01x25 - The Ending World

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Neon Genesis". Aired: October 4, 1995 - March 27, 1996.*
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Anime series centers on a teenage boy recruited by a paramilitary organization named NERV to control a giant cyborg called an Evangelion to fight monstrous beings known as Angels.
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01x25 - The Ending World

Post by bunniefuu »

Like a cruel angel

Become a legend, young boy

When a blue wind
Knocks on the door to your heart

You just gaze back at me
And smile oh so gently

So eager for something
You touch so softly

Those innocent eyes
Know nothing of the fate that awaits

But one day, you will realize
That upon your back

You have wings
You can fly to the faraway future

The cruel angel's thesis

One day, you'll take off through a window

If your overflowing pathos

Leads you to betray your memories

Then embrace the heavens and shine bright

Become legend, young boy

RAISON D'ÊTRE,ONE'S REASON FOR BEING

THE REASON IT'S OKAY TO BE HERE

THE CASE OF SHINJI IKARI

A BOY WISHED FOR HIS OWN DEATH

A BOY GRANTED HIS WISH

THE FINAL ANGEL IS GONE

YET SHINJI IKARI AGONIZES OVER IT

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

I didn't have any choice!

WHY DID YOU k*ll HIM?

Because Kaworu was... He was an Angel!

WASN'T HE AS HUMAN AS YOU ARE?

No! He was an Angel! Our enemy!

WASN'T HE AS HUMAN AS YOU ARE?

No! No! He wasn't!

But he was a person just like me.

No! He was an Angel!

So you k*lled him?

That's right! If I hadn't,
we all would have d*ed!

Everyone would have d*ed!

So you k*lled him?

I didn't want to do it!
But there was no other way!

SO YOU k*lled HIM

Help me...

SO YOU k*lled HIM

Help me...

SO YOU k*lled HIM

Help me!

SO YOU k*lled HIM

Somebody, help me!

SO YOU k*lled HIM

I'm begging you! Somebody, please help me!

Yeah, if only one of us could survive,
it should have been him.

He was a way better person than I am.

Kaworu should have survived!

You're wrong. Only those with
the will to live get to survive.

He craved death.

He abandoned his will to live
and clung to a false hope.

You didn't do anything wrong, Shinji.

Really?

Did I really do the right thing?

I don't know. What should I do?

What should I do?

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?

Afraid?

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?

Myself?

WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?

Being rejected.

By who? Who?

I'm afraid... of Father!

I was abandoned by Father. He hated me.

What will I do if people hate me?
What should I do then?

What is this place?

Where should I go?

I can't see anything.
I can't make anything out.

Ms. Misato?

Ms. Misato!

Hey! Where did you go, Ms. Misato?

Hey! Where should I go from here?

Ms. Misato! Asuka! Ayanami!

Tohji! Kensuke! Ms. Ritsuko!

Mr. Kaji!

Father!

Mother...

Somebody, tell me...

Please, tell me what I should do!

Evangelion Unit 01...

In the end, is piloting this all I have?

Am I supposed to pilot this again
like Father and everybody else says?

Even if it means k*lling people I like?

Mother! Say something! Answer me!

WHY DO YOU PILOT THE EVA?

Because people tell me to.

THAT'S WHY YOU PILOT THE EVA?

To... To help everyone!
What's wrong with that?

YOU PILOT THE EVA TO HELP EVERYONE?
TO HELP OTHERS?

That's right! That's a great thing!

It's a really great thing!

Everybody praises me when I do!
Everybody takes care of me!

That's a lie.

What are you, an idiot? That means
you're actually doing it for yourself.

There you go again, making excuses
to yourself right off the bat.

I am?

The mindset that you're
doing your best to serve others,

that's a cop-out right there!

It is?

What it boils down to
is that you're lonely, Shinji.

I am?

That's just dependency!
A symbiotic relationship!

Maybe that's true...

You're just hoping that
you'll be needed by others!

Maybe that's true...

You're just sitting around, waiting for
someone to bring happiness to you!

To bring you false happiness.

But don't you do the same thing?

OUR SECOND CHARACTER

THE CASE OF ASUKA LANGLEY SORYU

I don't remember getting in,
but I'm back in the Eva.

Forced back into it.

It's not like this busted
piece of junk even works.

No, I guess I'm
the busted piece of junk...

They don't want me.

Nobody would ever want me!

Nobody needs a pilot
who can't operate an Eva!

You're looking to others
to define yourself.

Shut up!

SEPARATION ANXIETY

You're afraid of being alone, aren't you?

You're afraid that if everyone else
goes away, so will you.

That's why you pilot your Eva.

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

I don't want to hear that crap,
not from a doll like you!

OUR THIRD CHARACTER

THE CASE OF REI AYANAMI

Who am I?

Rei Ayanami.

But who... are you?

REI AYANAMI

You're also Rei Ayanami?

Yes. I'm an object
that's called Rei Ayanami.

We're all objects that
are called Rei Ayanami.

Why are all of you me?

Because other people
all call us Rei Ayanami.

Why do you have a heart and body
that are forgeries?

They aren't forgeries. Because I'm me.

No. You're a person whose fake soul

was created by a human named Gendoh Ikari.

You're nothing but a fake object
that is pretending to be a human being.

See that? Inside of you is a heart

that's a dark, impenetrable,
unfathomable abyss.

The real you is in there.

I am the real me.

I became myself
over the time that I've existed

and through the connections
that I've formed with others.

The person I am is shaped by
my interactions with others.

Interactions with others
and the passage of time

will change the shape of my heart.

THOSE ARE LINKS?

Yes. Those are what created
the person that I have been,

the object called Rei Ayanami.

They will create the person I will be.

THOSE ARE LINKS

But there's another, real you.

You just don't know it.

You don't want to see her, so you just
keep avoiding her subconsciously.

BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID

Because she might not be human in shape.

Because the person you have been
up until now might disappear.

YOU'RE AFRAID

You're afraid that who you are
will vanish.

You're afraid that you'll disappear
from everyone's hearts.

Afraid? Why would I be afraid?

Your own personal world
would disappear, too.

ISN'T THAT SCARY?

It means you would disappear.

ISN'T THAT SCARY?

No, that would make me happy.
I want to die.

What I want is despair.
I want to return to nothingness.

But I can't.
I can't return to nothingness.

He won't let me go back.

He won't let me go, not yet.

I came into existence because he needs me.

But it's over now.
I won't be needed anymore.

I'll be abandoned by him.

I had always longed for that day,
but now I'm afraid.

Let's go.

This is the day

you were born for, Rei.

Yes, sir.

AND...

THE INSTRUMENTALITY OF HUMANITY BEGINS

BACK TO SHINJI IKARI

What's this sensation?

I think I've felt it before.

Like the lines of my body
are melting away.

It feels nice...

It's like I'm getting bigger,
spreading out.

Forever... and ever...

THIS WAS HOW EVERYONE'S
INSTRUMENTALITY BEGAN

PARTS THEY WERE MISSING

HEARTS THEY HAD LOST

THAT EMPTINESS IN THEIR HEARTS WAS FILLED

THE INSTRUMENTALITY OF
THE HEART, THE SOUL, BEGINS

EVERYONE'S INSTRUMENTALITY BEGINS,

RETURNING EVERYTHING TO NOTHINGNESS

No, we aren't returning to nothingness.

I'm simply returning everything
to its beginning.

Returning to the mother
who has been lost to this world.

Our hearts will become one,
and we will achieve eternal peace.

That's all this is, nothing more.

That's the Instrumentality Project?

Yes. We all have a part of our heart
that is forever empty.

Something we have lost.

THIS CAUSES EMOTIONAL STARVATION

THIS CAUSES EMOTIONAL ANXIETY AND FEAR

We all fear that darkness within us,

and we live our lives
trying to escape it or banish it.

As long as there are people,
that darkness will never disappear.

So you think we should merge
everyone's hearts together

to get them to make each other whole?

And without anyone's consent?!
What gives you the right?!

That's just forcing people
to cozy up to each other!

But you yourself
always wanted the same thing.

Where am I?

THE CASE OF MISATO KATSURAGI
(PART 1)

This is my heart inside
your heart, Ms. Misato.

And at the same, it's also my heart
inside your heart, Shinji.

For me to find myself, I need to interact
with lots of different people.

I need to take a good look inside myself.

I need to take a good look at
the Ms. Misato that's inside me.

Ms. Misato, what do you wish for?

DO YOU WANT TO BE A GOOD GIRL?

I need to be a good girl.

WHY?

Because Daddy is always gone.

I need to be a good girl and help Mommy.

But I don't want to end up like Mommy.

Because Mommy is always crying
when Daddy is away.

I shouldn't cry. I shouldn't act spoiled.

That's why I need to be a good girl.

And I'll make sure that
Daddy won't hate me.

But I hate my father.
That's why I hate being a good girl.

I hate it... I'm so tired.

Tired of keeping myself
all clean and pretty.

Tired of the me that keeps up
the charade of being clean and pretty.

I'm exhausted.

I want to get sullied.

I wanted to see myself absolutely filthy.

That's why you slept with him?

No, I loved him.
That's why I slept with him.

Were you really in love with him?

Yes, that's right.
He accepted me for who I am.

ARE YOU SURE?

He was gentle with me!

No! Please! Don't show that to Shinji!

It's nothing to get
embarrassed about at this point.

It's embarrassing!

Why is it embarrassing?

You were fine with it
in front of the man you loved.

In fact, you loved
parading around off like this.

No! Stop!

The truth is, you actually love
letting Shinji see you like this.

That's a lie! You're wrong! Wrong!

Really, now?

It's really your father
that you want to show this to.

You're wrong!

You tried to find solace
in Ryoji's face as he slept.

You're wrong!

You tried to find solace
in the warmth of Ryoji's body.

You're wrong!

You tried to find your father
in Ryoji's arms.

You're wrong!

It's true.

I recognized my father in Ryoji back then.

That's why I ran away from him.

I was afraid.
It was like my father and I were...

But the truth is,
I ran away because I was happy.

It felt so good.

Those were moments of utter bliss.

That's why I hated it.

That's why I broke up with him.

I guess they're right.
"You never have a reason to fall in love,

but you always have a reason
to fall out of love."

You're kind, Ryoji.

Use that kindness... I'm begging you.

Make me filthy.

Don't try to hurt yourself just because
you hate who you are at this moment.

That's just using momentary punishment
to distract yourself.

You really don't want to do that.

You're saying that I should
take care of myself, huh?

Men are all like that.

They get lost in their work,
in their own little worlds.

And leave me behind.

That's exactly what Father did.

They're always running away
from a harsh reality.

Harsh reality?

Meaning me, right?

It must be. Just look at me.
Could anybody blame him?

Knock it off, Ms. Misato!

I can't live with myself sometimes!
I hate myself!

How indecent. That's filthy.

How appalling.

That's so smutty! So absolutely gross!

This is what an adult relationship
is like?! I'm gonna puke!

Congratulations on your promotion,
Major Katsuragi.

The me that's respected is a character
that I play to try to earn respect.

That's not the real me.

The real you is always crying.

No, I'm happy.

AM I HAPPY?

I'm happy.

AM I HAPPY?

I'm happy!

AM I HAPPY?

I'm not! This isn't happiness!

WHAT IS HAPPINESS?

This isn't the real me!

I just try to convince myself that it is!

We can't go through life
unless we do that?

We get scared if we're not with others.

We get anxious.

If someone isn't sleeping next to us.

You're scared of sleeping alone?

So sleeping by yourself
makes you feel lonely?

You can't stand the hole in your heart.

That's why you don't care who it's with.

You're wrong!

No, you just want to experience
simple pleasures.

You want to soothe your suffering heart
with those momentary escapes.

You're just using men
as a means to that end.

You're wrong! You're wrong! You're wrong!

WHAT COULD SHE BE WISHING FOR?

Where am I?

This is my heart inside your heart, Asuka.

And at the same, it's also my heart
inside your heart, Shinji.

THE CASE OF ASUKA LANGLEY SORYU
(PART 1)

Asuka, what do you wish for?

I'll live on my own.

I don't need Mommy or Daddy.
I'll live on my own.

I won't cry anymore.

But I'm still crying...

Why am I crying?

I honestly don't know
how to deal with her.

It's not like a doctor
to sound so unsure of herself.

A doctor is also a human being.
As I've told you before.

Still, it's hard to believe that a woman
like you could be rattled by a child.

She's strangely mature.

So tightly wound
and absolutely unapproachable.

She scares me sometimes.
Have you ever sensed that about her?

Not really.
Anyway, you're Asuka's mother now.

I became your wife
before I became her mother.

-It was at the same time.
-Yes, in terms of societal roles.

But while you can never
stop being her father,

I can stop being her mother
whenever I like.

I suppose that's true.

Don't, Mommy! Don't stop being my Mommy!

I'll be a good girl that you'll love!

So don't stop being my Mommy!

So please look at me!

Don't, Mommy! Please don't k*ll me!

Daddy hates Mommy now.

He doesn't need me anymore.

No, he never loved me in the first place.

He never really needed me
at all, I know it.

So die with Mommy, all right?

Because Daddy doesn't want us.

Am I a nuisance? Am I unwanted?

Die with me...

No! I'm not your doll, Mommy!

I'll think for myself and live for myself!

When I found her,
Mom was hanging from the ceiling.

She had such a happy look on her face.

But I hated that look on her face so much.

I don't want to die. I don't want
to fade away and disappear.

I don't want boys, either!
And I don't want Dad or Mom!

I don't want anyone!

No one will protect me!

No one will be with me!

WHAT DOES SHE WISH FOR?

So I'll live for myself!

But I hate it! It's hard!

I don't want to be alone!

Don't abandon me.

Don't cast me aside.

Don't k*ll me.

What is this?

What your father was working on.
The Human Instrumentality Project.

-That's what this is?
-Part of it, looks like.

The truth is something
we never really know.

What you experience
at any given time are mere facts.

Your own set of facts.

And memory of those facts
gradually become your reality.

Some truths change
and transform over time.

This is a fact?
This is how everything turns out?

There are lots of facts. This is just one.

This is the outcome you wished for.

I wished for this?

That's right. For destruction.
A world where no one is saved.

No! It's a world where nobody
saved me! That's all.

No one can save you.

This is what you wished for.

Destruction. Death.
A return to nothingness.

These are things you wished for.

This is reality.

What is reality?

The world around you.

Your own world, one that exists alongside
time and space and other people.

A world where you yourself choose
how to interpret and accept things.

Right now, it's a world made up of
only what was given to you.

THAT IS REALITY

A world of your own
that you have no control over.

You mean a world where everything
is decided for me, right?!

No, it's not. It's a world
where you make the decisions.

It is a world where your heart
decides how things will be.

THAT IS REALITY

The will to go on living.

A heart that wanted to die.

Those are things that
you yourself wished for.

This darkness and this strange world...
You're saying that I wished for this?

That's right.

You wished for a closed-off world
that's comfortable for you and only you.

To protect your fragile heart.

To protect your pleasure.

This is just the natural outcome.

People can't live in a closed-off realm.
In a world all their own.

But you wished for the world, for
the world around you, to be closed off.

Driving away everything you dislike,
you wished for a lonely world.

Your own heart did this.

It culminated in this tiny world
of peace of mind for you alone.

The shape it's taken here
is one possible ending.

This is the end of the world
that you yourself brought about.

AND SO, THE QUEST FOR INSTRUMENTALITY

CONTINUES

Endings. They can always
be found after a beginning.

Will our wishes lead to our destruction?

Is our hope death itself?
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