11x08 - Snaketastrophy

[bunniefuu]

[theme music]

♪ Go, Ninjago ♪

♪ Jump up, kick back
Whip around ♪

♪ Hey, go, Ninjago ♪

[Cole] "Snaketastrophy."

[Dan] Today's news,
tomorrow's history.

I'm Dan Vaapit and this
is Ninjago City News.

Chaos. Fire balls. Serpents.

Our city is under att*ck. Again.

We're going live
to our number one reporter,

Fred Finely, to bring you
this breaking story. Fred?

Fred Finely here, five-time
award-winning reporter,

in downtown Ninjago City
to report

an inclement weather pattern,

fireballs falling from the sky.

-[hissing]
-[people clamouring]

And these
aren't ordinary fireballs.

These flaming spheres
transform into fire snakes.

Did you say, fireballs
that turn into fire snakes?

I did, Dan.

And as I'm sure you can hear
the terrified, shrieking screams

of the citizens
of Ninjago behind me,

the burning question
on everyone's mind is,

where are the Ninja?

[Fred] Not a single one
of our sworn protectors

has shown their face
in this dire time.

Why have the "heroes" of Ninjago

chosen to abandon us
in our hour of need?

-[people screaming]
-Back to you, Dan.

A topical report, Fred,
and somewhat concerning.

We'll be sure to check back
on the destruction of our city.

But first,
something less important.

Our ever-reliable Gayle Gossip
is reporting

from this year's puppy-petting
competition at Fur-Mart. Gayle?

Oh, why do they always give

the breaking news reports
to that blowhard Fred?

I'm twice the reporter he is.

Just because he bleached
his teeth, they think...

-[Vinny] Uh, Gayle...
-Don't defend him, Vinny.

He's a conniving weasel,
not a reporter.

-[Vinny] Gayle.
-I'll tell you another thing--

-[Vinny] Gayle, we're live.
-What's more fun than puppies?

Petting puppies.

This is Gayle Gossip,
here at one of Ninjago City's

most charming annual events.

Fur-Mart's annual
Puppy Petting Competition.

-[people clamouring]
-[hisses]

[dogs barking]

Holy smoke.
Tell me you got that.

[Vinny] I got it, I got it.

There's been
an unexpected interruption.

The Fur-Mart
has just been att*cked

by what appear
to be flaming snakes.

[Vinny] Gayle, we need to go.

Yes, we do. After those snakes.

That's where the real story is.

We, uh, seem to be having
some technical difficulties.

Let's take this opportunity
for a commercial break.

We'll be back
after these messages.

[hisses]

Are you tired of evacuating
Ninjago City on foot?

Wouldn't you rather evacuate
in style

behind the wheel
of your very own pre-owned car.

At Smith Daryll's used car lot,

we've got the most
affordable vehicles in town.

And these deals
are hot, hot, caliente hot.

Come on down
to Smith Daryll's right now.

Aah!
I mean right now, immediately!

These deals won't last forever!

Oh, no, run!

-[screams][/i]
-♪ Smith Daryll's Used Cars ♪[/i]

Don't you think
we should probably go inside?

The fiery glow
from these fireballs

is really going to burn
our skin.

Not my skin.

[giggles]
I came prepared,

with my Fireblock SPF .

Wow. Does it really work?

Well, of course it does.
[laughs]

[announcer] Fireblock SPF
does not block fire.

Fireblock has been known
to cause rashes,

irritation, dizziness, hair loss

and slurred speech.
Use with caution.

Man, all this running around
and all these fireballs

are sure making me thirsty.

Ugh. Me too.

Wouldn't it be great

if there were a friendly little
karaoke club somewhere?

It sure would.

Heh. Well, you're in luck.

Because guess what just reopened

after extensive renovations?

That's right,
Laughy's Karaoke Club.

[laughs]

So come...

So come on down and have
a nice refreshing boba drink

and sing some songs.

Tuesdays are half-off.

The savings
will make your head spin.

[imitates tornado whirling]

Welcome back.
Dan Vaapit here, checking in

with multiple award-winning
Fred Finely

for an update
of what people in town

are now calling
"Snaketastrophy."

Fred Finely here, six-time
award-winning reporter,

and I want to hear from you,
the people on the street.

The little guys.

Let's ask, where are the Ninja?

-[man screams]
-Sir?

Interesting perspective.
You, ma'am?

They're probably hiding out
in that temple of theirs.

I haven't given up on the Ninja.

In the darkest times

is when we need to believe
we can win the most,

and the Ninja
would never let us...

Uh-huh, yeah, sounds great, kid.

Excuse me, Mr Serpent.

-Fred Finely, NGTV.
-[hissing]

I'm a hard-hitting reporter
looking for the truth.

What is your real purpose
in our city?

We have come
to cause suffering and pain

and to end your civilisation
with the flames of torment.

Let's check in with Gayle Gossip
at the Fur-Mart.

I'm not at
the Fur-Mart anymore, Dan.

We're trailing the serpents.

They don't appear
to be mindless monsters.

It's like there's a pattern
to their movements.

They're all converging
on one point.

Up here, Vinny. Look.

They've been summoned

by some kind of
snake witch leader.

We need to hear
what she's saying. Come on.

[Vinny] Oh, man.

Today was supposed to be
just puppies.

Just puppies!

Find the Treacherous Deceiver
and bring him to me.

-[growls]
-What?

Where did you find this?

-[growls]
-This is the w*apon.

This is the scroll

the Treacherous Deceiver
used against me.

"The Ninjago Museum
of History Presents

Ancient Weapons
of the First Age."

Where is this museum?

I will have this w*apon

and use it against the Deceiver.

[serpents growl]

There you have it,
viewers at home.

In an NGTV exclusive,

we've broken
this story wide open.

-[Vinny] Uh, Gayle?
-The Pyro Vipers rampaging

through our city
are seeking an ancient scroll.

Possibly a w*apon or a magical--

-[boxes thud, crash]
-Who are you?

I'm a citizen of Ninjago City.

And I'm not scared of you.

I am Aspheera.

-And you should be.
-[hisses]

Uh, the Ninja will stop you.

Ninja?
Those fools who released me?

Released you?

I entombed them in a pyramid
and left them

to burn in the flames
of my wrath.

You will never set eyes
on the Ninja again.

They are gone.

Other villains have thought so,
but they were wrong.

The ninja will be back.

Your faith is misguided.

Tell me where this museum is,
and I will spare your life.

[Vinny] Three blocks that way.
Oh, uh, whoops.

Bring them.

-[rattles, growls]
-[Vinny] Uh...

As we all know,
Snaketastrophy has become

a serious issue
in our community.

So NGTV has gathered
an expert panel to discuss.

Point, counterpoint.

City Councilwoman
Andrea Thomson,

what is your opinion
on "Snaketastrophy"?

I find raining fireballs,
mass destruction,

and the armies
of evil snake warriors

dangerous for
our local neighbourhoods.

Good point.

And you,
City Councilwoman May Robsen.

I agree.

Well, uh...

Back to our number one reporter,
Fred Finely.

And they just let Gayle Gossip
scoop my story.

Me, a seven-time
award-winning reporter, who--

[spluttering]
Who is currently doing

person-in-the-street
interviews with...

Where did everyone go?

-[snake growls]
-[screams]

Help! Somebody help me!

[screams]

[tyres squeal]

[grunts]

[snake roars]

[screeches]

[sobs]

Thank you.
You're back. Thank you.

I thought that thing
was gonna eat me!

It's okay. You're gonna be fine.

I'm not gonna be fine. I'm not.

I'm gonna be scarred
for the rest of my--

Hey, buddy, it's okay.
You're all right.

[gasps]
Okay, yeah.

I'm... I'm okay now.

Look, we have to go.

We've got to find Aspheera.

She's the cause of all this.

[sniffles]
Gayle Gossip already found her.

Aspheera is on her way to
the Ninjago Museum of History.

What are we waiting for?
Let's hit the road.

[motorcycle engine revs]

Fred Finely here, in time--
[coughs]

How does this work?

Am I doing it right?

[Vinny] Uh, yes, ma'am.

You just say whatever
you wanna say, heh.

Very well.

Hear me, citizens of Ninjago.

Among you, somewhere,
lurks the Treacherous Deceiver.

The traitor.

The one who imprisoned me
for thousands of years.

And during all that time,
one single thought sustained me.

Revenge.

Revenge!

And I will have it.

I swear it. I will find you.

I will find you
or watch all Ninjago burn.

Burn!

I'm afraid that's all
we've got time for today.

Be careful out there,
Ninjago City.

Looks like it's gonna be
a hot one.

That's today's news
and tomorrow's history.

Thanks for watching.

[snake roars]

[closing theme music]