02x19 - Altoonisburg Al

[bunniefuu]

-Snack time!

Ooh!

Hmm, strawberries or blueberries?

-He's about to pick!

-Why choose when I can have both?

-No, you can't do that!
-Ah!

-Horrigan, you have to pick one or the other.

-Just like Altoonisburg Al.

-Who is Altoonisburg Al

and what does he have to do with my snack?

-Altoonisburg Al is a possum who comes out

of his tree on Possum Day.

-Ugh, can someone else besides her talk?

All I hear is blah, blah, blah.

-If Al eats strawberries,
then we get six more weeks

of summer, but if he chooses blueberries,

then summer is officially
over and we go back to school.

-So why don't you want me to choose a bowl?

-It's an experiment.

We want to know which bowl Al's gonna choose

and you're about the same size as a possum.

-Fisher's not gonna like
it when he hears you took

me away from his science.

-Which bowl did he pick?

-Sir, you were in on this?

-It's important. See, they plan when school

starts based on this possum.

-The whole town comes out to the festival

to see which bowl Al's gonna choose.

Plus, you can get Al's pawtograph.

I almost have a complete set.

I just need the back right
paw. It's the toughest one to get.

-And Possum Day is the one time of year

you can get possum juice.

-And that's a good thing?

-Of course!

I even volunteered to work the booth.

I'm gonna drink my weight in possum juice.

-You know who else loves possum juice?

Altoonisburg Al!

-Ah, I forgot you had a stuffed animal Al.

-I'm not a stuffed animal. I'm a puppet.

Happy Possum Day.

[upbeat music]

-Wow, they're really going all
out for Possum Day this year.

-Yup, this looks amazing.

Oh, and by the way, Luke is gonna meet us here.

-Okay, we'll be on our best behavior

and won't make any kissy noises behind your back.

-I make no promises.

-Oh, man, Al's in that tree.

It's so weird to be around celebrities.

I mean, they're just like us, but not really.

-Calm down.

There is no reason to freak out.

Oh, my gosh, possum juice!

-Hey, Lex.
-Luke? What a surprise.

-We made plans to meet here.

-Let's not fight on Possum Day.

[making kissy noises]

-I can hear you.
-So can I.

-Hey, I told you I can make no promises,

and I held out as long as I could.

-Come on.

-That's where Altoonisburg
Al chooses which bowl to eat.

-He better choose strawberries.

Come on, six more weeks of summer.

-No way, I want him to choose blueberries.

-Wait, but that means
summer's over and we go back

to school six weeks early.

-Her birthday's at the end of summer

and she never gets to celebrate it at school.

-I just want people to sing happy birthday to me

while I pretend I don't want them to.

I've been practicing.

Oh, you guys.

Stop it.

Everyone's looking.

-Wow, you are really good at that.

That should not be wasted.

-All right, nobody's here yet

so I'm gonna get Al's pawtograph, no problem.

-Yes problem.

-Jaget, what are you doing here?

-I was deputized by the mayor to protect

this possum with my life.

Word on the street is those dirt bags from

Pittstown are gonna try to kidnap Al.

-Ugh, Pittstown.

More like arm-Pittstown, am I right?

-'Cause they stink.

[upbeat music]

-Are we going to the Possum Day festival or what?

-Yep, as soon as we finish testing out

our new elevating shoes.

We call them Liftiez.

-Liftiez.

-The Z at the end was my idea.

-Okay, but do we have to do this right now?

-Laura House's birthday is
next week at Coaster World

and unfortunately, we're
still too short for the best rides.

But we'll fix that with Liftiez.

-Liftiez.

-When I press this button, the shoes will extend

and Horrigan will become taller.

Are you ready?
-Ready, sir.

Take me to the world of ' ".

-We'll start slow.

In three, two, one.

[button beeps]
-Ah!

[loud thump]
-Ugh!

-Horrigan, are you okay?

-I think so, sir.

Sorry for denting the ceiling with my head.

I think I need to lay down.

-Yeah, easy, buddy.

Up.

-Can someone please remove the shoes

that tried to k*ll me?

-Are you touching my hand?
-Sorry.

-If you're sorry, why are
you still touching her hand?

[button beeps and bed whirs]

-Whoa, did the bed just eat Horrigan?

-I accidentally hit the button
that changes my bed to my desk.

-Your desk is a transformer?

How cool is that?

-I know, right?

-Could you two stop flirting and help me?

-Sorry, Horrigan, we'll get you out.

[button clicks and bed groans]

[button clicking]

Uh, it's not working.

You might be stuck in there a little longer.

-It's okay, sir,

it feels like your house is giving me a hug.

[upbeat music]

-Keep it moving you possum-peeker.

-Stupid Jaget, keeping me
from getting my pawtograph.

-Don't worry, you'll get your chance.

-Munchy!
-Madam Mayor!

-Oh, you may rise.

-Thanks for volunteering to run our booth.

Have some possum juice on me.

Make sure to save some
for Al, he loves the stuff.

-Ah, my first taste of the season.

[juice splashes]

-What is this, liquid garbage?

-I was afraid you'd say that.

The guy who usually makes
the possum juice retired.

We tried to recreate the recipe

and this is the best we could come up with.

-Guys, try this.

-No, you just said it tastes like liquid garbage.

-Yeah, there's no way we're gonna try it--

-[spitting loudly]

That is disgusting.

-I vow to find the real recipe for possum juice.

I don't care how long it takes.

-Well, the booth opens in minutes

so figure it out by then.

-Out of my way. Pittstown rules!

I'm taking your stupid possum.

-Stop, pedestrian.

[cheers and applause]

Gotcha, you Pittstown dirtbag.

-Look, Jaget left Al's tree unguarded,

this is my chance to get my fourth pawtograph.

Come on!

-Yeah, this feels like a them thing.

-You've got good instincts, bro.

-Now, come on, help me with the possum juice.

-Hey there, Al, I'm Presley.

I have a puppet of you.

I know that sounds weird, but it's not.

-Hey, just tell him to pick blueberry

so I can have my birthday at school.

-I think we both know I'm not gonna do that.

Obviously, I want him to choose
strawberry so summer's longer.

Listen, Al--

Where is Al?

-Look in the tree!

-Uh, he's not in here.

-What?

Oh no. Oh, no-no, he must've escaped.

-So did we just...

-Let the most famous possum
in Altoonisburg get away?

-Yes, we did.
-Right, and should we...

-Panic because the whole
town is going to want to k*ll us?

Yes, we should.

[screaming]

-♪ I got you, got me ♪

♪ We got this ♪

♪ I like the odds when we're side by side ♪

♪ I like the sound of that, oh ♪

♪ We're taking off, gonna do this right ♪

♪ I like the sound of that ♪

♪ And when things go up in flames, we're on it ♪

♪ 'Cause I got you, got me, we got this ♪

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

-Any luck finding the possum?

-First of all, his name is Altoonisburg Al,

have some respect.

And second of all, no.

-What are we gonna do?

Everybody in town is coming to this festival

to see Al and there is no Al.

Shh, here comes Jaget.

-What are you doing by that tree?

-Well, um--well, we saw this tree being

unprotected so we decided
to guard it until you got back.

-We have a new appreciation for your job.

We salute you.

-That means a lot. Now b*at it.

I gotta check on Al.

-No, you can't!

Because he is napping before his big show.

You don't want a cranky possum, do you?

-I'll answer that, no, you do not.

-I knew that, I knew that
before you even said it.

Now if I could repeat my previous point...

b*at it.

-I have an idea.

We can set up a trap

using Al's favorite thing in the world as bait.

-Possum juice!

-Munchy.

-Oh, glad you guys are here, try this.

-Oh, good, you finally figured out the recipe?

[juice splashing]

-Apparently not.

-Why is it chunky?

-That keeps happening, we're not sure why.

-Come on, we need real possum
juice, this is an emergency.

-What's going on?

-Altoonisburg Al is missing.

-Altoonisburg Al is missing?

-Missing out on this delicious possum juice.

Right, Munchy?

-I was wrong for having you try this.

[upbeat music]

[stick cracks]

-Yeah, this isn't working.

Horrigan, you're stuck real good.

-Well, can I at least get something to drink?

-We have lemonade.

-Homemade or from a mix?

-You're in a wall, does it matter?

-Ugh, fine.

[slurping lemonade]

-Definitely from a mix.

-I have an idea how to get Horrigan out.

-I have an idea too, I can use my Jag-Jitsu moves

to hit the bed so hard that it pops open.

It always works with vending machines.

I haven't paid for candy in months.

-I'm a scientist, I don't just
hit things until they pop open.

We just have a power supply problem.

[wires snap]

If we send a jolt of electricity to the bed,

it will reboot the system and it should open.

-I'm not sure this is a good idea, sir.

-We won't know for sure
until we pump . jigawatts

of electricity in there with you.

[machine buzzing]

-That's a lot of jigawatts!

[electricity zapping]

-Is that supposed to be happening?

-No.

Hit the button.

Sorry, Horrigan, it didn't work.

Are you okay?
-Not really.

I'm a little smoky and I
have to go to the bathroom.

-Maybe stop drinking the lemonade then.

-Don't tell me what to do!

[lemonade slurping]

[upbeat music]

-Okay, we don't want people to know

that Al is missing, should we really just

leave the trap right in
the middle of the festival?

-That's why I camouflaged it.

Okay, didn't have any possum juice to use as bait

so we used the next best thing.

-Bacon.

-Is that gonna work?

-Of course, all creatures love bacon.

Possums, horses, wildebeests, various lizards--

-He gets it.

-Looks like Altoonisburg Al couldn't resist!

-All right, let's get Al back into his tree.

-You're not a possum.

-I know, I'm Ronald and this is my bacon.

-Oh, great, you have the possum juice.

-Ugh, what is that?

It tastes like sweaty milk.

-That's actually an improvement.

-This is so bad.

-Munchy, we need that possum juice

to lure him into our trap.

-Yeah, so far all we've caught
is a kid who loves bacon.

-This bacon is mine, back off!

-What are we gonna do?

-There's only one choice.

-Come clean and tell everyone
it was your fault Al got away?

-Ew, no!

I'm gonna go home, get my Altoonisburg Al puppet

and use my puppet skills to fool everyone

into thinking it's the real Al.

-That is absolutely crazy,

but I don't have a better idea

and we're running out of time, so let's do it.

-Okay, when I get back,
I'm gonna need a distraction

to get into the tree without anyone noticing.

-Oh, this idea is getting worse and worse.

-I know, right?

[upbeat music]

-Attention, Altoonisburgers.

Will there be six more weeks of summer

or will school start on Monday?

Altoonisburg Al is about to let us know.

But first, let me tell you a little story

about how I became mayor.

It was...

-We're running out of time.

Where is Presley and her Altoonisburg Al puppet?

-Okay, just relax.

-Everybody is expecting a
possum to come out of that

tree but we let Al escape and we can't find him.

-Okay, maybe don't relax.

-Ka-kaw!
-It's Presley.

-And that's when Al appeared
in my dream and said,

"You're gonna be mayor of this town."

I thought, me?

I'm just a simple dental hygienist.

-Okay, Presley said she needed a distraction

so she can sneak inside the tree, any ideas?

-Yes, but you're not gonna like it.

-Uh-oh...

-I'm really sorry.

Pittstown rules, Altoonisburg drools.

[gasps]

-It was him!

-Security, have that young man
with the fabulous hair removed.

-With pleasure.

-Oh, man, not the hair--not the hair!

[loud thud]

[applause]

-Sorry, but it's for a good cause.

-Happy to help.

-Well, now that the Pittstown
trash has been taken out,

let's get back to it.

If Al chooses strawberries,
it's six more weeks of summer.

[cheers and applause]

But if Al chooses blueberries,

school starts on Monday.

-Whoo!

[fanfare]

-Come on out, Al!

-All right, this is your moment, buddy.

No, our moment.

[cheers and applause]

-Boy, that sure is the real Altoonisburg Al!

[cheers and applause]

-Let's see what Al chooses.

-Yes!

[cheers and applause]

-They're loving me out there.

[cheering]

[upbeat music]

[grunting]

-Agh!

-Hurry up, Fisher, Possum Day is starting.

-Go without me, I live in a wall now.

-I don't know what to do, I'm out of ideas.

-We tried science, now
it's time to try Jag-Jitsu.

Aki-ya!

[bed creaks and thuds]

-Oh, hello.

-You did it!

Maybe sometimes hitting stuff is the answer.

-Out of my way!

So much lemonade!

[upbeat music]

[cheering]

[booing]

-Man, Al is on fire this year.

I'm glad I let him nap.

-Yeah, but maybe Al is really pushing his luck

and should just pick something already!

-I have to pick.

I love summer but Lex really
wants her birthday at school.

Oh, man, blueberries it is.

[groaning]

-There you have it, Altoonisburg Al

chose blueberries.

-Aw, she chose blueberries for me--

And by she, I obviously mean Al.

-Hey, wait a second, he didn't actually eat any.

The blueberries just fell out of his mouth.

-[gasps]

Bacon boy is right.

-Uh...

-Yeah, those blueberries
didn't go down his esophagus.

I'd better investigate.

Wait a second!

[gasping]

-This possum is a puppet.

-Who's in the tree?

[shocked murmuring]

-Oh, my gosh,

the curse has been lifted.

I turned from a possum back into a human!

-Uh-uh, that's not how curses work.

You didn't get true love's kiss.

-Explain yourself.

-Uh...
-I can explain.

Um, see, what happened is

we knew that somebody
was going to try and kidnap Al,

someone from Pittstown.

[booing]

So we put the real Al somewhere safe

and we replaced him with this puppet.

-And here's the man behind the plan, Jaget,

head of possum security.

-Yeah, this was all Jaget's idea.

-He's a hero.

[applause]

-Hero is a strong word,

but in this case, entirely accurate.

I guess I'm so good I planned all this

without even realizing.

Go me.

-So, where's the real Al?

-I'll tell you where.

Right here, inside all of us.

-No, where is he really?

-Uh...
-Um...

-He's right here.

[cheers and applause]

-You did it. But how?

-With this, try it.

-Possum juice!

-I told you I'd recreate it

and as soon as I did, Al came running.

-So what was the secret recipe?

-Chocolate milk, ginger
ale, and a pinch of bacon.

Sounds gross, tastes great.

Oh, and also, I got your pawtograph.

-This is the best day ever!

-I'd agree, except for the part where

Jaget threw me in a garbage
can and rolled me down a hill.

-Once again, really sorry.

-All right, people, it's the moment

we've all been waiting for.

[fanfare]

Go ahead, Al, make your pick.

Al, where are you going?

[confused chatter]

-I don't think he's gonna be
eating anything for a while.

Al drank a lot of possum juice, like, a lot.

-So what do we do?

-Yeah, do I get my birthday at school?

-Or do we get six more weeks of summer?

-When elected mayor, I knew
there would be tough choices.

This is not one of them.

We're going to split the difference.

I hereby rule three more weeks of summer.

[cheers and applause]

-Hey, you get your birthday at school.

-And you get three more weeks of summer.

-And I get to sing Happy
Birthday to you at school.

-No, don't, I'll be so embarrassed.

-And now that I know the recipe,

I can drink possum juice all year long.

But no more today. I drink a lot of possum juice.

Like, a lot.

-And I'm a hero, plus I got the keys to the city.

-Those are the keys to my car--gimme.

-Still a hero.