03x12 - The Accidental Jurist

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Previously on l.a. Law...

Lack of communication...
This is our problem.

The problem, in a nut shell...

Is that I don't love you.

And I'm afraid that I will
never be able to love you.

Let's give ourselves a
running start for a change.

How about dinner,
an evening, a night?

A night.

Are you going to be in
my life, victor sifuentes?

Oh, yes.

Yes, I am.

Lieutenant ringstrom.

Miss van owen.

You know michael kuzak.

- Yeah, the whitey
hollins sh**ting.
- Right.

Hi.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Miss van owen from the
d.a.'S office, mr. Kuzak.

- Hi.
- This is my wife sally.

- Hi. Got a minute?
- Hi. Come on in.

You got a desk full of work. Maybe
I should come back another time.

Are you kidding? I
haven't seen you in weeks.

Get in here. Want
a cup of coffee?

No. No. Um...

Abby, I've got
something to tell you.

Is everything ok with stuart?

Oh, yeah, everything's great.

No, this is something else.

I know this is probably
none of my business,

And I'm probably sticking my
nose in where it doesn't belong.

Tell me.

I really wish that I wasn't
the one bringing this to you.

And it's conceivable
that you already know,

In which case it is really
none of my business.

But if you don't know
and if other people do...

Ann, what?

Bill ringstrom is married.

Good morning. You're married.

Come on.

Got any kids?

- Two boys.
- You jerk. You scummy jerk.

I suppose I'm supposed
to sit still now

For 16 bars of "my wife
doesn't understand me."

My wife and I have accumulated
our list of grievances.

But I don't know anyone
married for 12 years who hasn't.

We're as happy as a
couple living in pomona

Without central air
conditioning can be.

You lied to me.

At the heart of all
this, you are a liar.

Hey, you're the one
who set the conditions...

No histories, no dark colors.

I kept waiting for some
sign of curiosity from you,

Not just about whether I was
married, but about anything personal,

Like where I went when
we left the hotel room,

How come we didn't
see each other at night.

I just followed your lead.

And if I had asked you
if you were married,

Would you have
told me the truth?

I thought about it enough.

Yeah, I think I would've.

Abigail, I don't blame
you for being mad,

But believe me, I did
not go looking for this.

It just happened.

And I don't want it to end.

I'm a decent guy who
is totally overmatched

By what there is between us.

Decent?

Decent guys don't screw
around on their wives.

Continuing on,
martin vs. Noonan.

Motion to compel
document production,

Motion to compel
interrogatories,

Motion for sanctions,
motion for costs,

Motion to dismiss.

I've gone through
all the motions.

Cute.

- Come on, honey.
- Ann, forgive me.

I wasn't going to inquire,

But since it's
endeavoring to participate,

May I now ask what that baby
is doing in this staff meeting?

We fired our nanny.

And until we get a replacement,
kelsey's gonna be coming in.

Not that we all don't
celebrate your domestic bliss,

But, in that this child
is already cutting

Into your billables at the
rate of 15 hours per week,

I shudder to imagine the
impact on your profitability

Should you start lugging
the thing into the office.

The only alternative
is for me to stay home

Resulting in the forfeiture
of about 35 billables per week

Which, at $185 per hour,

Coupled with the 20% markup
I notice you've been assessing,

Means that either I
lug this thing in to work

Or the firm loses
about $8,000 weekly.

Why don't you decide, douglas?

And what about the
mcmahon deposition?

This is major corporate
litigation, ann.

I've got it covered,
douglas. Don't worry.

Fine. Moving on.

- Fitzpatrick
vs. Steinmetz.
- Yeah. Wrongful death.

We're preparing for trial
endlessly. Right, dorothy?

We have a lot of
ground to cover.

This is the
construction accident?

Yeah. Dorothy has
become our resident expert

On the structural properties
of reinforced concrete.

Good.

Michael, leonard vs.
Dowel food corporation.

Matt leonard just signed a $3
million endorsement contract

With dowel foods.

They make cruncho cereal.

The matt leonard, the
olympic gold medalist?

Mm-hmm.

- He's our client?
- You're kidding.

That's right. Dowel
foods was planning

To put his face
on the cereal box,

Develop a major ad
campaign around him,

Only now matt wants to
come out of the closet.

He's a h*m*?

He's gay.

And because of that, they
want out of the contract.

I don't blame them. Let
him go do fruit & nuttys.

All right, douglas.
What's the status, michael?

Well, trial starts
this week, maybe.

This week? The
case just started.

Well, we're going the
private trial route...

We rent a retired judge,
we rent a courtroom,

We stipulate on the
facts, and we try it.

- And it's official?
- Just like a regular trial.

Both parties agree to
be bound by the decision.

- It's expensive,
though, isn't it?
- Not really.

We pay the judge about 250 an hour
and we have to pay for the room,

But it sure beats going through three
years of motions waiting for a court date.

The only tricky part is we're
having trouble agreeing on a judge.

Sounds like a loser to me, mike,
no matter what judge you pick.

Maybe. Matt doesn't care.

He doesn't want to live
a secret life anymore,

Even if it means
losing the contract.

If you ask me, he should've
kept quiet and taken the money.

Ohh... Silence.

It's ok, sweetheart.

Shh.

It's ok, sweetheart.

It's ok.

- She want to see uncle arnie?
- Give her to daddy.

You want to go see daddy?

You want to see daddy?

I can get her.

People, please.

She likes these keys.

I think she's looking
at you, leland.

Here's my baby. Yes. Hi, honey.

♪ Hush, little baby ♪

♪ Don't you cry ♪

♪ Daddy's gonna bring you... ♪

That's it.

We're adjourned.

You can hold them.

♪ Bum bum bum bum
bum bum bum bum ♪

♪ Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum ♪

I don't mind a
progressive judge, mickey,

But finklestein's off the map.

Come on. He's fair, he's smart.

He's a lunatic.

How about adler?

Orange county hall of famer.

- Charles rosenberg?
- Lazy.

Never reads the pleadings.

How about o'neil?
We both picked him.

- No.
- What do you mean no?

Here he is... Judge lawrence
o'neil, number 10 on your list.

I threw him in there by default.

I had to pick ten. There
wasn't anyone else.

The point is this judge
is common to both lists.

- Well, he's unacceptable.
- Come on, counselor.

You going to do this
in good faith or not?

Conservatism aside,
o'neil is fair, he's honest,

He's got a four-star rating,
and we both picked him.

What the hell more
could you want?

Is he available?

He can start tomorrow.

Ok, o'neil it is.

I'll call him and I'll be
in touch within the hour.

Remember, this is
sealed to everybody

But the parties, the judge,
the stenographer, and us.

- I'll remember.
- Ok.

- I'll talk to you soon.
- Right.

Matt.

Come on in.

How did it go?

Great. We're going
to go tomorrow.

- Hi, mike.
- Hi, abby.

How's it going?

We just picked a judge.

Who is it?

The honorable lawrence o'neil.

- He's conservative,
but he's fair.
- Conservative?

How the hell can we go with
somebody conservative? I thought that...

We've been using this
new private investigator

Named stephanie hall.

She finds things out
that nobody else knows.

Mr. Kuzak, what
are you telling me?

What I'm telling you is that unknown
to the defendant or his attorney,

The honorable
lawrence o'neil... Is gay.

Whoo!

I don't mind telling
you it is wet out there!

Let me help you with
some of this stuff.

How about a hug?

I feel better already.

Can I get you a drink?

A drink would be great.

How was the trip?

Roxanne, these five
days alone on the road

Have been extremely
productive personal growth-wise.

And let me just say
this from the start...

I think you know the depth
to which my love for you runs.

- I know.
- And I think you know

That there is nothing
I wouldn't do for you.

I know that, too.

Why, then, I ask myself,

Is this the winter
of our discontent?

I don't know.

Well, permit me to tell you why.

It is because I have been
inattentive to your needs.

- David, don't...
- Please, let me say this.

I also ask myself is it possible

To be a loving
helpmate and husband

When I'm on the
road half the year?

Is it reasonable to
expect a full-time wife

When I'm only being
a part-time husband?

The answer... A resounding no.

Take on a business
partner... Someone younger,

Someone for whom the road
is a pathway to opportunity,

Not an obstacle to happiness,

Thus liberating
me to remain home,

Where I can run things
from right here in the house.

David, the problem
isn't being apart.

It's being together.

I need time.

Well, of course you do.
Take all the time you need.

No. I need time by myself.

You mean alone?

Yes.

I think we should
separate for a while.

I just got home.

- I know.
- Are you sure
about this?

Yes.

Well, then...

I guess I should go.

No, I'm the one who wants this.

I should be the one to leave.

No, that's all right.

I'm already packed.

I'll just go to a hotel.

I'm used to hotels.

- I'm sorry.
- No, don't be.

This is what you need, this
is what you should have.

Aren't you angry?

Why would I be angry?

This is an almost
perfect night here.

What do you mean, almost?

I'm hungry

And all you have in that
refrigerator are olives.

That's pathetic, alison.

Well, let's go out.

No, look at. It's
raining out there.

I'm not getting out of this bed.

Well, if you could have
absolutely anything...

Fettuccine and red clam sauce

And a mixed green salad.

Would you settle
for kung pao chicken

And steamed rice delivered?

That sounds great.

Hi, this is alison gottlieb.

Can I have a number three

And a number six
combination dinner delivered?

Oh, come on.

I know, I know. The rain.

Oh, great. And don't
forget the hot mustard.

And no msg.

45 Minutes.

45 Minutes?

Yeah, 45 minutes.

Mmm.

That couldn't be them.

Dave, what are you doing here?

Just an impulsive gesture.

I thought you might like
to grab a little supper.

I don't really think so.

Yeah, it is kind of late.

Hey, you want to
hear about my latest?

- Um...
- A concert video

Of the great moslem
diva um khalthoum.

Look, dave, I kind of
have company right now.

Oh, so you're not
alone, in other words.

Right.

Another time it is.

- Why don't you call me?
- I will.

- I'll call you.
- Ok.

Dave, are you all right?

Uh... In point of
fact, no, I'm not.

It seems that my wife
and I have separated.

Oh, dave, I'm sorry.

Not that I should
be burdening you

With my gloomy circumstances,

It's just that I have
no one else to turn to.

Why don't you come in?
You're gonna drown out there.

No, I'm fine. It's all right.

Dave, come in.

December 18th, 1988.

The post office puts
a 25% editorial minimum

On piggyback distribution.

Either of you
familiar with that?

- No.
- No.

Basically, it means putting
catalogs and supplements in polybags

And inserting
them into magazines.

My point being this...

The post office
ruling k*lled it.

Sam addonizio put his life
savings into polybag equipment.

I could have bought him out
for the change in my pocket.

Did i? No.

What I did was give him 80 cents
on the dollar and a lease back.

I'm carrying him while he
converts his operation.

He is now putting out

Shrink-wrapped theme erasers...

Pumpkin-shaped for halloween,

Heart-shaped for
valentine's day...

On his way to having the
greatest year of his life.

Is this not the exact same
way I have dealt with roxanne?

Victor, you know her.

It... It's a real tough
situation, dave.

Be assured, in no way, shape,
or form am I maligning her,

But I have never
said no to this woman.

I have tried to be a support,

A mainstay, a bulwark.

I have tried to be a
man for all seasons.

Where did I fail?

It isn't necessarily
that you failed, dave.

I know I am not a
perfect person.

But, hey, we knew
this from the get-go.

There are sexier guys than me,

Guys with more wit,
more native intelligence.

But are there any
guys more loving,

More sensitive to the
needs of their life-mate?

No, sir. No, ma'am.

When it comes to loyalty,
dave meyer has no equal.

When my roxanne
says, "sit, dave," I sit.

This is who I am.

That's the food.

I could eat something.

Right.

- Hi.
- Is lieutenant
ringstrom in?

- You just missed him.
- My name's abigail perkins.

I'm an attorney. I have some
documents that need his signature.

Oh! Well, come on in.

I'm on the phone.

Make yourself comfortable.

- Thank you.
- I'll be just a minute.

Look, butterflies!

- Hi.
- Hi.

Ok. Yeah.

Bye.

Ok, now, so you have some
papers for bill to sign?

Yeah. I'm an attorney,
and I was in pomona.

Do you want to
leave them with me?

I'm sure bill could
get them back to you.

They're my originals.

I'm sorry. I should
have called beforehand.

- He just pulled away.
- It's ok.

I wish there were
something I could do to help.

No, that's fine. I'll catch
up to him at the office.

Ok, well, I'll tell him
that you stopped by.

- That would be great.
- Ok.

- Bye.
- Bye.

I worked for the brantleys
for almost two years.

Little monica was just a
tiny baby when I started.

Yes, she was, just like you...

Just a tiny, tiny baby.

I love babies.

God, I miss monica.

I cried myself to sleep
when I had to say goodbye.

Then it wasn't your
decision to leave?

Well, when monica reached 4,

They felt they no
longer needed a nanny.

It wasn't like I was
fired or anything.

I didn't mean to suggest that.

I was curious why
they didn't keep you on.

The brantleys liked me
very much, miss kelsey.

Monica loved me,
and I loved her.

Maybe too much.

How do you mean?

Well, I became very attached.

What do you mean, attached?

She had started
to call me mommy,

Which made the end
extremely traumatic.

I wouldn't want to go through
anything that painful again.

So what you're saying, then, is
that you would guard against

Becoming attached to this baby?

I would be very devoted
to kelsey. Don't worry.

But you wouldn't love her
as much as the brantley child.

- Ann...
- What's the point of this?

The point is that you're
going to take deliberate steps

- To stay
distant from this baby.
- Ann, for god's sake.

I'm not going to be distant.
I'm not a distant person.

You did say that you did not want
to become attached to another baby.

- Did you not?
- Yes, but what I meant
by that was...

Thank you, penny.
Nothing further.

Stuart?

Look, um...

I'm going to just walk
on out of here now,

Unless, of course,
you need me to post bail.

Does the prosecution rest now?

Stuart, I have to ask questions.

I can't grab the first person
who walks through the door.

Ann, 20 people have
come through that door

And you've ground every
one of them up into mulch.

Four of them
couldn't speak english.

One of them wanted
her boyfriend to move in.

I'm not even going to
discuss the convicted felon.

You've lost your
mind. You know that.

Stuart, we're talking
about our baby.

No. It seems to me
we're talking about you.

You expect them to
measure up to you!

You want to do it alone? Fine.

I have a deposition
tomorrow all day anyway.

So why don't you do it all
by your reasonable self?

- I will.
- Fine, fine.

So I called mr. Richardson here

And told him
about my intentions.

I explained to him
that I could no longer

Conceal my sexual
identity in good conscience.

And how did he respond?

He claimed I was
no longer qualified

To endorse his cereal product.

He said my being a
h*m* made me incapable

Of personifying a macho
or a wholesome image.

And he told me that the public,

Especially the children,

Would never accept a
gay person as a role model.

And how did you feel
about that statement, sir?

Objection. His
feelings are irrelevant.

Overruled. He can answer.

I devoted every day
of the last 10 years

To track and field.

And as a reward for that, I
was given the opportunity

To compete in the olympic games.

And with that opportunity,
I earned the right

To stand on that center block

And have a gold medal
put around my neck.

This country has been
very proud of me, mr. Kuzak.

I've been given parades.

My hometown named
a street after me.

I went to the white house
to meet the president.

I think that I've
earned all of this.

And mr. Richardson says that
it should all be extinguished

Because in his mind, a gay man

Cannot ever be a
hero or a role model...

Or a person others
would ever admire.

You asked me how I feel.

I feel... Repulsed.

And if he's right...

If this truly is a country that
would summarily reject someone

On the basis of his
sexual preference...

If that's what this nation is,

Then I'm only sorry
that I represented it

As proudly as I did
at seoul last summer.

Thank you, mr. Leonard.

I have no further questions.

Quite a speech, mr. Leonard.

You're obviously a
very intelligent man.

And as an intelligent man,

Are you saying there is absolutely no
foundation to my client's reservation

About your being a
spokesman for his product?

I'm saying there is no foundation
for his blanket assumption

That people will
automatically reject a person

Because of his
h*m*, yes.

Well, then tell us, mr. Leonard,

Why you bothered
concealing yours until now.

I often ask myself
the same question.

Yes, well, I'm asking
you to answer it.

- I don't know.
- You don't know.

You didn't tell your own parents

- Until six months ago,
did you?
- No.

And some of your friends
still don't know. Isn't that right?

Not all of them know,
but that's because...

So, mr. Leonard, you
testify under oath

That my client has no right
to fear your telling the world

When you yourself
have been afraid

To tell your own parents
and your own friends.

I admit I used to be afraid,

But I refuse to live
the lie any longer.

But you lived that
lie long enough

To sign this $3 million
contract, didn't you?

- Objection.
- Overruled.

Why didn't you tell my
client that you were gay

Before signing this
deal, mr. Leonard?

I didn't think it was relevant.

You didn't think
it was relevant.

This is a jock-oriented cereal

Targeting macho
ads to the male youth,

And you didn't think
it was relevant?

Objection. Asked and answered.

I'm giving the witness a
chance to change his answer.

Now, under oath, mr. Leonard,

You really didn't
think it was relevant?

I have nothing further.

Did you come to my
home to terrorize me

Or did you just want to
mess with my wife's head?

Bill, I'm a lawyer.

I spent the whole
week feeding myself

One justification after another
for keeping this thing going,

And then hating myself for not
having the guts to just walk away.

I was hoping if I
went to your house

And met your wife,
if I saw her face,

That it would make it easier
for me to do the right thing.

And did it?

Yeah.

I love you.

That's not going to change.

Tell me something.

Am I the first person
you've ever done this with?

Yes.

- I don't believe you.
- I swear to god.

Well, I bet I won't be the last.

You're too good at it.

Abby, please, don't
kick me out of your life.

I have to.

Your wife is going to find out
about you one of these days,

And I don't want to be the woman
that you're with when she does.

Ok.

He's not being fired
just because he's gay.

It's because he cannot perform the
job functions for which he was hired.

- Which are?
- Well, many things.

We need somebody who
exemplifies masculinity,

A hero people want to emulate,

A man boys want to grow up to be

And girls want to
grow up to marry.

A h*m* does not
project that image. I'm sorry.

But isn't that a form of
prejudice, mr. Richardson?

Absolutely.

Hey, it would be nice
to live in a society

That didn't discriminate
on the basis of sexuality

Or a society that didn't
attach stereotypical stigmas

To its gay members,

But we do not
live in that society.

This is still a world
where h*m*

Are frowned upon
or disapproved of

Or sometimes even condemned.

And do you agree
with that mind-set?

Definitely not.

I wish we were all more
enlightened. I really do.

But so far, we're not,

And I'm trying to
move a product.

And I am not going to pay
out $3 million to be endorsed

By a guy everybody's
going to dismiss.

Thank you, mr. Richardson.

Nothing further.

My client being a heterosexual

Was a material part
of his job function?

Basically, yes.

Well, then why isn't it one
of the terms of the contract?

It wasn't an
express term, maybe,

But there is a morality
clause in there.

Excuse me, are you
saying to this court

That it's immoral
to be h*m*?

No, no, no, no. I
wasn't saying that.

Then the morality clause
doesn't apply, does it?

All I'm saying is that
when we did that deal,

We all thought he was straight.

Did you ever have any
discussions with my client

- About his sexual
preference?
- No.

Did you ever make any inquiries
about his sexual preference?

No.

So you never talked about it,

You never asked him about it.

Not one single word about it
appears in a 22-page contract.

But suddenly you're saying
it's a material term in his deal.

This man is not what we
thought we were getting.

It's as simple as that.

Well, at the press conference

Following the signing
of this contract,

You stated that mr. Leonard

Came on board the cruncho's team

Because, and I quote,

"He stood for
courage, for discipline,

"For determination,

And most of all, because
he was a champion."

These were your words,
weren't they, mr. Richardson?

Yes.

Then tell us, please, sir,

Which one of these
attributes no longer applies.

I'm waiting, mr. Richardson.

Is a gay man incapable of being
courageous or determined?

Is it unthinkable that a
h*m* could be a champion?

- Your honor,
he's badgering.
- Sustained.

One question at
a time, mr. Kuzak.

All right, mr. Richardson,
here's your one question.

Take a look at my client

And tell me what he was before

That he is not still
at this very moment.

I don't want a h*m*
representing my cereal.

Thank you, mr. Richardson.

And I sure hope that someday
you do get a chance to live

In that society that's as
enlightened as you are.

Objection!

Withdrawn. Nothing further.

And isn't it true, miss mcmahon,

That you diverted some of your
company funds for your own personal use?

The only money that I
allocated was to reimburse my...

Your personal
wardrobe, your vacations.

Let her finish, mr. Brianson.

- Let me ask, miss kelsey.
- You did ask.

Now stop b*ating her up and
give her a chance to answer.

I'm sorry.

Perhaps I'll try to
go a bit more gingerly.

Excuse me.

- What's the problem?
- There's a gigantic screw-up
at the i.r.s.

And I've got to get
down there right away.

Who's going to
take care of kelsey?

My secretary's
out. Maybe roxanne.

No, arnie keeps her running
around. She'd be too distracted.

It's the same with
all the secretaries.

Douglas is in his
office. I could ask him.

- Give her to me.
- Ann, you're in the middle
of a deposition.

She'll sit next to
me. She'll be fine.

You can't take a baby...

I am not leaving her
with a total stranger.

- Go. We're fine. We're fine.
- You sure?

I've got a little
baby-sitting snafu here.

We're going to have
an extra visitor.

I object to this sleazy trick.

- Sleazy trick?
- Yeah, this is
all about control.

You're not fooling anyone here.

This is a way for you to exercise
dominion over these proceedings.

- What?
- You have to
take care of the baby.

You don't like the way
the questioning is going.

I build up a little
momentum here,

And it's "time out,
the baby needs me."

- What crap!
- You are the one
who's full of crap!

Let the record
show that miss kelsey

Has brought a newborn
infant into this room

To willfully and purposely
disrupt this proceeding.

This is the dumbest
thing I've ever heard.

This probably isn't
even your baby.

You probably rented it just so
you could screw up this deposition.

This is my baby, and she is
not screwing up anything!

If that's what you wanna do,

I'll subpoena the little bastard
and I'll drag it into court.

You woke her up. I
hope you're happy.

I want the baby's intrusive
crying on the record.

And I also want the record to
reflect a piercing, shrill-like shriek

Emanating from said infant!

Will you shut up?!

I can't take this. I'm
gonna get a migraine.

I'm gonna sue you for this, too!

Sue me all you want, you
corrupt puddle of pus.

Shut up!

This deposition is over!
I want everybody out!

I want everybody out!

Yeah, it's ok. I said out!

It's all right, baby.

I wasn't ready for how
boring my life would be,

How endlessly dave
would go on about junk mail,

Audio cassette promotion,

Point of purchase displays.

This is my work.

This is what I do for a living.

It's what pays for the
roof over our head,

The clothes on our backs,
the automobiles in our garage.

Those are things. I
don't care about things.

Why did you marry me?

It's a fair question.

Why did you?

I was alone.

I was, uh... Ashamed.

I was a 38-year-old woman
who couldn't pay her bills.

I was scared.

So you married a good daddy

Who would take care
of you and make you safe.

Yes.

It didn't work out
that way, did it?

Obviously.

Why do you think?

You're the expert. You tell me.

Because dave meyer
isn't your daddy.

And you're not his little girl.

He wants sex,
romance, companionship.

- Exactly.
- He wants a wife,

Not a scared,
helpless little girl.

We had an agreement.

He knew how I felt.

I didn't marry him
under false pretenses.

You make me accept
you the way you are,

Yet you refuse to
accept me the way I am.

You make me beg for every
single crumb of affection.

You make me feel
ashamed of who I am.

This is not having an agreement.

I was wrong, ok?

I thought I could do it.

I tried to do it and I can't!

No! No, you married me
to come in from the cold.

Now that you're in,
you wanna push me out.

- That's not true!
- You want the truth?

Ok, here's the truth.

I will no longer feel
ashamed of who I am.

I will no longer apologize
for being a rich schmuck

With a postage meter and
an up-to-date mailing list.

Either you accept
dave meyer for who he is

And you agree to be mrs.,
Underline mrs., Dave meyer,

Or we can end this
marriage right now

And you'll never have to
be embarrassed by me again.

Well, gentlemen,

You've presented an
interesting dilemma.

- Are we ready to go?
- Yes, sir.

On the one hand,

You can't fire somebody
just because he's gay.

On the other hand,

You can fire him if
he can't do the job.

Now, the question here
is whether somebody

Can be deemed unable
to do the job per se

Because of his status
as a h*m*.

Well, fortunately,

I don't have to
resolve that question,

Because before I consider

Whether a contract
has been breached,

I must first be satisfied

That a valid
contract was formed.

And here it wasn't.

The defendant clearly
thought he was getting

An individual capable of
projecting a macho persona,

And the plaintiff clearly
concealed his h*m*

With the full
knowledge, in my opinion,

That the defendant would
never have made that deal

If he had known the true facts.

I believe this
nondisclosure was material.

I find there to be no valid
formation of a contract,

And I hereby rule in
favor of the defendant,

Dowel food corporation.

I will have this drawn up with
copies to be sent to the parties.

- That is all.
- Thank you very much,
your honor.

- Thank you very much.
- Congratulations.

I'm sorry, matt.

You did your best.

Why don't we walk over
to my office? We can talk.

No, I'm going to
have to walk this off.

Let me, um...

Let's talk later. I got
to get out of here.

Mr. Kuzak.

A moment of your time
in chambers, please.

Take a seat.

I'm a very conservative
judge, mr. Kuzak.

I'm a little curious as
to why you selected me.

Your reputation for
fairness, among other things.

Would those other things

Have anything to do
with stephanie hall?

I beg your pardon?

A private investigator by
the name of stephanie hall

Has been asking
pointed questions

About my personal life.

And a little digging of my own

Reveals that she's sometimes
employed by your firm.

I have no doubt
that my reputation

Played its part in your
selection, mr. Kuzak.

And, frankly, I think it stinks.

I had a very tough case to try.

I didn't want to make it tougher

By encountering
any unfair prejudice.

I figured you wouldn't
condemn a person

Based on his sexuality.

That's well put, counselor.

But the truth is
that you're the one

Who's guilty of prejudice here.

You automatically assumed
that my private lifestyle

Would factor into my
professional judgment.

Do you also make that assumption
about heterosexual judges?

I didn't assume anything.

I was hoping to find somebody

Who recognized that
gay people can be heroes,

That they can endorse products.

And I'll be the first
to applaud your cause,

But as a gay person,
let me also tell you

I'll be the first to recognize

That public acceptance
is not here yet.

Do you think I'd be
elected or reelected judge

If people knew
the truth about me?

Uh-uh.

If anything, my being
gay hurt your case.

It made me all too aware

People don't want to see
our faces on cereal boxes.

Thanks for the bone, judge.

You just gave me
grounds for appeal.

Excuse me?

You said your being gay
could've hurt my case,

Suggesting possible
judicial bias against us.

Judicial bias?

My ruling was completely fair

And you damn well know it.

All I know is that I have to do
whatever I can to protect my client.

And that means taking
advantage of your admission here

If that's the only way
I can open this again.

That is a total
longshot, counselor.

Which I have nothing
to lose by taking.

Look...

I don't want to expose your
private life, your honor.

That's not my intention here.

But I have to do everything
I can to serve matt leonard

Or I will be guilty
of malpractice.

But if you were to set aside
your verdict of your own accord,

For whatever reasons
you decide, then...

I don't suppose any of this
stuff about your personal life

Would have to come out.

Right or wrong, counselor,

I have decided to keep my
sexual identity a secret,

Mainly for electoral survival.

But over the years,

I've asked myself
a thousand times...

What would happen if somebody
threatened to expose me

Or extort me in
the middle of a trial.

I've never known
exactly how I'd respond.

Now I do.

My ruling stands.

You do whatever you
think you have to do.

Ahem.

Hi.

Where were you?

I spent the night at
the sportsman's lodge.

I was worried about you.

Really?

I had never seen
you so angry before.

It was uncharacteristic
of me. I apologize.

Don't.

That's what we go
to a therapist for.

That's no excuse for
acting like a bully,

Especially to the woman
that I love more than life itself.

See, that's the kind
of stuff that I hate.

What stuff?

"The woman I love
more than life itself."

I never know what to say
when you talk like that.

Sorry.

And then you do that.

What?

Apologize.

David, if we're
going to make it,

We've got to start being a lot
more honest with each other.

Toward that end, then,

I miss sleeping in our bed.

I miss that first vision of you

When I open my eyes.

You're doing it again.

Sorry. No, what
I mean to say is...

David... Come home.

You mean it?

Yes, I do.

This is something, then.

A man... A woman...

- Dave.
- Right, right, right.

I'll be home by 6:00.

Well, that's about it.

Your only sh*t is
to claim judicial bias

And try to overturn the verdict.

Do you think he was biased?

No, but what I think
and what I can argue

Are two different things.

And if I did get a new trial,

What would be my chances?

Lousy.

The new judge would probably
see it the same as o'neil.

But if I can just get
the verdict set aside,

At least we're back in the game
again with new cards to play.

I'm sure I can settle
and get you something.

Nuisance value if nothing else.

The price being
judge o'neil's privacy.

The price being that, yes.

You think his ruling
was fair, right?

I do.

Then I'm not sacrificing him.

That man has just as
much right to stay private

As I do to go public.

I'm not going to
destroy a person

Over nuisance value. No way.

I think that's probably best.

Well...

Thank you for
everything, mr. Kuzak.

I'll see you around.

Matt.

It's not often I find myself

Actually admiring
one of my clients.

Yeah.

I make a hell of a
role model, huh?

Hi.

Bad day, huh?

Bad year.

I feel like the only
reprieve I had was when I was

Suspended from
practicing altogether.

And that was for
going up against a guy

Who'd never been to law school,

Who also ended up b*ating me.

A slump's a slump, cowboy.

It happens.

I feel like this one's
never going to end.

Do you think I'm losing it?

Mm-mm.

No.

You're not losing it, counselor.

Believe me.

Can we go home?

Yeah.

Let's go home.

There you go.

Are you ready to go night-night?

Kelsey markowitz,
these are such spiffy pjs.

Come on.

Ooh!

Do all babies smell
as wonderful as you?

You know what?

I ruined a whole deposition
yesterday because of you.

Probably lost a client,

Cost the firm a lot of money.

And you know what else?

I don't care.

And you know what else?

It's not so bad
without a nanny, is it?

We're doing just
fine by ourselves.

Oh, boy.

You two look so beautiful.

Here, take her.

- There she is.
- Come here, big girl.

Come here. Ooh!

That's a girl.

You got my finger?
You got my finger?

Not too bad, huh?

Not too bad.

That was a kiss.