02x20 - We Have a Bingo!

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Side Hustle". Aired: November 7, 2020 - present.*
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After accidentally setting their principal's boat on fire, best friends Lex, Presley, and Munchy create an app to get jobs to pay off their debt.
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02x20 - We Have a Bingo!

Post by bunniefuu »

-And now the cheese.

And now the cr*cker.

And now the best part.

Both: Yay!

-Lex, I have something
very important to show you.

-Sorry, Fisher. We are extremely busy.

-Dad says girls love Irish foot dancing, so...

[Irish folk song playing]

♪ ♪

[phone chimes]

-Shut it down, Fish. I got a text.

Listen to this. My GG needs our help.

-Your grandma Gladys?
-Yeah.

So she plays bingo with
her lifelong best friend Ethel.

She wants us to fill in
for the normal bingo caller.

Apparently they watched "Forrest Gump"

and decided to run across America.

[phone ringing]

-Oh, it's my brother Rex. Hey, what's up, Rex?

-My remote control truck broke.

Can you take me to get it fixed?

-I can't. We got to go to bingo.

-I'll break the news to my truck.

But he's not gonna like it.

-I can help out your brother.

-That's really sweet of you.
-It is, isn't it?

-I'll text Rex and let him know.

-Come on. Let's go.
-Enjoy bingo.

Tell GG I say hi!

Science log .

Operation Irish Foot Dancing was a failure.

But new plan,

Operation Get to Lex
through Rex is about to begin.

-GG!
-My little pretzel!

Ethel, come over and say hello.

-Ethel! How's your dog Coco?

Ethel and I see each other at the dog park.

We talk about that weirdo who brings his cat.

-Such a weirdo.

-GG, we think it's so cool

that you and Ethel have
been friends your entire life.

-Yeah, you're an inspiration for me and Presley.

-It hasn't always been easy.

But if we can do it, so can you two.

-Come on. Let's do our warm-ups.

-You betcha.

Both: B-I-N-G-O! B-I-N-G-O! B-I-N-G-O!

-What's up, bingo fam?!

-Munchy's here?
-Bingo Jaget in!

-Hey, George, is that a new walker?

Doris, love your haircut.

Benjamin, congrats on the new grandkids.

-What is happening? What, Jaget is nice?

-What are you doing here?
-What are you doing here?

And why do you have matching outfits with Jaget?

-Well, my brother and I have
been coming here for years.

-Years?
-Yeah.

It's the one place he acts like a nice guy.

The bingo generation has an
appreciation for his authority

as a crossing guard.

So you guys get bit by the bingo bug?

-No, my grandma Gladys
wanted us to be the caller tonight.

-Wait, Gladys is your
grandma? She's a bingo legend!

I mean, it's a luck-based game, but still.

-I can't believe you kept your
bingo life secret for so long.

-There are actually eight secrets

I haven't told you about,
and this is one of them.

-What are the other ones?

You really do like coleslaw, don't you?

-Hey, pretzel. It's called bin-go,

not bing-stand-around-talking-to-your-friends.

-I get my sass from her.

-Hi, Rex.
-Hey.

Thank you for agreeing to fix my truck.

I would have been up here sooner.

But your dad kept making me popcorn shrimp.

-Yeah, he does that.
Just put it with the others.

-Okay, let's see what we're working with.

-Well, you think you can fix it?

-Oh, not only can I fix it,

I can modify it to make it way better.

-Oh, I've always wanted a
turbo boost to do cool jumps.

-Yeah, well, I have some other things in mind.

But speaking of cool jumps,

let's jump right into getting to know each other.

Ooh, random topic.

Let's talk about what our dumb sisters like

and don't like in complete detail.

You go first.

-I...
- .

-I Jaget!
[Munchy laughs]

-Good joke, bingo bro.

-Thanks, bingo bro.

-Oh, I forgot to mention that today

we are playing for this bedazzled fanny pack.

-Ooh!
-Oh.

-B...
- .

-[gasps] Bingo!

-Oh, you're holding it upside down.

-Oh, my bad. It's actually B- .

-Bingo!

-They called B- first, so I won.

-B- was the correct ball, so I won.

It was an honest mistake.

-It was a thoughtless mistake
made by your granddaughter.

-Um, sorry for the confusion.
-Yeah.

I just held the ball upside down.

This really isn't something to fight over.

-I agree because you were clearly wrong.

-Give her a break. s and s are very tricky.

-There's a line under the .

-In my defense, I just thought
that the was wearing a hat.

-Maybe you should stop talking, pretzel,

and let GG handle this.

-Nobody handles Ethel.

This is just like when I wanted
a fanny pack for my birthday.

-Oh, here we go again!

-And you bought it for yourself.

-It happened in eighth grade.
-It still hurts.

-Get a life!
-You get a new friend.

-[gasps] Fine with me. This friendship is over.

-Ah!

You don't walk out on me. I walk out on you.

-As soon as you drop me off,

I am never talking to you again.

-Ooh!

-What just happened?

-♪ I got, you got me ♪

♪ We got this ♪

♪ I like the odds when we're side-by-side ♪

♪ I like the sound of that ♪

♪ Oh, we're taking off, gonna do this right ♪

♪ I like the sound of that ♪

♪ And when things go up in flames, we're on it ♪

♪ 'Cause I got you, got me, we got this ♪

-That's weird, it feels like our cr*cker stacker

isn't getting any taller.

-Yeah, that is weird.

-How can we be building a cr*cker stacker

when we tore down a friendship?

GG and Ethel were friends
for years, and we ruined it.

-Oh, this has been brewing for a while.

When you've been playing
bingo for as long as I have,

you can tell when there's bad bingo blood

just below the surface.

-Yeah, but if something
like this can happen to them,

it could happen to us.

-That is my worst nightmare.

They became friends when
they were nine, just like us.

-We were six. Stop mixing up numbers.

-We have to make this right.

I can't have my GG go through
life without her best friend.

-You know what you need to do?

You need to remind them why they're friends.

-Great idea.

Lex, you talk to Ethel. I'll talk to my grandma.

When we soften them up, we'll have them meet

at the Mooery. They'll get back together.

-Ooh, yes, and Munchy can
go get some party supplies

to celebrate them becoming friends again.

-Okay, let's get to work.

We can just finish the cr*cker stacker later.

-Hey. Wasn't this taller?

-I don't remember it being taller.

-Science log .

Have established a real connection

with subject TK- , AKA Rex,
AKA my future brother-in-law.

-Hey, Fisher.
-Hey, TK- . I mean, Rex.

Are you ready to test out
your new and improved truck?

-I'm so ready.
-Here, check it out.

I set it up to control it on my phone.

-Oh, cool.

-I also added a sound system.

[Europe's "The Final Countdown" playing]

-Oh, yeah. I love this song!

-Me too! Here. Your turn.

-Awesome.

Should we try to go over a jump?

-Well, let me think about it. Yes!

-Yeah!

-Thank you so much for coming, GG.

-When you said you wanted to make a family tree,

I had to come over right away.

-Okay. I got this branch.

I figured this could be the mom.

And then this little guy could be like the baby.

-You have no idea how a
family tree works, do you?

-I do not.

But what I do know is,

it's lonely going through life as a tree alone.

What you need is another tree right by your side,

supporting you and making you laugh.

And sometimes making you lemon bars.

-Okay, I get what this is about.

-You do?

-Yeah, you want me to make you lemon bars.

-Uh, no. Well, yes.

But this is about your friend Ethel.

-I only have one thing to say about her.

[blows raspberry]

-She means so much more than...

[blows raspberry]

Who held your hand when
you got that weird dragon tattoo?

-Ethel.
-And who held your hand

when you got that weird dragon tattoo removed?

-Ethel.

-It makes you think, doesn't it?

-About what?

-About being friends with Ethel again?

-Oh, yeah.

Maybe you're right.

-Great.

Now what's the ETA on those lemon bars?

-Here's Reggie as Alexander Hamilton.

And this is him as Spider-Man, AKA Peter Parker.

-Oh, and how did this photo
of you and Gladys get in here?

-I don't know. But delete it.

-Well, it sounds like Gladys

must have been a terrible friend.

-Oh, I wouldn't call her terrible.

For my last birthday,

she got us backstage
passes for The Jonas Brothers.

I like Joe, but Gladys has a thing for Kevin.

-Mm. Interesting.

-Say what?!

We happen to be in the same place

where your best friend is.

What are the odds?

-I am as shocked as you are.

-Going down, cups!

Yes!
-Yeah!

-Awesome.

Hey, Fisher.

Thanks for fixing my truck
and for being such a cool guy.

-I'm having a lot of fun hanging out.

-Awesome.
-Here, you take it for a spin.

-Oh, awesome.

Let's play some of that sweet rock music.

[phone beeps]
-Science log .

Rex is coming over to get his truck fixed.

He has no idea that I'm just using him

to get intel on Lex--

Wait. Let me explain. You see--

-So the only reason you were being nice to me

was to learn stuff about my sister? Ugh!

-O-okay. Okay. It did start that way.

But once we started hanging out,

I actually had a lot of fun.

-I can't believe anything that you say!

Rex demands justice!

-Gladys.
-Ethel.

-So since you've randomly
bumped into each other,

seems like you might as well make up,

and then one of you can make me lemon bars.

-Sounds like a good idea.

We can make up right after she apologizes

for trying to steal my bingo win.

-I had bingo first, and you know it.

-Here's what I know.

You called my granddaughter
a thoughtless dumb-dumb.

-She actually didn't call me a dumb-dumb.

-She was thinking it.

-Give me back my fanny pack!

-You keep your hands off me.

-Okay, I'll keep my "hands" off you.

But not my feet. Hyah!

-Oh!

-Whoa! How did she do that?

-These two take water aerobics.

They're in great shape.

-You kicked the wrong grandma.
[yells]

[both grunting and yelling]

[dramatic classical music]

Sorry for the mess.

-Have a seat.

♪ ♪

-I gotta start taking water aerobics.

-You want to get nuts? Let's get nuts.

[both grunting]

-Congrats on being friends again!

Let's celebrate!

-Oh!
[laughs]

-Oh, so thoughtful.

-I feel like I missed something.

-Get ready for the Ethel Train.

-I'm gonna kick your caboose.

-Thanks for the fanny pack.

-There's a chance we made this worse.

-I can't believe your grandma
threw Ethel out a window.

-I can't believe Ethel used my
friendship flowers as a w*apon.

-So that's it?

They're never gonna be friends again?

-No, we can't let that happen. I have an idea.

Remember when we were
kids and we were arguing over

who would win in a fight,
a unicorn or a leprechaun?

-A leprechaun.
-Unicorn.

Well, we spent almost two
hours not speaking to each other

until Tall Mary said it was a dumb argument

because unicorns and leprechauns weren't real.

-Oh, yeah.

Then we became friends again,

dressed up like a unicorn with a leprechaun hat

and scared her so bad she cried.

-I missed a leprecorn att*ck?

-Well, the point is, we stopped fighting,

and we worked together
when we had a common enemy.

Both: Tall Mary.

-Well, we should do the same
thing with Gladys and Ethel.

-But who can be their common enemy?

They don't even know Tall Mary.

-I'll tell you who they do know

who is way worse than Tall Mary.

-Short Kimberly.

-No. Regular-size Jaget.

-But Munchy said that his bingo time

with Jaget is special

because it's the only time that he's nice.

-Eh, honestly, we've been
playing bingo for years.

And I've been thinking of switching it up

to something more exciting.

Like pickleball.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah.

I mean, I know how much
your grandma means to you,

and I want to make her happy,
which will make you happy,

which in turn makes me happy.

So I guess I'm really doing it for myself.

-This plan sounds good.
-We could have a bing-off.

-A what?

-Ugh, I forget how little
you two know about bingo.

Okay, so a bing-off is when two teams square off

in an intense game of rapid-fire bingo.

That way, Jaget and I could compete

against Gladys and Ethel.

-Let's do a bingo-off.
-It--it's bing-off.

-That's what I said. Bingo-off.

-No, bing-off.

-Bingo-off.
-Bing-off.

-Bingo-off.
-Bing-off.

-Bingo-off?
-Bing-off.

-Bingo-off.
-Bing-off.

-Bingo-off.
-Okay, let's just go!

-Bing-off.
-Bingo-off.

-We're starting off today
with something special.

-A bingo-off!

-Bing-off! Come on!

-We're gonna randomly select two teams

to compete against each other.

-The first team is Munchy and Jaget.

-[gasps] Say what?!

-The second team is Gladys and Ethel.

-Uh-uh.
-Uh, not happening.

-You know, Jaget, those two probably don't want

to participate in the bing-off

'cause they're gonna go jaywalk instead.

-What do you mean?

They'd never disrespect the crosswalk like that.

They're--they're sweetie pies.

-Yeah, that's what I thought too.

Before I saw them throw litter on the crosswalk.

[Jaget gasps]

They also think that traffic lights are better

than crossing guards.

-I'm no longer in a super-great mood.

I'm in a super-revenge mood.

-Too bad there's nothing you can do about it.

-Attention!

Glady and Ethel, I'm gonna take you down.

-What's gotten into you?
-The truth about you two.

You seem nice, but outside this bingo gymnasium,

you're a bunch of law-hatin' dirtbags.

-Who are you calling dirtbags?

-Yeah, you better take that back.

-I never take anything back,

you dirtbags.

-If you want a bingo beatdown, you got it.

Even if I got to team up with this cheater.

-Looks like the bing-off is bing-on.

-It's actually bingo-off.

-No, it's not!

-Rex! Thank you for coming.
You gotta let me apologize.

-Zip it! I just came to get my truck.

So don't even say anything.

-I won't say anything, but the truck will.

Science log update.

Instead of bonding with Lex,

I have instead bonded with subject TK- ,

AKA Rex, AKA my new friend.

-So you just expect me to forgive you

because you say you're my friend.

You probably don't even mean it.

-And I really mean it.

Come on. I was a total jerk.

But I really did think we became friends.

And as a peace offering, check this out.

-Whoa! You added the turbo-boosters I wanted.

-Yep.
-Awesome.

-She's all yours.
-Sick!

Turbo-boost!

["The Final Countdown" playing]

♪ ♪

-No! There's half a truck
sticking out of our house.

My dad's gonna k*ll me.

-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that.

But also, you kind of deserved it.

So justice!

-Yeah, I guess I did.

So you want to come back some time,

and we'll fix your truck and add some hydraulics?

-For sure.

Here, text me when you're
done being grounded, okay?

See ya.

-Okay. Let's go over the rules.

-Two teams, cards each. Rapid fire numbers.

-With sixes and nines properly identified.

-First bingo wins.

Only one team can come out on top.

-And it's gonna be me, jaywalkers.

-Let's do this!

[cheers and applause]

-D- .

-B- .
-N- .

-O- .

-B- .

-I need you to focus.

We need to destroy these rotten old ladies!

-Relax. We're the bingo bros.

-I'll relax when we win

and those women are behind bars!

-I really want to throw
that guy through a window.

-I was just thinking the same thing.

-O- .

-G- .
-I- .

-B- .
-Wait!

Yup. Definitely B- .

[cheers and applause]

-We just need one more square. We're gonna win!

-O- .

Both: Bingo!

[cheers and applause]

-Bing-no!

-Well, Jaget's back.

-Does this mean we're friends again?

-We were always friends.

-Oh!
-[laughs]

But what are we gonna do about this?

-I guess we'll have to fight for it.

-No need to fight for it
because I got my bedazzler,

and I made a second fanny pack.

-[laughs] We're fanny pack twins.

-Great job, guys.

Our plan totally worked.
Let's stay friends forever.

-Boop.
-Boop.

-Boop.
-Let us get in on that.

Boop.
-Boop.

All: Boo-whoop! [mimic expl*si*n]
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