07x12 - Ballroom Dance

[bunniefuu]

♪ You take the good,
you take the bad ♪

♪ You take 'em both
and there you have ♪

♪ The facts of life
the fact of life ♪

♪ There's a time you
gotta go and show ♪

♪ You're growin'
now you know about ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪

♪ When the world never seems ♪

♪ To be livin' up
to your dreams ♪

♪ Then suddenly
you're findin' out ♪

♪ The facts of life
are all about you ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ All about you ♪

♪ It takes a lot
to get 'em right ♪

♪ When you're learnin'
the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ Learnin' the facts of life ♪

♪ The facts of life ♪♪

They're K*llers, jo.

Oh, sure, they look
innocent but they're K*llers.

Hard day at work, nat?

Hard day, jo? You
try teaching disco

To housewives for eight hours.

Is the mail here yet?

Yeah, it's on the desk.

A one and two zeros. Be there.

$89.00, are they're kidding?

Federal tax, yeah,
state tax, yeah.

10% Commission for
letting me teach there.

Bandits, bandits in tap shoes.

Wait a minute. That makes $90.

And a $1.00 for the towel.

So quit.

And do what, shuck
oysters at ruben's again?

If I quit, the agency
will stop sending me.

So you complain to me.

Did I tell you?

They've also got me doing
their advertising for them.

I'm handing out brochures.

People think I'm
with the krishnas.

It's humiliating, I'm an artist.

Well then there's only
one sensible thing to do.

Take a shower.

You're right, I just
bought a towel.

Looking great, ladies!

Okay, we're about
to go to the right.

And to the right!

To the right, mrs.
Solomon, the right.

Okay, mrs. Solomon, give me

That funky look
now, lots of funk.

Oh, is that beautiful?

Very funky, mrs. Solomon.

Okay, ladies, we're gonna bring
it home now with a half turn.

Come on, dorothy!

And a high finish,
and we're out.

It was excellent.

Excellent, we'll see
you next saturday.

Should I work on my look?

No need, it was devastating.

Your husband won't
know what hit him.

Oh, what a good-looking
group you got, natalie.

You know, my ankles are hot.

Take off the leg
warmers, mrs. Flynn.

So what brings you
down to the old studio?

Well, uh... This.

I'm already with this school,

But thank you anyway.

No, I'm interested
in a class, nat.

Great! The aerobics
class is really good.

Coco's the instructor,
once you get past the name.

No, no, not the aerobics.

This one, the one with
the couple on the front.

Ballroom dance?

Yeah, ballroom dance.

That's so cute.

Wait, you're kidding.

No. I'm serious, nat.

I'll see you saturday.

Bye-bye.

Why do you wanna
take ballroom dancing?

I don't know, there's just...

There's something
very mannered about it.

Very elegant, very
clean, you know?

Yeah.

Stupid, huh?

No, not at all.

Ballroom dance is one
of the most beautiful

And romantic expressions
of dance we have.

You think so?

I wrote it for the brochure.

So you want me to sign you up?

Yeah.

Cute.

No, come on, this is just
something private and personal.

I don't want the others to
know I'm ballroom dancing.

You are a cute
person, polniaczek.

This is exactly
what I don't want.

You think you can do it?

No problem, I'll sign
you up, not a word.

Can I just say one thing?

I'm cute, right?

Adorable, this woman is.

Well, before we trip
the light fantastic,

Is there anyone here who's had
any ballroom dance experience?

Yes, we have.

Jack and edie.

Could you come up
to the front, please?

Now everyone's gonna
have to do it sooner or later.

Okay, the rest of you

Find your assigned partners
and get to know each other.

You're gonna be spending
a lot of time together.

Chuck. Jo.

Hi, partner.

Hi, partner.

Oh, I guess since
you're stuck with me

There's something
you ought to know.

I've never done this.

I'm no fred astaire either.

My specialty is giving
headaches to running backs.

Your coach making
you take dance?

No.

It's for my girlfriend, it's
sort of a birthday present.

See, she's having this big '40s
party over at the cotillion.

And I want to surprise
her with my expertise.

Oh, that's so cute.

Sweet, I mean.

They look pretty good, huh?

Are you sure this
class is for beginners?

Wow! Did you see that move?

You think we'll
be able to do that?

I don't know, how's your back?

Thank you, that was lovely.

Well, now that we're all
properly inspired, we'll begin.

We do that with the gentlemen
asking the ladies to dance.

Now the preferred overture is,

"May I have this dance?"

Not, "wanna get
down or let's boogie?"

So...

Gentlemen, if you'll
pop the question, please.

May I have this dance?

Of course you can,
that's why we're here.

Gentlemen, begin by
taking your lady's hand.

No, I'm sorry. It's my fault.

Sorry, my hands are cold.
Sorry, my hands are sweaty.

Okay, now, the mastery
of ballroom dance

Is good posture, okay?

You must maintain a
tall, yet relaxed position.

Heads high, chins up.

Fannies in.

Yet, relaxed.

Okay, now...

Ladies, put your hand on
the gentleman's shoulder.

Gentlemen, put your
hand on the lady's waist.

We're gonna try
a simple box step.

Ready, ginger? Ready, fred.

All right, gentlemen,

Take a step forward
with your right foot.

Ladies, step back
with your left, and...

Oh! Ow!

I'm sorry.

No, it was me. It's my fault.

I'm really sorry.

Well, my educated eye tells me

You were both at fault.

Don't watch feet, everyone.

Okay, again.

Same step, everyone.

And... Oh!

It's my fault.

No problem, it's okay.

I'm sorry.

Oh, no, he's got me!

He's a superkid.

Give me some kryptonite, no!

No, I'll get it.

No! We can't have a man answer.

Are you kidding, it's good pr.

Hello.

No, jo isn't here right now.

Sure.

You'll pick her up
on the way to class.

Watch out, you've
learned a new step.

Okay, chuck, I'll tell her.

Bye.

What was that about?

A new step, give me a minute.

Maybe she's taking
a dance class?

So that explains that
cloud of bengay in our room.

She never mentioned
anything about it to me.

Knowing jo, she
might want to keep

Something like
dance lessons private.

Guys.

Hi.

What's this about jo
taking dance lessons?

Where'd you hear
that? Not from me.

Jo's taking dance
lessons, isn't she?

Now how am I supposed to
know something like that?

Well, there's only one
dance studio in town

And you work there.

Gee, you guys are
beginning to look a lot alike.

I want information, natalie.

Right now, I've got a
mystery man called chuck.

Even if I did know
something, and I don't.

I'm not supposed
to say anything.

I'm gonna make
this painless, okay?

I'm gonna name
some dance classes

And you just tell me
which one she's taking.

Forget it, I am not...

Jazz, tap... Forget it.

Disco, slam...

We don't teach slam dancing,
we're near a fault line.

Ballet, ballroom...

Ballroom dance,
thank you, natalie.

Tootie, I'm in awe.

Who knows you
better than anyone?

My mother, and
she can't do that.

Ballroom dance,
that's so cute of her.

I said that.

I can just see her
waltzing across

The dance floor with
her partner, our jo.

In her satin dress
and nike high-tops.

Hey, guys. Hey.

What's up?

Oh, nothing.

Come on, what is it?

Nothing, and it wasn't me.

Chuck called, he's coming
by to pick you up, cha-cha-cha.

All right, don't
everybody start.

It's wonderful
what you're doing.

I find it refreshing.

It's nothing, I just
needed a little exercise.

I hate to jog, all right?

But it's so unlike you.

That's it, you're doing
this to confuse me.

The truth is, it just
appeals to me, blair.

Simple,
straightforward, the end.

Hello. Hi, I'm
here to pick up jo.

Oh, hey, chuck.

What's with the shirt?

Oh, I've got one for you.

It's easier than apologizing
every time we bruise each other.

Oh, thanks.

Chuck, this is edna garrett,

George, andy, blair, and tootie.

What am i, an ottoman?

And natalie. Hey,
natalie, hey, guys.

Chuck and I are in
dance class together.

So it's true, you're
in dance class.

You know I never thought
I'd get into ballroom dancing

But I'm there and loving it.

So let me see what you got.

No, tootie.

Come on, one quick spin
around the living room.

What's the big deal?

'T

Come on, look, we can't,
we're just beginners.

I'll take that into
consideration.

We have no music.

How about this?

They can't tell
from that, chuck.

Besides, we'd be all
worn out for class.

Excuse me. Come on, jo.

No, now come on,
look, I need the chart

With the painted feet on it.

You can help me out
here anytime, chuck.

Please, jo?

You're stalling. Now, come on.

All right, all right.

I guess we'll do
that waltz, okay?

Oh, good, it's the
only thing we know.

Oh, jo!

I'm so sorry, jo,
I'm really sorry.

Yes, I know, I can read.

Are you okay?

Do you want some soup?

I'm fine, really, mrs. G.

The hardwood broke my fall.

Well, I thought you were great.

I thought they
were a lovely couple.

Costumes were original,
good showmanship.

I gave them a 98.

We're rough, we're raw.

Well, that's a more primitive
approach than I'm used to but...

Are you happy, tootie?

I told you we were
just beginners.

All you had to say was no.

I didn't think it was that bad.

I blame you for allowing
me to go through with this.

Hey, I had nothing to do
with it, and jo, don't worry.

You'll be okay for the recital.

Yeah, recital? What recital?

Upon completion of all
dance classes at copeland

Students give a recital.

Invite your family and friends.

We serve cookies and
punch, didn't I tell you?

Jo, it's a tradition,
everybody does it.

It's in the brochure.

Hi, jo.

Hey, mrs. G.

Doing a little coal mining?

Huh?

Here. Oh, thanks, I
was just cleaning.

That attic's a mess.

Oh, I might as well tell you.

Um, I had this idea.

Now it's just an idea and if
you don't like it, just tell me.

What, mrs. G?

Well, uh... I wore a
gown to my senior prom

That was so beautiful.

I still remember
feeling like a princess.

I was about your
size in high school.

Oh, yeah.

And that style
is back in fashion.

And I thought you might like
to wear it for your recital.

I'd love it, mrs. G.

Oh, good.

Now I could've sworn I put it

In my trunk in the
attic but I can't find it.

Well, I don't want you
to go to any trouble.

Oh, you would if
you saw this dress.

Flawless red satin.

I'll call my cousin in appleton.

I still have a couple
of boxes at the house.

Thanks.

There you are, you queen of
the stardust ballroom, you.

Hello, blair.

I still detect a hint of bengay.

You must really be
working those muscles.

No, actually, I just
like the aroma so much.

I'm wearing it full-time now.

What?

Whenever I think of you up
there on that dance floor.

I mean, that you actually
went and paid money

To take those lessons.

I can't believe it.

Is that so ludicrous, blair?

Well, it's just... Yes!

Although, I must
admit, you and chuck

Do add a new slant to it.

I never thought of ballroom
dancing as a full contact sport.

Thanks, blair.

Maybe if I could just understand

Why you're doing it.

Why not?

Because it's not you.

Says who?

Just because I don't have
season tickets to the joffrey

Doesn't mean I can't
appreciate grace and style.

He likes hockey so
he can't like opera?

Does everybody
have to fit into a slot?

Can't we give each
other some room?

I'm sorry.

Yeah. I am.

Twinkle toes.

Are worried about the recital?

Nah.

Think it's a bad sign
mr. Copeland wants us

To register our feet with
the police department?

You guys will do fine.

You think so?

Nah.

Thanks.

Hello.

Jo, what are you doing?

I'm dancing with the furniture.

You know, you better be careful

Or I'm gonna replace
you with a hat rack.

You might have to.

Why? What's up?

Sheila found out I was
taking this dance class.

Ah, no more surprise, huh?

She wasn't too happy about it.

Why? You were doing it for her.

I mentioned that.

And?

Well, it wasn't so
much the dance class,

As who my partner was.

Me?

Sheila's a little jealous.

Well, come on, didn't
you tell her about me?

I mean, I'm not exactly
the kind of girl

That makes guy's
girlfriends jealous.

I know, I mentioned it.

Thanks a lot.

I tried explaining
everything to her, jo.

She's, she's really
a good person.

She just gets
possessive sometimes.

Oh, chuck!

I'm really sorry, jo.

But I've gotta beg off.

Come on, look, I've been

Working on the
dip and everything.

Can't you just talk to her?

I'm sorry.

Relationships.

Yeah, I know, I know.

Hey, I had fun.

Anytime you see me on campus,

You can run up and
step on my toes... Anytime.

How about if I step on sheila's?

I really had fun.

Yeah, me too.

See you, fred.

See you, ginger.

Well, looks like
it's just you and me.

Don't get too excited.

Oh, jo!

I spoke to my cousin in appleton

And she found my prom dress.

It was in a box in the basement.

♪ Do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do ♪

Woo!

♪ Do do do ♪

♪ Do do do do do ♪

♪ Do do do ♪

Yeah!

Thanks for the dance.

Another?

No, I'm whipped.

I've got to sit down.

I'm surprised I
remembered those steps.

That was my routine
from my coming out party.

The night was magical.

A 41-piece orchestra
with all eyes on me

As I danced my way
into everyone's hearts.

Then we had sponge cake,
you should have been there.

You didn't invite me, remember?

An oversight.

You know, jo, if you're
looking for a partner,

I'd be glad to fill in.

Thanks, andy, but no.

I've been watching you
guys practice and I know

I could throw you
around just like chuck.

I've been working out.

Andy.

I can do this, trust me, okay?

Here we go. And...

Oh, yes, have you had enough?

I'll be back. Okay.

You upset about chuck?

Nah, no, I'm not really upset.

Do we have to have
that playing all the time?

I've had clarinets up to here.

Jo?

Chuck!

Hi.

Hi.

It's that closeness that
comes from working together.

So what are you doing here?

Can we talk privately
somewhere a second?

We can try.

I've done some hard thinking
about my relationship with sheila.

This dance recital
forced me to confront

Something I've
suspected for some time.

Which is?

Sheila's not nice.

So I broke it off.

Not over me, I hope?

Oh, of course not.

Of course not.

So I'm out of there.

So what are you gonna do now?

Dance, dance, dance.

Well, do you think
we can we get back in?

Yeah, I called
today and they said

Our name was
already in the program.

Well, then great,
let's get to work.

You mean, we're not perfect?

The lift, chuck, the lift
at the end of our routine?

That doesn't scare me.

'Cause you're not
five feet in the air.

Mrs. G, just the
one I'm looking for.

How hard do you
think it would be

For you to get your prom dress?

Well, I'll call my cousin
in appleton right now

And have it air-expressed.

Thanks, tootie, give
me some clarinets.

Our next two performers
have chosen glenn miller's

A string of pearls.

Would you please welcome
jack and edie hilkirk.

Has anybody seen jo?

Maybe somebody
should go look for her.

The program says she's
on after this couple.

No, nobody should
see her, it's bad luck.

Tootie, that's for brides.

The curse may cover all
formal occasions, natalie,

Do you wanna chance it?

I just hope that dress holds
up under all the pressure.

I had to do some stitching on it

On the hem at the last minute.

If it comes apart during jo's
performance, I don't know what.

Mrs. Garrett, I would trust
my life to one of your hems.

Hoover dam should be so sturdy.

Thanks, natalie, I just
hope it holds out, that's all.

Isn't this couple wonderful?

What are their names again?

That's the hilkirks.

Jack and edie met 30 years
ago at a football game,

And as anyone can see
they're still kicking.

Who writes these things?

Okay, it's not my
best work, but... Shh!

Jo told me about this couple.

She kept saying I hope I don't
have to follow jack and edie.

Now look, she has to follow
jack and edie, unbelievable.

Look, there they are!

She looks gorgeous.

Jo!

You wore that dress in
high school, mrs. Garrett?

You bet I did.

Thank you, jack
and edie hilkirk.

And now I'd like to present
our next two dancers to you.

A very lovely young couple.

Joanne polniaczek
and charles shephard

Will dance to fascination.

It looks like they
waxed the floors.

They didn't tell us they
were gonna wax the floors.

We haven't practiced
on waxed floors.

They should've told us.

Maybe it's the lights.

Ready, fred?

Ready, ginger?

Uh-oh, here comes the dip, easy.

Make it smooth!

Uh-oh, here comes the lift.

The lift comes
right after this turn.

I can't look!