05x05 - Weed Wars

[bunniefuu]

These canyon roads
have always had

high accident stats.

'Blind curves,
falling rocks'

improper grading,
wildlife.

Oh, well,
Getraer knows that

he also knows
when the accident rate jumps

all of a sudden
there's got to be a reason.

Just cause
they call it weed

doesn't make marijuana
any easier to grow.

Nice and sticky.

Looks like
harvest time.

There's some activity
on the south slope

of the Varro Farm.

I think I'll drop in
and pay them a call.

Hey, Kenny.

Yee-haw!

Yee-haw.

Hey, there goes
the weirdo.

'That guy's crazy.'

LA 15, Mary 3.

We have an 11-80
top of Topanga and summit.

Roll an 11-41.

'10-4, 7 Mary 3.'

Alright.

Uh, listen,
I want everybody to back up.

Get in the back of the bus,
come on.

Alright, get back.

Hey, the van's going to blow!

Alright, come on.

One at a time, now.

Hurry up,
the van's going to blow.

Come on,
hurry up, Ponch.

Alright, come on.
Grab a hold of my hands.

Now, boys,
get out of the way.

Come on, hurry up.

Come on, come on,
right down here.

That a girl.

Come on.

Come on!

'Come on, Ponch.
Hurry up, let's go.'

Get down!

Yeah, same here.

- Anybody here see anything?
- Yeah.

The hexer up there,
he saw it all

probably caused it.

What?

The hexer up there.

'His name's Tyler.'

Why do you call
him the hexer?

He hexed me, that's why.

You mean he put on you
some kind of curse?

He gave my sister
a whole week of zuper zits.

'And he got my pitching arm.'

I can't even find
the strike zone anymore.

Well, we'll be
talking to Tyler.

He may have seen something
from up there.

Now, I'm going to need
your name and addresses.

Start with you.

Mark Levin.

Watch out
for that kid Tyler

he can really zap you.

Aren't you a little old
for ghost stories?

Look, how come Tyler
wasn't in school today?

He was.
But he doesn't ride the bus.

He takes shortcuts
across the valley.

He changes into a coyote
and runs over the hills.

I've seen him.

Oh, when you talk to Tyler,
don't mention my name, okay?

Why take chances, right?

Yeah, right.

Yeah, that's great.
Thank you.

No one on that
school bus was hurt.

Oh, good.

You know,
we were lucky.

That guy was
trying to k*ll us.

Yeah, I know.

The other marijuana growers

have been having hassles, too.

Irrigation pipes torn up,
fields burnt.

I knew we'd have problems

when we started all this.

Insects, fertilizer
premature flowering.

I never figured on this.

Let's get out of here.

Excuse me, miss.

Oh, is there anything wrong?

No. Hi, I'm officer
Jon Baker.

This is officer
Frank Poncherello.

How do you do?

We're looking for witnesses
to a bus accident

on Topanga Canyon.

We understand
that a boy living here

named Tyler
might have seen it.

I'm Loretta Lensford,
Tyler's sister.

Is it alright
if we talk to him?

Yeah. Tyler was here
just a minute ago.

Tyler!

Tyler!

Tyler, come on
over here, honey.

These officers
want to ask you some questions.

- Hi.
- Hi.

It's about the accident
that happened down the road.

Would you two like
something cold to drink?

Uh, water would
be fine, thank you.

Look, anything you tell us

will help out, alright?

Did you see anything?

Saw the accident.

Did you see the vehicle
hit the bus?

Can you describe it?

It was a pickup truck.

Anything else?

Such as?

Such as color, make,
identifying marks

a driver's description,
a license number.

Tyler, just a minute, now.

Just try to remember, okay?

I mean, maybe you can think
of something, was there..

...was there anything
unusual about the truck?

It was being chased.

Chased? By what?

Another truck, that's all I saw,
it's not my business.

Gotta go feed my animals.

Just a minute, son.

You leave me be.

Not until you answer
my questions.

This is a serious situation.

Is this supposed
to mean I'm hexed?

Your first hex?

Uh, I got over
that supernatural nonsense

when I was three.

Well, glad to hear that.

Hey, this is a brand new pen.

'It's got to have ink.'

Ponch, maybe not anymore.

Aw, man.

Can't go around all day
looking like that.

Do you think..

Do I think what?

Nothing.

Nothing.

You know, it's bad luck
to be superstitious.

And lastly,
I want to keep up

our high visibility
in the Topanga area.

Yesterday,
we had a multiple TC

that came close
to becoming a tragedy.

Now, something crazy up there
is spilling out

onto the highway
and I want somebody

to tell me what it is.

'Okay, take off.'

I'm buying.

Good.

- Ponch.
- Yeah?

Your tires were soft

and all your
fluid levels were down.

What did you do to
your bike yesterday?

Just an ordinary day.

Oh!

Maybe I can save
the frames.

Maybe you ought to quit
while you're ahead.

Ahead?

Oh, don't get
psyched out, Ponch.

Now, uh, you know, it's just
another coincidence, that's all.

What kind of coincidence?

Well, what's been happening?

Well, yesterday
when Ponch and I

were going back
to Central

Ponch went through
four ballpoint pens

tore his shirt
on the bumper of a car and..

...lost his personal
phone directory.

Yeah, 12 critical numbers.

Mostly unlisted.

- When did all of this begin?
- Oh, yesterday.

We met this kid
in Topanga, and he..

...put a hex on him.

Yeah, complete with pentagram.

Do you believe it?

Do you?

You're the guy
with the truck?

Yeah.

Come on.

I represent an organization.

Spend a lot of time..

...developing, testing..

...importing,
marketing our grass.

You guys plant a few seeds

try and score
on a closed market.

It's our market.

I've got
a non-negotiable deal

for you and your
penny ante pals.

You sell to me
or you don't sell at all.

Up till now..

...everything
has been a warning.

You try and market your smoke..

...we'll burn you bad.

I'll pass the word.

- Great, that'll help a lot.
- Yeah.

He's too scared
to try anything.

There's always somebody
who wants to be a hero.

Have something ready.

Okay.

So what's the deal?

I think we just got
one of those offers

you can't refuse.

Tyler said one truck
was chasing another.

Yeah, it fits the same pattern

of most of the other accidents

high-speed collision chases.

Check out this dirt road, huh?

You got it.

First it's thieving hikers,
then grazing animals

outside harassment,
now, it's the cops.

I tell you,
from raising these things

nurturing them into adulthood

they get primo, we can't even
get it to the buyers.

We just had a run
of bad luck.

Look, we can't let a couple
of accidents get us down.

We got a crop
to harvest, okay?

It's not ready yet.

Yeah, you're right.

Get 'em in there.

Let's get rolling,
Spiff.

What's the rush?

I just got a strange feeling
we're being watched.

Let's go.

LA 15, 7 Adam,
I have a visual on two trucks

speeding southbound
on a dirt road north of Topanga.

'Request backup.'

Mary 3 and 4 responding.

Hey.

Get away from here, man.

Ha ha!
Yee-haw!

Yaah!

Okay, you in the checkered shirt
get up and head towards the car.

Let's go.

Come on,
let's get back to Bear.

'That's no ordinary truck fire.'

'Must be a half a ton
of dope down there.'

When these fumes
hit Topanga Village

there's going to be
a run on junk food.

At least now we know
what's behind all the accidents.

A weed w*r.

I guess we lost
the other half of this party.

Yeah, but we
got a witness.

What do you
think of that?

Better call Central
for a trailer.

For me or my motor?

Alright.

We got a marijuana w*r
on our hands.

The Canyon roads
are dangerous enough

without big dealers
and small timers

battling it on the pavement.

Now, I want to stay
on top of this.

Keep your eyes open and maintain
tight communication.

Okay, go to it.

Frank.

Yeah, sarge?

Uh, you want to fly a desk
for a couple of days?

Uh, no way, sarge.

Come on, I know
you're concerned about my--

Bad luck?

I prefer to use
the word coincidence.

Good going, Ponch,
keep fighting it.

Look at it this way

with all this stuff
raining down on you now

you got five years
of sunshine coming.

Frank, I hope
the clouds part soon.

Yeah, me too.

Let's go.

Hmm.

'Ponch.'

I got some
information for you.

That fireball really
had me stumped for a while.

Then I theorized that the change
in atmospheric pressure

created by riding up
in the Topanga area

caused a vacuum,
and a fine mist of fuel

seeped out of a pinpoint leak

and ignited on contact
with the hot manifold.

You found the leak!

No. No.

Oh, what do you think?

I'm with you, Ponch.

Yeah?
Well, where am I?

Harlan, I thought you were
working on Ponch's motor.

I did.

What's the matter?

I went over that motor
with a microscope.

I gave it a clean
bill of health.

He's out there checking it now
to see if I made any mistakes.

He's impugning my integrity.

Harlan, don't feel hurt.

This kid they're dealing with,
really has Ponch spooked.

He's supposed
to be good with kids.

City kids.
This kid's from the country.

His grandparents brought him up
in the hills of West Virginia.

It's a case of culture shock.
You understand.

- No.
- Harlan!

Harlan, Harlan.

This kid's had a hard time
opening up with anyone

let alone authority figures.

I've got relatives in Kentucky

and I'll tell you
mountain people

are very distrustful
of strangers.

They've got
a lot of superstitions, too.

You tell Ponch and Jon?

This kid feels
out of place here.

I bet he started this hex thing

just to stop kids
from teasing him.

Why don't you tell
Ponch and Jon?

The trouble is he might
start believing it.

Kids do that
with their dreams.

Hey, you want me
to tell Ponch and Jon?

I wonder
if it's one of those cases

out of uniform, more authority.

On a kid's own turf.

On a kid's own terms.

A picnic..
I bet that would do it.

What're you gonna do?

Tell Ponch and Jon.

Tyler! Tyler, we're leaving.

Okay, where to?

Why don't we let Tyler
be our pathfinder?

Oh, great.

Here we go.

Alright, after you, Tyler.

Ah, I'm starved.

This is the place.

Well, I didn't know,
I was so out of shape.

I'd be in a lot better shape

if I get this rock
outta my shoe.

I mean, when I get
this shoe out of my rock.

Hey, Tyler.

You know, we saw you on the hill

the other day
above the accident.

Was that truck that got away

the same one
that caused the other accidents?

Alright, you know..

...you know, kids
are saying that you're making

these accidents happen.

They don't like me.

Yeah, maybe it's just that,
uh, they don't know you, huh.

Listen, between
you and me and the cosmos.

How do you deal
with the little hexer?

With extreme caution.

'It's true, but not
because of the hexes'

but because
I'm the last chance he's got.

I'm all the family he has left.

He's got a good thing
going for him.

I just wish he and I didn't
start off on the wrong foot.

I have a lot
of friends up here.

You do?

People in this canyon
like to snare rabbit.

So I save 'em and get 'em all
and leave 'em to go up here.

Yeah, but what about
real friends?

I try.

Oh, like putting a hex on Ponch?

He was asking me
too many questions.

Back home,
we mind our own business.

Oh, you mean like not talking
about moonshine stills?

But, Tyler, we know
all about the marijuana growers.

Then what'd you want
to talk to me for?

Because you've seen
most of the accidents.

I mean, you could be a witness
against the person

that's causing these accidents.

I already told you back home

we mind our own business.

Yeah, I know.

But you live here now.

And this is your community
unless you plan

on being an outsider
the rest of your life.

Everybody sure keeps
making me feel that way.

Well, sure. You keep talking
about hexes and spells.

I mean, it makes it hard
for people to like you.

That's what my sister
says all the time.

'And she's right.'

Look, you gotta quit hiding
behind this hex stuff

and take a chance at just
being yourself around people.

'Hey, aren't you guys hungry?'

You better believe it!

How about you?

Yeah.

Look, uh, when we hike
on down the hill..

...do you mind if I stop
into the ice cream parlor?

Thanks.

Now, before we start eating

I think there's something you
and me need to take care of.

Sure.

You think you could,
uh, cancel my hex?

Sure.

Think we could shake on that?

Can we do this again tomorrow?

I think Jon and Ponch have
to be back on duty tomorrow.

Ah, don't you worry,
we'll do it again.

Come here.

Go ahead and give it a try.

Say hello.

Hiya, Mark.
Hiya, Gary.

Hiya, Mark. Hiya, Gary.

Hiya, Mark. Hiya, Gary
Hiya, Mark. Hiya, Gary.

Hiya, Mark. Hiya, Gary.

- Hiya, hiya.
- Hiya, hiya.

Let's get outta here
before he does something weird.

Yeah.

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

Just hold it, Tyler,
don't let it bug you, eh.

- See what you made me do!
- Aw, man, that's baloney.

'They weren't watching
what they were doing.'

'You had nothing to do with it.'

Did, too.

Things don't work
that way, Tyler.

Oh, yeah?

You get a double hex now.

'Tyler!'

Tyler! Oh.

Loretta, look if you want us to
stick around, we'll be glad to.

No, I better
catch up to him alone.

A little system I'm developing.

Hmm, uh, order out of chaos?

I keep hoping.

You guys hear the latest?

Poncherello got
two flats yesterday.

I checked both tires..

...there's no punctures

no slow leak, nothing.

How's he dealing with that?

On the surface,
he's taking it in stride.

Underneath, he's freaked.

I gotta admit
I might be, too.

Well, being
of scientific persuasion

I've got one word for it.

- Which is?
- Strange.

I have a better word.

Hex?

Phenomenology.

That's a bigger word,
not necessarily better.

Why can't people
be objective about these things?

It's simply
a phenomenologicalproblem.

How can you be objective
about something

you can't even pronounce?

From a raw description
of everything that's going on

I'd have to say first off that..

...that something is going on.

Stay with us, Harlan.

The point is
...one's knowledge of an event

is...affected..

...by the...way..

...one experiences it.

How did you experience that?

Moisture on an unlevel table

and a little subliminal
freeway vibration

that gave it a push.

Possible?

Yeah.

Probable.
It'll do it every time.

Can I give anyone a hand here?

Oh, I was just lending
some perspective

to what's obviously
an emotional issue.

Hexes and spells.

- What?
- Phenomenology.

Aw, come on, now.

I've been hearing a lot
of that nonsense lately

and I gotta tell you..

Aw.

Does anybody remember Topanga?

I said I wanted
that area covered.

"High visibility"
is what I said.

Now, if you all
are sitting here

it follows that
none of you are out there.

Well?

Phenomenology, come o..

As if we don't
have enough problems.

Cops are buzzing around
here like yellow jackets.

Well, maybe
we should just leave it.

Leave it?

I've tended
those Christmas trees

since they were
little bitty seedlings.

If we get zapped a second time

they're gonna look like oak
trees before we see 'em again.

Sam's right, what we're dealing
with here is some basic rights.

And a few thousand dollars
in cash.

Well, if the cash
is so important

then why don't
we just sell to Vincent?

Because I don't think
we'd get the money.

I don't trust the guy.

I'm not gonna
deal with criminals.

Yo, you wanna know something?

Some people think
that we're the criminals.

Oh, come on, Varro,
it's a victimless crime.

Yeah, well, I wanna stay out
of the victim category, okay?

I mean, I don't
like sitting around waiting

on that crash artist
in that pickup.

He's not so tough.

Well, neither are we.

We could blitz 'em.

Cut all the plants down

all at once
by morning we're gone.

Yeah, nobody knows
these roads like we do.

And they put the pressure on us

they'll think we're laying low.

You know, what we got here
is a beginning

of a marijuana growers co-op.

Hey.

Hey, let's do it!

- Let's get going.
- 'Let's go.'

Man, I never would've guessed
farming was such a hassle.

A few more bags,
and we're outta here.

- Music to my ears.
- Yeah.

Oh!

What's the matter,
you getting a contact high?

Oh, hardly.

Those pollen's got
my hay fever going.

Relax. This stuff will buy you
a vacation in the desert.

'See anybody?'

'No, but I'm gonna check
around by the truck.'

I don't see nothing.

I think you're paranoid.

It goes along with the business.

Well, I think
we better get outta here

before both of us get paranoid.

Yeah.

These dopers got
a bad case of independence.

Are you sure
you wanna go along, Mr. Vincent?

Yeah, I wanna make sure
we shut 'em down for good.

- Let's go.
- Okay.

We're not losing him this time.

LA 15, Mary 3 and 4.

Northbound, Oak Ridge at Topanga

request backup in pursuit
of suspect felony vehicle.

'10-4, 7 Mary 3 and 4.'

7 David, a block North,
exit Oak Ridge.

7 Charles, moving
to South intersection

of Topanga and Oak Ridge.

This is 7 Adam,
I'll back you up.

Watch this.

Hey, man,
he's trying to k*ll us.

Whoa!

Get out of the truck!
Get out!

Put your left hand
on your head.

- I'll take him.
- Alright.

Help!

- Help!
- Hey, over here, quick!

- 'Hey!'
- Come on.

- You got 'em, Bear?
- Yeah.

We had no idea there was a kid
in the back of the truck.

Yeah, just save it. Would you
get over there to the cruiser?

We'll take care of it.
Hurry up.

I'm gonna go
for the kid, partner.

- 'I can't hold on!'
- Alright, better use my belt.

Okay, go ahead.

Help!

Help me, Ponch!

I'm gonna fall.

- Here we goes.
- Just take it easy.

Alright.

'Easy.'

Ponch, I'm gonna fall!

Just hold on.

Come on, Ponch!

I can't hold on!

Come here.

Hey, today I have to let
loose my rabbits wanna help?

- Yeah.
- Sure.

Great idea!

- You wanna ride?
- Sure.

You know,
I wanna thank you two

for working
a little bit of magic.

Oh, it was no work
at all, really.

It'd feel a whole
better if, uh..

You know what I mean, uh..

Tyler and me were
all straightened out.

I thought you weren't
worried about the hex?

I'm not.

It'd just be good
to have it all straightened out

that's all.

It wasn't me, Ponch.