're in the basement.

-Finally.
-Oh, lunch is done?

-What?
I mean--heck yeah, it is.

-But--oh, no.

We're out of napkins.

Let's get more
from the basement.

-Right.
We should both go.

Those napkins are heavy.

-We got him.

Little bro,

as head bounty hunter,
I speak for the group.

We got him.

-That's him.

That's the kid
who bought the dog toy.

-How did you find him?

-We went to the lake
and rode some swan boats,

then we went to get snow cones.

This kid happened to be
in the line in front of us.

I grabbed him.

-And I grabbed his snow cone.

-We need to get back
the dog toy I sold you.

-I don't have it anymore.

-We're gonna need that dog toy
and we're gonna need it now.

-I'm not saying nothing
to nobody.

-Get my nunchuks.

-No, we got this.

You don't want to talk?
That's fine.

I'll just k*ll the time popping
bubbles on this Bubble Wrap

until you're ready.

[Bubble Wrap popping]

-When I see someone popping
Bubble Wrap,

I can't resist popping them,
too.

[Bubble Wrap popping]

Oh, yeah.
So satisfying.

-Do you think
I can pop a bubble?

-Aw, you wanna pop a bubble?

You gotta tell us
where the dog toy is.

Then you get the whole sheet.

[Bubble Wrap popping]

-You wanna pop,
you gotta talk.

[Bubble Wrap popping]

-Okay, fine.

I'll talk.

I didn't buy the dog toy
for myself.

Some kid gave me the money
to buy it for him.

Now let me pop some bubbles.

-Not so fast.
Who was the kid?

-I don't know.
I swear I don't know the kid.

-I believe him.
End his suffering.

[Bubble Wrap popping]
-That's the stuff.

-Hey, why is Munchy's dad
in our kitchen?

Uh-oh.

-That's him.

That's the kid who paid me
to buy the dog toy.

-That's not true.

Who are you gonna listen to?

Some weird stranger
or Lex's future husband?

[dog toy squeaks]

-What was that sound, Fisher?

-It's probably just the sound
of...

global warming.

[chuckles]
The problem is real.

[dog toy squeaks]

-That's the dog toy.

-Okay, okay.

I paid that kid to buy it.
-Why?

-Because it was Lex's

and you said you wouldn't
sell me anything of hers.

-Why are you wearing it
around your neck?

-To keep it close to my heart.

-Fisher,

even by your standards,
that's a little weird.

-I have no regrets.

One day, you'll grow
to love my little quirks.

-Today is not the day.

Got it.

-Let this be a lesson to...
[Bubble Wrap popping]

-He's taking
all our Bubble Wrap!

-Get him!

-Explain.
-There was...

an eruption of lava.

-Lex, explain.

-Presley sold my dog's toy

but didn't know that the money
that we owe you was inside,

so we stalled you
by making lunch

while Munchy and Jaget
worked together

to find the boy who bought it,

but it turns out
Fisher paid him to buy the toy

so he could make a necklace
and here's your money.

-Is that all?

-The mountain spring water
we gave you is from the sink.

-I knew it didn't taste fancy.

So there's no reason

I'm holding this strange boy
by the collar?

-No.

-Well,

even with the incredible amount
of unnecessary lying,

it's good to hear my sons
worked together.

Good job, boys.

-♪ Everybody knows
we're the bounty... ♪

Bros.

You forgot our bounty bro
handshake?

-I never forget a handshake.

But your training is over

and it's time for me
to go back to working solo.

Solo means alone.

-Ooh, I can catch
the last minutes of "NCIS."

-All right.
There was a challenge issued.

Who's doing the walrus dance?

together:
She is.

-Per the rules governing
challenges,

in the event
there is no clear winner,

both people must walrus dance.

together:
We know how challenges work.

-Five, six, seven, eight!

[quirky saxophone music]

♪ ♪

Got room for one more walrus?

together:
[imitate walrus bark]

♪ ♪

[barking like walruses]